Despite losing her wand, Megumin did not lose her zest for life. Or ability to get herself into trouble. Thankfully this mostly manifested in her picking a fight with an older Gryffindor girl that evening over who got to sit in the comfiest chair close to the fire, and getting unceremoniously dumped on the floor.
"I am surrounded by foes and rejected on all sides," Megumin huffed, sitting cross legged on the carpet and pouting.
"Get over yourself kiddo," the older girl said with a roll of her eyes. "With what you've been up to you're lucky we don't all ostracize you for losing Gyrffindor 50 points on the first day."
That caused Megumin to perk up. "Being branded an outcast by my peers would be a key part of my development as a hero."
"We're not going to brand you an outcast," Percy the Prefect said, not looking up from his papers. "But picking a fight with Angelina is just foolish, firstie. You know she's one of our chasers, right?"
"Sports are dumb and lame," Megumin huffed, then paused. "Except perhaps quidditch, as it appears serious risk of death is involved and skill at magic is required."
"Hmm, well, don't go ticking off members of the quidditch team then," Percy sighed. "Besides, she's not going to ostracize you."
"What? Why not! It would be an excellent way to develop my character!" Megumin protested.
"It's because you seemed to have given Snape an apoplexy, and I find that highly amusing," Angelina laughed. "You should have seen his face for third year potions! He looked like he was sucking on lemons!"
"Snape the Ape always looks like he's sucking on lemons Angie," Fred laughed, plunking himself down in the chair with Angelina. She shoved him out, but didn't look all that put off about it.
"But he did look right peeved," George agreed, taking a seat himself. "Did you really try to off our brother?"
Percy looked up at that, frowning. "What? I didn't hear about that! McGonagall just told me to keep an eye on her."
"She tried to turn Ickle Ronnikins to smoke," Fred supplied. "And take his head off with a desk."
"What!?" Percy dropped his homework and glared at Megumin. "Now listen here. Embarrassing Snape is one thing, though as a prefect I have to say that I disapprove of harassing the professors, but you don't mess with other Gryffindors, and especially not my baby brother!"
"Oh give it a rest Percival," Ron sighed, coming in to sit as far away from Megumin as he possibly could in the common room. "She wasn't trying to kill me in particular."
"I wasn't trying to kill anyone," Megumin grumbled.
"Sure didn't look that way. Don't you know you're not supposed to just make up spells?" Ron demanded.
"If I was trying to kill you I would have made a far more direct effort. What a Crimson Demon seeks to kill dies," Megumin sniffed.
"She's barmy," Ron told Percy. "Brewed up this weird potion that turned our clothes to smoke and-"
"Wait, you ruined your clothes?! You know we can't just go buy you new ones!" Percy wailed.
Ron winced, but Megumin spoke up. "It is true, I did destroy his robes. Ron valiantly saved my life, however, and as such I'll buy him a new set of robes."
"Wait, really?" Ron asked, even inching a bit closer to Megumin. "Not hand me downs, right?"
"No, I have decided that you are suitably heroic and decent sidekick material. As such, I will replace the robes that were destroyed in our lab experiment," Megumin said loftily.
"You don't have to do that, we don't need charity," Percy huffed.
"Shut up, Percy. It's not charity. She bloody well nearly killed me. I call this my just reward. Though I'm not sold on being anyone's sidekick," Ron said.
"Wait, Ron's your sidekick?" Hermoine demanded from her own place of study. "Then what are Darkness and I?"
"Boon companions," Megumin declared. "Ron is a smelly boy and as such has to be the comic relief."
"If you think I'm a bloody joke then you'd best look in the mirror for the best punchline ever," Ron muttered.
"Well regardless, it's time for your detention," Percy said, standing and glaring down at Megumin. "Come on. I have to escort you to the dungeons."
"Will I be tortured? Forced to endure the vilest of torments at the hand of foul monsters?" Megumin considered this. "If that is the case I shall have to heroically escape, as torture seems a bit much."
"We could go with you and help?" Darkness offered, sounding rather uncertain of herself.
"No, she's going to go help clean cauldrons for Snape. The only torture is hard labor and I frankly think it will do her some good," Percy said. "Now come along, we don't want you to get something worse to do."
