Hawk's punch made Dad fall heavily onto the sand. In a heartbeat, he was on top of him, his fist hammering Dad's face again, again, again. Blood covered his hands, it sprayed onto the sand and painted Dad's shirt red.

The woman Dad had been with, was screaming and crying, but Hawk barely heard it. Rage made his blood sing in his ears, he didn't care about anything. Dad groaned and tried to cover his face, to block the punches, but in vain - Hawk wasn't a kid anymore, he wasn't the one who was getting his ass kicked anymore, he was stronger than Dad now, and he was going to kill that fucking asshole—!

"Hawk, stop—!" Miguel's voice cut through Hawk's senses, as he felt a pair of hands gripping his arm, pulling him back.

"No! Let me go—!"

An animal growl left Hawk's lips, as he tried to struggle free, but Miguel's grip held. Demetri rushed to his aid, and together they tried to pull Hawk off Dad, and Hawk's grip on him loosened. Not hesitating for a second, Dad seized the moment and his kick landed in Hawk's gut, making him let out a pained groan.

From sheer shock, Miguel and Demetri let go of Hawk, and instantly, he was wrestling with Dad on the sand again, hitting him in the face in blood-red fury, but now getting punched too. Dad's fist met his cheek and he tasted blood—

"Enough! Stop it!" Miguel commanded, and grabbed Hawk again, pulling him back. Together with Demetri, he managed to get the kicking and writhing Hawk off Dad and drag him further until he was out of Dad's reach.

"Asshole—!" Hawk yelled, his voice breaking, hot rage burning his windpipe. "You fucking asshole! How could you do this? How could you do this to Mom? I'll fucking kill you—!"

Dad was groaning and spitting blood, trying to roll onto his side on the shoreline. A wave washed over him, soaking his nice pants and the collared shirt that was now stained and bloodied. The pretty, blond woman he'd been with, rushed to his aid crying hysterically, and her sneakers got wet in the shallow water, as she tried to help Dad up.

"Josh, Josh— are you alright? Oh my god, I'm calling the police—!"

Blood poured into Hawk's mouth - the soft inside of his cheek was scraped, the pain was piercing, but Hawk barely recognized it. He'd had worse. The pain wasn't what killed him. It was the sight of the young, pretty lady by Dad's side, that was carving out his heart. She looked so worried, she was clearly upset as fuck, crying rivers down her flushed cheeks, and—

Hawk's glance swept at her rounded belly, and a new wave of nausea hit him. That woman was very pregnant. Shit, if she went into labor because of this shock— Hawk swallowed hard, forcing himself to calm down. He wasn't prepared to deliver his Dad's bastard on a public beach, for fuck's sake.

"Let go of me— I'm okay," he groaned to his friends, who were still holding him back in their iron grip, Demetri hanging in one arm, Miguel in the other.

His friends did as he had told them, and Hawk drew in a deep, shaky breath watching how Dad crawled up onto his feet, aided by the pregnant woman. He was bleeding heavily from his nose, there were bruises forming on his cheeks and in his dirty, torn clothes, he looked pathetic, beaten, which gave Hawk some level of satisfaction.

"You can call the police all you want," he spat out the bitter words. "But you fucking piece of shit, you deserved this—"

"No— no police," Dad groaned. "Eli— I—"

"Shut your fucking mouth!" Hawk yelled, the rage breaking his voice. "I don't wanna hear anything you say! The fucking work trips? The late nights at the office? You were supposed to be in Toronto this week! This is not fucking Toronto! Mom's been waiting for you to call her all fucking week, and what the fuck— you were fucking this— this—" he stopped mid-sentence, lacking a fitting word. He was drowning in anger, in bitterness, he wanted to call that woman names, slut, whore, bitch— but he held his tongue.

"Did you even tell her you already had a family?" He rasped and then turned his eyes to the crying woman. "Jesus fucking Christ, that's my fucking Dad! He's married! Has been for like 20 fucking years!"

"Josh— Is that true?" The woman breathed, sobbing so hard that her whole body was shaking. "You're married?"

