Chubby Wisdom 3 - or 'The wisdom of Bastardery giving hope to weak-minded morons in a fantasy world of Reverse Sexual Morality' (Redeemed Ugly Bastard Isekai in a Fantasy World)

A new day, a new sermon, a new hassle by the confessional booth.

"F-Forgive me, father, for I am… a horrible wife!"

I inhaled softly. "Why do you believe so, child?"

The woman known as Alginia was the daughter of the tool shop's owner, and she was married to one of the guards in town. They have been sweethearts since they were mere kids and I could tell that… this was no longer the case.

"I have- I have terrible thoughts. I always dream of other men that are not my Angus."

My lips twitched. A betrayal on the making, a slut in the process of giving up. I had to be blunt about this as this was, well, a rare situation. How many women actively sought advice from me in handling their sinful thoughts? Very few, sadly.

"Alginia, dreaming of others is not the same as acting upon the impulse."

My words fell on deaf ears, sadly, as the woman was driven by the guilt to speak up against those.

"I-It's not that simple. The temptation, the need to play with myself while my dear Angus seems to ignore me… I know that guards are busy, but he has been so busy for months now. I feel untouched, without care and love."

I closed my eyes. "Relationships that last through these adversities tend to be the strongest. You may pursue masturbation if required to keep your sinful needs at bay. You are a wife, no longer a woman without bond to a man."

"...I dream of a strong man of guts," Alginia muttered sensually. "A man that can be seen as hideous, but carries wisdom beyond their age. Driven by faith and honor, driven by a strength that-"

"Enough."

My flat interruption worked, with the woman tensing up a bit as I caught her on her effort. The gall to bring up such a thought was outrageous and staining my honor as a priest.

"Alginia, I am a man of patience, so is your husband, the one you swore to be by his side in return of equal trust. You dare to bring treacherous thoughts towards me, of all possible people, and think those to be worthy of being used to start 'something'."

"I-"

"You shall go to your husband, tell him that you miss him rather than being akin to a woman of easy dresses, and cease nagging at the fantasy of betrayal of marital bliss for the sake of selfish desire. You will be a wife, rather than a little child that cares not for duties and responsibilities to not only him, but the gods you believe upon, and start expressing your upset to him rather than tempt yourself upon a hopeless endeavor."

"B-But-"

"If you keep on nagging on the topic, I shall not rest in finding your father and privately tell him what sort of depravity you are up to. These confessions may be private by Gods' will, but these will cease to be such if you are so keen to openly disregard this trust. Understood?"

She sniffled, almost 'hurt' by such a rejection. Yet, the truth was one and the same- bitches like this are a ticking bomb ready to detonate any minute now. A harsh wake-up call is all they need to remember their places in life. Not just as a husband's wife, but as a woman of mind rather than lust.

If she is up to take such a big responsibility, then she should know better than just plotting the demise of the relationship for her pleasure and at the expense of her husband's love and mind.

She left, and I was soon sitting by the front bench before the altar. There was no Jesus' statue to look at, only the beautiful colored circular window that provided such a wonderful sight over a pleasant horizon devoid of depravity and disappointment.

It was a sight of comfort at times and-

"You are nothing! You took from me my first time, my happiness, my capacity to not fear my own fucking husband in bed, and yet you still think this is funny! You have nothing to yourself! NOTHING!"

At times, it was a mirror to myself in a way that made me… pained. Yet, it was the kind of pain that was needed. It doesn't go without a say that the path of the pious man is one of self-redemption. A priest that seeks salvation should first look into it by themselves. It's so easy to say 'sorry', but meaning it and warranting it was different.

Even now, the question of my worth on the topic was easily a dilemma needing endless talks about. But I found a chance to rest assured before the reasonable doubt of my own actions that I will find a good and deserved ending. Not the best, not the worst- the right fit for a man that reached this part of life in this world.

As I silently mired my gaze at the window, I perceived someone else sitting by the bench. Not a woman, not a man, but a boy. Pointy ears, nervous face and… a question stuttering its way out of his lips.

"A-Are you the man that has wisdom over the trouble of intimacy?"

An elf was a first to me. I knew that those existed, but rarely would one pursue to find a solution to their plight before any human church. They were keen to ask their 'nature gods' and, in some ironic circumstances, said gods were signs of a natural disaster soon to happen.

Still, their matriarchal society tended to lead to some awkward circumstances in regard to how magic 'characterizes' their male elves. This one was clearly a boy, but he had quite the feminine traits that could make some mistake him as a girl.

So, for an elf as young as this one to seek guidance in my church… well…

"That would be a way to address me, yes. I am Father Takao- what's your name, child?"

