Episode 1

(Discount Tibet. Except this country wasn't taken over by a neighboring power demanding sovereignty at the threat of vio…oh, wait a minute.)

"What even is this sin? Yes, the developers based it on countries surrounding Nepal like Tibet and Bhutan, but…how is that a sin? A sin is usually a mistake on part of the developers, but this was clearly done intentionally to create a far Eastern kingdom. And Khura'in was never invaded by a neighboring power, so…your last line makes no sense here. I guess you realized how great this game is and you'd have to bleed a rock in trying to sin it?" One sin added.

(Narration.)

"This game literally takes us to faraway kingdom we've never seen nor heard before. You would prefer it if we just appeared in a place without any explanation as to where that is or why we are here? And don't try to be a hypocrite and claim you wouldn't sin the game for not giving you any information in that case, because I know you too well." One sin added.

(Timeskip occurs literally one minute into the game. And I thought Dual Destinies was weird about their sequencing.)

"Weird? How is that weird? Flash forwards and flashbacks are techniques have been dominantly used in fiction even before you were born. And yet you call this sinful? One would think that starting with the climax of the story and then properly building up to that moment is the opposite of sinful. But do you know what is sinful? Calling something sinful and not bothering to explain why it's sinful. In other words, being Piercetheveils." one sin added.

(We get an opening cutscene and then…an opening cutscene. The last two games just stuck with one and maybe an establishing shot. Right from the outset, this game is telling you that everything crazy will be doubled in magnitude.)

"Well, all the previous cases took place in Japanifornia. We are familiar with the place, so we wouldn't need any information on it. But this game…it takes us to a whole new country, one we have zero information on. The first cutscene is meant to both explain the core of the game, the revolution in Khura'in, and to show Phoenix arrive there. The next one shows us the treasure box of the founder's orb , which will be important for this case. And it does give us a good impression of the country's focus on religion." One sin added.

(How does having a child take the blame lessen the blight on your soul?)

"It doesn't. And Andistan'dhin knows this. Notice how he says "The blight on my soul?" Yeah, he knows he will be punished in the afterlife according to their religion. But he will try to avoid being punished for that blight in the human life as well. He will get away for the rest of his life by letting a child take the blame instead of accepting double the punishment." One sin added.

(Phoenix perpetuates the stereotype of an American tourist by taking pictures of literally everything.)

"Is that an American thing, though? I am pretty sure every normal tourist who goes to a place that looks completely different for what they are used to will want to take a bunch of photos to remember all that when they get home. What's the point of taking a vacation to a faraway land if you are not going to have anything to remember it?" one sin added.

(Phoenix gets a magatama cake to celebrate his arrival, but I don't. I just get to sit here and look like an asshole.)

"Are you padding the sin count, sis? I think you are padding the sin count." One sin added.

(When foreigners come to this country, they thing they most need to see is…a fourteen-year old girl dancing. Yeah, I took that line the wrong way.)

"Rayfa is the Kingdom's royal priestess. Her dance is one of the most important religious events in their culture, since it is their basis for their connection with the spirit realm. That's why it is so important for tourists to see it. I can assure you nobody would dare think of that specific girl sexually, let alone speak. Because if they did…may the holy mother have mercy on their souls." One sin added.

(Was it really necessary to blow the door open? These people are in a crowded room with the priestess and that could hurt somebody. Not to mention, your suspect is a nine-year old boy who can be easily detained. I feel like I'm going to be saying this a lot this game, but uncessarily violent actions are unnecessary.)

"So you think the police of a faraway, isolated region using excessive and unnecessary violence to arrest who they think is a traitor and stole their national treasure is unrealistic….when the police in Western regions will do exactly that for far lesser crimes? This is how the police are portrayed eight out of ten times in fiction, and there is a good reason." One sin added.

(And now they're surrounding him with guns as well as a random tourist. See earlier sin.)

"And since they are basically the same thing…is there any reason they had to be separated? No. Pierce sins the same thing twice cliché. I think you are padding the sin count." One sin added.

[(Bailiff poses for a picture.) Phoenix does not get a picture of this.]

