Harriette was making her way back home, she'd missed the Dursley's picking Dudley up and she was in trouble for being late. Vernon wasn't home yet, and so Harriette's punishment was to pick something up from Mr. Dresel. He watched her sometimes when Ms. Figg was sick and he would help Petunia and Vernon with tools. Vernon and him seemed to get along, but he wasn't as angry with Harriette as Vernon was. Harriette wondered what she didn't do around him that she did around Vernon to make him angry. Maybe if she could copy her behavior at Mr. Dresel's, Vernon wouldn't be so mad, and he might even pat her on the head and say she did a good job. She'd have to perfect it though, since she always seemed to mess up no matter what with Vernon. She'd do better next time. She mastered the dishes Petunia taught her, she was good at the rest of the house chores, she even learned the sewing thing Petunia had demanded she learn, maybe she was finally doing good enough for them to love her too.

She looked down at the (tool) that she'd been asked to fetch from Mr. Dresel. She'd be able to fix the thing Vernon wanted fixed with it. She adjusted her hold. Almost excited to get to work. She was being a good girl, and she was going to do a good job. She had to fight the urge to skip. Vernon hated it when she skipped, he said only girls skipped. Maybe if she was good enough he'd let her act like a girl, right now she couldn't skip though.

She got to the door and crouched to get the key they kept under a secret rock. Harriette wasn't allowed to have a house key. Freaks didn't have houses after all. Sometimes when Vernon was really mad at her and none of the neighbors and Aunt Petunia were around he'd kick her out and take the key inside and lock all the doors and windows. He'd tell her that she wasn't wanted and that he hoped she'd get hit by a car. But Harriette was doing so well that he hadn't done that recently! She must be getting better.

She smiled, maybe she'd be so good that they'd even be happy to let her stay, let her have a house key like Dudley had. Would be happy to let her call this her home. Maybe she'd be so good that they'd even be happy to call her family. She could do it, she'd work really really hard. Then Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia and even Dudley were sure to like her.

She opened the front door and heard a crash. She flinched, wondering what she'd done to make Vernon mad already. She'd just come in, she was doing good. She'd done Dudley's homework, she'd scrubbed the floor and done the dishes and she'd even weeded the garden. She even got the tool just like she was told to. Tears already pricking her eyes, she put the tool down and went toward the living room. It was always best to be close by when she was called but she didn't want to be holding the tool, she didn't want to get hit with it, or worse be accused of planning something with it. She made her way to the room where Aunt and Uncle Vernon kept some stuff, stuff that Vernon really liked too. Harriette felt like she was getting smaller, she curled in on herself to protect herself. The front room is just a hall, with the stairs where her cupboard was in it and doors to the rest of the house. Harriette was shaking as she got closer to the living room, there was another crash, this time something wood was broken. She flinched. She really really didn't want to get hit by whatever had broken, but she was sure she would. Another crash, this time another glass thing, it sounded like it crashed up high though. Then she heard sobbing, Dudley was crying. Why was Vernon mad at Dudley? Sometimes Uncle Vernon got mad at Aunt Petunia, but Harriette couldn't remember him ever being mad at Dudley. Whenever Uncle Vernon got mad at Aunt Petunia he was always meaner to Harriette. She swallowed, she couldn't imagine how mean he'd be to her if he was mad at Dudley. She could already feel the bruises and the hunger pains. He might even break a bone this time. Dudley shrieked as something hit the ground, Harriette couldn't stop herself. Dudley may be mean to her but he was her cousin and he was still the nicest to her. He even let her eat veggies from his plate.

Harriette stood in the open doorway frozen. Not sure what to make of what she was seeing. Dudley was alone in the room. Shaking on the ground covering his head with his arms. While things floated around the room. Mostly lighter stuff, some of it was broken. Something almost hit Dudley and Harriette got in between them.

"Stop it!" Harriette said, and everything fell to the ground. A few of Aunt Petunia's favorite vases breaking.

"Harriette?" Dudley said. Harriette looked at him. He looked so sad, and a little hopeful. He opened his mouth but Harriette found herself speaking first.

"Are you alright? What happened? I just came in and heard a crash. How long has this been happening? Did you do it? You had to have, I wasn't even here." Dudley burst into tears.

"I'm a freak," Dudley said. Harriette's heartbroke. Dudley was always a brash, harsh, but energetic boy. He may be a jerk but he was still her cousin, and he was going to get kicked out of the house. He'd get hit and locked up and yelled at. Uncle Vernon might even take them out of school, and move them somewhere remote where they could be locked up properly. Uncle Vernon was always threatening that with her. Aunt Petunia always argued that Dudley needed to go to school and that put a stop to it, but now Dudley was a freak too. Harriette couldn't live with that.

