"Mr Lawson?"
Eddie's head turned to see a nurse stood in front of him, a kind smile on her face.
"Miss Mason is awake, you can go and see her" she confirmed
Eddie sighed in relief.
"Is she ok?" He asked
"She's… as can be expected. She has suffered a miscarriage, as we suspected. She has an infection, which is under control. She'll need to stay in for a few days so we can monitor her"
Eddie nodded, sighing painfully.
"If you'll follow me, I can take you to see her" the Nurse offered
He stood up abruptly, following the Nurse down the corridor.
When he stepped into the little hospital cubicle, the sight before him almost caused him to break down.
Rachel was on the bed, knees drawn up to her chest. An IV was protruding out of her arm, pumping antibiotics into her system. Her head was resting on top of her knees, her glassy, tearful eyes staring blankly at the bedsheets. She looked broken.
She could feel Eddie's eyes burning into her own. She couldn't face him, it was too painful. Her heart was screaming in pain. She felt hollow, empty and numb. It felt like someone had ripped her heart from her chest and stomped on it relentlessly before shoving it back inside her. She wanted nothing more than to curl up into a ball, close her eyes and never wake up. The pain she felt physically and emotionally was overwhelming. It felt so easy to slip into the darkness, to just slip away from everyone and everything.
Eddie sat beside her on the bed carefully. He sighed painfully as she refused to look him in the eye.
"Rach?" Eddie whispered, placing a hand on her arm
She shrugged him off, turning her head in the other direction.
"Rachel, talk to me, please?" He pleaded
She shook her head
"I know you're upset darling, believe me, I know. But we need to talk about this, I need to know how you're feeling" he reasoned
"I'm not upset" she mumbled
Eddie frowned. He hadn't been expecting her to say that.
"What do you mean?" He asked
She turned her head, locking eyes with him.
"I'm not upset" she repeated
Her lips said one thing, but her eyes said another. The tears in her eyes told him she was upset, her words told him she was trying to hold up a front.
"Rach, you don't have to pretend everything is fine. Not with me, you know that" he insisted
"Eddie, I'm not upset. I'm fine" she huffed
"Really?" He questioned, raising an eyebrow
She nodded, a fresh set of tears forming in her eyes.
Eddie tucked her hair back behind her ear gently. That was all it took for her to break down. She burst into tears, her body shaking with sobs. Eddie pulled her into his embrace carefully, holding her tightly as she wept.
"I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry!" She wailed, her body trembling
Eddie pulled apart from her so he was looking into her eyes.
"You have nothing to apologise for, Rach. Do you hear me? Nothing" he reassured
She shook her head frantically
"I failed you, I failed our baby! They died because of me! I believed that stupid pregnancy test I took last month was right! I'm so stupid!" She cried
"Rachel, you listen to me, ok? You haven't failed me, or the baby! Sweetheart, these things happen. It's awful and heartbreaking, but they happen. Who knows why. But it is not your fault! Do you hear me?" He argued
She sobbed even louder. Eddie couldn't stop his own tears from falling. He pulled her back into his arms, resting his chin on her head. None of this was her fault.
"I don't understand it" she whimpered
"What don't you understand, love?" Eddie questioned gently
"How can I be upset about losing something I never knew I had? I don't have a right to be grieving do I? I-I didn't even know I was pregnant! Or maybe I did, I don't know. But how did I not know? What kind of Mother doesn't know they're pregnant, Eddie?" She blurted
"Rach, listen. You have every right to be upset, whether you knew or not. It doesn't matter. You had a baby growing inside of you and you lost them, you're grieving, and that's ok. I didn't know anymore than you did, Rach"
"Am I ever going to be a Mother, Eddie?What if this was our last chance?" she sobbed
"Hey, hey. Come here" he soothed, hugging her tightly
"Listen to me, Rach. This wasn't your last chance. I know it feels like it is, but it isn't. When you're ready, and if you want to, we'll try again. We'll do whatever it takes, ok? But for now, you need to recover and rest"
She nodded, wiping her tears
"I love you" she whispered
"I love you too" he replied
"We'll get through this together, Rach, ok? I'm not going anywhere"
The end.
A/N: Hope you all enjoyed! Please review and let me know what you think! :)