Chapter 11
Flavia let out a low whistle as she looked around the barracks' cluttered common room, hands perched on her hips and a small grin on her face.
"Nice place you got here," she said. "I thought you said this was just a barracks."
"It is," I said, flopping into my favorite chair. "You can thank my maid for the general cleanliness, and thank the fact that Chrom has no idea what he owns for the nice furniture."
We both glanced up at the sound of approaching footfalls, Gaila and Elle bustling in with trays of drinks and snacks. I was surprised to see Gaila helping out, but she had said she was going on ahead to get things ready, so…
"That explains why the place looks so nice," Gaila laughed.
They both placed their trays down on the low table, and Elle dropped a courtly curtsey to Flavia, who quirked her brows.
"It is a pleasure to meet you, Khan Flavia," she said demurely. "Miss Gaila has informed me you intend to stay here. I will prepare a room for you-"
"She can have mine," I cut in. "I'll crash in Noire's bed or something. Save you making up someone else's room."
"Aw, that's so sweet!" Flavia said.
As she spoke, she lowered herself into the seat in front of me, grinning appreciatively. Gaila brazenly snatched a handful of cookies off the tray on the table as this was happening, earning a glare from Elle in the process.
"We have the space, milord," Elle insisted.
"He's trying to get you outta more work, girl, shut up!" Gaila laughed through a mouthful of cookie.
Elle just huffed and rolled her eyes.
"We'll work something out," I promised her. "Did you get Noire to bed okay?"
"Yes, milord, I put her to bed an hour ago," Elle nodded. "Archer is with her. And Bertha will have dinner ready soon."
"Aw, I was hoping to meet my niece," Flavia chuckled.
"She'll probably be up a few hours after dinner, anyway," I sighed. "She still rarely sleeps through the night. Don't worry."
"Ylissean food, huh?" Flavia grinned. "I hope it's as fancy as the accommodation."
"Yeah, don't get your hopes up," I snorted. "It tastes good, but that's about it."
"Can't be any worse than travel rations," Flavia shrugged. "I swear, if I have to eat jerky and bread one more time…"
As she spoke, she reached forward and, with surprisingly delicate and confident movements, prepared a pair of cups of tea. It was almost like watching a tanned, muscular Maribelle. If I took my glasses off. And squinted. And turned my head on one side. I watched with a quirked brow until she slid one over to me and noticed my look.
"What? We're not savages," she laughed. "It's not all 'ale and mead and plunder!' all the time."
"Hey, I didn't say anything," I said placatingly.
"You were thinking it," Flavia accused lightly, lifting her tea for a sip. "Sure, that's what our ancestors did, and us too on occasion when we get really bored, but that's tradition! Even we have to move with the times."
I lifted my own cup and took a sip, finding the tea strong and bitter, exactly the way I liked it. I made an appreciative sound, and Flavia smiled a little.
"Mmm, that's good," I sighed. "It's no coffee, but…"
"What's coffee?" Flavia asked.
"I'll show you in the morning," I chuckled. "If you have any now, you won't get any sleep at all."
Elle gave a long sigh behind me, and Gaila snickered.
"Better start roasting them beans, eh?" the ex-pirate said cheekily.
We just sat and chatted like this for a while, Gaila eventually relaxing and sitting with us as well. These small moments of peace and quiet were what I lived for at the moment, just relaxing. No war preparation, no paperwork, no pissed of ex-fuck-buddies.
And, judging from how tired Flavia looked when I really watched, she needed the break, too. It couldn't have been easy for her, having to be away from her nation while it was under attack. Fortunately, Basilio had a good head on his shoulders and could keep things under control. It was much the same as when the Shepherds had gone with Chrom to Regna Ferox at the start of the Plegian war, I imagined; he'd been jittery and grumpy the entire trip, nervous to get back, but relaxing once we were in Regna Ferox and support had been obtained.
"You know," Flavia said at length. "I'm glad you haven't changed."
"What do you mean?" I asked, my voice muffled by a mouthful of cookie.
"Boss, chew or talk, don't do both!" Gaila laughed.
I rolled my eyes as the two women laughed, Flavia shaking her head.
"I mean, I'm glad you haven't become some poncey noble fop," Flavia said. "That's the local term for it, right?"
"If by that you mean 'arrogant prick', then thank you, I do try to stay grounded," I smirked. "Just between us, aside from a few exceptions I can't stand the nobility here, either."
"Pft, you tell everyone that," Gaila laughed.
"Fuck you, read the room!" I snapped, grinning.
"She's not wrong," Elle added, appearing to place down a fresh pot of tea.
I threw up my hands, exaggeratedly sighing.
"See what I'm dealing with!?" I asked Flavia.
The Khan just laughed and shook her head, helping herself to another cup of tea.
"That's what I mean, though," she said, sobering a little. "I've been Khan for a while, and worked as an interpreter for my uncle, the previous East Khan, before that. I've seen a lot of Ylissean nobility. I'm glad you're not at all like them."
"So am I," Gaila agreed, grabbing another cookie.
"What is it with you and the cookies?" I asked.
"They're tasty?" Gaila shrugged.
"No, I mean you were talking about them like they were a rare commodity before," I said. "What's with that?"
"You really are from another world," Flavia snorted.
"The refined sugar that goes into cookies and other baked goods is expensive," Elle supplied. "Far too expensive for normal folk to afford, anyway."
"Then why the hell do you keep making them!?" I asked her, sitting up. "How much money are we pissing away on cookies!?"
"Do not take this away from me," Gaila warned, reaching for another cookie. I couldn't help but notice that her free hand subtly shifted to her sword.
"Relax, milord, Bertha gets the sugar from the palace," Elle said, rolling her eyes. "She trades it for helping out from time to time. Besides, I like baking. I'd prefer it if you didn't tell me to stop."
"Oh thank fuck," I groaned, sinking into my chair again. "Fine, as long as I'm not paying for it, go your hardest."
This earned another heady laugh from Flavia, the Khan actually slapping her knee as she rocked back and forth.
"Oh, I'll just bet Frederick rues the day Chrom promoted you to Duke," she laughed.
I smirked, taking a cookie and holding it up over my shoulder. Flavia jumped a little when Su'ko appeared out of the shadows, offering a barely whispered word of thanks, before disappearing from sight again. Flavia just blinked, but since nobody else reacted, she kept her peace.
"Frederick rues the day they found me in that field," I snorted. "Everything after has just been extra layers of hell for him."
It was to the ensuing laughter this statement elicited that Lucina and Cynthia made their entrance, clearly fresh from an evening run, if Cynthia's panting, sweat-drenched state was any indication. The time-traveling princesses looked surprised to see Flavia, but recovered quickly when the Khan greeted them.
