"Why don't you ask your brother?" Valerie asked as she tried to put on her nail polish.

"Because I don't want to put Brandon in this situation. He's mad at him," Brenda replied.

"I'm mad at him too," Valerie said.

"Yes but you are better at these things and then you did it very well already once"

"Yes but it was tiring"

Brenda's silence made Valerie guess that she would not accept a no as an answer.

"I'm furious with him, believe me, and I'm not going to go back, but he just came out of a horrible period, and as much as I hate to admit it I continue to worry about him. I just want to know if he's okay."

"Brenda... I have no problem doing this kind of 'favor' but I want to understand what it's useful to you."

"I don't know, I'm going around the world for the next six months"

"Always the usual lucky one"

Brenda chuckled "as I told you and as you can see I certainly don't want to go back... for me the story is over, but I need to know that he's fine."

"Why? What do you care? He had asked you to go live together and then he pulled back like a coward"

Brenda knew Valerie was right but she just couldn't help it.

Before leaving she needed answers, indeed only one answer and hated herself for it.

"Okay, let's change the subject.. tell me what's new, how's it going with David?"

"Inexplicably it's very good" Valerie laughed at her own irony "the after dark is fine just because we're a great team" Valerie took a few seconds off "we're the only ones doing well"

"What do you mean?"

"Steve and Clare broke up"

"What? Why?"

"There was a problem between Steve and the canchellor , let's say steve wanted to attend a conference without clothes..."

"Wait ... what do you mean?"

"That he showed up naked along with those of the Keg creating a considerable embarrassment for the chancellor... and so he wanted the head of the creator of this antics that was Steve"

Brenda listened amused and Valerie continued her story "the chancellor requested David the record"

"And did David give it to him?"

"Mmmhhh yes and no.., steve begged him and you know how David is.. he delivered a totally ruined cassette... and Steve seemed safe"

"But he wasn't safe..."

"No... it seems that for Clare, the father is absolutely untouchable, it was she in person who told her that Steve was the one "

"Steve apologized, his mother went to talk to the chancellor... And Steve had a softer sentence.. he will have to attend summer courses with compulsory social work for three weeks.."

"But he didn't forgive Clare," Brenda said

"No at all, now she cleans the University garden and doesn't speak to her."

"Donna, how is she ?"

"Donna now goes out with a guy, a cute, nice guy, a football player, his name is Joe... and Ray didn't take it well.. he haunts her a little.. Donna says she can keep him at bay, that she can control him, but in my opinion it's more dangerous than she might think, I recognize her dangerous people."

"And apparently you know Ray very well"

"Damn I hate to have this confidence in you, but I had to tell someone.."

"To me and your friend Ginger.."

"That's true, but Ginger is in Buffalo... if David came to know something like that for us it would be the end"

"You weren't even together when the thing happened with Ray"

"No, but he was Donna's boyfriend and David is particularly protective when it comes to her a bit like Dylan..." Valerie moved her lip. Brenda felt a squeeze in her heart but tried to avoid it."

"Can I ask you something, Brenda?"

"Of course"

"Have you told Daniel that you know what happened between him and me?"

"Yes, but he never guessed how I came to know"

"And now between you and him how is the situation?"

"As it was before..."

" before all?'

"Very before of all... we're friends, I'd say, he took all his stuff from my apartment, I'll see him in class... but we'll leave together for this tour"

"Maybe I'm the least suitable person to tell you and I don't know exactly how it's going to end up with Dylan..."

"It's already over with Dylan"

Valerie smiled, no it wasn't over if you still ask me about him.

"Anyway," said Valerie, "as far as it's worth saying by me... Daniel really loves you."

Brenda didn't answer.

"What about Brandon?" She asked Brenda to divert the speech.

"How long have you been hearing from your brother?"

"For a while"

"He gave up on Chicago Chronical"

'What?'

"Yes.. it's the most absurd thing is that he gave up for Miss Kelly Taylor.. they had arranged a trip together.. something like that, and she was so excited. If it weren't for Kelly leaving for New York this summer and without your brother"

"New York?"

"To do photo shoots and try a modeling career"

"The Spring princess is still the spring princess"

"Yes..." Valerie's tone became more serious "but it's not the most serious thing"

"And what is it?"

"You know I really enjoy reading Reveal"

"The Gossip Weekly"

"Mmmhh" Valerie continued to be sibylline.

'So?' Brenda Asked.

"This morning there was a picture of Kelly Taylor and Colin Robbins kissing in Los Angeles"

"What? Wait a minute who is Colin Robbins?"

"He's a painter, a fashion photographer...it seems like a few weeks ago he was the one who auditioned Kelly for Vogue... and the same evening they were kissing.. a photographer was there... Kelly Taylor never changes."

Brenda was shocked.

She couldn't speak.

"But... Brandon..."

"Poor... it had already been hard because it had been so stupid to give up the Chicago Chronical for the summer... and then that too"

'Why?' Brenda asked, "did you see the picture?"

"I showed it to him less than an hour ago.. and now he's going straight to Kelly's house..."

Brenda was worried, Kelly had promised her that she would not hurt her brother and instead at the first opportunity..

"Please Valerie, can you let me know when Brandon gets home? I'd like to talk to him."

"I don't think he's going to want to talk"

Beach house

Brandon parked in front of the house on the beach and stood a few minutes to look at it.

In the front seat was Valerie's stupid newspaper open on the page with the photo of Kelly and this guy, Colin. They kiss, it's obvious.

Under the headline "new blonde flame for photographer Robbins".

