SEONG0X-0.0.2A/MMED.1.413
Author's Note: Not my original story, just a touch up of a tale I liked, original by Zoeyotgw anglozellig on X/Twitter
"Petty excuse for a pirate captain! You cannot defeat me!"
Dull thunks rang out as wood met plastic, cheap Christmas gifts clashing at the hands of two massive dorks.
"Hah! I'd like to see you back those words up."
Dread Pirate Kiki, scourge of the swimming pool, pilferer of MP3's, blocked a swing with her plastic cutlass, and swept her legs at Mymy's feet. Her foe stumbled, nearly falling into a bush. The feared captain raised her blade, pointed at the small girl's neck. "Surrender."
Commodore Mymy gulped. She'd been backed into a corner, yet still she glared into her nemesis's eyes, defiant in the face of such odds. "Or what?" Smiling, not letting any of her fears bubble to the surface.
Kiki stared for a few seconds. "Uhh..." Confidence slipped into uncertainty. She hadn't thought this far ahead, and her eyes danced around for a moment as she thought up a suitable response. "I'll take your hat?"
Mymy's hands shot up to her replica navy hat. "Never!" And charged, swinging her wooden sword ruthlessly. Red flashed in her vision, pulled back into reality by a loud cry. She glanced down to see Kiki on the ground, hand to mouth. Blood dripped between her index and middle finger. Mymy raised an eyebrow. "Gonna... surrender?"
Kiki just stared up at her, pained tears welling up. She moved her hand away, revealing her split bottom lip. "Ow..."
Such a pathetic display left a sour taste - that definitely wasn't guilt - in Mymy's mouth. She stepped forward, a normally small girl looming over her enemy, and pressed her sword against the busted lip, letting a little bit of blood drip onto it. Kiki immediately averted her gaze. "It appears I've beaten you, barbaric pirate. Do you have any idea what we do to lowlifes like you?" She raised the sword to her mouth, licking Kiki's blood off. She went on about Kiki's future of torture, but Kiki heard nothing. Her brain had fried at her friend's whole blood-licking show. Was that... an indirect kiss? She wondered for a moment before crying, "Spare me, captain!"
Mymy stopped speaking, and gave Kiki a smug side-eye. "Oh? Do speak, criminal."
Kiki, now forgetting the searing pain on her lip, put her hands together and gave Mymy her best puppy eyes. "Spare me, please... I beg you; I'll do anything!"
Mymy's expression warped from surprised to a twisted grin. "Anything?"
Kiki happily did her friend's homework for a fortnight.