"Oh! I was about to comment on the fisticuffs transpiring in the center of the Cube but that show of golden brilliance distracted me!"

"That's right, Moegi, that's Dhaogu from Team Zumurrud, a Sunagakure ninja. He would seem like a traditional Sabaku clansman, if you just paid attention to the gourd on his back but his sand is actually hanging around in golden-colored oil making it a lot thicker and weightier."

"Not to mention that he's a real stand-up guy too. We've had a chat a few days ago and he made me laugh plenty of times!"

"I'm not sure how that's relevant, Konohamaru…"

"It's relevant because my boy hit that chubby girl straight in the face with his oily sand and smashed her against the wall! Boy, I can't see how she's not out from that!"

"You're right, it doesn't even seem like Dhaogu is done yet too, his liquid golden sands are rushing at that Otogakure team. If that lady doesn't move out of the way, she'll meet the same fate as that chubby from Sunagakure!"

"Actually, Shiore is a man, Konohamaru, and the young lady that got eliminated before was Tiwul."

"Oh well, I leave all that stuff to you, at this point…"

"You're smiling as if that's something to be proud of, Konohamaru!"

"Maybe it is to me, Moegi!"

"Oh no! Shiore did not evade the oily sands, I guess their movements were just too unpredictable. Now, what do you guys think the benefits of the oily sands are? How is evading oily, golden sands different from normal sand?"

"Oh, I've no idea…"

"I mean… It does look heavier so it must pack a much bigger wallop."

"You're right Moegi, it seems like it does, plus, it doesn't seem like it wastes any of the fluidity of sand manipulation of the Sabaku clan either. What an innovative ability indeed and it has led so far to two examinees being eliminated."

"Uh-oh, look at that!"

"Whoa! Konoharamu, nice spot! There seems to be a giant mass of golden sands accumulating in the air. The entire Black Cube is sunken in shadows due to being enclosed with the only light being that which the Demonic Trilimbo seal spreads so the shadow of the hanging mass might be difficult to spot from down there in all the chaos."

"Hot damn!"

"Hot damn is right, Moegi, that whole mass came crashing down! Dhaogu's on fire, I guess since Big Bro Naruto's out of it, he's my new favorite to win the whole thing!"

"Would you repeat that, Konohamaru?"

"D-Don't even…"

"What's wrong? Didn't see that coming?"

"To our viewers and those listening back home, be they just in our imagination, a cocoon of ruby burst forth from the golden mass surrounded in flames and Tolkre Guren, that ruthless, arrogant and very opinionated snake, encased contestant Dhaogu in crystal as well and he's out!"

"And just look at that, with a clap of his hands, Tolkre Guren from Iwagakure has sent a shower of ruby shards at those around him still working to burrow their way out of the oily sand!"

"That's not it, Moegi, you see, Tolkre Guren has a hidden ability to each of his different Crystal Release types."

"Different types of crystal?"

"That's right, Konohamaru, Tolkre Guren is capable of transforming his Crystal Release into different sorts of crystals, making his ability more of a Gemstone Release, if you will. Each different gemstone has a frightening effect of its own, for example, as we've seen, Tolkre's Ruby Release can set things ablaze!"

"B-But…"

"That's right Moegi, Tolkre Guren is currently showering the entirety of the oily field in his Ruby Shard Shower, which means that everything's gonna go up in flames…"

"I've never seen anyone comment on things going up in flames with such indifference, Udon, could you put some more oomph into your commentary maybe? The audience will need a necromancer soon unless you bring your game up to our level…"

"Up to our level? You are aware he's the only one doing some actual commentary here, are you, Konohamaru?"

"Whoa! Everything's lit up! Fire and yelling everywhere! Total mayhem!"

"Don't you divert the topic, Konohamaru!"

"Actually, we'd better divert the topic at this time, Moegi, because the staff seems to be removing examinees Burami, Kotaro, Minato, Murakari Toro, and Muyami."

"Ouch! That's a lot of eliminations all at once!"

"That's right, Moegi, but you should be thankful that Tolkre Guren, that dastardly snake, has eliminated Burami, trust me, you don't want to know his fighting style. I had indigestion yesterday after reading his Ninja Info Card…"

"Oh, you mean the flappy fatso guy that bodyslams with his fat frame and throws his sweat at people?"

