Chapter 57: Realisations
Santana's POV
*Thursday 1st February 2024*
Brittany and I are taking the day off from work today since it's a special day. Brittany turns 28 today so I wanted Brittany to have a fun and relaxing day instead of spending it at work being stressed. We're going to spend the first part together with the boys and then later on in the day some of Brittany's family will come over to visit. Right now, I am in the kitchen with my children while Brittany is upstairs, still in bed.
"It's mommy's birthday today so I thought we could make her a special breakfast together" I tell my children.
"Yeah" Jaxon says excitedly.
"Do we think mommy might like pancakes?" I ask my sons.
"Pancakes" Jaxon smiles while clapping his hands together.
"Ok, let's start" I tell my children.
Jaxon helps me make the pancake batter while Xavier sits at the side on his bouncer. Xavier is still a little bit young to do tasks like that at the moment. As soon as the batter is made, I begin making the pancakes. It really doesn't take long to do, so as soon as it's done, I put them onto the plates and put everything onto the table. We're just about to go upstairs to see if Brittany is awake when I hear some movement so the boys and I decide to wait for her in the kitchen.
"Morning" Brittany smiles as she walks into the kitchen.
"Mommy" Jaxon shouts, running towards her.
"Good morning, buddy" Brittany says as she picks up Jaxon. "And good morning to you too" she says as she walks over to Xavier and kisses his head.
"Hey" I smile at my wife.
"Hey" she smiles back.
"Happy birthday" I say as I lean over to kiss my wife.
"Thanks" Brittany smiles at me.
"The boys and I have made breakfast for you" I tell her.
"It looks great, thank you" Brittany says as she sits down at the table with Jaxon. "Are you all going to join me?" she asks.
"Of course" I smile.
"That's good" Brittany smiles back.
"Ok Jax, how about you sit on your own seat so mommy can eat breakfast" I say.
"Ok" Jaxon smiles at me as I lift him from Brittany's knee and place him in his own chair. Brittany then cuts up his pancake for him.
"Can Xavier have a little bit of pancake or is he too young?" Brittany asks me as I sit down at the table with Xavier.
"He can have the tiniest bit I think" I say. We have started feeding him solid foods and it is Brittany's birthday so I'd feel bad leaving Xavier out when we're all eating together.
"Ok" Brittany smiles at me.
"Are you ready to try a little piece of pancake?" I ask Xavier so he giggles at me in response.
"I think you are" Brittany says to Xavier as she cuts up her pancake to give a piece to Xavier.
"Are the pancakes good, Jax?" I ask my oldest son.
"Yeah" Jaxon smiles at me.
Once we all finished eating, we hung out together in the living room while Brittany opened her birthday presents. We then spent a little more time playing with the kids before they both took a nap. Brittany and I are just getting 10 minutes on our own right now to hang out.
"So how is your birthday so far?" I ask my wife.
"It's been really good getting to hang out with you and the boys. It's also been really good to take my mind off work for the day. Usually we're always thinking about work in some way but it's been good today to not think about it at all" Brittany explains.
"Yeah, I get you" I smile.
"It'll also be good later when some of our family come over to visit so we can catch up with them for a minute" she says.
"Yeah, it will be" I nod. "After that though, I want to make you a special dinner. I'm going to do it once everyone leaves and the kids have gone to bed" I smile.
"You don't need to do that" Brittany smiles.
"I want to. I want us to have a nice dinner together and celebrate your birthday. We can light some candles and make it super romantic" I say.
"A date night at home, I like it" Brittany says.
"Exactly and play your cards right and dessert might be consumed upstairs" I smirk.
"I'll be on my best behaviour" Brittany winks at me.
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*Saturday 3rd February 2024*
Brittany and I are going out to dinner with our friends tonight. We wanted to get together to celebrate Brittany's birthday and have some fun. Thursday was nice with our family and Brittany enjoyed her birthday then but it's also going to be nice tonight to celebrate with our friends this time since we didn't see them on Thursday. Jaxon and Xavier are spending the night at Brittany's parents' house so they left a little while ago so Brittany and I are getting ready to go out.
"How do I look?" Brittany asks me.
"You look hot babe, like seriously I could just take you to bed right now" I smirk.
"Don't say things like that to me when we're about to leave the house" she groans playfully.
"It's true though" I shrug.
"Thanks" Brittany says blushing slightly.
"If you want, we could stay back a little longer and have sex" I suggest.
"I don't think that's a good idea considering our friends will be waiting for us at the restaurant. It wouldn't be nice to leave them hanging and us turning up late" she points out.
"It's your birthday dinner so as the guest of honour you have every right to be late or turn up whenever you want" I tell her.
"I suppose that is true" Brittany nods.
