It was a beautiful morning in Central City. Birds flit through the sky as the camera pans across the urban city-scape, drifting over towards a more residential part of town. Eventually it floats down and lands in front of a specific house. What does this house look like? I'm glad you asked. It looked like a mix between the Addams Family's mansion and a modest bungalow. We slowly zoom in past the 12 foot tall Home Depot skeleton in the yard and into the dining room window, which doesn't shatter thanks to storytelling magic. Inside, a blue hedgehog is arguing with his parents.
"Mom, I'm not wearing this! It doesn't suit me at all!" he said, throwing a long black coat with ornate designs on the buttons on the ground. "What did you do with my letterman jacket?"
"Sonic, I don't understand this need to rebel," said his mom. Not that you asked, but she was dressed in a style reminiscent of Morticia Addams. "Your father and I only want what's best for you!"
"That's right, son," said his dad, who was wearing tight leather pants, a poofy white shirt, a black leather vest, an ascot, and a top hat. "We want you to have the teen years we never got to experience."
Sonic wasn't listening. He had started digging through the closet, throwing out multiple articles of clothing in varying shades of black. Finally, he'd found what he was looking for; his letter jacket. He put it on, and his mother put her head in her hands. His dad flared up, angry at the sight of the overpriced "suede" jacket with "leather" sleeves.
"Sonic, we've given you a lot of slack. You wanted to wear polo shirts, and we allowed it. You wanted khaki cargo shorts, and we let it slide. But no son of mine will leave the house wearing something as degenerate as that… that… SCHOOL SPIRIT BULLSHIT!"
"I'll be home late, I've got tryouts this afternoon," Sonic said, completely ignoring his parents. He swung his plain canvas bag over his shoulder and grabbed his unassuming lunch box before running out the door.
"I don't know what we're going to do with him, dear," said his mom.
"I don't either, but I know one thing," said his dad. "If I'm the undead air traffic controller around here, he's GROUNDED!"
We cut now to Sonic boarding the bus that took him to school. As he walked down the aisle, he caught the eye of a pink hedgehog who was waving so vigorously at him that she was nearly achieving lift off.
"SONICKU!" she yelled exuberantly, putting her whole self into the word as if she was a voice actor reading a Sonic the Hedgehog fanfiction on Twitch. Sonic gave a polite smile and wave before sitting in the seat next to her.
"Hey, Amy! You're sure chipper this morning!" Sonic said. "Did you have a beaver for breakfast?"
"Of course not!" Amy giggled. "I'm just happy to see you, Sonicku!"
"Why do you insist on using the Japanese spelling slash pronunciation of my name?"
"Because I LOVE it, Sonicku! It's my favorite word! I'm so grateful that I get to say Sonicku!"
"That's fair. I know some people think it's annoying, but I'm glad you get so much joy out of it!" Sonic said. He leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes, letting out a deep sigh. Amy, as obsessed with the word 'Sonicku' as she was, didn't miss this.
"Did you have another fight with them this morning, Sonicku?" she asked. Sonic nodded.
"They're just being so unfair," he said. "I understand that they love gothic fashion and witchy culture, but I wish they'd let me find my own way. Just because it's different from what they want for me doesn't mean it's bad."
Amy nodded Sonicku-ly. "Sonicku," she began. "I really think you need to have a word with the school counselor about this. She really helped me when my parents confronted me about my weeb shit."
"Maybe you're right," said Sonic. "I'll think about it." Amy leaned forward to look at him, thinking about saying something, before deciding to say something else. What that first something was, you'll never know.
"Are you excited for the track team tryouts today, Sonicku?" she asked. Sonic waited a few seconds before deciding that it was better to respond to her than ignore her.
"Yeah, I am," he said. "I know that no one in the school can compete with me when it comes to going fast!"
"Is dat so?" said a poorly performed Idris Elba-esque voice behind him. Sonic turned to see Knuckles cockily leaning over the back of his seat. "I 'ear dat dere is a new guy star'in today tha' is blazin' fast!"
"There's no way he could be faster than Sonicku!" said Amy, once again using her favorite form of the word 'Sonic.'
"Yeah!" said Sonic, his tone cockier than a Roman bath house. "I'm the fastest thing alive! It's, like, my one thing!"
