Chapter 53

Rory was looking out of the old white-framed gridded windows that she'd stared out of so many times before, both as a student and as a teacher at this place. She'd just moments ago glanced at the time for the tenth time. She'd just finished grading a stack of tests, to make good use of her time, as the students currently occupying her classroom were finishing an on-site essay on their take on freedom of speech. She'd used the same topic for years, knowing it generally offered everyone a decent amount of liberty to find their own angle, yet overlap with what they'd read for English class so far, and tick another box for using interdisciplinary learning methods in her civics class. With English being her first love, she never strayed too far from it, despite having not wanted to teach just the high school syllabus of books her entire life.

Rory had always loved the beginning of the school year. So much, in fact, that she preferred that to New Years Eve or Day, and considered it something to look forward to. A fresh beginning. A chance to start over. When she was younger she'd lied to her mother about the time school started just to get there early, and even later, in college, she'd wanted to be the first one to class to pick out the best seat. Sure, in time, she'd stopped with the extremes, but it still held enough value to her that she always got herself some nice new clothes, tidied up her laptop, purse, and notepads, and made sure she got a fresh haircut, changing up the windblown summary head of hair into something more conservative. She became the schoolyear Rory.

But this year, after the initial excitement of seeing her students again and doing all the things a fresh start involved, the excitement had worn off. Not even the cutest braid, her favorite sheath dress of the season and the best prepared class did it for her. She'd returned from Maine as a transformed person. No, not a new person, but definitely transformed. She recognized bits of her own former self, like the recognition of the familiar smell of home that she called her Hartford place or the feel and echo of the halls of Chilton. But in no scenario could she could deny that she didn't miss her much simpler way of life up in Maine, and that included Logan in a scary amount even if they'd never technically lived together. Being make-up free, being free of tights and bras, being herself 100 percent. Many would've argued those things were just small details, but they made up the pattern that made life worth living for her. What she did here in Hartford, was almost like what was expected of her and what she expected others to grade her on - like the difference between being in Stars Hollow, New Haven and at her grandparent's in Hartford - they'd all seen a different version of her.

Naturally, Logan and she had talked. They'd been making plans for Logan to come and visit and he was due in a week, his plans having gotten a little derailed until now due to getting his kids sorted out at their schools and helping out his sister on some new side venture. He always had a nose for business, but truthfully Rory found it still peculiar he hadn't gotten pulled back to his London tracks, not even the invite to get his award from the King had made him want that life back.

This was what they'd recently spent a lot of time talking about - Logan's future. What he wanted to do with his life once his kids were sorted out, if there ever was to be such a moment that is. But Logan didn't really have the answers right now - he was just idle. Waiting. Being in the present and in the moment. But that didn't mean they couldn't discuss possibilities - dreams, realities and ideas. Even if at this point, they mostly consisted of Logan's plans to renovate parts of the house to be more to his tastes rather than his sister's or trying out a pottery class. The thought of Logan's hands dipped in clay, shaping something behind a pottery wheel was surprisingly sexy to Rory's ears. Obviously, having gotten used to frequent sex over the summer was also causing Rory withdrawals.

Rory jumped slightly at her seat, having been caught off guard by the bell and having therefore left her students with an additional minute on their essays. She was fairly sure, at least a few had noticed her daydreaming.

"Alright, pencils down," Rory said, hurriedly, and began gathering up the essays. "See you all next week," she added. She knew she wasn't being her very best self that day, having considered earlier whether to call a couple of students over for a little chat about their progress. There was nothing overly dramatic, hence at this moment, she'd told herself it could likely wait until next week.

She packed the stack of essays into her bag, exhaling deeply and feeling mostly relief at the end of her day. It wasn't that she was never usually tired this time of day, on the contrary, whining to her colleagues about the struggles of a teacher's life including several sarcastic jokes was the thing to do, but she could just sense things being different for her. But at the end of the day, they all were lucky and conscious of that luck to be working at one of the finest schools in the US.

It was as if there was now a door to another kind of life open to her. She wasn't ready to step through that door, knowing her life held other complexities, but the door was open nonetheless, and for the life of her she hoped it'd stay open for a little while longer, giving her hope. If for nothing else, then for next summer.

She made her way down the elaborate main staircase, her hand sliding down the banister donated by Robert Frost. Her low heels clicked against the two hundred-year-old marble floor, as she headed to the teachers' lounge to get her coat and place her coffee cup in the washing machine.

Corinne was already waiting for her by the car, her nose in her phone, dressed in autumn colors - orange and brown - as it seemed to be in style these days.

Rory's car opened on her arrival, recognizing her, and the girl got in wordlessly. She wasn't mad at her, nor had they had a fight, this was just the end of a normal day. Both were tired, and eager to get home.

"Chinese or Thai tonight?" Rory asked, not needing to elaborate what she meant, once they were out of the parking lot. Unlike during the summer when she actually cooked a little, she was now in her work mode. Her daughter was no longer solely dependent on her cooking, which had once made her put in more of an effort to eat healthier around the house. Now at least 4-5 times a week Rory fell back on her mother's habits of pop tarts, take-away and their go-to diner down the street, which unfortunately didn't quite live up to Luke's in Rory's mind.

