Hello, it is Wednesday and I am back with a new chapter! I can't believe that it's already been eight months since I wrote this. I remember having so much fun with it and it's had quite a lot of editing over that time but it's finally here! Today we tackle something rather involved. It's no secret that James has a girlfriend in Lynne as well as remaining a husband to Jessie and, in spite of the challenges that the polyamory presents, everyone is as amicable as they can be. It's quite impressive really! However, it didn't always start off that way. James once believed he was destined for monogamy. In this chapter, we see Jessie and Lynne navigate the tension that comes with facing the truth of where James' path truly lies. And, in the second half, well - Lynne has to face her worries that Jessie pointed out all those years ago. I hope you enjoy! :D
Not all tension can be cut by a knife. Sometimes, you don't even know you are about to walk into a war zone simmering gently beneath the surface. Sometimes, tension can be like a thick fog on an already cloudy day, creeping up on you so gradually that you don't even notice it until you try to put one hand in front of your face.
Or in this case, ignorance is your only companion until you walk into a room.
It was like that for Lynne on one very particular day. When it became apparent, she could not even begin to think of turning a blind eye. And, funnily enough, she was not even the one walking into the room.
The moment that Lynne was no longer alone with just her musings and her sewing, she felt it as if that sewing needle of hers and the thread as well had formed a terrible union and decided to choke her, right around the neck. Jessie allowed herself into the kitchen and Lynne immediately stood, not bothering to even fear the needle freeing itself from her hold and falling to where her bare feet were under the island countertop in the kitchen.
Despite how real it felt only seconds before, Lynne clearly was not choked – by an invisible pair coming together or otherwise. She found her voice almost as quickly as she discovered her actions.
A hand of hers rested promptly over her shuddering chest.
"O-Oh, I'll get out of your way." She began, for half a second frozen in her countenance of standing in front of her bar stool chair and hand over her chest before she twitched, her knees buckling. Lynne nearly curtsied instead of offering other words she did not know if she should say. "I don't need to be here."
She forced herself to flash a smile, cheeks giving the pale red of her lipstick a run for its money as she began to try to not only remove herself from where she was standing but to discard her activity completely.
This might end badly for me, she didn't even have the time to muse to herself, as the needle had truly come away from the thread at that point and silently clattered its way down to the wooden floor.
Nevertheless, that detail was merely a trifle. And Lynne had a feeling that the worded response from the other woman was surely going to puncture her far more.
"Don't be silly." Jessie tried not to bark but she did. In truth, she was just as startled to find Lynne in her kitchen although that probably should not have been the case. Silence ringing in the air for a good few minutes and her laptop inside its bulky bag lingering underneath her arm, she at last decided to change her tune as much as she could. "Don't leave on my account. I don't think I'll be here long."
Lynne with her hand sliding down from her chest towards her hip and her left one making its way to her left hip without the added detour tried to tell herself that she wasn't the reason that Jessie wouldn't be sticking around.
But how could she convince herself of that, really?
All the same, like Jessie had found the strength inside of herself to change her manner as much as she could, Lynne encouraged herself to nod and keep her smile of that of a painted doll's face. However, she could not unclench enough to sit back down in her seat and furthermore, she had even less nerve to crouch down and start tracing her fingers along the wood floor of her kitchen, searching for the lost needle.
Jessie probably thought she had made herself far too comfortable with her belongings recently, Lynne berated herself.
"If you're sure." Lynne found her voice and still standing barely half a foot in front of the bar stool, removed her hands from cupping around her narrow hips and joined together over her stomach simply for something to do.
She might have been okay with portraying a gesture for the sake of it, but she could not force words if they did not wish to come.
Apparently, it was the same for Jessie. Another thing they had in common.
The woman with hair the color of a deeply blushing rose let out a grunt that was the word mm and then she inadvertently made some strides to break the distance towards Lynne, slapping her contained laptop bag on the countertop with far more vigor than even she intended.
Lynne attempted to conceal her flinch but failed. Well, at least it had given her such a fright that she had taken her seat all over again.
Embellishing the nervous chuckles that omitted from Lynne's throat, Jessie had words like barbed wire that scratched across her mind, and she could not stop herself from saying them.
Lynne could not force herself to say words that were deemed untrue. Jessie could not swallow back sentences she longed to say.
"I'm sure. I have a meeting to head off too soon enough. I was just touching up an email in the meantime." Jessie's words breezed into the atmosphere and Lynne, looking down at her lap, managed a half nod. But sensing that the other woman was a jungle feline and although she had allowed her preyed self a head start for the time being, she felt that it wouldn't be too long until she was breakfast. "Besides." Jessie announced that word and Lynne was getting an even closer idea of what was to come. "You've never been shy about hanging around here. So why would you be now?"
Thank goodness I was not present for this occasion and can only feel the burn in hindsight!
How fortunate Lynne was when she had chosen to look down at her own lap. However, something inside of her that she did not know what made her deem it necessary to try as much as she could to look back over at Jessie after she heard these words, her right eye squinting ever so slightly and that same eye presenting itself like dew on a steamed window on a particularly early morning.
Jessie might as well have been the one wearing the red lipstick. She seemed to possess no qualms looking at Lynne during the entirety of her words and that did not stop when she looked wearily back at her, underneath the countertops and hidden to her, her nails digging so hard into the hem of her skirt that it was a blur where human being ended, and material began.
Jessie only decided to look down at the black stretch of marble that separated them both when Lynne managed to coax sounds of her own from somewhere. She did not know where.
"Oh dear." She said, her gaze flickering to her skirt that would surely be dented in some way if she continued her grip and the woman across from her. Her oceanic orbs, like the wonder that they resembled, didn't dry up and her red lips grew as wobbly and thin as a rickety pier hanging above said ocean.
Something inside of Jessie altered. It wasn't immediate. In fact, it wasn't until she made more noise without using her vocal cords and unzipped her laptop from the bag and she was concealed from Lynne's sight by the laptop open in front of her.
It wasn't until they had that new bit of distance that was added between them that she didn't exactly have a change of heart – and maybe something inside of her didn't change at all. Her exterior tried a different approach, though.
Yet from the second that Lynne heard a noise coming from her mouth, she braced herself.
"I have work to be getting on with and I'm sure you do as well." Jessie tried again and while the expression on her face could have been a plethora of displays as she remained behind her laptop, Lynne still knew that there would be more to come. "Ignore me."
And with that, the sound of words stopped, and the tapping of laptop keys ensued. Evidently, she was serious about cracking on even if she hadn't been about the sentences that she had decided to wound the other woman with earlier on.
Ignore me, even Lynne had to silently scoff to herself as these words echoed around her dreamy mind. That was a mean feat at the best of times and certainly on that occasion!
Being encouraged to ignore after that sort of display had presented itself was next to impossible. It was like a thunderstorm screaming out, ignore me, ignore me, nothing to see here! That kind of thing urged onlookers. And Jessie's behavior desired responses. Whether or not she even wanted to be perceived at all.
