Chapter 12
I gave a long sigh as I flopped backwards, falling prone across my bed, the sigh trailing off into a low groan. I immediately began panting again, struggling to catch my breath in the dark. I glanced down my chest to see Nowi jerkily turning and falling into the chair she'd just been bent over, her perfect alabaster skin glistening with sweat in the weak moonlight as her modest chest rapidly rose and fell.
"Ugh, god, you're gonna be the death of me, woman," I managed to gasp through my own ragged breaths.
Nowi gave a breathy laugh, still struggling to catch her own breath. It had been another long, boring day of paperwork and training, but I had to admit that I was starting to get used to finding Nowi in my bed at the end of such days. If nothing else, it was a better reason for not sleeping than my recent bout with insomnia.
"Yeah, I'm sure you'd really hate that," Nowi managed at last.
This had been our third round tonight, and we were both starting to wear out now. In fact, I doubted I had another one in me. Still, though, it had been fun, as Nowi always was.
"I'm getting too old for this," I groaned, pushing myself up.
I scooted to the edge of the bed, reaching hands that shook with fatigue to the nearly empty pitcher and refilling the two tumblers on the sideboard. Funny enough, it appeared Elle was getting wise to us, and had left a second pitcher out. I drained my tumbler in a single gulp, looking up just in time to see Nowi shuffle over.
"What's that make me?" she asked playfully.
"A cradle-snatcher, duh," I smirked.
"Jerk," Nowi chuckled, before knocking back her own drink.
With an exhausted groan that mirrored the one I'd let out, she hopped up on the edge of the bed, too. I felt bad for her, considering it was more work for her to do, given her height. With a sigh, I wrapped an arm around Nowi's waist and shuffled back on the bed, the small dragon-girl giving a squeak as I settled myself against the headboard and pulled her to my chest.
"I ever mention how nice it is that you're a cuddler?" she chuckled.
"One of the best parts," I shot back. "The men of Ylisse are missing out."
Nowi gave a contented hum, wriggling around on my lap until she was comfortable. I wrapped my arms around her, pulling her tighter against me and burying my nose in her damp hair. She smelled like sweat and sex and just a hint of that sulphureous undertone that I'd identified as being uniquely manakete.
As I breathed another deep sigh I felt the familiar spark of arousal, but it was tempered by how nice it felt just to sit her and hold her like this.
For her part, Nowi gave a very girlish giggle as she gripped my arms, doing her best to lean into my embrace.
"I'm going to miss this," she sighed contentedly. "You really do give the best hugs."
"So I'm told," I said, leaning back again. It took me a second to process the first thing she said. "But why'll you miss this? Going somewhere?"
"Nah, Ricken and I have been talking," Nowi said, bouncing a little in my lap. "With letters, ya know? He wants us to start being exclusive. He even broke it off with that other girl he was seeing."
"He broke it off with Hilly? No!" I gasped in mock surprise.
"I know!" Nowi giggled.
"Well, good," I chuckled. "Someone needs to make an honest man out of him."
"You're not… upset?" Nowi ventured tentatively.
"No," I scoffed. "We both knew what this was."
"Oh, good," she sighed, sagging with relief. "I was worried you'd take this the wrong way."
"Bad experiences?" I asked gently.
"More than I'd like to admit," Nowi grumbled. "I should really make time to go see your homeland. If everyone's like you, I think I'll have a lot more fun there."
"If you can actually manage to make it to my homeland, you let me know," I laughed.
We lapsed into comfortable silence after that, content to enjoy each other's presence and warmth. I even started to drift off a little, before I spoke again.
"How do you deal with it?" I asked her. "The, uh, thought that you'll eventually outlive us all, I mean."
"Where did that come from?" Nowi asked.
She shifted in my lap, moving to perch on my knee and looking up at me seriously. Judging from the tone of her voice, I'd either worried her or pissed her off, neither a fun prospect.
"I was just… thinking," I said. "My mouth got the better of me, sorry. I probably could have worded that better."
There was just enough light in the room that I could see the contours of her face shift into a frown, and I was worried I'd just made things worse until she reached out and placed her hand on my shoulder to steady herself in her position.
"It's just part of life," she said, looking up at me. "I miss all the friends I've ever made. I miss my parents. But… I know if I don't take these chances as they come…"
"You'll regret it," I finished for her.
"Exactly!" Nowi said, smiling brightly. "I knew, if anyone would get it, it'd be you!"
"Well, gee, thanks," I smirked back. "After all, tis better to have loved and lost than never loved at all."
Nowi looked up at me, her smile dimming a little as she concentrated.
"You're different, you know," she said after a while.
"Because I got that nine?" I asked. "Or because I can quote playwrights from my homeland?"
"No, silly," she giggled. "I mean, you're different from the people of Ylisse. Like, your aura. It's different."
"My 'aura', huh?" I scoffed, pulling her back into an embrace.
"Hey, manaketes are magical beings," Nowi huffed, still snuggling up into my arms "We can sense stuff like that!"
"Okay, okay," I soothed. "Different how?"
Nowi went silent for a moment, and I could imagine her face scrunched up as she thought about it.
"It's kinda hard to explain to someone who can't feel them," she said after a moment.
"I get that," I sighed, closing my eyes and leaning back. "Like, how do you explain vision to a blind man, how do you explain sound to a deaf man, that kind of thing."
"You are really understanding about the weirdest things," Nowi laughed.
I couldn't help but grin along with her musical laughter, the sound infectious.
"I am educated, you know," I told her. "As hard as I try to hide the fact."
"So you keep telling us," Nowi chuckled, before sobering. "Hey… what's it like?"
"Useless," I scoffed. "It was a total waste of four years of my life that-"
"No, not being educated," Nowi laughed again. "I meant… being in a 'serious' relationship with someone. You were married in your homeland, right?"
"Just about," I grumbled, before sighing. "It's pretty much just like what we've been doing, except you don't have sex with anyone else until the relationship or one of the parties in said relationship expires. I mean, there's also kids and stuff, but… blegh. Clearly, if I'm any indication, a relationship isn't exactly necessary for that part."
"No, but you are a good daddy for little Noire," Nowi giggled. "The two of you are so cute together! I've never seen any other man behave the way you do with their children!"
"She's my baby girl," I shrugged. "I'd kill for her, and I'd die for her. That's what parents do."
"No, that's what good parents do," Nowi corrected.
The silence that followed began to get a bit uncomfortable.
"So… Ricken, huh?" I asked, trying awkwardly to change the subject.
"Yeah!" Nowi said excitedly, her energy clearly beginning to return now. "He was always really fun to play around with in Plegia, but ever since he's started working for you, he's just been… I don't know. More confident. More serious. It's really sexy. Plus, all that exercise for the army has just made him… rawr."
"I don't know how I feel about talking about my replacement while we're still naked and covered in each other's-"
"Ew, gross!" Nowi laughed, cutting me off. "Don't say that!"
"Do you know how mad my maid gets when she has to clean up after us?" I went on.