"Going to the dungeons is much lamer when it's just your classroom," Megumin complained as they descended through the castle. "I was just here yesterday."
"Well you're lucky they didn't just kick you out. And are you really buying Ron new robes?" Percy asked suspiciously.
"As a hero, it is my duty to provide recompense for my various companions on my quest for infamy. Of course, I will also receive the lion's share of rewards when our inevitable victory occurs."
"You are barmy. Just...look. Ron's a good kid but he's never had anything new. Don't try to buy his loyalty."
"I understand, I was forever given hand me downs and used goods when I was a child," Megumin explained. "My cruel aunt and uncle only gave me the castoffs of my cousin, Yunyun, who spitefully kept me locked in a cupboard and used the second bedroom to store her worldly goods while sequestering me in a cupboard under the stairs."
"That's n-not true!" a suit of armor stammered. "Y-you locked yourself in there a-and called it your sanctum! I-I would have let you have the bigger bedroom!"
"Are you stalking me?!" Megumin demanded, whirling on the armor. "This is an outrage!"
"Um, well, I...I just wanted to see if you were alright…" Yunyun said, timidly coming out of where she had been stalking Megumin from.
"Frankly, between the two of you she seems a lot more trustworthy," Percy told Megumin. He turned to Yunyun with a sigh. "Look, I'm just taking Megs to her-"
"Do not call me that," Megumin snapped. "I hate being called Megs! It's a common name for someone with no passion for glory, unlike Megumin which is a unique name for one chosen by destiny!"
Percy regarded Megumin, her nostrils flaring and face flushed in outrage. He sighed heavily. "I don't have time for this. Come along, I don't want to get my head snapped off because you were late. Have a good evening, Yunyun."
"W-wait! I-I want to come too!" Yunyun said desperately.
"You want to go have a detention in the dungeons. With Snape. Cleaning God only knows what out of cauldrons. By hand."
"Um…" Yunyun blushed and nodded.
"No. Go back to your dorms and do homework or something," Percy ordered.
"B-but I already did my homework…"
"Then talk to the other Hufflepuffs. Or take a nap. I don't care," Percy said over his shoulder as he escorted Megumin away.
Yunyun was left looking very disappointed about not being allowed to go scrub cauldrons, while Megumin looked very disappointed that she was going to have to go scrub cauldrons.
"Mad, the lot of you," Percy grumbled.
At the dungeons, Percy handed over his charge to Snape, who was sitting at his desk in the dark room, the only illumination a few guttering candles.
"Ooo, excellent atmosphere," Megumin said approvingly as Percy hastened away before the impending disaster could unfold. "Definitely gives off excellent evil lair vibes. I give it 100 points!"
"Evil lair vibes. Do you really wish to have detention for the rest of your academic career, Miss Potter?" Snape demanded in acid tones.
"That depends on how interesting my detention is," Megumin said. "Are you going to force me to copy ancient tomes of alchemical formulas? Will I be forced to battle against horrible beasts to gather rare ingredients, or perhaps-"
"You will be scrubbing those cauldrons there," Snape said, gesturing to a pile of grimy and smelly pots. "The soap and water is there. I will be inspecting the cauldrons when you have finished, or you will do it again. Do you understand?"
"This is neither compelling nor interesting," Megumin complained. When Snape's lips thinned into near disappearance, she hastily added, "But I accept my punishment as due and just and thank you for your forbearance in not expelling me and allowing me to continue under your excellent if morally dubious tutelage."
Snape closed his eyes, as if counting. Megumin hastily rolled up the sleeves of her robes and set about cleaning the cauldrons.
About halfway into the second cauldron, Megumin poked her head up to see what Snape was doing. She was hoping he would either be brewing an interesting potion or engaging in some diabolical scheme, but instead he appeared to be holding up various vials of potions and examining them before making a notation on a roll of parchment.
"Are you looking to see which potions are the most valuable to sell them, thereby enriching yourself from the labor of your students in a scheme to make yourself wealthy enough to enact your master plan?"
Snape paused in his examination of a rust red vial, turning to give Megumin a withering look. "Is that what it looks like I am doing, Miss Potter?"
