Hello :P It is Wednesday and I am back with a new chapter! When telling the story of Justin and Eli and a good chunk of their arc together, I often focus on when they live together one summer and end up as boyfriends. That is, after all, a huge point in what makes them - them. However, this one focuses on a different time. The truth is, they actually had romantic relationships the year prior but for an even shorter time and much more "casually". Casually is a loose word. You'll see from this chapter that feelings for one and other were there. And certainly desperate to blossom when they had the chance the following year. I hope you enjoy :3
Ages:
Justin: 21
Eli: 34
Disclaimer: I own the story and the OCs mentioned. (This chapter does focus a tiny bit on Eli hiding his sexuality but not too heavily.)
This is one of those tales that I found out about rather recently, in fact. If I had known of it when it was going on, I would have had a good couple of things to say. But that's not really the point of all this, is it? It is my job to tell everything to and capture the way things were – how things felt - rather than focusing on what should have or shouldn't been. So I shall begin.
The deep purple haired male had one thing and one thing alone on his mind as he stuck the key in through the door of his family home and he let himself back in as quietly as he could. He tried to steer his mind elsewhere. He tried to focus on the good times that had been. But still, try as he might, the eldest Morgan son had one thing on his mind only. He had one person on his mind only. And he was greatly looking forward to seeing his face once more, even if it was just for one second.
He did manage to cast his mind behind him and indeed think of some of the good times that he had just had, as well as the laughs also. He showed off a bit of a smirk and a grin to himself as he shook his head and shut the front door behind him before reaching down for his heeled and steel capped boots. Yes, he had had a good time. But he was happy to be home also. And he hoped to have just one more good time before he tucked down for the night.
Justin finally managed to tug his black and silver decorated boots off of his narrow feet without making too much noise apart from one of them slipping out of his grip and the heel clunking on the wooden floor with one particular noise. But he supposed that that didn't really matter.
Though it was nearing the later parts of the night, he was almost certain that some people would be awake. His father most definitely. His littlest sister too! Her meadow orbs were likely to be open if their lavender haired fathers were as well.
Not that this really mattered to Justin. Not that this really mattered to Justin at all. For once, it wasn't his intention to head on down the hallways to his parents room and let them know that he was home safe and to say a face to face goodnight to them. He did intend to do that at some point. But for the time being he shook his head all over again and that time was to almost clear his attention out before he tilted his head, listening out.
The deep purple haired male began listening out for the sounds of the Morgan Mansion, past all the usual clunking and banging and creaking noises that came with the natural character of their home. He could hear a distant hum of chattering quietly down the halls where the bedrooms were but that wasn't the thing that he was listening out for.
No, what he was listening out for was something that couldn't really be heard. In fact, he needed to listen more with the chest and the mind rather than the ears. He needed to figure out where the older male was going to be. And as well as this, he needed to wonder to himself whether he wanted to see him as badly as the deep purple haired male wanted to see him.
Biting his lip but in an absentminded way rather than a nervous one, Justin finally stepped away from the front door mat and where he had discarded his boots and he left his leather jacket on as he made his way through his family home with the intention of being very quiet indeed. After all, it was past bed time for most of the residence. And he had found himself being more conspicuous in recent moments.
Running a hand through his hair, Justin began to make his way past all of the bedrooms in the hallway of Jessie and James' property and he could hear more prominently the quiet chattering sounds coming from various bedrooms. But still, that wasn't where his chest or his mind or his ears were honed into. The deep purple haired male was intending to make a right turn and walk completely past his younger siblings' bedrooms to head to the annexe of Jordan and Lynne.
Yes, that's where his special someone was most likely to be found. After all, he was staying with them even though he had ended up sleeping over with Justin a great deal also.
And despite the fact that Justin knew this as well as anybody (the most out of everybody), he suddenly got the inclination to make a sharp right turn rather than a left one. It was still a quiet one. He still didn't raise any attention at all. The most attention that he raised was within himself.
For half a moment, he furrowed a brow to himself, silently wondering why he had done that. And then it dawned on him. His legs had acknowledged another, new sound and taken him in that direction before his ears and mind seemed to catch on! There was a very distant and very gentle buzz and clapping sound to boot coming from one of the living rooms of his family home.