"Hey, Marth!" Flavia said, smiling brightly. "Long time no see! And you I don't know, but hello all the same."
"I'm Cynthia," she said brightly, doing her best to hide her fatigue.
"Khan Flavia," Lucina nodded. "It is… surprising to see you here."
"I could say the same," the Khan shrugged. "I had no idea you were shacking up with Ben."
"I don't charge rent," I shrugged.
Cynthia fell bonelessly into a chair, grabbing a handful of the quickly-dwindling supply of cookies, while Lucina seated herself next to me.
"You will spoil your dinner," Lucina frowned at her.
"After the run you just put me through? Not likely," Cynthia snorted. "I'm a cavalryman! I don't need to run!"
"So, are you both part of the army, then?" Flavia asked.
"Not… as such," Lucina said slowly.
"They're part of my personal staff," I explained. "Which means they're not attached to any of the main three regiments, but they're still technically under my command."
Lucina gave me a grateful look at the quick thinking as Flavia nodded, satisfied by the explanation. We lapsed into a comfortable silence after that, the only sound being the sound of Gaila and Cynthia demolishing the plate of cookies, and the occasional sip of tea.
"Hey, Gaila," Cynthia asked after swallowing another cookie almost whole. "I've been meaning to ask for a while now, but what's with the mask?"
Lucina and I both shot the girl a glare, but Gaila just chuckled.
"I've been waiting for that one," she commented. "Usually it don't take so long for someone to ask about it. I took a sword to the face while we were raiding the Eastern Valentian coast a couple years back. Lost my eye and part of the skull. An eye-patch didn't quite cover it all."
"I'm… sorry to hear that," Lucina said awkwardly.
"Oh, don't be," Gaila waved her off. "It was bound to happen eventually. You don't walk away from the 'high-risk-trader' lifestyle without a few scars."
"Wow… how'd it happen?" Cynthia asked.
"We were raiding a Chon'sinian trading ship," Gaila said, leaning forward a little. "Just after Walhart annexed the country. They were flying the Valmese flag, so we thought… why not? But it was a trap. The hold was full of soldiers, just waiting for some pirates stupid enough to try and take them. We managed to get away, but not before a Chon'sinian swordsman decided to give me a parting gift. Another second, and they'd have been swabbing my brains off the deck."
"Kinda brought it on yourself then, huh?" Flavia pointed out.
"Like I said, had to happen eventually," Gaila shrugged. "At that point, we'd been hitting the Valmese navy almost exclusively, so they were right pissed at us. I'm just lucky to have gotten away at all. The really painful part was digging out whatever was left of my eye out of the socket, that was awful. Skin regrew, but the socket remains tender. It still throbs at times. Wanna see it?"
"No!" Lucina recoiled.
"Yeah!" Cynthia cheered.
"I do find myself morbidly curious," I admitted.
"Go on then," Flavia urged, grinning.
Gaila reached up, fiddling with the strap behind her ear, and leaned forward as the mask came off. As she sat back up, she pulled a small, clean cloth out of the empty socket, and Lucina made a gagging sound as she looked away. Part of the orbital bone had been cut away, and her eyelid was gone, the skin around the socket split by an old, deep scar. The side of her face with the missing eye sagged a little, but over-all the damage wasn't as bad as she made it sound. Still, with that kind of disfigurement, she wouldn't be winning any beauty pageants or turning heads any time soon. Despite those legs.
"Ooh, nice," Flavia nodded appreciatively.
"That's so cool!" Cynthia whispered, almost reverently.
Gaila actually beamed at the younger girl's reaction.
"Cynthia!" Lucina scolded, her voice shrill, and a bit queasy.
"Marth! Noire is sleeping! I swear, if you wake her…" Elle huffed, marching into the room.
She stopped when she spotted Gaila, and the unmasked ex-pirate grinned up at her.
"Ahoy!" Gaila said cheerily.
"Oh," was all Elle said.
Then she fainted.
We all turned as Elle thudded to the ground, and Lucina winced sympathetically.
"Hope she wasn't coming to tell us dinner was ready," I commented.
"Should one of us… do something about that?" Lucina asked, motioning to the unconscious maid.
"Nah, she's been getting kinda mouthy lately," I shrugged, turning away again.
"In all honesty, this was light," Gaila chuckled. "You can live easily with just an eye and you get used to the lack of depth perception. I've known crewmen who lost arms, legs, almost the entirety of their bottom torsos. I knew one poor helmsman who lost the tip of his manhood and counted himself lucky that's all he lost."
"Yeesh," I hissed, crossing my legs.
"Not bad, pirate, not bad," Flavia grinned. "But check this one out."
As she spoke, the older woman shifted in her seat, spreading her legs and presenting her right thigh to us as she yanked the bottom of her shorts up. There was a long, wide welt of fresh scar tissue along the inside and front of her toned thigh, and Flavia smirked as Lucina blanched.
"Got this one fighting over him, actually," she said, nodding to me. "The Oaf nearly cut my damn leg off. I beat him in combat, but he almost got me from blood loss."
"Hit the artery, did he?" Gaila asked.
She was already stuffing the rag back into her empty eye socket as she spoke, balancing the mask in one hand and dabbing an herbal concoction of some kind on the cloth before putting it back, working with practiced efficiency.
"Yup," Flavia nodded.
"Wait, you two literally fought a duel over me?" I asked.
"Yeah, of course," Flavia snorted. "I said as much, didn't I?"
"I thought it would have been like the Khanate duel or something," I said. "With proxies."
"Of course not!" Flavia laughed, moving to sit properly again. "This wasn't some political duel; this was over honor!"
"Yeah!" Cynthia agreed emphatically. "Duels of honor shouldn't be fought by proxy!"
"You'd know all about that, wouldn't you, Ben?" Lucina deadpanned.
I responded to her flat glare by blowing her a raspberry.
"Already had a couple duels, huh?" Flavia chuckled.
"Just one," I sighed. "One of the local nobles was shit-talking the Shepherds, all 'noble superiority' bull. So, I headbutted him."
"In the middle of a formal ball," Lucina added disapprovingly.
Flavia and Gaila laughed approvingly, and Cynthia let out a small giggle before Lucina glared at her.
"In the middle of a formal ball, yes," I agreed, rolling my eyes. "He deserved it! And Lon'qu helped! And! He let a proxy fight!"
"Shame," Flavia scoffed.
"That cowardly cuttlefish!" Gaila shook her head.
"Nice alliteration," I said, sitting up and pulling up my shirt. "Got a pretty nice scar myself out of it, though."