"No you're not," Harriette said. "It's my fault!"

"Bu-but you said-" Harriette interrupted Dudley before he could continue.

"I came back and- and you lost your video game cause I distracted you, then you started hitting me, and then I made the room mess up!" Harriette said.

"What?"

"Go to your room, when Aunt or Uncle come home you run down stairs and tell them that's what happened!" Harriette said.

"But-"

"No buts, move it!" Harriette said. "I gotta start cleaning up this mess. Maybe if I fix some of the vases Aunt Petunia won't get as mad at me for breaking them."

"Harriette?"

"Go. Up. Stairs! And remember to cry when you tell Aunt Petunia or Uncle Vernon what I did." Harriette said. She got to work cleaning up. Looks like she wasn't going to be loved yet, but she couldn't let them know that Dudley was a freak too. She had to help Dudley, he was her cousin and he needed help. Aunt Petunia would hate having to live out in the country cause of the two freaks she got stuck with. Harriette was used to being a freak anyway.

Harriette sniffled, she wasn't a very good girl. But maybe she could settle for being a good cousin.

Harriette was hungry, and really really really thirsty. It hurt to swallow. She was covered in bruises, and she was pretty sure her arm was broken. At least it wasn't too hot or cold yet so her cupboard wasn't the worst place to get stuck in. Her stomach growled, something gnawing on her insides made her whimper. She didn't regret taking the blame for Dudley, every time she thought about it she thought about his tear streaked face. She smiled, her cracked lip opening up and bleeding. She'd cry but she was sure she didn't have any water. She wasn't even sure how long it had been. Only being able to judge the time based off of Vernon coming and going. If she had to guess it had been about two weeks, she wondered what they were saying to the school. She was probably going to get into trouble for that too. She curled into herself more tightly, ignoring the growl in her stomach. It was so bad she was sure she'd die, and she couldn't think about anything else either.

Harriette was seated at the table drawing. Mr. Dressel always let Harriette use his drawing stuff. He called it that. His drawing stuff. Harriette wished she could have her own drawing stuff. It'd be so neat.

Mr. Dressel was watching her, Mrs. Figgs wasn't feeling well today. And Uncle Vernon, Aunt Petunia and Dudley were going out for something. Maybe it was one of Dudley's friends' birthdays, or another one of Uncle Vernon's work things. Harriette didn't need to know so she shouldn't have even bothered to ask, but she had and it had made Uncle Vernon mad. Aunt Petunia stopped him before he could hit her again though. Saying they'd miss the thing. They wouldn't be able to have Mr. Dressel watch her and a bunch of other stuff, so they'd left. Uncle Vernon saying he'd punish her afterwards, but if she was lucky he'd have such a good day that he would forget about it. Harriette hoped he would even if it was a bad thing to do.

Dudley used to brag about being allowed to go, before he learned he was also a freak. It had been a little over a month since the discovery and neither had spoken of it. Though Dudley had been a bit nicer to Harriette. He mostly avoided her now anyways.

Harriette was almost finished with the drawing, she was really proud of it. It was a pretty spider, all brown and hairy like her friend, she was getting old and was having babies soon so she'd be gone soon, but she'd been a really good friend to Harriette so she wanted to have a picture to remember her by. And she wanted to show her babies. She wished Aunt Petunia had pictures of her Mumma. She didn't even know what her Momma looked like.

Just that she'd married her father and died. He'd been bad and made her momma bad and so now they were gone. But Mrs. Spider wasn't bad, her momma died having her and she was dying now having her babies. So Harriette wanted the babies to have at least one picture of their Mummy, even if Harriette wasn't a very good artist. Still she had to do her best since she couldn't take a picture of her. Freaks aren't allowed to have cameras. Harriette added the last strand of brown hair, then held up her picture. Harriette really loved spiders, they ate the mean bitey bugs and never bothered Harriette. Harriette wasn't allowed to have friends at school and she spent most of the time in the cupboard so the spiders that shared the space with her were her only friends. Sometimes she made up stories about them. About their lives and what they might be thinking. But mostly she liked to think about how it would be to be a spider. To not think, to make pretty webs and eat and sleep and drink her fill. To not want to be outside the cupboard, to be safe inside and not trapped there. Yeah Harriette likes spiders.

"Whatchya drawing there kiddo?" Mr. Dressel asked.