"I blame you," Nowi chuckled. "You and that devilish tongue of yours."
"Rawr," I said, leaning down to kiss the top of her head.
Another moment of companionable silence passed, before Nowi spoke again.
"We still get to be friends, right?" she asked softly.
"Yes?" I said, unsure what she was getting at.
"Okay, good," Nowi sighed, relaxing against me again.
"I'm not gonna be part of a 'Devil's Three-Way', though," I smirked. "Once was enough for one lifetime. You and Ricken gonna have to find another third."
"Aw, you're no fun," Nowi huffed.
The next morning I left Nowi slumbering wrapped up in my blankets, stretching my arms above my head as I shambled into the empty hallway. It was a little later than I usually rose, but I wasn't working today.
Instead, I was doing something much worse.
I was politicking.
It was also probably for the best that I was rising so late; I'd needed the extra rest. I still hadn't been sleeping well, and even Nowi wearing me out had only resulted in a few fitful hours.
"I miss booze," I muttered to myself, running a hand down my face.
With my vision obscured, I missed the obstruction in my path until it yelped and scared the shit out of me, Archer jumping away from me as I trod on the old dog.
"Gah! Archer!" I practically shrieked.
Archer's tail dipped and his head lowered, eyes upturned as he whined at me.
"I'm so sorry, boy!" I sighed, kneeling down.
I felt a profound sense of guilt, the kind that can only come from accidentally hurting a beloved pet, as the dog perked back up. Archer forgave me instantly, all but prancing over to me with his tail wagging. I indulged in spoiling the old dog with pets and scratches for a time, soothing my guilty conscience, before the familiar ache of hunger in my gut finally forced me to stop.
"How 'bout it, boy? Breakfast?" I asked him.
Archer responded with a familiar wuff, before leaning up and licking my cheek.
"Alright, alright, dog-breath," I laughed, gently pushing the excited animal back as I rose.
Archer gave a soft bark again before spinning in place, eliciting a small chuckle from me, before he bounded off into the common room. My chuckle turned into a full laugh as I heard a thump, a shriek from my maid and the laughter of my young daughter, all in quick succession.
"Archer!" Elle admonished. "I'm going to skin you alive!"
"I'd prefer it if you didn't," I smirked, striding into the room.
Elle snapped back up from where she was glaring at Archer, sitting on the floor next to where baby-Noire was perched on the sofa next to Olivia. The maid smiled brightly and dropped a smart curtsey, attentive to decorum as always.
"Good morning, milord," Elle said. "I have prepared a light breakfast for you."
"Thank you, I'll take it here," I yawned.
I glanced over as I heard Noire giggle again, Olivia leaning over the girl and wiping her face with a handkerchief. It was rare to see Olivia at all these days, let alone see her sitting still like this. She still looked a little frazzled, but I knew for a fact that she wasn't anywhere near as hard-pressed as she had been at the beginning; in fact, a little cravat-wearing birdy had even told me she had found the time to start a little hobby project, a dance troupe in the Third Platoon, complete with an accompanying regimental band.
Gaila was sitting across from her, grinning as well and shaking her head.
"Morning, Gaila, Pinky," I yawned. "Don't see you around much anymore."
I moved to take the spot next to Noire that Elle had just vacated, my little girl giggling happily as she reached up to me. Archer, true to form, came a moment later and parked his arse on my boot. The former pirate leaned forward to give Archer a fond pat, exposing a tantalizing glimpse of her cleavage.
Fortunately, Olivia snapped my attention back before I could get caught looking.
Again.
"I'm starting to feel like my platoon is the only one that's gotten less busy since this whole war started," the dancer sighed, wilting somewhat guiltily.
"Makes sense, considering most of us aren't even here," I said.
"Technically, we're not at war yet," Gaila pointed out, glancing up from my dog. "Regna Ferox is."
"Semantics," I waved her off, before stifling another yawn.
"Are you getting enough sleep?" Olivia asked, concernedly. "You look…"
"Like shit," Gailia supplied when Olivia trailed off. "Your eyelids look heavy as an anchor, Boss."
"Really? Because I feel like hell," I quipped, before groaning. "Ugh. What is this 'sleep' you speak of?"
"That's not healthy," Olivia frowned.
"Maybe if you weren't so busy defiling her holiness the Lady Dragon every night you might actually get some rest," Gaila practically growled.
"Uuh!" Noire burbled happily, going unnoticed between us.
"Excuse the fuck out of you," I shot back tiredly. "Who I share my bed with is none of your fuck-mothering business."
"Uck!" Noire squealed.
"It's not right," Gaila insisted. "It's… improper."
"Oh, fuck off," I groaned. "She's older than everyone in this room put together, and-"
"That's not what I'm talking about!" Gaila pressed, cutting me off.
"Ffffffffff…" little Noire whistled, earning a funny look from Olivia.
"Lady Nowi is a Divine Dragon," Gaila went on, clutching at her weird little three-chambered pendant thing again. "One of Naga's holy messengers, and the fact that you defile her every night-"
"Stop," I cut in. "Stop-stop-stop-stop-stop, for the love of fuck, stop."
"Fuck!" Noire giggled.
Every set of eyes in the room turned to look at my brightly smiling daughter, who gigged and spoke her first word again.
"Fuck!" she repeated happily.
As she did, Elle made her reappearance, carrying a tray of my breakfast. The maid didn't even break stride, just set the tray down before me and huffed.
"Well," she said primly. "I owe Toady two silver now. Thanks."
And thus, the tension evaporated from the room as everyone began to either chuckle or groan.
"That kinda takes the wind out of my sails," Gaila said, a grin slowly rising to her face. "She'll make a natural sailor, this one."
I gave a long-suffering groan, placing my head in my hands.
"I hate it here," I muttered.
"Fuck!" Noire just laughed.
"And on that note, I'm taking her downstairs before you potty-mouths can corrupt this sweet little angel further," Olivia bristled, gathering Noire up in her arms.
"I'll be down to check in on her later, Lady Olivia," Elle said helpfully.
"Fuck!" Noire shrilled.
"No, sweetie, we don't say that," Olivia hushed the child.
"Fuck?" Noire asked, as Olivia swept her out of the room.
There was a moment of silence before I sighed again.
"Tharja's gonna kill me," I half-sobbed.
As if the Dark Mage wasn't already mad enough at me…
Sumia would never let me hear the end of this, either…
And, God damn, Lucina would-
"I can't imagine Noire will be very thrilled with this news, either," Elle added unhelpfully.
"Yes, thank you for that insight," I growled.
"I meant what I was saying earlier, though," Gaila said, frowning again. "The Divine Dragon Clan, as higher beings, are to be respected and revered, but it's not our place to cavort with divinity!"
"That's a fancy way of saying 'fucking'," I drawled.
"I'm being serious, Boss," Gaila sighed irritably. "This's important; there's stories of things that happened to humans that didn't respect their divinity. Kingshield Duma destroyed Thabes 'cause of some human that tried to blur the lines between dragon and man, instead birthing an abomination-"
"Look, Gaila, I respect your right to believe whatever the hell you want," I sighed, cutting her off. "But Nowi isn't some religious figure; she's a person. Finding out you think of her like that would probably really upset her, too. She's just… Nowi."
