A/N: Hey! Hope ya'll are well! I am very pleased with the comments I got about the potential one shot series focusing on this story. I probably won't start posting that until after I finish or get close to finishing this. I'm still not completely sure how many chapters this will have, but I do have a lot planned. Also, if there are ever any time jumps between chapters (like this one), I will fill in bits of those with the one shots. Anyways, thank you and I hope you enjoy!

...

Street wasn't completely sure what to expect as he and JJ walked through the door of their shared apartment. It had been three weeks since JJ had been found and taken to the hospital… but her recovery was long from over.

Physically, she was progressing. She still had a lot of healing to do, as her body had faced a great deal of trauma, but the doctor assured that she was well on the road to making a full recovery.

Street was so grateful for that, as there were many times over the course of the last few weeks where he thought he had lost her. It was amazing to know that she would eventually be okay… but it wasn't the physical aspect in which she was struggling. It was emotionally, and Street had no idea how to help her.

JJ hadn't been the same since she heard about the baby… and honestly, neither had he. Nothing could have prepared them for that news, and being the one to have to tell JJ was the hardest thing he had ever done.

JJ had been quiet since then, not ever saying more than what she had to. In the hospital, she answered the doctor's questions, though would try to get by with only one or two word answers. She barely even spoke to Street or the team. It was as if she was in her own world, and everything else was blocked out.

Street knew that was her coping mechanism, and that he shouldn't be surprised because he was used to her closing herself off when she was working through something… but still, it hurt him to see her like that… and he wasn't sure what to do.

How could he help her through her grief when he wasn't even sure how to manage his own? He looked over at her as she stood in the living room of the apartment. Her arm was no longer in a sling, but her ribs had been wrapped before leaving the hospital, and a dressing put over her stitches from the surgery. She was also walking with a crutch in order to keep her weight off of her leg as it healed.

What really caught his attention, however, was the bruises that were still visible on her features, and the empty look in her eyes that had been there since he broke the news to her at the hospital.

Her reaction was still seared into his brain and that conversation would stick with him forever.

…

3 WEEKS EARLIER

The ticking of the clock on the wall was really starting to get on Street's nerves. It wasn't the actual sound that was the problem… rather it was the constant reminder of how much time had passed without JJ waking up ever since he first saw her nearly lifeless body in that warehouse.

He had finally been let back into JJ's room. Oddly enough, it was Hotch that had spoken to the doctor, explaining why Street had went off on him, and that it would be best for everyone to let him back in the room. Hotch assured that he himself would stay out so that no further issues would be caused.

Street was grateful to him for that, but he still couldn't bring himself to apologize to the agent for his outburst. All he cared about was staying with JJ, and making sure she knew she was safe.

Despite the aggravating clock on the wall, Street lost track of how long he had been sitting there. He was constantly replaying the past twenty-four hours over and over again in his mind… knowing that all of this could have been prevented.

It didn't have to come to this. Hotch could have prevented it… JJ could have prevented it. That thought hit Street like a tidal wave as he hadn't really considered it before. He knew it was true though, as JJ could have chose to stay at the BAU. She didn't have to go with the team that night, but she made the decision anyway.

The all too familiar feeling of burning anger started coursing through his veins again… and he wasn't completely sure who it was directed towards. Hotch still? JJ, now that he had more time to comprehend everything? …Or was it himself for even thinking this way at all? Maybe it was just anger in general because this was happening to him and JJ and he had no explanation as to why.

…

Street sat there for hours. Hours of tears, hours of questions, hours of willing and praying that JJ would open her eyes. Hours turned into the rest of the day, and it was almost nightfall when she finally started showing signs of waking up.

Street was talking to her, as he had taken up doing every so often so she would know he was there, when he felt a small movement. He had been holding onto her hand, and he could've swore he felt her squeeze his. "JJ?"

After a few moments of nothing he began to think it was all in his head… that he had imagined it because he wanted so bad for it to happen. He sighed, the small bit of hope he had quickly fading away.

He looked at the blonde one more time, then laid his head to rest on the bed beside of her hip. He closed his eyes, exhaustion overtaking him. It had been well over 60 hours since he had slept, and his body was starting to feel it.

He began to drift off, the adrenaline of the past three days now long gone.

…

He wasn't sure how long exactly he had been asleep, but it couldn't have been more than a few minutes when he felt it again… that same squeeze on his hand. Sure he had been dreaming, Street was tempted to ignore it… but then he finally heard her.

Street quickly sat up as he heard JJ groan beside of him. "Jay?" He watched as her eyelids fluttered and her face contorted into a grimace. "JJ, it's okay. You're safe. I'm right here. C'mon, open your eyes, honey. Please."

It took a few moments, but finally she managed to open her eyes, and Street felt like crying out of pure relief.

"St-Street?" She hadn't quite focused on him yet, and he wasn't sure if she really even knew where she was.

"Yeah, baby. I'm here." He gripped her hand a little tighter.

She groaned again, and Street could tell she was in pain.

"I'll get the doctor."

"Wait. Wh-What happened?"

The doctor said she had a pretty bad concussion. Street thought that would probably explain the confusion. "What's the last thing you remember?"

JJ closed her eyes, still holding onto Street's hand. When she spoke, her voice was weak and she sounded groggy. "Uh… Reid, getting him out of prison.. No, that's not right. An accident, there was an accident." Her eyes shot open. "The baby. Is the baby okay? What about the team?"

