Darkness. Pain everywhere. Slowly, I open my eyes.
Huh?
Everything's flooded?
Almost like…
No…
No…
Not here. Please…
I groan. Yes. Everything still hurts…
But… This isn't the one where Madoka wished to erase the Witches. Wait… Then…
They all blend together for me. Which one was this?! Walpurgis Nacht is dead, but… I don't remember feeling like this after…
"Homura!"
That voice. Weakly, I turn my head. I feel the blood coursing down my face. I'm so… So tired…
And yet, I still feel her touch. Her gentle, cradling touch. Never too tight. I'd recognize it anywhere…
"Homura-chan!" Madoka cries, more frantically this time.
"Madoka…?" I whisper.
"Homura! You've been hurt so badly! I …I'll take care of it right away!"
"It's…okay…" I whisper.
"Homura…?"
I look up at her. Even when she's crying… Even when she wastes her tears on me… I've always found Madoka beautiful. If I'm gonna die… At least I can see seeing the one I love. I smile weakly at her. "I did it…"
"Hm?"
With all my strength, I lift up my hand, and I wipe away her tears with my thumb. "I finally did it… I saved you…"
I wheeze. Suddenly, it's way harder to breathe. Everything feels like it's shutting down. And I'm… So… So tired… Is this what dying feels like…? Am I…going to die…?
"Homura!" Madoka screams. "I'll get someone to help!"
"Don't leave me!" I whisper desperately.
Madoka whimpers at this, but reluctantly, she stays. "Homura…"
"Please…" I beg. "Stay with me…"
Madoka gives a simple nod, sniffling. I continue. "I'm…so happy right now. Over and over and over again, I've had to repeat the same time… Again and again…" I cough a little. "But now… I finally…My wish finally came true…" It does make me feel warm. Yes… I did it… "You made it come true. Your destiny… could change after all…"
Madoka shakes her head, starting to cry again. "But Homura… If you're gone… It won't mean anything if my destiny changed! Homura, I get it… I finally understand… All this time… You've been protecting me. I'm here now… Because you wanted me to be." She presses her forehead to mine, and I get a glimpse of her beautiful magenta eyes… One last time…
"You're my best friend, Homura. So please…" Her voice cracks. "Don't leave me…"
"It… It'll be okay, Madoka…" I assure her, trying my best to make my voice show this, but I can feel myself getting weaker. "You still have important people… Your family… Who love you… It's okay…"
"B…But Homura…"
"Hey…Madoka… I've finally realized… How I could work so hard to save you… For so, so long… Trapped in this eternal maze…" Say it. Four simple words. 'I love you, Madoka.' Come on. Say it.
Alas, even now, I can't. But I can get close. "I could do my best… Because of you, Madoka. To save you… And to save myself… There really was no other choice."
Madoka whimpers. Oh, Madoka…
"Please, Madoka… Don't be so sad. You… You saved me too. When you're sad… When you cry… That makes me sad too!"
"…Homura…"
"I'm so glad you were here… That I could see you… One… Last time…" As I close my eyes, I whisper my last words. "Thank you for letting me protect you… Madoka…"
Vaguely, as if I'm underwater, I hear Madoka crying, but… But this is what I wanted. I kept Madoka from selling her soul. I… I don't have to fight anymore. I'll… Never… Forget…
"Homura!"
Huh? What? D… Didn't I… Die?
"Thank you for everything… Dear sister…"
No. Right. They… They saved me. I… I wanted to save Kuroe. Then, I felt… I sensed Madoka…
"Homura!"
Slowly, I start to feel my body again. Is this like where I'm aware, but I can't move?
…
No. No. It was difficult, but I'm pretty sure that was my hand clenching. Maybe this is another thing about healing quickly. I feel my eyelids. They feel like they weigh so much, but slowly, I force them open.
I regret it. All I can see is bright lights. Groaning, I close my eyes again. I try to open them. This time, the light is less overwhelming, but I still have to squint for a bit. After an eternity, my eyes finally adjust. Things are so blurry.
Where am I?
Am I in the hospital again?
I look around, at least as well as my body would let me. No… The colors seem too warm. As my eyes adjust more, I see where I am.
This… This is my room. My apartment. My… home.