"It's not going to happen though, is it?" I ask amused.
"No" Brittany shakes her head.
"It is quite cute how much you like to always be on time for things" I say.
"Thanks" Brittany smiles.
As soon as we're both ready for the night, we head outside and make our way to the restaurant in a cab. Brittany and I thought since it was a celebration tonight then we should both get the chance to have some alcohol so we took a cab instead of one of us driving. The minute we arrive, we go straight inside and join our friends. Despite saying we wouldn't turn up late, we ended up arriving last as usual.
"So, how is everyone?" I ask as we all begin looking at the menus.
"We're good" Quinn smiles.
"Yeah, no complaints here" Tina agrees.
"Yeah, but enough about us, it's all about the birthday girl tonight" Mercedes smiles.
"Thanks guys" Brittany smiles back.
"I think we should all toast to Brittany since we all have our drinks now" Mike states.
"I think we should" I nod in agreement.
"To Brittany, happy birthday" Mike says as he raises his glass in the air.
"To Brittany" I smile as we all toast to my wonderful wife.
"Thanks everyone and thanks for coming tonight. It's going to be a fun night" Brittany says and we all nod in agreement.
"Is everyone ready to order?" I ask my friends after another 5 minutes.
"I don't think Sam has made up his mind yet" Mike points out.
"Yeah, I just don't know what I want to eat" Sam sighs. "Do I want fish, chicken, pasta…"
"He's changed his mind more times than Santana has had her panties on and off this morning and let me tell you, she's done it a lot" Brittany states.
"You're not funny" I say while playfully rolling my eyes.
"I'm not actually joking hon" my wife shrugs.
"Do we even want to know?" Quinn asks.
"Probably not" I laugh.
"Ok, let's swiftly move on then" Tina states.
XXX
After having dinner and some more drinks, we decided to continue the party so we all went back to Mercedes and Sam's place. We really don't get as many nights out to hang out together anymore so when we do we like to make the most of it. We've all got ourselves some drinks now so we're sitting down together, just talking and catching up a bit more.
"Who wants to play a game?" Brittany asks.
"Depends what it is" I tease.
"We could play truth or dare" Sam suggests.
"I'm not sure I really want to play that babe" Mercedes replies.
"We could do never have I ever" Brittany states.
"We always play 'never have I ever' so is there nothing else we could do?" I ask.
"How about spin the bottle then?" Brittany suggests.
"Absolutely not" I shake my head. "I don't want any foreign lips on me and I really don't think you want a divorce which is going to happen if you kiss anyone other than me" I say seriously.
"Ok" Brittany laughs.
"I have to agree with Santana here because we're all in serious relationships that kissing other people wouldn't go down well" Quinn states.
"I actually don't think Brittany was serious, babe" James says amused.
"Yeah, it was a joke because I don't want to kiss anyone but Santana" Brittany smiles at me.
"Let's just play 'I have never' since no one can come up with anything better" Tina states.
"Ok" I nod.
"Who wants to start?" Brittany asks.
"How about Mike starts and then we all just go around the room in a circle?" Sam replies.
"Makes sense" Brittany nods.
"Ok. Never have I ever lied to a partner before" Mike says, starting off the game.
"Lied, like how? Are we talking like something really serious or does even the littlest of things count?" Quinn asks.
"Something serious I mean because I think we've all told a white lie before" Mike shrugs.
"Ok" Quinn nods. Some people take a drink including Mercedes, Sam, Quinn and James. The one that really annoys me though is when Brittany takes a drink.
"Is that so?" I ask my wife with a slight glare on my face.
"It wasn't you, don't panic" Brittany chuckles.
"Are you sure?" I question.
"Of course, I'm sure. I've never seriously lied to you before babe" she assures me.
"Ok, good" I nod. "So, you guys have all been lying to each other" I say as I turn to my friends.
"I wasn't talking about Quinn; it was an ex that I lied to" James tells me.
"Same" Quinn nods.
"Yeah, I wasn't talking about Mercedes here and I don't think she was talking about me either" Sam states.
"It was an ex I lied to as well" Mercedes confirms.
"Ok, let's move on then" I say. "Tina, you're up" I add.
"Never have I ever had sex at work" Tina says.
"Uh…totally" I say before drinking. "Drink up Britt-Britt" I smirk.
"I will" Brittany laughs before taking a sip of wine.
"So, none of the rest of you have ever done it at work?" I ask curiously.
"No, because Mike and I have been together since high school so we don't have many exes. Plus, Mike's never even been in my workplace" Tina shrugs.
"What about the parking lot at work, does that count?" Mike asks.
"Yeah, that can count" I smirk.
"Ok" Mike nods. He doesn't take a drink though.
