Chapter 34 Ayano Yudasei : The remaining first year at Akademi

I was like in a trance afterwards and spent most of my waking time building the new robot, and mostly ignored everyone around me. Except for the science club member which helped me build some easier robot parts. Thanks to them I was faster. When I went home I greeted my father, and went into my room during most of the summer holidays. My Father was a bit unhappy but I had urgent business to attend to.

And I continued building the robot. Then summer holidays ended and I went to school and finished the robot and then I went to the bathroom and did a second resurrection ritual. Sumire Saitozaki was so glad to be free from the place and would never go to the 3rd floor bathroom again. She was so ecstatic and laughed, cried and danced! It wasn't Sumire Saitozaki who looked like a ghost now, but me to some extent, because of my exhaustion. However, while I still cried a lot, my feelings were unlocked and I stared eating more again and talked more to my friends again, who were worried and now relieved, but I never told them about Sumire Saitozaki. Father was so glad that I started talking to him again.

Oh and Fun girl contacted me and asked me how the hell did I add Sumire Saitozaki to the game-. No this is just a story.

Fun girl was a black and white apparition that is floating around.

She got erased from her original universe after she learnt of the evil plans that Saishou Saikou, her father, had, by a machine that he had created. She thought that the machine was safe to use if a crowd watches, but it wasn´t and she was mostly erased from the universe. So he successfully stopped her from interfering with his evil plans. And used a time loop to steal inventions.

Fun girl told me to search for this special machine in the cave beneath the cherry tree. It was hidden there and could bring her back. I did so, and opened the cave with my friends and we found the machine. I activated it and fun girl reappeared. She would then go out into the world to search for her sister Ichiko saikou. She took the machine with her to hide it, so Saishou Saikou would not get it.

Sumire Saitozaki was friendly to me, but was severely psychologically damaged and still wanted my mother dead so badly. I told her again, no, please don't become like her, that convinced her to no be too brash. Sumire also hated her own parents for not knowing what had happened, but not as intensely anymore.

I saw how jaded, bitter and world-weary Sumire was. World weary- that was how I felt at the time too. Oh Headmaster, this is how you felt like all the time…

Knowing the horrid truth and having to arrest HER, I did not always know really how to carry on, but did so nonetheless. Giving up is not what I would do. For me, for Father, for my friends and for Sumire, needed to carry on. I sent Sumire Saitozaki to her parents and I think they did not see it coming. I can't describe how they reacted, they were so glad to have her back and never expected anything like this to ever happen. Sumire Saitozaki was much better now. She then spent most of her time with her ageing parents.

At first she wanted to be very angry at them for believing that Ryoba was innocent, but when she saw her reactions at seeing her, the lost daughter, again, that thought was gone forever. Her Parents were simply victims of Ryoba too.

Sumire Saitozaki also reunited with my father and told him her story, and while they will not pursue a romantic relationship, they will talk a lot about the good old times and cry together.

Now father knows that I somehow revived Sumire, but whatever, I had to do it, I think…to save Sumire Saitozaki from pain and to undo my mother's actions…

Joho chan found out about Sumire Saitozaki, but keeps it a secret. Joho also admires me a lot , after I built the new body for Sumire Saitozaki, because she admires people "who can do things I could never pull of".

We have stuck an amazing alliance, Joho chan has also a secretly Alias known as Info chan, a dirty hacker who sells information to the highest bidder. But she hasn´t been acting nearly as vicious as in the past anymore, because she had no need to do so, since her newspapers sold so well ,after all the commotion I had caused (the mecha incident, the occult incident, my drawings and so on…It was amazing fuel for her newspapers). She also felt guilty about using her Father, the journalist as bait for HER. And she does not bear her nasty smirk on her face anymore. That is one of the best things, now she smiles genuinely.

Don't forget the fact that we helped each other a lot.