I looked down at the toned abs on my stomach, pointing to the nasty knot of scar tissue where Burrito's nephew had stabbed me.
"Since we agreed to fight until someone yielded, I cut his throat after he stabbed me," I went on. "Sword went right through me, I think I have an exit wound somewhere on my back, too."
"Ooh! Ooh! Speaking of scars and backs!" Cynthia said, spinning in her chair.
"Cynthia, wait-" Lucina started.
"It's fine, it's just my back!" she huffed, already yanking up her riding dress again. "Check out the one on my shoulder there! It was only a training accident, but the lance nearly went right through me, too!"
I nodded, finally remembering the support conversation she had with Kjelle about it. Then I froze at Lucina's expression. Looking back at Cynthia's bared skin, I froze, too.
And not just because of the side-boob this time.
There, opposite the scar, plain as day on her pale skin, was the Brand of the Exalt.
"Nice scar," Flavia said easily.
Cynthia smiled brightly, clearly enjoying feeling like she was part of the crowd, as she set her dress back down and turned back to us.
"Nice Brand, too," Flavia added slyly.
Cynthia gave a startled squeak, her pleased expression turning to one of terror as she glanced at Lucina.
"Uh-oh, someone's busted," Gaila smirked.
"It wasn't me this time!" I said quickly when Lucina turned to me. "You can't blame me! I didn't do it!"
Lucina just groaned, running her hands down her face.
"We are the worst at keeping secrets," she moaned.
"Nope, just y'all," Gaila shrugged. "Whatever secrets Ben has revealed thus far has been entirely of his own accord."
"That you know of," I corrected.
"Not helping!" Lucina snapped.
"Er… sorry, sis," Cynthia said dejectedly.
"I sense there's a story here," Flavia commented mildly.
"Again, not me this time," I said, holding up my hands.
"You are insufferable!" Lucina snapped at me.
"Don't take it out on me!" I shot back.
Flavia turned to Gaila, grinning evilly.
"Are they always like this?" she asked.
"I know right?" the former pirate scoffed. "Those two are either going to kill or kiss someday, or both."
"I vote kiss!" I said quickly.
"Not likely!" Lucina practically shrieked.
"Stop yelling!" Elle cut in, suddenly sitting up. "If you wake the baby, there will be a murder today."
"Well, good morning, sleepy head," I smirked over my shoulder. "Have a nice nap?"
Elle looked around, blinking in confusion.
"Did… did you just leave me here after I fainted?" she asked in disbelief.
"I'm comfy," I shrugged.
"I cannot believe you!" she hissed.
"You live with a bunch of soldiers, one would assume you'd have a stronger constitution," I deadpanned.
Elle gave a disgusted grunt, climbing to her feet and stomping off as I turned back to the awkward tableau in front of me.
"May as well tell her," I shrugged. "We're in deep now. And she already knows I'm not from round here."
"Ugh. Very well," Lucina sighed. "But I must have your oath of secrecy on the matter, Khan Flavia."
"Did Ben give his?" the Khan asked.
"He did," Lucina nodded, before shooting me a dirty look. "Bad as he is at keeping it."
I just blew her another raspberry.
"Then his word is as good as mine," Flavia nodded. "You have it."
"Thank you," Lucina nodded, taking a deep breath and drawing herself up. "My true name is Princess Lucina of Ylisse, and I hail from the future."
Flavia quirked a brow and looked to me for confirmation. I nodded, shrugging a little.
"Okay…" she said slowly. "I was expecting illegitimate daughters or something, but… so Chrom is your father, then?"
"He is," Lucina nodded. "We have travelled back in time to prevent the end of the world, heralded by the return of the Fell Dragon, Grima."
"That's… wow," Flavia breathed. "Grima? Really?"
Gaila huffed a small sigh out her nose, leaning forward a little and clasping her hands in silent prayer as Cynthia and Lucina exchanged a glance uncomfortably.
"Yup," I sighed, flopping back in my chair. "And Walhart's not helping, so that's why I'm so hell-bent on finishing this war as fast as possible."
"Ben's daughter is here, too," Cynthia added cautiously, glancing at Lucina. "The future one, I mean. I can say that much, right?"
Lucina sighed and nodded.
"She went with the rest of the army to Port Ferox with the second wave," I explained. "But I think she'll rotate out once the Port is taken, so you might meet her sooner rather than later. There's a couple others floating around here and in Baham, too."
"What? Who's in Baham!?" Cynthia asked, sitting up suddenly.
"Nah and Severa," I said slowly.
"Why didn't you say anything!?" she asked accusatorily, glaring between Lucina and I.
"It… never came up?" Lucina said slowly.
"Ugh, god, we really do suck at this," I groaned.
"That's a lot to take in," Flavia said gravely. "But you have my word I will keep your secret, Princess. And, when the time comes, the full might of Regna Ferox will stand beside you against Grima. Every martial clan of East and West Ferox, not to mention our own vassals and protectorates!"
Lucina blinked, taken aback.
"I… thank you, Khan Flavia," she said.
"I won't let my own country fall, let alone the whole world," Flavia said, sitting forward in her seat. "You have my word on that, also. This concerns us all. Should Grima truly be resurrected, the myths speak of a shadowy world, gray and lifeless, sinking into oblivion! I won't let that happen."
"Can I work for you instead?" Gaila piped up.
"Wow! Ouch!" I said, placing a hand over my heart.
"She just seems a lot more put together," the ex-pirate grinned. "Besides, you're a noble, but she's a royal. She's probably got deeper pockets, don't ya yer Khanliness?"
"Sorry, I'm not hiring right now," Flavia chuckled.
"Damn," Gaila huffed, snapping her fingers in mock disappointment.
"I'll remember that, you faithless bitch," I deadpanned.
"Love you, too, big guy," Gaila laughed.
"Can we just have some dinner and try to forget this conversation, please?" Lucina asked plaintively.
"She's just jealous because she doesn't have any cool scars," Cynthia grinned.
Lucina spluttered and blushed as we all laughed, and Cynthia looked mighty pleased with herself.
"I do too have scars!" she said indignantly. "I am just not so witless that I would remove my clothing to show them off in front of a man!"
"But… it's just Uncle Ben?" Cynthia said, uncomprehending.
"Never change, sweetie," I grinned at her.
Lucina just gave a disgusted groan, rising to her feet.
"I am going to go and check on dinner," she declared.
"Wait, sis, carry me!" Cynthia called. "My legs are jelly! Luce!"
Lucina just strode off, pointedly ignoring her sister.
"Ooh, someone's in trouble," Gaila sing-songed.
"She's got the right idea, though," I sighed. "Let's go get some eats."