"Wait so you didn't do it in the parking lot either?" I ask.
"No" Mike shrugs.
"Why did you ask if it counted then?" I say confused.
"Just to fool you" Mike smirks at me.
"Ok" I nod.
"It's sort of the same thing for James and I because we don't really go to each other's workplace" Quinn shrugs.
"Same with Sam and I" Mercedes agrees.
"I guess it's probably different for Santana and I since we work together" Brittany replies.
"Yeah, probably" I agree.
"Ok, I guess I'm next" Quinn states. "Never have I ever had sex in a public bathroom" she says, taking her turn. Brittany and I are the only ones to take a drink though.
"Together?" Mercedes asks.
"Yeah, with each other" Brittany smirks.
"I don't know why I'm surprised because I could have guessed you two would" Quinn says playfully rolling her eyes.
"It gets better though; it was at your wedding" I smirk at Quinn.
"Oh my god" Quinn says disgusted as she rolls her eyes at me.
"Take it as a compliment Quinn because it just means that your wedding was a romantic occasion filled with a lot of love" Brittany says.
"Yeah exactly" I agree with my wife. "I don't think the mood would have been there for us to want to have sex if the wedding wasn't so beautiful and romantic" I add.
"I guess that is a compliment so I'll take it" Quinn smiles.
"Ok James, your turn" I say.
"Never have I ever had a secret bank account that my partner didn't know about" James says. No one drinks except Mike.
"Michael Chang, why would you do that to Tina?" I ask surprised.
"It's not what you think" Mike laughs.
"I guess it's not a secret anymore but why would one have a huge secret like that and hide money from someone they're supposed to trust" Mercedes asks.
"Here's the thing, it was out of good intentions. I opened up a secret account and had been putting money aside so I could buy Tina an awesome engagement ring and then continued to save to put money towards the wedding" Mike shrugs.
"That is really sweet actually" I admit.
"Tina actually knows about it now but it was a secret for a while so that's why I took a drink" Mike explains.
"I guess some secrets are actually ok" Quinn smiles.
"Yeah but at least no one else took a drink for that statement because that secret might not have been as sweet" I say.
"To be honest I could have taken a drink here and you Santana would be none the wiser because you don't deal with finances" Brittany says amused.
"Yeah, I know" I laugh.
"You don't know anything about your finances?" Quinn asks me surprised.
"I mean I know some stuff like the bare minimum but I'm hardly going to marry an accountant and then decide I should do my own finances" I shrug. "She's the professional so she can handle the money and taxes and whatever else" I add.
"I guess that is a fair point" Quinn nods.
"Anyway, let's move on so I think it's your turn Mercedes" Brittany says.
"Ok, never have I ever been arrested" Mercedes says.
"Like by the police?" Brittany asks.
"Yeah, who else?" Mercedes replies amused.
"I mean, Santana put me in handcuffs once and I've pretended to arrest her before" Brittany shrugs.
"We could have guessed it would be something like that" Quinn laughs.
"Ok well I meant never have I ever been arrested by the police before" Mercedes rephrases her question.
"Ok" Brittany nods. No one takes a drink.
"It looks like we've all been good girls and boys" I smile.
"I mean so far but there's still time. Seriously you should be arrested right now Santana because it's a crime to look that sexy" Brittany smirks at me.
"Oh god" Tina says rolling her eyes.
"Thank you, babe" I say as I kiss my wife.
"Sam, please just take your turn before they get even worse" Quinn says.
"I know we can be a little much at times but technically half the time we do it because we know it'll wind you all up which is funny" Brittany shrugs.
"Exactly" I nod. "Even though it is very true" I add.
"Ok, taking my turn now" Sam states. "Never have I ever use my partner's toothbrush before" he says but only Brittany and I drink.
"I know Brittany has definitely used mind before but I'm not sure if I have. I thought I probably have used my wife's before so I drank" I shrug.
"Yeah, I mean we do share a lot of things so I wouldn't be surprised if you did use my toothbrush" Brittany says.
"Yeah" I nod in agreement.
"Ok, it's down to you now Brittany to say something" Mercedes says.
"Never have I ever had a threesome" Brittany says. No one takes a drink besides Sam.
"Wow…you have Sam?" I say surprised.
"Yeah, just after high school" Sam shrugs.
"The less said about that the better" Mercedes points out.
"I'm with you there, I don't like the idea of threesomes either" I state.
"Just out of curiosity, why don't you want to talk about that Mercedes?" Quinn asks.
"It's just a personal thing because it makes me feel weird to think that maybe one girl just isn't enough for some guys or vice versa" Mercedes says.
"One girl is definitely enough for me" Sam says smiling at Mercedes. "I only went along with it because it felt right at the time but it really was awful" he adds.