"But…" Gaila said, deflating a little. "A goddess deserves to be worshiped! Why would my devotion displease her?"
"Just… try talking to her or something," I suggested. "She'll be all over you, she loves making friends."
"I-I-I could never!" Gaila said quickly. "To be so… I mean, I… she's… she's a god! What's next, someone marrying Naga's Voice herself!?"
"I wouldn't say no," I shrugged, grinning.
"What would I… even say to her?" Gaila asked, clearly choosing to ignore my bait.
"Try starting with hello," I chuckled.
Gaila gulped and nodded slowly, looking down.
"I never figured you for the religious type, though," I said, grabbing a hunk of bread and leaning back in my seat.
"Everyone gotta believe in something," Gaila huffed, helping herself to one of my bread rolls. "How can you not? What gives you hope, Boss?"
Elle looked like she was about to smack the roll out of the ex-pirate's hand, but restrained herself. I was beginning to think my maid didn't like my assistant very much…
"Honestly?" I asked around a mouthful of bread. "You. Lucina. All the soldiers. All the people here, working to make things better. That's what I believe in."
"That sounds an awful lot like what Walhart's lot say," Gaila frowned.
"Except for one key difference," I smirked. "I don't think of myself as any more important than the rest of you."
Gaila barked out a laugh, shaking her head and spitting crumbs everywhere. I thought Elle would have an aneurism, the way her face went red. The maid took a deep breath, though, turning a thoughtful expression towards me.
"Milord, do you… truly have no faith in the divine?" she asked hesitantly.
"I don't need faith," I sighed. "I have knowledge. I know Naga exists. There's literal proof."
"All the more reason to worship her!" Gaila insisted.
"No, you're missing the point!" I groaned. "Naga's not here! We are! The world only gets better if we make it better!"
This actually brought Gaila up short for a moment, the cyclopean former pirate gaping like a beached fish before Elle spoke again.
"And… Eru Illuvatar?" my maid asked.
"God fucking dammit, Emm," I groaned, lowering my face into my hands. "We are not discussing this."
"Actually, we kind of are, Boss," Gaila said, grinning maliciously.
"Alright, fine," I said, sitting back up and snatching up another breadroll. "Eru Illuvatar is the fictional deity of a fictional world in a work of fiction that I hold in very high regard. I used him as an example to Emm which she has apparently chosen to take literally."
"I… see," Elle said slowly.
"I don't," Gaila snorted.
"Look, just… Like I said, what you believe is your business," I said around another mouthful of bread. "But try actually talking to Nowi, please. It would… make her really happy."
"Milord, that was… oddly sweet of you," Elle commented, blinking in surprise.
"I'm tired, shut up," I mumbled. "Jeez, someone woke up and chose violence today."
"I know what kind of mess you and Nowi make out of that bed," Elle deadpanned.
Gaia choked on her bread and blushed scarlet, pounding her chest a few times before reaching for a cup of water.
"Do you have any idea how expensive it is to keep replacing the down feathers in that mattress?" my maid went on darkly.
"No," I shrugged. "Wait, my mattress is literally made out of feathers?"
"I… yes?" Elle said slowly. "That is the highest quality bedding nobles can get. The filling of the mattress is made of layers of feathers and fresh hay. And your quilt and pillow are all goose feathers."
"Why? What're they made of in your world?" Gaila asked, clearly eager to change the subject.
"Foam and springs and… other stuff that doesn't exist here yet," I said, before sighing.
I slapped my thighs, grabbing another roll as I rose.
"And water, too," I added.
"What?" Gaila and Elle both asked at once.
"Think about what I said anyway, Gaila," I said, grinning. "I'm not saying to stop believing… whatever it is you believe, but just… give Nowi a shot."
The former pirate seemed to deflate again, suddenly looking very tired.
"What would I even say?" She asked softly. "A sinner, like me…"
"Are you kidding? Nowi would probably go nuts for some daring pirate stories," I grinned. "Speaking of whom, I'm gonna go try and catch a few more hours sleep before this bullshit meeting this afternoon."
"You could probably use it," Gaila sighed. "I'll just ignore who else is in your bed for now. Until I think. And pray. And… yeah."
"Thanks," I yawned. "But you don't really need to worry. We went at it all night; she ain't getting any more outta me-"
Gaila made a disgusted sound, jumping to her feet and charging away down the hall. Even Elle smirked a little at the ex-pirate's discomfort, convincing me I'd been a terrible influence on my adorable little maid.
Still, though, I cackled maniacally as I made my way back to my bed and the manakete-shaped heater waiting within.
It felt like my head had only just hit the pillow and my eyes only just closed when Gaila came pounding on my door again. Then, when I didn't immediately respond, there was a familiar crash of a pan being smacked by a ladle.
I groaned and rolled over onto my back, prompting my little spoon to squeak and steal all the blankets to keep her absurdly high body temperature up.
"This better be important!" I called, running a hand down my face.
Nowi made an incoherent sound of dissatisfaction next to me as I yelled, burrowing deeper into the blankets.
"It is, Boss," Gaila said, sticking her head in the room.
"Who said?" I asked, looking at the ceiling.
"I did," she huffed.
"You're fired," I snapped.
"Good, do your own damn paperwork," Gaila smirked.
"You're re-hired," I sighed, sitting up. "What's going on?"
"Why do you people hate sleep!?" Nowi cried, throwing back the covers and sitting up suddenly.
I quirked a brow as Gaila went a deathly shade of pale and dropped the pan and ladle she had been holding, and I glanced back at where Nowi was alternating glaring at us.
Conveniently forgetting the fact that she was still naked.
"I'llseeyouinthecommonroomBossgottago," Gaila said, all in one breath, before beating a hasty retreat.
Nowi yawned widely, displaying those wicked little fangs she knew how to make such good use of, before finally looking down at her naked self.
"Huh," she scoffed. "You'd think a pirate would be more worldly."
"It's less about the boobs and more about what they're attached to," I sighed.
"What boobs?" Nowi asked, her voice all sweet innocence.
"You know what I mean," I laughed. "Get dressed already, you're distracting me."
"Pervert," Nowi purred.
As she got up and began to pull on her smallclothes, the petite manakete glanced over her shoulder at me, frowning thoughtfully.
"Does Gaila not like manaketes?" she asked.
"Quite the opposite," I sighed again. "She's a devotee. She thinks you're some kind of divine messenger."
"Oh. One of those. Ugh," Nowi said, making a face. "I hate those types. They're so clingy, and they treat me like I'm made of porcelain. I hate it."
There was a momentary silence, before Nowi glanced back at me.
"You don't see me like that, right?" she asked softly.
"Not only have I spent every night this week treating you with the roughest sex I've had since I was seventeen, but, if you'll recall, I've thrown you off a building before," I pointed out, quirking a brow.