"Will you carry me?" Cynthia asked weakly.
"Mm. No," I laughed.
"Whyyyyyyyyyy?" was the last thing I heard as I left the room.
It didn't take long after her arrival for Flavia to organize an 'Adoption Ceremony' for me. It was a fairly informal affair, all things considered. Apparently, some of the clan elders had kicked up a fuss back in Regna Ferox, but one thing I had learned fast was 'you don't fuck with the Khan'.
A few days after she arrived, we just assembled outside the barracks on the training field, and a bonfire was lit.
Unfortunately, Chrom was busy doing important Exalt stuff that day, so Lissa was acting as witness in his place as 'head of my clan'. She and Lon'qu were apparently planning on attending anyway, so the blonde princess was a fairly easy sell. Lon'qu hadn't said anything, just giving me a very macho pat on the shoulder as he passed, taking his place in the crowd.
Even more unfortunately, Noire hadn't been rotated back yet, and was still stationed in the north. I'd needed a second witness, from my own immediate family, and with no one else to fall back on, I'd asked Lucina to stand in. It was something of a stretch, but Flavia seemed satisfied with the whole 'Godfather' thing, so we were in the clear. Lucina had been shocked, to say the least, and had actually teared up a little as she'd accepted. I'd, for once, done the smart thing and chosen to keep my mouth shut. Cynthia had been fairly livid at being passed up as a witness, but had also shut up when Lucina had reminded her that Frederick, and not I, was her Godfather.
Some of the Feroxi had been intrigued by the concept of a Godfather, Flavia included, so I'd spent a fair chunk of time explaining the concept and duties that the title entailed to them.
The ceremony itself was all fairly simple. We would be blessed by a representative of Naga (a role being filled by a very tired, but still gorgeous-looking, Libra, fresh from the front), Flavia and I would each cut our palms and drain some blood into a fancy cup, and then said blood would be blessed before being emptied onto the fire. Then we feasted.
It was all very pagan, which had confused me as to the Naganite Church's involvement. Apparently, all the Feroxi clans worshipped Naga, too.
Who would have guessed?
Not as part of the Naganite Church, mind you. Apparently, they still weren't particularly fond of me. No, the Feroxi clans held their own worship and had their own holy representatives, all of whom Flavia had neglected to bring with her in her haste to get here and glomp me. Once more, I found myself cursing Nintendo's shallow world-building for leaving me flat-footed on this one, too.
I was sort of surprised that Libra was officiating, in a way, given the Church's undisguised dislike of me. I was beginning to worry I was going to get the poor bastard excommunicated or something.
There were a few other familiar faces in the crowd, too. All the reserve soldiers, and those that had begun being rotated off the front in Regna Ferox, were in attendance, as well as some local guests. Maribelle was present, along with some of her family's Ylisstol staff, who all looked fairly uncomfortable around the soldiers and foreign warriors. I was quietly touched that she'd shown up, actually. Yu'tsun and a small contingent of the ninjas were present, Su'ko orbiting them like a tiny moon, preening at the compliments for the work she had been doing keeping me safe. Or, well, as close to preening as the girl ever got, anyway. Gaila chatted with some of the soldiers wearing an odd amulet prominently over her breast depicting a triumvirate of dragons, one very clearly Duma if the single eye was anything to go by. A few of the more pious soldiers were giving her the stink-eye, but no one had said anything yet, so I endeavored to do a little more research about the religions in this world at a later date. Elle was present, too, with a gaggle of younger blonde-haired children that I assumed were her brothers and sisters all hovering around and pestering an infinitely patient Archer, and an older woman who could only have been Elle's mother. My maid wore her usual outfit with pride, holding baby-Noire to her chest at the front of the crowd, the baby thrilled at all the attention she had been receiving lately.
And oh, the attention. I hadn't managed to separate her from Flavia for nearly two whole days; they had even slept together that second night. The Khan actually had a surprising maternal side, and had fallen in love with my daughter at first sight. All of which thrilled Elle, who had found herself momentarily relieved of 'nanny-duty'.
It was surprisingly cute, seeing this feminine side of Flavia. I honestly felt a little bad about not expecting it from her, but in-game her character was always a somewhat one-dimensional 'warrior-woman' archetype to me. Actually getting the chance to get to know the caring, vibrant and insightful woman that was Flavia had been a real high-point of my entire time in Ylisse, and it made me feel bad that I had taken so long to really do so.
It made me wonder what Basilio was really like, too, once you got to know him. I wouldn't think of extending that thought to Frederick, though. He's a prick.
I was waiting in front of the fire we had set up, decked out in my finest formal duds. My coat, while a little heavy for this time of year and utterly stifling next to the fire, was the nicest thing I really had, so I wore that over my duty uniform. I'd taken one look at the new 'formal uniform' that Virion had apparently decided on, and then given Elle specific instructions on how to either tone the damn thing down or dispose of it entirely. My sword hung off my hip, freshly cleaned and sharpened, and I'd actually taken the effort to visit a barber that morning and get myself really nicely cleaned up. Gaila, Elle, Cynthia and Flavia had, all at separate times, commented on how well I cleaned up.
Libra stood with me, a battered old copy of the Book of Naga, or whatever the hell their holy book was called, under one arm. He looked tired, but his robes were as immaculate as they always were, and was quietly reciting prayers over the fire.
"I am happy for you," he said eventually, when he'd finished blessing the proceedings.
"I'm not getting married, Padre," I scoffed, using Gaius' nickname for him.
"No, but you are smiling," he shot back with a tired grin. "Well, as close as you ever get lately, anyway. It has been a while since I have seen you look so happy."
"He's got a point, you big grump," Lissa added.
"Big party and free food, what's not to be happy about?" I shrugged.
"You know what I mean," Libra chuckled.
"I do," I agreed, giving him a lopsided grin. "But I do have an image to maintain."
We three laughed a little at that, trailing off as Flavia approached around the fire.
She was wearing her usual outfit, although her armor had had the dents and dings buffed out of it, and it had been polished. As well, she wore her hair down instead of her usual ponytail, giving her a more mature air. Her eyes burned fiercely, not just reflecting the holy flame, but something more. A sort of furious pride and conviction, an excitement I had to admit that I felt a little guilty about not wholly sharing.
"Ready to get started?" she asked.
"Just waiting on you," I told her. "Let's get this party started already."
She nodded, a wide grin breaking out on her features. The Khan cleared her throat, before putting two fingers into her mouth and giving a long, loud whistle to get everyone's attention.
"Shut it!" she shouted, grinning good-naturedly. "We're starting!"
