Captain Blues: Ahoy-hoy! Captain Blues of the SS FleetingDream here and let's jump right into the new chapter!

Persona V: Reversing the Wheel of Fate
Chapter Forty-Two

[Opening Scene: Shibuya – Okumura Residence (Evening)
Theme of Okumura Residence: Have a Short Rest from Persona 5]

"All of that food was delicious," Ren sighed out as he looked at Haru with a smile. "You did not have to do that, Haru."

After Ryuji and Ann walked in, Ren, Morgana, and Mishima walked in a few minutes later, leaving nine of them overall to enjoy the food.

"S-So much food," Mishima sighed out with a smile on his face. "I can't remember the last time I ate so much."

"Yeah, you really didn't have to do this, Haru," Ann said.

"But we are so glad you did," Ryuji added.

"I know, but as my friends, you all will need to get used to me treating you guys," Haru said with a smile as all of her friends happily ate away.

"So, you guys want to tell us what happened with Mishima today?" Shiho asked.

"Fuck, where do we even begin?" Ryuji asked.

"Wait, before we go telling about our day," Morgana interrupted. "We should inquire about these two." Morgana motioned to Hifumi and Makoto.

"Yeah, we should ask about you two before we get into that," Ann said, reiterating what Morgana and just said.

"Meeting start," Ren said, instantly snapping into his "Leader Mode."

[Theme of Meeting: Paulownia Mall from Persona 3]

"Makoto, would you be okay with me telling everyone what's going on with you, or would you rather do it?" Ren asked.

"If it is alright, Ren, I will do it," Makoto said before she added, "Thank you for asking," with a smile on her face.

Ren grinned.

"There has been a presence with me for as long as I can remember," Makoto began. "It was always watching, Until the day Ren was attacked by Kamoshida's henchmen. Since then, it's been taunting me. Up until yesterday, I was able to ignore its digs at me, but…."

Makoto sighed.

"The night before last night, my sister and I got into a disagreement regarding the Phantom Thieves, and she…." Makoto paused, only for Ren to place a hand on her right shoulder while Shiho took her left hand.

Makoto looked at them both and saw that each of them had a supportive smile on their faces. Seeing them both smile at her, of all people, with support filled Makoto with determination. "She called said I was useless to her. I believe that, along with Principal Kobayakawa's request in bringing in the Phantom Thieves, caused this being to become strong enough to bite me," Makoto told them.

"What? You got bit by it?" Ann asked.

"Principal No-Neck is trying to have you guys go after us?!" Ryuji exclaimed.

"You guys are the Phantom Thieves?" Hifumi questioned with a stunned expression.

Everyone turned to Hifumi in surprise before Haru said, "That's right. You didn't know. Yes, we are the Phantom Thieves of Hearts."

"You guys should have led with that," Morgana said.

"We should have told you first," Shiho told Hifumi. "We apologize."

"Don't apologize. It's just…Everyone is talking about you guys," Hifumi said. "And here I am, unknowingly eating with you. Life is strange in that way, isn't it?"

Mishima and Makoto nodded in unison before Makoto said, "When Ren and I became friends, he promised to help, and right before the situation with Sumire reared its head, we were trying to figure something out. And that is where I stand."

"Good," Haru said. "Hifumi-chan, if you may?"

Hifumi nodded and said, "Unlike Makoto-san, I very recently started to hear this voice. It was after a Shogi match. I was distracted," Hifumi paused to glance at Haru briefly. "But somehow, I had won the match. My opponent did not capitalize on my distracted nature and just allowed me to win. I was confused."

"After talking to my mother, she finally appeared, a shade that looked just like me. She's been taunting me since," Hifumi finished.

"What you both are seeing are your shadows selves," Morgana said, which prompted Ren to repeat what he said.

"Shadows?" Makoto and Hifumi asked in unison.

Ren nodded.

"Your Shadow Selves are repressed negative thoughts and impulses of you. They are the yin to your yang, the heads to your tails, the peanut butter to your chocolate, the strawberry to your shortcake. Basically, they are you, only uninhibited and amplified to threatening proportions," Morgana explained.

Ren repeated Morgana's words, then added, "We've encountered our Shadow Selves throughout the incident with Kamoshida. We were able to accept them. Therefore it granted us the use of our Personas."

"So when she said that she was 'Thy True Self,' she meant it," Makoto murmured.

