The next morning, Rachel woke up on the sofa with a heavy heart and a pounding headache. She groaned as the daylight shone through the window and onto her face.
Her skin was raw from crying and her eyes felt swollen and puffy. More than anything, she wanted to curl up into a ball, bury herself in the blankets and sleep forever to avoid the pain of her broken heart.
Her stomach had other ideas as it began to churn violently. Rachel shot up from the sofa, dashing into the kitchen, only just making it as she vomited into the sink. She groaned, the pounding in her head only increasing.
She'd missed Eddie from the second she'd told him to leave. The house felt empty without him there. She missed him, she needed him. But she couldn't have him. She'd wanted to trust him, she really had. Eddie was the one person she thought would never hurt her or let her down. But he had.
She wiped her mouth with a tissue, managing a small sip of water before going back into the living room, curling up in the blankets.
As she lay there, thinking about him, she started to cry again. Despite what had happened, she really had cared deeply for Eddie. She still did. He was the one person she'd felt safe with, the one person she could be herself around. He had seen the best and worst sides of her and had stood by her regardless. She'd told him things she'd never told anyone, she'd trusted him so much.
She loved Eddie Lawson, there was no denying it. She'd fallen head over heels for him. And she'd let herself. And he'd broken her heart.
A knock on the front door pulled Rachel from her thoughts. She sat up, wiping her eyes quickly as she walked over to the front door, not caring about the fact her hair was a mess, or that she was in her pyjamas.
She groaned when she saw Steph standing on her doorstep.
"Is that how you greet a friend?" Steph asked with a smirk
"Go away, Steph. I'm really not in the mood for company" she huffed
"I just want five minutes, Rachel. Five minutes and then you can throw me out, I promise" Steph pleaded
Rachel rolled her eyes, moving aside so Steph could come in.
The two women went through to the lounge, Rachel sitting back where she was before Steph had arrived. Normally, she would have offered Steph a cup of tea or coffee, but Steph had said five minutes, and it was going to stay that way. Offering Steph a drink would give her the impression she wanted her to stay.
Steph sat on the sofa opposite, studying Rachel carefully. It was obvious she'd been crying. That was confirmation for Steph that she was just as torn up about all of this as Eddie had been last night.
"How are you?" Steph asked, breaking the deafening silence
"Fine" Rachel mumbled, refusing to look at her
"You could be a little more convincing than that, Rachel"
Rachel rolled her eyes
"You only want to know so you have some gossip to take back to the staff room!" she shot back bitterly
"You clearly don't know me that well then, if you think that's why I'm here" Steph sighed
"Oh, I think I know you very well Steph! I've met plenty of people like you before! Eddie might have been naive and trusted you, but I don't!" She snapped, glaring at her
"Rachel, do you know why Eddie called me the night you were attacked?" She questioned
"No, but I guess you're going to tell me anyway" Rachel shrugged
"He called me that night because he was scared. He'd found you unconscious on your bathroom floor, covered in blood and bruises. You were rushed to the Hospital and out his sight immediately. When I got to him, he was in a mess. He didn't know if you were going to make it. He was traumatised by what he'd seen, Rachel. It had shaken him so much. And despite all of that, he was blaming himself for what happened to you"
"But it wasn't his fault Steph" Rachel sighed
"I know, but he blamed himself because he'd sat in the pub, thinking you'd stood him up. When he found out the truth, all he could think about was how he'd let you down Rachel. He really cares about you and he is haunted by what happened to you. It wasn't a topic of gossip for him or for me. He needed a friend, Rachel. I just wanted to be that. No one else knows about this, I promise you, and they will never hear about it from me"
Rachel sighed. Listening to Steph had made her realise that both Eddie and Steph would never use her as an excuse to gossip. She had jumped to conclusions yet again. Eddie wouldn't hurt her like that. He had been scarred by this just as much as she had, she just hadn't realised how much.
"Now that we've cleared the air on that topic, let's address the other elephant in the room, your job" Steph declared
"I'm not going back Steph, I can't" Rachel whispered tearfully
"So, what? You're just leaving? Exiting out the back door, leaving all the kids behind? It's not your style Rachel"
Rachel huffed. Steph didn't understand.
"I have to leave, Steph" she said
Steph sighed. She was determined to get through to Rachel. She wasn't leaving Waterloo Road. Steph would persuade her to stay, even if it killed her.
"Rachel, do you know what I thought of you when you first came to Waterloo Road?" she asked
Rachel rolled her eyes. Steph agreed, probably not the best opening line!