There was some laughter from the soldiers and the Feroxi present as everyone crowded around us near the fire. Lissa did her best to maintain something approaching 'royal decorum' at my side, but failed miserably as she grinned, too. Maribelle looked particularly scandalized, but that was nothing new. I'd probably be hearing about that later.
"Today, we welcome a new member to the Clans of Eastern Regna Ferox, and to the Björnadsila Clan in particular!" she declared, throwing her arms wide. "This man, Ben of Baham, has been a true friend to our people! A true son of Regna Ferox, that we can all aspire to emulate!"
A rowdy cheer went up from the Feroxi and the Soldiers, the present clansmen throwing up and waving their weapons in the air as they roared their approval, and the rest of the Ylisseans clapped politely until they all quieted down.
"We, today, are proud to welcome him and his family as one of our own," Flavia went on. "As a son, a brother and a father, his blood is now the blood of Regna Ferox!"
Another cheer went up, but to my great surprise, and probably every Ylissean's present, it trailed off when Flavia started to sing.
It wasn't in a language I was familiar with, which is saying something considering how much I had been exposed to in this world compared to the average person, but a few words of Ylissean and what sounded like Valmese jumped out at me occasionally. The song wasn't at all what I had expected from Regna Ferox; not a thumping, martial sound, but a lilting and carefully considered melody that flowed like the most beautiful poetry.
After a few beats, the Feroxi warriors present began to clash their weapons against each other or their shields, keeping the beat for the song.
Her voice was low and strong, resonating in her chest and carrying across the assembled crowd with ease. When I looked over at Flavia, her head was high and her shoulders back, her posture that of an opera diva. She had clearly done this before.
What was even more surprising was when the rest of the Feroxi began to join in. Their voices were rough, but not unpleasant, and clearly not unskilled. Their choir didn't overpower Flavia's voice, rather amplifying it and carrying the song to new heights.
I looked over at Libra with wide eyes, and he shrugged helplessly. When I glanced at Lissa, she just tilted her head. Clearly, they had no idea what was happening, either.
After a few minutes, the song ended, and the Feroxi let out a long cheer again. This was accompanied by much more spirited applause from the Ylisseans present this time, and Flavia turned to me with a wide smirk.
"Was… was I supposed to join in?" I asked.
"You'll learn the songs eventually," she promised.
"That was incredible, Khan Flavia!" Lissa exclaimed. "I had no idea you could sing! But I've never heard that language before."
"It's a traditional one from up north," she explained. "A lot of the nomads and tribal bands still speak it, but those of us that rule learn to speak the more common tongues. The traditions of the Feroxi tundra are as stolid and unchanging as the people who live there. The language is said to be the closest living one to the original tongue spoken by the Precursor peoples of the City of Thabes."
Flavia stepped forward again, accepting a knife and a fairly plain-looking wooden goblet from her witness. Without a moment of hesitation, she slid the blade across her hand, and let some of the blood fall down into the cup. Then, she passed them over to me, and I did the same. I even managed not to wince.
Although I did hear Lissa stifle a gasp behind me.
The goblet and knife were taken again by Flavia, who tucked the knife into her belt before casually tossing the goblet over her shoulder onto the fire. Another raucous cheer went up from the crowd, and Flavia surged forward to give me a bone-crushing hug, barreling past Libra and almost knocking him into the fire.
"Welcome to the family, little brother!" she cried happily.
"Wh- ack!- what? That's it?" I asked.
"Of course!" Flavia laughed, smiling widely as she stepped back, her hands still resting on my shoulders. "Feroxi ceremonies are usually short. Leaves more time for drinking! Although… there is one more thing."
Oh shit, I thought to myself. Here comes the hazing.
Flavia turned and barked a few words to the clansmen around the fire, who came forward bearing a small crate between them. They placed it down at Flavia's feet, giving me wide grins and nods of their own before stepping back. Rather than a ceremonial paddle, or a pink tutu or any other kind of fraternity hazing crap, though, Flavia pulled a dark fur out of the crate. The crowd grew hushed again, many Feroxi grinning expectantly.
"This," Flavia said proudly. "Is the pelt of a Feroxi Cave-Bear. They are the most feared predator in all the Northern Reaches, and is the symbol of our clan. I hunted this one myself, and have worn this pelt in battle many times. Now, I pass it on to you, my new brother, as a token of my esteem."
I took the fur reverently, my eyes practically goggling. It was lighter than it looked, but a little stiffer, too. At my curious look, Flavia chuckled.
"It's lined with iron-oak," she explained. "So it will act like extra armor for you. Wear this, and you'll never be stabbed in the back. Literally."
I turned the fur over in my hands, marveling at the pelt. Despite the dark fur, I could see the darker patches of old blood-stains, too. I was honestly touched at the gesture.
"I… don't know what to say," I admitted.
Then, my heart dropped into my gut.
"But I didn't get you anything!" I said, eyes snapping back up.
There was some laughter from the Feroxi at this, and Flavia, grinning, shook her head.
"That's not part of the tradition," she said.
"Bullshit, maybe not here, but where I'm from we reciprocate!" I huffed. "I'm not joining this clan as a leech! Gaila! Su'ko! We're going hunting, girls! What's the biggest, meanest predator in Ylisse? Ex-Wives!? The Nobility!? … Frederick!?"
There was some more laughter at my apparent panic, before Flavia cut me off with a hand on my shoulder.
"Will you relax?" she laughed. "If you really want to get me something it doesn't have to be a pelt."
A thought occurred to me, then.
"What about a weapon?" I asked her. "Would that be offensive in your culture?"
"Our culture," she corrected me. "And no, a weapon would be greatly appreciated, actually."
I let out a relieved sigh.
"Okay, great, give me a sec," I told her.
With that, I shoved the pelt into a surprised Lissa's arms and began to unbuckle the sword belt at my waist. This earned some good natured cat-calls and wolf-whistles from the clansmen, but I ignored them as I finally got the knot undone.
Buckles were definitely next on the list of shit to start developing…
"This is a sword from the House of Ylisse," I explained. "They're only given to the Royal Guards and Retainers, who are entrusted with the lives of the Exalt and their family. This is… really all I have to give, and I'd like you to have it. As a token of my esteem. Or something."
She blinked in visible surprise, taking the sword and scabbard from me with an appraising glance. I turned as she did this, snatching the pelt back from a grinning Lissa and clutching it to my chest. With a flourish, Flavia drew the blade and held it up to the firelight, and I was suddenly very glad I'd put in the effort to clean it.
"This is a good sword," she said, nodding as she sheathed it. "I gratefully accept your gift, brother."