So I can stand her despite everything she did , she can stand me despite being descended from yanderes so we are fine. Anyways, I have the brawns and executive strength, and Joho can provide me with all the information(her app is amazing and she has all the students information), I intend to use this all for the best.

The headmaster no longer hates me, Joho chan likes me, and Father is relived to be liberated from HER. Poor father, he is still struggling and afraid to talk to other women, because of what had happened in the past. We all cried, mourning the lost time and needed to recover. We would recover, if ever so slowly.

I think arresting HER has brought us all closer together, which is ironic…

Then Fun girl returned to Akademi together with Ichiko Saikou and had a long talk with Megami Saikou.

Fun girl also was the one who helped me get acquainted to Megami Saikou.

Apparently Megami Saikou was oppressed by her parents, never had a good childhood and was drilled brutally and even had to kill her pet hamster, she was resentful of her parents and Megami Saikou, Ichiko Saikou and Fungirl/Tanoshi saikou went to the very old Saishou saikou, who died of a heart attack, when he saw Tanoshi Saikou. And Ichirou Saikou was defeated by the three Saikous somehow. I don´t know the specifics, but it must have been wild…

The evil Saikous had horrific plans indeed. Tanoshii Saikou told me all about them. Saishou saikou had employed my mother as an assassin(ARGH WHAT THE FUCK; so these were some of the murders in our area which stopped only recently, Saishou Saikou wanted to eliminate all his opponents and rivals, sounds like Aishi behaviour), but when she got caught by us, he did not do anything, because he thought, if she is that incompetent, she can be expended. He and Ichirou Saikou also had a deal with the schools headmaster, that if I go full yandere and murder people, and do not get caught, it would be a necessary sacrifice so I could learnhow to murder, and they could employ me as an assassin in the future. DISGUSTING PYSCHO! YOU SICK FUCK!

Also Megami got Aishi genes from my mother via gene editing, but luckily they did only make her smart and gave her insanely good fine motor control, and did not cause her to go amok. Megami Saikou is just like me in that regard. She also wants to always do something and achieve thing like I always do. Oh and our hate and disgust for the yandere madness is also something we have in common.

Ugh, the evil Saikous plans went much further, they also wanted to use more gene editing to create Superhumans that would enslave the inferior normal people, Saishou Saikou originally wanted to have Japan reach world domination but scrapped this plan because he got customers for his devices all over the world. But nonetheless he is evil and wants to brutally drill his descendants into becoming the perfect CEO of his company…

Now the Saikou corp is controlled by Tanoshi Saikou, Ichiko Saikou and Megami saikou.

The evil Aishis, and the evil Saikous are defeated. Kencho Saikou is just existing somewhere, without the ability to do anything about it. Maybe the good Saikous will somehow keep him occupied so he won´t bother them?

Megami Saikou apologized to me for previously hating me , when she did not know that I wasn't a crazy yandere, and I forgave her. I know how she views my family and why. I almost think the same way as her, but I think if you are victim of the curse and know no better, as long as you haven't hurt anyone yet, you should be saved and prevented from harming anyone. If a curse afflicted person already murdered someone, you need to make that person harmless without hesitation , but if the that person did not know any better or regrets her actions, she should not get needlessly trampled on by other people. How desperate a curse afflicted person must be to murder someone…

It was great to have Megami Saikou not hate me any longer! Now that she is no longer hostile I can finally see her good sides. Unlike me she is a universal genius who can do all sorts of things, not just martial arts, science activities and cooking, but stuff like acting and making music too. I respect her for being very disciplined, I always thought that I was one of the most disciplined people, but that was before I learned of how disciplined she really is. She is a serious no bullshit person and very mature. Actually one of the reasons for her success is that she usually does fewer things than other people, but those few she does almost all of the time with a high intensity. This means that she does not waste her time with things she finds unimportant, but focuses on the main things which she finds the most important. This way she is very effective. Interestingly I do things similarly to her, I also focus mainly on reading, science and martials arts. Megami Saikous amazing discipline is also a by-product of her good habits, she has set up her life in ways that make it very easy for her to follow up on her good habits.