"So you have sinned the fact Phoenix acted like a normal tourist and took pictures when everything was okay…and now that his…friend is on trial for treason and the situation is as dire as it gets…you wanted him to waste time taking a picture of the armed bailiff? You are so padding the sin count right now." One sin added.

(Phoenix tries to run away from and directly disobey a guy with a big gun after seeing how Ahlbi was arrested. I understand the plot needs to happen, but this is just stupid.)

"And you apparently don't understand Phoenix has been shown as being impulsive and not thinking something through before doing it. He has shown incriminating evidence to killers quite a few times. This is not anything he would absolutely not do, especially when we have also seen he is extremely loyal to his friends." One sin added.

(Here's one of my biggest gripes with this game, and I'm just going to get it out now. Khura'in is an isolated mountain nation with their own distinct culture. They have their own language and appear pretty unified in culture, minus the new immigrant uptick. We can probably assume Khura'inese is spoken by just about everybody, so if that's the case…why the fuck are their trials held in English?)

"This entire prologue was building up to this? Really? I thought it would be something serious. Look, I can get you are incapable of suspending your disbelief, even for five seconds, even for the sake of a game, but…this has been a trope for far longer than this game. Haven't you ever read comics? Take Scrooge McDuck for example. He and his nephews go all around the world-Arabia, India, Cyprus-to search for treasure. Have you noticed how they perfectly understand people speaking in other languages in all of those places? That's because in fiction, characters don't have to be perfectly realistic. This is what happens here. The citizens of Khura'in are made to talk in English so that Phoenix can understand them. How would he be able to do anything in this country if everyone spoke their native language? This is a game, some things are better done for the benefit of the audience instead of being perfectly realistic, something no one needs here." One sin added.

(For the second game in a row, Phoenix enters the first case by dramatically screaming objection from the doorway. It's awesome, but well on its way to becoming a cliché.)

"Something that has only been used twice can be called a cliché? I don't think something that has only been used twice can be called a cliché. And also, you say Phoenix yelled objection from the door, but when we see him, he is at the defense's bench and I don't think he could have gotten there in the few seconds it took the others to notice him. So I think he got there and then yelled, so you "Cliché" is non-existent anyway." One sin added.

(If Phoenix was really an ordinary tourist, what makes him think he can hijack a trial to question their legal practices?)

"The fact he is extremely impulsive and has a strong sense of justice? I believe that has been made crystal clear about him. I don't think you need to be an expert in law to know a trial without a proper defense is unfair to the defendant. Sure, it is kinda stupid for him to try and oppose an entire country's legal system without knowing anything about it…but I already explained above why Phoenix would totally do that." One sin added.

(I can accept the divination seances being important to this country's murder trials. I really can. But why do they let a fourteen-year old give the insights? Why not make that the prosecutor's job of a n unbiased legal expert's? Is it legal nepotism? A plot device foreshadowing Rayfa's character development later? I can never be sure on this one.

"How about the fact she is the country's fuckin' royal priestess?! It is her entire role to communicate with the spirits and give voice to them. Are you asking for the theocratic nation whose region determines literally everything in people's lives, both social and private, to ask a legal expert to carry out what is only the privilege of the royal family and is considered blasphemy for anyone else to even attempt?" one sin added.

(Nation's princess threatens to have a tourist-who hasn't even done any defending yet-shot as a souvenir. Because that wouldn't cause an international incident.)

"Hahahhahahahaha! Pierce….hahahahahahahaha! S…sorry…ahahahahahahahahhhhaahahah! Oh…thank you for that. Anyway, Pierce thinks an international incident would be sparked from the death of a random nobody in a faraway eastern nation. The American government would not give a shit about Phoenix. And that is, if the Khura'inese government told the truth and did not just pass his death as an accident, something the literal queen could do without lifting a finger. And why would America risk a conflict with a faraway nation over the death of a random tourist? You really have no idea how politics work." One sin added.

(Gaspen Payne left American in December 2027. This game opens up four months later. How the fuck is he a chief prosecutor in anything other than a self-styled nickname?)

