"This is disgusting as fuck," I told Big Jim. "I know this isn't a drug or anything illegal, but it feels like it should be."
"What, the chicken smoothie?"
"Yes, the fucking chicken smoothie," I replied, holding up the brown slop that Big Jim had handed to me. My face contorted from the smell. "You blended dry chicken strips with blueberries and kale, and you expect me to drink this?"
"The macros go hard though," Big Jim told me. "It's like 60 grams of protein for 300 calories."
My hands which were about to throw the smoothie into the bin paused. "Say what now?"
"60 grams," Bim Jim reiterated for my benefit. "If you drink three of these, you still have another 1,000-something calories to eat whatever you want even if you're on a cut - which I know you aren't right now."
My hands started trembling. "The kale and blueberries are there to provide you with micronutrients as well," Big Jim added, seeing that I was hesitating. He brought the slop closer to me and started tantalizingly waving it, making me hallucinate visions of the Promised Gym of Whey Milk and Anabolic Honey.
"I will do what I must," I whispered hoarsely, finally making up my mind. With a mighty shout, I lifted the shaker to my lips and started drinking, feeling the protein infused concoction scald my throat until I was sobbing.
Idly, as I was drinking, I couldn't help but compare it to the Voldermort drinking unicorn blood in the first Harry Potter book, a Pre-Quirk age fantasy novel about magic. It was said that the blood of unicorns had immense and potent properties, and that drinking it would both bless and curse you - just like the shake I was drinking now.
The taste is certainly a curse.
When I finally finished the shake, Big Jim took the container back from my trembling hands and threw it into the corner of the gym.
"Go forth and be anabolic," he told me. "Spread the word."
—
Fast forward a month later, I was introducing the chicken smoothie to every gym bro and person interested in the gym this side of the country.
Big Jim and I had officially launched a partnership together, where he would mix smoothies and I would sell them.
The ingredients were sourced directly in bulk from a supermarket to get economies of scale, meaning that we could purchase large quantities for cheap.
Every day after my morning training with All Might, I would go hustle at the gym and sell chicken smoothies.
Part of my selling was advertising - I would down an entire chicken smoothie and finish a full set of exercises to demonstrate the immensely beneficial properties of the smoothies,
"UWAHHHH!" I screamed, flexing my triceps. "Feel the power!"
The people watching started clapping immediately, and I downed another chicken smoothie.
After I finished my set of tricep pushdowns, I brought all the spectators over to Big Jim's chicken hut and started selling the smoothies we had made.
"Liberty Mutual customizes your insurance so you only pay for what you need- wait that's the wrong spiel - fuck!"
I facepalmed. "Sorry, guys, I've been kinda tired lately. I meant to say: the chicken smoothies are 60 grams protein and only 300 calories!"
"Plus, you can buy our special memberships!" I said encouragingly. "Each membership only costs 5,000 yen a month, and you get a 80% discount on smoothie sales at the gym! They're extremely worth it, and I highly recommend them!"
I struck another pose again to emphasize the size of my muscles for the crowd to watch, making sure to grin hugely. "For the dedicated, we also mix in Bang Energy ™ into the chicken smoothies, so you can get a caffeine boost as you workout!"
"Are you affiliated with Gym Shark by any chance?" Someone asked me. "I heard that they've got a bad reputation for being scammers."
Big Jim flinched a little at those words, but I didn't know what they meant.
"Is that some kind of Pre-Quirk age organization?" My face contorted quizzically. "If so, then I probably don't know them."
"That's a relief," the man told me seriously. "You said the memberships were 5,000 yen right?"
"Yup!"
"They're kind of expensive, but I gym here 6 days a week, so I might get it," the man told me. He handed over the money and grabbed the shaker directly, lifting it to his lips and chugging.
"See here!" I boomed, imitating All Might. "Look at how he's drinking it! Look how anabolic he's become! Sign up now and get your protein shakes!"
All of this was to save up money so I could purchase a new drug that had just hit the market - Neuropump.
I had heard rumours from Big Jim (my dealer) that the Eight Precepts of Death had managed to develop a new nootropic drug that bolstered reflexes if taken long term, and they claimed that consistent users could develop a minor sixth sense comparable to a weak quirk.
Obviously, there were going to be side effects - brain death after a year seemed to be a common one if you abused neuropump too much. People who only took it sparingly would develop mild to severe headaches, and lose their sense of reality and time.
The Eight Precepts of Death were a yakuza gang, and like all yakuza, they needed grunts to do illegal stuff and crimes, and outfitting their members was important. However, no matter ho well you equipped your members, if they were unskilled or just had poor reflexes, it wouldn't stop them from being useless.
That was why they developed Neuropump - so they could mass produce more effective grunts for the gang to use in their gang wars.
If you abused neuropump enough, it would drastically enhance your reflexes so that you could fight better and react better in combat. The people who abused this drug the most even said that they could "sense danger", like an actual perception quirk, which had me very impressed.
All these side effects don't matter to me though.
According to Big Jim, the Eight Precepts of Death were interested in selling this drug to their competition, since it would cripple their henchmen in the long term.
In the short term, it would even out their advantages, but it would definitely cripple their enemies in the long term.
This was because the Eight Precepts of Death held a counterdrug to Neuropump that could reduce the side effects by up to 70%, enabling their members to moderately use neuropump without life threatening side effects, and only mild ones.
It was an open scheme, but the other gangs couldn't do much about it, because they would quickly get overwhelmed by the Eight Precepts of Death if they didn't buy neuropump.
Big Jim was brothers with someone in the gangs, so he had been telling me about the latest gossip.
Obviously, I became very interested in purchasing a supply of neuropump, so I had Big Jim help me contact a secondary distributor to purchase some for my own use.
However, neuropump turned out to be very expensive, and I wouldn't be able to buy it in sufficient quantities on top of all my other expenses, even while working part time at All Might's restaurant chain.
That was why I started selling chicken smoothies with Big Jim.
Soon, I thought. Once the memberships start bringing in money, I'll have enough to purchase a consistent supply of neuropump.