No one could deny that her decisions on that day made it seem like she was up for a scrap.
One of the few things that she was fortunate about during that season of her life was that Lynne wasn't looking to get into any sort of scuffle, least of all with her. So, even if a small part of her wondered what it would have been like if she reached across the table and lightly swiped Jessie's laptop lid down, instead she simply nodded for her not to see.
And Lynne complied, ignoring her as best as she could, forgetting about her presence and the words that had been exchanged up until that point. And indeed, the elephant in the room which had entangled them both.
Ignore me, those words continued to ricochet through the chambers of her mind as if it were cave walls that could not forget the outward musings of a tourist. And they were probably going to be in the forefront of her mind all while she tried to see that through and, like Jessie, continue with what she felt that she needed to do.
Even after momentarily dropping to her knees, however, and locating the needle on the floor without too much time grazing her hand along the wood, the activity that she had found herself so absorbed in for the full hour before became a whole lot less desirable.
And that wasn't even including the fact that Jessie may be encouraged into her office after reading something or other on her screen and discovering the fact that she had, once again, rummaged through her and her husband's company fabrics in order to make herself a new little dress for visiting Misty in the hospital.
This was something that Lynne found easier to push from her mind!
But, like how it is when the sensation of warmth radiating from the pits of your stomach is far more elusive to get hold of once you set your mind on that idea, the more that Lynne attempted to comply with what Jessie wanted, the less she felt comfortable doing so.
Even more so, like a child left hungry and wondering when they are shut in a room for a time out when all they long for is explanation and connection, Lynne felt the need to talk with Jessie even if she was advised not to.
It was not like they had ever even been great conversationalists before. But their exchanges had always been pleasant. Interesting. Sometimes even solidifying.
It could go back to that. Couldn't it?
Couldn't it…?
Lynne suddenly felt a very real need to try and prove to herself that things still could be the way they once had been.
Not that the activity had been all that interesting to her in the past couple of moments, after only just being picked up and threaded, the needle and thread was placed back down on the countertop all over again.
In the middle of embellishing her email, Jessie began to see Lynne's head hovering above the rim of her screen.
"Are your kids up to anything exciting?" Lynne wondered, that face of a doll taking over her features once more even if her cheeks were inwardly thumping for a different reason. Her palms were flat on the counter and her arms straight as she poised herself. "I hear sweet Jayden has been doing a series of paintings for my daughter. And Jazzy…"
Suddenly, Lynne's words left her, and they would not reveal themselves again. They didn't dare from the way that, while Jessie didn't take her chance to slam her laptop lid down before Lynne could gently encourage it to shut, both her eyebrows rose, and her hawk-like eyes too appeared above the line of her laptop screen.
That look and that look alone was enough to render Lynne speechless.
Jessie didn't need to find her own words. She could have easily gone back to leading by example and ignoring the other woman in return and continuing to type on her laptop. But who wants a straightforward way with things, eh?
Her cornflower blue eyes revolved in her sockets so severely that she might as well have raised her voice. It was certainly the case from the way that Lynne had a déjà vu, wondering if her needle and thread really had formed a maniacal duo this time and not only wrapped around her throat but sewn her lips shut too.
At least her ears were in perfect working order. Well, it probably wasn't great from where she was sitting, almost sliding off the bar stool with sweat!
"You really don't have to do this, you know." Jessie said, and Lynne's bare feet were firmly planted on the wooden floor beneath them both, but they still nearly gave way from wondering if this was another encouragement or it was a threat. She was not reassured when she started to see the magenta haired woman more crystal clearly. "Just don't." That certainly sounded like a warning, her hand still poised on the half open lid of her laptop after she had pushed it down somewhat. "You don't need to try so hard to converse with me."
There it was again. There that sentiment was all over again.
Jessie told Lynne that she didn't need to worry but these words made her stomach feel so unwell that she wondered if she needed to phone up the hospital and have herself administered right alongside her daughter.
She tried not to move all that much because she knew that her bare thighs underneath the long length of her skirt were sticking to the bar stool beneath her and would make a horrendous, unwelcome noise if she was to shuffle. But now she was back in her seat, she was painfully aware that she could feel herself sliding down, down, and down some more.
A breathy sigh escaping from her rapidly paling lips that she could not stop, Lynne considered what she needed to say before she found the words.
No, what she longed to say.
God, what she longed to say was so many things, but she had been told not to bother, hadn't she? And not only once. But twice.
She was being encouraged not to worry. Not to find words if she did not deem them necessary. But at that point, she wondered if every word under the sun could be deemed necessary between them both. There had to be something. There had to be anything.
Lynne did not know how they were going to live in such proximity with each other, and with their eyes searching for the same person if they were not allowed to talk.
"So… You and I are just not going to talk? We're not going to address any of it…?" Lynne said these words and as they were coming out of her, she could not believe that they were forming on her tongue. Other things formed as well. Unlike other people, she felt no embarrassment about her cheeks burning and her eyes blurring. "I think out of all the people that might have things to say, you and I probably have the most to say to each other." A noise almost a distant relation of a laugh occurred. "And should say to each other."
Jessie really did slam her laptop lid down this time. The email was never going to get edited, was it?
Unlike the other woman, her throat didn't make the noise like that of a nervous chuckle and instead just came out with words barely a second after her had swung from side to her, the corner of her mouth threatened to twitch upwards in mirth and both her palms ran over her forehead and over the slick of her tight ponytail.
"And why is that, exactly?" Jessie questioned. Her tone of voice couldn't have been further from an educator gently encouraging a student into broadening their thinking. There and then she was a vengeful professor, believing that whatever she was going to hear was going to give her the last laugh.
Lynne's eyes threatened to prick at the absurdity of it all but this time, for once, she blinked this outcome back and her irises shifted from side to side, inadvertently breezing her own touch across her own forehead.
She could not ignore how clammy her scalp felt to the touch.
"Because…" she found herself mirroring much of Jessie's personality by being quick with words, but she showed that she was still herself by trailing off afterwards.
She knew what the right thing to say was. She knew what she wished to say. Or rather, the truth was like blinding neon lights flashing inside of her mind. But she did not have the slightest clue how to begin saying them to Jessie without wanting to defy expectations and become either the needle or the thread herself and topple down onto the cool solidness of the grey wooden floor.
Jessie was a lot less hesitant. Her lips pressed together before she spoke, and her lips presented a natural cherry hue.
"Because?" she intended to encourage. To Lynne, it was a ridicule. "Because you and I are…" Jessie's lips paused, and they parted wordlessly after being so very sure of herself. She had to take a deep inhale before she found her nerve all over again and along with engulfing oxygen, she decided to be demure with her wording. She wasn't usually the type to sugar coat. "Connected to the same man?"
At least one of them had been brave enough to say it. To compliment the fruity hue of Jessie's lips, Lynne's cheeks were stinging all over again and no looking left or right could encourage her eyes to portray a drought.