"Well, it could be," Megumin hedged. When Snape continued to give her a level look, she sighed. "It may also look like you are grading people's potions."
"You are correct. Get back to work."
After two more cauldrons, Megumin poked her head up. She opened her mouth, but despite not glancing in her direction, Snape spoke first.
"Miss Potter, normally during detentions students are silent, and engage in their labors to reflect upon their misdeeds. This is not a social visit."
"Hmph." Megumin ducked her head down and muttered to herself as she worked. A moment later though, she heard a heavy sigh.
"What were you going to ask, Miss Potter? I suppose you believe that I am collecting potions to overthrow the headmaster and take over the school."
"I KNEW IT! You really are a diabolical villain trying to become-" Megumin cut herself off as she caught the scathing look Snape was giving her. "Um, no, actually. I was going to ask how you grade the potions. You're not testing them. How can you tell if they're going to work properly?"
Snape regarded her for a moment. "If you had bothered to read your text book, you would know-"
"I know that potions are supposed to have subtle shades and hues when brewed properly, but you're just looking at the vials, not opening them to test for smoke or check the smell or anything. And what if the brewer made a potion that looks rubbish but actually performs well because they attempted a new wrinkle on the formula that is superior to the original version? Or what if they enchanted their vial to look the way it should but-"
"These are the potions of second year students," Snape interrupted. "They have made a very simple blood restorative potion. As I have seen more blood restorative potions than I care to count, I can tell if one is up to standard with a mere glance," Snape said acidly.
"Well how?" Megumin asked, completely forgetting what she was supposed to be doing and hurrying up to Snape's desk. "And how does the potion work, exactly? The text books explain how to make the potion and what they do but they don't explain the underlying principles of how potions work. Is it just an arbitrary recipe? I don't think it is. Because for example I noticed that both a fire protection potion and a fire breathing potion use salamander blood, and when I looked up salamanders in the bestiary they are related to the element of fire so I suppose they have some magical properties that makes their blood good for potions relating to fire. But then some potions use what seem to be entirely mundane ingredients like porcupine quills and I don't think those really have magical properties so there has to be more to it than that and I want to know what is is so the next time I make a potion I can do so properly."
Megumin was now right beside Snape standing only a bare inch from his elbow and grinning at him with unabashed enthusiasm, her eyes glowing even more brightly than the candles that lit the room. Snape was leaning back slightly, a look of pure shock on his face. He blinked twice when Megumin wound down, then sneered and leaned forward.
"You expect me to believe you have even the slightest interest in potion making, when you cannot even brew the most basic of potions?" Snape demanded.
"Oh come on!" Megumin threw up her hands in exasperation. "I could have brewed a boil removing potion with nothing but the ingredients! The Potion of Gaseous Form-"
"Elixir of Vaporous Body," Snape corrected.
"-was an advanced potion! And I nearly got it right too!" Megumin glared at Snape. "I don't even understand what I did wrong! I followed all the directions exactly!"
"How do you even know that? You didn't even have the book with you," Snape demanded.
"Well, I mean, I read it about ten times because it was super interesting so I DEFINITELY have the instructions memorized!" Megumin glared at Snape. "You're the teacher! You tell ME what I did wrong!"
"Very well." Snape stood, looming over Megumin, drawing his robes about himself. "Your primary error was that you attempted to brew an advanced NEWT level potion without having the slightest experience with the practical side of potion making."
"But I-"
"Your secondary mistake was that you did not bother to stop and consider that I might, in fact, know how to properly evaluate a potion. Your rash action was what resulted in your receiving this detention. I would never forgive myself if Lily's daughter died in my own classroom."
For a moment, Megumin just glared up at Snape as he sneered at her. Then, she cocked her head to one side. "Wait, did you know my parents?"
"That is immaterial to the subject at hand. Which is you returning to finish cleaning those cauldrons," Snape snapped.
"But you know about my parents!" Megumin grabbed Snape's robes, a pleading look entering her eye. "You have to tell me about them! Why did Voldemor-"
"DO NOT USE THE DARK LORD'S NAME!" Snape roared, grabbing Megumin's mouth and pinching her jaw shut. He took a deep breath, but rage boiled from his every pore. "That name is not one you should utter lightly, Potter. I will not see you go to the same fate your...that others have through sheer recklessness and stupidity."
