Chapter 6

I glared up at the sky, shaking my head and letting out a sigh as I shielded my eyes from the bright light of the flaming death orb that gave us illumination. There wasn't a cloud in the sky, but it was still mid-spring, so it fortunately wasn't too hot yet. Still, though…

"Fuck the sun, yo," I grumbled.

"Aw, are you grumpy?" Grima teased.

"I'm not a morning person," I grumped.

"It's after noon!" she laughed.

"Still too early. Fuck this noise. I'm going back to being a burrito."

I turned away, making to go back to the inn, but Grima stopped me, laughing and latching onto my arm.

"Oh no you don't!" she giggled. "We just left! And he gave us all that nice wine, too!"

"But it's bright and hot and I don't wanna!" I whined.

Grima just laughed, tugging on my arm again, and I rolled my eyes and resigned myself to the inevitable.

We had decided this morning that going to Plegia was probably the best move. Lucina would be prowling around Ylisse for at least a year now, and I really wanted to avoid that particular conversation if I could. We didn't have any particular plans in mind yet, just go to Plegia and see what happens. We were, in a word, 'winging' it.

After all, as Robin used to say: the more you cram into a plan, the more can go wrong.

The innkeeper had graciously given us an old bag we could carry supplies in, and I'd spent some more of our cash on some travelling essentials and food at the town's only store. Hard rye bread, hard cheese and jerky, enough for a week. It wasn't pretty, or tasty, but there was lots of it, so we wouldn't starve.

Or… I wouldn't starve. We still hadn't established if Grima actually needed to eat or not.

"Why are you so peppy?" I groaned. "It's like someone crammed a rainbow up your ass or something."

"I am excited," Grima huffed. "I've never been on a boat before!"

She was still grinning and wrapped around my arm as we walked, progress significantly slower while she was holding on to me.

"I'm warning you now, if you get seasick like Robin did in that body, you will get very little sympathy from me," I deadpanned.

Grima just huffed again and stuck out her tongue at me, finally dislodging herself from my side but still lingering close.

"Then you will just have to keep me distracted!" she laughed.

"Uh, no, that would imply sympathy," I pointed out, rolling my eyes.

"I'm sure we can figure out something that will… benefit you, too," Grima purred, fluttering her eyelashes over one shoulder before dancing ahead of me.

We had decided on entering Plegia via boat. I had more than enough to book us passage on a cargo ship, or even bribe a patrol frigate for a ride if I had to. We'd probably have to look at doing some work in the desert country, though; a handful of gold coins wouldn't last forever.

Of course, what we were going to do in Plegia was still up in the air. At this point we had agreed that we would go and see how things were shaping up without Grima's influence pushing the war machine forward. If we both decided that it was necessary to intervene, we would, but for the time being we were operating on the plan 'go to Plegia and see what happens'.

To be honest, neither of us particularly wanted to have power or responsibility any more.

I glanced down as Grima drifted back to my side, innocently bumping her shoulder against mine while we walked, the dark god humming quietly to herself with a big grin plastered on her face.

This… this was weird. This was not at all what I was expecting.

I mean, okay, sure, I was expecting Grima to be a little clingy after I metaphorically deflowered her. But this was like a teenager with her first… boyfriend…

"Oh fuck…" I groaned, running a hand down my face.

Grima glanced up at me curiously, clasping her hands behind her as we walked. I ignored her, my thoughts a tempest inside my head.

Well, okay, my thoughts mostly running down to one particular thing…

FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK-

I was Grima's first.

Not just her first lay.

I was literally the first human in millennia to even be nice to her.

And now I was starting to hyperventilate.

"What? Did you leave something behind?" Grima asked.

"No, just… thinking out loud," I said, trying to deflect.

"Copper for your thoughts?" she asked with a small grin.

I saw a flash in her eyes, and realized I had to be careful. I couldn't risk turning her against me and ruining the fragile trust we'd established. I needed to be calm, coherent and most importantly, I needed to be cool.

