Part 43: MEXICO


Vanzilla 2.0 was in Jet mode flying to our next destination.

I am playing video games with Lincoln, Lily, Linka and Lori and Varie, Lilly, Laney, Haiku and Lucy were reading books.

Me: I'm gonna beat you guys!

Lori: I literally think not!

Lily: Don't count on it! (Beats all of them) YES! I WIN!

Me: Wow! Lily is an amazing video game player.

Lilly: She sure is.

Me: Lori I've been meaning to ask you this for a while now.

Lori: What is it?

Me: Where did you come up with the threat of turning people into a human pretzel?

Lori: That's a question I haven't heard in a long time. I got the idea for it during one of my babysitting days.

Flashback:

Lori: (Narrating) It was back when I was in Middle school. The house was totally in a ruckus and no one was listening to me.

Past Lori: Guys calm down please!

Past Luna: No way! This is awesome!

Past Lynn: Yeah what are you gonna do about it?

Lori: (Narrating) They weren't gonna listen to me and that's when I snapped.

Past Lori's head boiled red and her hair turned into a steamwhistle.

TTTTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT!

Past Lori: THAT'S ENOUGH!

Everyone stopped wondering why Lori was upset.

Past Lori: YOU ALL WILL STOP THIS RIGHT NOW AND BEHAVE LIKE NORMAL PEOPLE! IF I CATCH YOU DOING ANYTHING ELSE, I WILL LITERALLY TURN YOU INTO A HUMAN PRETZEL!

Everyone was now terrified of her and they all knew that they had to listen to her from now on or face the consequences of her wrath.

Past Lori: Thank you.

Lori: (Narrating) That's when I became the enforcer and the big sister.

Flashback ends.

Me: Wow. That's amazing.

Lincoln: It sure is. And Lori's been teaching me everything for when she passes the torch to me in the future.

Lori: That's right little bro.

Lilly: That's gonna be so cool Linky.

Varie: That is gonna be cool.

Lucy: It sure is.

Nicole: We're here guys. Welcome to Mexico.

Lincoln: I've always wanted to go to Mexico.

Nicole: You're gonna love it buddy. Mexico has amazing volcanoes and history. We're not going to Honduras, El Salvador or Guatemala because those are considered some of the most lawless countries in Central America.

Lynn Sr.: That's a good reason.

Rita: Good thinking Nicole.

Nicole: Thanks Ms. Rita.

We were flying over Mexico City, the Capital City of Mexico.

Ronnie Anne: So this is Mexico City. I've always wanted to see the city we came from.

Lincoln: I didn't know you were originally from Mexico, Ronnie Anne.

Ronnie Anne: That's right Lame-o. Me and my family came to Michigan from Mexico a long time ago.

Linka: That is so cool.

Me: Mexico: I was only a baby when we went here for the first time. But this is such a beautiful sight.

Varie: It sure is.

Nicole: You'll love our first stop.


We arrived at our first stop in Mexico: A volcano called Paricutin.

Nicole: This is Paricutin Volcano, one of the 7 Natural Wonders of the world. It first formed from 1943 to 1952 which was considered unusually long for a volcano to form.

Naruto: That's amazing.

Sakura: It sure is.

Lola: How come it took so long to form a volcano like this?

Nicole: Usually it takes about 3 weeks to form a baby volcano.

Jessie K: I remember reading about this. It was one of the most amazing acts of volcanic formation in the world.

Mary: That's amazing.

Nicole: Let me show you guys a building by the volcano.

We went to the ruins of the San Juan Parangaricutiro Church.

Kate: Wow. What is all this?

Jessie K: I know this church. These are the ruins of the San Juan Parangaricutiro Church. It was destroyed when Paricutin erupted from 1942 to 1953 and its been left here to crumble like a rotting wound.

Lola: This is awful. I can't believe that a volcano would destroy a church like this.

Lana: Me neither. This church could use a serious renovation.

Me: We can't do that guys. This church is so run down that it would collapse should we attempt to repair it.