"The thing about Shadows is this," Morgana began. "They want you to accept and acknowledge them as part of yourself, no matter how bad that they are. But the more you fight it, the more you deny it, the angrier they become."

Ren relayed Morgana's words, but it was Shiho who said, "But that's what I don't get. My Shadow tried to kill me. If I had accepted her, I would not be here."

Morgana nodded at this and said, "The more you deny them, the angrier they become until they start to harm you, then eventually kill you. Your shadow, Shiho, was at that point, while Hifumi's sounds more cordial with her."

Ren relayed this to Hifumi and Makoto, who nodded in understanding.

"Mine was pretty cordial too," Mishima finally spoke, prompting everyone to look to him. "She was very nice. She just wanted me to acknowledge her. I didn't feel like I was in danger, even when she was threatening all of your lives…."

"So depending on when your Shadow makes contact with you, it could be cordial or a raging villain," Ryuji summarized. "Explains why mine outright punched me."

"And why mine only told me what I needed to hear," Ann said.

"I think I understand it," Makoto said. "There are three levels to this then—cordial – angry - deadly. The more we deny that darker half of ourselves, the angrier our shadow selves become. Mine is in the second stage, while yours, Hifumi-san, must be at the first stage."

"Hm, I agree. But how should we accept it?" Hifumi asked. "It's not easing accepting a part of yourself, especially if there are some hard truths to it."

"Honestly," Shiho murmured, "It was extremely tough. I had to accept that I saw myself how others wanted to see me. Weak and submissive. What made my Shadow become my persona was accepting that part of myself and vowing to become strong enough to stand on my own two feet."

Shiho looked to Makoto, then to Hifumi, then finally Haru. "I don't know what is causing your issues with your shadows, and it's not my business to know unless you all tell us. But you, and you alone, can change it and not fall to its anger."

The three girls slowly nodded, but all three wore apprehensive expressions on their faces. Makoto stood up and said, "I'm going to go for a walk. I need to clear my head."

"As do I," Hifumi said.

Haru turned to the two of them with a frown.

"Don't worry," Hifumi said to Haru. "I don't intend to tell anyone about you guys being the thieves. Not when you guys finally answered something about this Shadow that plagues me. I just need to think about what you guys said."

"Same. I don't know how to reconcile with this Shadow Self, but I will try. I just need to think on how," Makoto tacked on.

"Take all the time you need," Shiho said with a smile.

"You both will be back up here later, yeah?" Ryuji asked.

The two girls nodded.

"Then go," Ren told them. "We'll be here."

"Thanks," Makoto said before the two walked away, leaving the group to watch them walk out the door.

"I'm going to follow them," Morgana said before he hopped out of the seat ran out the door before it closed.

"You think they'll be able to accept them?" Ann asked.

"It's hard to say for now," Ren said as he crossed his arms.

"I believe Hifumi will," Haru whispered. "If anyone could outplay her Shadow Self, it's her. As for Makoto and myself, I am unsure. At least as of right now."

"Now," Shiho said as she looked to Mishima. "What happened to you guys? You all came in looking rough and exhausted."

"Shit was fucked," Ryuji instantly began. "So, a few hard confirms. Madarame does have a palace. He thinks of his pupils as his property and not even human. Just art machines."

"That's horrible!" Both Haru and Shiho gasped out.

"It was bad…." Ann said.

"How did you guys discover the palace?" Haru asked.

"It was actually a combination of all of us," Ren said. "After meeting with Yusuke at the museum and that horrendous shack, we were able to get the code words needed. It was Mishima himself who got the last word in. Unfortunately, that transported us all to the palace."

"Wait, so Mishima…." Shiho murmured.

Mishima nodded and said, "Yeah. I was taken there."

"Wow," Haru whispered.

"Yeah. It was so weird, but that wasn't all that happened," Mishima said. "After I was told about everything, Morgana and I were waiting by the exit when my Shadow Self attacked. Everything went black after that," Mishima finished.

"Yeah. His Shadow Self busted into the museum, tossed Morgana at us, then told us to run. In hindsight, we should have just taken his advice because we were swamped with shadows. We nearly got killed," Ann said. "If not for Mishima and his persona."

"You have a Persona?!" Haru and Shiho exclaimed.

Mishima flushed and nodded.

"He did great in his first showing," Ren said with approval before he turned and asked, "What type of Persona was that anyways, Mishima?"