"Uhhhhhhhhhhhh…"

"You're… regretting this arrangement, aren't you?"

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!

"What!? Of course not!" I said quickly. "I resent these baseless accusations and… okay, it's not so much 'regret' as I'm now beginning to realize the enormity of exactly what has happened in the last forty-eight hours and I'm freaking the fuck out."

"… you're serious?" she asked tentatively.

"Yeah, it's all just kinda hitting me now," I admitted, taking a deep breath.

"You're not lying to me, right?" she asked quietly.

"No, I'm not," I told her with a sideways glance. "I am, however, a stiff breeze from descending into a panic attack."

Then, with perfect goddamn timing, a huge gust of wind blew through the trees and down the road, actually pushing us forward a few paces. Grima actually stopped to look at me expectantly as I turned a withering glare up on the sky. When I didn't descend into a withering blob of anxiety, though, Grima let out a long, relieved breath, chuckling a little.

"Oh, thank the gods, I thought I was the only one who found all of this overwhelming!" she admitted.

I stopped walking, Grima taking a few more steps again before she turned back to look at my confused expression.

"What gods could you, of all… 'people', pray to!?" I asked incredulously.

"Oh, come off it, you know it's a common phrase," she rolled her eyes with a grin.

"So, wait, you're freaking out, too?" I asked, jogging a few steps to catch up with her.

"Yes! It's all insane!" Grima shuddered. "I'm worshipped as a god and even I have no idea what the hell is going on right now!"

"Well… uh… are you… okay with the way things are now?" I asked slowly.

Grima seemed to contemplate this as we began walking again, falling into easy step beside each other.

"I think I am," she nodded with a playful smirk. "You?"

"I mean, I get to fuck a goddess, what more could I possibly want?" I deadpanned, rolling my eyes.

Grima laughed, slapping me on the shoulder with the back of her hand.

"We haven't established that's going to become a regular thing yet," she chuckled.

"Please," I scoffed, rolling my eyes. "You've been clinging to me like a barnacle all morning and giving me the 'come hither' look every time I so much as glance in your direction."

"Maybe I'm just teasing you," Grima purred.

"Uh huh," I said. "Honey, don't lie to me. I know for a fact that the fairer sex enjoys it just as much as men do."

Grima laughed out loud and shook her head, pale white hair the color of snow flicking about with the motion.

Rather than wear it in the usual loose twintails that Robin had uniformly kept her hair up in, Grima hadn't bothered, the long white hair falling loosely about her shoulders. It made her look a lot more mature, in all honesty, and totally clashed with the impish, playful grin she was giving me right now.

I sucked my teeth for a moment before clicking my tongue in annoyance as my libido, so long dormant as I'd grown older, came back in full force. Apparently, my old wounds weren't just healed, I was also actually younger again.

I could work with this…

I stepped closer to Grima, wrapping an arm around her waist and pulling her close as I changed direction, angling for the trees.

"What…?" Grima laughed.

"I'll show you 'what'," I promised.

I glanced back up the road in both directions; no one had followed us. We were just out of sight of the town, so we wouldn't have to be too quiet. The undergrowth around here was pretty dense, this being far enough off the major trade routes to offer plenty of privacy.

All in all, it was pretty perfect.

We probably wouldn't get another chance like this for a while…

"Wait, really?" Grima asked seriously. "In the forest like… like animals?"

"Ha! Dollar for every time I'd heard that before…" I scoffed.

As we stepped off the road and began heading for the trees, I released Grima's waist, taking her by the hand and encouraging her along behind me.

"W-wait!" Grima insisted, far less confidently this time. "What if I hurt you again?"

I actually stopped in my tracks, processing this statement before bursting into laughter. I laughed so hard, in fact, that I dropped her hand and doubled over, Grima just standing there frowning with her arms crossed until I was done.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" I wheezed once I calmed down. "Just… how many times does a woman get dragged off the road by a man with amorous intent and worry she'll be the one hurting him!"