She is also much more confident and intimidating than I could ever be, but if my loved ones are in danger, or I get seriously threatened, I can probably be intimidating too. I don´t want to have to resort to drastic measures though. Megami Saikou is really powerful and competent for sure…

I feel honoured to be respected by such a strong and competent person… I need to make sure to never get on her bad side, not that I ever intend to do that anyway…

Also Megami Saikou cares for school, science, family, justice and money and hates memes and gossip, so now I can get along with her very well.

Joho chan hated Megami Saikou , but that was before she knew that Megami Saikou is not on the Side of the evil Saikous, now she still has a distaste for her, but does not plan do anything against her. This is good.

Megami Saikou needs to understand the value of compassion and of not being too strict I think. Hopefully her Family, the good Saikous Ichiko and Tanoshi Saikou, can teach her that. With how smart and mature she is, I think this will be possible.

Megami Saikou even invited me to join the student council (she regards me highly, and thinks I'm one of the best people and therefore suited to be a member of the students council), and I was flabbergasted at first, but then I declined it in the most polite way possible, because I my place is still in the science club. However I made clear that I was considering it, which is the truth.

For a while things were very, very calm, but not for long.

Then I was terrified when I remembered that there was an Aishi cousin and an aunt too. We did our research and decided to contact them. My Aunt was very angry that her sister - my Mother failed, and wanted to blame me for that, but I told her that that my mother sadly fucked things up and I had to do it, and that I really wanted to save her from her fate, but failed to do so, and the upset I feel is genuine! I told her that I wanted to help my cousin to get her senpai with modern methods, because the modern world is more dangerous than ever for an Aishi, and she bought my story! At least she is very protective and family oriented like I am, and I really respect her for that. However I really don't want to know how she got her Senpai…

I talked to my cousin and knew that she was more severely afflicted by the Aishi curse than I ever was, but I convinced her to eliminate her rivals peacefully if it ever became a necessity, and warned her that violent methods would backfire in today's age. I think she does not really comprehend why it is morally better to use peaceful elimination methods, but she will do so, because she knows it is better for her.

I tried to get her to understand Fathers lessons as much as possible and just hoped it would be enough. We read the manga Retribution* together and watched the anime. Retribution is actually one of my favourite Stories, it always fascinated me how much it hurts people if their loved ones die and how angry and sad they will get. The story always scares me just as much as it fascinates me..

I told her that other people do not only care about their children and senpai ,but also for many other people, and she has understood it. She has been very fascinated by the Story too and even showed some concern, and said that she does have the very strong desire to protect her family, including me, her cousin. So there is hope. Oh my dear cousin, you are very much like me in this regard, and I think if anyone hurt our family we would become very violent, maybe even more so than Nemesis…better not think about that too long…

Then when I was at Akademi I was lost in thought and bumped into Senpai – and almost went full yandere mad crazy like my mother. EXACTLY LIKE MOTHER! GAAAH! It was like nothing else but getting Senpai mattered, like I needed to kill and hurt these DISGUSTING rivals who wanted to STEAL my precious senpai from me, no matter the atrocious things I would have to do, I almost forgot family and friends….-

-but I caught myself, remembered the Horrors that Sumire chan recounted (Mother said to her "He belongs to me, You can't have him"…and murdered her cruelly…and laughed!), but also all the good things, Father´s smile and the Kurusu sisters, the science club and the cooking club and Raibaru Fumetsu and Osana chan, Joho chan, Megami Saikou regarding me highly and all the trust people have placed in me and many more things and I ran to the cherry tree and said the magical words:

"I don't even need a senpai. Who wants a senpai anyway? I don't care who senpai is dating. Senpai can do whatever he wants. I want senpai to be happy."