Gulping nervously, the boy answered. "C-Conall."

"Nice to meet you. How may I help you?"

"It's… words are failing me, my apologies."

I smiled kindly. "It tends to be the case for any of those struggling with those feelings. I can tell you are hurting."

He appeared stunned. "I-Is it so visible? Is my face such an open book to one's eyes?"

"Only to those that either felt it, dealt it, or just are familiar enough with it," I assured him. "So, how about you start with your situation in a more 'positive' way?"

It took him a moment to understand what I meant and he started to speak once more.

"I am part of a small colony of elves near this village. I would usually visit for trade purposes, but I have been hearing of this church and… I know this may sound weird but… I like her. I just think my love would hurt her."

I blinked at the peculiar choice of words. "How so?"

"I… She is not married and she decided against settling with a husband, but she seeks closeness with males."

I hummed, curious and yet too precautious to build an assumption this early on.

"Does she have a particular preference in the males she pursues?"

He slowly nods. "She likes them… young."

Children, a shotacon. I leaned back, staring at the ceiling.

"Does she make it clear she is not looking into anything binding?"

"She does… and that's the issue for me."

"You seek closeness to her, and yet you know she has already rejected you without even telling you."

"Y-Yes."

"Conall, you have been a most open fellow in this confession, but do you believe there is a reason why you came seeking guidance?"

"...Wh-What?"

"I am not doubting your interest to find an answer, but I am merely curious. Have you spoken with her about this?"

He nodded. "Yes-"

"And she refused you."

"Y-Yes."

"So, you already know that, while she may offer you the passing pleasure of intimacy without the binding chains of passionate affection, you are not content with it. How come?"

"I…" He closed his eyes for a moment, mustering a serious look and then answering. "I want more. I want to love her, I want her to love me and… and she doesn't see it! She just laughs at me and says that I am being childish- I am young, yes, but I am not stupid."

"You are not," I assured him while patting his back. "And she is clearly not treating you with respect."

"Y-Yes-" He agreed, but I wasn't done yet.

"So, why would you really want to be with her if what she looks out from someone like you is someone that can please her and only her?"

Conall sniffed. "She says… nice things. While we do it."

"Women tend to do so. Likewise, many men would return the compliments used- it's a common trait when one engages in intimacy."

"I… I just want to know why. Why I like her when she is so- so-"

"So controlling?" I guessed and he nodded. "It is this, maybe. You seek someone that can be confident in a partner, something that is not truly that common in many female elves. You would probably have some luck with those elves that have active duties and are hunters or pathfinders. Individuals that provide you with a sense of assurance in their self-control and confidence rather than being just a soft meek lady."

He bowed his head, blushing a bit. "I-Is that really it? Control?"

"Many men tends to want to be dominant in a relationship, but there are some that are keen to pursue… more equal exchanges. You thought this woman could give you that, but she is a dominant figure and seeks to clearly turn you and those that pursue her beautiful self as submissive mates. You are not submissive."

He chuckled nervously. "R-Really? I am not? But- But I just-"

"You are young and inexperienced. When young, people are quite confident with life- older age gives you a sense of jaded perspective. You can be happy, but you would also know that there is a catch to it. Not all gold is within reach without hard work and the kind of precious metal within grasp and with minimal effort will always be the kind of trick to lure in naive fools."

Conall nodded at this, and then looked up.

"I should find someone else. Someone reliable but… someone that cares for me."

I nodded in agreement and he offered a smile.

"Thank you, Father Takao. This… I know this doesn't solve everything, but it gives me something to think about."

"I am glad to hear this, but remember one thing, Conall, Temptation is always around the corner. You may be pulled back in that group with some lies. She may tell you she wants to change, but promises without action are as worthless as mere rocks."

He double-nodded at this. "I will not. I- I will no longer be her slave. Thank you!"

He bolted away, leaving me smiling as I could tell I did something not many priests have the chance to be subjected to. Elvish thankfulness, it was such a rare occurrence nowadays with how some settlements had grown hostile to their 'reverse harem harlots' phenomenon threatening to spread in weaker villages.

Not this one, I could tell this much.

While peace reigned once more in Ilford, my hopes for a serene stay here were briefly interrupted by a single notice from the guards as a messenger was sent for a large detachment of troops to be sent to reinforce the local garrison as a dragon has been spotted, and it seems to be one of those 'rare' human-hoarders.

This was going to be a rough few days…


AN

Next time, Dommy Mommy Dragon MILF vs. Retired Ugly Bastard turned Good Priest of the Barrier-Spam Kind.