FOREWORD

Last year, as one of my Halloween oneshots, I did a story (Boîte de Conserve, a French term for canned food) where Adam Smasher of Cyberpunk 2077 fame ends up in hell, and has his brain cooked and eaten by Hannibal Lecter, with Rebecca from the Edgerunners anime as a guest. Given how vile Adam Smasher is, I decided to revisit him getting a bad fate, as this seems to have been a theme of this year's Halloween oneshots, what with Vermiform Ceremorphosis giving Shinji Matou from the Nasuverse an Illthid-style makeover, and Karma for a Toad, Food for a Xenomorph having Dolores Umbridge from the Potterverse get the Facehugger treatment.

But what to do with Smasher? When the Edgerunners anime got a category here on this website, I changed to being an Edgerunners crossover, leaving Cyberpunk 2077 free for me to use for a story. I considered some stories, but eventually, given the contempt Smasher shows towards meat, why not have him face a foe that is not only almost nothing but organic material, but has a hunger for his last remaining flesh, namely, his brain? Not Hannibal Lecter…but rather, a Symbiote from the Marvel comics universe. In other words, what if the Venom Symbiote ended up in Cyberpunk 2077?

Anyway, time for the usual disclaimers. First, there will be spoilers, as well as quite a bit of horror and violence. Plus, Adam Smasher is a misogynist as well as a misanthrope, so, fair warning.

There's also major spoilers for Cyberpunk 2077 and Cyberpunk: Edgerunners. Again, fair warning.

Finally, the following is a fan-based work. Spider-Man and Cyberpunk 2077 are the properties of their respective owners. Please support the official release. Otherwise, Venom will eat your brains...

V STANDS FOR VENOM

Adam Smasher was not in a good mood. True, it was rare that he truly was in a good mood, unless he was in the middle of slaughtering people. But he wasn't usually in this aggravated a mood, where he felt intense frustration.

It had started after those foolish lumps of meat broke into Arasaka Tower and stole the Relic. He'd caught a glimpse of them during their getaway. That brat Yorinobu blamed them for his father's death. Smasher knew otherwise, but thought it would be at least amusing or interesting to let him continue playing out that little farce.

Smasher would not admit it to anyone, but ennui was something of a problem for him. He would like nothing more than to fight a challenging opponent, and slaughter them. This wasn't to say that he didn't enjoy taking apart other meatsacks, true. He enjoyed trampling the weak as much as he would enjoy a challenge. The closest he'd got recently was that scrappy little brat, David something or other.

In any case, he'd kept an ear out for any news of those thieves. One of them, some ex-Valentino called Jackie Welles, flatlined as a result of injuries sustained during the heist. The other, some up-and-coming ex-Arasaka punk known only as 'V' (pretentious, much?), ended up being dumped in…well, a dump. Takemura had been sent to retrieve him, only for Yorinobu to betray him.

Still, ever since the robbery and Saburo's death at the (literal) hands of his son, Smasher had heard some disturbing rumours on the Night City grapevine. Not truly concerning, but there were claims of a creature in black that went around, tearing those meatsacks apart, even eating their brains. It could not be killed by gunshots. Rumours claimed that fire and loud noises could help, but Smasher put little stock in them, especially as those rumours didn't help the victims. The only clues to those were apparently snatches of surveillance footage on the people attacked by them. All gangoons and gonks who nobody would miss.

But now, someone had had the audacity to storm Arasaka Tower, well, more than one person, anyway. They'd zeroed the lights, and the cannon fodder meat had been zeroed in their own turn. Eventually, Yorinobu ordered Smasher to deal with the intruders.

Except he was having a hard time doing so. Even with his sensors, he found it hard to target the…well, targets. There were two at least. And they seemed nearly invisible to his infra-red sensors.

It was a cat and mouse game, but for once, Smasher was getting the feeling that he was the mouse. It was a feeling he didn't enjoy one bit. It eroded his feelings of strength, of invincibility.

Increasingly frustrated, he roared into the darkness-filled room, "STOP HIDING AND FACE ME, YOU COWARDLY LUMPS OF MEAT!" He then began firing indiscriminately, not in the hope of hitting his targets, but hoping that the burning wreckage might help illuminate the room somewhat better.

Eerie chuckles echoed out of the darkness. "Cowardly?" hissed a warped, flanging voice. But that didn't seem to be a voice synthesiser causing it. No, the weird effect seemed to be more…eldritch and organic. "No…we are not cowards, Adam Smasher. We are just ensuring that you know the fear and dread your victims experienced before your end."

"I FEAR NOTHING," Smasher retorted. "ESPECIALLY NOT A COUPLE OF COWARDLY LUMPS OF MEAT."

"Oh, rest assured, by the time we are done with you…you will," hissed the voice. Was it the same voice? It seemed to come from somewhere else, and seemed a little different.

And then, eerie singing came from them. A twisted version of a nursery rhyme. The lyrics were the same, but the way they were crooned made them sinister, and Smasher would deny that he felt a chill of fear.

"Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall,

All the king's horses and all the king's men…"

And suddenly, they were there, next to him, tearing off his arms with a strength he had never thought possible. He felt pain lancing through his metal body, something he'd all but forgotten what it had felt like. He had to admit, he wasn't a fan. Then, he was kicked to the floor, and his legs smashed in concert.

"…Couldn't put Humpty together again!" his assailants chorused.

Smasher stared up at his assailants. They were both humanoid, all covered in an inky black substance. Some sort of nanotech? Their faces had two white, blank eyes, while their grinning mouths…Smasher had never seen so many teeth since that time he went to a museum and saw a dinosaur.