This elicited a peal of happy laughter as Nowi went back to getting dressed.
"Give her a chance," I said, pushing myself to my feet. "We had a chat this morning, and I think she's coming around. Be patient with her. I think the two of you could be good friends."
Nowi nodded thoughtfully as she pulled her strappy top over her chest, reaching for her little cape thing where she'd thrown it across the room the previous evening.
"Okay," she said brightly. "I'll try."
"Thanks," I smiled. "You're the best."
"I know," she laughed. "If I explain to her that Manaketes are just as mortal as humans are, that we have all the same wants and needs, she's bound to listen, right?"
"If you say it?" I scoffed. "She'll probably make carvings of it and put it in a shrine."
"That's the opposite of what I want, though," Nowi groaned. "Maybe a cute nickname would help?"
"A what?" I chuckled.
"A nickname!" Nowi said, hopping up and down a little in her excitement at the idea. "Like, like, this really old Manakete named Nagi told me once that Tiki used to give them to people! Like Mar-Mar and Tar-Tar!"
Nowi spun in place, her cape swirling around her shoulders with her hair, before skipping up to me and wrapping herself around my stomach in a tight hug. This effectively distracted me from asking when she'd ever met Nagi, or who the fuck 'Tar-Tar' was. Instead, I smiled a little as I stroked her hair, realizing I'd miss this intimacy.
"I'm sure I'll still be seeing you around a lot, what with Ricken and all," I said. "But… don't be a stranger, okay?"
Nowi stepped back from me and gestured with her hand for me to bend down to her level. She surprised me, then, by giving me a deep, passionate kiss. After a few moments she stepped back, an impish smile on her face.
"I'd never dream of it," she giggled.
Then she was gone, skipping out of my room, off to do Naga only knew what it was that she did with her down-time.
I sighed, running my hands down my face, before grabbing my jacket and making to meet Gaila.
I had work to do, after all.
My assistant was sitting in the common room, holding her amulet in both hands and looking very conflicted when I found her. I decided to be all business, so that she'd have time to come to terms with this. The timing could have been better, but at least she didn't look like she was about to kill me…
"You woke me up, this better be good," I growled, stomping into the room.
To my great surprise, it wasn't Gaila that answered me.
"You're damn right it is."
With a sudden flash of red, a familiar tsundere form rose and flicked one of her long twintails over her shoulder. Severa grinned as my jaw dropped, shaking her head as she stepped up and wrapped her arms around my neck in a tight hug.
"Sev?" I said, dumbfounded. "What… you… here… why?"
"Eloquent, Boss," Gaila chuckled.
"Silence, henchman," I huffed.
The ex-pirate laughed, causing Severa to step back and give the other woman a curious look.
"This is Gaila, my assistant," I explained. "Former pirate, so she's got no manners or concept of 'authority', and yes, she already knows about Lucina and the rest of you."
"Oh, so your one of them future people," Gaila nodded, crossing her legs. "I just figured you were another of the Boss's conquests. I swear, even Yem, the dashing Corsair King and Scourge of the Valmese Navy, never had as many!"
I spluttered, but Severa actually laughed and slapped my chest with the back of her hand.
"He wishes," she grinned, before turning back to me. "And I came down with the contingent from Baham."
"There's a contingent from Baham?" I repeated slowly.
"How little sleep are you getting?" Gaila scoffed.
This caused Severa to shoot me a dirty glare, but I shook my head to silence her.
"Yes," I deadpanned. "Now. Explain."
"For the parliamentary meeting, Boss," Gaila sighed. "They're here for that big meeting today. Representatives for the House of Commons? Security detail? Ringing any bells?"
"Oh shit, that was today?" I groaned, running a hand down my face.
I couldn't believe I'd forgotten it so quickly…
"Are you sure this is a good idea with you so tired?" Gaila asked seriously.
"Yeah, sure, what's the worst that could happen?" I shrugged, continuing before anyone could answer my very rhetorical question. "Now. Who's where?"
Severa rolled her eyes, grabbing me by the arm and leading me towards the offices.
"The important people are waiting in the meeting room," she said.
"I know where my meeting room is," I muttered, half-heartedly trying to tug my arm free.
"Yeah, but I don't trust you to get there alone right now," Severa huffed, before lowering her voice conspiratorially. "Gawds, what the hell is wrong with you? You look like a strong breeze is gonna knock you over."
"Wow, nice to see you, too," I deadpanned.
"That came out wrong," she sighed. "I'm worried about you."
"I'm fine," I said automatically.
"Are you?" Severa pressed.
"Yes, Sev, I'm fine," I sighed. "Just… having trouble sleeping."
We stopped in front of the meeting room door, and Severa pulled back to give me a long, hard look.
"Alright, but we're not done talking about this," she promised, before stepping into the room.
I smirked and shook my head.
"Of course we're not," I sighed fondly. "Hurricane Severa sweeps through again, huh?"
Gaila stepped up beside me, giving me a curious look with one eyebrow raised.
"You sure you two ain't bumping uglies?" she asked.
"Ha! He wishes!" Severa shot over her shoulder with a grin.
I just shook my head again and shrugged, indicating we follow.
Inside, the large room was almost empty, save for Severa and two other men I recognized, despite their brand-new forest-green duty-uniforms. Archer was there, too, the old dog being pampered by the guests. Helman and Jeremiah both stood as I entered, the old former-Duke smiling broadly as he stepped around the dog and strode up to me, before tightly clasping my hand.
"By Naga, it's good to see you again, lad," he said, moustache twitching with his mirth. "You look a little thinner than the last time I saw you. Are you eating right?"
The smiling older man sported a large blue sash over his uniform, clearly displaying the Mark of Naga, the stag's head symbol of Baham, and practically clanking with the medals on it.
"Dear lord, Helman, you're not that old," I laughed. "Although, it's good to see you, too. And you, Jeremiah. Where's Nah?"
"She said that she needed to stay in Baham," the younger man shrugged.
"Someone needed to keep the Regiment running with the three of us here," Severa pointed out blandly. "By the way, when were you going to give us ranks? And pay?"
"She has a point," I said, frowning and ignoring her questions. "What are the two of you doing here?"
As we were speaking, Archer came up with his tongue lolling and tail wagging and parked himself on my boot. I bent down to rub his head as Helman answered, the older man giving us a warm smile.
"I may no longer be Duke or part of the House of Lords, but I am actually a member of the Commons," Helman explained. "I thought you could use some local clout on your side if it came to a vote, and the young firebrand agreed. I was voted into the position just after you left."
He finished with a smirk, indicating to Severa with a jerked thumb, and she rolled her eyes. She tried but couldn't quite hide her smirk.
"Jeremiah's here as a representative of the Baham regiment," the older man went on. "And as part of my honor guard."
"So, old blood for the vote, new blood for the inevitable fight, gotcha," Gaila nodded.
As she spoke, she went around the side of the room to where Elle had evidently left a tray of snacks and tea for our meeting before I'd arrived.
"I'm sorry, but who are you?" Jeremiah asked, his smile frosty.