"Goddamn it, Konohamaru!"

"Ouch, stop pulling on my hair, Moegi!"

"Never an eye away from the action, folks, examinee Tolkre Guren seems to have felt the scent of blood in the water and now he's gunning after everybody. That might not be the best strategy for survival as there are currently still around a hundred and thirty-two examinees present, meaning that he'll likely juice out before making a dent in those numbers all by himself."

"Uh-oh, he met that white-haired boy and the two hit head-to-head, what's going on?"

"That young man is Horein Ptet from Iwagakure's Team Pyrite, seeing how the two are from the same village, he must know all about Tolkre Guren's abilities and he intends on stopping them?"

"How would you even do that? I mean the moment this Tolkre guy feels like it, he can just turn you to crystal anyway…"

"Not quite, Horein Ptet is an amazing taijutsu specialist, which is why he's rushed up so close to Tolkre and locked his wrists."

"So?"

"If I had to guess, Moegi, I'd say that Tolkre Guren needs to clap his hands together to execute his better Crystal Release abilities which Horein Ptet is preventing by holding his wrists far away from one another, securing them with his superior physical strength."

"Ooh! That looked like it hurt! Horein swung his fellow Iwagakure ninja around and slammed him into the ground, then kicking him right in the chest like a goddamn horse! What a flight, Tolkre Guren is down and out!"

"Why would Horein attack somebody from his own village though? Aren't there over a hundred of other potential targets?"

"It is tough to say for certain, if I had to guess though, these two either really don't like each other or Horein considered Tolkre to be too much of a threat, regardless of his affiliation, to leave unchecked after so many consecutive eliminations."

"That's right, I guess that Tolkre guy did eliminate near to ten examinees, didn't he?"

"That's right, Konohamaru, there seems to be a common tendency here, a lesson to learn, if you will, and that's – don't stand out until the right moment."

"Whoa! Is that a hammer made out of solid bone!?"

"It might be, that examinee if Jekleifer Kaguya, from what I've come to learn during my research – he was a bigtime superstar during the last Chuunin Exams held in Konoha so it's tough to imagine why he hadn't been promoted."

"Whoa! Rock Lee took that massive bone hammer head-on, the thing must be at least a dozen times his size!"

"That's right, Moegi, and, judging by the swollen skin, the whited-out eyes and the vapor coming out from Rock Lee, he seems to require all of his latent power to hold that platform of smashing, living bone but…"

"Damn!"

"Damn is right, not even Rock Lee could hold that Jekleifer Kaguya guy at bay, what a pity…"

"And look at that, examinee Choroina Akimichi had noticed Jekleifer's investment into his clash with Rock Lee and she's moved in for the easy elimination."

"Ewww! That Jekleifer guy's kinda hot but those bones everywhere are a real turnoff!"

"Well, that's the extremely rare mutation – the Shikotsumyaku at play. With bones skewering Choroina's body from Jekleifer's behind, it is revealed that the Kaguya seems to have few to none blindspots to his ability."

"And look at that, Jekleifer is immediately trying to shuffle himself back into the chaos of the Battle Royal, he doesn't want to stand out, having already eliminated multiple examinees in a fraction of a second."

"Fat chance of that happening, that Mamushi guy threw himself in the way! Oooh!"

"That's right, he got a bone spear through the gut for all the trouble but…"

"What's happening with Jekleifer, I don't get it?"

"Examinee Jekleifer has just surrendered… That is odd… I don't get this either, Moegi, maybe it's one of the Yamanaka clan members doing this? It is difficult to say."

"Huh… That Mamushi guy seems awfully happy for a guy that got speared and eliminated, doesn't he?"

"Ah! Nice find, Konohamaru, I've now figured it all out, you see, Mamushi is a member of Team Saya from Sunagakure and his teammate – Saya, has the ability to control people's minds after acquiring a sample of their hair. That was what examinee Mamushi has done this whole time!"

"Hmm… I seem to have seen Saya amongst the hunters of the second stage too."

"That's right, Moegi, she and her teammates were one of the few ninja to have acquired the status of both a hunter and an examinee, meaning that multiple versions of them have been added to the exam's roster."

