Chapter 7
The ninja was holding on for dear life atop of the bus, as the bus driver had decided to forgo any and all safety laws, aside from wearing his seatbelt for some odd reason. After running over their fourth stop sign, the ninja finally realized that they were close enough to the city, "Stop the bus!" The eccentric bus driver abruptly stepped on the breaks, almost causing the ninja to fall off from the sudden change in momentum.
The bus driver nonchalantly got off his bus and dusted himself off, while the dazed ninja commented on his driving skills, saying, "Children ride on this thing man!" The driver merely shrugged his shoulders and went about his own business. The ninja's face turned an odd shade of green as nausea filled his senses, he approached the nearest trash can hurling his face into it, "That's it, next time I'm walking to the city!" He groaned and dove his head back into the can.
A freshly repaired Robo-Ape walked through the halls of McFist Industries, paying no attention to the torrent of overworked Robo-Apes controlled by their new master. He entered McFist's office and approached the Sorceress, relaying his report with a monotone voice, "Our scans show that the ninja has entered the city." The Sorceress' smile widened, "Then it is time for phase 2." Her statement caused confusion amongst her two collaborators who spoke amongst themselves. "What does she mean by phase 2, Viceroy?" McFist asked the mad scientist, who seemed to be deep in thought, "I don't know, but whatever it is, I'm glad I'm not at the receiving end of it."
Viceroy and McFist visibly cringed as the Sorceress began to cackle, preparing their facilities for the next part of their plan.
After releasing every last bit of his lunch, the ninja closed his eyes and concentrated on the noises and scents that he was looking for. It was much more difficult than he thought, though he shouldn't have been surprised that the bustling city had so much stimuli for his senses. Nonetheless, his concentration paid off, as he managed to find a squad of Robo-Lizards near the cinema house, McFist-A-Plex.
Dashing through the crowd, the ninja immediately leaped into action, "Ninja jump!" As he entered the facility's vents, he detected a Robo-Lizards in one of the cinema rooms that was showing a repeat screening of Grave Puncher: The Movie. Breaking through the vent, the ninja landed on one of the cinema seats disrupting a viewer, "Hey! Can't you see I'm watching over here!" The ninja rolled his eyes, "Can't you see that I'm trying to do my job?"
Before the ninja could get into an argument with the now visibly angry audience, he pulled out a round shaped object from his suit, and threw it directly behind him, "Ninja ring throw!" The ring made contact with another Robo-Lizard, affirming the ninja's suspicions behind their presence in the area. Though once again, the machine immediately broke down into nothing because of the liquid that was inside them.
The ninja's behavior perturbed the movie goers as to them, it appeared as though he was merely fighting the air as he sliced and diced more and more of the Robo-Lizards, not letting them hurt a single individual. Eventually, the audience was evacuated by the attending Robo-Apes of the cinema, "Please exit in an orderly manner during an unannounced Ninja attack," they spoke in unison as they guided the audience away from the fight.
"That's one last thing to worry about," the ninja noted as he finished defeating the last of the Robo-Lizards in the facility, "Did McFist really think that spreading these guys all over the city would be enough?" The city's protector moved outside and honed his senses once again.
The Robo-Lizards were all over the place, the ninja sighed, running towards Greg's Game Hole, to do the same thing again. The ninja detected a Robo-Lizard on the store's neon-lit sign and sliced through it, not wasting any time the ninja moved towards the next location. Failing to notice that the Game Hole's proprietor, Greg had seen the attack as the ninja destroyed a staple of his store, "Not cool ninja, not cool."
The ninja dashed towards the violet and purple adorned Lazer-A-Rena, as he threw a ninja hot ball towards the direction of the Robo-Lizards that infiltrated the facility. After destroying the machines inside the arena, the ninja exited the premises not realizing that he destroyed the Super Mega Prize situated above the ticket booth. "The ninja really ganked our cheese, eh?" The band geek Bucky nudged his glasses wearing partner, otherwise known as Flute Girl causing her to get annoyed, pushing Bucky away from her, "Don't touch me!"
Swinging through the town, the ninja approached the two competing food chains in Norrisville, PJ McFlubbusters and Charlie Clucker's Chicken Bucket. The ninja threw a tiny black ball with red spikes into the air, shouting, "Ninja tiny exploding ball!" As the ball's explosion made contact with several Robo-Lizards, the ninja pumped his arm and proudly yelled out, "Strike!" The commotion from outside the restaurants however, led the proud owner of Charlie Clucker's Chicken Bucket to exit the street and speak out with a thick Southern accent, "What in tarnation is going on here?" As the ninja kicked the nearby light pole falling on his restaurant, "Sorry about that, just dealing with a lizard problem!" The ninja jumped moving towards the restaurant situated across his own.