"I've got to say, it doesn't appeal to me either to have a threesome" James shrugs.
"Yeah, but that's because you're used to boring being married to Quinn and all" I tease my best friend. "Threesomes don't seem a good thing to you because you've never been accustomed to anything other than Quinn so you don't know what else is out there" I add.
"Santana, stop trying to get my husband to try a threesome" Quinn says, shooting me a glare.
"I'm just saying, the poor guy doesn't really have a proper grasp on adventure or excitement because he's never had it with you" I shrug.
"I know what you're trying to imply babe but you're kinda saying the opposite. Surely if James was bored then he'd want to explore a threesome to mix things up" Brittany points out.
"Exactly" James nods. "So, I don't want a threesome because I'm happy with how things are" he says for clarification.
"Good" Quinn smiles at her husband.
"Ok, I guess it's my turn now" I say as I think about something to say. "Never have I ever been in love more than once" I say.
"That's a tricky one because sometimes love is different. I know now what I had with my ex was nothing compared to what I have with Santana but at the time I thought I was in love with Megan" Brittany points out.
"I would say that means you weren't in love so I wouldn't drink if I were you" I say.
"I also wouldn't drink if I were you Brittany but that's for a completely different reason. Even if you have been I wouldn't tell Santana that, look at her face. If you said you had been in love with more than her, I think she might kick your ass" James says amused.
"I can't lie, it would not make me happy if Britt drank right now" I state.
"Well it's a good thing it's only ever been once then my love" Brittany smiles at me.
XXX
After a fun night with our friends, it was time for us all to go home. Brittany and I have just finished getting ready for bed so I'm just getting under covers now. I was finished my nightly routine first so I'm waiting on my wife finishing hers so she can slip into bed with me.
"Man, it has been a fun night but I am super tired now" Brittany states as she gets into bed.
"I hope you're not too tired because I have plans for us" I smirk as I push her onto her back.
"What kind of plans?" she smirks back.
"Sexy plans" I whisper in her ear as my hands rest of her hips.
"I like sexy plans" Brittany tells me as she wraps her arms around me, pulling me against her.
"Me too" I say as I swing my leg over her to straddle her.
"I love how you're being super dominant right now when we both know it's not going to stay like that" Brittany smirks at me.
"Yeah" I laugh. It's no secret that I'm a boss at work but Brittany is the boss in the bedroom.
"Come here" Brittany says as she guides my head down to her so she can kiss me.
"Hey, you brought up a threesome earlier so I was just curious, have you ever wanted one?" I ask my wife.
"Not really, it's not exactly my thing. Before we slept together you knew how nervous I was and that was just with one person and, now we are together then I have absolutely no need for anyone else" Brittany tells me.
"Some people think a threesome would spice things up in the bedroom" I say.
"I know but I don't feel that way. Do you?" she asks me worriedly.
"Not at all" I smile.
"Good" Brittany smiles.
"Could you imagine us in a threesome" I say amused.
"I don't really want to" Brittany says honestly.
"No, I mean like it would not end well. I would probably kill the 3rd person for even looking at you never mind touching you. Like, I do not share when it comes to you" I laugh.
"That's kinda cute" Brittany smiles. "I would probably sit in the corner too embarrassed or scared to do anything while you two were doing goodness knows what" she admits.
"In all seriousness, I just couldn't go through with that. If it's not you then I don't want it. I mean I know you would be there but I just couldn't do anything with anyone else. I just wouldn't be able to get my head in it because I wouldn't find them attractive" I say.
"Yeah, same" Brittany agrees.
"Speaking of spicing thing up though, do you think we need to?" I ask.
"No, do you?" Brittany replies.
"I don't think we need to spice things up either" I shrug. "However, I wouldn't mind if we weren't so rushed sometimes" I add.
"I know but that happens when you have toddlers at home" Brittany says.
"I know" I nod. "It won't happen tonight, though. We have all night on our own" I point out.
"That is true so prepare for an exciting night" Brittany smirks at me as she flips us over and kisses me passionately.
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*Sunday 4th February 2024*
I woke up this morning on my own in my big empty bed. I was expecting Brittany to be lying beside me asleep but she wasn't. I figured she must be downstairs since the kids aren't here right now so I know she wouldn't be in either of their rooms. I go downstairs to see where my wife is but I don't find her right away. I assumed she would be either in the living room or the kitchen but she wasn't in either, she was in our home office.
"Hey" I smile as I walk into the room.
"Morning, honey" Brittany smiles back.
"Are you working?" I ask curiously.
"Not really, I just wanted to check my emails but I wasn't planning on doing much more" she tells me.