"Seems like favoritism to me!"

"I don't think so, hunter Saya isn't actually competing anyway, right?"

"Yeah, I guess you're right, Moegi…"

"Oh, what's that guy doing? I've never seen him before… I think I would remember seeing a weirdo like that…"

"Oh, I'm not quite aware of this one either…"

"What!? You don't know somebody, Udon!?"

"Yeah, it's not like you to skim through research haphazardly, that's like… Your one thing. You really need to pull your own weight here, man."

"I don't think that's fair to say at all…"

"Shut up, Moegi!"

"Actually… I don't see examinee Gentib de Vitt anywhere. I suspect that this flashy, red-haired, face-painted kimono spirit we're seeing trailblazing on the stage is one of his personalities."

"Personalities?"

"That's right, Moegi, you see, examinee Gentib is a very talented competitor and he has multiple fighting styles all of which are perfectly functional but they coexist very poorly. For this reason, he has created multiple personalities, gimmicks, if you will, which he can switch between at relative ease. Each personality uses a different set of Gentib's techniques and everything from the personality of that gimmick to its techniques is made to make the perfect version of Gentib for that situation."

"Dude, pay more attention, he's eliminated already…"

"Huh!?"

"Yeah, that cool, black-haired guy with two swords made short work of him after tripping him up with a sweep."

"Ah, that makes sense, examinee Kei-J from Kumogakure is an excellent taijutsu user who might even be able to trade fists with Rock Lee of our own universe without embarrassing himself. Such a person would be able to best Gentib in hand to hand combat."

"Wow, the fisticuffs are really getting wild, aren't they, can you tell anything that's happening?"

"This is crazy, imaginary ladies and gentlemen, there are explosions, raging whirlpools of water and tornadoes rampaging all over the place and Kei-J is just swinging his staff around over his head. Trying to make sense of it all…"

"Aren't we all, right now?"

"Yep, oh, it seems like the staff is interfering, at least five whole ninja and… Examinees Zahafbit, Ino Yamanaka, Bukhande, Kegon, Haltigeir Erblau, Koji from Team Ameno, Lazimo, Kidenshi Inuzuka, Othello-G, and Vespiga Esonig have all left the Black Cube riding the piggyback ride of Konoha ninja straight to elimination."

"It is starting to be difficult for these commenters to keep up with all the action!"

"That's right, though it should be getting easier once the space in the arena frees up a little and more and more examinees are eliminated."

"We'll make sure to keep our audience hooked with snips of the coolest action while we patch you up with the less impressive eliminations too, in the meantime, is anyone else's throat getting dry?"

"Don't tell me you're getting dry throat now, Konohamaru, we're barely even one-third through the event yet. It's barely been forty minutes yet."

"While Konohamaru finds himself something to drink, hopefully, making as little of unnecessary static as possible, we'll patch you in on some of the hottest action, right now Kin Tsuchi from Otogakure is trying to pin Neji Hyuuga with some of her senbon but she just can't get any offense in."

"Well, that's what she should have expected, honestly, it only took one blow from Neji to hit her central tenketsu and shut it down. With that one down, an examinee might find it tough to stay on their feet, which is, sadly, a requirement to not get eliminated here."

"I'd say in life as well, it's a pretty good idea to stay on both feet and fully conscious when people are trying to hurt you."

"That's an excellent advice, I agree, Moegi."

"How do you like that, folks, come for the riveting Battle Royale commentary, stay for the invaluable life advice!"

"Now, if I might direct your attention to examinee Crus Sfintos, he seems to be rushing around the Black Cube, likely looking for someone specifically."

"Now, what could he be looking for, you think, Udon?"

"I'm not very sure, it's not like Crus Sfintos to work alone, he is more of a support-type ninja. He doesn't have very much described techniques and focuses more on the medical abilities, although the Mystical Palm Jutsu isn't on his list of techniques."

"How interesting, so he's a medical ninja, but an unofficial one?"

"Well, he hasn't graduated any courses in the subject, I assume he's self-taught but… What a crude method! Crus Sfintos has jumped up examinee Komugi's back and just stuffed something into his mouth!"

"Ewww! There is foam coming out from Komugi's mouth, I see staff rushing in to withdraw him from further competition, what's known about this Komugi guy? Why did Crus target him?"