Grima's frown abated somewhat, the corners of her lips quirking up very slightly.

"Okay, okay," I sighed, pushing myself back up. "Okay. While I appreciate your concern, the simple fact that this could, indeed, kill me is sort of a turn-on. Also, one time is hardly a sample size for an experiment. We need to try all kinds of different variables. So. Let's try again."

"Oh yes, talk dirty to me, please," Grima deadpanned, rolling her eyes. "And if I do accidentally kill you?"

"Then I die," I shrugged.

Or, more likely I end up back under that fucking tree outside of Southtown again… I thought with more than a hint of distaste.

"If you die… I'll die with you," Grima said softly, looking down. "I don't want to be alone anymore. I won't."

"Aw, that's sweet," I said, stepping up to her again. "And I mean that's sweet in a really creepy, goth-girl sort of way. But the answer is pretty simple. Just don't kill me and we'll be fine. If you really don't want to, we won't but-"

The rest of my calm assurances were cut off when Grima pretty much threw herself up at me, mashing her lips to mine in a rough, desperate kiss that sent me reeling back a few steps. I automatically leaned into her once I found my footing, and we didn't separate until we were both gasping for breath. Grima looked up at me, her face a delightful shade of pink and her eyes heavy-lidded.

"Of course I want to, you fool," she rasped.

I had to stop for a moment, blinking a few times and drinking the sight in before grinning. I leaned down to give Grima another light kiss, little more than a peck, before stepping back again.

"Then allow me to show you the 'quick and dirty'," I offered. "All we need is a good tree…"

It didn't take us much wandering through the forest to find a decent spot. An old tree, hardy and immovable, created a small shady canopy where only a few sparse weeds grew beneath it. Over a carpet of fallen leaves I shrugged off my coat, dropping it aside (but within easy reach if we needed to spread out something to lay on later) on top of the large pack I was carrying our supplies and stuff in.

Grima, still somewhat hesitant, allowed herself to be pulled over into my arms, smirking a little as I glanced down at her. She leaned up, pressing a light kiss to my lips, before placing a few more on my cheeks and the tip of my nose, before coming back down to my lips for a longer, sweeter one. I reached up, running a hand up through her hair to cradle the back of her head, and Grima deepened the kiss again, pressing herself further into our embrace.

"Are you sure you'll be fine?" she asked breathlessly.

"I ain't dead yet," I scoffed. "But I will probably get hungry afterwards."

"Oh, is that right?" Grima laughed.

"In fact… I'm actually pretty hungry now…" I said, a thoughtful expression warring with the sly grin on my face.

"Then maybe you should eat something?" she suggested.

I made a thoughtful sound before nodding. Grima gave a small yelp, trailing off into a laugh as I pushed her up against the big tree, giving her another hot, deep kiss before I began to trail my lips down her jaw and neck, Grima giving a small sigh every time I found one of her more sensitive spots. As I reached her collarbone, she ground her hips against mine, and I smirked into her shoulder. I brought my hands to the waistband of her pants, making quick work of her belt as I kissed my way back up her neck.

I pulled back and Grima gave me a curious look, her pants only loosely resting on her hips now, staying up only because her back was pressed to the tree.

"Excuse me a moment, please," I smirked, before dropping to my knees.

Grima laughed, her giggled question of "what are you doing?" dying on her lips with a small gasp as I pressed my lips to her exposed stomach. I ran one hand up the smooth lines of her side as I used the other to gently pull down her pants, grinning up at her as I began to trail my lips down from her navel.

I left her pants around her knees; this was supposed to be a 'quick and dirty', after all.

Grinning a little to myself as my lips brushed the top of the plain white panties Grima was wearing, I chose to skip over that area entirely and move my way down to her left thigh instead, kissing and gently sucking the flesh around the top of her thigh and hip as Grima sighed at my ministrations. Her breathing was getting a little heavier, and as I worked my way back to the center, only to again skip across to her right side this time, Grima gave a small, almost imperceptible moan of frustration.