As soon as it all began to dawn on him and for good, the deep purple haired male couldn't help but smile to himself and he smiled a different smile from the one when he had first arrived back home. It was still amused. But it had an extra dash of handsome fondness. As Justin walked, he supposed to himself – there must have been a slight argument of who got ownership of the TV that night in the Williams' Annexe and the person lounging in the Morgan Mansion had obviously lost.
Once and for all and for good, the deep purple haired male followed the noises and the intuition and he headed to find the deep violet haired male. Lo and behold he was right about everything and that smile appeared more clearly and charmingly on his face when he saw the back of the older male's head as he sat on the sofa.
And in the exact same way that the younger male had an instinct to follow his subconscious mind and chest, the Unovan male perhaps had that ability also. Barely making any noise at all – the same quietness that Justin acquired as he moved through his family home – Justin entered the room and moved behind the older male and without hesitation, he turned around. He heard him straight away. His eyes stopped focusing, transfixed on the TV. They turned to the other person in the room. And they greeted him.
"Hello darling. Good night?" the deep violet haired male spoke to the younger male and it was only in hindsight that he took notice of the unusual blandness in his voice as well as the inability to focus on him for much time at all, going back to the documentary on the television screen after just a couple of seconds.
But because the deep purple haired male was just too glad to be seeing the person that he was silently hoping to see one more time before he tucked down from the night, he didn't notice any of these things at all. Instead, he continued smiling and he began tugging his leather jacket off from his slim frame. He nodded his head at Eli even though he was no longer looking at him. He didn't hesitate to respond.
"Yeah. Yeah, really good actually, thanks. You probably noticed that I was a little reluctant to go." The eldest Morgan son continued smiling for a few more seconds and then that curve of the mouth straightened out. His eyes glinted instead, and they sparkled with the silent knowing that Eli seemed to pick up on most things with those inquisitive eyes of his. Justin could be much the same way.
However, in that instance and on that night, he didn't notice the way that Eli wasn't really staring at him much at all. It wasn't really unusual for him to not be occupied intensely by what was in front of him, far from it! But he usually did dart his eyes between something fascinating him and an actual person – out of politeness at least.
That politeness eventually came. With one single second lasting glance towards Justin and nod too and tiny upwards quirk of the mouth, Eli wordlessly responded to the younger male. Once more, the deep purple haired male didn't hold back any other responses. He continued engaging with the older male.
"How about you? What has your evening been like?" Justin asked and since his leather jacket had been tugged away from his body, he began absentmindedly folding it up into a parcel shape as he conversed with the older male. Well, he conversed with the back of his head. He wasn't really bothered, though. He continued folding up his jacket and he continued talking also, slowly going down on his knees to be more at level with Eli and referring to what was on the screen. "This new?"
Eli turned around one more time but again, just for a second or two when he felt the younger male even closer to him. But despite the fact that he didn't openly respond to this, he didn't seem offended by it either.
With eyes remaining fixed on the television screen and his hands in his lap and clutching the remote, the deep violet haired spoke and he spoke far more than he had done previously. That level and uninteresting tone still escaped his lips, though.
"No, I've seen this one quite a few times but to my memory I hadn't seen the one that was previously on." Eli uttered and the way that he was staring so straight ahead could have made one easily think that he was talking to the bunch of musicians on the screen. Even so, Justin nodded his head and allowed his chin to rest on the back of the sofa, his parcel of his leather jacket discarded there also. "I did get permission from your parents to be here, just so you know. My cousin can be impossible sometimes. I tried to tell him that his show was a definite repeat but he wasn't having any of it."
The Unovan male's voice finally changed a little towards the end of his sentences and as well as this, he turned his head to look at Justin almost directly right behind him and had a bit of a proper smirk too. You would have thought that he would have leapt at this little more of attention but he managed to stay collected.
In fact, all he did was quietly chuckle and smirk along with the older male, his chin still resting on the back of the sofa behind him. But it was then when Eli looked back at the television and the polite yet friendly conversation came to an end that the deep purple haired male decided to move on in.
The deep violet haired male could feel the movements as soon as he made them and Eli felt Justin rise from kneeling behind the sofa and returned to his full, statuesque height. Without pausing but with a quality of shy awkwardness all the same, once he had returned to his full height, Justin then craned down again and as he did so, he wrapped his arms around the older male. The crook of his arm gently squeezed around his neck, bringing him closer. Justin moved his nose in closer to his cheek and lightly inhaled but mostly played it off as talking to the Unovan male.
He still couldn't stop the smile and blush from taking over his cheeks, though. He remained embracing him, waiting for whatever the response was going to be from Eli.