"Som Tam, Kai Ka Prow and Boba?" Corinne suggested.

"And Khao Soi for tomorrow?" Rory replied, knowing that it went without saying she'd add a couple of desserts as well, ignoring her daughter's roll of eyes at anything that sounded like a load of carbs. Corinne ate carbs alright, she just made sure to complain about it.

Rory handed over her phone to her daughter, trusting her to make the order so they wouldn't need to wait for the food for too long.

"Oh, and dad called. Just before you came out," Corinne announced as she finished up the food order, and placed the phone back on the middle console.

"And?" Rory replied, cautiously.

Rory both loved and hated the fact that Tucker had begun to communicate with her through their teenage daughter. Sometimes she even felt it had been a tactical approach - to annoy her, to emphasize how she was no longer needed in that triangle of a relationship, or to show how he was bitter with her, for going forward with her life.

"He wanted to exchange his weekend with this one. But he said he was coming through here himself, said he had something to go do in Springfield and would bring me along," Corinne explained, causing the gears in Rory's brain to begin turning.

Rory generally had little against him switching weekends or making alternate arrangements to see his daughter. But it was the fact that this was about next weekend that was an issue for her.

"I don't get why he couldn't just call me about it," Rory said, not wanting to talk negatively about Tucker but not bothering to hide her annoyance either.

Corinne shrugged, not really caring about the communication habits of her parents by now.

"You didn't happen to mention to him… about Logan coming to visit?" Rory asked, hating to even think Tucker might become intentionally difficult. It was not like there was any chance for him to return to Rory's life. Rory was certain he knew it too, but it was even worse to think that the man that she had once thought she loved would intentionally want to hurt her by such cheap means.

"Um… I might've," Corinne confessed, having not thought anything of it at the time. It had just been in relation to the logistics, about rather having her dad pick her up or her making some other arrangements to get to Boston by herself instead of having Rory drive her.

"Oh, great," Rory muttered, sounding mildly disappointed.

"You seriously think he'd want to change weekends just because of him?" Corinne asked.

Rory sighed. "I don't know what to think. All I think is that it's just awfully convenient," she said thoughtfully.

"I mean if you want me out of the house when Logan comes, I can ask Sandra if I can stay over or something We'll make it a movie night or something," Corinne suggested, knowing it was a big deal to have Logan come and visit for the first time.

"Oh, no, that's not it, sweetie," Rory chimed. It wasn't like it had ever been a big issue for her to have Logan over whilst Corinne was in the house. It was a little weird, sure, but it was not like Corinne couldn't take a hint when the two wanted some alone time or hung onto her mother for dear life if she wanted to go out with Logan. But there was definitely some anticipation that Rory had had hanging over that weekend, wanting to give Logan his undivided attention. With Corinne in Boston it was the ideal solution, not having to guilt herself for not spending enough of her free time with her daughter considering on week nights she rarely had the time to do anything beyond homework as they watched some movie.

"I know you miss him," Corinne said, meaning Logan which Rory, thankfully got without clarification.

"I do," Rory admitted, feeling grateful that Corinne understood that at least.

Corinne let out a puff of air before continuing. "I don't get why you'd choose to live like this… miles, weeks apart. I'd get it if you two were like in high school or college or something, had families that hated each other or whatever," Corinne explained, having just done Romeo and Juliet last semester at her drama class. Forbidden romance was sort of the theme for Corinne's home reading list too, which Rory pretended to know nothing about. But she'd picked up more than a few of her YA category books herself, wanting to read a little of every genre and understand her daughter a little better as a side note.

"I just think a few months isn't long enough to just uproot everything for. For anyone," Rory tried to rationalize, trying to look at things both ways - both Logan's and her side. She tried to explain things in a way that she hoped her own daughter would one day act accordingly to. It was no secret, however, that a few months of dating someone in high school was vastly different from what she and Logan had shared over the summer.

"Ugh, why does everything have to be so complicated with grown-ups?" Corinne groaned, causing Rory to unexpectedly laugh out loud.

"What?" Corinne asked, taking her mother's laughter a little too personally.

"Oh, it's nothing. I just think you've hit the nail on that one. Being grown up is complicated. Life is complicated. Once there are kids, jobs, exes and long-lost families… whatever… involved, things are complicated. Enjoy it while it's not, okay?" Rory said, chuckling only lightly now, not wanting to offend her daughter.

"So, what should I tell dad? I could lie that I'm busy..." Corinne suggested a few minutes later, as they were approaching their house in Hartford's West End, which was located only a block from where Paris had grown up.

Their house was one of the smallest on the block, the two of them not needing much. But it was a nice house - red brick, and a couple of white pillars by the entrance as was one of the more common styles in the neighborhood.

It was admirable that Corinne would want to do that for her, but that was not the way she wanted her daughter's relationship with her dad to be. After all, as a dad he wasn't half bad. Way better than Christopher had been with her, and later in life that relationship had been incredibly important to her. She didn't want her relationship with Tucker to spoil that.

"I think," Rory inhaled, taking a long moment to think. "I think I'm going to have to give him a call," she added, whilst knowing that technically she could do what she had always done, tiptoeing around her ex-husband to accommodate his requests. But something in her had changed, giving her some much-needed courage to at least confront him about it.