"Something wrong?" I asked into the flesh of her thigh.

"You are a tease," she groaned.

"You love it," I chuckled.

Grima groaned again, the sound almost a growl, as she reached down, grabbing the top of my head and stuffing my face into her crotch. I snorted a quick laugh mostly just to breathe in her concentrated essence, like flowers and dark magic mixed with sweat and another scent that can only be described as 'woman', before my tongue flicked out in a small, teasing lick. A small lick that Grima had clearly not been ready for as she gasped and almost doubled over.

I grinned again, bringing both hands to the waistband of her panties and hooking my fingers in. It would do her no good to make a mess in these things and then have to walk around commando until we could find somewhere to do some laundry, after all. Slowly, teasingly, I pulled them down as Grima's grip relaxed against my head. I buried my nose in the small thatch of white hair that I revealed as I pulled the panties the rest of the way down to her pants, teasing her with my breath as I kept my mouth just shy of her slit.

"Argh, I hate you," Grima moaned. "Whatever you're going to do down there you had best do it soon!"

My gaze flicked back up to her, offering her a lopsided grin as my mouth began to water in anticipation.

"Yes, ma'am."

And with that, I dropped my chin between her thighs, running my tongue up and down both sides of her folds. Grima actually let out a small cry at this, her eyes widening as her mouth went slack. Softly, gently, I began to lave my tongue over her lips, the motions enough to tease with pleasure but not to actually bring her to climax.

If the sounds Grima was making were any indication, she was enjoying herself. Gasps of ragged breath combined with intermittent moans as I found sensitive areas, her hands bracing against the top of my head now as she tried to hold herself up against the tree. I ran my left hand back up her side, helping to prop her against the tree as my right hand brushed through her pubic hair, pulling just enough to stimulate.

It was a game, a fine art, giving a good head job. It's one I'm proud to say I'm fairly skilled at.

I dropped my jaw a little lower, pushing my tongue between her folds and inside of her, Grima giving another cry as my tongue was coated in her nectar, the taste somewhat sweet. Deciding that I'd teased her enough, I moved back up and began to slowly flick at the little nub of nerves at the top of her slit. This didn't get a cry or a moan, but an almost silent gasp as Grima jumped back against the tree. Smirking a little, I brought my right hand back down and around the back of her leg, placing it up and over my shoulder.

Then, I began to flick my tongue against her clit with a purpose.

This time, Grima did scream.

I kept a steady pace, bringing my right hand down to her entrance and beginning to tease her with my fingers as my tongue worked. Already my jaw was getting sore, but I pushed through as Grima's cries became louder and louder. Deciding she was close enough I pushed a finger up into her, followed closely by a second, and combined with the steady ministrations of my tongue this proved to be too much for her.

Grima's hips bucked forward so hard she almost broke my nose as she came, screaming her orgasm at the top of her lungs. Her cries echoed back at us as I pulled my face back and gently lowered her leg, proceeding to wipe my face clean on my sleeve as I grinned up at her. She looked down at me with hazy eyes, blinking a few times as I practically jumped back up. Grima met me halfway with a heavy, deep kiss, her warm tongue soothing my own exhausted one as she began to fumble almost drunkenly at my belt. I helped her out, and soon my member was out and exposed as well. For all of the three seconds it took me to plunge deep inside her, anyway.

Grima let out another cry, still sensitive from my tongue doing god's work, and wrapped her legs around my hips. When she'd freed one of her long, lithe legs from her pants I wasn't sure, but I wasn't complaining as she pulled me in even deeper. Grima had that boneless, strengthless quality to her movements that one gets post-orgasm, so when she wrapped herself around me her head flopped down on my shoulder, her face buried in my collar as she gasped and moaned.

Deciding the time for gentle foreplay was well and truly past, I began to thrust my hips into her, pushing Grima back against the tree. She screamed and turned her head, biting down on my shoulder and drawing a hiss from me as I worked my hips.

I won't lie, I'm not big into the biting thing. I'm not one of those people that gets off on pain; in fact, I find it somewhat distracting.

