A/N: This story has a lot of inner dialogue at the beginning, and I've italicized the thoughts to make it easier to read.

Happy Birthday, Stephanie Plum!


Chapter One

I woke up to the scent of chocolate chip cookies in the air. Since I live alone, I was a tad concerned. I'm used to people breaking into my apartment, but the ones who cook have been a problem before.

I wore pyjama pants last night since it was a bit chilly, and I was glad of that this morning. I picked up the Louisville Slugger propped up in the corner of my bedroom and wielded it as I tiptoed toward the kitchen. When I rounded the corner, I let out a sigh of relief.

Diesel. Of course.

Usually, I only saw him around the holidays, so his presence today was surprising. No significant holidays were approaching except Halloween, but that wasn't traditionally a time I could expect him to pop in for a visit. I set down the bat and entered the living room.

"Hey, Sweet Cakes! Happy Birthday!"

Oh, yeah. It's my birthday.

"Thanks, Diesel. To what do I owe the honour of a visit? This early in the morning?"

"Honey, it's nine a.m."

"Like I said. This early in the morning."

"Darlin', I sensed your unhappiness in the past few weeks, but I couldn't get away to come and see you. However, I'm here now, and I have a present for you," he said, beaming at me.

I surveyed Diesel for a moment. He didn't give gifts like ordinary men, and they usually caused as much trouble as he did. "How do you know I've been unhappy?" I asked.

"Don't ask questions when you're not ready to hear the answers," he chided gently as he tweaked my nose.

I dropped the fake smile. If he already knows how I'm feeling, then there's no point in using the energy to put on a happy face.

Diesel hugged me, and I took a deep sniff. He always smelled like a weird combination of Christmas, chocolate chip cookies and sex, but it worked for him. "It'll be okay, Sunshine. I promise."

"I hope you're right."

"Which brings me to your birthday present."

I sighed and pulled away from him. "What is it?"

"Steph, for the next twenty-four hours, you will have the ability of telepathy," he stated proudly.

I stood horrorstruck. He can't possibly think I'd want to read the minds of everyone around me. Could he? I read those books about that telepath and the vampires. She was miserable! "No way, Diesel," I said firmly. "No, thank you."

"Too late, Baby Doll. You already have it, and it won't wear off for twenty-four hours. I suggest you take advantage and find out the things you want to know." I looked mutinously at him, but he merely chuckled. "I think this will help you, Stephanie," he said softly. "Trust me."

I snorted and rolled my eyes. "I can't trust you. You are the trickiest…whatever…I've ever met!"

"Twenty-four hours is all I'm asking for. Use your gift wisely." And he poofed out of there.

He certainly knows how to enter and exit a room in style. I thought about his so-called gift for the next couple of hours. I showered and dressed, then tidied my apartment. I mourned the loss of Rex again when I wiped down the kitchen counter where his cage used to live. But mostly, I wondered if I could handle hearing everyone's innermost thoughts, especially if any of them were about me. People weren't exactly shy about telling me to my face exactly what they thought of me, but what if their thoughts were worse?

I couldn't stay holed up in my apartment all day, as much as I'd like to. For one, I need to check in at the office to see if there's any work for me. I sure could use the money. My bank account was in the black, an unusual occurrence, and I'd like to keep it that way. I also can't just sit around all day. I hate being inside, doing nothing.

My first conscious decision to see what people thought was when I skipped the Tasty Pastry on the way to the bonds office. Since I nearly always brought doughnuts, it'd be interesting to see Connie and Lula's reactions when I didn't.

"Hey, White Girl. Happy birthday," Lula greeted. She looked around. "No doughnuts?"

"Sorry, not today."

Lula grumbled, but I also heard it in her thoughts. Damn. White Girl always brings the doughnuts. How could she play me dirty like this? I need my doughnuts.

Okay, this wasn't at all like that telepathic girl in those True Blood books. I had to focus on the person and concentrate to hear their thoughts. That made me feel a little better. I was worried I'd be driven crazy hearing everyone's thoughts just flying at me.