"I'm the Boss' First Mate," Gaila said, cramming a cookie into her mouth.
"You're a pirate," Jeremiah spat.
"Ex-pirate," Gaila shrugged, brushing the crumbs off her top. "Why? Jealous? Maybe all that hair's not the only feminine thing about ya, hey boy? I hear that's a little more frown on here on land."
"You! I! Nah-" Jeremiah sputtered indignantly.
"She's my assistant," I sighed, heading off the argument. "Don't let the attitude fool you, she's a lot smarter than she lets on."
"Lies and slander," Gaila said in another shower of crumbs.
"Reminds me of someone else I know," Helman chuckled. "You do have a way of attracting the strangest, most brilliant people to your side, Duke Baham."
"Don't start that," I groaned. "Gaila, stop being so prickly. I need you to play nice. Jeremiah, all that hair is, while gorgeous, also somewhat effeminate."
"It is not!" he blustered.
Gaila laughed, though, coming up and giving Helman a slap on the back.
"I like this one," she said with a grin. "He knows talent when he sees it."
"Be careful, everyone, don't trip over her ego," I deadpanned, turning back to Helman. "Do we need to prepare some bunks for you and your men?"
"Well, I suppose with you in my old house now, I probably will need a place to sleep," he said, sighing.
This brought me up short, and Gaila and I exchanged a glance.
"What do you mean, your 'old house'?" I asked slowly.
"Aren't you living in my Ylisstol Estate?" Helman asked.
"I'm living here," I said flatly.
"Why are you living in your barracks?" Helman asked incredulously.
"Because someone forgot to tell me I owned an Estate in Ylisstol!" I shouted exasperatedly.
There was a moment of silence, before Helman cleared his throat awkwardly.
"Um… whoops?" he said sheepishly. "Well then… I assume you'll want the bigger one?"
I swear, I almost had an aneurism at that moment.
"I HAVE MORE THAN ONE!?"
An hour after finding out I was apparently a property owner in Ylisstol, and Helman promising to show me to 'my' mansion after the big political do today, I found myself calling on Maribelle.
I'd washed, changed, drank about two liters of coffee, and was now on my way to the Palace, but had offered to escort Egred and Maribelle. Mostly because it was on the way, but also because I wanted the other Duke to know I wasn't holding his decision against him; I wasn't about to alienate one of the few political friends I actually had just because he was justifiably disagreeing with my position.
I wore my plainer version of the blue army dress uniform beneath the pelt that Flavia had given me, the head of the bear covering the clasp on my shoulder that held it in place. Honestly, the thing was stifling and heavy, but it did make me look pretty badass. On my hip hung a silver sword that Olivia had scrounged up from the stockpile in our armory, which the dancer had apparently polished to a mirror sheen the previous evening. I'd had Gaila make a note for me to find a permanent replacement for the sword I'd given Flavia; the only time I'd seen the Khan put the blade down lately was either when she was holding my kid or a mug of ale, sometimes both at the same time.
I was hardly passing the bar of what was considered 'presentable' for high society here in Ylisse, but I was genuinely too tired to care. It was good enough.
Erutreya and her squad were looking sharp, too, all cleaned up as my honor guard. All ten of them had polished their armor and shined their boots, and wore deep blue sashes over their breastplates to denote their allegiance to House Ylisse, displaying the House Ylisse crest above Baham's, similar to Helman's. The last part had been my idea, to make sure everyone knew where my own loyalties lay.
None of that treason rumor bullshit for me, no thank you.
The ten soldiers also had the first ten of our fancy new helmets planted firmly atop their heads, a fact that I was incredibly relieved to see, which were already attracting some curious looks from the soldier-types we'd passed on the way here.
Striding along a pace behind me came the final two members of our little party, Gaila and Su'ko. Gaila had made an attempt at tidying up, even if she looked like she was wearing a stereotypical pirate costume complete with a tricorn hat with a big peacock feather in it, but Su'ko looked like a different person.
The young ninja wore an elegant kimono of blue silk with golden fox patterns on it, her hair carefully pinned up with delicate-looking steel sticks. She looked wholly uncomfortable in the get-up, and no doubt had at least a dozen blades strapped to her body, but I had to admit, my little ninja cleaned up nice.
"Y'all wanna wait out here?" I asked as we approached Duke Egred's manor. "I don't expect I'll be long."
"Sir, yes, sir!" Erutreya snapped sharply. "Company! Halt!"
The ten soldiers following us stopped in perfect lockstep, standing as upright and still as statues. The shout actually made Gaila jump a little.
"Uh… at ease?" I said, quirking a brow. "Ah, whatever, I'll be right back."
With that I mounted the stairs to Maribelle's house, reasoning that it was good that the soldiers were taking this seriously.
I knocked three times with the brass knocker on the door, the same way I had last time, and had barely pulled my hand back before the door was opened. The same distinguished old butler greeted me, bowing low as he stepped back to usher me inside.
"Duke Ben, a pleasure to see you again," he said cordially.
"And you as well, uh… sorry, I don't actually know your name," I said awkwardly.
"Ah, forgive me, Your Grace," the butler said, bowing again. "I am Duke Egred's butler and steward of his Ylisstol estate, Eduard. Forgive me, milord, but have I displeased you?"
"No, I just like to know who I'm talking to," I sighed, before adding brightly, "It's a pleasure to see you again, too, Eduard."
"Thank you, Your Grace," the old man said, smiling back. "I shall inform the Duke and Young Lady that you have arrived."
"Don't bother, Eduard, we're ready to go."
I glanced up as Egred and his wife, Margaritte, strode into the room with their arms entwined, Maribelle following a short way behind.
Egred, like me, was opting to wear a ceremonial uniform, its breast pinned with medals and a cavalry saber hanging from his hip. His high-topped riding boots looked a little goofy to me with their greaves and knee-guards, but then I probably looked ridiculous to them, so I kept my mouth closed. Margaritte wore a graceful looking dress that matched the blue of her husband's uniform, complete with high collar that looked like it was more likely to be choking her than anything else, a veil covering her hair that was a subtly lighter shade than her dress, and enough ruffles throughout the outfit to fill a chip factory. Maribelle wore a dress in the pastel pink color she so seemed to favor cinched tight around the waist, her trademark ringlets bobbing loosely around her face, but with the sleeves hanging off her shoulders and displaying a no doubt borderline scandalous amount of skin for the locals. She'd also done her makeup, with smokey eyes and a light blush across her cheeks.
Yet, something was off about her.
For once, her trademark parasol was nowhere to be seen.
This fact alone shocked me the most.
Egred strode up and clasped my hand smiling almost as brightly as his butler, and as he stepped back his wife held her hand up for me to kiss in greeting again. As Maribelle approached, though, I frowned. She was shuffling awkwardly and drawing very short breaths… then I glanced down, and realized just how tight her waist was cinched, and I closed my eyes in exasperation as she held her hand up to greet me, the way her mother had.
"Duke Ben, is something amiss?" Egred asked.
