Now and Forever
Chapter 7
Mike was nervous about seeing Christine. There would be a lot of emotions, anger and frustration. He didn't want it to push Christine over the edge. He had stopped and bought her a bouquet of yellow roses before going to the floor Christine was being kept at. Dr. Fitzpatrick met him at the elevator and smiled at the flowers.
"Those are pretty." She remarked.
"Can Christine have them? It's kind of a sentimental thing. When I proposed, I am not romantic, but my mom had yellow roses in her front yard. I picked six of them, tied a ribbon to one of the stems and then tied the ring to it." Mike asked.
"She can have them." Dr. Fitzpatrick said.
"I also brought the socks and sweatshirt she requested. Katie found them for me." Mike told her.
"Good. She's pretty chilled. You ready?" Dr. Fitzpatrick asked.
"A little nervous." Mike admitted.
"Just let her talk." Dr. Fitzpatrick said. They had gotten to a hospital room and Dr. Fitzpatrick knocked and then opened it. Christine was sitting on the edge of the bed, looking extremely nervous. Her wrists were still bandaged, and she was wearing the clothes Mike had brought a few days before.
"Hello." Christine said awkwardly. Mike leaned over and kissed her forehead before he handed her the bag of clothing and the bouquet of flowers.
"I know they aren't your favorite, but I remembered giving them to you the night I proposed. They seemed appropriate." Mike said.
"Thank you." Christine answered. Mike sat on the bed next to her while Dr. Fitzpatrick sat in the one chair.
"You both are nervous. You both have a lot that could be said. So, Christine, you have the floor. I'm just here the mediate." Dr. Fitzpatrick instructed.
"First and foremost, I am sorry. SO, SO many times; you needed me to be a better wife. The kids needed a better mom. I failed you in that respect. Failed you in a lot of respects. We did create three beautiful children, though?" Christine remarked. She was nervous and talking in circles.
"We did." Mike agreed.
"That was another failure. I failed to keep Lucas alive…your boy. You had waited so long and so patiently for him. You love the girls, I know; but Lucas was the boy you had always wanted. Part of the reason I kept the girls so far away was because I was afraid you would take them. Because I couldn't keep Lucas alive, you would have me listed as unfit and take the girls." Christine continued.
"I wouldn't have done that." Mike said.
"Mike, please?" Dr. Fitzpatrick said.
"You said that that night, but I didn't believe you. You and the girls were making plans and none of them included me, or so I thought. I didn't want to live if I had to live away from my girls. I know, someday, they will both move away, but I wasn't ready. I let Lucas go to an overnight camp and then he died." Christine said.
"Christine, remember what I told you. Correlation is not causation. You letting Lucas go to the camp wasn't what caused his death. If the girls did decide to leave with Mike; it doesn't mean something bad would happen." Dr. Fitzpatrick told her gently.
"I have no intentions of taking them away." Mike told her again.
"Christine; part of this is you cheating all those years ago. You and I have spoken about it, but Mike needs to hear it too." Dr. Fitzpatrick said.
"I'd rather not relive that." Mike remarked.
"Do you remember how my dad was?" Christine asked Mike. The affair was painful to him. It had emasculated him.
"I remember he was horrible to you. I hope this isn't where you compare me to him?" Mike asked.
"No, you are nothing like him. My dad hated me. He didn't want a girl. You know some of this. My entire childhood, he was constantly telling me I would never amount to anything. I would never have anything worth having. I met you when we were sixteen and even then; you were too good for me." Christine started.
"I hate when you talk like this." Mike remarked.
"I know but I am making a point. We married right out of high school to get me away from him, but I remember him telling me that I would find a way to sabotage any good thing I had. I suppose that was what I was doing; complaining constantly, spending too much, having an affair, you name it. I had a good thing and I didn't feel I was good enough for it. For you or the kids." Christine said.
"I know this but stop talking in the past tense. You have us. Not had us. You have us." Mike said.
"And I will never feel I deserve that." Christine answered.
"So, what now?" Mike asked Dr. Fitzpatrick. He had picked up Christine's free hand and was holding it. She hadn't let it go and was still holding the flowers.
"Well; technically, Christine still has to stay another twenty-four hours and we need to do some talking about coping mechanisms. Now; Mike, you have a chance to talk?" Dr. Fitzpatrick offered.
"Just…I knew how you were raised when I asked you to marry me. I even knew, someday, you might sabotage what we had. You are the woman I chose to love. Chose to have children with and build a life. Someday, grow old. Spoil our grandchildren and drive our daughters crazy. And now; we will miss Lucas together." Mike said.
"After all I've done to you?" Christine asked.
"I wasn't always easy to live with." Mike answered.
"I think the two of you are going to be just fine. I'll give you a moment. Christine, can I put those in a vase?" Dr. Fitzpatrick asked, pointing at the flowers.
"Yes, thank you." Christine said before she handed them to her. Dr. Fitzpatrick nodded and left them. "I'm so sorry." Christine said. Mike pulled her into a tight hug.
"You have nothing to be sorry for." Mike said. Christine had melted into his arms and was crying into his chest. Instead of saying anything else, he just held onto her.
"The girls?" Christine finally asked.
"Hannah has had a rough time, but they are both okay. Just worried about you." Mike said. He pulled away and wiped the tears off her cheeks.
"I hate that." Christine admitted.
"They are getting to redecorate your room. There was a lot of blood on the mattress and it wasn't in great shape so I bought you a new bedroom set. New quilt and everything." Mike said.
"Oh, Mike." Christine said. She reached up and gave him a kiss on the cheek.
"Well, you may think differently when you see what I picked. It all goes with your paint color too." Mike told her.
"I appreciate it. Makes me ready to get home with you and the girls. I didn't ask…I didn't want to pressure you, but how long are you staying in the area?" Christine asked.
"I'm on vacation right now but my commission is up so I may retire. Still thinking about it, which seems odd." Mike admitted.
"No. Your career is all you've had for years. I understand." Christine told her just as Dr. Fitzpatrick came in.
"Mike; I think I can release Christine tomorrow morning. We will go over a few things then but she's doing well. It also gives her doctor a chance to look at her wrists." Dr. Fitzpatrick explained.
"It gives us time to get her bedroom set back up too." Mike answered. He pulled Christine back into a hug and kissed the top of her head. He loved how she snuggled into his chest and wrapped her arms around him.
Mike hated leaving her, but it was only twenty-four more hours and he had to finish her bedroom. For the first time in years, he felt hope. Hopefully, he could keep that going once Christine got home. He had every faith that it would.