"I'm glad that you had a nice evening too." The deep purple haired male told the older one simply and with no agenda on his mind as he smiled and continued holding onto the Unovan male. It was simply going to be whatever it was.
But after not many seconds at all and after Eli's eyes darted in their sockets, inwardly surprised for the first couple of moments of Justin's embrace, he then very subtly relaxed into it after he felt the deep purple haired male had checked behind him to see if anybody else was looming. There wasn't.
The deep violet haired male then let out a similar exhale to Justin's previous inhale and his sunken yet focused eyes threatened to flutter shut as he was pulled even closer. It was at the exact same moment that this happened that one of the younger male's hands stopped squeezing around Eli in a hug and they began wandering to his neck, his non-ring clad fingers starting to tiptoe over his collar bones.
All of a sudden, the Unovan male's shoulders tensed very close to where Justin's fingertips were itching to wander and he simultaneously pulled away from him and extended his chest out also, making a physical point before he even uttered a wordless one.
Needless to say though, Justin caught on to all of his actions as soon as he did them and he didn't hesitate to unwrap himself from the older male. And in spite of the fact that he then blushed for a different reason, he shook his head and corrected the situation. Adding to his height all over again, his fingers were then used to be held up, indicating no harm.
"I'm… I'm sorry. I didn't mean to come off too strong." The deep purple haired male uttered very sincerely and with slight widening eyes at the possibility that he had offended the Unovan male. To conceal the blush that was tracing along his jawline and making its way to his earlobes, Justin picked up his jacket all over again.
He lightly swallowed. And when the deep violet haired male heard this, he was encouraged to think about his own actions and he finally turned to look at the younger male properly, turning down the volume on the television too.
The deep violet haired male's eyebrows danced and then evened out and though his tone of voice remained the same and level and mundane, he paused and then he muttered. His sunken yet inquisitive orbs had obviously caught on to the way that Justin had retracted from him immediately.
"No… It's okay. I'm sorry." Eli spoke and he himself heard the way that his words came out very flatly and so he believed that the sincerity wouldn't have come across in the same way that he was feeling from the younger male. He knew that his actions had to speak louder than his words. Turning around to face Justin from the sofa, though his head was tilted slightly out of uncertainty, he added words that were on the tip of his tongue. "I just… I don't feel good about that kind of thing happening right now. To be honest with you, I don't feel good in general."
The Unovan male's voice didn't change even though he'd made the effort for his body language to do so. But maybe that was okay. Actually, it definitely was okay from the way that the deep purple haired male responded to him.
He felt as though he very quickly got over his blushing saga and mortification that he might have come across too strong and then was just filled with concern instead. But he didn't show it too dramatically on his face. All over again, he switched his own body language and discarded his parcel of jacket, resting his palms on the back of the sofa and his forearms extending. He tilted his head. He asked gently.
"Are you okay? In what way don't you feel good?" Justin wondered aloud and although the Unovan male was very unique and misunderstood in the eyes of a lot of people, there and then, the younger male seemed to read him like a book. The way that Eli shut off the television completely and his jaw tilted himself before sucking him told him everything that he needed to know. His darting yet unblinking orbs not looking at him only informed him further still. He tried not to lean closer to him even though he would have liked to. "Did something happen, Eli?"
In the past many months, Justin had gotten to know Eli as someone who could be very mysterious and closed off yet was one of the most honest and truthful people that he was beginning to know really well. And there and then and in that moment, the deep violet haired male showed off all of those qualities in concession.
Though he longed to shake his head and play his emotions off and not deal with him, there was a part of him that had grown restless with doing that and longed to mutter them. In the end, it was his honest streak that won.
And after just a single beat, Eli came out with more words.
"To be honest, something did happen." The deep violet haired male admitted and he leaned further away from the younger male as he loomed over but I get the impression that this wasn't intentional. While Justin's mind silently flicked through possibilities, Eli ran his own palm over the sides of his own shaved part of his head. He exhaled before concluding. "But it's not something that I really want to talk about."
Now, looking back a great many years after this tale took place and with my rather vast knowledge of human interactions, one could have expected Justin Morgan to get a little bit shirty with Eli after he concluded his sentences. Like Eli was displaying there and then, the deep purple haired male was one of the people who usually didn't really like to talk about their problems while they were going on. Instead, he preferred to reflect on them in hindsight and after he had overcome them.