I pushed Grima back against the tree harder, pistoning into her with almost reckless abandon. If the first act had been solely focused on her pleasure, then this one was all about me. I sped up, moving faster and faster until I could feel the familiar pressure of an approaching orgasm myself.

"Okay… get… get ready to try the… the thingy again…" I said between thrusts, words beginning to fail me.

Grima threw her head back, leaning her shoulders back against the tree now as she pressed her hips towards me. The look she was giving me was one of pure lust, her eyes blank and her mouth lolling open in time with our movements.

I hoped she had understood what I'd meant…

With one final, great push I rammed her back against the tree, pressing my face into her chest and clenching my eyes, trying to both mentally prepare myself for Grima's draining and hold us both up at the same time.

That familiar, sucking sensation came again as I felt something being pulled from me, but it was far less powerful this time, far less intense. Almost as soon as it started it stopped, leaving me tired and satisfied, but not about to drop dead this time.

We leaned against each other and the tree for a few moments, both of us trying to catch our breath. Grima kept me gripped between her legs and inside of her, so I simply left my head pressed to her breast.

"Well, how was that?" I asked, drawing back after an indeterminate amount of time had passed.

Slowly, gingerly, Grima put her legs down, standing on her own again and sliding down the tree a little.

"That was… that was fun," she panted, smiling amorously.

"And you drained me and didn't kill me," I pointed out.

"Yes," she nodded. "Although I did take far less than last time."

"There's probably a balance to be found," I shrugged. "We can figure it out later."

"Mmm, I like that idea," Grima smiled.

Her smile was, if you'll pardon the pun, devilish, and full of promise for all sorts of things to come. Just from that one sloppy, post-coitus smile I almost got hard again, but pushed the thoughts down as I focused instead on how much ground we needed to cover.

"Okay, well, let's get cleaned up and get going," I said, clapping my hands. "Ugh. My knees are killing me right now. Man was not meant to kneel like that for extended periods of time. Well, I wasn't, in any case. Are you gonna make a move or do I have to carry you?"

I bent down to grab my pants where they had fallen around my ankles, looking back up…

"I have a better idea…" Grima purred.

… just in time to see Grima turn and lean against the tree with both hands, presenting her rear to me.

"On second thought, that is a much better idea," I said, letting my pants drop again.

And so it went, our journey south to the coast; walk for a while, quickie in the forest, walk some more, camp for the night and snuggle, repeat. That was really about all we did for a week as we followed the road southwards, until it met a larger trading route.

I managed to barter us passage on a merchant's carriage, and we spent a day sitting on the tailgate of his wagon watching the world pass by, until we came to another fork in the road. The merchant was heading east, so we bid him farewell, a large chunk of our journey made easier now that we'd skipped a whole day of walking.

We made it to the port city of Tawic after only another two days of walking, and quite honestly I was just happy to see civilization again.

Not that camping with a sexed-up death god wasn't fun and all, but we'd run out of wine, and the wine had really been the only thing making the travelling food tolerable.

I was also beginning to feel fairly fatigued, regularly 'feeding' Grima the way I had been. The closest thing I could liken it to was when we had marched on Valm's capital in the closing days of the war, when I was constantly tired and sleep and decent food were a commodity both in short supply. That was the level of fatigue I was dealing with. Still, though, I couldn't help but think it was worth it every time I watched Grima bounce happily along the road beside me.

Unfortunately, there was no bouncing right now. The stink of brine and fish and shit reached us before we even spotted the top of the wall around the city, Grima wrinkling her nose in distaste.

"Ugh, what is that smell?" she asked.

"Dead fish, human waste and salt," I smirked. "The scent of the sea."

"I hate it," Grima said.

"So do I," I shrugged. "It's just incentive to find a ship hella fast and get the hell outta dodge."

"Very hella fast," Grima sulked.

It was kinda cute how she was already beginning to pick up some of my slang. No serious curse words yet, but we'd get there.