"What a dumb question. Maybe because there are literally no lawyers left in the whole nation. How would he have any trouble climbing up the ranks with literally nobody to stand in his way? If all trials were as short as Ahlbi's almost was, he could get ten defendants declared guilty before lunch." One sin added.

(Treasure guards have guns, police officers have big guns, bailiffs appear to have assault rifles…and America is the one with the gun problem here. Though, based on my knowledge of Apollo Justice, if not earlier, we will impose stricter gun control on the future.)

"Hahahaahhahahahahahhahhahahahahahahahahahaha! Stop it! I'll pee myself! Hahahahahhahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! Pierce really thinks America will ever pass strict gun control. Uh…nope." One sin added.

(In Payne's version of the events, he forgets to tell us how the heck Ahlbi got into the treasure room. Did he apparate? Did Rohl need to use the bathroom and not use a shift partner. Does this get explained at all?)

"No, it doesn't But this is probably done on purpose. To showcase how broken this country's legal system is. All they care about is that their national treasure was stolen and circumstantial evidence seems to suggest Ahlbi did it. They do not care about answering all the trivial questions, especially when they haven't even bothered with tangible evidence in the twenty years since the DC act was put into place." One sin added.

(Does the defense have the right to cross-examine anyone in this court?)

"Yes, since they are shown to have it right now. You then claim this would mean Khura'in's legal system is the same as Japanifornia's, but…why would that be a sin? Msot legal system of the world are similar are similar in one or two aspects. The right to a defense and right to a cross-examiantion being some examples. So this is not as unlikely as you make it sound." One sin added.

[(This must be a new experience for you, Mr. Wright. To be loathed by a client.) It's really not. Edgeworth was pretty angry at him for making him lose twice, Lana was completely against his efforts and constantly told him to give up on her, Engarde hired an assassin to target Maya partially to make him suffer, Blackquill-as an unofficial client-couldn't stop cursing him…really, this was an inevitable next step in uncooperative clients. And that's not even counting Apollo's.]

"Okay, Pierce makes up a ton of shit here. Edgeworth was not mad at Phoenix for making him lose. At least not in turnabout goodbyes. By that time, he had made his heel turn and he had started to believe maybe he was wrong in pursuing a perfect record and renouncing everything else. He refuses Phoenix's help at first to keep him form finding out about DL-6, but as soon as he does, he becomes fully cooperative and accepting of his help. Engarde was a psychopath, but the part where you say he kidnapped Maya to torture Phoenix…that's a lie. He did not do it for that, not even partially. His sole intention was to get acquitted by Blackquill Phoenix into defending him. And Blackquill, by your own admission, is not even Phoenix's client." Three sins added.

"And really none of the clients we've had so far outright said "You disgust me" like Ahlbi does now. This is a whole new level in uncooperative clients and it seems really out of characters for Ahlbi, who was so friendly to us so far." One sin added

(Are monks allowed to have businesses? Later, the game makes it sound like they have to remain ascetic and detach themselves from the material world. Not to dash Ahlbi's dream, but this sounds like a real road to disappointment.)

"Ahbli is not a monk yet. He is training to be one, making money as a tour guide on the side. He could stop it when he completes his training to become a full monk. Considering how Pat Rohl gave up his dream to be a monk due to not having money for his family...yeah, Ahlbi should keep doing this for as long as possible." One sin added.

(Why is the gallery so vocal in this game? They've never had this many lines and most of them are just them being dicks to the defense or defendant. And none members get kicked out in either country.)

"I can give you for America…but here it serves a narrative purpose. It builds up the whole country's hatred for lawyers. This is a running plot point in the whole game and culminates in the finale." One sin added.

(How does Nayna slide across the screen like that? Unless the game tells me, I'm just gonna assume she uses roller-skates.)

"Pierce failing at game logic n. 236586." One sin added.

(Hey, are there musicians playing the dance of devotion sequence? Are they using a recording in court? If someone were to play a note wrong, would the victim's soul still show up? Does the dance have to set to this music in order to work? I need answers to solve this case, goddammit it!)

"Pierce failing at game logic n. 236587." One sin added.

(We know what the victim is hearing at the time of the murder, but can't actually hear what they hear. That would make future cases so much easier, so I'm gonna go ahead and sin it now.)