It could have been expected that there and then Justin would get a little annoyed and impatient, despite the fact that he was often known for acting the same way. Humans could be like that! Pokémon too.
Be instead, the streak inside the eldest Morgan son that won was the appreciation that the deep violet haired male had at least been a little bit honest. He had been as honest as he could be. And that was enough for him.
So managing to conceal the silent concern that was brewing from behind his eyes, Justin chose to slowly and softly nod his head before he showed off a polite smile. He didn't move away from his position behind the sofa with his palms on the back of it and his forearms stretched out. Though in retrospect, he probably would have loved to.
Instead, he uttered back to Eli. And as he did this, he acted as naturally as he could. That was something that came easily to him anyway when he was in the presence of the older male.
"Well… One of my new vinyl records came today and I never had a chance to give it a listen. Do you want to come to my room and do that?" Justin offered in a friendly manner and started to smile too and as well as this, he absentmindedly reached for his leather jacket discarded on the back of the sofa. His movement there and then must have been an unintentional indication to Eli for something else. His shoulders tensed all over again and he looked away. Justin was forced to pull away for good in order to get his intention across. "No pressure. I'll see you there if I see you there."
And then Justin went against what would have been my better judgement if I was him and he couldn't help but reach out and pat Eli lightly on the shoulder. But that was it. Running a hand through his shorter locks and taking his black leather jacket with him, the deep purple haired male left him with the offer of not talking and just listening instead.
I don't know whether the eldest Morgan expected to be joined or not – I didn't ask him. I think that he figured that he wouldn't be joined. As well as being like him and an introspective human being, Eli was more often than not a man of his word and he liked to deal with his own things alone.
So perhaps Justin headed back to his own bedroom with this expectation of Eli and because of this, after he shut the door behind him just to even so, he had time to change into his pyjama t shirt and shorts and he had time to text his parents that he was home – as well as send a goodnight message also.
The deep purple haired male was sat on the edge of his bed and tried not to concern himself with the deep violet haired male and what was going on if he himself didn't want to talk. And he had instead reached for that new vinyl package of his when some scuffing noises could be heard approaching his bedroom and then right outside it.
For the first few half-seconds, Justin reminded himself not to believe that he would be correct in every situation. It could have very easily been one of his parents to say a face to face goodnight like they usually did or it could have been one of his younger siblings escaped from their little bedrooms!
But the deep purple haired male would soon find out that it was a person short in stature but it was very much a fully grown person. It was Eli. And he made sure to just push his head through the door and let his presence be known before he entered fully. In fact, he waited until Justin invited him all over again. The eldest Morgan son showed off a closed mouthed but dimple decorated smile and used his spare hand that had finished with opening the package to gesture for Eli to come on in.
The Unovan male seemed to not hesitate. He shut the door behind him and came to sit next to the younger male on the bed, suddenly seeming rather overdressed in one of his typical suits in comparison to Justin in his summer month pyjamas. I can't help but wonder if either of them noticed. Or were they too focused on simply the presence of each other?
Either way, the deep purple haired male continued smiling and took the final layer of film off his new vinyl purchase while Eli's sunken yet focused eyes were used there and then to curiously glance at the product in Justin's hold. The younger male didn't hesitate to speak of it, feeling as though he was managing to carry on like normal like Eli wanted.
"I can't remember if I told you that I had ordered this or not. It's a picture disc." The deep purple haired male informed him and despite the fact that this was plainly obvious just by looking, the deep violet haired male's blunt self didn't point this out.
Instead, after running his hands over the shaved parts of his hair all over again, his hands reached out and he accepted the vinyl disc by the edges when the deep purple haired male offered it to him. Justin scooted further backwards on the bed, crossing his legs as he sat down and gathering all of the plastic waste.
Eli looked at it for just a couple of seconds but it was for a good couple of seconds, I think. He nodded his head and he briefly bit his own lip before puckering it, uttering in a low-levelled and straight-levelled tone once again. He nodded his head a few times, his head tilting as he looked at the indeed picture decorated disk.
"I don't think so. It looks good though. It reminds me of the era of Misty being quite small." The Unovan male's eyes flickered with the beginnings of a smile as these words escaped his lips. Once more, the truthful and honest side couldn't help but take over. But then as soon as it did and then as soon as he did this, it was like another part inside of him snapped. Or rather, it broke. His eyelashes flickered and his mouth faltered.
