Fate Grand Order is the creation and intellectual property of Nasu Kinoko and Type-Moon.
Looney Tunes is the creation and intellectual property of Warner Brothers.
Still Better than Black Keys.
Chapter One Hundred Forty Nine.
Assassin.
True Name: Bugs Bunny.
Other Names and Aliases: Wascally Wabbit, Happy Hare, Big Chungus, Serapio.
Gender: Male.
Alignment: Chaotic Good.
Attribute: Earth.
Natural Enemy: Daffy Duck, Mickey Mouse, Elmer Fudd, Wile E. Coyote, Theodore Taz, Yosemite Sam, Marvin the Martian, Witch Hazel.
Likes: Carrots.
Hates: Disney.
Parameters:
Strength: D
Endurance: EX
Agility: A+
Mana: C
Luck: EX
Noble Phantasm: A++
Biography:
Bugs Bunny's life started the day he was born, which goes without saying; but, even in the hospital the day he arrived, he knew he was different from the other kids. He couldn't figure out why at first; then, suddenly, it came to him— He was a rabbit in a human world!
His parents gave him a toy piano to play with. and I took to it right away, starting his infatuation with the scene arts. When he was a little older, he was sent to dancing school. At school recitals, he was always selected to demonstrate various dances.
After graduation, he was ready for the big time. And offers poured in! After much consideration, Bugs finally accepted an
important part in the hit show 'Girl of the Golden Vest' singing the popular song:
Oh, we are the boys of the chorus. We hope you like our show. We know you're rootin' for us, but now we have to go...
Then came, 'Wearing of the Grin', with this immortal piece:
Oh, we are the boys of the chorus. We hope you like our show. We know you're rootin' for us, but now we have to go...
Then he starred in 'My Big Smash, Rosie's cheeks', where he sang the unforgettable
Oh, we are the boys of the chorus. We hope you like our show. We know you're rootin' for us, but now we have to go...
For some reason, Bugs' career hit a stagnation point around that time. It was 1938, and things were tough that year. A lot of actors were out of work.
However, Bugs met Elmer Fudd, the big vaudeville star. He was looking for a partner for his act. After several hits together, Bugs was given equal billing with Elmer, and soon he became a super star in his own right.
Now, hitting the stage in Fate Grand Order, Bugs has joined the cast as Servant Assassin, delighting us along Elisabeth Bathory and Nero Claudius Augustus in their masterful rendering of
Oh, we are the boys of the chorus. We hope you like our show. We know you're rootin' for us, but now we have to go...
Class Skills:
Presence Concealment: A
Assassin can appear from almost anywhere to surprise his enemies. This generally manifests in the form of Assassin showing up from a nearby hole in the ground, one that was not there seconds ago.
Even when engaging into casual talk with his targets, as long as he approaches them from behind, Assassin won't cause an immediate reaction from them. He will keep on asking questions that they will answer while keeping on doing whatever was keeping them busy until that moment, until Assassin decides to strike at them.
Personal Skills:
Duck Season, Rabbit Season: A++
A form of mental manipulation meant to wreck confusion and befuddlement across Assasin's enemies.
Entering a verbal dispute with Assassin is a folly of the highest level. Assassin will invariably lead anyone arguing with him into making fools out of themselves, eventually ending up with them agreeing with him without realizing it. Not even Eye of the Mind or Willpower are guaranteed to overcome this.
Once engaged in discussion with Assassin, the enemy will be compelled to not stop, instead growing angrier and more frustrated until they lose sight of what they are saying, and Assassin will use this to make them agree with whatever he wants. Realization of this will only be reached once Assassin has achieved his goals. It is not much different from most Internet, online discussions.
A variant of this comes from Assassin being able to fake his death so convincingly, with so much melodramatic panache, that even enemies deadset on murdering him moments ago will desperately moun him and declare being willing to do anything to have him back- something that Assassin will be too glad to exploit.
ACME Arsenal: A
Also known as Hammerspace.
The ability to pull out stored weapons and other assorted objects from a dimensional pocket. Unlike Gate of Babylon, Assassin can decide what he is going to pull out at any given time, apparently through a mental command.
The items Assassin can access to through this skill include:
A large mallet.
Super Speed pills giving Assassin EX ranked speed equal to the Road Runner's for bursts lasting five minutes. These pills cannot be consumed by non-Servant humans or they will explode. Any Servant other than Assassin who swallows them will suffer heavy flatulence and receive no upgrades.
Large round black bombs.
Many sticks of ACME dynamite.
Anvils to drop on the enemy's head.
A baseball slugger bat.
Unlike the similar skill granted to a certain crafty coyote, all the ACME items allowed to Assassin will work perfectly.
The most useful, although mundane looking, application of this skill comes in the form of carrots Assassin can pull out of thin air and chew on. The exact origin of these carrots is unknown, but it's likely they come from another dimensional plane, thus making Assassin an unknowing or perhaps just uncaring user of the Fifth Magic. Each carrot eaten restores a small quantity of spent mana without any need of input from the Master.