"Cool" I smile.
"What are you up to?" Brittany asks me.
"I think I might go for a swim this morning" I point out.
"Sounds like fun, I might do that later" my wife smiles.
"I'll leave you to finish and I'll see you soon" I say before leaning down to kiss her.
"I won't be too long" she tells me and then I leave.
I go upstairs and put my swimwear on before heading back downstairs again. I grab my water bottle and then leave the kitchen, heading outside to the pool. I put my towel down at the side and slowly enter the pool. It's so cold right now but I'm sure I'll warm up once I swim a few laps of the pool. I'm only in the pool for 15 minutes before I see Brittany walk out the door in her bathrobe, towards me.
"Hi" I smile at my wife.
"Hey" Brittany replies, smiling also.
"Do you want to come and join me?" I ask.
"Yes, please" Brittany says as she begins to undress.
"You look so hot right now" I smirk at my wife as she stands in front of me in her swimwear.
"So do you" Brittany says as she dives into the pool and swim towards me.
"I seriously can't keep my hands off you" I say as I wrap my arms around her neck and hoist myself up to wrap my legs around her waist.
"I am so glad we're alone right now" she tells me as she holds me tightly.
"Me too" I smile before leaning in to peck her lips.
"It's just nice to have each other's full attention for a minute and not to like only have one eye on each other and the other on our toddlers as they get up to mischief" Brittany says.
"Yeah" I agree.
"Don't get me wrong, I am missing the kids and hoping they come home soon" she tells me.
"It's ok, I got what you meant honey" I smile as I move from her embrace so we can stand next to each other.
"So, how are you?" Brittany asks as she looks at me.
"I'm good" I laugh.
"I'm being serious. I want to check in with you because we don't always have the time to talk one on one when we're busy with work or the kids" she tells me.
"Well, I am genuinely good because I have you and I have our kids. You all are the most important people in my life so if I ever have a bad day then its easy to forget about because at the end of the day whatever issue I have doesn't matter. You and the kids are the only thing that matters" I say honestly.
"That's sweet" Brittany smiles as she kisses my cheek.
"So, how are you doing at the moment?" I ask my wife.
"I feel the same as you. Sometimes there are a few stresses but as you said, I don't want to dwell on them when you and the boys are more important" she replies.
"Do you mean work stresses?" I ask.
"Yeah" Brittany nods.
"I was thinking of us maybe getting into a better routine these days and going back to work a bit more regularly so the stresses you have might be less now" I say.
"Yeah, it might be an idea" Brittany agrees.
"I don't want us to work crazy hours though because I want to have time with our children. I just think if we get into a better routine then it'll be better all round" I explain.
"It makes sense" she replies.
"There you are" Brittany's mom says as she, the kids and Brittany's dad walk through the gate. "We were wondering where you were because we were knocking on the door for ages but you didn't answer" she adds.
"Sorry, we didn't hear anything out here" I apologise.
"How's things?" Brittany asks as we leave the pool.
"Yeah, everything is good" David smiles.
"Did you miss us?" Brittany asks Jaxon as she scoops him up in her arms.
"Mommy, wet" Jaxon giggles.
"I am a little wet since mommy and I were swimming in the pool" Brittany says.
"Were the boys ok last night?" I ask my mother-in-law.
"Yeah, they were great. They were a little unsettled in the beginning but honestly, it wasn't for long. They were absolutely fine after half an hour or so. I think they're still getting used to being away from you both" Alison says.
"Yeah, it's going to take time I think" I say.
"With a few more sleepovers then I am sure things will be more comfortable for them because they really do like spending time with their grandparents" Brittany says.
"Exactly" I smile.
After spending some time with Brittany's parents and catching up with them, they headed off home. Brittany and I then took the kids inside and gave them something to eat. We're now just deciding what we want to do now since we don't need to work and can give the kids our full attention.
"How about we all go back in the pool and Xavier can experience it for the first time" I say.
"Yeah, I mean he was in the sea a few weeks ago but he's not really had a chance to be in a pool like this" Brittany says.
"Shall we play in the pool for a little while, Jax?" I ask my son.
"Yeah" Jaxon says excitedly.
"Let's get you both upstairs and we'll get you changed into your swimwear" I say as we all make our way upstairs and get the boys changed.
"Are you getting excited too, Xavier" Brittany asks him. He doesn't verbally reply, he just smiles at her.
"I think that means yes" I say smiling at my kids.
"Ok, the pool here we come" Brittany says as we all make our way back downstairs and outside.
"You have to hold onto mommy the whole time, ok?" I tell Jaxon.
"Yes mommy" Jaxon nods.
"Good boy" I say as he and I get into the pool.
"Are you and I ready now?" Brittany says as she kisses Xavier's head.