Connie was sitting at her desk, talking on the phone. From the sounds of her end of the conversation, she was nearly ready to hang up. When she did, she chirped, "Happy Birthday, Steph." She reached under her desk and pulled out a white bakery bag, shooting a smirk in Lula's direction. "I brought some special pastries and waited until you arrived."

She held the bag toward me, and when I opened it, I could smell powdered sugar and chocolate. Chocolate cannoli!

I took one and moaned a little when I bit into it. Lula and Connie grabbed the remaining two cannoli, and Lula glared at Connie for holding out on her, but she didn't say anything; her mouth was too full of cannoli to speak. I listened in, but Connie's thoughts were all on her chocolate treat.

"I hope it'll let you forgive me when I tell you there are no new files today," she said after she swallowed. "That little weasel Vinnie has been giving files to Joyce again."

I sighed. The truth is, I've been thinking a lot lately about making some changes. I am not getting any younger and tired of being tossed into dumpsters, shot at, kidnapped, and never having any money. I'm tired of the Molotov cocktails hurled through my living room window and watching my car du jour go up in flames. But what else would I do? The last time I tried to get a regular job didn't go well. Maybe I could work full-time for Rangeman. Ranger and the guys seem to like me, and they've said I'm good at doing searches for them. They could have just been flattering me, though; maybe they didn't mean it.

As I was ruminating on this, the little bell above the door peeled, and I looked up in time to see Ranger and Tank entering the office.

She looks so beautiful. "Hi Ladies, Babe," Ranger said aloud.

Hmm. I wonder who looks so beautiful. I hope it's me. "Hi, Ranger. Hi, Tank," I said.

Tank nodded his head but didn't say anything. Great. I was hoping Lula wouldn't be in the office. I really don't want to see her.

As Ranger walked past me, he leaned down and whispered in my ear, "Happy Birthday, Babe. I need to talk to you after I see Vinnie. Wait for me?" His breath tickled my ear, but he smelled so good. Control yourself, Mañoso. She smells so good.

I nodded. "Okay." My mind was racing. Was Ranger as affected by me as I was by him? He sure didn't show it.

When he was done in Vinnie's office, he grabbed my hand and led me outside to the side of the bonds office in the alley. He pressed me against the wall and kissed me, his hands roaming over my top. I lost myself in that kiss, which seemed to go on forever. Breathless, I pulled away after a few moments, but he was still pressed into me, and I could feel his arousal through his combat pants.

"I have to go away for a few days, Babe. I just wanted to let you know and ask you to please call Tank if you need anything." Please call Tank. I need to know you're safe when I'm not here.

"I will," I lied. I don't like calling Tank. He's polite, but I always feel I'm bothering him.

Ranger studied me for a moment. "Do you promise?" he asked softly. She's lying.

Fuck. I stared back at him, trying to keep my expression neutral. I rolled my eyes. "Fine."

Come on, Steph. Please just work with me for once. Dios, I wish you weren't so frustrating. I love you, but I can't allow myself to get any closer. If something happened to you, I'd never survive it. Maybe I should move to Miami.

I pressed my lips tightly together and looked down as I pulled away. "I have to go. Don't get shot."

"Don't go crazy, Babe."

I hurried away as fast as I could and started singing a song in my head. I didn't want to hear any more of his thoughts. I was trying not to let the tears come because I didn't want him to see me cry.

I didn't return to the bonds office, heading directly to my car instead. I drove and thought about what I had just heard. I knew Ranger loved me; I heard it directly from his head. But if he would never allow himself to act on his feelings, if he held me at arm's length forever, then what was the point of waiting for that ever-elusive possibility of Someday? Was it my fault he didn't want to have a relationship with me? My heart hurt as I pondered the situation. I wanted to fall asleep as I usually do when I want to escape. Denial Land was way too appealing a place. But before I knew it, I was pulling to a stop in front of the little row house where I grew up. That's weird; it was like I was on autopilot, and I came here of all places?