Master of Disguise: A
Assassin is an expert in disguising himself, mostly as stunningly sensual women. These disguises and costumes will fool anyone but Servants with A ranked or above Eye of the Mind, or other rabbits. They can be used to impersonate others, throw enemies off balance, simply seduce them, getting them to lower their guard, or escape, aiding Assassin's Disengage (see below).
If Assassin's white cotton tail is spotted through his current disguise, it will stop working on whoever saw said tail, and that person cannot be fooled by the same disguise again.
Disengage: B
Assassin is extremely slippery and fast on his feet. He can think quickly and most escapes are feasible when he is given enough of a head away. Oddly enough, this skill is mostly inefficient against tortoises or Servants with tortoise traits. It's also mostly ineffective against conventionally unattractive females who want to get into Assassin's inexistent pants.
Noble Phantasms:
Super Rabbit: A
Target: Self.
Through subspace (see ACME Arsenal) Assassin pulls out a special, chemically treated carrot granting him temporary superpowers. He gains flight, EX ranked speed, A+ ranked strength, and a nifty red and blue super suit with a cape. Any bullets shot by any Heroic Spirits will merely bounce off his chest without hurting him in the slightest. He can jump over tall buildings, change the course of mighty rivers, and all that stuff.
The effects of the Noble Phantasm are restricted to fifteen minutes. It can only be used once per day.
Rabbit Rampage: EX
Anti-Unit.
Assassin's Reality Marble. It traps the enemy in a landscape of Assassin's own making for the duration of a cinematographic piece Assassin starred in life, that is, seven minutes. From its start to its end, Assassin can manipulate reality around the target any way he sees fit. He can change the target's size or weight, alter their appearance, subject them to humiliation and comical abuse, stretch and squash them, put them into deranged locations where they are attacked by the environment, or simply destroy them with weaponry storming on them.
To any outside observer, it will just look like Assassin is sitting at a drawing board, sketching a cartoon about the hilarious misadventures of his target.
Summon: "Eeehhh, what's up, Doc? What? Shocked? You don't think a cute lil' bunny wabbit like me can help you, eh? Well, tell ya what, wiseguy! Servant Assassin's gonna win this war here for ya just to prove ya wrong, Doc!"
Start of Battle:
"Nyyyeeeehhh, what's up, Doc?"
"I knew I shoulda taken that left turn at Albuquerque..."
"Waitaminnit! Dis sure doesn't look like Pismo Beach!"
"What's cookin', Doc?"
Attack:
"Poifect!"
"Hold on to your hats!"
"What a maroon!"
"What an ignoranimus!"
Damage:
"Was it somethin' I said?"
"Ooooffff!"
"Why, I oughtta!"
"Heh heh, you only get one, Doc!"
Damage by Noble Phantasm:
"Of course, you know dis means war!"
Victory:
"Ain't I a stinker?"
"An' that's the end!"
"Like a friend of mine would say, th-th-that's all, folks!"
"Bugs Bunny, King of the Beasts!" (Thumps on his chest and gives a Tarzan yell).
"Y'know, my conscience kinda bothers me sometimes... but not dis time!"
Defeat:
"Ya got me, Doc... Everything's gettin' dark... Dark..."
"Could it be I carried this thing too far...?"
"Hare today, gone tomorrow!"
"I only wanted to go to the Coachella Valley for the Big Carrot Festival!"
Noble Phantasm Activation:
"This looks like a job for... SUPER RABBIT!"
"Okay, Doc, now you got me steamed up! You coulda say... I'm ready for a Rabbit Rampage!"
Extra Dialogue:
"... one hundred. One hundred!? Doc, and they say people in my family multiply like rabbits! I can't imagine how yours will be! " (When you have Foreigner Aijo Rentarou).
"Ah, Daffy. Nice to meetcha again, yay. Say, are you playing the big galactic superhero again? I see..." (When you have Rider Duck Dodgers).
"(Gulp). The K-King! H-Hey, I brought the Singing Sword back, didn't I? You won't put me to the rack, burn me at the stake, and be-head me anymore, right!?" (When you have Saber Artoria Pendragon).
"Hiawatha! You sure have grown up, my boy! What? You ain't Hiawatha? Okay, sorry. Honest mistake there." (When you have Caster Geronimo).
"But if it's Elmer! My old best enemy, I mean pal! C'me here, Doc, let's shake 'em!" (They shake hands, Elmer is jolted by a hand buzzer). "Ah ha ha ha, still the same dumb ol' Elmer...!" (When you have Archer Elmer Fudd).
Birthday: "
"Happy birthday! Hey, why the long face? Feelin' old already? Look at me, I'm over eighty an' still feelin' young as ever!"
Event:
"Oboy, just look at dat! Sure looks like my kind of party!"
Holy Grail:
"Why should I bother with asking wishes from a cup? I'm pals with a genie, Doc!"
Oh, we are the boys of the chorus. We hope you like our show. We know you're rootin' for us, but now we have to go...
Next:
The 150th chapter! Celebrating a landmark event with a duo from the ever popular Digimon Adventure series!
Wait. It's a Digidestined and Digimon duo from Digimon 02 instead? Crap! Nobody but me likes Digimon 02!
To be Continued.