Tawic wasn't much to look at. Like most port cities along the southern coast it was mostly warehouses and inns, the majority of the residents' dwellings actually outside the old stone walls. The docks themselves spread out over the water, and if memory served, they could service some pretty decently sized ships. The inner town was all old stone buildings that matched the walls, all coated in algae and old salt, but a lot of the outer town was cheaper lumber, and some of the further buildings even had thatch-work rooves as opposed to the shingles that the ones closer to town had. They must have been a bitch to keep from rotting.

"Not much to look at, but it'll get the job done," I commented as we got closer to the town. "The Plegian merchants that actually are allowed to trade with Ylisse prefer to make trade in these smaller port towns, rather than the bigger ones towards the central coast."

"Well, that doesn't make sense," Grima scoffed. "Wouldn't it be easier to move product in the bigger towns?"

"Sure, but its easier to bribe guards and tax collectors in the smaller ones," I pointed out. "And Tawic is in Duke Beorhito's territory. Means most of the guards here are just as crooked as he is."

Grima frowned, not saying anything more as we entered the outer town. I was worried something might have pissed her off, but when I snuck a glance in her direction, I had to fight not to laugh out loud; she wasn't talking because she was focusing on breathing very shallowly through her mouth, trying not to smell the town.

A few of the townspeople that weren't working at the docks gave us curious glances, but no one actively stopped to stare like they had in Webrook. We were just two more people passing through a port town. Nothing particularly interesting about that. Even if one of those people was a seasoned Ylissean General and war hero and the other was the neighboring country's God. Nope. Nothing interesting at all.

"I think I remember burning this town to the ground," Grima muttered.

"Wow, that's dark," I scoffed.

"I don't remember it stinking so bad, though," she went on.

"Meh, burn it after we find passage," I warned. "A big fire'll make the captains antsy, make them jack their prices up. This is probably gonna take most of my gold, so behave for now."

"Fine," Grima pouted. "But I wish it known that I am not happy!"

"We will be in and out before the stank can even seep into our clothes," I laughed.

Grima mumbled something vaguely threatening, glaring at everything that moved and then also the stuff that didn't just for good measure.

The main gate for the inner city doubled as an inspection station, armed and armored guards marching around, proudly displaying Beorhito's livery. There wasn't a single speck of House Ylisse in this place, which told me someone was probably about to try to rob me in the guise of 'collecting taxes'.

In fact, it looked like someone was already suffering that fate.

"I'm telling you, I'm all paid up! Look, I have the receipt from the Guild House in Themis and everything!"

"Themis is a different region," the guard captain sneered. "You paid their fees, but not ours."

A red-haired woman audibly growled next to her wagon, the draft-horse attached to the front of it whinnying nervously at its master's ire.

I blinked a few times, realizing that the woman was an Anna. One of the travelling peddlers, her clothes well-worn, but still immaculately presented as she argued with the crooked guards. The tarp had been pulled back off her wagon, rather roughly by the looks of things, and her barrels and sacks of goods were on clear display.

"Well, she looks familiar," Grima said, echoing my thoughts.

"An Anna," I muttered back thoughtfully.

We slowed to a stop, watching how the altercation played out.

"It's another three silver for the transport tax through Duke Beorhito's territory," the captain went on. "Plus five more silver for the protection that the Duke's men provide for travelers. Then there's the departure tax-"

"What do you take me for, a novice?!" Anna snapped. "That's all bull! My fees have all been paid, and my taxes were settled by the Guild before I even arrived at Themis! I'm transporting pre-purchased goods, the buyer already paid the taxes!"

"And who is this buyer?" the Captain asked.

Anna hesitated for a moment before striking her family's signature pose, placing her index finger to her chin and giving the guard a wink.

"Now that would be telling," she said in a sing-song voice.

As we watched I caught sight of several more guards slowly closing in on the wagon, the people of the town doing their upmost to ignore the daylight robbery taking place right in front of them.

"What do we do?" Grima asked softly.