"Possibly," I said, glaring at Maribelle. "Seeing as we're on a schedule here, and I care about your daughter's wellbeing, I'm going to cut to the chase. Maribelle, are you wearing a corset right now?"
Margaritte gave a scandalized gasp and flipped her fan open, no doubt hiding the grin on her face at the thought of juicy gossip, and Egred's jaw worked soundlessly for a few moments. Maribelle, for her part, just groaned and massaged her temple with the fingertips of one hand.
"Duke Ben," Egred said after a moment, his tone low and dangerous. "May I ask why you are enquiring about my daughter's undergarments?"
"I am sure this is just some cross-cultural misunderstanding, father," Maribelle said, glaring at me.
"No, it's not," I deadpanned, crossing my arms. "Where I'm from, we learned long ago just how dangerous corsets were for the women who wore them."
"Dangerous?" Egred repeated, expression softening a little as he exchanged glances with Margaritte.
"Yes," I nodded. "Not only do they constrict the chest and prevent breathing, but long-term they can also damage internal organs by forcing them out of place. In extreme cases, they can also break ribs."
"Fashion is not meant to be comfortable," Maribelle pouted.
"They are dangerous," I repeated, before sighing. "Please tell me you don't do other stupid fashion things like eat arsenic wafers or, heaven forbid, wear cyanide green."
"What is wrong with arsenic and cyanide?" Egred asked slowly.
"They're toxic," I said. "Very, very toxic. As in, can kill people toxic. Maribelle, I understand trying to fit in, but for God's sake, think of your health."
"I see," Egred nodded. "And you say this is a proven fact in your homeland?"
"Spies use cyanide to commit suicide when captured," I shrugged. "Arsenic is used as an insecticide, as poison gas. Small doses of both can be fatal. We have… a lot more experience with them back home."
"I don't use… arsenic wafers," Maribelle said, looking away with a blush.
"Oh my god," I groaned, running a hand down my face. "Are you people trying to kill yourselves!? Go take that stupid thing off before you pass out! And if you have anything, and I mean anything, dyed with cyanide, bury it! Stick it in a lead box and bury it! And throw the arsenic in the hole with it!"
"Now you are just being ridiculous," Maribelle huffed.
Or, tried to huff, anyway. Halfway through inhaling she swayed, and I had to reach out and steady her. She just blushed deeper and wouldn't meet my eyes. I glanced up at her parents, quirking a brow as if to say 'I told you so', looking for some support. Egred looked confused, but Margaritte had a clear expression of concern on her face now.
"I'm surprised you can still blush with how tight that thing looks," I sighed as the young noblewoman straightened. "Maribelle, as your friend, I'm asking you please go and change."
"I think you should listen to the good Duke, darling," Margaritte added. "You look a little pinched."
Maribelle nodded, blinking a few times.
"Why don't I help you," Margaritte added, stepping over and taking her daughter's arm.
"But I look so pretty," Maribelle said plaintively.
I was struck, then, by just how young Maribelle actually was. It was an easy fact to forget behind all the nobility bluster, but she wasn't actually all that much older than Lissa. This wasn't the usual Maribelle I was used to; this was a young woman simply concerned about looking her best at a social interaction. It was a sobering thought, one I put aside to mull over later.
"You also look like you're about to pass out," I called after them. "And I don't need the rumor mill going nuts if people see me carrying you because you dropped like a stone."
Maribelle sighed and allowed her mother to lead her back towards the staircase, where Eduard was waiting.
"I have taken the liberty of asking miss Ellyn and miss Myrna to attend you in your dressing room, young miss," the butler said, offering her his arm. "Please, allow me to assist you up the stairs."
Egred and I stood in silence for a moment as we watched the trio disappear upstairs, before the older cavalryman turned to me.
"Is… are those things really so dangerous?" he asked me.
"Yes," I sighed, shaking my head. "And I am not looking forward to having this conversation with Sumia and Lissa, later, too. Ugh. Heaven help us all when you people discover radium."
"I don't want to know," Egred chuckled, holding his hands up.
"If it glows green, it's bad," I told him.
"Noted," the older man laughed, shaking his head. "But, thank you for caring about my daughter."
I just grunted in response, in a very masculine fashion.
Egred just laughed again, and slapped me on the back.
The Parliament building in Ylisstol was one of the few important buildings in the city I'd never actually been to before. It was a large, imposing, monolith-like building near the Palace grounds, almost as old as the Palace itself. Apparently, only the Naganite Cathedral, on the opposite side of the Royal Quarter, was older, and was coincidentally the only other of the 'big three' important landmarks I'd not visited after today.
I marched towards the building with my shoulders back and my head held high, doing my best to project confidence I most assuredly wasn't feeling. Behind me marched Gaila, Su'ko and my honor guard, and a coach bearing the heraldry of Themis followed after us, bearing Maribelle and her parents. A trio of mounted Themisian cavalrymen flanked the coach on each side, Duke Egred's own honor guard, but the man had been quietly delighted at the idea of us arriving together. Even if he was kind of confused when I'd refused to even ride a horse.
Already, it appeared, lines were being drawn and sides were being taken.
I'd chosen to politely decline his offer of a ride to the Parliament building, though, claiming that I'd need the walk to keep me awake. It also wasn't exactly far, so it felt a little excessive to ride.
The parliament building itself wasn't very different to the multitude of other buildings around it, just with more guards and people hanging around. It appeared that this was setting up to be the social event of the season, if the way people were dressed and behaving was any indication. To my further dismay, I even spotted vendor stalls selling food and drink, like this was some kind of sporting event or something. It was like they weren't taking this seriously at all.
There was also a clear divide on display between the nobility and the commoners, or at least that's what I assumed those armed guards were there doing, keeping the two crowds separated, anyway. The commoners were watching the nobility like it was a sport, whispering among themselves as they waited to get into the Parliament building, but the nobility seemed to be perfectly content to turn up their noses and ignore the 'rabble'.
I could already feel a migraine coming on.
There were entire parades of the idiots all done up in their finery, all lined up trying to get in at the same time. Carriages with more gold embossed on them than was in my treasury were led by trains of far more horses than as necessary, all wearing fine golden harnesses. Honor guards marched alongside honest-to-god palanquins carried by more armored men; I studied them with the trained eye of someone who had spent nearly a month doing every stupid thing I could think of as stress-testing for my own army's kit, and I could tell than all of the armor on display here was strictly ceremonial. No doubt the weapons were just as bad; I'd be surprised if they were even sharpened.
My party slowed to a halt as I did, Egred's honor guard moving to surround his carriage now as it slowed alongside me. The Duke himself stuck his head out the window, frowning at the crowd.
"We will go around the back to the parking area," the Duke said.
"I'll meet you inside," I told him.
The older man nodded, and then the Themisians were gone, parting the crowd of commoners before them like a bow wave. I was left alone, then, staring down a crowd of people who were beginning to notice that I was here, now, and desperately wishing I'd brought my dog with me.
Or more soldiers.
But I'd make do.