It worked and I went back to normal, I went to Taro Yamada and he did not affect me in any way anymore! It is for the better. I also put of the protective necklace I had worn against the curse for a long time and was really happy.

I´m lying here on a bench and am smiling and feel high as a kite like they would say. It's almost like I have the "Senpai effect" on me all the time. These colours are so vivid. Guess my brain is not used to being flooded with all those neurotransmitters and hormones. It will wear off soon, but it is really weird…I can´t focus well in class and am always smiling like I am drugged… Also by now my eyes are shiny like fathers and I am no longer pale like in the past! I won´t be regarded as creepy anymore!

The effects wore off soon indeed, but I was crazy for a while. Now I could enjoy, art, music, nature, gardening and this stuff, just like Osana chan and similar people ! However science and cooking are still my favourites. When I saw Oka chan, I got creeped out a little by her for a short moment, because of her dark outfit, but even though now I get scared by demons a bit, I still like the occult and stay myself.

During autumn and winter I recovered from the horrible chaos that mother had brought upon us, crafted more mechas, drones, helped Horo guramu a bit with his technology, and talked to Kaga kusha a bit, spend lots of time with Yaku zaishi, finally got to the point where I could feat Raibaru chan about half the time, and I saw how Oka chan improved her martial arts skills, nowadays she is fairly strong and even made some friends in the martial arts club. Juku Ren (He likes martial arts, reading and solitude, dislikes gossip and friends) and Budo Masuta (he likes Occult and Martial Arts) to be precise.

Amai Odayaka needed my help, a rival bakery was endangering her family's bakery, I gave her some ideas how to improve her business, and she implemented most of them, and her families business eventually recovered.

Then that red eyed blue haired guy got bullied, because he had broken his arm and the Bullies thought he was weak, I gripped their arms tightly and used my mother's smile and told the bullies to leave him alone or they would needlessly endanger their health. I realised that I had imitated mother and decided to never do something like this again, because I don't want her actions repeated IN ANY way. Or at least I want to avoid to resort to threatening people, if I can help it in any way. I and Father now finally decided to retake the family name Yudasei, so we would no longer be Aishis. This was great, father always wanted the Aishi lineage to be ended, and I always wanted the curse to be broken, this curse was so horrible.

I had told father about how I broke the curse and he was so glad I did, and he likes how my eyes shine nowadays.

The red eyed, blue haired guy - Gaku Hikitsuri followed me around like a baby duckling for a while, and I let him. Bullying isn't something to be underestimated (even if some dumb adults think so) and he needs protection.

Th bullies reduced their bullying significantly, but never stopped, so I sent student council members onto them, namely Aoi Ryugoku (she is fierce) and Megami Saikou(same thing, but Megami is someone you really never, ever want to piss off), that was an experience, apparently they were suspended for several weeks, and from what we know Mususme Ronshaku cried to her father, but after seeing the overwhelming evidence, he would no longer let her get her way, so she had to change, and now she is less of a pain in the ass. The bullies are less active now. Geat, they really had it coming!

Then Osoro Shidesu beat up her enemies from Shisuta town, got some scars in the process and got a torn uniform as trophy from the enemy. The five bullied students flocked to her like goslings to their mother, for protection, I know it, and they started dying their hair blonde, imitated her manners, carried around weapons, but they would not get themselves scars or go too late to class. The other Students still feared them and called the "the delinquents", but they are not really as bad as you think, and the one of them form my class is even friendly to me since I tried to help him. Gaku Hikitsuri- to be precise.

Sakyu and Inkyu basu wanted to revive their demonic ancestor, turns out they are descended from demons, so Oka chan was right in a way. Luckily they failed, because the demon was the one who curse the first Aishis and was obviously extremely evil. The Basu sisters will never know about the machine that brought back Tanoshi Saikou and which could bring back this demon too.

Then one night I had a strange dream.