Brandon was furious, he was furious at this photograph, because she hadn't told him about it, because she had insisted on that trip they would never make. Because he had given up his opportunity and a person like him, with the goals he has, does not make these kinds of mistakes.

They had spent a year together, a year in which he had totally dedicated himself to her, had supported her in every possible way, had stayed by her side, had tried to help her, and what had he gotten in return?

He felt like crying and he didn't even know why.

She would have liked to talk to Brenda or Dylan about it. He imagined that they would welcome him into their house, listen and maybe give the right advice, make him calm down, and instead Brenda had gone back to the other side of the ocean and Dylan doesn't know where he disappeared.

He had tried to go to his house even though he hadn't told Brenda and he hadn't told her because he wasn't sure what he wanted to do either, whether to punch him or ask him questions about why he enjoyed making his sister his favorite punchball. What they had done to these people to be treated this way.

Anger was enveloping him, he knew he would say or do the wrong thing but he didn't care, he was fed up with the right thing, trying to be understanding, solving problems.

Brandon grabbed the newspaper and got out of the car.

He knocked on the door, waited a few seconds looking at the ocean.

He was mixing ideas, feelings, feeling that he was not lucid, he would probably do or say something extremely wrong.

Kelly opened the door with a wonderful smile and owes him a few cracks in his heart.

"Hei," Kelly said as she approached him to kiss him on the lips.

Brandon didn't make her understand anything but that kiss reminded him of the photograph, the newspaper, Valerie's face showing it to him. It caused him disgust.

"I wasn't expecting you, I thought I'd see you at CU," Kelly said, turning her back on Brandon, "I'm choosing clothes to take to New York," she said as soon as she checked Brandon's reaction.

He was a marble wall. He didn't show any feeling but inside he felt himself dying.

Kelly sensed something "Listen I'm sorry for the Chicago Chronical but you hadn't even told me about it... and I found this New York thing in my hands, no one gives up such an opportunity, we talked about it. There are still possibilities for you, there is Boston and so we will be close"

Brandon didn't answer and Kelly walked over again to kiss him.

Brandon pulled his face away.

"Okay if you want to be angry that's fine, that's right, do you want me to give up? Is that what you want?"

"I never asked you," Brandon replied.

"Tell me what I can do so that this story doesn't ruin us"

Brandon took a few steps around her. Then he opened the newspaper on the photo of her and that guy Colin.

"Start explaining this to me"

Kelly saw the photograph and then immediately looked at Brandon.

"It's not what it's written"

"So how is it?" He asked, barely keeping his anger.

Kelly couldn't think quickly, explain how that kiss had taken her off guard and that she certainly wasn't Colin Robbins' new blond love.

Brandon was out of controle.

"You're a joke ... what is Kelly I haven't been close enough to you? What did you miss Kelly? What are you going to do behind my back? What's your problem Kelly? Is the sex not sufficiently satisfying? What did I do to deserve this?"

Kelly felt the tears wet her eyes.

"I don' know why I'm so surprised... after all, that's what you've been doing behind my sister's back for months. Maybe Steve was right when he put around that gossip about you..." Brandon said it in a low voice then approached her face "have fun with your friend in New York"

Kelly was devastated, she didn't have the strength to say anything. She let him get out of her room and her life that way. On the doorstep of a new summer.

Brandon ran into the car, he felt that despair or something else was coming from his bowels, he would never think he would get to say certain things, things he didn't even think. Anger had totally blinded him and lit his mouth. He was scared as he drove he felt he had to go back, to her, what he was doing. He couldn't forget her look, sad and couldn't say a single word as he spilled everything on her.

He Parked in the driveway of the Walsh house.

Jim was waiting for him with a note in his hand.

"He called the Boston globe" he told him looking at him with a smile .

Brandon couldn't say anything. He took the piece of paper his father held in his hands, Jim and Cindy looked at him with a proud look as he felt like a monster.

Rehab.

"What I don't understand is why you let her go that way," Antonia said, "You were impressed by what that Randolph said."

"It's not like that," Dylan said, Brenda's thought was consuming him every single day.

Antonia picked up the phone "call her" and said "at least ask her what she wants to do with her life, don't decide for her. Call Brenda. "

"You don't understand," Dylan replied, putting down the phone that Antonia was holding in her hands.

"What I don't understand..."

"I saw it.." Dylan said.

What do you mean by 'I saw it?'

"That night, at that Indian ceremony, I saw my and Brenda's future, I saw her crying... I saw her hating me and I saw..."

Antonia couldn't understand.

"A kind of look into the future?"

"A species, but it was real"

Antonia thought a little "maybe that's what you think you've seen"

Dylan looked at her without saying anything.

"I mean... that you don't know exactly what you've seen.. you only remember small pieces, not the whole movie, it might all be different, you're wandering in the dark"

Dylan had no reaction

"Dylan, you gave up everything... and you came to lock yourself in here.. but you've been clean for months, you're just scared"

"I saw my death"

"You can't know"

"Yes, I know"

Antonia thought about it for a moment and then said the simplest thing of all "you should come back there and really see what those images indicated, if it was a dream, a future life, a past life, you don't know a damn thing about what you've seen and you're making decisions that are forever changing your life and your happiness. Are you determined to know? I'll come with you," Antonia replied.

"Do you want to go back to the lake?"

"The question is, do you want to go back to the lake?" Antonia was staring at him with her big blue eyes.

Dylan didn't know what to answer.

Did he really want to see what was beyond that border that had caused him pain?

next chapters Dylan' s dream