Mishima smiled and said, "Her name is Eilistraee. She uses healing and gravity spells. But speaking of her….I need to tell you all something."

[Theme of Sadness: Living with Determination from Persona 3]

"Eilistraee is also the goddess of redemption, and the first step to that redemption is honesty," Mishima told them. "I hide something from you all…."

"What do you mean?" Ann asked.

"I had an ulterior motive for creating the Phan-Site," Mishima admitted. "I created it because I was going to use it to blackmail you guys."

"You what?!" Ryuji exclaimed.

"Hear him out, Ryuji-nii," Shiho said as she placed a hand on Ryuji's forearm. Shiho turned to Mishima and asked, "Why?"

"There is something I need to admit, and maybe that will shed light on why I thought I had to do what I did," Mishima said, his voice trembling. "Shiho-san. Ann-san. You two were Kamoshida's victims, but you weren't his very first one….I was."

Ren narrowed his eyes.

"When he first came to Shujin, I thought he was very handsome and kind. He made me feel like I could trust him, and after revealing to my former best friend my secret, I was all alone," Mishima murmured. "I trusted Kamoshida enough to reveal that I was….gay."

The group stared at Mishima with surprise as his eyes glistened with tears. "He quickly changed then. He blackmailed me, abused me….used me in every way he could imagine. And I had to hide it all."

"Oh, Mishima," Ann whispered sadly.

"Because of my secret, Kamoshida made me do so much. He made me plant false evidence to frame the Track Team Coach; I gave Kamoshida the ammo he needed to break down Ryuji, I leaked Ren's records. All because I was too weak to stand for myself. It wasn't until the day you were attacked, Shiho-san, that I decided to try and stand up for myself. Only to fall again…." Mishima suddenly fell to his knees and lowered his head.

"When you all freed Shujin from him, I was so elated, but I became jealous that I couldn't be as strong as any of you. So I created the Phan-Site, not only to help but to make you all need me, so in the future, I could make the person who betrayed me and set me down the path to Kamoshida pay…But my shadow made me realize that I was becoming Kamoshida…."

Mishima bowed deeply to the group, allowing his forehead to touch the ground as he cried, "I'm so sorry for betraying all of you! I know I don't deserve your forgiveness but please, allow me to earn it. I'll do anything you all want. I'll even die for you all. Just please allow me to try…."

Ren stood up and kneeled before Mishima. He placed his hand on top of Mishima's head and said, "Yūki….I can't speak for the others but knowing that you held all of that deep in you. I apologize that Kamoshida held your sexuality against you. I've already forgiven you for leaking my file. And knowing the pressure and the intense abuse you suffered, I would be no better than Kamoshida to hold it against you."

"Yeah, man!" Ryuji announced as he plopped to the left of Mishima. "Looking at your Persona, you managed to accept the dark shit you had in you and vowed to get stronger. You even saved our asses in there. So what if you're into dudes? You could dress as a girl for all I care. You are you. That's all that matters."

"Yeah, the fact that you were just as abused as us, and managed to stop yourself from betraying us like that, shows me that you have a good heart," Shiho said as she sat beside Ren. "We're with you, Mishima."

"Admittedly," Ann began as she sat on the other side of Mishima's body. "Hearing you plan that out makes me not want to trust you. But, knowing what you went through, it's clear that Kamoshida affected you as much as he affected Shiho and I. I'm not going to turn my back on you. It will take time, but I will learn to trust you, Mishima…."

"And that is where I stand as well," Haru told him. "I may not trust you right now, but knowing that you were able to use your Persona tells me that you're truly honest in wanting to change. And knowing your sexual preference doesn't change anything about you, Mishima-san."

Mishima slowly looked up and stared at the four around him. "R-Really?" Mishima asked.

"You're a Phantom Thief, Yūki," Ren told him with a smile. "We look after our own, no matter how many mistakes they've made."

Despite the heavy tears, Mishima smiled and bowed again. "Thank you all. I will not let you down again…." He whispered.

"I am thou... Thou art I...
Thou hast deepened the vow within the hearts of the Phantom Thieves of Hearts.
Thou shalt have our blessings when thou chooseth to create a Persona of the Judgement Arcana

Captain Blues: So, this chapter is done. It was a pretty heavy one, with Hifumi, Makoto and Haru hearing what they need to do and Mishima taking that first important step. The next chapter will deal with Hifumi and Makoto talking and the mission to start. It was supposed to be this chapter but writers block is not my best friend lol