I stood in the void and I saw…THAT MONSTER AGAIN! FUCK YOU!…

I know who I am and I think that Aishi doesn´t only stand for love and death (愛死), it also stand for love and determination!(愛志)

Mother is the one who got the family name wrong!

And in truth I am more a Yudasei than an Asihi.

What do I do now…

And I know…. I wanted to deny it desperately… but I have her darkness inside myself too. I … am a monster too….

But isn´t everyone a monster, a beast deep inside? Doesn't everyone have dark desires and passions inside? Doesn't everyone has a potential for violence deep inside themselves? We all aren't so different form each other. Chimpanzees are vile and nasty creatures, Beasts kill and murder all the time. Humans are not an exception. I know that Joho chan did not care much for people and would not have hesitated to hurt them seriously in the past, although she is better now. I know that many bullied students hate the bullies with a passion and would be glad to be rid of them. There are so many criminals in the wold.

Heck, even poor, poor Sumire Saitozaki hates my mother with a burning passion and would like to kill her!

But there is something, and something indeed, that separates Man from Monster. That is the Awareness of ones darkest desires, and the ability to remember oneself and channel the dark urges and impulses into something harmless instead of hurting People. To remember and remind oneself of ones humanity. Never to give in to those urges and always protect family and friends and those who need it. To always strive to choose good over bad.

That is indeed, what separates good man from beasts and sub-men.

No matter how kind, no matter how gentle, no matter how sweet, we all have the darkness inside us. Some people, like me have more, some have less, but we all have it and we all need to learn how to manage it or we become monsters and ruin ourselves in the process.

I told all I knew to that monster and it looked at me in confusion. Then it dropped the bloodstained knife and went to its knees, sobbing.

Ugh seriously…WHAT?

"…I´m so lonely. *sniff!* I did not know what else to do!..."

This seemed so futile to me but I tried my best anyways.

"Ugh… I did hate you a lot…but now I understand you…

You can get love, if you stop hurting people. Can you promise me?"

"I… want to …but I need senpai…please…you can't!..."

"We don´t need senpai anymore. We were fascinated with him because he acts and looks like father a lot. We got other people to love and Yaku-kun. Come here, I can hug you. We don´t need senpai anymore. Remember how I broke the curse?"

She looked like she was going to get angry as I said that we don´t need senpai anymore but restrained herself. I hugged her and it felt good.

Then I said these magical words "I don't even need a senpai. Who wants a senpai anyway? I don't care who senpai is dating. Senpai can do whatever he wants. I want senpai to be happy."

"I´ve got friends, a father and Yaku-kun anyways and am happy to have them."

The other part, the shadow me looked wistfully and said "Senpai …no.. wait…

…

Okay… I will let ….senpai … go…" and burst out crying again. "I don´t want to be alone….it is so hard… but I need to let him go…"

"Thank you! It means the world to me! I can´t express my gratitude enough! Remember, as long as you can restrain yourself and behave, you will always be welcome in my heart."

Mother, I know why you did what you did…that passion of obsessive Love…but you haven´t remembered yourself and let yourself become the monster you shouldn´t have become. Oh if only you had done it differently….

After the dream I was psychological far more stable than before. I had finally achieved self-acceptance and the self-loathing I felt for the longest time had finally gone away. This calm feeling feels so good!

I looked Oka with my aura vison and she no longer appeared read in any way, just green like it was always supposed to be. Taro Yamada is fully green now too.

Things were looking up.

Authors Notes:

*the Anime and Manga "retribution" in this fictional iniverse is mostly a combination of "Hanako's Crumbling Dream - Yandere Simulator MV" (minus the immediate killing part at the end) found on Youtube and the Yandere simulator comic "retribution".

Basically evil Yandere Chan kills Hanako chans brother, Hanako chan becomes Nemesis and captures Yandere chan and then they fight and then they get together and capture Info chan and torture her to death and then they kill each other in a prolonged brutal battle. A dark and messy story.