PJ McFlubbuster decided to exit his own restaurant to rub the recent damage in his competitor's face, "What's the matter? Did your restaurant decide to kick the bucket?" The wheelchaired gentleman laughed at the disgruntled restaurant owner, but before the latter could form a comeback, the PJ McFlubbusters' sign fell narrowly crushing its owner.
The ruins of PJ's restaurant were probably the saddest sight in the entire tenure of the restaurant owner, though the sound of Charlie's laughter from across the street came in a close second.
Viceroy was visibly annoyed at the waste of resources that the Sorceress' plan was requiring, though the single-armed man beside him was giddy with excitement. "What are you so happy about sir?" Viceroy asked, as McFist giggled, "Well, Viceroy, guess who's finally going to be the proud owner of 'Wrap City'?" McFist raised his two thumbs toward himself expecting a response from the scientist, which only elicited a deadpan stare, as McFist continued pointing to himself with a smile.
With a sigh, Viceroy decided to entertain his boss' rhetorical question, "You sir?" McFist laughed haughtily, "You're darn right it's me!" His celebration was cut short as the Sorceress began to mumble as green flames surrounded her. "Uh…Viceroy, do you have any idea what she's doing?" The two men backed away from the witch as her flames encircled McFist's office, "Do I look like I went to magic school?" Viceroy sarcastically remarked.
McFist chided him, "We wouldn't be here in the first place if you did!" The Sorceress opened her eyes, brimming with bright green energy, "This is phase two."
The ninja had finally destroyed all of the Robo-Lizards hidden in the city, "That was a pretty wonk work out," panting the ninja wiped the sweat off his eyes, "Maybe I can finally go home and get some rest, I'm all out of juice." The ninja threw down a smoke bomb and headed to his humble abode.
Unbeknownst to the now resting ninja, the Sorceress had commanded the Robo-Lizards to place bombs in several locations in the city, ones that would detonate upon her command. The bombs were designed to emulate the ninja's signature and favored smoke bombs, all it needed was a single push of a button. The Sorceress smirked as she did so. Explosions rang out through the city, as the Sorceress maniacal laughter could be heard within McFist Industries. Phase two was complete.
Viceroy and McFist held each other as the explosions shook the building, only to embarrassedly let go of the other as they died down. Viceroy curious asked, "What did you do?" The Sorceress smiled, "The ninja has always lacked the ability to look ahead. All I did was tire him out." She said smugly. McFist however, did not join in her celebration, and was instead bawling out his eyes, "Why would you do that?! You destroyed every single McKicks store on that street!" The Sorceress corrected McFist's assessment of the situation, "You mean the 'ninja' destroyed every McKicks store on that street."
"What?" McFist obliviousness caused Viceroy to push his glasses up on his face, "She means that we should blame the ninja for the damages, isn't that, right?" The Sorceress nodded and McFist had an impressed expression on his face.
The Sorceress rubbed her hands together and turned to McFist, "Now, McFist, you will play the leading role for our dear phase 3, get your best suit," McFist, surprised, pointed to himself, "Me?" Viceroy deadpan stared at him, "I mean of course, I've known that the plan has always hinged on me!" McFist laughed to himself as the Sorceress continued to monitor the situation.
Randy woke up to the sound of his phone's ringtone. Groggily, he touched the screen to accept the call. "Hello?" He said with a raspy voice. "Cunningham," came the voice of his best friend on the other side of the call, "What in the ever-loving cheese did you do?!" The loud outburst woke the half-asleep Randy up, causing him to fall from his elevated bed, "W-What? What do you mean what did I do?" He asked as he scratched the dust from his eyes.
His best friend gasped, "You haven't heard? You destroyed half the city!" Randy shook his head, saying, "What? I mean, I did a bit of damage earlier, but nothing too major." Randy's phone pinged, as he received a video message from his friend, "Here check it out Cunningham." Randy tapped the link leading him to a live video footage of fires being put out by McFist's Robo-Apes.
A female reporter was narrating the scene, "This just in, footage of the ninja destroying half the city," Randy blinked as the footage showed the ninja kicking and punching the air, hitting pillars and causing the destruction of buildings. "What the juice?! I was fighting invisible Robo-Lizards!" Howard scoffed, "Well unless you have evidence of these 'invisible' Robo-Lizards, you're officially public shoob number one!"
"Well, I can't because the lizards…dissolved into the ground," Randy pieced it together, "McFist must've pinned this all on me, but where did that fire come from?" Before Randy could form an answer for his question, Howard pivoted the topic onto something far more important, "Who cares about the fire? You destroyed our favorite restaurants!"