Megumin tried to speak, but Snape raised a finger. "I will make you a deal, Potter. Are you listening? Do not speak. Nod if you understand."
Megumin nodded.
"Thus far you have only shown yourself to be an impertinent child incapable of following even the simplest of directions. If you wish to know anything of your parents from me, you will go and clean the rest of those cauldrons. In silence. Do you understand?"
Despite an ominous glow from her eyes, Megumin nodded.
"Good. Get to it. I have work to do."
Snape returned to grading the potions, and Megumin went back to scrubbing the cauldrons. It took her well over an hour and a half of cleaning, but she was rather experienced at cleaning and doing chores. Mostly because of how often she was given extra work for some misbehavior or other.
At last, filthy and covered in grease and soapy residue, Megumin planted herself in front of Snape. He looked up, eyeing the cauldrons. "Hmph. I suppose that will do. Sit down, Potter."
After Megumin sat, Snape straightened in his chair, and steepled his hands together, leaning down slightly to study Megumin. "I knew your mother. We grew up together as children."
"What was she like?!" Megumin demanded. "Aunt Petunia talked about her sometimes but she-"
"If you interrupt me again, my tale is ended," Snape stated flatly.
Megumin's jaw snapped shut, though she was practically vibrating in her seat with eagerness.
"Your mother was...passionate. Much as you are." Snape sighed, rubbing his forehead with one hand. "And as prone to flights of fancy and recklessness. A brilliant mind, as you seem to possess. But...well. We had our differences."
Even at that, Megumin managed not to speak, though she made a vague hissing noise like a kettle about to boil. Sighing, Snape raised his finger. "One question."
"AreyousecretlymymothersloverwhosheabandonedwhenyourevealedthatyouweresecretlyanevilmonsterservigntheDarkLordHeWhoMustNotBeNamedandfoughtaclimacticduelwithmyfatherforherhandthatleftyoueternallyscarred?"
Snape blinked a few times at Megumin as she panted and he tried to unravel what she'd just asked. "We were childhood friends. As for your father...that is not something I will speak of tonight. I will only say this: your mother was dear to me. And I will not allow her daughter to become a casualty of her own lack of self control."
Megumin blinked, then frowned. She tapped her foot, obviously waiting for Snape to continue.
"I have said my piece for the night. If you wish to actually learn, I suggest you start by studying how to properly brew a simple Herbicide Potion for our class next week."
"But that one's easy! The Magical Drafts and Potions book says it's suitable for beginners!" Megumin protested despite herself.
Snape leaned forward, his tone cold. "Then, I would expect the foremost genius of the Crimson Demon Clan would be able to brew an exemplary one."
"Fine! I'll brew the best Herbicide Potion you've ever seen!" Megumin snapped. Then she hesitated. "If I do...will you tell me more about my mom? I...I want to know what she was like…"
"If you can manage to participate in both our class tomorrow and that one without incident, I will consider it," Snape growled. "Now. Begone."
"Hmph." Megumin flounced out of the dungeon, though she paused in the hallway. "Um, hello Annita. Why are you here?"
"To see to it you come straight back to the dorms without causing trouble." Annita poked her head into the dungeon. "Well, it looks like nothing's wrong. I'll just take her back now, Professor."
"See that you do. Perhaps you are capable of such a simple task, unlike that disaster you claimed was a Draught of Peace," Snape rejoined.
"Yes sir!" Annitta said cheerily, then ushered Megumin away. When they turned the corner, she muttered, "Prick. Well, he didn't abuse you too badly, did he?"
"I was forced to engage in harsh labor, nearly passing out from the various fumes, all the while grilled on the most intimate secrets of-"
"Yeah you're fine," Annitta chuckled. "Best watch yourself, Firstie. Snape doesn't have any time for clowning around. McGonagall is strict but she has a sense of humor. I think Snape brewed up a potion to remove his."
"Hmph. Well, I think Snape has a proper appreciation for drama. I'll show him. My Gaseous Form Potion was nearly perfect!" Megumin ranted.