"Well, we could use her as a distraction to sneak through. It'd mean we wouldn't have to pay any 'taxes' ourselves," I shrugged.

"I'm sensing a but…" Grima said, grinning up at me.

"Well, it's never a bad thing to have an Anna owe you a favor," I grinned back. "Follow my lead."

I let the years of authority in the military and the duchy rise to the fore, my shoulders back and my head high as I strode boldly towards the checkpoint. Grima smiled, easily keeping pace with me, her gaze curious and excited in equal measure. Because, after all, if this went south the two of us could easily kill every guard and soldier in town. The guards glanced up at my heavy footfalls, a few of them stepping around Anna's cart to halt my advance. I stopped the three of them with a glare and they shrunk back, one even ducking back around to hide behind the cart.

"What is the meaning of this!?" I snapped loudly. "What is taking so long!?"

The Guard Captain and Anna both whirled at my shout, confused expressions on both their faces.

"Why in Naga's name are you wasting all our time like this!?" I continued on, ignoring the little glare from Grima at the mention of her 'rival'. "And, perhaps more importantly, why do you only have one checkpoint open in a busy port town like Tawic!? Are you morons or is this intentional stupidity!? For crying out loud, stamp the woman's papers and wave her through so we can all go about our day!"

Grima latched onto my arm, and for a terrifying moment I thought she was going to blow it, but to my surprise she actually helped.

"Darling, we are going to be late," she pouted. "If we miss this ship my daddy will be ever so mad."

"I know dear, I'm handling it," I promised her.

Our eyes met, and understanding instantly passed between us.

"And you are?" the Captain growled.

"How dare you, sir!" I shouted, feigning offense. "You hold us up like this, then you have the audacity to question our very identities!? What is your name and garrison, Captain!? I'll ensure that the Duke himself hears about this!"

"Now just who do you think-" the captain started.

"This is not a conversation, Captain!" I bellowed, cutting him off.

I stepped right into his space, the man actually retreating a step. This was what I'd been counting on; usually a bully will fold very fast, you just have to keep the pressure on.

"I have a contract to get this young lady back to Saiqat, and for that purpose I have arranged passage with a local ship's captain!" I shouted in the guard's face. "And now you tell me that you won't let me pass because you're more interested in what some peddler is hauling!? I take it, then, that you will be reimbursing me for my fare!?"

"No, wait, hold on," the Captain said, back-pedaling.

"I cannot hold on, man!" I urged, staying in his face. "Can't you see we're in a hurry!? This is utterly life or death! Come on now, hurry up! Chop chop! Why are you still lollygagging!?"

In my peripheral vision I saw one of the other guards stamp Anna's papers and wave her through the checkpoint. Now that their opportunity was gone, clearly the crooked guards just wanted all of this to go away. Anna and I exchanged a glance, her expression carefully blank but her eyes shining with mirth. The Guard Captain saw this, too, and when he looked away, I gave him a hard shove in the shoulder.

"You look at me when I'm talking to you, boy!" I roared. "I swear, no respect in the south! Raven, dear, I'm sorry, but we may have to disappoint your father at this rate!"

"Oh, but daddy gets stabby when he's disappointed," Grima moaned.

The Guard Captain actually paled at Grima's comment, his eyes widening and his lip quivering. He backed into the nearby gate, coming to a stop as I loomed over him, the two of us nose to nose.

"Do you want to be the reason her father gets stabby?" I asked softly.

"By the gods let them through!" the guard captain wailed.

I took a big step back, nodding appreciatively as another guard opened the gate for us. The captain hurried away towards the guardhouse, and I offered Grima my arm. She accepted with a sunny smile at the other guards, all of whom were looking at us with gobsmacked expressions.

"As you were, gentlemen!" I called as we passed through the gate.

Once we were out of visual range, Grima and I ducked into a nearby alley and had to hold each other as we both cracked up laughing.

"I cannot believe that worked!" Grima gasped between peals of laughter.

