Shadows Of Grief
Disclaimer: If you recognize it then I don't own it.
A/N: For Whumptober 2023 #23 "It's gonna get me by the end of the night." Shadows
Adrien was not going to make his appointment on time. He was supposed to model some of his father's designs for an evening fashion show but it didn't look like that would be happening anytime soon. His father would not be pleased. Adrien wasn't supposed to go anywhere alone, not even school which is why he was homeschooled. He hardly ever got to act like a regular kid and just hang out with his peers. Ever since he lost his mother his dad had become even more controlling over his son's life. Adrien had just wanted one day of freedom, where it was he who got to choose what he would do, not his father.
It was dark. He could hardly see the hand in front of his face. The night all around him was like a physical presence, it surrounded him in a heavy cloak of darkness. It was so thick before his eyes that he felt he was breathing it in. Each expansion of his lungs felt tighter with each breath. He couldn't escape its inky touch. He was alone in the darkness.
He had been alone much of his life. After his mother's death, his father had become a stranger. Consumed by his work and his grief but never his son that shared in both. Adrien had lost his mother and his father in the same blow. He haunted his own empty home, shadows of what once was and would never be again. Its many rooms and large open spaces were all the more empty because of the lack of family and love. He only was allowed to leave to model for his father's company and was always accompanied by his father's assistant, Natalie, or his bodyguard, Mr. Gorilla. Both were adults employed by his father. He could never be a normal kid, living a normal life with friends his own age. His own father treated him more like an employee instead of a son. A son who was still young and wanted to go to school and hang out with friends. He wanted to have a life. When his mother died he lost his life.
Adrien had not wanted to participate in the fashion show. He was tired and wanted to do what he wanted for a change. Not that his father had seemed to care. He had pretended to be sick when he woke up in the morning. Natalie had grown concerned, guilt pricked at Adrien's heart at worrying her, and called his father. As the phone conversation had heated up the assistant had left the room to argue the boy's case with his father. Natalie soon reentered his room with an annoyed air but looked down at the boy with sympathy. She had clearly not been able to talk sense to his father either. Every time Adrien tried to speak with him in the past about his feelings and wants the man had brushed him off, ignored his words, or gotten angry with his son. It seemed his assistant didn't have much more luck at being heard. Gabriel was a stubborn man who thought he always knew what was best and ignored anyone who suggested differently. Natalie apologized but told him he should rest all day until the show and she would get him some medicine that should help him feel a little better. His father was expecting him and he had no choice but to attend.
Adrien had enough. Once she left he had left out his window. It was a little tricky getting past Mr. Gorilla but he had known the man for years. While his bodyguard focused on detecting threats Adrien had been studying him. Once he cleared the yard he was home free on the streets of Paris. He planned to make it back in time to attend his father's fashion show, but only if he felt like it and only after he did what he wanted first. It would be his choice, not his father's
He wandered around the Eiffel Tower watching the people around him in awe. Nobody had recognized him yet and he was just another normal kid wandering the streets. He enjoyed the art and fashion all around him like he was experiencing it for the first time. In a way he was. He was an Adrien he had never been before.
He stopped at a little bakery and bought a bunch of delicious-smelling treats from the nice couple running the shop. Their size difference was almost comical but they fit together perfectly. He could see the deep love they shared, it made his heart ache for what he had lost. If they had a kid they sure were lucky.
He'd give almost anything to have his own family back, happy and whole. His mother was dead and his dad would never be the same as he was, there was nothing he could do about that so he'd just have to settle for being free. Even if it was just for one day in the sun.
He was having so much fun in his newfound freedom as the anonymous and unaccompanied Adrien that he lost all track of time as the sun began to set. He had journeyed across Paris to somewhere on the outskirts of the city. The opposite of where he needed to be to make it to the fashion show. Checking his pockets he confirmed his sinking suspicion, he had spent most all of the money he brought on various snacks and treats. There wasn't enough to pay for a ride back to his destination. He would have to get there on foot. He was going to be late if he could make it at all before the show ended. His father was going to kill him.
As he walked closer to the center of Paris the lights of the city lit his way but the shadows around him grew in intensity the more lights that shown in his path. He shivered at their dark, reaching fingers trying to pull him into their black voids. His father, it seemed, had allowed the shadows to pull him into the darkness after his wife died. He wallowed there unable to see the son standing and growing up before him. His father was the shadow living in the darkness and Adrien wanted to live in the sun once again. Like it was before his mother was gone, she had seemed to take all the light out with her, leaving them none.
Adrien stopped under the Eiffel Tower and looked up at its metal frame. He didn't know how to make his father listen to his wishes or how to make him love him again. A black cat curled around his legs and the boy knelt down to pet it. A frantic Natalie and Mr. Gorilla found him there under the lights of the tower holding the dark cat in his arms. The boy's tears were soaked up in the black fur. His father hadn't come for him, instead, he stayed somewhere in the shadows of the night drowning in his own grief while his son was alone trying to find the light.