She wanted to laugh. Oh, how did she want to laugh at the turn that her day had taken in which she couldn't believe. No matter how much in her school years she had been deemed one of the silent ones to watch, she had never been the type to go up against one of the most self-assured and popular in the vicinity.
Why did she feel like she was doing that now? And why did she feel like she had done something bad? Maybe she had.
But she had believed that James was not only open for the taking, but permission had been granted a long time ago.
"Well, yes." Lynne could not believe it when these words tumbled out of her and then her porcelain hand was back on that scorching forehead of hers all over again. She believed that she needed to hurry and say more things. But still, she wasn't going to falsify anything. "I just thought… We would at least say something. Anything."
She didn't have the time to give examples of what. She didn't have the time to outwardly mourn what she was expecting or admit what she was fearing.
Speaking her mind had been Jessie's gift since birth and she was not about to change who she was.
"Well, I don't think there's a need for you and me to say anything. It's not like it's going to bring us closer." At long last that sound came. It was like the salvation of rain at the end of a very long and hot summer. Although, when Jessie's half-breathy, derisive cackle presented itself, Lynne could not sink into her chair and relax. She clenched as it dawned on her that things would never go back to how they had been. And she hadn't even had the chance to say – or even realize – that what once was had meant a lot to her. "My husband and I are doing enough talking as I'm sure you are with yours. No need to run words dry for the sake of it."
This wasn't making Lynne feel any better and Jessie could see that, but she also didn't change a single thing. She at last decided to shuffle her bottom for something to do while she found more of her own words and was caught off guard when silence ensued.
Perhaps she would go on to cry so many tears when she was already partially a desert and even her sweat had dried up in the middle of conversation.
Lynne tried to show her spine erecting against an invisible back to her seat and she encouraged a hand against the sadly thumping heart of hers to portray sincerity. But in truth, her shoulders had never wanted to bury down close to her hips more in her life.
"You speak of me to James…?" She didn't know why she felt the need to ask this but at least she knew why it made her cheeks throb to finally say aloud a name. She was not clueless to the fact that when it was sent between them both, Jessie could not speak. She nodded though. "I am sorry."
Her hand clutched furthermore at the word am like her chest was a precious necklace and the elastic was about to ping, sending flimsy beads across every direction of Jessie and James' kitchen. She so longed to come across well. And amid that desire, how under the spotlight and unnerved she felt that the magic that she had stumbled into once or twice in the past week was being discussed.
Of course, she had to realize that it was because, after all, like Jessie pointed out to her, she was having conversations of her own with her dear Jordan. But the thought of James speaking of the wonder they had discovered only momentarily with each other? The idea of someone knowing even sparse details? And most of all, his wife?
Oh, she had to know that this would be the case.
But truthfully, it was frightening enough to fall for James, and for it to dawn on her that every kiss he planted to her body had revived her in ways that she hadn't realized she had been deceased. And now it seemed so very real – so very open and frightening – that someone else guessed even a sliver.
Jessie pulled words out from her own gut and Lynne needed to confront them as well as each and every thing that was becoming apparent to her.
"I don't want your apology." She stated and this made Lynne quiver like a bee had landed on her forearm and injected her with its sting. But then, something else poisoned her. Pain, as Jessie's countenance changed, and it was something she was not expecting. Her elbows rested on either side of her forgotten laptop, and both her palms ran over her unraveling hair. "My conversations with my husband about you are not a new thing." For once, Lynne could not fret upon hearing this. Her kneecaps were trembling seeing Jessie, not in the way that she always used to. "I knew very well that if you found yourselves alone with each other then you would find each other in that way."
Jessie brushed the palm of her hand from the bridge of her nose and up to her scalp, not caring that she would need to touch her foundation up before she headed back to work and hoping that this gesture would conceal the idea of tears even though they did not dare even prick for a single second.
Lynne roughly swallowed.
How painful it is to suspect and not be able to stop. How much of a gift and a curse it is to love someone so deeply even in separation that you can predict their next move. Maybe it was just that predictable. Or maybe it was something that had threatened to creep up on Jessie for years.
Like how a lover discovers a scar that you somehow sensed had been there all along but hadn't really been able to tell because it was right between your shoulder blades.
Jessie had known what was coming. Had always known. But she could never have predicted how she would feel when it was finally time to square up to fate.
"If that is true then I stand by my point that we really do have things to discuss." Lynne whispered even though she tried to speak as plainly as Jessie had been speaking to her. Why did she have to be the one to verbally crack? Her head shook this thought away as well as the hundreds of thousands of other ones. She needed to look down at her lap to speak her own truth. "I don't think I could bare not talking at least one thing through. At this point, I'd even welcome your anger. I…" Lynne trailed off. But funnily enough, the words came to her when she went against her better judgement and decided to fill her vision with Jessie some more. "I just am sorry…"
And with that, her words limply fell to her lap.
Even Lynne can't put her finger on what exactly she was sorry for, she tells me in hindsight. Too many things to pin it down to just one.
Sorry that Jessie knew and loved James so well but still had to put their relationship on the back burner. Sorry that she had seen something coming long before even she had a tangible idea. Sorry that Jessie was so wonderful. A brilliant wife. Mother. And deserved to figure out her relationship for what it was without the added dilemma of the sacred spot in Lynne's heart reserved for her husband and her husband alone.
She probably could have done this great many times before but, at long last, there, and then was the moment in which Jessie flinched for the first time. Or perhaps she shivered. Either way, she concealed it by loosely cupping her hand underneath her chin and waving her other hand haphazardly.
Nothing about that time in their lives should be dismissed.
But Jessie didn't like to linger in feelings for too long. Anger. Jealousy. Resentment. Certainly not regret. That was the worst one. Perhaps only topped by vulnerability.
She waved her hands and with the breeze, she found her words. And at first, they nearly brought actual waves to Lynne's wide, oceanic eyes.
"I need to be angry even less than I need you to be sorry." Jessie started, and Lynne blinked, but not to conceal any of her own emotion. She really felt that she needed to be on her knees, begging for forgiveness and at the end of Jessie's wrath, for which she was known. "I need…"
Lynne heard the crack in her voice as her touch still lingered about her chin and she saw even more so the flush that burned onto her cheeks in the split second afterwards. Jessie for half a breath thought about disguising her lapse in countenance with anger even if she expressed that it wasn't necessary.
God, anything was better than not only losing her words but her nerve.
Risking going on to regret it, Lynne couldn't stop both hands of hers falling over her slowly rising and falling chest and then her hands stretched out across the marble distance between them both. She did not dare reach out to Jessie and touch her. But she did this. And it was her turn to encourage with no ulterior motive.
"What is it you need…?" she asked. Upon future reflection, I find it interesting how she did not include the words from me.
Lynne was already painfully aware that she was part of the reason that Jessie's heart had shattered, even if she acted like it was so expected that she had already had the idea to wrap it in cellophane. So, she knew that there was probably nothing that she of all people could do to even listen, let alone make things better.
But she had to try, didn't she? She had to try. To prove to herself as much as anybody else that she meant no harm. She just for once had allowed her heart to go where it felt so natural to go.