Next we were in Chihuahua, Mexico and we were in the Cave of The Crystals.

Nicole: The Cave of The Crystals. One of the most amazing crystal caves in the world.

Everyone: Wow./It's amazing./This is unbelievable.

Lori: This is literally the most amazing crystal cave I've ever scene.

Leni: Totes but why is it so hot in here?

Me: The temperature in here can get to 136 degrees fahrenheit and there's 99% humidity.

Eddy: Man I'm frying like an egg in here.

Eddy takes off his shirt.

Luan: I'm hot too Eddy-bear.

Luna: How did these crystals form in this cave dudes?

Nicole: It took thousands of years to form this magnificent cave because of the geothermal heat from the Earth's mantle.

Sam: This is an amazing cave guys. But why is it so humid in here too?

Nicole: There's a pocket of underground water between both Caves of Crystals. The geothermal heat from the Earth's mantle heats the water and the steam comes into the caves and gives it its humidity.

Lincoln: This is all amazing.

Lilly: It sure is.

Haiku: If I had a heart it would be swelling with excitement.

Lucy: Mine too.

Lynn: What are these crystals that are forming in here?

Lisa: These crystals Lynn are giant Calcium Sulfate Dihydrate; Street name: Gypsum.

Me: That's right. Gypsum is a beautiful crystal.

Terra: This is so cool though. I would never live in a cave this hot though.

Raven: Me neither.

Starfire: It is too hot.

Volcana: It sure is. I may love fire but this is too hot for me.

Me: That's true.


Next we were at the volcano caldera El Chichon.

Nicole: This is El Chichon. A volcano that erupted suddenly and without warning on April 4th, 1982.

Jessie K: I remember reading about this. It was declared the worst disaster in Mexico's history. Over 2,000 people dead.

Nicole: That's right. It ranked level 5 on the Volcanic Explosivity Index and 20 million tons of volcanic ash reached the Stratosphere and spread around the globe in three weeks. It was very comparable to the 1991 eruption of Pinatubo in the Philippines. 24,000 square kilometers of land, crops, and the area were affected and 9 villages were completely leveled and over 2,000 people were killed. Look here.

We saw some skulls and bones that were untouched after almost 36 years.

Naruto: This was horrible.

I pick up a skull that was burned on the front of the face.

Me: YEE! This person received the full force of the eruption in the face head on and burned him bad. Look.

I show the skull to everyone and they gasped and it was awful.

Lucy: Wicked.

Haiku: It sure is Lucy.

Shannon: That is awful. From the looks of things he never even knew what hit him until it was too late.

Me: This was back almost 36 years ago and that was a horrible event for these people.

Nicole: That's right dad. But El Chichon was overshadowed by the eruption of Nevado Del Ruiz in Colombia 3 years later in 1985.

Me: That's bad.

Kate: It sure was. I can't believe that volcanic eruptions pack so much destructive power.

Lana: Me neither Kate.

Laney: What did the volcano look like before it erupted?

Nicole: Here's a picture of it Laney.

Nicole showed them a picture of El Chichon before it erupted.

Laney: It looked like a forest covered hill.

Nicole: It sure did. And all that explosive pressure caused El Chichon to blow its top. Literally.

Luan: This is an Explosive eruption that Blew your mind. (Laughs to Rimshot) Get it?

We all laugh.

Me: (Laughs) That was a good one Luan.

Varie: (Laughs) That was funny.

Aylene: That was funny.

Eddy: It sure was.

Cody: That was funny.

Zoe: Yep.


Next we were at the Ruins of the ancient city of Tikal in Guatemala.

Jessie K: The ancient ruins of the Mayan City Tikal.

Me: Oh wow. I told you about this city when we were in Ecuador.

Shannon: From the movie Apocalypto right?

Me: That's right.

Jessie K: Apocalypto was an awesome movie.

Brittney: It sure was. How they sacrificed to the Mayan Gods was wicked.

Lucy: It sure was Brittney.

Jessie K: Let me show you something that the Mayan's here were known for.