"It's, uh… been used before," I added. "I hope that's okay? Your talk of the pelt actually made me think of it."
Flavia froze as she went to buckle the sword to her hip, gaze snapping back up to me. The assembled Feroxi went silent, and you could hear an ant fart in the sudden stillness.
"You mean this is… your sword?" she asked. "As in, not some ceremonial piece? This is your favored sword? Used in battle?"
"Why would I have a sword I don't use?" I scoffed, before frowning. "Is that not cool?"
Flavia smiled widely as she finished buckling the weapon to her hip, and the crowd broke into another raucous, weapon-clashing cheer. Unlike her earlier excited grins, though, this was a softer, more approving smile. A very genuine one. I'd clearly done something right here.
"No, that makes it even better," she explained. "Only the closest of warriors exchange their weapons. By handing me your sword, you have symbolically placed your life in my hands; this is the highest degree of trust one Feroxi can have and show in another! It's often a ritual performed at weddings, too."
"I'm not proposing!" I said quickly.
"I know!" Flavia laughed.
She surged forward and wrapped me in a big hug again as the crowd laughed at my exclamation.
"I knew this was a good idea," she said into the top of my head. "Truly, you are one of us."
I smirked a little as I returned the hug.
Strangely enough, for once I didn't mind the physical contact.
And thus, I became Duke Ben Björnadsila of Baham.
Blood-Brother of the Ruling Khan Flavia of Regna Ferox; Feroxi Tribesman.
The moment was somewhat spoiled, though, when Flavia released me and Lissa leaned in.
"Didn't Chrom give you that sword?" she asked slyly.
"You tell him and I'll kill you," I warned her.
The day after the ceremony I decided that it was probably in my best interests to stop shirking my training. I'd been getting lazy, hiding behind my paperwork and other duties, but with Flavia and what was practically an entire platoon's worth of Feroxi warriors taking up my barracks sleeping off some clearly brutal hangovers, I'd wanted to make a good impression.
Flavia had gotten absolutely blasted, spending the entire night alternating between hanging all over me and trying to get me to match her drink-for-drink. Thanks to a little creative maneuvering on the part of my ninja and my maid, I'd gotten away with nursing only three mugs of ale. It felt nice, drinking socially without having to drink myself into a coma. I'd woken on the couch in my office with my dog sleeping on my chest, and after shoving him onto the floor I'd risen and started the day.
I'd done all my drills and gone for a decent run, although it felt weird to be doing these things while the training field was so empty. I was used to it being packed with soldiers running drills, formations or just plain running. Aside from a few other early risers from the reserve platoons lost in their own routines, I was alone out here.
Probably for the best, though; I wasn't huffing or puffing, but I had worked up a good sweat. More than I should have, anyway.
Archer had joined me, too, the old dog happy for the exercise. I was happy for his company, as well; it made the place feel less abandoned.
After the workout, I led Archer back through the barracks and up to the officer's quarters. The old bastard was bounding around like a puppy, clearly excited by all the extra people. Or, maybe he was just picking up on my own improved mood. The old boy was fairly sensitive to that kind of thing. Although, all this prancing and jumping just meant that Noire would have company for her afternoon nap.
I smiled and rubbed Archer behind the ears as we reached the base of the stairs, before pulling my sweat-drenched shirt off over my head. Archer gave a happy wuff, bounding up the stairs in a manner that made me feel old in comparison as I hobbled up after him, wiping my body down with the shirt to get the worst of the sweat off.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm coming," I groaned. "Ugh. Remind me which one of us is aging in dog years again?"
Archer just stopped at the top of the stairs, giving a playful huff as his tail wagged back and forth with a speed so great it practically whistled through the air.
"Oh, fuck off," I laughed, shooing him away.
As I got to the common room, I was silently grateful for having gotten up so early. It meant that I could get out of these sweaty clothes before I even hit the bathroom, and I kicked my boots off with a euphoric moan. Archer leapt after them, worrying one back and forth for a moment before I softly kicked him in the arse.
"You know better," I told him.
He dropped the boot and barked quietly again, bumping his shoulder against my hip as he circled me and practically hopped towards the bathroom.
"Oh no!" I laughed. "I am not letting you in the bath with me after last time!"
I shucked my pants as I said this, hopping on one foot myself as I kicked them off to the side.
Elle would probably find them later.
I basked in the freedom that can only come from prancing around your house buck-ass-nude, coming to the bathroom and grabbing a towel from where we kept them on the sideboard next to the door. Another elegant piece I'd stolen from the Palace that looked very out of place in a barracks. I hated it, thought it looked ridiculous, but Tharja had always liked it, so I'd…
I snorted, turning and giving the thing a good kick. It wobbled, but otherwise all I succeeded in doing was bruising my foot.
"Archer, get the hell out," I started to say as I turned…
There was a shriek, and a slick feeling of wet skin against my own, and then I was twisting to hit the ground on my side. I landed on my shoulder, but someone pushed me down onto my back, still pressed against me.
I also noticed Archer barking and darting out of the room, the door slamming closed behind him as he barreled into it, followed by another crash.
All of this was of secondary concern, however, as Lucina looked down at me with wide, panicked eyes the color of the summer sky and a face doing a convincing impression of an overripe tomato.
"Why are you naked!?" she shrieked.
"Why are you wet!?" I asked at the same time.
"It's the bathroom!" we both shouted.
There was a bark from outside the door, and Lucina jumped off me as if she were electrocuted. A hand covered her chest as her other hid her crotch, her posture hunched and her legs pressed firmly together.
"Get out! Don't look, you pervert! I cannot believe you would stoop so low as to-"
"Hey, woah! Hold on!" I cut her off mid-rant, pointedly looking away. "This was an honest accident! Why the hell was the door open if you were in here!?"
"I forgot a towel!" she practically screamed, her voice becoming shrill. "I was trying to reach for one when your damndable dog barged into me!"
"Hey, fuck you, Archer is a good boy!" I shot back, climbing to my feet.
"Get out!" Lucina repeated desperately.
I rolled my eyes at her over-reaction, moving to open the door…
… only for it to move a few millimeters, then hit something.
"What are you doing!?" Lucina snapped.
"Door won't open," I sighed. "Archer probably knocked over the sideboard."
"It is not that heavy a piece of furniture!"
"You wanna try!?"
"Yes! Move! And don't you dare look!"
"For god's sake, Lucina, you haven't got anything I haven't seen before," I said, stepping away from the door and rolling my eyes.
I did keep my eyes averted, though, as Lucina let out a low growl. I crossed my arms, listening as she struggled with the door. After a few moments there was a thud as she kicked it in frustration. There were a few muted curses she had definitely picked up after spending too much time around me, and then Lucina let out a small shriek. I glanced back quickly, Lucina righting herself after having slipped. I didn't drink the view in, though, conscious of the fact that if she caught me staring, she'd castrate me.