Holding onto the edges of Justin's new vinyl purchase, Eli almost let it slip down to the ground like he had let those words slipped out but this wasn't why the deep purple haired male took it back from him, gently putting it down on his bed. And this wasn't the reason that he reached for the older male's hand either.
Justin had an intention of carrying on like normal and having discussions that they would usually have but from the way that Eli reacted there and there – and to words that were seemingly casual enough – the deep purple haired male felt that that would be harder and harder to do.
Out of care and concern, the eldest Morgan son held onto Eli's hand and he interlocked his fingers with his. They both breathed out. They both didn't look at one and other. They both didn't try and pull away either.
Despite the fact that the Unovan male didn't try to pull away, as he could feel the younger male's gaze flickering towards his all over again and he himself couldn't help but look up, his shoulders began to tense all over. A very stiff frown decorated between his eyebrows. He almost squirmed, though he still didn't try to pull away. He ducked his head and then he blurted out, his palm remaining pressed against the younger males.
"I don't… I don't really want to get up to any of our usual things tonight, Justin. I don't feel good about it." The deep violet haired male mumbled and then he finally pulled his hand away from the younger male. And to do that, he gripped his hand lightly around the other of Justin's and pulled the gripped one out of his.
Both of them looked away. Both of them looked away for very different reasons. It appeared as though there was a hitch in Eli's throat but he was also likely to say something else – another apology – for his other words.
But when it came to Justin, though the deep purple haired male did indeed look away, it was to gather his thoughts and soothe his mind before reacting. When he felt able to look at the Unovan male all over again, he did so with a head tilt and with hands in his lap to prove his next words.
Not only this, but he was able to fixedly look right back at him. He really wasn't trying to win him over. Like Eli, Justin too was telling the truth.
"We don't… We don't have to do anything like that ever again if you've stopped feeling good about it." Justin said very matter-of-factly but not robotically at all. In actuality, he exhaled a bit of a breathy chuckle to prove how unimportant any of that was to him there and then. "I just want you to feel okay. That's all I'll ever want for you."
And with that, after showing off a brief closed mouth and slight dimple adorned smile all over again, Justin occupied himself with picking up his vinyl record once more and looking at it. And Eli was just left to absorb his words. It didn't take him long to do this at all.
For many months, Eli had known the younger male as a very unassuming and polite and laid back person in comparison to the way that he presented himself and gave utterly one thousand percent when he was on stage and had a guitar in his hand. Those fixed eyes of his had studied him quite a lot, to tell you the truth.
But I think there and then told him everything that he needed to know about Justin. Despite the fact that they were sneaking around and giddily exploring each other in a whole way that was new for them both when it came to each other, Justin still threw all of that off the table when one of them was feeling less than okay.
Eli wasn't stupid. Though he mixed up a good few times and got things wrong like anybody else, he could see for himself how excited Justin was to be doing that sort of thing with him. But still, he didn't want any of that there and then. He didn't want any of that ever again if Eli had reservations. And because of this, though the deep violet haired male was still unsure whether or not he actually wanted to talk about what had gone on, he certainly felt like a weight had been lifted off his shoulders.
It was like nothing was expected of him. It was like he was able to cry or talk or vent if he wanted to. It was like he was able to ignore it all completely and just talk about music. That was very refreshing to him.
So at least his body began to relax at all of these notions and his shoulders dropped from being so near to his ears. He didn't let out an audible sigh but he may as well have from the way that his chest moved. He shuffled a little on the bed. He shared an intentional but small smile with Justin when they looked in each other's directions all over again.
Then after Justin resumed studying his new purchase and gently running a soft finger over the ridges of the record in awe, Eli spoke once again. And the way that he spoke made it clear that these were more words slipping out.
"I might… I might feel good about another hug. I mean, that might make me feel good…" the deep violet haired male almost stammered and this caused Justin to look up straight away and smile straight away also. His nose threatened to scrunch up with fondness and especially so when Eli's head ducked over and his own fingers made their way to the shaved part of his head yet again.
But naturally, Justin complied without any more encouragement and after the deep purple haired male put the vinyl back in its sleeve and down on the floor for the time being, he shuffled all the more closer to Eli and then proceeded to wrap his arms around him.
In truth, he had a slight pause before he wrapped his arms around him to make sure that it was exactly what he wanted. But when Eli's hands moved to him first, Justin didn't hesitate to properly comply. The deep purple haired male gave the Unovan male the best embrace that he could muster up.