"Ms. Spider," Harriette said, showing him her work.

"Um," He looked, not happy. What did Harriette do wrong? He didn't like her drawing.

"I'm sorry," Harriette said. "I'll- I'm finished so I'll put it away." Harriette tried. "Please don't be mad. I won't draw her- them again. I- I'm sorry. Please don't be made. I-I-I'll be good I swear." Harriette curled in on herself, desperately trying to hide her drawing. "Please don't take it away. It's a gift. I'll draw cute things from now on… I promise." Harriette sobbed. Mr. Dressel stepped back away from her. Harriette cried even harder. "Please don't hate me… I'll be good. I won't draw anymore bad stuff. I didn't know it was bad. Please- please."

Harriette wasn't sure how she ended up in the yard, sitting on number two private drive waiting for her Aunt, Uncle and Cousin to come back. She was certain it had something to do with spiders.

Harriette curled in on herself under the stairs, she didn't know why she was such a bad kid or an awful, ugly worthless freak. If she hadn't been born, maybe her parents would still be alive. Probably not Uncle Vernon said they were bad people who made everyone hate them and drank and got into a car crash and killed another perfectly good family probably.

If she wasn't born maybe Uncle Vernon would get that promotion at work that he'd been trying for. He'd be able to invite colleagues over at least.

Aunt Petunia wouldn't have to cry, or fight with Uncle Vernon all the time. Maybe she wouldn't look so sad all the time.

Dudley definitely wouldn't have an awful ugly worthless freak for a cousin. He'd be able to have his friends over all the time. He'd be able to join sports, and he'd probably be able to... He probably wouldn't be a freak. It was probably her fault.

He'd wouldn't have to be scared and could go and do…. Well, Harriette couldn't think of a lot of things. Harriette didn't know a whole lot cause she was always in trouble and so she was put in her cupboard. She sobbed.

"Why was I born?" Harriette said, tears rolling down her face. "Why did you give birth to me?" Harriette sobbed into the flat blanket that was the only thing that was truly just hers. "Why did you die and leave me all alone? Why did you have to have me? I'm always messing up and making Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia mad. I don't mean to?" Harriette sobbed even harder, unable to continue for a moment. She wasn't sure who she was talking to. Her parents were dead. They couldn't answer her. "I don't want to be a burden or a problem or a freak. I just-I-I-I-ju-usht wa-want to be-be a- a-a-a-part of a family!" Harriette didn't mean to say that last part so loud, so for a moment she laid silent, afraid to even breath, hand covering her mouth as her chest spasmed in unshed tears. When there was no sound of yelling, no stomping of angry feet down the stairs Harriette curled around herself, cuddling her blanket for dear life.

Maybe tomorrow will be better. Maybe tomorrow she'll be better.

(Dudley doesn't know Harriette is Trans- he's not deliberately deadnaming her here)

Dudley sat staring at the toy. He didn't want it anymore, but he didn't want to just throw it away either. Harry wanted it too. He'd seen the way his cousin had looked at it for a few seconds on his birthday. It was one of Dads gifts, one of the ones where he chose cost over whether or not Dudley actually liked the thing. He may have also chosen it so Dudley would taunt Harry with it. It wasn't a bad thing, he guessed. He'd played with it once though and hadn't really gotten it. It was a complicated transforming toy, with a lot of twisting parts. It came with a weapon attachment. It was pretty good quality too. Dudley picked it up and turned it over a couple of times. It had come in car form, the only reason it was in robot form was because he'd made Harry 'fix' it. He hadn't seemed to mind. A small weak smile on his face as he'd gotten to play with it. He'd even thanked Dudley for letting him try it. Dudley had tried to get the thing in car form several other times, and now the stupid thing was a little twisted. Dudley sighed.

Harry didn't have a lot of toys. Dudley had spotted Harry taking one or two of his old, broken toys out of the trash and squerreling them away in his cupboard, Dudley had even picked on him for it. Vernon had over heard and… Even though Dudley hadn't really cared about Harry that much then he never commented on it again. Vernon had even cleared Harry's closet of any 'contraband': broken toys, pencils that were practically nothing, and a handful of drawings. Dudley wondered if his father would react the same way if Dudley just handed Harry something. His mother had cried that night when Harriette was locked up and Vernon had gone out with a colleague.

He didn't want to risk doing it infront of him though. Not with something like this. He knew his mother would just accept it if he did it infront of her, probably, but he still didn't want to risk it. What if she told Vernon? What if she got mad at Harry too?