"It must be stuck on something," she spat.
"Well, I brought one towel in," I sighed. "Go ahead, it's all yours."
There was a moment of silence before Lucina spoke again.
"There is no towel in here."
There was a moment of poignant silence before I sighed, shaking my head.
Archer had been in a playful mood. If he was being brave enough to go after my boot, there was a good chance he'd grab the towel on his way out, too.
"I'm gonna kill that dog," I muttered.
"Well, we shall simply have to break down the door, then," Lucina declared.
"Please don't break my barracks," I groaned.
"I am not going to stay in here, naked, with-" she began hotly.
I cut her off by sinking to the ground, sitting cross-legged and facing away from her.
"Lucina, for god's sake, grow up," I told her. "The barracks is full and it'll be breakfast soon. Someone will notice the sideboard blocking the door, and let us out. Soon. Do not. Break. My barracks."
There was a tense moment of silence, before Lucina let out a long sigh.
"You are right," she said at length. "Forgive me. I… panicked."
I waved her off over my shoulder.
"May as well get comfy," I told her.
There was another moment of silence before I heard her settle to the floor behind me.
"You want me to turn around so you can sit on the edge of the bath?" I asked.
"N-no," Lucina said. "As you say, we will most likely not… be here long. Like this."
"Luce, relax," I deadpanned. "I'm not about to hold you down and force myself on you."
"I should hope not," she growled warningly.
"Just… take a breath," I told her. "Relax. We're just two friends, sitting, stuck in a bathroom, waiting to be let out. The fact that we're naked is just anecdotal."
"I would say that the nudity is slightly more than 'anecdotal'," Lucina muttered darkly.
"Well, at least it'll be a funny story later," I shrugged.
"You had better not tell anyone about this!" she warned.
"Alright, alright, yeesh," I sighed. "Party pooper."
We sat in awkward silence for a while, stewing in the damp air, before I sighed.
"Well, this is boring," I said.
"I… am sorry you find my company so uninteresting," she said, a note of petulance entering her voice.
"We're literally sitting here in silence," I pointed out. "You want I take my bath instead?"
"Very well… what would you like to talk about?" she said hesitantly.
"I noticed-" I started to say.
"If you say a single word about my muff I will strangle you with my bare hands," Lucina warned.
"No, I wasn't gonna talk about your muff, glorious as it is," I laughed. "I was going to point out that Cynthia was wrong. You've got some pretty nice scars of your own."
"Well… of course," Lucina said. "They are not nearly as impressive as those that you or Gaila, or Khan Flavia all have, but I have been fighting all my life. Of course I have been wounded."
"You should have said something last night," I told her. "You don't always have to be left out. At least, not among us. Humans are naturally social creatures, we crave acceptance and belonging. Don't hold yourself back due to pre-conceived notions that are no longer valid anyway. Timeline has already been changed, just go with the flow."
Lucina was silent for a moment, and I pressed on.
"That one on your bicep, how'd you get that?"
"This one?" she asked.
"You really want me to look?" I laughed.
"Ah! No, you… I… er…" Lucina stammered, before clearing her throat. "There was a… Risen Chieftain. The size of the one we fought… back near Southtown. It nearly took my arm off with a single swing. I took its head off with one of my own."
"Nice!" I said.
"How…" Lucina started, hesitating before continuing. "How did you get that one on your shoulder?"
"Oh? Are you sneaking a peek?" I asked.
"No! It's just… hard to miss! I noticed it when we… you were…"
I laughed, and she trailed off.
"It was actually my first," I told her. "I got it in Southtown. Just some bandit. I didn't even think this was all real at the time. Then he damn near took my arm off, and Lissa healed me, and I went 'well, I guess I'm not in Kansas anymore'."
"I thought you were from 'Australia'?" Lucina asked curiously.
"I am, it's a reference to an old book in my homeland," I explained, my tone growing wistful. "Funnily enough, a book about a girl that's whisked away to another world, and has to save it."
"There are many stories like that where you are from?" Lucina asked.
"Yeah," I sighed. "Life is… hard. No matter where you are, I guess. But, where I'm from, we've made escapism an artform. I just… never expected to be in one of those stories myself."
"I must admit, I can see the appeal," Lucina chuckled bleakly.
"I'll bet," I chuckled back.
We lapsed into silence again after that, each of us alone with our thoughts. Mostly, I was telling myself to think un-sexy thoughts. This room was small, and smelled almost overpoweringly of the lavender floral soap Lucina so favored. It was intoxicating.
"I noticed you're still wearing that silly little charm I gave you," I said, trying to distract myself again.
True enough, she was still wearing the pendant I'd given her for her birthday. It had been hard to miss, jabbed into my collar bone.
"Ah, yes, I… never take it off," Lucina stammered.
"You should at least take it off when you bathe," I smirked. "You don't want the chain to rust."
"I… wouldn't have any harm come to it," she said softly. "It is precious to me. Cynthia… I gave her mother's ring. As a memento. She was so distraught after mother died… it helped. But I had nothing. Nothing to… remember them by. Nothing to remember you by. This… this charm you gave me, it makes me feel connected to them. And to… you."
I couldn't help but smirk again.
"You always talk about me like I was some great and mighty hero," I told her. "Sorry if I… ruined your mental image of me."
Lucina actually laughed at that, and I had to resist the urge to glance back at her. I liked it when she laughed, really let loose and went for it. Her whole face changed, lighting up and just filling with warmth in a way I'd never seen before I'd met her, and I hated to have to miss it. Damn dog.
I let out a surprised gasp, though, when she pressed her back up against mine.
"You had better not turn around," she warned, her voice vibrating through her back and into mine. "I am… just cold because I am still drying."
"I'll bet," I chuckled. "Sorry if I stink."
"It is true that you were a hero to us," she went on. "To… to me. But I must be honest, I think that… I liked getting to know the real Ben a lot more than the man I had built up in my memories."
"Maybe I'll be like him one day," I said, shrugging against Lucina.
Her skin was smooth as silk, her hair like gossamer against my shoulder. I had to resist the urge to repeat the motion to luxuriate in the sensation.
"Maybe," Lucina said. "For now, though… I think this is good."
"Good enough?" I snorted.
"No. Just… good," Lucina corrected.
"Thanks, Luce," I said softly.
We sat like that for another few minutes, nothing but the steady sounds of our breathing against each-others' backs breaking the spell that had seemingly settled over us. I closed my eyes, letting myself burn these sensations, this touch, this scent, these little sounds, into my memory.