My mom and grandma were waiting on the top stoop for me. How in the hell did they know I was coming when I didn't even know it? Maybe they're unmentionable like Diesel. I greeted them both with kisses on their cheeks, and we went inside.

"Happy birthday, Stephie!" My grandma kissed my cheek when I reached the top step.

"Yes, happy birthday, Stephanie," my mom echoed.

"To what do I owe the honour of your visit, Stephanie?" my mom asked when we were settled at the small table in the kitchen. Please don't tell me you lost your job. It's bad enough my daughter is turning into a spinster, I don't need her to be jobless, too. What would the neighbours think?

I blinked. This is what my mom thought about me? I'm a spinster on the brink of joblessness? "I don't have any open files for work right now, and I thought I'd come for a visit." I turned to Grandma Mazur and focused on her. Her thoughts were a bit of a surprise.

My beautiful baby granddaughter is lying. Something is wrong with her. I hope she's okay. "Stephie, would you like some coffee and cake? Your mom just finished making a coffee cake."

We ate cake, drank coffee, and visited for a while. I didn't hear any other revelations regarding either of their feelings toward me. Grandma loved me and was worried about me. She thought a lot about herself and things going on in her life. She held a lot of secrets. Mom thought about herself and how everyone else's behaviour reflected on her. Before I left, Grandma pressed a small package into my hands, closed my fingers around it and winked. She pressed her finger against her lips, and I smiled before putting the package in my pocket.

Morelli called a few hours later and invited me to come over to watch the Rangers game. He said he'd supply the beer if I brought some Pino's. I called ahead to order a large pizza with everything and two meatball subs. When I walked into Morelli's house forty minutes later, his large orange gangly dog, Bob, nearly bowled me over. I leaned down to scratch his head while he tried to lick my hand. Morelli was sitting on the couch in the living room and waved at me distractedly. I put the pizza on the counter, grabbed a beer from the fridge and plopped on the couch next to Morelli. I handed him his sub, and he kissed my cheek.

"Hiya, Cupcake." He smiled and pulled the neck of my shirt forward to look down at my breasts. Nice. Maybe we can fuck during intermission.

I frowned slightly. We often had sex during intermission, but hearing Morelli put it so crudely in his mind bothered me. I focused on my sub then as the game began.

When the first intermission approached, I went to the bathroom. I didn't want to have sex with Morelli, and I couldn't think of a way to turn him down without it turning into a fight except to pretend I was sick. I did feel a little ill anyway, but that was because of Ranger, not because of the meatball sub and three slices of pizza I had eaten.

I played on my phone for a while until I felt like enough time had passed. I clutched my stomach and groaned as I re-entered the living room.

"Not feeling well, Cupcake? You were in the bathroom a long time."

"I think I should go home," I said. "I don't know what's wrong, but I'm not feeling well."

I kissed him gently and listened to his thoughts again as I gathered my purse and rubbed Bob's head. Damn. I was really hoping to get laid tonight. I wonder if Terri's free.

I didn't say anything further but let the door slam behind me. I guess now I knew that Morelli was cheating on me. The question is, why don't I seem to care more?

I drove home, thinking about the things I had heard so far. Connie didn't think about me, at least not when I was listening in. But she had remembered my birthday, and she got me a cannoli too, which was nice of her. Lula's thoughts were selfish but not hostile. Not a huge surprise there. She was always leaving me stranded if the cops were nearby. Morelli was mostly thinking of me in terms of sex, and I didn't hear one thought where he thought about me otherwise. He didn't appear to have remembered my birthday, either. Ranger was a bit more of a surprise. I knew he loved me, but to hear his reasons, or one of his reasons, for not getting a relationship with me was a bit disconcerting. If I was not so frustrating for him, would he want to be with me? Or would he move to Miami and snuff out any possibility of anything more?

One thing was for sure. I didn't like Diesel's gift, and I was quite content to let the clock run out without hearing anyone else's thoughts. However, life had other plans.