No Dudley had to make an excuse, a way of making the toy 'worthless' without actually destroying the toy. Maybe he'd have Harry clean his room and leave some broken pencils and crayons around too. He doubted Harry would just accept them if he tried to hand them over to him. Not after he'd made fun of him for it.

Harriette was doing her best to scrub the floor. Vernon was having a guest over. Someone fairly important and he can't have Harriette messing things up so she's expected to clean up the house and stay hidden in the closet. Aunt Petunia was helping a while ago but she had to go shopping to pick some stuff up. She'd turned the stove down and told Uncle Vernon all he had to do was make sure the house didn't burn down.

But he'd immediately dragged Harriette in a told her to make sure it was cooked properly, and turned it back up. Harriette had just nodded and got to work in the kitchen. Once he wasn't in the room anymore she'd checked the recipe. She'd messed up once before.

Harriette didn't mind too much this time. Dudley told her a little about the guest and they sounded really boring. Maybe Harriette would be allowed to draw in the cupboard. Unlike Dudley who had to entertain the mean guest's sons. Aunt Petunia had complained about the wife a bunch during their sewing too. Harriette wasn't envious at all of the food they were going to eat. She could smell the food from her place on the floor. Her stomach didn't rumble, it really didn't. She didn't fantasize about tasting some of the food while she cooked it. Since cooking for the party she wasn't allowed to go to had been made her job. She scrubbed the floor more fiercely. Desperately trying not to think about just letting the food burn, or using her freak powers to remove it from the oven so she didn't have to stop cleaning to get it, or just about any number of things. She was fine though. Even if she wasn't allowed to go to the party she had a new toy she could play with. Dudley had handed her his old transformer toy, she'd seen one of the cartoons. She'd been so happy she almost skipped. Then later that day when she'd been cleaning Dudley's play room she'd empty the trash to find practically a whole set of different coloring things, mostly broken crayons, but a blue pencil that was only broken in half and a brown pencil with the side cut off. And several sheets of mostly unused and only slightly crinkled paper. Dudley had also asked her to do his reading assignment and so she had that to do. Aunt Petunia had been tossing out a lot of unused batteries recently too so her little hand light would have plenty of power. She was actually kind of looking forward to it. Even if it did mean that she'd have to skip dinner.

Uncle Vernon was talking loudly at Aunt Petunia. Harriette couldn't make out all the words, but she did hear a few. He was mostly complaining about not being able to have colleagues and bosses over.

"Schmoozing is part of Networking Petunia!" he shouted a little more loudly. Harriette had been tucked away into the cupboard with a few granola bars. Dudley was upstairs, Harriette didn't know what he was doing.

"I know but we can't just invite people over to-"

"We're going to have to Petunia, and I can't have it ruining things," Vernon said. "I'm sick of missing out on the good things in life while someone lesser gets what I deserve just cause he can get the boss drunk." Vernon shouted. "I'm done. I've invited them out to drinks to keep things civil but it's not enough. I want this house spotless and that thing well behaved."

"Vernon, we just had guest-"

"Enough!" Vernon barked, causing Harriette to flinch and their light to jitter. Yelling like that usually meant Harriette was in trouble. She stuffed her drawing stuff back into their hiding spot and then turned and hid the light. Harriette knew where everything was in her little cupboard. It was better then before. Harriette had the vaguest memory of sleeping somewhere even more cramped and dark. Harriette forced herself to listen very carefully to what was going on outside. "That think is old enough to know better. It was quiet all during the dinner the other day. Smooshings an important part of the job Petunia. Now, either convince Alex that what he saw was his imagination or get that freak to behave itself." Their was stomping, Vernon made his way from his through the hall, Harriette instinctively shrunk away from the door to her cupboard, past Harriette's room and up their stairs. Uncle Vernon Stomped a little louder on the steps that were above Harriette's room. Harriette listened carefully for a moment. There was nothing but silence. Just when she was about to relax and start drawing again Harriette heard Aunt Petunia's softer foot steps. Harriette didn't like when her aunts footsteps sounded like that. It always twisted up her heart to hear her Aunt who was always so lively get small and quite. Aunt Petunia knocked on Harriette' cupboard door.

"Harriette?" Aunt Petunia said, voice soft. When Uncle Vernon was around Aunt Petunia was a lot rougher, often hammering on the door to Harriette's cupboard. This was the softer tone that her Aunt had when they were going to do some sewing, or gardening, or cooking together. Sometimes Aunt Petunia would put on some music and they'd pretend they were other people for a while. Harriette wasn't sure who they were pretending to be but Aunt Petunia was always a little happier when they pretended. Harriette likes pretending.