"I can't believe that worked a second time!" I said, straightening. "Hoo boy, that was fun. Let's get outta here, though, before the Captain decides to grow a pair."

Grima just grinned her toothy smile as she latched back onto my arm. We passed through the uniform streets, taking the smaller, winding back roads between brothels and cheap taverns and eventually came out onto the docks themselves. A fair few ships were moored, sailors loading and unloading cargo as dock workers scurried about. The rest of the city had seemed lethargic and empty, and it was clear to see why just by looking at the controlled chaos of these docks.

Just as I was beginning to think we were home free, though…

"You are either the bravest man I've ever seen, or the stupidest."

I glanced up, coming face to muzzle with a big brown horse. I looked around the creature to where the Anna from before was perched on the lip of her wagon, lazily swinging her legs as she smiled down at us.

"Yeah, I get that a lot," I said with a lopsided grin. "It's a little of both, actually."

The redhead laughed, hopping down from her wagon and bouncing over to us. She held out her hand, smiling brightly.

"I'm Anna," she chirped. "And I really owe you one."

"I'm Ben, this is Raven," I said, introducing us. "And I've dealt with your family before, Anna. You've all always done right by me. Figured I could return the favor."

"Wait, you know about us?" Anna asked, reeling.

"I ran with Anna for a little while," I shrugged.

"No way!? Really!?" Anna squealed. "Anna's my second cousin twice removed on my mom's side! We're practically sisters!"

"She was a real demon to negotiate with!" I laughed. "I'm honestly surprised. She wouldn't have even been slowed down by those jokers."

Anna wilted a little, shifting nervously and kicking at the filthy cobblestones beneath our feet.

"I'm… not as good as the other Annas," she admitted. "I'm still kinda green. Oh! But if you ran with Anna, that means you have to have picked up some of her tricks, right!?"

"If by 'picked up' you mean 'been the victim of', then yeah, sure," I deadpanned, earning a small snicker from Grima.

Anna seemed to just remember that Grima was there, bouncing around me with a wide smile.

"Oh, where are my manners!" she said quickly. "Sorry, Miss Raven, I'm Anna!"

"A pleasure, Anna," Grima smiled back. "And please, just Raven is fine."

I exchanged a glance with Grima and quirked an eyebrow. She nodded minutely, grinning.

"Say, Anna, I have a deal for you," I said slowly.

"I'm listening," she said.

"You're taking these goods to Plegia, right?" I asked quietly.

"I didn't say that," she said defensively.

"No, but you also didn't say where you were taking these," I pointed out. "And Tawic's a hub for traders going one of two places; Plegia or the Southern Islands. If you were going to the Islands, it wouldn't have been a problem, and you probably would have told that guard just to shut him up. But since you didn't say anything…"

"I didn't lie," Anna finished with a wink, "and therefore didn't break my family's rule about never lying. You are good."

"That's what she said," I said automatically.

"It's true, I do say that," Grima sighed.

Anna giggled shaking her head a little.

"Okay, so what's this deal?"

"You take us with you and use your merchant pass to get us into Plegia and I'll teach you some of the dirty tricks your second cousin pulled on me. Sound fun?"

Anna grinned so wide I was worried the top of her head was about to pop off.

"You got a deal, mister."

She stuck out her hand to me, and I grasped it, letting her pump it up and down a few times. And like that, our duo became a trio.

AN: Yes, yes, I forgot to post this on the 14th, I'm an asshole, I know... Ugh. I really suck at this. I have a reminder written up on my whiteboard above my desk now, next to all my bills. So, ya know, the absolute last place I wanna look, lol.

And yes! Dark!Anna joins the team! I actually really enjoyed adding Anna to the roster; it gives a much more grounded feel, having that 'normal person' around to be like "holy shit you two are monsters" and stuff later on.

Also, please excuse the two-year-old sex scene. I swear I've gotten better at them... kinda.

Thanks to MinuteRice for his hard work editing this one! Couldn't do this without you, bro!

Thanks for reading, and Nagaspeed!