"Hannah, please, it's not like that. I'm divorcing—" Dad tried to wipe his bloody face with a napkin he had produced from the pocket of his pants - but the napkin was soaked with seawater, and he made a mess, smearing the blood all over his face.

"You lying piece of shit!" Hawk yelled. "Divorcing? I guess you just forgot to tell that to Mom, huh—?"

"What's going on between me and your mother is none of your business," Dad turned his attention to Hawk, pointing an angry finger at him. "No one can blame me for wanting a second chance after how you turned up. Disappointment after disappointment, since the day you were born."

Suddenly the burning anger in Hawk's chest died. All he could feel was emptiness, a hollow ache at the place of his heart. He looked at Dad - at his filthy, wet, blood-stained clothes, his thinning hairline, the bitter look on his face, and for the first time ever, he wasn't afraid of Dad. That man was a pitiful creature. Hawk didn't need his love, his acceptance.

"You're seriously trying to blame this on me?" He rasped. "What the fuck did I ever do to you? Is it the cleft lip? Or that I'm on the spectrum? Or that I never liked football or— or fucking baseball? I was never good enough for you, but you know what, Dad? None of it was my fault!"

"Everything was your fault!" Dad raged, bloody saliva falling to his lips. "Everything! You are an embarrassment, deformed, a disappointment, you were never normal—!"

Hawk turned his eyes back to the young woman who was crying uncontrollably, tears running down her flushed cheeks. The breeze made her blond locks fly around her flushed face, gluing strands on her wet cheeks as she kept sobbing, holding her rounded belly with shaking hands. She was very pretty, and with a jolt, Hawk realized she probably wasn't that much older than he was - she looked like she was in her early twenties. The anger Hawk had felt for her for breaking his family, was long gone by now. It was clear Dad had played her, used her, lied to her - just like he had lied to all of them.

"You sure you want that guy raising your baby?" Hawk asked. "You should know - he also beats his kids. And his wife. So maybe run as long as you can."

"What—?" Her eyes widened. "Josh—?"

"That's a lie!" Dad yelled, his voice breaking with rage. "Hannah, he's lying!"

"Yeah, whatever, believe me, or don't." Hawk replied with a shrug. "But he's been beating the crap out of me since I was a fucking toddler."

"Actually, I can confirm that," said Demetri a bit awkwardly, stepping to Hawk's side. "Eli isn't the one who is lying. It's Mr. Moskowitz."

Hawk glanced at his friend, and an enormous gratitude warmed his chest like sunlight. Demetri. His best friend, his binary brother. Demetri, who had never stopped believing in the good in him, Demetri who had always been there for him, since the first day of kindergarten and every fucking day since. Of course, Demetri would back him up. He couldn't even count how many times he had run to Demetri's place which was just across the street from his home, after Dad had yelled at him or hit him. And Demetri had always been there for him, always helping, supporting, never judging.

He turned his eyes back to Dad and tilted up his chin in a defiant gesture. With his friends by his side, he wasn't afraid of anything.

"I'm not scared of you anymore. That shit ends tonight. And you're never stepping foot in our house again."

Dad's face turned red with anger and for a moment Hawk thought he would attack, that he would try to punch him again, but Dad glanced at Demetri and Miguel who stood on both sides of Hawk like bodyguards, and slowly he unclenched his fists.

Coward. He had always been a coward. Always bullying the ones who were smaller than him, the ones who were defenseless, always hitting Eli when Mom wasn't home, or the other way around, punching them in places no one could see.

Dad's face twisted with anger when he spoke. "You can't throw me out of my own house! My money paid for the roof over your head—!"

"Yeah, whatever," Hawk spat out a bitter laugh. "I'll fucking change the locks."

With that he turned around and started walking away, leaving behind both Dad and the crying woman - he felt bad for her, he did, but he wasn't going to offer a ride to Dad's girlfriend. It really wasn't his problem how she got home. Behind him, he heard how Dad started yelling at her, how she raised her voice too, and the cacophony of angry, arguing voices was so fucking familiar, like a slap in the face, that he thought he would be sick.

The soundtrack of his childhood.