The weather was getting warmer. Aunt Petunia kept saying you could tell that spring was around the corner and sighing. It would be here soon. Dudley and Harriette would both turn six in the summer this year, but only Dudley would actually get a birthday. Harriette didn't know exactly when her birthday was. She didn't know if she'd ever been celebrated before. Probably not, since no one celebrates freaks. If Dudley was ever caught he wouldn't be celebrated either. Harriette didn't think that was fair, she'd never been celebrated but Dudley had literally never not been celebrated in his whole life. She wondered how it felt to be waiting for your life as you knew it to end.

Harriette was used to being a freak, being treated badly. She'd for a while convinced herself maybe she deserved it. Sometimes she didn't but mostly she did.

Right now though Harriette and Petunia were cleaning up the garden. Checking the flowers, making sure the grass was right. Petunia would sometimes ignore the fact that Harriette accidentally made the flowers bright, or the grass greener, or a plant to stand straighter. Sometimes she'd even tell Harriette she did a good job. Harriette was sure she noticed. Harriette had to watch Petunia throw out an entire collection of flowers once, and Harriette had felt so bad for them that she'd accidentally started making the plants healthier. Harriette had thought the first few times that the mistake had gone unnoticed but Harriette had caught Aunt Petunia with a funny little smile on her face when she'd done it once. It was their little secret. If it was dark and no one was around, Aunt Petunia would pretend not to see Harriette make flowers look a little bit prettier and Harriette would pretend not to feel a little bit proud of herself for it.

They'd been coming over a lot recently. Harriette was currently tucked away in her cupboard, she'd turned off her light because they were still in the hallway right now. Her hand rested on it as she waited, holding her breath, and listened to the conversation going on outside.

"The food smells delicious Petunia," the woman Harriette didn't know the name of, she'd decided office lady was as good a title as any.

"Thank you," Aunt Petunia said.

"Can I take your coat," Dudley said, like he'd been forced to practice a million times, even though he'd already practiced a million times before they'd first come over.

"Now why don't I show you to the garden," Petunia said. Harriette could picture her gesturing toward the garden. "We've put a lot of work into it, once you're seated I'll pour you some tea. It's just devine I assure you." Harriette felt a little swell of pride at that.

She'd worked really hard to perfect the blend of herbs that Aunt Petunia had started having her grow along with the flowers, the perfect amount of honey versus sugar to add, the perfect temperature, to get the flavors right. Aunt Petunia had decided randomly one afternoon to start growing their own herbs. She'd convince Uncle Vernon to allow her to set aside the space for it by saying it would lessen the price and all the things she could do with it. Harriette had been brought on to help her build the small kitchen garden as Aunt Petunia had called it. Some of the herbs grew up among the other plants too, but most of the non or less flowering kind was kept to the kitchen garden. Harriette had worked really hard on it. Petunia had mostly stopped now. Harriette was fine with that. She liked being outside. Harriette turned on her little hand light and started reading as best she could.

Dudley was staring at Harriette, Harriette shifted. They were at the kitchen table doing their homework. Well, Harriette was trying to do her homework and Dudley was staring at her. Harriette shifted again.

"Your hairs the same length as Nancy's," Dudley stated. Harriette looked up at him then back down to think, chewing a little on her lower lip. She guessed she kind of did. Nancy was a girl in their class. She was the oldest kid in class because her birthday was actually right after school started. She was nice, but a little bossy and she liked to roughhouse. She'd also been really proud of her long brown hair, but one day her younger brother, also in their class, decided that he was mad at her and put gum in her hair. She'd cried and had to get the gum cut out, her parents had to take her to a hairdresser to style it, but it had still ended up really short and not very girly. Harriette felt bad for her. She'd been really angry about it ever since, and would cry if anyone brought it up. She'd loved having her mother do her hair in a different way everyday, before it had been chopped off, but her mum was apparently not as good with short hair.

Harriette nodded.

"Yeah, I-I guess," Harriette said, running a hand through her short mop.