"Just don't get creative. Hey, you're feeling alright, aren't you?" Annitta asked suspiciously.
"I have an iron constitution!"
"That's not what Percy's robes think. I almost died laughing when you sicked up on him. Snape could use some humility though. Don't tell him I said that. He's an alright sort when he's not got a stick up his arse. Now come on. You reek. Get a shower then go to bed."
"Hmph. I am imprisoned in this school, with you as my warden. No freedom allowed," Megumin complained.
"Well prove you can go more than 24 hours without causing a disaster and maybe I won't have to walk all over this castle just to make sure you don't try and go bungee jumping off the astronomy tower or whatever madness gets into your head."
"Don't be dumb. Bungee jumping is stupid. However, if I could figure out how to create a jetpack with the right levitation charms…"
Whistling to himself, Hagrid ambled along the corridor of Hogwarts Castle on a sweep for stray students. It was only the third night, but a sweep for very lost first years was necessary. One year a poor boy had managed to get so lost that he was stranded in an out of the way series of rooms for two days before he was found.
He was just about to finish his patrol and head home for the evening when he heard the faint sound of crying. Sighing, Hagrid turned down a rarely used passage. "Anyone in there? If that's you Peeves, I'll set the Baron on you I swear."
"M-Mr. Hagrid?"
"Ah, Yunyun? What are yeh doin' in here? It's past curfew yeh know," Hagrid said, kneeling beside an alcove where the young girl was huddled up.
"I-I was waiting f-for M-megumin to come back from her d-detention. I just...I…" Yunyun started crying again, and Hagrid sighed.
"Come on, this ain't no place to be spendin' the night. Come with old Hagrid, why dontcha?" Hagrid helped Yunyun up, then walked her down to the kitchens. She watched wide eyed as a house elf brought her some tea and biscuits.
"Um, t-thank you."
"Nipsy is being happy to help mistress. Yous will be feeling better soon, Nipsy knows it. Lots of firsties is missing their parents. Will be alright. Hogwarts is a wonderful place, mistress will see."
"Um, I-I'm not a mistress. M-my name is Y-yunyun." Yunyun managed a timid smile. "W-we could be f-friends…"
"Oh! Nipsy would be so very happy to be mistress's friend. Miss Yunyun is welcome to be coming to the kitchens for snacks any time! We elves is always happy to be giving extra snacks."
"Yer not supposed teh tell the students that, Nips," Hagrid said, though his voice lacked any reproof. "Eat themselves sick, some of them would."
"Nipsy can tell Mistress Yunyun isn't like that, now is she? Mistress is a good girl, right?'
Yunyun nodded quickly.
"Good, good. Well, Nipsy has chores to do, but snap if you need anything Master Hagrid." Then the strange creature snapped her own fingers, and vanished in a puff of smoke.
"I-I guess I-I made a friend after all," Yunyun sniffled.
"Yeh can't tell me that they're being mean to yeh in Hufflepuff. Professor Sprout nor the older students wouldn't stand fer it," Hagrid said as Yunyun sipped at her tea.
"N-no, I just...I...I get nervous," Yunyun admitted. "And, um, well. I...I don't…"
Yunyun started crying again, and it wasn't until she had dried her face with Hagrid's somewhat stained hankie that she managed to continue. "I-I've never been away from Megumin, a-and I'm worried. S-she got into trouble again, and she got hurt, and I won't let my friend get hurt! If it's someone being mean, I'll make them stop! But...but Megumin has to still be my friend, right? She's my best friend!"
Hagrid studied Yunyun for a moment, then sighed. "Bit of a tift between the two o' yeh, is there?'
"Um, a little…"
"Well, I got the solution to that. Tell yeh whant. You like unicorns? Coarse yeh do. All little girls like unicorns. Well, Megs has got a detention with me a couple nights from now. Maybe yeh can tag along. Maybe work things out. I'll talk with Professor Sprout. We can say it's cause yeh were out late without permission, see?"
"Um, OK. T-thank you, Mr. Hagrid."
"It's just Hagrid, Yunyun."
And for at least a little while, Yunyun felt like she had at least one friend left in the world.