Present Day...

The inspector had finally left. Rachel was in her office, staring blankly at the wall. Her heart was numb, but her mind was racing with thoughts.

The past had come back to haunt her today. Her past. The past she had tried so hard to bury so she would never have to think about it ever again. For years, she hadn't thought about Amanda, or her daughter and the night that she'd lost her.

But the past had a way of rearing its ugly head when you least expected it.

The whole reason she had become Rachel Mason, the whole reason she had taken a career in education, was to stop what happened to her, happening to another teenager. And what had just happened? Another teenage girl, from a broken home, had buried her dead baby, without saying a word to anyone. She had given birth in the back of an abandoned car, alone and in fear. It had happened again. She had failed Maxine.

When she closed her eyes, she saw her own daughter, lying limp in her arms. She was back in that alleyway, sobbing and grieving everything she'd lost. The pain she felt in her heart returned, and it was enough to kill her.

She jumped as someone knocked on the door. Her eyes opened, groaning internally when she saw Eddie stood in the doorway. His eyes were burning into her own, trying to read her, to understand what she was feeling, what she was thinking. He'd never get the answers he wanted. He'd never be able to understand, no matter how much he wanted to. She wasn't about to drag him into her past. He'd never look at her in the same way again. It had taken her so long to get him to approve of the work she was doing at Waterloo Road, for them to get along and be civil to one another. She wasn't about to undo all her hard work.

"Rachel? Are you ok?" he asked gently

She offered him a teary and weak smile. It was the best she could do.

He wanted to wrap his arms around her, to tell her everything would be ok. He longed to know what was making her so upset. It wasn't just about Maxine and the dead baby. There was so much more to it than that. He could sense it.

"Talk to me, please?" he begged, sitting on the edge of the desk

She turned away from him, brushing the tears out of her eyes.

"Rach? Please" he insisted

She shook her head silently.

"Why won't you talk to me? Something has upset you" he questioned gently

"Is finding a dead baby on the premises not upsetting for you?" she snapped angrily, glaring at him

"Of course it's upsetting, Rach! But there's something more to it for you, I know there is!" he argued

"What is it, Eddie? Hmm? Is it because I'm a woman? You think women get more emotional about these things than men do?" she questioned

"What? No! Rachel,"

"JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!!" she screamed

There was a deafening silence. Rachel finally broke down. She placed her head in her hands as she sobbed, letting the pain and the grief wash over her.

Eddie moved beside her, wrapping his arms around her gently. She resisted for a moment, but her body quickly gave up and sank into him, her tears staining his shirt. He held her tightly as her body shook with sobs.

"Tell me what's going on Rachel, please?" he pleaded, rubbing his hand up and down her arm

She shook her head frantically

"I can't" she whispered

"Why not?" he questioned gently

"You'll never look at me in the same way again, Eddie. I can't- I can't do it" she whimpered

He sighed, tilting her chin so she was looking directly into his eyes

"Nothing you tell me will make me think any less of you, Rachel, I promise you. I know I've been a sexist pig in the past, and I'm sorry for that. I'm here for you now, I'm listening" he reassured

She stared at him for a moment. Her heart suddenly gave way as she got lost in his eyes. She could trust Eddie Lawson.

"My name hasn't always been Rachel Mason... it used to be Amanda Fenshaw" she explained shakily

"Ok..." Eddie responded, urging her to continue

"I-I" she stammered, her voice wobbling dangerously

Eddie took her hands into his own, smiling at her encouragingly.

"It's ok" he promised

She took a deep breath

"I was a prostitute...for two years" she admitted

Eddie sighed painfully

"I was 17. My Dad... he forced me. We needed the money. Two years, two whole years I was out on the streets. I was so scared and I hated every minute of it. But we needed the money, or I thought we did anyway. My Dad spent most of it on alcohol..."

Eddie's eyes were glued to Rachel's. He was listening intently, without judgment.

"When I was 19, I got pregnant. And I didn't know what to do at first. But I decided that it was my chance to get out of prostitution. My little girl was going to be my chance. I wanted to get an education and be a Mum. I'd saved up enough money to get myself away from my Dad, to get a flat somewhere. I was so excited, Eddie, everything felt like it was falling into place. I was going to be a Mum, I was going to have a baby and we were going to be so happy. It was all I'd ever wanted in my life. And then I told my Dad I quit and that I was leaving. He beat me up badly, and I... went into labour three months early. She was too early Eddie; I gave birth to her in an alleyway, and she was dead, she was gone and I couldn't save her..."