Street wasn't sure how to proceed. This would crush her, and he didn't want to be the one to do it, but he knew he had to. Still, maybe he could stall, give himself time to figure out what to say. "Let me get the doctor to check you out. Then I'll tell you everything, okay?" His voice cracked a bit, as he was unable to choke down his emotion.

He could see the panic in her eyes as everything started to come back to her. "No, you've got to tell me."

He closed his own eyes for a brief moment, dread washing over him. "There was a wreck, but it was orchestrated by Scratch. Um, Stephen… Stephen didn't make it."

"No," she breathed out as her eyes filled with tears.

"I'm sorry." He gave her a minute to process that, but knew she had to hear the rest. "Everyone else is okay. Rossi had to go through surgery, but he's going to be fine." Street moved closer to her, bracing himself for what had to come next. "JJ, do remember what happened after the wreck?"

Her eyes took on a haunted, faraway look, as if she was back in a particular horrifying memory. She slowly nodded. "Scratch." She locked her gaze on Street again. "Our baby? Jim, tell me our baby is okay." Her voice was desperate, pleading… but the look on her features suggested she already knew what he was about to say.

Street couldn't hold it together any longer. Tears began to blur his vision and he choked a bit as he tried, and failed, to get the words out.

"Please… no. No!" Her face drained of all color and tears were now pouring down her cheeks. She let out a heart wrenching sob as her heart monitor began to beep incessantly.

Street watched helplessly as the doctor and his nurses rushed in.

"What happened?!" One of the nurses demanded.

"Um, she woke up a few minutes ago and asked about the baby. I had to tell her what happened." His own tears couldn't be held at bay as he watched JJ's distress, and he fought as the nurses tried to push him out of the room yet again. "No, please! You have to let me stay with her. I need to stay with her!"

The doctor immediately administered a sedative to JJ. Before it had the desired effect, JJ seemed to panic even more as she realized they were forcing Street out.

The doctor directed his gaze towards the nurse. "He can stay."

Street immediately retook his spot by the bed, grabbing JJ's hand once again. "I'm right here."

Her eyes closed, her body going slack as she drifted off.

Street brought JJ's hand up to his lips, giving her a soft kiss before mumbling, "We'll get through this. We have to get through this."

…

PRESENT

JJ remembered every bit of that conversation as if she was still in the moment. She didn't know how considering the trauma and medication her body had been subjected to at the time… but the look on Street's face still haunted her.

Now, standing in the middle of their living room, she was replaying it all in her mind like watching a bad movie… one where you know how it's going to end, but still can't bring yourself to except it.

While she remembered everything about that moment, she didn't, however, remember everything that happened to her at the hands of Scratch. Whether it was due to his drugs or just the fact that her mind was trying to protect her, she had no idea… but the not knowing was really starting to get to her.

She profiled the human brain and behavior for a living, so she understood how some traumatic events were blocked from memory while others were as crystal clear as a photograph… but none of that knowledge was useful when it was happening to her.

She had been through it before though… with her abduction by Hastings and Askari, with her time in Afghanistan… with her miscarriage then. She couldn't believe this was happening again. She had lost another baby… and it was her fault.

Why had she ever made the choice to get in the SUV that night? If she hadn't have, her baby would still be alive… and maybe so would Stephen. Maybe he would have been in that SUV instead, and wouldn't have taken so much of the impact.

Her mind was spinning, and suddenly she wasn't sure what to do next. Truthfully, she didn't even know what to say to Street. She could tell a part of him blamed her for what happened.

He had been supportive throughout the past three weeks of her recovery, but something was different between them. There was a lot of tension, and JJ knew that was probably her fault too. She hadn't spoken much to him, hadn't accepted the help that he constantly offered… instead it was almost as if she was pushing him away.

Neither of them needed that. They needed to be leaning on each other throughout this, but JJ couldn't help it. Shutting down was how she dealt with things, and this time was no exception. Anyways, why should she accept any form of help from him when she got them into this mess to begin with? It wasn't like she was exactly offering him any comfort. He blamed her, yet was still doing anything he could to ensure she was okay… and she was offering nothing in return.

She wanted to be there for Street, she really did… but she had no idea how to be. She was struggling with her own emotions, with her own grief. She couldn't understand it… none of it. Why was this happening to her again? Why had she let this happen again?

If she would have just stayed at the BAU…

JJ felt sick. "I'm going to lie down." She didn't meet Street's eyes, not able to bare the look of sorrow that had been etched onto his features since the hospital.

"Do you need any help?"

"No, I'm fine." Stubbornly, she ignored the pain that was shooting through every part of her body, and used her crutch to make her way into the bedroom. Once she was settled atop of the bed, she wrapped her arms around her midsection and sobbed.

…

Street, for his part, watched helplessly as JJ denied any assistance and retreated to the bedroom. He felt stuck, not knowing what to do or say. This was the first time that he had ever felt uncomfortable being in the same room as the blonde.

He couldn't deny that a part of him did still blame JJ. He didn't want to, but how could he not? He hated feeling like that, especially seeing the grief and guilt that she was feeling herself… he just didn't know how to stop it.

JJ shouldn't have made the choice she did, it was that plain and simple. Realistically, he knew that she couldn't have predicted what was going to happen, just like Hotch couldn't have… but still, she knew what kind of man they were up against, and the lengths he would go to.

Street felt so guilty for thinking what he was. He was so grateful that she was alive and home with him, but the other feelings he was harboring didn't seem to be going away right now.

He sank down on the couch, closing his eyes as he felt a mix of emotions that he wasn't sure how to sort through. The grief, the anger, the relief… it was overwhelming.

Never in his life had he wished to turn back the clock as much as he did now… never had he felt so helpless.