The news report shifted its attention to the two largest restaurant owners in Norrisville. PJ McFlubbuster spoke up sobbing, "The ninja destroyed my home and my business, where will people get their Inside-Outside Onion Blossom now?" The man's wheelchair was suddenly pushed aside by his competitor who was also a bawling mess, "And where will the people get our even more famous chicken bowl!?" His cries fell short, as PJ McFlubbuster rammed his wheelchair into Charlie leading to a brawl between the two restaurant owners.
The news anchor coughed awkwardly, but then received a call from her hands-free earpiece, nodding along with what was being told to her. She turned her attention back to the cameraman, announcing, "News from McFist industries tonight, as its CEO has decided to provide a statement on the recent destruction of the town," the broadcast transitioned to McFist industries where its owner stood on a podium, "Ladies and gentlemen," McFist paused to fix his tie, "It is with great…uh…what's that word?" He squinted his eyes as he struggled to read his teleprompter, eliciting a giggle from the nearby Robo-Apes. "I heard that!" McFist threw his shoe at the head of a nearby Robo-Ape.
"Ahem," McFist composed himself and spoke solemnly, "It is with great sorrow that I speak to you all here today, the ninja has destroyed so much of our beloved properties," he paused to correct himself, "I mean, so much of our beloved town, and all for what? Because he was fighting the air?" McFist reached inside his suit's pockets to reveal a remote which he pushed revealing more footage of the ninja on the screen behind him. "This kind of behavior is unacceptable. I mean for crying out loud, he hid the fact that an evil Sorcerer was living under the very place where our children learn and study!" The crowd roared aggressively with each point that McFist was making. "He failed to protect our children from this…uh…this thing, and he let them turn into monsters!" The screen showed footage of monster attacks that happened the previous years.
The crowd booed and yelled out in protest of the ninja's actions, McFist smiled, the Sorceress' plan was working perfectly. And so, he continued his speech, "Being the ever so generous me," he haughtily poised his hand towards himself, "I have decided to step up and provide the town with the protection it needs. Without the monstrous Sorcerer, we don't need the ninja anymore! I have already provided Norrisville High with McFist approved shelters and now I will ensure their safety by positioning Robo-Apes at the school! And soon the rest of the town will be protected by McFist Industries!" The crowd fell silent at this questionable move, McFist was essentially attempting to police the entire city with a private army. McFist knew that there was only one way to have the crowd side with him, it was a difficult decision, so he heaved a sigh and quietly added, "All for free…" The crowd cheered and McFist graciously bowed, "Thank you! Thank you! I'll be here all week…"
While watching the broadcast, Randy was only left asking how did things end up this way? Arrows and words formed covering his vision, reminding him of the Nomicon's wisdom, "'Defeat can be a trap that has yet to be sprung', Randy realized. "I totally shoobed this up," Randy placed his hands on his face in shame. Howard unaware of his friend's depressed state decided to rub it in, "Yeah, well tell me something I don't know."
"What am I supposed to do?" Randy asked in a distressed tone, "I don't know, why are you asking me? I never have any ideas," Howard stated bluntly, as he saw his best friend pace back and forth in his room. In concern, Howard decided to comfort his friend "Hey, you can fix this! You shoob things up and then unshoob them, right?" Randy agreed and affirmed himself, "Yeah, that's how I do things."
"Besides, the ninja's been in worse spots before, especially with you shoobin' up his reputation," Randy rolled his eyes at his friend's straightforwardness. "To be fair, half the time I ruin the ninja's reputation it's mostly your fault or someone else's." Howard fell for his friend's provocation, "Oh you did not just go there Cunningham!"
"Remember the fart incident?" Randy pointed out, as Howard groaned, "Of course I remember that, every last student in that creative writing class still has nightmares of it." The purple haired teen confused asked, "How do you know that everyone has nightmares of it?"
"Oh, you don't want to know."
The two friends chatted the night away, distracting themselves of the dangers that would've come tomorrow.
"Was that the performance of a lifetime or what?" McFist proudly asked as he approached his two benefactors. "Or what?" Viceroy answered mockingly, eliciting rage from the businessman. While the Sorceress merely clapped her hands, "It was a serviceable performance, though admittedly your sincerity and humility could use more work," the sudden critique also made McFist annoyed but knew better than to oppose his new boss.
Composing himself, McFist asked, "So what's the plan now?" Smirking, the Sorceress answered, "Now," a ball of fire formed in the Sorceress' hands, "We end this once and for all." On her command, the eyes of numerous Robo-Apes glowed as they walked towards Norrisville High.
A/N: Hey everyone, Somi here! Bit of a short chapter this time, but the next chapter should be fairly longer. Unfortunately, I won't be able to upload next week. As I have a seminar that I have to attend to, so the next update will likely be a two week wait.