"And how would that work? How would we be able to hear what the victim heard and how they hear it? No, really, you criticize the game mechanics a lot, but never offer an alternative. The pool shows you what they saw and shows words of what they heard, feel, smell and even taste. I don't see how it could become any clearer." One sin added.

(I strongly object to the wording of the DC act. Without further elaboration, you can imprison or execute somebody for selling food to a guy on the run. That act unknowingly supports a criminal. What if you are the accused's spouse and giving them emotional support to get through prison? Are you just as guilty as they are? There's a reason laws tend to be so wordy and convoluted. I hate it too, but it serves a purpose to clarify issues like this, goddammit it! Also, Gara'n has no purpose making the law this confusing. If she wants to discourage accomplices and attorneys to criminals, she can still do that with a clearer law. She wants centralized state with absolute power, but how can she have that when the law is unclear, making it difficult to follow? And how the serious fuck was she in power for twenty-three years?)

"Okay…you are getting tens sins for this nonsense. Either you deliberately misunderstood this whole thing to pad your sin count or you are just dumb. Problem number one: it's clear supporting a criminal means to willingly and knowingly provide them support in criminal activity. That means selling food to someone who is a fugitive without knowing he is a fugitive does not count. And supporting a criminal means to either act as an accomplice to his criminal activities or help them evade capture or try to defend them in court. To provide emotional support to someone who's already in prison is not supporting anything illegal. You are just making shit up! Problem number 2: Gara'n's goal is to discourage criminal activity of all kinds. And her laws does that since, while not with enough details, it does make it clear you should not assist or defend criminals. That will make defense attorneys extinct and therefore discourage anyone thinking to commit a crime since they won't have anyone to support them if worst came to worst. And since the hatred for lawyers has become widespread since Dhurke was framed for Amara's assassination, this actually makes Gara'n more popular since, from the people's point of view, all lawyers are evil who will try to get criminals off the hook. Problem number 3: you ask how she stayed in power for twenty-three years. Is that even a real question? She is the last heir to the throne. Amara is thought to be dead and we don't know of any other living relatives. And since Gara'n is believed to have spiritual powers, she has every right to sit on that throne for the rest of her life. You have no idea how kingship works." Ten sins added

(Does Rayfa have to dance every time I replay the séance vision? If so, I really feel like an asshole after my first playthrough of the case.)

"Pierce failing at game logic n. 236588." One sin added.

(Also, how do these things rewind? Or pause?)

"Pierce failing at game logic n. 236589." One sin added.

(Payne underestimates Phoenix's ability to come up with implausible but true scenarios. This is the problem with attempting to get someone you have only met once executed: you don't know them well enough to access your chances of success.)

"And that's why Payne fails. Because he underestimated Phoenix's abilities and talent as a lawyer. That wasn't a sin. That was you pointing out what we can all see happening in the game and, for whatever reason, treating it as a sin." One sin added.

(Also, does anyone think Phoenix is gonna die here? He's an important character and we still have four episodes to go. That shit's too heavy for a first episode unless you are AJ or DGA.)

"Pierce said this opening for the game does not have high stakes. But how did we know he'd get away right now. What if he was imprisoned until execution and was proven innocent later. That was just as likely, so…" One sin added.

(Tongue shears.)

"Pierce points out things on the screen cliché." One sin added.

(Aw fuck, they dragged another adorable animal into these games? As long as we don't have to cross-examine it, I'll only ward half a sin.)

"Pierce sins an adorable animal for being adorable." One sin added.

"Also, Pierce sins something she likes cliché." One sin added.

[(Ahlbi can understand Shad'do.) Ahlbi and Luke Trion are long lost relatives. Calling the theory now.]

"Pierce apparently decided to become Mattpat. She's doing a shitty job at it." One sin added.

("Words of Wisdom! Words of truth…erm…baby tooth, foresooth, phone booth.) His magistry is me when writing poetry.]

"Interesting. No, that's actually really interesting. Now…how the hell is that a sin of the case?! This is the stupidest sin you have ever given, including your ridiculously obvious scene manipulations. I mean…what the fuck is next?! My shoelace is untied! Sin! My breath smells! Sin! I have to pee! Sin!" Five sins added.