With his cheek resting on his shoulder lightly, not only did Justin's arms wrap tightly and supportively around the older male, they then moved to his shoulders and rubbed the front of them lightly before brushing down to his arms, soothing him through the material of his suit shirt.
Eli did exhale there and then but his eyes didn't flutter shut like they had threatened to do when they were in the living room. Instead, he enjoyed every single touch of the younger male and though they weren't talking about what was inwardly troubling him, he felt a great amount of relief the closer and closer that the two of them got.
And it was all initiated by the deep violet haired male. Justin just continued rubbing his fingers against Eli's body through the material of his clothes and then eventually moving the pads of his fingers to his neck, offering him comfort in that way.
It was after he did this and after Justin's cheek stopped lulling on one of the older male's shoulders that Eli took Justin's hand in his. The deep violet haired male paused but he paused for just a second before he pressed light kisses to the younger male's knuckles and then eventually where his ring usually laid too.
When the deep purple haired male naturally showed off a smile at this and his cheeks began to blush and it crept back towards his earlobes again too, Eli took this as a good sign and he finally leaned in to press a kiss to Justin's lips. It was an unusually short kiss for the two of them – and it was a peck – but I gather that it was one of the most instinctive and sweetest between them both.
Their smiles after their lips broke away from each other spoke only of this. And then Eli's lips spoke some more words, before Justin's could do the same and make sure that the deep violet haired male himself wasn't going too far.
"Maybe… Maybe I'll be okay with taking it under the covers." The deep violet haired male stated and the way that he said these words made it clear that he was addressing his own surprising actions of not sticking to his own words.
In return, Justin openly grinned and chuckled and scrunched up his face in amusement, wordlessly conveying things back to Eli without having to say them at all. But even so, after reaching his own hands to the side of the older male's face and leaving them there for just a second or two, the deep purple haired male of course complied.
However, he showed care and consideration when before he climbed under the covers to his own bed, he turned to the Unovan male.
"Are you sure that you're not going to get too hot?" the deep purple haired male asked innocently yet after Eli gave him a teasing and accusing glance, Justin was forced to clarify with another blush taking over his cheeks. He ran a hand through his shorter locks. "Only you would wear a full suit on a summer's evening."
The Unovan male's teasing eye narrow continued even after Justin made it clear what his words meant and proving that it was easy for them to carry on as normal when it was just the two of them, Eli's mock accusing glance turned into a mock alluring one.
As he stayed on the outside of the covers and on the end of the bed unlike the younger male who was settling himself in, his fingers reached for the first of his shirt buttons. And he asked before proceeding.
"Are you sure that you're not going to be the one getting too hot?" he questioned and he spoke in a bland and level tone but that time, it was for complete and utter effect. Justin wasn't playing around when an eye narrow took over his own face and his arms folded over his slim chest! And his remaining blush was an unintentional one but a very telling one.
The deep violet haired male ducked his own head but laughed and undid the rest of his buttons, flinging his crisp white shirt on the ground of Justin's bedroom floor when he no longer needed it. All he needed was to be up close with the younger male and in whatever way. He always felt really good when he was there.
Before you knew it, both of those males were tucked up in the same bed and even though the deep violet haired male wasn't facing the deep purple haired male, they were entwined with each other all the same. Justin had his skinny and short wearing legs wrapped around the suit covered ones of Eli and he had his chin resting on his shoulder, from behind.
The two of them weren't saying anything. The two of them weren't listening to Justin's new record either. They were just simply breathing. They were just simply being. And it was as the deep purple haired male's slim chest was pressed up against Eli's broader back that the older male stopped feeling content with just doing all of those things.
He stopped being content with just lying. He stopped being content with just breathing. He stopped being content with just being. He wanted to talk. At last, he wanted to talk. And somehow Justin knew this was soon as Eli's back grooved even further into him and his neck threatened to twist closer towards him.
Pressing a soft and simple kiss to the bare shoulder of the Unovan male, the eldest Morgan son wordlessly conveyed to him that he was ready to whatever he wanted. And because he wanted to open up, that happened. Eli's face scrunched up a little as he proceeded with doing so but the younger male was there for him the entire time, just breathing and just listening.