Jessie lead us to a hall of paintings.

Jessie K: This painting here shows how they sacrificed people to their gods. They rip the still beating heart out of them and cut their head off.

Everyone: EEWW!

Jessie K: I know it's gross but that's how they did it back in 1511. Let me show you something really cool. (Snaps Fingers)

The area changed to the city of Tikal in the year 1511 and we were witnessing how Human Sacrifice was done.

WARNING: THIS PART IS GRUESOME. READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.

Lori: Where are we?

Jessie K: This is the city of Tikal back in 1511. This is all just an illusion of what happened back then. These people can't see us or hear us. We are gonna witness how they sacrificed to their gods.

We were on the Tikal Temple and we saw the high priest cut open a mans chest and rip out his still beating heart and then another man took an axe and cut his head off and threw it down the pyramid where it was caught in a net below and the body was disposed of.

Lola fainted after seeing this and Lucy and Haiku smiled in delight.

Shannon: That was gruesome and awesome.

Lincoln: And this is what they did back then Jessie?

Jessie K: Yep. But after the Spanish Conquest the Mayans, Incans and Aztecs were all destroyed and are now extinct. It might've been gruesome but that's how it happened back then.

Lana: Well that's a relief.

Lynn: It sure is.

Lynn Sr.: How did the Mayan's go extinct?

Jessie K: It was because of the Spanish Conquistadors killing them, disease or starvation.

Linka: I'm glad the Mayans are all gone.

Me: Me too.

Varie: Same here.

The illusion vanished.

Lori: That was literally a strange illusion.

Leni: Totes. But that was a scary one.

Jessie K: I know. I'm sorry if I scared all of you.

Cody: You didn't scare us Jessie. We knew it was all apart of the history here.

Lola: I'm sorry I fainted but that was weird and g-ross.

We saw lots of very prominent artifacts from the Mayan world. We saw cool masks, ancient weapons, jewelry, and more.

Lori: This has literally been a very fun trip to Mexico.

Leni: Totes. I look amazing with this Mayan tiara.

Me: That's actually called a Mayan Headdress. It's a very popular piece of clothing they had in the Mayan days.

Lori: I literally look amazing with this jewelry.

Lori had rings and bracelets on her hands and arms made of opals and sapphires and peacock feathers. She also had a dress and made of kashmir and a little cape made of peacock feathers.

Varie: They look stylish on you Lori.

Lori: Thanks Varie.


Later in Mexico city we saw the most ancient relic in all of the Mayan world: The Mayan Calendar.

Lisa: The Mayan Calendar. I love this ancient relic.

Jessie K: Me too Lisa. It's my favorite relic in the ancient world. This calendar was used by the Mayan's to determine when the world was going to end.

Chione: How was this going to determine if the world was going to end?

Jessie K: These symbols represent the months and the days and the years. The Mayan's believed that the world was going to end on December 21st, 2012.

Lucy: That was 5 years ago.

Jessie K: Yes that was 5 years ago. But they recently discovered that one of the runes in the Mayan calendar was mistranslated. The world is going to end on the projected date of the year 3,000.

Lincoln: That's a long time from now.

Lisa: Correct elder brother. So we have nothing to worry about.

Lily: No we don't.

Fu: That's a relief. But something still bothers me. Why couldn't Wednesday, Liam, Tabby or Zach come with us?

Me: They decided to stay back and go to school so they are under the care of Mr. Albert.

Lincoln: Oh yeah. Pop-pop is a great grandpa and a great babysitter.

Varie: It was nice of your grandpa to watch them while we were away.

Rita: That's dad for you Varie. By the way I'm planning on getting that terrible nurse Sue fired after we get back. Would you like to sign up for a job at Sunset Canyon Retirement Home?

Varie: I would be honored Ms. Rita.

Rita: Great.

Later we did all sorts of stuff in Mexico and explored all the sights and learned so much about Mexico's history and tried all the food. It was all spicy and delicious.

We then went to our next destination.

Continues in Part 44.