"Yeah, wehw…" said Knuckles, conspiratorially looking to his left and right before leaning in closer. "Dey say dis new bloke 'as dese special shoes, see? 'E can reach dizzying speeds!"
"I'll be the judge of that!" said Sonic. Knuckles grinned.
"'At's da spirit!" he said, giving his blue buddy a gentle punch on the jaw. "You'll show 'im wha's wha!"
Amy nodded, looking at her friends. The camera zooms in between her eyes and into her thoughts. Inside, an Amy in a straight jacket rocked back and forth on the floor, saying "Sonicku, Sonicku, Sonicku, Sonicku, Sonicku, Sonicku, Sonicku, Sonicku" over and over with varying pitches and tones.
We zoom out, and drift outside of the bus as it carries Sonic and the rest of the students that it had picked up along its route to school. Unfortunately, that's where we're going, and now we have to run behind the bus like we're the high school nerd.
By the time we make it to Central City Central sChool, it's already second period. Luckily, nothing important to the story happened, and we can join Sonic on his way to chemistry. Ooooh, too late, he's already in there! Guess we have to sit in the back. PSYCH! We're an invisible camera, we can sit anywhere we want!
The bell rang and Sonic took his seat, kicking his feet up on the desk.
"Ah, alright class," said their teacher, Mr. White. "Today, we have a new student joining us. They're out in the hall, so let's give them a warm welcome! Come on in, Shadow!" Mr. White started applauding, but no one in the class joined him. In the back, we hear someone blow and pop a bubble of gum. Through the door walked Shadow.
Sonic sat up to get a look at the new kid, but quickly was disappointed. They were slightly built and androgynously dressed. High waisted pants accentuated their hips, and a shortly cropped halter top showed the broadness of their shoulders. Their brilliant red eyes were shadowed in a color that was an exact match, and gold piercings shone from their lip, nose, and eyebrow.
"Welcome, Shadow," said Mr. White before doubling over and coughing into a handkerchief. After standing up, he continued. "I believe that there's a vacant seat next to Sonic, he's the blue pretty boy over there."
Sonic slid down in his seat, trying to avoid making eye contact. Great, he thought. Just great. I can't even escape this goth stuff at school. Shadow walked over saucily and looked at Sonic expectantly.
"Could you move your bag?" Shadow asked. Sonic rolled his eyes and gave an exaggerated sigh before doing as he was asked. "Thank you."
"Don't mention it," said Sonic.
"Alright class, now to the fun part," said Mr. White. "Today we're starting our long running experiment. We're going to be making 'candy.' I've posted a list of materials on the board, you and your table partner can work together to gather them. Instructions are on the class website. Shadow, if you need help finding anything, ask Sonic."
"Understood," said Shadow.
The class got to work relatively quickly. After gathering their materials, Sonic and Shadow were at their station and reading the instructions.
"So the first thing we need is the methylene blue," said Sonic, all business. "Mr. White keeps a 55 gallon drum of it in the storage closet. I'll get it." He walked over to the storage closet, following through on his promise to get the methylene blue. While he was waiting his turn to collect some from the barrel, someone tapped him on the shoulder.
"Guess who, bro?"
"Hey Tails, how's it going?" asked Sonic.
"Aw, no fair! You cheated!" said Tails.
"I didn't, it's just that you've got soft hands, so I knew it was you."
"Wait a minute, I'm wearing gloves!" exclaimed Tails. "There's no way you could feel how soft my hands are through them!"
"They're really, really soft," said Sonic, and Tails bought it like your single aunt buys lottery tickets.
"I guess that's true," he said. "So, what's the new guy like?"
"I don't know, and I don't care," Sonic said flatly. "Probably just someone like my parents, and I don't really want anything to do with them."
"What a narrative coincidence that they sat next to you, then," said Tails. "Some might even call it ironic."
"Well, I wouldn't. I'd call it literally the worst experience of my life. I've had a pretty good life, so there's not a lot of competition." Sonic grabbed his sample of methylene blue. "Well, guess I'd best be hittin' the dusty trail!"
"Good luck, Sonic!" said Tails. "Stay safe from those scary goth boys!"