"He looks so cute right now, getting all excited" I smile.
"I know" Brittany smiles back. "We'll take it slowly, buddy" she says as she gently gets into the water holding onto Xavier tightly.
"What do you think?" I ask Xavier as Brittany slowly gets him used to the water, immersing his bottom half in slowly.
"You like that, don't you" Brittany says amused as Xavier starts splashing us all causing Jaxon to do the same.
"He's just like Jaxon, he loves the water" I say.
"He totally does" Brittany smiles.
"They are both so adorable right now" I say.
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*Thursday 8th February 2024*
The kids are spending the day with Jessica so Brittany and I are at work right now. We figured we might as well do some work while we had the time and it'll let us get caught up on some stuff we don't always have time to do when we're with the boys. Currently I'm taking a 5-minute break because my wife has just kindly brought me a cup of coffee. I'm just beginning to sip my midday beverage when my phone pings with a text.
"Who will that be" I say confused as I pick up my phone.
"Not me, I'm right here baby" Brittany smiles.
"Yeah" I smile back.
I quickly pull out my phone and unlock it to see why it pinged. I notice I have a text so I open it up to see what's going on. It's a text from Quinn which I find a little weird because I thought she was working today and she doesn't normally use her phone at work unless it's for professional reasons.
From Quinn: I know you're probably busy right now but can we talk?
To Quinn: I'm at work right now but I'll call you if you want or we can catch up when I'm finished this afternoon
From Quinn: no, I need to talk in person. I need my best friend, Santana. Please
To Quinn: ok. Are you home?
From Quinn: not yet but I will be in 5 minutes
To Quinn: I'll come over in 5 minutes
From Quinn: ok, thanks
"Honey, I know we're working right now but I need to stop and go over to Quinn's place. She's text me asking if we can talk. I suggested I call her now or we'll catch up after work but her texts sound a little urgent and honestly, I'm a little worried so I don't think it can wait" I say.
"That's ok, you do what you need to do" Brittany nods. "You know your best friend so you know when something isn't right so don't worry about work or the kids. I've got this" she adds.
"Thank you" I say as I get up from my desk and grab my purse.
"If you need me at all then just call" Brittany says.
"I will" I nod. "I'll update you once I know what's going on but I really need to go now" I say as I kiss my wife's cheek and then head for the door.
Once I leave the building, I hurriedly walk over to my car and get inside, before speeding off. I'm not going to lie; I feel a little weird right now because I don't know what's going on or how to feel. I'm worried because Quinn's texts sounded like she was upset but at the same time, it's not the same worry I would get had I been rushing to a hospital because someone was hurt. Quinn must be ok physically in a sense so that is somewhat comforting but like I say, I'm still scared because I don't know what is wrong. As soon as I arrive at Quinn's place, I notice the front door unlocked so I let myself in and go to find where my best friend is in the house.
"Hey, what's going on?" I ask as I find my best friend in the living room.
"Santana…" is all she says before bursting into tears.
"Oh my god, what's happened?" I ask worriedly as I run over to her. She just mumbles in response. "Honey, I don't know what you're saying" I say softly as I sit down next to her and hug her tightly.
"I can't" Quinn says in floods of tears.
"You can't, what?" I ask confused. She just mumbles again. "It's ok, take a minute and then we can talk" I tell her.
Quinn just nods in response so we spend the next few minutes not saying anything. I continue to comfort my best friend as the tears continue to flow down her cheeks. I really hate seeing her this upset and it's really worrying me not knowing what's going on. I have to give her a minute though until she calms down a little before we can talk and I can find out what's going on. When the crying does die down a little, I pull away slightly to look at Quinn.
"Honey, what's going on?" I ask worriedly.
"I had a doctor's appointment recently and then another this morning" she says as she tries to regain some composure to talk.
"Ok" I nod, allowing her to continue.
"The first one was last week and it was just supposed to be a routine check-up with my gynaecologist that I regularly have so while I was there, I asked her about getting pregnant and stuff since James and I have been trying for a little while" she says.
"Ok, fair enough" I say.
"She then did a few more tests so the appointment this morning was to go through the results of the tests" Quinn explains.
"Oh, ok" I say, starting to get a little worried about where this is going.
"I can't have children, Santana" Quinn says, bursting into tears again.
"Honey, come here. I've got you" I say as I hold her tightly in my arms as she cries her heart out.
I don't like talking about feelings and sometimes I do get uncomfortable with people being so emotional but when your best friend pours her heart out like that, you have to forget about yourself. I just need to be here for Quinn right now and understand what's going on so I can help her through this. I don't know what any of this means right now but whatever happens, I am going to be here for her and to support her through this however I can.