(They do not performs the rest of this trial in song. Because that would have been interesting.)

"And yet you sinned Gaspen Payne singing twice. And now you sin the fact it doesn't happen more. So you sin the fact you were not given more excuses to shit on the case." Three sins added.

(Dumb and dumber reference.)

"Pierce points out things on the screen cliché." One sin added.

(Why does the judge get better at rhyming when he's giving penalties?)

"Because it's funnier that way." One sin added.

[(Witness goes metal.) Where did the amplifiers come from? And why was he wearing an electric cord as a…yeah, this isn't the weirdest transformation of the game. I'm not gonna linger on it.]

"Pierce failing at game logic n. 236589." One sin added.

"Also, sinning this transformation." Fifteen sins added.

(Why does a damahlan have electric capabilities?)

"Pierce failing at game logic n. 236590." One sin added.

(I've got chills, and they're multiplying.) Phoenix Wright confirmed to be a grease fan.]

"Yeah…we got that. Still waiting for a sin. I came here for a sin and…so far I see no sin." one sin added.

(You can disappear like a magic trick?) How does Andinstan'dhin know what the next case is about?]

"He doesn't." one sin added.

(Angry man exposed as a thief and murderer is not allowed to use swearwords. Even in a…wait, wat do you mean this game was rated T? What the fuck? In whose mind is DD more deserving of an M rating than this one?)

"To everyone with a brain. Are you serious right now? DD had one of the goriest, most unsettling scenes in the history of videogames…and you think this game is just as deserving of an M rating? What the fuck is wrong with you?!" one sin added.

[(We're not gonna take it! No, we're not gonna take it!) This line is appropriate for Andistan'dhin, but shouldn't it be twisted brother, since he's a monk?]

"Since this line is appropriate…why would it need to be different?" one sin added.

(Also, for a monk he sure does a lot of grinding and thrusting on that witness stand.)

"Pierce points out things on the screen cliché." One sin added.

[(Mr. Wright, do you expect magic to be around in every corner?) After razing Trucy and being a lawyer in this universe? Yes, yes he does.]

"Pierce yells at the screen cliché." One sin added.

(Phoenix is laughed at for suggesting a key can change shapes in this universe, simply because he isn't Edgeworth.)

"If Edgeworth was in Khura'in when making that suggestion, they would laugh at him too." One sin added.

(Wow. This locking mechanism is incredible, considering it's over a thousand years old.)

"Well, old items are actually much more durable and lasting than new ones. There are vases that have remained unharmed over thousands of years, but smartphones break every other week." One sin added.

[(Andistand'dhin's breakdown.) No one goes deaf from this.]

(Amps don't work like that. Also, how does that not break the damahlan?)

(Why do the same butterflies Nahyuta has resting on his fingers leave the pool of souls?)

"Pierce failing at game logic n. 236590, 236591 and 236592. Why does she keep doing this, you ask? My best guess is she is trying to break her personal record. Right now, she is about halfway there." Three sins added.

[(Inga Appears.) This asshole.]

"Sinning Inga. I mean…I get why you might hate him, he is a colossal asshole, but…that's the point. I will never understand why people blame villains for being hateable and despicable. They are meant to be so. They are villains. There has to be a guy you outright hate in any kind of a story, otherwise it will be a pretty shitty story. So…" three sins added.

(Ahbli tries to steal the title of motormouth from Oldbag. Wait…is Oldbag still alive in this universe?)

"Maybe…maybe not. My turn now: is any of that a sin on this case?" one sin added.

[(Ending cutscene.) How is Datz talking to Dhurke about this case? As of right now, he's still in priosn.]

"Either you are lying or really bad at reading the ace attorney wiki. Datz was still out at that time. He got caught and locked up sometime after this. The fact the guards wanted to question him when they saw he had escaped shows he has been recently caught. And, because I know you will ask, the fact he grows a beard and hair so quickly was done purely for comedic effect and because this is a game and not everything needs to make sense." One sin added

Total sins tally: 89

Sentence: Tongue shears.