Not anymore. Not anymore. If he fucking tries to come back home after this, I'll tear him apart. And Mom— she's not gonna forgive him this time. She fucking can't—

He was silent in the car, concentrating on nothing but the traffic. Of the three of them, he was still the only one with a license, so he was the one who had to drive. Miguel seemed to be lost in thought, and even Demetri was uncharacteristically silent, though he kept glancing at Hawk with a worried frown all the way home.

He first dropped Miguel off, then Demetri. They both said they could come with him, that he shouldn't be alone, but he shrugged that off, told them it was okay, that he needed to do this alone, that he would call them later, but when the moment came and he was sitting in his car on the driveway in front of his house, gripping the steering wheel with trembling hands, Hawk couldn't make himself to step out and walk to his front door.

Mom.

His stomach clenched into a tight ball of anxiety. His foot was tapping the floor of the car in a nervous, agonized beat. He would have to tell Mom what had happened. Jesus Christ. Mom would cry. She would be devastated. It would be horrible.

He glanced at his hands that held the steering wheel, his bloodied knuckles. The ache in his gut, on his ribs was worsening by the moment and he knew his face was bloodied and bruised too. There was a cut in the inside of his cheek, where the teeth had scraped it and the taste of iron and salt lingered on his lips.

Mom would freak out if she saw him like that. She would be horrified. He didn't want to deal with that now, he couldn't deal with any of this now, not yet, not like this when everything that had happened with Dad was a raw, open wound in his soul, his words were still running through his mind, vicious and sharp.

Disappointment. Deformed. Never normal—

Making a split-second decision, he started the car again and took off tires screeching. He knew he was driving faster than he should have, faster than what was safe or necessary, but for once he didn't care.

Sky's car was on the driveway - and only then Hawk realized that he hadn't even asked if she was home, but had taken it for granted. Fucking stupid— Sky had left the dojo with Cody only a couple of hours ago. Cody had suggested they went to the steam room, that they used the jacuzzi, and Hawk knew what that really meant, it meant Sky naked in Cody's arms, it meant kissing and making out and love and sex, and all the things Sky was giving to Cody now, not to him, never again to him.

But right now he didn't even care. Jealousy barely touched his chest through all the heavy, suffocating pain he was holding in.

He needed her.

Needed her as a friend, as a fellow human being, as someone who would just hold him and tell him it was all going to be okay, as someone who would let him cry—

Because the tears were welling inside of him like an ocean, splashing at the edges of his hurt and pain. He had been holding them back all the car drive with Demetri and Miguel, because fucking Hell, guys didn't cry, at least not for such a stupid reason. His parents were breaking up, his Dad was an asshole, but really, that happened to so many people, Miguel didn't even have a Dad at all, so what the fuck was there to cry about? Hawk knew he was a pussy for wanting to fall apart, he knew that, but couldn't help it, couldn't hold back the tears anymore now that the adrenaline of the fight was finally leaving his system. He was cold, shivering, exhausted, filled with nameless sorrow, as if there was a hole in his chest.

Sky opened the door only after he had rang the doorbell three times.

"Hawk?" she breathed, frowning - and then noticing the blood on his hands, on his face: "Oh my god, what happened?"

She was tiny in the doorway, wearing an oversized black T-shirt with a Slipknot logo - the same one she had been wearing that day a week ago when he had walked up here to comfort her after Luke's death. And just like then, she looked like she'd been crying. Her eyes were red-rimmed, her face pale, her hair was a mess. It took all Hawk had, not to fall into her arms the moment he saw her, because God, he needed her, needed her like never before, but—

She's dating Cody. I can't mess that up for her, I can't.

So he held himself back, gluing his feet on the front steps, but he couldn't hide the emotion that was tearing him apart, the shaky, broken breaths that were breaking through his chest, the tears that fell to his cheeks, burning, shameful. His shoulders sagged under the unbearable weight he was carrying.

"Can I— can I come in?" Those words were barely more than a whimper, a sniffle. "I— I didn't know where else to go."

Sky's face softened, she laid a hand on his forearm, her touch so gentle, so soft, and yet it was burning into his skin through the sleeve of his hoodie.

"Of course," she sighed and stepped aside. "Always."