"So…where is James?" I ask as Quinn gathers herself together somewhat.
"He's at work" Quinn replies.
"Why?" I ask confused. I really thought her husband might be here right now given what she's saying.
"What do you mean why?" Quinn replies confused.
"I thought he would be here supporting you as well right now. I mean what did he say about everything. I mean how is he feeling about this?" I ask.
"He doesn't know, I went alone to the doctor because I honestly thought everything would be fine so no reason for him to come with me and panic over nothing" Quinn states.
"Oh, ok" I say in realisation.
"Did you think he just left me feeling like this on my own?" she asks.
"Yes and no" I admit. "He wasn't here so I'm sorry but I did think he had gone to work knowing how you felt. At the same time though, I didn't think he was the type of guy to do that so I was confused" I add.
"Yeah, he really doesn't know. In fact, I don't even know how to tell him this. He wants kids as much as I do so how on earth do you tell your husband you're the reason he'll never have a family" Quinn sighs.
"I know it's going to be hard but he loves you so he'll be there for you" I tell her.
"I really thought all this time I was just really good regarding birth control but apparently I just never got pregnant because it's not possible" she states.
"Let's just talk this through for a second. What exactly did the doctor say?" I ask. I mean is it a definite no or are her chances of a natural pregnancy just a lot lower?
"The best way the doctor could describe it was a hostile uterus but apparently, they don't use that terminology anymore. Basically, I think what she means is the environment needed for the sperm to travel isn't friendly, meaning it can never get far enough to fuse with the egg" Quinn explains.
"Ok, I think I see what you're saying" I nod in understanding.
"I mean I still get periods and stuff so it's not a complete no but there's a high possibility I'll never get pregnant because my body doesn't function appropriately for a pregnancy to develop" she says, as tears begin escaping again.
"Oh, honey" I say sadly as I hug her tightly.
"I think I just need some time to process this now. I just had to tell someone and let my emotions out before I could bring myself to tell James" Quinn says.
"That's ok, I'm always here for whatever you need" I assure her.
"Thanks" she replies.
"When is James due home?" I ask after a few minutes of silence.
"Really soon so perhaps I should tidy myself up and wipe my face. I must look a complete mess with the tears ruining my makeup" Quinn states.
"Maybe a little bit" I tease, trying to lighten the mood. "Seriously though, this is going to be ok" I assure her.
"I know, I just need to tell James now and take it from there" she says.
"Do you want me to be here when you do for support?" I ask.
"No, it's ok. I appreciate the support but I think I need to tell James alone because he might be upset and not really want to be around other people" Quinn tells me.
"Ok, fair enough. I will go now but please call me if you need anything" I say.
"I will and thank you, Santana" Quinn says, giving me an appreciative smile.
"It's ok, it's what best friends are for" I smile back before hugging my best friend.
Once we say our goodbyes, I leave and head out to my car. I take a second before driving off home because I needed that time to just process things. I know it affects Quinn way more than me but it was a bit of a shock to me. I never expected this was going to happen when I got Quinn's text earlier. I obviously knew something was wrong but I really didn't think she was going to tell me what she did because I wasn't aware she had been to the doctor beforehand.
"Hi" I say quietly as I walk into my home.
"Hey, how's Quinn" Brittany asks concerned as she meets me in the hallway.
"She…god even I'm getting upset…she…"
"What's going on?" my wife asks worriedly as we walk to the living room.
"She can't have children" I say as tears start flooding down my cheeks. "She's my best friend Brittany and seeing her so upset makes me so upset" I say as we sit down.
"I know" Brittany says, hugging me tightly.
"I never thought in a million years this would be a thing. Like we've always said since we were younger that we wanted marriage and kids and there was never any reason before now why that wouldn't happen for either of us. Obviously, we know I'm ok since you and I have children but we also didn't have any reason to think it wouldn't be the same for Quinn" I state.
"So, what happened, has she seen a doctor?" Brittany asks.
"Yeah, she's had some tests recently just because her and James have been trying for a while now to get pregnant. She only got some of the results today and the doctor said there's a high chance she won't get pregnant" I reply.
"God, she must have got a shock" Brittany says sadly.
"She did and I did too when she told me" I sigh. "I just don't know what to do now because she's my best friend and I hate to see something she wants so badly not happen" I say as the tears roll down my cheeks again.
"We'll figure it out and we'll be there for Quinn and James" Brittany assures me.
"Are you both ok?" Jessica asks concerned, walking into the room.
"Yeah, we will be" Brittany says, smiling politely at Jessica.
"I'm just getting a little upset because Quinn has just found out something a little upsetting and seeing my best friend crying makes me cry" I explain.