"No, Steph, I don't. But I can guess" she replied with a weak smile
"I thought you were a stuck up, prissy, cold hearted cow" Steph finished
Rachel raised an eyebrow at Steph, wondering where she was going with this speech.
"And now?" She asked
"Nothing, that's pretty much it" Steph shrugged
Rachel rolled her eyes again. She was tempted to throw Steph out. Steph saw the annoyance in her face, quickly deciding to cut the sarcastic comments and get to her point.
"But, you're a bloody good Head Teacher, Rachel. Best I've ever had. And I don't know how, but you manage to make Waterloo Road work. Which is why, I can't understand why you're prepared to hand things over to some other maniac who doesn't genuinely care!" she continued
Steph's words were kind, and Rachel appreciated them. But they didn't change her mind.
"The LEA will find someone who does care; there are plenty of people out there. Eddie being one of them" she argued
Steph sighed
"Rachel, you're missing the point, it doesn't matter who they give the job to. You can't just give up like this! Stuart Hordley is about to ruin your life and career, and you're letting him!" Steph exclaimed
Rachel looked at her, eyes filled with tears.
"He ruined my life when he attacked and raped me, Steph" she responded, her voice cracking with emotion
She burst into tears.
Steph was looking at a broken woman who had lost her spark, her confidence and her dignity. She hated seeing any woman like this, especially Rachel, who was always so headstrong and sure of herself with everything. She was in pain because of one cruel, manipulative and vile man. She had to make it right.
Steph quickly moved to sit beside her, taking Rachel's hand into her own.
"Rachel, look at me. I need you to listen to me, ok?" Steph instructed
Rachel lifted her head up, looking directly into Steph's eyes. Steph smiled at her reassuringly, wiping away her tears with her hand. She finally had her attention.
"You can build your life back up from this Rachel, it's not too late. You have a choice, you can let Stuart Hordley go to prison, knowing he's ruined you, or you can prove him wrong by walking back into Waterloo Road with your head held high! And you won't be alone; we will back you all the way"
Rachel shook her head
"Before you jumped to conclusions with Eddie last night, did you actually look at the petition Bolton made?" Steph asked, trying a new tactic
Rachel didn't answer.
Steph picked up the papers from the coffee table and handed them to Rachel. She took them with a sigh.
"That petition was made by a kid who cares about you staying at Waterloo Road. He cares so much that he spent all day yesterday, getting everyone to sign it. He didn't do it for no reason, Rachel, and no one told him to either. You turned Bolton's life around when we all thought he was beyond saving. You were patient with him and you helped him"
"Anyone else would have done the same" Rachel shrugged
"No, Rachel, they wouldn't! Look at all those signatures and messages! You've made a huge difference to the lives of all these kids! They look up to you Rachel, so do the staff. You made Waterloo Road a success. It won't stay that way without you" Steph protested
"And between you and me, I personally can't stand Eddie walking up and down the corridors like a lost puppy for the rest of my life!" She added, smiling
Rachel giggled at that.
She flipped through the papers, every signature and message she read making her eyes fill with tears. In all this time, she'd forgotten how much she loved her job, how much she loved the pupils and the school. Stuart had taken a lot from her, but he could never take away her passion for teaching. She wanted to go back, and suddenly it was starting to feel possible. It was time for Miss Mason to return to Waterloo Road.
"So, will you come back?" Steph asked, breaking the silence
"If you're that desperate!" Rachel said sarcastically, unable to wipe the smile off her face
She found herself wrapping her arms around Steph tightly.
"Thank you, Steph" she whispered
Steph smiled, pulling apart from her
"Just do me a favour, be in school bright and early after half term, eh?"
"Of course" Rachel nodded with a small laugh
"And sort things out with Eddie" Steph reminded
"I don't expect him to forgive me after the way I lashed out at him last night" Rachel sighed
"Just talk to him, that's the first step to putting it right, eh?" Steph reassured
Rachel nodded, walking Steph to the front door.
"I'll see you soon, ok?" Steph smiled, heading out onto the drive
Rachel nodded
"Bye Steph"
She watched her drive away before grabbing her phone from the kitchen. Steph was right; she had to fix things with Eddie. She couldn't lose him.
She typed out a text to him:
"I would call, but I know you're working. I just wanted to say I'm sorry. Can you come over later so we can talk?"
Satisfied, she sent it.
It was somehow already 2:30 in the afternoon, so Rachel hoped Eddie would see and respond to her text soon.
In the meantime, she went upstairs to have a shower and to change clothes, hoping all the while that Eddie would be willing to talk.