"Can I- would it be alright if I practiced something," Dudley said. Harriette tilted her head. She could probably get away with saying no, but she didn't want to push it. "So, I fancy Nancy," he made a face. "I didn't mean to rhyme that. Anyway you know what that means right." Harriette nodded, even though she really didn't. It must have shown on her face. "It means that I think she's; pretty, and smart and nice and I want to spend a lot of time with her." Dudley said. "I get weird butterflies in my stomach and my heartbeats really fast." He looked to Harriette. Harriette had never felt anything like that. It sounded kind of unpleasant. Harriette nodded. "So, I want to do something nice for her, and you know how she was saying how she hated her short hair and wanted to do it differently?" Harriette nodded, remembering the time Nancy had cried, and said short hair was a boy cut. Harriette had never really forgiven her for it, but she did feel bad for her. "So, I wanted to try and practice doing hair," Dudley said. "I found a bunch of tutorials on short hair. No one has to know and you don't have to keep your hair-"

"Okay!" Harriette said, excited. She was going to get a girl hair style. She was really excited. Dudley nodded.

Dudley and Harriette were in the bathroom, Harriette was leaned back over the sink while Dudley poured warm water over her hair. Rinsing out the suds from the shampoo conditioner combo Petunia used.

"Your hair should be easier to work with now that it's clean, I think," Dudley said looking over the video he was studying to learn to do short hair. "Oh, it looks like it'll be easier to get the suds out if I use my hands." Dudley, starting to work and glowering at the screen. "Oh, wait, I should have the water running over your hair?" He half mumbled. Readjusting Harriette's head to try and get her hair under the faucet.

"Who'd have thought doing hair was so difficult," Harriette said.

"Yeah," Dudley said, continuing his efforts to clear the suds from her hair. "Alright, it looks like I got the suds out." He said, pulling Petunia's hair drier toward them, and turning it on. They spent another few minutes blow drying Harriette's hair while he mumbled. "So, it says that hair tends to be easier to work with while slightly damp. Oh, I think I'm supposed to pat dry some of it…?" then a few seconds later. "Wait, I'm supposed to comb it while blow drying it…" Another moment. "Wait, have I been doing it wrong the whole time… No wait I- I think it's fine?" He grumbled. "Does it hurt?"

"N-no I don't think so," Harriette said, trying not to move. Dudley had gotten one of his combs out and was smoothing it through Harriette's hair. The bit that Harriette could see made her happy, even if he couldn't get her hair to cooperate properly. "So, do you think Nancy will even let you do her hair?"

"I dunno, I'll have to figure that out later," Dudley said. "For instance if I made a boy look all pretty maybe she'd like to try it."

"But I'm not a boy," Harriette mumbled.

"Oh?" Dudley asked. "I thought you were, Dad's always calling you 'boy' this and 'boy' that. I guess I just assumed."

"Well, I was born a boy," Harriette said. "But I- I just am a girl." Harriette tried to explain.

"Oh, okay," Dudley said. "So, I'm helping you, and you wouldn't mind looking like a girl at school cause you are one right."

"Uh-huh," Harriette said.

"Cool," Dudley said. "Anyway, it says that I might have to hold the hair tightly. It might cause some pulling."

"Okay," Harriette said.

"Alright," Dudley said. "I'm glad that I'm helping you. Now even if Nancy doesn't let me do her hair, it won't be as much a waste."

"I don't know, I think that maybe, time you enjoy spending isn't really wasted," Harriette said. "So, if you enjoy doing this or like the results yourself even if no one else does that's fine."

"Huh," Dudley said. "Why do you think that?"

"I dunno, I mean- how do you- life's not good sometimes, so you- you kinda gotta live with that, so you gotta take whatever good stuff you can get. Like the smell of trees on a walk, or the way light catches in the sprinklers, or I dunno. Sometimes you just gotta cause life's not very nice. So you gotta make your own good sometimes. I guess."

"I- I think that it's very smart."

"Not really," Harriette said, feeling a little sad. "It's just that you gotta."

"That doesn't mean it's not smart, it's brilliant actually," Dudley assured.

"Re-really," Harriette said.

"Yeah," Dudley said. "Even still, I like that I can make my cousin feel pretty."

"Thank you," Harriette said. "Do you think I'll really look like a real proper girl with this hair?"

"I'm sure of it," Dudley said. "The only difference between a girl and a boy is that girls have nicer hair."

"Older girls wear make-up," Harriette pointed out.

"But that's older girls," Dudley said. "There are a lot more differences between older girls and older boys than younger girls and younger boys."
"Really?"

"Yeah, you stick to yourself all the time so you probably didn't notice, but it's true," Dudley said. "Younger girls and older girls are just as different from each other as boys and girls."

"Hmm," Harriette said. "That makes sense." she could feel herself smile, as she looked up at her cousin. He looked surprised but smiled back.

"Alright, it actually looks like I should be…Working from the back of your head?" Dudley said, turning to the screen. "Won't that just make your hair messier?"