And then, the faces of these monsters seemed to melt away, revealing a pair of unwelcome faces. One of them was definitely V, that Arasaka nobody turned merc. A would-be Edgerunner who wanted to be a legend, even if it meant dying trying.

But the other face? Now that was a surprise.

"Miss me, Smasher?" Johnny Silverhand said, his sardonic, bearded features set in a sneer.

"…JOHNNY BOY," Smasher growled. "HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE?"

"Oh, believe me, I'm as surprised as you are, Smasher," Johnny said. "Being stuck on the Relic isn't my idea of a fun time, but I wasn't expecting to get a new body into the bargain even if it was taken."

"But the past few weeks have been full of surprises," V said. "You see, after I took the Relic, Dexter DeShawn decided to zero me to cover his fat ass. Dumped me out in a dump in the Badlands. It could have been truly bad for me, given what the Relic could have done to me…except, well, do you believe in intelligent life in space, Smasher?"

"THERE'S FUCK-ALL DOWN HERE ON EARTH," Smasher retorted(1).

Despite themselves, V and Johnny laughed, a hateful sound. Then again, it wasn't like Smasher could do much about it. He was limbless, his weaponry destroyed, and his cybercomms were jammed. He was paralysed and impotent in the face of his foes. All he had left was spite.

"Well, long story short, a meteorite hit the ground in the dump. I'm surprised Arasaka or Militech or some other corpo didn't find it first. But, well, the meteorite had something, well, someone in it. Not a little green man, more of a sentient oil slick. A Symbiote, though I think his race is called a Klyntar. Long story short, the Symbiote needed a host to survive. He bonded to me, and we've become best chooms pretty quickly. Which was serendipitous. I mean, otherwise, the Relic, which was in my noggin, would have killed me. As it was, I was sharing headspace with Johnny here, as well as the Symbiote."

Then, part of V's suit seemed to bubble and move, forming into the same head and face he had seen before, leering at Smasher. "Allow us to introduce ourselves, Adam Smasher," it said, its deep voice oozing with fake politeness. "Given that our host's name is 'V', we decided on a similar name: Venom."

"AND WHY WOULD I NEED TO REMEMBER THE NAME OF SOME FUCKED-UP ALIEN CUMSTAIN?"

Venom's face looked to V and Johnny's, before they all shrugged. "Fair enough," V said. "But I'm overdue some payback, and so is Johnny. I intend to keep the collateral damage to a minimum, but Arasaka's going to be gutted tonight. And that means you die."

Johnny indicated Venom's head. "You see, Venom here was able to give me a whole new body. V had me promise not to run amok in it too much. We're hoping to give Rogue and even Alt a new one. The drawback is, Venom's species needs a regular supply of phenethylamine. Now, chocolate can do nicely, even that synthesized shit peddled these days has enough to keep him happy…but there's another way to get a supply: human brains."

V nodded. "Don't get me wrong, the thought of eating brains squicks me the hell out. But honestly, given all the gonks I've been zeroing, their brains have been going to waste even before I killed them. I just restrict it to the deserving."

Smasher scoffed. "AND YOU THINK YOU ARE BETTER THAN ME, EITHER OF YOU? DON'T MAKE ME LAUGH. YOU'RE JUST A DIFFERENT TYPE OF MONSTER, JUST MADE OF MEAT THAN METAL."

"Maybe," V said. "But it goes to show, Morgan Blackhand was right. Meat wins over metal. Who knew?"

Smasher stared at him for the sheer audacity of saying such a thing, before he began roaring in incoherent rage. How dare they say such a thing? He would KILL THEM! KILL THEM ALL!

Johnny, however, walked up to him. "V's kindly given me the honour of zeroing your metallic ass, Smasher." The Symbiote covered his head again, and now, there was only the blank white eye and the hideous grin filled with razor-sharp teeth. "Now, dinnertime."

His jaw distended widely, a huge gaping maw ready to bite through Smasher's skull. It was too much to hope that this new Johnny couldn't bite through them. Instead, Smasher sneered, "HOPE YOU CHOKE ON MY BRAINS, JOHNNY BOY!"

"He won't," Venom purred. And then, the jaws closed on his skull…

And thus ended the life of Adam Smasher. If he wanted to, he could take some small consolation in the knowledge that his employers would follow him into oblivion. But he would not have, even if he could have. Instead, the only consolation he could take was that his brain, pickled by centuries of nutrient fluids and preserving agents, gave Johnny Silverhand some mild indigestion. But then again, that was only a minor inconvenience to the reborn rockerboy…

THE END

ANNOTATIONS:

Wow. What a trip. True, it hit many of the same marks as Boîte de Conserve, what with the brain-eating and Adam Smasher getting overdue karma, but still…fun times, huh?

Keep in mind, V didn't let Johnny Silverhand out until he was sure he wasn't going to go on the rampage. The same applies to Alt Cunningham. Rogue's tentatively accepted the offer of a new body to replace her current one.

Also, while this is technically V and Johnny going solo in their attack on Arasaka Tower, it won't end in the 'Don't Fear the Reaper' ending. V just didn't want his closest allies getting hurt in the process. He also doesn't need to get Johnny out of his head, he's just looking for payback against Arasaka for making his life hell, and killing Jackie Welles. Oh, and he wants to help Takemura out by putting paid to Yorinobu, even if Takemura is an idiot who sold his honour to one of the worst people in the Cyberpunk world.

Anyway, this version of Venom is an anti-hero from the get-go, probably due to having V as an influence.

In any case, I hope you enjoyed this.

1. Adam Smasher is using my own paraphrasing of the last line of Eric Idle's The Galaxy Song from Monty Python's The Meaning of Life: "Pray there's intelligent life somewhere up in space, 'cos there's bugger-all down here on Earth!"