Rarely, Jessie really thought about the words she was going to pluck from inside of her before she announced them. The fact that her shoulders lifted upwards towards her ears before drooping down near where her elbows were still planted on either side of her laptop proved this.
But once she had found them, she revealed them. And again, she had no qualms about sending hues of cornflower blue in an even match against shades of the ocean.
"I need… to tell you the truth. I need you to know the truth." Jessie started and because this was the last thing that Lynne expected, slowly but surely, her arms began to relinquish and draw closer to her body. The other woman's lower lip tucked inside the rest of her mouth and then it was set free along with more words. "You deserve to know it. But I don't think you're going to like it."
Jessie bit her lip again. Lynne did not.
She copied her usual persona and found her voice promptly.
"Tell me." Lynne insisted. Although it was like describing a flower as insisting something. Any second, it could be blown away by the gentlest of breezes.
Jessie exhaled in such a way that was not a soft gust of wind! And in the quickness that she found more words, she showed that, despite her prior attitude, she was going to get round to discussing certain things with Lynne eventually.
"You might think that what has happened between you and my husband is magical. Once in a lifetime." she commenced. Lynne's right eye threatened to twitch but she could not stop her heart from missing a beat at the idea that, maybe James too had labelled their union as such and that was why Jessie was saying these words. "But this has happened with him before." Jessie's gaze had the potential to cut as much as her words. "And it's not going to stop here."
Lynne became the embodiment of that breeze there and then rather than the flower that could be disintegrated in one fell swoop. She exhaled such an exhale that she could have easily given Jessie a run for her money. Hotness bubbled right from the deep pit of her stomach, up to her chest and throat and it felt like steam was escaping the crown of her head.
She wished to laugh. She wished to cry. She wished for both. She wanted to defend herself. Defend James. Protect all that they had discovered within each other because how on earth could that be replicated?
But Lynne had just enough control to think with a small sliver of her mind as well as her heart and it dawned on her that she should at least hear Jessie out. At least consider. She looked back at her. A gaze met a gaze.
But in the end, it was futile. This was a warning that was not going to be heeded.
"Don't you think that is coming from a place of hate…?" pondered Lynne, choosing her wording carefully with droplets threatening to bubble in her eyes even though the way she said it was still a risk. Jessie didn't need to counter with the word no. Her head swung from side to side. The tears bubbled In Lynne's throat, not just her eyes. Her cheeks were crimson. "It was special."
A mighty risk to take! In the end, it was only a risk because of the way that Jessie's pupil glinted like a diamond, even if she didn't allow the corner of her mouth to tug upwards. Lynne was not a fool. Her collarbones and her neck flushed as well as her cheeks as she knew perfectly well what this meant.
She didn't need Jessie to spell it out for her. But still, she did, already preparing for the end by lifting her laptop lid halfway back up.
"It's coming from a place of perspective." Jessie backed up her claims. Lynne still wasn't really having any of it. She never wanted to have any of it. She wished she could pick up her needle and thread for something to do but she knew she would be back to square one, wounded by the prick of the head as well as the interaction. "Just consider that I might know James better than you. Or at least, differently."
Lynne sniffed. There were no tears in her nostrils to snort back. She hoped it would make her seem sturdy – derisive – even if that ran even more risks. She did not wish to cross Jessie in the slightest. Even less than she meant to get between her and her husband.
But Jessie was bad mouthing him, wasn't she?
If anyone had a right to defend him, it was her.
Right…?
"I know James too." She said, her tone barely above a whisper, not out of uncertainty of her words but just how much she couldn't believe that she was being doubted. Their love was being doubted. Granted, perhaps a wife had ever right to! But the earth practically had shifted when she had been taken to places that she had never been taken before. "I see him for who he truly is as well. And I would never say anything that disrespected you or my own husband." Jessie's single eyebrow quirking upwards was telling. "But you don't search for more after what we have shared."
Jessie at long last allowed herself to fully smirk. She scowled at just how naïve Lynne was being. Her husband may not be unfaithful. But come on. They were nearly treading roads that had been trodden before. Perhaps Lynne should have spent her time looking down from up there at more than with just a gaze filled with wonderment.
Maybe then she would see that Jessie was speaking from a place of sympathy – even prevention. Certainly not hate.
Lynne wanted to turn around and to leave when she came face to face with seeing Jessie looking like a sly predator in her presence for the first time ever. Yet she managed to stick it out.
"I hope with all of my heart that you are right." Jessie said and, although she didn't label her own words and her own attitude at all, Lynne certainly did, and she felt she could not kid herself that they were in the slightest bit filled with sincerity.
How bitter it tasted to have longed to talk but now they were, to realize that Jessie might have been right after all. That they had nothing to talk about.
She was right about this. But surely, that didn't have to mean she was right about the other thing, did it?
Lynne's flushing neck chuckled gingerly and with tears finally plucking at the insides of her throat, she sent her own sentiment back.
"For you?" she asked, trying to be coy. But the truth is, maybe because Jessie didn't crow about it, she had honed her observational skills almost as acutely as anybody else – as Lynne – and she could sense the hint of desperation clinging to every fiber of the interior of the other woman.
She, however, did not offer reassurance. Consolation would get her nowhere. She needed to know the truth. She didn't exactly need to be warned. But she couldn't be naïve. Sure, the love felt magical. But that didn't mean that it was for everybody else. And it didn't mean that reality did not surround them all like a looming bubble.
Life was still life. James was still James. And some lessons repeated until the cycle was broken.
So, Jessie insisted. The truth came. And she was right, Lynne wouldn't want to hear it.
"For you." Her fingers were no longer cupping any part of her, and her elbows were then poised above her laptop keys, digits too. She knew her words were going to bring her a kitchen empty except for herself. "It would be a lie to say I made my peace with this a long time ago. But I saw it coming then. And I see it now. Love reveals everything." Lynne's bottom twitched in her seat. "If you and James love each other like you say you do, then you will wake up to the truth of his nature too."
And with that, Lynne wished to hear no more. She had felt so ready for the truth. And she believed that she still was. What she was hearing was not the truth. She knew what kind of game Jessie was playing. She noticed how many times she called him my husband rather than James. There must have been a part of her that wanted to tear that man away from Lynne. Yes, there just had to be. And that's where this came from.
Lynne had the face of a doll again as she rose from the chair, deciding to fully curtsy this time out of conclusion as well as bitter politeness before leaving the kitchen like she knew in her bosom that she should have done from the minute that Jessie made her appearance.
Jessie's fingers hovered above the keys for some time. But then her shoulders shrugged. Unwanted air blew from her nostrils. And she continued what she needed to do before came her time to leave the kitchen as well.
Her own words echoed around her mind, knowing they were the truth and the truth as she saw it. Lynne, on the other hand, allowed them to ricochet through the chambers of her mind just once or twice then, with hands clasping over her chest and her nose pointing towards the sky, which was once her home, pushed it to the back of her mind.