She let out a loud sob that threatened to break Eddie's heart. He wrapped his arms around her tightly again, stroking her hair softly.

"Oh, Rach, I'm so sorry" he whispered

"I let Maxine down, Eddie. When I pursued a career in education, it was to try and stop what happened to me happening to someone else. This happened right in front of us and we missed it! I missed it! What kind of Head Teacher am I?"

"Rach, this is NOT your fault! What happened in the past and what happened today isn't your fault, do you hear me? You did everything you could for your baby. And I know if you'd had the chance you would've been a fantastic Mum! The same goes with Maxine; you haven't failed her, not one bit! You just got her to talk to her whole year group, to raise awareness of what happened so it doesn't happen to anyone else! You did a great job today, Rach!" He reasoned

He pulled her into his arms as she continued to sob.

After a while, she pulled away from him, wiping her eyes. She smiled weakly at him. He noticed she was trembling from head to foot.

He stood up, guiding her over to the sofa and sitting her down gently.

He boiled the kettle, making her a well sugared cup of tea. She took it from him gratefully, sipping it quietly.

Eddie had questions, but now wasn't the time to ask. He had been shocked when she'd told him about her past. It broke his heart, knowing that she'd lost a child. He couldn't imagine the pain and heartbreak she carried with her every day.

Her past didn't bother him. Who was he to judge her? It was none of his business, so he was choosing to stay out of it. But he wanted to do something to help her right now, because she was in pain.

"Rach? Is there anything I can do?" he asked gently

She shook her head. If she was honest, just his presence, him being by her side was enough for her right now. She wasn't sure why, but her not knowing what was going through his head was bothering her. She had just told him she'd been a prostitute, and he'd barely reacted. Any normal person would have run a mile, or would at least be judging her. And Eddie wasn't. It unsettled her.

She'd never felt the need to prove herself to Eddie Lawson. As he'd said earlier, he had been a bit of a sexist pig during the first few weeks of them working together. They'd despised each other. But not anymore. They had a different relationship now. Rachel was fond of him, and he was fond of her. They were good friends and an even better team. Eddie was kind and loyal, she respected him. She felt like she'd potentially just jeopardized that by telling him about her past, and the thought of that made her feel sick.

"Eddie?"

"Yeah?" he answered

"I... I need to know what's going through your head... now you know about my past" she explained

"Rach, if I'm honest, I couldn't care less that you were once a prostitute. It makes me sad that you were forced to go through that by your own Dad, but I don't judge you for it. The past is the past, Rach. You don't have to explain yourself to me" He reassured

Her eyes welled up with tears again

"There is one thing, though" he admitted nervously

Rachel's heart filled with dread

"What is it?" she asked

"Your daughter, ever since you mentioned her, I can't stop thinking about it. I know you're in pain, anyone would be. But I want to help somehow" he sighed

Rachel grabbed his hand, shaking her head.

"You can't, Eddie. There's nothing you or I can do. It's a pain I have to live with"

"Sometimes, talking about it helps" he shrugged

She shook her head again, a stray tear falling down her cheek.

"I can't, it's too painful" she whispered

"I know" he nodded

"Did you give her a name?" he asked

She nodded

"Rosie. Her name was Rosie" she told him

Eddie smiled

"That's a beautiful name, Rach"

"She was so beautiful, Eddie. She was perfect. She had the most beautiful face and this gorgeous wisp of brown hair" she recalled, smiling tearfully

Once Rachel started talking about her little girl, she couldn't stop. Even though she only had very few details, she'd clung onto them with everything she had for years.

"When she was growing inside me, she was so feisty, always kicking and wiggling around! When I talked to her, she would just kick and kick and kick in response! It was the most magical feeling. Her food choices were weird. She always made me crave mint choc chip ice cream, buttered popcorn and pickles, and not separately either! You'd think it would be disgusting, but actually, it wasn't so bad!"

Eddie chuckled

Rachel hadn't realised until just then, but Eddie was listening intently, hanging onto her every word. He genuinely was interested. And that meant so much. She'd never felt able to share any of this with anyone, but with Eddie, somehow, it was easy.

"Thank you...for asking" she said

"It's ok; I wanted to know, Rach. Just because she's gone, doesn't mean you shouldn't talk about her. She shouldn't be forgotten. Rosie was your child, you loved her and she evidently loved you. She deserves to be remembered"

Rachel's heart warmed at that. She found herself wrapping her arms around him tightly.

"You would have been a great Mum, Rach. I know you would" he added, pulling apart from her

She smiled at him gratefully.