"Well, we should start by listening to the adults," Harriette said. "After all, kids who don't listen get hurt." Harriette frowned, remembering all the times she couldn't listen and thus got into trouble.

"I-Yeah, I guess," Dudley said. "They are the experts at least." for a while they were mostly silent as Dudley copied what he saw on the phone screen. Harriette's hair became soft, fluffy and nearly dry. Dry enough to start working to braid it. Dudley worked diligently and Harriette sat still as a child of only five possibly could. She did wonder if she would look cute, would she look stylish, would she feel pretty? The bathroom door opened and both of them flinched looking up to see Petunia. Who was standing just staring at the two.

"We-We're not- It's not, I want to- well- there's a girl and-" Dudley stuttered, eyes darting to his cousin. Hair messy in parts, shoulders having gone from relaxed to hunched up to her ears. "I'm forcing Harriette to help me!" Dudley stated. Harriette would probably have to take the blame for a lot of his 'freak' so he should protect her from getting hurt from things like this.

"Just make sure to clean this mess up," Petunia sighed, turning around to close the door. Harriette squeaked out a sad sounding affirmative.

"Ye-yes Aunt Petunia," Harriette said, relaxing and deflating at the same time.

"Harriette?" Dudley started reaching for her. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine,' Harriette said, sniffling. "I just-" She lifted her head. She'd insisted on keeping her bangs out of whatever hairstyle Dudley decided on, so that they'd cover the scar on her forehead, so her hair had been covering her face from Dudley's view. But even though Dudley was still young and Harriette smiled, Dudley could tell that Harriette wanted to cry.

Harriette was looking through the store shelf for the specific brand that was on Her Aunt and Uncle's list. Uncle Vernon kicked her out of the house. Telling her to buy the stuff on his list and not to come back till she at least got everything on it. Harriette grumbled, she'd been looking forward to tonight a lot too.

That's because Uncle Vernon was Schmoozing his boss tonight. He'd been doing it for a while now, but mostly by taking them to nice places, now that Harriette was old enough to be out of the way he was starting to have them over more. Meanwhile Harriette had decided that days they were over were the best days since she was left alone in her cupboard and everyone was too busy to notice her little hand light. She wasn't sure what made Vernon decide he needed her out of the house, but she didn't want to make him angry. So she read the list with slightly squinting eyes as she tried making sure she got everything on the list. Petunia had gone out to pick up something or other in a different store. Harriette had been forced to walk to the grocers on her own, so she couldn't ask her Aunt what the word was or what type of jar she was supposed to look for. She didn't even know why he'd needed these things so badly, since all the food was cooked. Harriette groaned, then puffed air out to try and get her hair out of her eyes, her glasses kept the worst of it but it was still hard to work with it. She groaned, settling down on the ground for a moment head buried in her knees and arms wrapped around it all to close her off from the outside world. It wasn't the safest thing to do but the lights were too bright and the buzzing was starting to make her sick. She needed a moment to herself. She wished she was tucked into her cupboard. It was safe and the light their was warm and Ms. Spider Junior was there. Harriette groaned standing. Grabbing a random jar with the right word. It was probably the wrong one but she'd be able to get back into her cupboard and then she could draw, Uncle Vernon wouldn't have time to punish her more than just locking her up. Dudley would share his lunch with her tomorrow, so being forced to skip breakfast or dinner wouldn't be the worst. She huffed before getting to the counter. Setting everything out on it and then bills that Vernon had given her. She shifted as the woman rang up the items and counted the bills. The calculator wasn't showed that it wasn't enough, five dollars short. Harriette would have to put something back, her heart picked up pace and tears pricked her eyes, she took a deep shaky breath. She wiped her nose on her sleeve and reached for one of the items.

"Hold on," the woman said, pulling out a piece of paper, no, three pieces of paper. It wasn't money. Oh, a coupon. The woman scanned the coupon. The five missing dollars were cleared. Harriette let out a breath she hadn't realized she was holding.

"Good luck kid," the woman said.

"Thank you," Harriette said. Taking the bag from the woman. Now that the woman had spoken Harriette recognized her. She was the worker who'd let Harriette sleep in the employee break room a few times. Her hair and eyes were a different color. Harriette didn't know that you could change you eye color. The woman used to have brown eyes, now she had yellow eyes. Her hair used to be blue but now it was a bright happy pink. She also didn't have her piercings in. "What happened to your piercings?" Harriette asked. "I didn't recognize you?" Harriette moved to let anyone who would use the check out, but the place was empty at that moment.

