Xander Meets The Avengers...Uh-oh
Afterwards when called out over his rude behavior by the rest of the New Council, Xander reminded everyone he hadn't wanted the job.
There was way more interesting stuff for him to do in New York City than being forced into a quick meet-and-greet with a bunch of folks calling themselves 'Earth's Mightiest Heroes' with an actual straight face. Especially during every night or so, he went out and fought by the side of superhuman teenage girls who regularly saved the world in between energetically discussing nail polish shades, the latest TikTok craze, and whoever back at the Cleveland Slayers House was stealing all the chocolate chip cookies.
This all meant that one day a very unimpressed Xander Harris breezed into the conference room at Avengers Tower at the appointed time for a scheduled meeting with the buildings' occupants save for an absent Bruce Banner. Their newest liaison belonging to some mysterious secret organization dealing with the supernatural (no, really!) started off by casually hailing Steve Rogers as "Gramps."
Next had come a nonchalant aside glance at where Thor was holding Mjolnir and Xander then muttering to himself still loudly enough for the others to hear, "Hammer obviously equals one huge overcompensation for something, yep."
The one-eyed visitor then stared dismissively at Clint, pointing out to him and everybody else listening, "Being crazy good with a bow and arrow just means going up against someone else who's armed with an even more primitive weapon — like, say, only a rock in their hand — will get your ass kicked nine times out of ten."
A vastly entertained Tony Stark didn't enjoy what then came his way, though, when Eyepatch next counted off on his fingers, "Genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist, and yet 'man who can't shave around his chin' is always left out."
Leaving behind an outraged Tony reaching up to unconsciously touch his insulted goatee, Xander then did a careful regard towards the chair where a seated Natasha was in turn giving him a calm, half-lidded gaze.
Decisively declaring "Noooope," Xander did a prompt heel-turn and walked out of the conference room, calling over his shoulder, "It's been fun, gang; we'll have to do this again sometime never."
The speechless male Avengers then focused all their bewildered attention upon a very smug Black Widow who'd just been recognized as the most dangerous person in the place, which was only right and proper.