"Ok, well if you need anything just give me a shout. I only came through because I heard crying and got a little panicked" Jessica says.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you. I just couldn't hold back my emotions. I'll be fine in a second though" I assure her.
"Ok" Jessica smiles and then leaves again.
00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000
*Saturday 10th February 2024*
I'm meeting up with Quinn today to catch up. She was obviously quite emotional the other day so I didn't want to push things too much so I'm going to see how she is doing today and maybe we can talk the situation through again. I'm hoping she can tell me a bit more about what the doctor said and then maybe we can do some of our own research. There might be things out there that could be done in the event Quinn can't get pregnant naturally.
"Hey" I smile as Quinn opens the door.
"Hey" she replies back.
"How are you?" I ask as we make our way to the living room.
"I'm not going to lie, I'm not totally ok" Quinn shrugs.
"How did James take it when you told him?" I ask curiously.
"He took it well actually. I am beginning to wonder if it's one of those things where he is being strong for me but secretly just as sad. He said he'll do whatever I want to do regarding the situation" Quinn replies.
"You two will figure this out, I know you will" I say reassuringly.
"I just worry though because James can have children, it's me that's the problem so what if that is something he decides he needs. What if James realises he wants a child of his own?" Quinn sighs.
"Quinn, he loves you. He won't leave you" I state.
"I'm not saying that, I'm just saying that he might want a child that's biologically his which is something I might not be able to live with. I know it sounds selfish but if I can't have his children then I'm not sure I want another woman to do it even if it's for us" she tells me.
"I understand, I really do. That was my thoughts before we had Jaxon when I wasn't sure if we were going to get pregnant" I admit.
"It would just be too hard" Quinn states.
"So, is surrogacy an option then?" I ask.
"Yeah, the doctor said that traditional surrogacy is an option and gestational surrogacy may work too" she replies.
"Well, that's positive" I tell her. "You could still have your own baby biologically through gestational surrogacy" I say.
"Yeah, if I was a millionaire" Quinn sighs.
"I know IVF costs a lot but surely we could figure something out when this is something so important. Your family could help or even me and our other friends could pitch in" I say.
"I couldn't ask you all to do that" Quinn shakes her head.
"Yes, you could. Quinn this isn't something we'd take lightly. We're talking about something important so we'd all want to help you. It's not like you'd be pissing all the money away on something stupid" I tell her.
"I just don't know if I'd feel comfortable with it" Quinn sighs.
"Put your pride aside Q because honestly, this is something that could change your life. If it's the difference between becoming a mom or not then we're doing this for you. If this is a way to give you something you've always dreamed of then we're doing it. I'm a mom now and it's one of the best feelings in the world so if it's something you want then we'll all help" I assure her.
"I really appreciate that Santana but surrogacy is not cheap at all. We're not talking about a few dollars, it's much much more. It's not just like a medical procedure; we need to factor in the money for finding the right surrogate and paying them for what they're doing for us" she explains.
"Maybe we cut out the middle man and I could be your surrogate then" I suggest.
"Absolutely not. I would never ask you to do that for me or ask that of Brittany" Quinn shakes her head.
"You didn't ask me, I offered" I shrug.
"That is a big deal though, Santana" Quinn states. "Again, you're not just doing me some small favour. Being a surrogate for anyone never mind your best friend is a very big deal" she adds.
"I don't mean it would be my baby with James, I mean I could be a surrogate for you and James. I could just be the host but it'd be your egg" I tell her.
"I knew what you meant but I still don't know if that's a good idea" Quinn says hesitantly. "It really would be a lot to ask of you and Brittany as I say" she adds.
"I think Brittany would be ok since I'm helping my best friend" I shrug.
"I think watching her wife go through a pregnancy knowing it's not her baby would be hard for her. In fact, it'd be hard for you too" Quinn points out.
"Yeah, it won't be easy but it's better than not doing something at all. We could try this because I'd rather this than not have you have a chance of becoming a mother" I tell her.
"You need to talk to Brittany about this before getting my hopes up, Santana" Quinn says seriously.
"Wait…does that mean you would let me do this for you?" I ask excitedly.
"I'm not going to lie, the more we talk about things the more I am getting my hopes up about the possibility of me still getting to become a mother so I guess I could warm to this situation" she admits.
"This could really work for you so please let me do it" I say.
"Honey, you need to talk to your wife about this first. I can't get super excited about this until I know it's a sure thing. Brittany might not want you to do this and I would totally get that so please, talk to her before saying anything else to me" Quinn says.
"Ok but all going well, I am 100% in so if Brittany says she's comfortable enough with this then I'm doing it Quinn" I smile.
"Ok" Quinn nods.
That's it for the chapter. Let me know what you think.