"Gaila," I said over my shoulder. "I'm going to need you to light me on fire."
"Unfortunately, Boss, I need you alive to keep paying me," she chuckled. "Ask Su'ko, maybe she will."
"Su'ko, I'm-" was as far as I got.
"There he is! The Hero of Hagra Field!"
I internally winced as I set my face. The crowd had noticed me wholesale now, and was beginning to gather around us. In one smooth motion, Erutreya and her squad fanned out and created a barrier between myself and the public, but they did nothing for the noise.
"Long live the Exalt!"
"The Immortal General returns!"
"Death to the Valmese invaders!"
"Marry me, Duke Ben!"
"You saved my brother in Plegia, General!"
"Ylisse endures!"
"Bless you, milord! My parents in Baham prosper under your rule!"
"You should be our Exalt, milord!"
"Hail Duke Baham!"
We began to slowly move towards the building, and I nodded greetings and waved in what I hoped was a politely aloof manner. Across the line of guards, I could see the other nobles beginning to whisper among themselves, indicating with derisive giggles and hidden grins at the commotion. Some frowned thoughtfully, or so it appeared, though. Clearly I was doing something here I wasn't fully aware of the ramifications of…
Fuck them; at least I wasn't going to bake out in the sun all day just trying to make an entrance…
"How do we get in?" I asked over my shoulder.
"That door, there," Gaila said.
She had to shout to be heard over the crowd now, and I only caught the general direction of what she was pointing at. If I'd been paying closer attention, I'd have followed the line of her finger more closely and seen the other nobles making their way towards a specific door. Sleep deprivation's a bitch.
I scanned the entrances to the building, catching sight of the familiar figure of Helman at one of them. I tapped Erutreya on the shoulder and nodded to the former Duke. She gave me a curious look, but decided not to argue as we began to make our way to the entrance I'd seen the older man using.
As our destination became clear, the crowd began to part and they started to hush. I was beginning to think I was making some sort of mistake, but then the chanting and cheering started. People raised their arms up, clapping or just pumping their fists in victory.
"Long live Ylisse! Long live Baham!"
This chant began to spread through the commoners, earning some derisive looks from the nobility in attendance, but I ignored it all and angled for the entrance. Inside the shade of the archway, Helman stood beside Jeremiah, the pair watching our entrance with stunned expressions.
"What in Naga's name are you doing, lad?" Helman asked as we approached.
"I have no fucking idea," I admitted. "I'm too tired. You tell me."
"You're going in the commoner's entrance," Gaila said. "I pointed to the other one, Boss."
"Oh god I don't fucking care, let's just go," I sighed. "Get me the hell away from this crowd."
Helman led us inside, and as the cheering of the crowd subsided, I ran a hand down my face.
"Good lord, how do rock-stars deal with that shit?" I muttered.
I glanced down as something brushed my wrist, finding Su'ko looking up at me with a worried expression.
"I'm fine," I promised her softly. "I swear, you're just as bad as Archer is sometimes."
The young ninja gave a small huff, the corner of her mouth quirking upwards ever-so-slightly.
"Damn, Boss," Gaila said, brushing her hair from her face. "I knew you were a big deal, but… I've never seen a crowd cheer like that… ever. Not even for Priam."
"Yeah, that was a surprise to me, too," I admitted.
"I don't see why, after all the good you've done lately," Helman chuckled.
"The standards of 'good' in this country are woefully low," I deadpanned. "Why do the 'nobility' have to treat the 'commoners' like dirt? It doesn't make sense."
"Isn't that the truth," Helman sighed. "Although, you should be aware that by coming in through the entrance for the common folk you've effectively thrown in your lot with them."
"I was unaware there was an 'us' and 'them'," I said darkly.
"You know what I mean," Helman said. "In Ylisse, you are either a Noble, or you are not. Just keep that in mind. You definitely didn't make any new friends among the nobility by doing that. Most of them already see you as an upstart, a jumped-up commoner, title or no."
"However will I sleep at night?" I deadpanned, rolling my eyes.
"You don't sleep at night anyway," Gaila pointed out glibly.
I just blew a raspberry at her over my shoulder.
"That being said," Helman continued with an indulgent grin, "News of your little entrance stunt will spread like wildfire through the Commons. I'd wager you just won a lot of support."
"I'll take it," I sighed. "You said 'most' of the nobility don't like me. What about the rest?"
"The rest?" Helman laughed. "The rest are Egred, Diase, Duke Midland and Exalt Chrom!"
We followed the flow of people through the carefully monitored halls of the Parliament building as we spoke, many among the crowd actively stepping aside and either bowing or saluting when they realized who it was coming up behind them. To my continued irritation, they all looked genuinely happy to see me. This began to wear on my nerves almost immediately, but…
"Ya know, I could get used to this," Gaila commented with a grin.
I ignored her, choosing instead to focus on keeping my breathing steady and my eyes fixed forward. Eventually, we came to a set of heavy oaken double doors on the side of the crowded hallway, flanked by a pair of surprisingly familiar Royal Guards in ceremonial uniforms and breastplates. As soon as the guards spotted me, they snapped to attention.
"You lot take this door," Helman said as we stepped out of the flow of people. "I'll be in the stands, among the representatives from the North. I'd wish you luck, lad, but I think I've already got a pretty good idea of how this will go, and I know you won't need it."
With that, he gave me one last smile and a reassuring pat on the shoulder, and he and Jeremiah threaded their way back into the crowd. I watched him go for a moment, before sighing out my nose and turning to approach the guarded door.
"Heya, boys, long way from the palace, huh?" I said to the two men. "I got a little turned around. How do I get… uh… wherever it is I'm supposed to be going?"
The men, two of Chrom's personal guard, nodded cordially and opened the doors.
"Of course, Your Grace," one of them said. "You take the first staircase on the left. The Exalt's party should be waiting for you at the top."
"Thanks, boys," I said, passing between them.
We followed their directions, and I found the almost deserted hallways beyond the doors almost unsettling after the press of bodies we'd just passed through. The halls here were of a different level of ostentatious, too, being filled with expensive paintings and carpeted with plush rugs that looked suspiciously like trophies taken from Plegia. At the top of the stairs I'd been directed to, though, I breathed a sigh of relief when I immediately recognized a familiar voice.
"Ben!" Chrom called. "You made it! I was starting to think you got lost!"
"I did," I groaned. "This building is a maze."
The Exalt laughed as he strode up to shake my hand, grinning widely.
I cleared my throat, adopting a serious mien for a moment as I bowed formally to Chrom.
"Your Grace, a pleasure to see you in good health," I said archly.
"Indeed, Duke Baham," Chrom returned, just as stiffly. "We are gladdened to see you this day."
I rose back up, and Chrom and I only managed a moment of eye-contact before we both burst into laughter.
We were in a richly appointed waiting area, a small crowd of nobles and important people already assembled, drinking and snacking and gossiping. If the decorations downstairs had been ostentatious, though, the ones up here were borderline gaudy. Everything looked like it cost more than my entire barracks, and I felt woefully out of place among this crowd.