She didn't need to be right. She didn't need Jessie to be wrong. It was all forgotten about. It was neutral.
But here is the thing, you see. Something pushed to the quietest corners of the mind never goes away. They need to be acknowledged, dealt with, and then you are free. Something shoved away will always come back.
Lynne didn't heed Jessie's warning then and she made a point not to ever again, not even when her and James became life partners and both those two women shared a bed, a home and even children with that same man.
So why oh why did they have to smother her on one very ordinary day? It started so perfectly normally. But ended like not only had that needle and thread come back to haunt her, but they had worked together with some other items to form a cushion and it was that that was smothering her to the point of no return.
Let's get to that half of this story.
James' attention turned immediately from sitting at that same kitchen island top a decade later when the door swung open and two people bustled in. The presence caused his mouth to widen in the instance that he took note of one of the people making their way through the door. But then, seeing them together and one of them partially hobbling, leaning up against the other for support, the smile stopped being free of anything else and was joined by two eyebrows moving closer together and lines appearing underneath his hairline.
Removing glasses away from his eyes and pencils discarding everywhere in his wake as he stood up, James made his way over to greet the fallen soldier and apparent princess.
"Oh, such a surprise to see you both together." He could not help but comment as he broke the distance but then he focused more on the task at hand. Now James was no longer bespectacled, the milky appearance of his green eyes was far more apparent. Yes, that was why. "What on earth happened to you? That looks bad."
Lynne glanced over at Jorginho for half a heartbeat before figuring that her good deed was soon to be over, and she would no longer need to help him stand upright in the next couple of seconds. James was on the same page as her.
After he took in the state of his good friend, he didn't hesitate to encourage him, so he was leaning into him instead, observing him from the tip of his scuffed boots to the top of his tendrils appearing like he had been caught in a bit of a rainstorm even though the weather was perfectly bright.
Jorginho, however, smiled in spite of his appearance but even he couldn't hold back the wince that naturally took over him when, as his mouth moved towards its classically wide state, this encouraged more of the blood to come lose from his nostrils and trickle down towards his chin.
"Oh, it's not too rough." He responded, not bothering to speak of words along the lines of you should see the other guy and this told James that there was probably a good story in it and a very good reason Jorginho was rocking up to his household in the way that he was.
Continually trying to smile more through it all rather than flinch at the sensation of blood trickling down into the patch of beard directly beneath his mouth, his next actions made both Lynne and James wonder if he was still suffering despite his good attitude towards it.
His left hand and the one that had not reached to squeeze around James' shoulder as he was supported suddenly went weak and it caused the helmet of his that he had been carrying to almost clatter down against the wooden floor.
Fortunately, James managed to take it from him before a terrible noise clanged throughout the house while still holding Jorginho steady, even beating Lynne to it and rendering her just standing there.
"It does look a little rough." James disagreed, having to pull his friend in his armor closer to his body and encourage him to hold onto him fully so he could momentarily hold his bounty collecting helmet in both hands before letting it sit on the countertop for an assumedly well-earned respite.
Well, it probably hadn't even been worn on that day judging by the state of Jorginho's face!
Lynne's eyes wandered and noticed how the helmet would have blended into James' kitchen island top if it were not for the sunset hued streaks etching around the equally midnight visor. But then, she felt her partner's gaze managing to look away from Jorginho long enough to take her in as well, his eyebrows tugging back closer together again and those lines penciling across his forehead too.
She explained, her hands joining together over her stomach for something to do now she didn't have a sturdy man to lead across a driveway.
"I found him making his way up the road as I was coming home." She told James, her gaze flickering between both him and Jorginho, her pupils not needing to move all that much because of their proximity. The pattern of her skirt felt a smooth, cooling hand washing over it. "I recognized the silhouette straight away."
She waved an airy hand in front of them all and a girly, nervous giggle escaped from her lips. In hindsight, she didn't know why. She needn't have worried. James was a tad too occupied to overthink it from holding up the broad man who was made all the bulkier thanks to his Team Rocket armor.
"Certainly." He agreed, leaving it open to which part of Lynne's words he agreed to. His reassuring hold on Jorginho left him long enough to reach into his pocket for his own handkerchief, beginning to do the first, small part of the clean up operation as, although his strong nose had stopped wrinkling and oozing blood, he could tell just how bothersome it was for him. "We'll get you properly sorted out, no doubt about that." Jorginho's mouth gratefully stretched wide behind the white patterned hanky that was portraying even redder roses as time went on. "Disagreement?"
Jorginho newly discovered the cramping sensation that was pulling at his neck when he tried to shake his head and realized that he couldn't.
"Of sorts." Came his answer, waiting until James had removed most of the wet blood from clinging to the skin underneath his nostrils and making a path towards his beard and was looking at him with his head on one side to elaborate the full story. "I was strolling home past the fire station when I saw a massive Blastoise disciplining their little one in ways that I disagreed with."
James didn't glance at how Lynne took to this news but immediately he couldn't help but smile, the curve of his neck straightening and his eyes glittering in ways that were not just merely fondness. For half a second, his hand cupped under the chin, rendering him able to feel the dips of Jorginho's dimples if he were to smile.
"Aw, so you decided to stand up for the little thing?" he asked, already picturing it so very clearly as if he had been there. He had certainly been told a lot of tales of Jorginho standing up for those a lot smaller than him and been around to witness them even more.
He was left with his own neck twinging when Jorginho pushed through the pain in order to shake his head as much as he could.
"Nope. He was doing a good job of that all by himself." Jorginho answered with a twinkle in his eye and mouth stretching more comfortably wide now that it was only crusted blood that he had to worry about. James' arms were back supporting him. He just missed those dimples underneath the pads of his fingers. "He was doing so well. Well, until he somehow tripped and ended up in the mouth of his parent."
James had never met anybody who so freely saved the day but also oozed such joy when somebody – or something – didn't need his assistance at all. Until he met Jorginho, of course.
Sharing a look over at Lynne and causing her shoulders to wriggle at the fact he was at least aware of her presence, James knew that he shouldn't, but he couldn't help but chuckle at this image. Supposedly, he knew it must've come to a happy ending since Jorginho had been present and he was still smiling.
Turning back to the other male, he took a fraction of a moment to hold his own hands in front of himself before glancing over at Jorginho and back again, wordlessly trying to figure out why, if the poor little Squirtle had found itself in the Blastoise's mouth, more than just his concealed hands were in tatters.
"But…" James murmured, about to give up and look over at Jorginho and allow him to explain for himself when he suddenly realized. It wasn't just his friend's armor that lit up the room there and then. The beaming smile indicated that he had guessed correctly. "Oh, Jorginho!" he exclaimed, considering shoving him about the shoulder before it dawned on him that that soreness of his leg paired with the heaviness of his armor might send him toppling! "Haven't I told you to stop sticking your head so near to mouths? It doesn't end well."
Lynne watched as a grown man became a reminiscent of the young son that she used to have before he grew up and positively became as alight as the sun that looked down on all the Pokémon World as he gleefully corrected.