"Misty… Misty said a thing to me today. I don't know. It was stupid. I don't know why it made me feel not good." The Unovan male started and as Justin continued breathing, he let out one breath that spoke of fondness – but almost sad fondness. He didn't want him to think anything that he felt was stupid. Especially not as he was beginning to slowly feel so much for him. Justin pressed another kiss to his shoulder and then Eli continued. "She said… She wished how she had an uncle around when she was younger like how her kids have your dad. She said… That."
It was the deep violet haired male's turn to breathe there and then more noticeably and it wasn't really surprising. Though his face was turned back away from the younger male all over again, he could sense it scrunching up all over. He could sense the honestly and the hurt coursing through his veins as well as the vulnerability.
He didn't need to encourage him to say more because he did exactly this.
"I don't… I don't know why she said it. I don't know what she was expecting me to say or do. And I don't know why… It hit me the way that it did." The Unovan male concluded and Justin could feel his head beginning to slowly bow down and away from him.
At first, the deep purple haired male just listened. With concern and empathy on his face and in his throat as he took all of this in, Justin just thought to himself. But after Eli continued to bow away from him further and shut his eyes briefly to, the eldest Morgan son felt the need to pull him closer and squeeze him further too.
So he did this. And he eventually spoke himself.
"How did it make you feel…?" the deep purple haired male near enough whispered in the older male's ear at the different kind of closeness that they were sharing for the first time and neither of us know whether it was because of this at the outright question but it made the Unovan male respond promptly all over again.
His eyes flickered open and his head stopped resting with his chin very near to his chest. He answered for no other reason other than the fact that he was asked. But his response was entirely truthful and from the heart all the same.
"It made me feel… sad. And useless, to be honest. I mean… I know how it feels to feel unwanted. And the fact that I made her feel that way and at that young age makes me feel like crap... Even if I never intended for that to happen. Even if I was trying to do the opposite. I still made her feel that way…" Eli articulated himself and in spite of the fact that Justin was really listening to him and he was feeling his heart reaching out to him all the more at everything that was happening, the deep violet haired male suddenly squirmed away from him. But it wasn't out of the desire to be distant all over. In the middle of a moment of vulnerability, something had tickled him – literally and figuratively. He turned over his shoulder and spoke of the way that Justin's finger tips were making separate movements over his skin. "…Are you playing dot to dot on me?"
The deep purple haired male's face had quickly fallen at Eli seemingly moving away from him and then it grew confused at the accusation. But then when his eyes dropped down and he too took notice of what he was subconsciously to him, he understood more of what Eli was getting at.
Justin's eyes widened. Justin's eyes innocently widened. He shook his head towards himself but the Unovan male's next response was a truly fond and soft smile. It caused the deep purple haired male's face to scrunch up shyly.
"I'm sorry, I guess I was." The eldest Morgan son admitted and then a smile washed over his own face when Eli crept closer to him all over again, pushing his back up back towards him. Justin was able to resume touching with his fingertips each and every one of the freckles on Eli's back before drawing an invisible pattern around them as well. "I was listening though… So please continue."
Yet despite the fact that Justin had uttered these words and Eli was feeling very flattered and content by the touch that the younger male was offering him, he squirmed in his hold all over again.
However, the reason why soon became clear when the deep violet haired male rolled over to face Justin and then he lightly put a hand on his cheek.
"Let me have a go on you first though." Eli asked softly and with a boyish and sheepish yet endearing grin on his face and it goes without saying that after not much time at all – and after no hesitation – the two of them had flipped over and the Unovan male was reaching out his fingers to trace along all the marks that the younger male had on his back.
Eli had taken off Justin's own white t-shirt and flung it on the ground along with his crisp white suit one and he was dotting his fingers up the moles along the deep purple haired male's spine. He was feeling the younger male contentedly backing up closer to him when the Unovan male finally continued his words.
And not only had he spoken more words but he had uttered something very truthful and uncontrived and telling indeed.
"I just… I would never have wanted Misty or any of her sisters to feel unwanted in the way that I did. Because the truth is, I tried so hard to be there for her but I was never allowed to get that close to her… I don't know why." Eli continued speaking and the deep purple haired male believed that this was the conclusion. But there was still more to come. There was still more to come as the Unovan male's fingers drew a similar patter along Justin's shoulder blades. "I would never have wanted her to miss out on anything… She already missed out a lot of her mom… And her dad too…"
And because the deep violet haired male's tone of voice got even lower and levelled out all over again – and because of the fact that his fingertips began to stop stroking along Justin's skin like it had been doing before – the deep purple haired male knew a part of their moment together was then over.