I wasn't afraid to admit that Lucina was a very attractive young woman. She had really filled out since returning to Ylisse with me; not busty and hourglass shaped like her sister and mother, but more lithe, more toned, like her aunts could be if they had chosen to be warriors.
In short, there were worse people to be stuck in this predicament with.
Eventually, though, the spell was broken when Lucina spoke again.
"When did you get rid of your back hair?" she asked.
"I thought you weren't looking?" I teased.
"I can feel your skin," she said. "You… don't have any hair on your back."
"Nah burned it off in Baham," I shrugged. "Then Severa and Panne dumped buckets of vulneraries on me."
Lucina chuckled, leaning back against me a little more.
"You… didn't notice?" she asked hesitantly, shyly.
"Lucina, I told you I wasn't looking, and I meant it," I said. "I know you got weird royal hang-ups about your body and marriage and stuff, and I respect that."
"Th-thank you," she stammered.
We were both silent for a beat, before my curiosity got the better of me.
"Notice what?" I asked.
I felt her fidget against my back as she hesitated to answer, like she was rubbing her knees together or something. It was not a wholly unpleasant sensation.
"I got rid of the muff," she said, the words tumbling out of her.
"What!?" I shouted, starting to turn.
"Don't look, you lech!" Lucina laughed.
"You got rid of it!?" I went on, settling on the floor again.
"That… is the current style, is it not?" she asked.
"But… but…" I stuttered.
"But what?" Lucina asked.
"That was such a glorious muff!" I told her. "Like… damn, girl! My beard wasn't even that thick! That was the kind of bush you be proud of! And you just got rid of it!?"
"I am not sure if I am supposed to feel insulted or complimented," Lucina said in a neutral tone. "But I feel mortified, regardless."
"It's such a waste, though!" I insisted.
"I thought men did not like… that," Lucina muttered.
"Oh, men don't care!" I said with a scoff. "Any man that gets turned off by something like that is a jackass. As long as your hygiene is good, it doesn't matter."
"I wish you had told me that before I burned it off," Lucina sighed. "It was… unpleasant."
"Ugh, I can imagine," I shuddered. "Nah burning my ass was bad enough. I can't imagine the front."
"You had hair on your…" Lucina started, before bursting out laughing again.
"I did, fuck you very much," I sighed. "Unattractive, I know."
"What happened to it not mattering?" Lucina asked with a few final chuckles.
"I got a complex about it, okay?" I admitted.
"For a fearless war hero, you are very concerned with your appearance," Lucina pointed out.
"Isn't everyone, though?" I shrugged again.
"Fair point," Lucina agreed.
We lapsed into silence once more, and I couldn't help but grin as a thought occurred.
"You sure I can't inspect the results?" I asked coyly. "It'd be an awful shame if something were damaged by the spell…"
"You…" Lucina started, before trailing off.
"I was just kidding," I chuckled.
"No, I was going to say that I do not recall you being such a blatant flirt in the future," Lucina sighed. "But, in hindsight, I take that back. You really were."
We both burst out laughing at this, rocking back and forth against each other in our mirth.
It was then that there was a loud thump from outside, and a grinding as someone yanked the door open.
A disheveled and mostly undressed Flavia stood in the doorway, looking down at us. She was clad only in her tight shorts and the towel slung over her shoulder, her hair a veritable rats' nest, and her eyes bleary and unfocused. Behind her, looking much the same, except wearing all her clothes, was a disheveled Cynthia.
"Oh, sorry, don't let me interrupt," Flavia grinned, turning away. "Hang something on the door next time."
"Ugh! Do not be absurd!" Lucina cried, jumping to her feet. "We were locked in here by that… that… dog!"
I just sat there, watching Lucina collect a fresh towel and marveling at the fact that the muff was indeed gone.
"Are you gonna just sit there?" Flavia asked with a yawn.
"I'm sorry, you lost me at 'abs'," I said without thinking.
Abs like a boxer on that woman, swear to God…
Lucina gave a barked laugh as she retreated to her room, safely wrapped in a clean towel now, no mention of the time we had just spent holed up together. Flavia just grinned and shook her head, running a hand through her hair. I glanced further back, noticing Cynthia watching her sister leaving with a complicated expression on her face. She looked back at me, and I was treated to a panoply of emotions flitting across her face. Confusion, irritation, realization, and then settling on…
"You pig!" she seethed in disgust.
It was then that Archer, ever the bastard, leapt over the fallen sideboard, past Flavia and Cynthia, and hit me square in the chest.
AN: I have had this chapter basically done and up on (P)atreon since the end of November, but goddamned Christmas/New Year in hospitality kicked my ass and I couldn't muster the energy to finish editing until now. It sucks, but that's life.
Speaking of life, I made this announcement to my incredibly supportive patrons already last month, but I need to take a break.
Long-term readers may recall me mentioning in older author's notes me hurting my back. Wellp, I've really downplayed just how hurt it is over the years. I'm gonna be really blunt about all of this, because I don't want to come off as whining or complaining, but a few years ago I was told by a doctor that it would never get better, and I was in for a lifetime of constant pain. Without going into too many details, I've got two injuries and some scoliosis that, taken individually, wouldn't cause any problems, but added together have left me in fairly debilitating and constant pain. Then, last year I was told that that doctor was a dumbass, and that yes, we could fix it. So, that was fun. Now, the doctors say that we can fix things without surgery, but the physiotherapy is hard, and fairly involved, and there's a strong emphasis on the psychological aspect of pain management as well. Which is good, because for the last two years I've been literally thinking it would be better to be dead than to live like this another thirty years, but that's anecdotal. What it all comes down to is basically regular exercise, physiotherapy and reduction of stress. Unfortunately, this means I have to step back from my writing, and sacrifice my update schedule.
I've been treating this fanfiction thing as a second job for the better part of three years now, and while it's been fun, I need to prioritize my health, and financially supporting myself. So, I have to step back from my writing for a while, probably a good chunk of 2022 if I'm being honest. I still intend to keep writing, just… not at the pace I have been.
Now, I didn't write this with the intention to bitch, or to fish for sympathy. I promised my patrons and readers transparency, and that's what y'all got. If all of this made you feel any sympathy or feel bad for me or any crap like that, I appreciate it, but I don't need it. I'm taking care of things. Please, instead of worrying about me, go out and donate blood or plasma, bring a bag of cat litter or food to your local animal shelter, drop a couple bucks in a charity bucket or something. I can take care of myself, but if this made you feel anything, please spare a thought for those that can't.
Thank you all for your support over the last few years. Metallover will return!
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