"Well, it's difficult to say, frankly, the two are from wholly different universes. Komugi is one of ours."

"Huh!? Is he?"

"Apparently he took the Chuunin Exams a year or so ago. Sadly, he and his team have failed to show off enough of their abilities to obtain their promotion."

"Hmmm… I don't very much remember him."

"Really? He is in the current genin rotation, just like us…"

"Nope…"

"He's in Team Komugi, alongside Gennai and Inaho…"

"Not ringing a bell…"

"Oh, well… Still, it's an enigma why Crus Sfintos would have chosen Komugi for elimination."

"Maybe the guy just had his guard down?"

"That is likely, Komugi is known for getting overconfident from time to time."

"And I'm back! I got us all water bottles!"

"You're not supposed to say that, show some professionalism!"

"Well, while my teammates are brawling and pushing one another, I'll let the audience know that the other Moegi, Kyona Chu, Kushina, Portorigus Claimcloch and Kaimuri Mouza seem to have been eliminated.

"Huh!? The other me got eliminated!? No way! Stop laughing, Konohamaru! How did that happen!?"

"Well, examinee Gasco Patura sent a few crescent Wind Release shockwaves Moegi's way and the landing from her flight was less than graceful, resulting in more than few broken bones, Kyona Chu of Kirigakure fell to the deceptive Magnet Release of Toroi. The other me eliminated examinee Kushina via his Water Release tendrils that seem to pack a decent punch, all things considered, while examinees Portorigus and Mouza have each injured themselves in clashing when Mouza's ax cut through Portorigus' sword and cleaved into his chest but the shard of the sword imbedded into examinee Mouza's head."

"I think you should have tried for a career in commenting, how many times have you failed to graduate from the Ninja Academy?"

"You just had to bring that up…"

"Ummm… While my teammates are feuding… Well… This long, violet hair guy from Sunagakure has called for a trio of sand lions from the leftover oily sand but… Oh, this dark-skinned fellow with a camo cloak had vaulted over the innovative offense and smacked him in the head with… What seems to be a really large branch. Though the impact is amazing, the hit sent the violet-hair-guy straight into elimination with one blow!"

"Why I oughta…"

"Konohamaru! Look at what you have done, you snap Udon out of his sulking this moment, I'm not sure if I can keep this up for long! I don't know any of their names!"

"Ow! Stop pinching me, it's not that hard, for Pete's sake!"

"Oh yeah? I don't hear you doing it!"

"Come on, well… This brown-hair girl with a Sunagakure headband… Ummm… Actually… I think I might have seen her around a few times… She's using her weapon that's a dart attached to a rope and it's whizzing right past the competition. She's showing some break-neck speed and precision with that thing! Uh-oh, this red-haired grouchy from Sunagakure as well has deflected her weapon and… Ouch. Did you guys hear that cracking sound? Her eyes look pale white, she's definitely out!"

"Snap out of it, Udon, snap out of it, please! We can't do this without you!"

"Ignore that background noise… Ummm… Let's see… I'm not sure why that Sunagakure guy has targeted his own ally but…"

"He's from a different universe…"

"Wha…!?"

"He's alive!"

"Tala is a from a different universe, he is a Sunagakure ninja, yes, but he's from a different universe and has a quite strict attitude to boot. For that reason he showed no restrictions to using his Sand Bullet technique to dispatch of examinee Matsuri from Sunagakure."

"Yeah, he's back!"

"Umm… Our cheeks are rubbing, Konohamaru… You're making it awkward…"

"Nevermind that, Udon, we're just glad to see you back, buddy!"

"Ummm… Thanks, I guess… It was just mean what Konohamaru said, I am really conscious about that, you know…"

"Cheer up, ya oaf!"

"Thanks just… Don't smack my back anymore, Moegi, please…"

"Alright! You hear that, ladies and gents in the audience, the Konohamaru Commenter Squad is back together, full power ahead! We'll coast you through this crazy Battle Royal of the third stage in no time at all!"

"You are aware that we can't do it any faster than it is actually taking place, right?"

"In your face, Moegi!"

"Yeah… Real mature…"

"Guys, guys… You're gonna make us miss some eliminations again… Let's just focus on the action."