And the part of their moment together that was then over was the eldest Morgan son not saying much at all apart from listening. As he did indeed listen, something flashed over his mind. Something coursed through his own veins. Something hitched in his throat. It was words. So he knew that he had to say them.
He really didn't want to come on too strong. But Eli often said to him that he wanted him to be himself – that's all he ever wanted him to be. Just like Justin only wanted Eli to feel okay.
Though he really was enjoying the feel of the older male's fingertips along his spine when it resumed all over again, the deep purple haired male rolled over again and it was his turn to face the older male. Eli furrowed his brow a bit but instead chose to occupy his fingers with tracing the delicate moles that were on his face also.
And in between the Unovan male's touch, Justin told him very simply but very supportively also.
"I… I know that you would have been a brilliant uncle if you had been there way back. But you're a brilliant uncle now. And that's the circumstance that's being presented to you. That's what you're going to get the most out of now, rather than looking too much into the past. That's what you need to try and focus on." The deep purple haired male told the older male and part of him worried that this was going to come across as generic advice.
But the way that Eli's eyes locked onto his and they widened and they listened, made it clear to him that he got some of his point across.
So because of this, the deep purple haired male was able to allow his shoulders to relax all over again As a matter of fact, he turned back around all over again and pressed up against Eli before. But as the Unovan male's fingers made their way to his spine yet again – that time out of gratitude and the feelings of closeness as well as other things – it was Justin's turn to close his eyes. And it was Justin's turn to add.
"After all… I kind of know what I'm talking about because if I focused on my past and living my life according to that past then I wouldn't be here right now with you…"
And the reason that Justin uttered these words were for no reason other than the fact that he thought them. So he said them. And after he spoke them aloud, he allowed his eyes to remain closed and pressed his cheek against the front of Eli's shoulder, his breathing evening out even more.
He wasn't expecting to get an answer out of Eli. He wasn't expecting to get an answer out of Eli at all. But after a couple of minutes rather than a couple of seconds, one more thing slipped out from between the deep violet haired male's lips. It was indeed a response. And it was one that floated out of his mouth and humbly received by Justin's ears.
"Well…" Eli began and the eldest Morgan son tried to make sure his ears were the thing that pricked up rather than his heart. He waited for more which he assumed would come. Soon enough, it did. "Thank god for that…" was all the Unovan male said and it was uttered in between an exhale so there was a slight chance that it could have been missed by the younger male.
But thankfully it wasn't.
And needless to say, the deep purple haired male's breathing evened out all the more so with contentment and he floated off into a dreamland, the dulcet tones of Eli's voice and those words being the last thing that he remembered before he eventually headed off to dreamland.
And as for the deep violet haired male – well, he stayed awake. Justin's new vinyl disc record had never been put on so he didn't have that to watch soothingly spinning around as he thought to himself. He didn't have any music to ponder to either.
All he had was the sound of Justin's light breathing and the feel of his skin brushing up against his as he inhaled and he exhaled. And that was something that the deep violet haired male never would have believed to have happened.
He had kept the truth of his sexuality hidden and a secret for a very long time and while he felt that one day he would have an opportunity to explore it fully and come to a concrete answer – he never would have believed that person would be like Justin. He never would have believed that person would be Justin.
But he couldn't possibly feel gladder about that whole thing. He never would have traded the feeling of him right up close against him and the sensation of his heart – his brave and flamboyant and exuberant and courageous heart – beating right against his for anything in the world.
But that would be another thing he kept to himself for a good long while! As well as why he couldn't be the uncle that he so longed to be. But more on that another time.
The End.
There you go! Thanks so much for reading and I hope you enjoyed :3 It's easy to gather certain things about Justin and Eli and their romantic relationship. Together they are incredibly intense. Volatile at times. And very passionate and longing to be able to be up close with one and other and express those desires (!). However, you can tell here that there is a true intimacy beneath the surface. If it was apparent in the first occasion of "hooking up", then it was going to certainly happen and evolve the second year, when they lived with one and other and fell in love. In spite of their tumultuous break up, there really was a trust and a tenderness at one point. And speaking of break ups, I really need to write why Justin's usual boyfriend, Sammy, keeps breaking up with him - and causing him to be with Eli, and then Katie, in between! :P But that's for the future. Thanks again for reading and I will be back again next Wednesday with another update so see you then!
AmyBieberKetchum signing out :)