"Make yourself comfortable and mingle for a while," Chrom said after we'd shaken hands. "There's a few people I have to meet before the meeting. Have you seen Duke Egred?"
"He was right behind me," I said. "He shouldn't be long."
Chrom nodded, giving me a brotherly pat on the shoulder, before disappearing back into the crowd.
"You heard the man," I said, turning to the honor guard. "Make yourselves scarce, but don't stray too far. I get the feeling someone's going to try to start something today, and I want to be ready."
"Isn't that a little paranoid?" Gaila asked.
"It's not paranoia when they're actually out to get you. Hey, isn't that a table of expensive liquors over there?" I said, pointing to the other side of the room.
"See ya!" she said, taking off like a shot, her one eye gleaming.
"Erutreya…." I sighed.
"I'll stay on her," the other woman smirked. "Company! Dismissed!"
I then found myself alone with Su'ko, surrounded by a bunch of people I didn't know.
Actually, that wasn't entirely true. I managed to spot a few familiar faces in the crowd, watching as Egred and his party arrived. After only a moment, Maribelle practically launched herself at Lissa, and the two girls immediately engaged Sumia in conversation.
And, of course, both Sumia and Lissa were dressed in corsets, too.
I had to stifle a sigh.
I was really not looking forward to that particular conversation, but at least I could have it with both of them at once.
I glanced up from where Sumia, Lissa and Maribelle were all clucking like ridiculously well-dressed hens, surprised to find Lucina watching the trip intently. Rather than the lace-and-frilled monstrous dresses that seemed to be in vogue in Ylisse at present, Lucina was wearing a mirror of my own pared-down dress uniform. Unlike my comparably slovenly state, though, hers was immaculate. The Parallel Falchion was missing, though, replaced with a silver sword much like the one I was carrying.
I sidled up beside her, and she glanced up, nodding briefly in greeting before going back to watching the other women.
"When did you get here?" I asked her.
"I arrived shortly after the Shepherds," she said. "I said I had to… inspect the area for your Lordship, before you ."
"What, too blue-blooded to arrive with me?" I scoffed.
"That is not why," she said. "This is an important gathering of people. My… Exalt Chrom is vulnerable here. I needed to be here."
"Yeah, I think the Royal Guards tend to disagree, but whatever floats your boat," I shrugged.
"We both saw how well the Royal Guard fared against Validar's assassination attempt," Lucina said softly.
"Point," I sighed. "Plus, you did pretty much just waltz in."
"With your authority," she said.
"Still, the point stands," I muttered.
We lapsed into silence for a time, just people-watching, each of us alone with our thoughts. I glared down the servants that looked like they were about to approach to feed us, and they took the hint and left us alone. Amazingly, I was being snubbed by the local nobles; not surprising after what Helman had explained, but still I'd expected some sort of brown-nosing.
After a few minutes of this silent observation I glanced over to see what Lucina was staring at, and smiled a little.
"You could go over and talk to them, you know," I told her. "Y'all are hardly strangers at this point. I'm sure you could have a conversation without giving yourself away."
Lucina gave me a sideways glance for a moment, before sighing out her nose and going back to watching the other women.
"It is not that," she said softly. "I… bah, it is foolish. Pay me no mind."
"No, no, go on, I like foolish," I chuckled. "Have you met me? I live for foolish."
"You promise not to laugh?" She asked with a light blush.
"If it'll help distract me from this bullshit Senate meeting, I'll promise to dance a jig," I snorted.
Lucina blushed a little deeper before straightening and turning to me.
"Admittedly, I find myself lamenting my lack of feminine curves," she said, her tone stiff.
I looked at her for a moment, and she looked back in silence, waiting for a response, her blush deepening all the while.
"That's it?" I asked.
"I told you it was foolish," Lucina groaned, turning away again.
"That wasn't the kind of foolish I was hoping for," I said slowly. "But I can work with this. Okay. Distraction time."
Lucina glanced back over at me as I stroked my beard, pointedly looking her up and down. She fidgeted a little at the attention.
"Have you ever heard the saying 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder'?" I asked her. "Don't bother answering. It means that beauty is rarely objective. Everyone has their own tastes. Honestly, I have yet to meet anyone that doesn't think you're attractive. Myself included."
"Even though I am flat as a boy?" Lucina scoffed.
"Breasts become a lot less enamoring when you grow up with a pair of your own," I sighed.
I glanced over at Lucina and couldn't help but chuckle at her confused expression.
"I was overweight as a boy and a young man," I explained. "Had an impressive pair of man-boobs until I hit 20 and my shoulders finally came in. As far as I'm concerned, your slim, athletic build is greatly appealing."
"I… you… uh…" Lucina stammered, quickly turning away. "… thank you."
"Actually, now that I think of it, you are actually exactly my type," I went on.
"I… th-thank you," Lucina said again, her voice trembling a little now.
We descended into what I'm sure to Lucina was an awkward silence for a few moments, before I turned to her with a grin.
"So, shot in the dark, but are you busy this weekend?" I asked.
"Ugh," Lucina groaned, throwing her head back. "You are insufferable."
"That's not a no," I grinned.
Maribelle chose this exact moment to come bustling over, and Lucina took her chance to beat a hasty retreat. I watched her go with a satisfied grin, chuckling a little as Maribelle took my arm and began dragging me over to the royals.
"What was that about?" She asked, watching Lucina almost walk into a servant in her haste to retreat.
"Ah, nothing," I grinned. "Just been a while since I messed with our dear Marth."
Maribelle and I glanced up as Burrito and his cronies made their entrance, with all the subtlety of a bunch of strutting peacocks. Each man wore a garish suit in the local style, with a pelt of some hunting trophy wrapped around their bulging torsos, shoulder to hip, and my mood instantly soured.
I frowned a little deeper as I watched the corpulent duke make himself known to his friends and allies, and made a small game of trying to figure out what kind of pelt they were wearing. It was familiar, without a doubt.
Too fine to be wolf or bear, but a little too thick to be any kind of foreign hunting cat…
It almost looked like rabbit fur…
"They wouldn't have dared…" Maribelle gasped next to me, covering her shocked expression with one lace gloved hand. "Oh my goodness! The brutes!"
I turned back to look at the pelts again, a sinking feeling in my stomach as I realized it wasn't rabbit fur.
It was Taguel.
The sick bastards were all wearing Taguel pelts.
Author's Note
Ah-hahahahahahaha! That's one hell of a cliffhanger to leave y'all sitting on! Sorrynotsorry
No, I'm not dead yet, despite the universe's best efforts. I'll spare the details, but 2022 has not been kind to me. I am, however, already working on the next chapter, and will hopefully have a draft of it up for Patrons towards the end of the month. Well, I'll try to, anyway. I'm also about to drop a couple chapters of Self Insert Dark, too, so if you follow that story, look forward to that, too.
Follow me on twitter to find out how you can support my work! -metalloverwrite
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Check it all out, links are all on my bio page! Thanks for reading, and Nagaspeed!