"I put my head right in the mouth." He explained, unable to resist his own urge to shove against a shoulder and almost accidentally rendering James injured as well as the metal of his shoulder pad collided with a softer one. Immediately, he took his turn drawing his friend closer to him before he toppled over. Then, he cheerfully pointed over to his helmet residing on the countertop. "I'm so lucky I didn't lose that."
In hindsight, Lynne told me that she couldn't help but wonder if Jorginho was referring to the incident or how James had taken hold of it long before she could even think about helping them both out in this way. She wasn't clueless towards how Jorginho treated that piece of armor like it was a relic that no museum could convince him to give up to them.
But still, was her use merely finding Jorginho until he was in the preferred hands?
"You're lucky to didn't lose more than your helmet. But like I said, we can get you fixed up." James patted the gadget adorned as well as glove concealed, tattered hand of Jorginho's before his hip moved against his from the side, indicating that he was going to move him to be sitting in the kitchen. However, he turned to Lynne first, her own hip feeling the heat of a grateful touch. "Thank you for bringing him to the right place, my love." He smiled at Lynne fully for the first time since they had all been in the room. "Do you think you can run a bath for him? You can do it in me and Jess' bathroom if you don't mind."
And with that, Lynne experienced an unusual sensation of wondering if she could focus on the long awaited for touch on her hip, the worded gratitude that James was expressing or the fact that she had been left just standing there up until that moment.
In the end, she felt him smile at her and she was even softened by the almost child-like grin of Jorginho looking back at her as well. She suddenly felt as if he wasn't the only one weak at the knees!
She giddily did not hesitate to comply with what James was asking of her now that he had blessed her with some of his attention.
"Of course, Jim Dear. Happy to help." She answered both of his sentences towards her in one. And then, as his body lurched towards hers, she prepared to place both of her porcelain hands upon his caring shoulders and plant a loving kiss onto that hollow cheek of his.
However, James was momentarily close to her for a different reason. He turned to hold onto Jorginho's other side in order to walk him over to one of the seats in the kitchen. His affection hadn't entirely run dry, however, although from Lynne's point of view it may as well have.
He didn't give her the chance to press an actual kiss to his cheek and instead blew her one. But then, his attention was back on his friend. And Lynne was left having to ponder why she felt this way while she ran a bath in the other room when she was so very used to sharing.
Without too much of an external struggle, James managed to walk Jorginho over to the kitchen island countertop in which he had previously been sitting alone with his sketchpad, pencils and ideas and even somehow hitched him up onto one of the bar stools so he could sit as comfortably as he could manage while James fetched everything that he needed to fix him up.
Jorginho made a point of jokingly entwining his ankles with James' before he left him for a couple of moments, leaving him warm in the cheeks at being teased but more so giving him a look of squinted eyes and two frown lines appearing between his eyebrows, indicating that he probably had enough strength to walk on his own legs if he could do that!
He could hear Jorginho's chuckles from behind him as he lost himself in the medicine cabinet. And then, once they had died down, he was back in front of him again, armed with a pile of plasters, antibacterial wound cleansing wipes, cream and even strips to hold wounds together.
In hindsight, I laugh, because most of his children had long since grown up! But then again, he did live with Jordan in the vicinity too. And his house was Jorginho's top pick to go when injuries presented themselves.
"I really don't know how at your big age you haven't learned not to stick your head into dangerous places." James told him with the corner of his mouth quirking up and causing the moustache part of his goatee beard to tilt in the same way after he had edged his own bar stool in front of Jorginho's. Before he set to mopping up with a wipe that would surely sting, he teased him in his own way by humorously tickling the greying parts of his beard that managed to stretch across more of his cheeks than his own. "It's becoming a problem."
Jorginho knew what that tone of voice as flat as the roads that he used to skate along as a young adult meant and so he laughed, that gesture of his prevailing even while James mopped him up and some of the healing product got into some of the grazes in between the hairs of his chin.
He managed not to wriggle around too much as he said words of his own, having to dull down his usual animation during the cleaning up procedure.
"Hey, I think you have yourself to blame for it looking so enticing." He said and it caused James to squint over at him and not because he had foolishly rid himself of his glasses earlier on and he wanted to get his friend completely cleaned up. "Remember when your Pokémon would always try and swallow you whole? That always looked so fun."
If there had been another audience member, then James would have surely shared a deadpan look with them, inwardly and very outwardly too wondering how him sometimes fearing for his life in the hands (or rather, mouth) of his grass Pokémon could ever seem like fun to an onlooker.
But then again, James had learned a very long time ago not to expect Jorginho to say things or act like he was any other ordinary member of the public.
Revolving his eyes inside their sockets as he got a fresh wipe out of the packet to clean up the crimson crust underneath Jorginho's nostrils that the handkerchief had been unable to tackle, he then couldn't help but laugh, having not distant memories at the way that some Pokémon of his in particular did indeed show their affection.
"What do you mean, used to?" he questioned, watching as Jorginho's eyes appeared very wide and white in comparison to all of the blood that had stopped staining his face but was soddening the antiseptic wipes. "They still very much do."
A pleased and low chuckle deep inside Jorginho sounded.
"Cool." Jorginho breathed out of his lips. Then, after his own mouth quirked upwards again, James' eyes locked on his more seriously.
He had thrown used wipes into the bin and, with clean hands, was gently tracing his finger along a new, oozing dent in Jorginho's forehead.
"You need to make sure you wear your helmet when you're out and about, Jorginho." James reminded him, and, although he didn't show it as his fingers continually traced along the slight gash in his forehead, inspecting it, he was taken aback by the lips pressing together of his friend, revealing dimples like two segments of fruit, and the small nod of his head that followed. "And be careful in general coming here straight from work."
In the same way that James was surprised by Jorginho's compliance from the years of knowing him as a young man who sometimes liked to bend the rules simply just to mold them in his own way, Jorginho understood what these words meant without him needing to elaborate.
For the first time on that day and even since being injured, he tilted his head on the side as much as he could without giving himself excruciating pain and his eyes dropped down, considering.
Then, his eyes were back on his friend. And his tattered hand reached out and touched a place on James' thigh that wasn't protected with heavy metal like his was.
"I'll be more careful. The last thing I want is to put you and your family in any kind of danger." His voice lowered, and James knew that he meant every word. His fingers were no longer investigating the wounds on his forehead but part of him wondered if they needed another inspection there and then. "It's just," Jorginho's continuation caused James' hands to occupy themselves with his own, untouched leg. "It feels right coming here when I'm hurt. I don't know. I know I can rely on you."
As Jorginho's touch began to occupy itself with ridding himself of the weaponry that clung onto the back of his hands as well as his wrists before taking his gloves off as well, revealing surprisingly smooth and unscathed albeit clammy hands, James' own touch on himself faltered when he heard these words.
Wow, he thought to himself. For someone who had been given such a hard time for quitting the organization back in the day, he was flattered to know he had garnered his reputation back as someone who could be relied on.