"Oh, the boss said the piercings were unprofessional and were upsetting to the usual customers," The woman rolled her eyes. "She's cool though, and said I could keep my hair dye routine and contacts."

"Contacts?"

"You didn't think my eyes turned yellow did you?"

"Um… No," Harriette said, uncertain .

"Contacts cover your eyes, they can be used to change your eyes color and help you see, Some even do both?"

"Oh," Harriette said, putting her hand to her own rounded glasses. Uncle Vernon hadn't really wanted to get them for her, but Aunt Petunia said they needed them for school. It'd be to much trouble to have her be blind. "I think they make you look cool."

"Thank you," the woman said. Harriette chewed her lip a second before speaking.
"I gotta go, it was nice to see you," Harriette said. She opened her mouth before closing, she got smaller, sadder for a second, then smiled still sad.

"Good luck kiddo," she said. "Be safe, and remember I'm on shift okay." Harriette nodded, relief lessening the knot in her stomach. Even though she wasn't sure she'd need to come here, but it was always nice to have a safe place to hide on days Uncle Vernon decided to kick her out.

"Thanks for the help," Harriette said.

"It's not much," she said. They both waved and Harriette headed out.

As Harriette made her way back to the Private drive she checked and rechecked her list and the items she got. She was pretty certain that she'd collected the entirety of what she'd been sent out for. She let out a sigh of restrained relief. She was a good girl, she did good. She was good, she'd gotten what she was asked for. Harriette tried to relax but she couldn't help the growing dread. She was sure she'd mess something up, she always seemed to.

Harriette adjusted her shirt, it was oversized, one of Dudley's older ones. He was starting to be gentler with his clothes now but this one still had a big whole in the front, and was stained really bad. Still Harriette tried her best to look presentable, or feel presentable at least. She doubted she'd ever be actually presentable, freaks weren't presentable. Harriette spotted the car in the drive too late. Harriette still tried to duck behind a bush to avoid being spotted. It was a really shiny car, light colored; a rich person car. That's what Uncle Vernon would call it. And it was sitting in her Aunt and Uncle's driveway. Right next to Uncle Vernon's, still nice, but not as nice car. Harriette thought they looked pretty similar. Both were: shiny, and curved but also kind of boxy, both were clean, and neither had any scratches or dents. Though the 'rich person' car was a little slimmer, and wavy and the color of vinela bean ice cream, where as Vernon's was black and boxier. Harriette didn't see anyone in the car, but she still was careful to stay behind the bushes to get closer to the house. Rather then go to the door, she crept to the front window, the curtains weren't drawn but the blinds were mostly closed except a very, very slender crack between the sill and the blinds bottom part. Uncle Vernon had bought them a bit too small but was too cheap to buy new ones no matter if Aunt Petunia complained. Harriette tilted her head back to pear through the small crack, grateful that Uncle Vernon had refused. Harriette could see the livingroom and a bit of the kitchen from where she crouched and if she adjusted her positions she could see more of the inside. The owner of the car, at least Harrittte guessed he was the owner, was seated at the table Uncler Vernon was chatting nicely to him. Schmoozing, the man had a matching wife and son. The boy was a perfect mix of the two even in color. Harriette debated making her way to her cupboard and hoping to slip in unnoticed. She thought about just waiting outside or at the store till the couple was gone. Harriette thought about doing a lot of things, until Ms. Figg spotted her.

"Harry," the woman called, and Harriette turned around worriedly hiding her grocery shopping behind her back as if it was some grave sin. "What are you doing out here so late?" the woman asked. "What you got there behind your back?"

"I was asked to do some shopping," Harriette said, finally showing the woman.

"Ah, well, why are you standing about then?" The woman said, the image of confusion. Harriette swallowed, looking around as if she could find some sort of escape, but Ms. Figg was already heading toward the door to the house. She gestured for Harriette to follow her and Harriette despondent, obeyed. Head hung low as she made her way next to the older woman. She knocked, a little harder than Harriette thought was necessary. There was a long, long pause before the door opened and Aunt Petunia peaked out. She sighed before continuing.

"Thank you Ms. Figg," she said, gesturing Harriette forward, Harriette had barely taken a step before Aunt Petunia was tugging her inside. The two moved quickly and quietly, Harriette practically diving for the sanctuary of her cupboard. Heart pounding, the two exchanged looks while Aunt Petunia took the shopping from Harriette and shut the door. Harriette buried her face into her blanket and flat pillow and let out the softest sighs of relief that she'd ever heard. She turned to Ms. Spider and whispered.

"That was really scary," Harriette settled into her little cupboard for the night.