Inside, he wished that he were still wearing his brown, round rimmed glasses so he could adjust them for something to do before finding his own words. As he found them as Jorginho's clean hands roamed through drying yet still disheveled brown locks, he couldn't help but feel like the words he stumbled on were rather lame in response.
"Of course." Was all he managed to express for once, even though the sentiment inside of him longed to say more. He took a brief break from Jorginho to fetch his glasses then when he was sat back in front of him again, he could not stop humor from portraying their connection rather than sweetness. "Maybe you should try not putting yourself in danger as well."
And with that, Jorginho's hands seemed to grow entirely bored with playing with his own hair as they abruptly plopped out from in between strands and he grinned instead, experiencing James getting back to the clean up operation and this time, mopping at the gash in his head before applying strips to keep it together and dry without the need of proper medical attention.
James had never really known Jorginho to search for that anyway. Even back when he was barely twenty years old, he would often walk into their shared Team Rocket dormitory together to him lifting his own t-shirt up in his teeth and using both hands to tend to a gasping wound at the side of his hip.
He tried not to wonder whether he still had all his marks.
Jorginho, on the other hand, allowed himself to wonder if his friend always kept that medical gear in his cupboard or it was since their friendship had rekindled that he stocked the healing strips.
A part of him thought about asking. But then, as he sent that soft, brown gaze of his around Jessie and James' kitchen, he decided against it, realizing that he was far more intrigued by all that he was seeing around him as well as the caring attention that one of his longest friend's was giving him.
Not that he would ever have even murmured these words, but Jessie and James together had made the kind of house that he had always dreamed about. It wasn't the size that he was impressed by, no, even though it made his solo room back at Team Rocket look truly pathetic, it was other things about it which made the place he knew home so very empty.
The fridge was always stocked and there were always notes clinging to the outside. One partner reminded the other what they needed for the weekly shop. James' kids teasing one and other with questionable nicknames spelled out in magnetic lettering even though most of them had long since moved out.
Pictures. Memories. Sonograms. There was always a baby on the way for someone! They had vinyl records hanging from the walls. One, sometimes two of James' guitars that didn't fit in the number of his other rooms. Posters of movie stars. Rock stars. Heroes. Quotes. And not the cliché kind. The kind that didn't actually spell out everyone is welcome here but did so in their own way.
Jorginho felt truly welcome there. And that was very flattering inside of him – like a hint of forgiveness when it came to James – because he knew that he had once behaved in a way that gave both James, Jessie and Meowth too every reason to show him the door.
"Are you getting restless now?" James broke Jorginho's reverie by this question, for a rare occasion reading him incorrectly and believing that he longed to move about a little more rather than feel him pinching his skin together before placing a strip there, softly smoothing it with the pad of his finger. "I'm nearly done here. Then I need to just check your leg if you think that's cut up."
Surprising them both due to how lost in observation he had been – both inward and outward – Jorginho was quick to shake his head, denying both James' own wrong observation as well as wordlessly sharing that his leg only needed rest, no true medical attention.
After Jorginho's head swung barely an inch side to side, another thing piqued his interest, this time on the kitchen countertop, and it was this that prompted him to actually speak his observation aloud.
"Were you drawing before I interrupted you?" he asked. Perhaps a bit of a foolish question from the way that he could see the pencils scattered both on the counter and the floor, as well as the sketchpad open wide and a discarded, smoldering herbal cigarette in an ash tray. James only just had the chance to nod. "Can I see?"
In the split second between James nodding a second time while removing himself from the stool to fetch the beginning of his creation, Jorginho's entire mind filled with color. And not because he was having a funny turn from his injuries!
His drawings when he had been honing his craft back in Team Rocket had been few and far between but each time that he did reach for the pencil, it was anyone's guess what he was going to create. Over the years – years and years and years – he had gravitated more and more to portraits. How he treasured capturing his loved ones in his mind's eye, even if he was hesitant to share them every time.
Jorginho had no indication what he was going to lay his gaze on when James began making his way back towards him and it suddenly dawned on him that he hoped that he could see at least something because he was not wearing his glasses! And anybody who knew him learned that he used either them or nothing.
He didn't need to fret. When James gave him the honor of holding his page freely for himself rather than holding it up in front of him, Jorginho could see everything that there was to see and he could feel the love that had been put on it without needing to trace his finger along the lines, smudging the creation in front of him.
Even though Jorginho became the dazzling star for the space themed backdrop that the drawing would go on to have, James still coughed shyly as he seated himself again, going on to roam a hand through his darkening, chin length locks.
"It's for Justin and Sammy's little girl when she finally arrives. They wanted something for her room. I'm going to watercolor it." He informed him and immediately, Jorginho's head bobbed for the first time freely, earth toned eyes of his already imagining the comforting green he would create with the popping color behind it for the nursery of a baby girl. "It's a bit of a weird creature. But it's what they wanted, and I think you'll know of it."
Jorginho didn't hesitate to nod more and more, for once not berating James for the fact he wasn't quite so into the sci fi franchises that both Justin, Sammy and indeed he were into. And he didn't have the chance to go on to do it either. James didn't notice Jorginho squinting without his glasses at all and yet, out of habit, he removed his ones from his own face and offered them to him.
Soon enough, Jorginho was wearing them, and his eyes were becoming glassier than what was contained inside the rims. He still had not let go of James' page, no longer needing to nod.
"It's beautiful." He gushed, leaving James to not know whether he meant the creature or his drawing before deciding that he didn't mind either way. Jorginho's lips pressed together and made his soft face appear even more gentle before he finally handed the artwork back over to his friend. "I can't believe before we know it, she'll be here."
After James decided to make a stretch and put the drawing alongside the helmet still loitering on the countertop rather than leaving the other man alone for another occasion, he was about to copy Jorginho's countenance of eyes growing misty and cheeks warming as he too nodded his head now that he had stopped.
He had so many words to utter, all along the same sentiment and he wanted nothing more than to share them, knowing that both he and his good friend felt the same exact way as one of their son's and one of their little brother's bringing life into the world – together.
However, James believed that Jorginho's wince was due to something else rather than the emotion of being on the cusp of being an uncle for the very first time.
He finally returned Jorginho's prior touch, his hand reaching out to the soft material of his clothed leg rather than the amor of steel just below it.
"Are you in pain?" James asked him, concern in his eyes. If it had been any other occasion, Jorginho could have been known to nod his head fervently and clutch his heart, announcing his heart was in such blissful pain at the idea of a new arrival! This didn't occur, though, and Jorginho wasn't given the chance to respond either way. "Can I get you anything for it?"
In the same way that Jorginho stepped foot in an actual hospital once in a blue moon, he also deemed it necessary to take pain medication even less. To tell you the truth, he had refused it for worse injuries than a mishap with a disciplinarian Blastoise!
All the same, he didn't bother to speak of this to James, certainly not ridicule him for such an idea when getting all sorts of injuries were part of the job description for his role in Team Rocket. Instead, his eyes remaining as soft as they had been when they were discussing the little baby soon to connect them both, he managed a shake of his head and a smile too.
And yet, his words would go on to announce that he did wish for at least something.
"A hug would be cool." He suggested, the sunbeams of his face meeting the gaze of James before he looked down, removing his friend's glasses off his own face instead, before only just putting the tips of them against where his ears met sparse strands of hair. He pushed them properly on him only as he added, smiling again. "You've done a lot for me today."
And with that, it took everything in James' power to keep his gaze steady and not look down like Jorginho had done seconds before. As he felt his friend's sunny disposition melting into him, he knew no way he was going to do anything other than comply and, soon enough, he was on his feet, ready to do whatever it took to make him feel better.
But hadn't Jorginho firstly said that everything was fine?!
"Sure." He said, pushing the bar stool from loitering behind him with the back of his foot since he had hopped down from it, adjusting his glasses as well even though Jorginho hadn't done a bad job of placing them there. "Let me just sort you out so I don't end up with any dents in me as well.
Jorginho hummed cluelessly, but he would go on to be clued in as James' hands reached for him and, starting with his sleek armor concealing his chest, he went on to remove him of his shoulder pad so the thing that protected him when he was on duty didn't make mishaps for anyone else once he had finished work for the day.
His studious albeit consoling gaze dropped down, watching the way that his fingers worked, removing him of what he protected himself with before leaving alongside his helmet as well.
He liked how he took the time to make sure everything was in one piece.
After that deed was done, although Jorginho probably indeed owed him a hug for taking care of him so well, James acted like he couldn't move his arms at all, moving closer and wrapping his own arms around him before lifting Jorginho's ones too, encouraging him to embrace him back.
He always felt a lot more on show when he was without his armor, especially when he was in the uncomfortable state of wearing some of it and other parts of it being removed. But with James, there and then, it didn't bother him. He knew what he would be getting himself into and he embraced it. He embraced it in the same manner that he embraced his friend.
Hard!
However, James copied him in the same way and wrapped his own arms fully around him in return. They had lost so many years together, all fueled with disconnection until eventual spiteful indifference. That acknowledgment usually came out in the way that they held each other during the moments that these opportunities came about.
Wordlessly, they knew that they were foolish. But more than that, they were fortunate. You didn't often get second chances. That was probably why they didn't shy away from showing another man affection in the way that other men might.
"You really need to start being more careful, Jorginho." James mumbled to him as their embrace was gradually ending, catching him off guard because sometime in between rhythmically patting his friend in between his shoulder blades, his eyes had fluttered shut. They couldn't help but open as James pulled away from him as the time was right, almost accidentally bumping their noses against each other as they departed. "I can think a number of people who would be disappointed if anything serious happened to this face of yours."
James was fully away from Jorginho at this point. His finger, however, broke the distance with him all over again as he playfully flicked the strong structure of a nose with which he had just almost collided.
Out of habit, Jorginho scrunched his face together in return, causing his crow's feet to joyously etch next to his eyes more than usual. And then he laughed aloud, the sunbeams inside of him getting set free all over again.
He couldn't help but do anything other than agree.
"I'll keep that in mind." He decided to comply, bare fist of his reaching out and pretending to ball into a fist that longed to jokingly collide with James' jaw, changing its mind at the last minute and gently patting the side of his face instead.
James spoke past his pupils itching to cross together to watch Jorginho's hand land on him and trail away from him in the few breaths that followed.
"Do you feel like watching a movie to feel better?" he asked, and happiness bubbled inside of him and erupted outward in the form of laughter from the way that his friend's expression resembled a canine's joy at hearing their owner utter a very fateful word! He didn't even need to nod, neck pain or otherwise. "Show me something you love."
James went on to help Jorginho off the bar stool, immediately being there to not only have his bulky weight to lean into him but to guide him through to the sofa in the other room. And, as he reached to hold onto his hand for extra leverage, even though those digits of his were removed of all weaponry, he still held onto them and guided him from the same place as if he were loaded up.
Old habits would die hard. And speaking of hard, he had learnt that way a long time ago!
James may not have had many lessons to learn on that day, but Lynne very well did have. It became so very apparent to her that both her partner and Jorginho had forgotten about the bath that she had been made to run for the injured man when she followed the noise of a film fanfare starting up in another room and found them both still together.
It had worked well that James had taken Jorginho's shoulder armor off earlier on because it meant that, as the two of them prepared to watch the movie together from the same sofa, he at least had somewhere to lounge as he went on to view something that he wouldn't exactly have chosen himself!
Tension really is a peculiar thing. You would never think that it presented itself in the room so filled with brotherhood and laughter but Lynne certainly felt it engulfing her when she stepped just one foot past the threshold to see Jorginho with his legs resting, stretched outwards onto a footstool, remote in hand and already clueing James in to the kind of thing he would go on to see while James was listening to him, cheek resting against his shoulder of all places.
Lynne had pushed those words from Jessie to the quietest crevices of her mind a decade ago. So why, oh why, did they have to come sweltering back on that particular day?
Lynne needed to rest her hand backwards to support herself as if she were the one with an injured leg and her hand swanned to her heart, wishing that she had her own armor there to protect her. But to protect her from what…?
She was being so very silly, wasn't she?
Jorginho's arm rested over the back of the sofa and James seemed to pay more attention to his inside information of the movie rather than the movie itself.
That was the trouble with pushing things away. And that was the trouble about not communicating your fears aloud, allowing the other person to reassure the burdens on your mind. They would always come back. And when they did, they would knock for six.
Inhaling shakily, Lynne decided to forget about it the way that they had both forgotten about Jorginho's bath.
Jessie hadn't been right back then. So, there was no way that she would be right on that day, a decade later.
Jessie was wrong. She was wrong, wasn't she?
Wasn't she…?
She didn't wish to find out on that day.
But one day, she would simply have to.
The End.
There you go! Thanks so much for reading and I hope you enjoyed :) It's amazing how long someone's words can ring in your mind, isn't it? Of course, it wasn't pleasant for Lynne to hear them back then when she had only just been able to discover a new layer to a growing bond with James. But I think, in a way, Jessie was doing a decent thing. Both of them in the first half were coming to the conclusion that James has a wandering heart - there's no doubt about it - even if he doesn't do anything about it until permission is granted. From Lynne's point of view, her being from heaven and getting to fall for James is entirely magical and a once in a million occurrence so she - nor James at this moment in time - has the idea of polyamory cross any minds. James just happened to fall in love with someone so ethereal that his wanting more is because it's Lynne. He does not want or need anybody else and would love her as friends regardless of what kind of relationship they could pursue. The second half of the chapter sure makes Lynne wonder though! I wonder if on any other day that she would have just seen James and Jorginho sitting together and smiled, thinking it was good they managed to reunite as friends? But, on this day, she is riddled with insecurity. Is it warranted? I look forward to exploring James and Jorginho's friendship that spans across decades. There's certainly a lot more to come! Enough rambling from me though! Thanks again for reading and I will see you again on Wednesday to update this story again so see you then!
Amy signing out :P