I reach out for my bedside. I feel my glasses. Good. They're where they always are. Whoever put me here at least got that right. I put my glasses on, and though it's small and only lasts a second, I feel comforted. If it was just about seeing, I'd heal my eyes again. But something about my glasses… Just feels right. I can't really describe it.
"Yes, of course I'm at Homura's! I've been keeping you updated, haven't I?!" I hear a voice down the hall. I smile a little. Hitomi…
"Miss Saotome, it's not my fault you don't believe me! I told you how I broke my hand! Homura protected me!" I could hear her footsteps coming closer. "I told you, Homura's friend was in danger, and Homura got in a fight with one of her old bullies, and I couldn't very well let her get herself killed! Yes, I'll make sure it doesn't happen again!" A groan. "If you wanna visit again, I'm sure we can find a time! Not like you have any dates to go on!" A pause. "Yes, Miss Saotome. I know this isn't the time to talk about romance, but you know it's true! The Kanames and I are looking after her!" She enters my room, and I gaze at her, still tired.
"When she wakes up, you can tell her how… Worried… You… Are…" Hitomi and I look at each other. "I'll call you back…" Slowly, she hangs up, though I catch some protest on the other end.
"…You're up…" Hitomi whispers.
"…I'm up…" I reply. My voice comes out weak and hoarse, but it comes out.
Hitomi shakes her head, quickly coming over to my bedside. "Do you have any idea how worried I was about you?! You could have died, if those two girls you saved didn't give up their cubes to help you!"
"They…helped me…?"
Hitomi nods, still crossing her arms. "Seriously. One of these days, you're actually going to get yourself killed! What are we going to do then?! What am I gonna tell Saotome?!"
"Why… would you need to tell her…?" I tilt my head, wincing a little as it hurts.
Hitomi blinks, then she sighs. "You really don't know yet, do you? Well, I'm sure it's best if… If she tells you."
"Tells me what?"
She shakes her head. "She'll tell you. How are you feeling?"
I sigh, my head falling back onto my pillow. "Everything hurts. How are you?"
I notice that Hitomi's hand is wrapped up in a cast. She shrugs. "Surprisingly, my hand's the only thing that was broken. The others really helped me heal, but some of it still hurts. Heh. At least school wasn't in session, right?"
I shake my head, whimpering in pain. "Kuroe… Where's Kuroe?"
Hitomi sighs. "She's in the next room. I think she's sleeping. Homura… When she heard what you did, she freaked out. Said she wasn't worth losing you."
"I didn't want her to die…"
"I know, Homura, but if there weren't so many Grief Cubes, you'd have just traded her life for yours. I know you think that's worth it, but Kuroe wouldn't!"
"You sound just like my mom probably would…"
"Heh. If you think I sound like a mom, just wait until Saotome visits!"
I sigh. "I…want to see Kuroe…"
"Are you sure you're up to it? You've been asleep for at least a day."
I slowly try to get up. My body screams at me, and I bite back the tears, though I do hiss a bit. "I'll be fine. Now that I'm up, I'll be healed in no time…"
By some miracle, I actually manage to get out of my bed after a while. I grab onto it when I start to stumble. "S…See? I'm okay." It still hurts, though I can tell it's already hurting way less.
Hitomi shakes her head. "Lean on me, Homura."
I look at her oddly. She simply smiles. "Let me help you. You've helped me so much…"
"…Fine…" I reply. I wrap an arm around Hitomi's shoulders. With her support, I manage to slowly limp to the guest room… The room that used to belong to mom
and dad, if what I remember saying way back in the timelines was true. Hitomi opens the door and leads me to the chair by the bed. I sit down, still wincing as my body tries to protest the activity.
"I'll… let you have your moment, Homura. Yell if you want something." Slowly, she leaves the room.
I look at the bed, and I release a breath I didn't even know I was holding. There she is. Kuroe. My dear sister. Breathing. Healing. Alive. I know she'll have words to say to me when she wakes up…
But for now… For this moment… Seeing her alive, knowing I was the one who saved her…
It was worth it.
"Hey, sis…" I whisper, my voice still hoarse. "Um… I'm not dead…"
"…Good…" a whisper comes from her. I glance down. Yawning, Kuroe opens her eyes, and my relief intensifies. "Then it worked…"
"Kuroe…"
"Heh… You're lucky Tomoe or Sakura aren't here right now. They said me and Hitomi'll give you enough of a lecture…"
"Hitomi said… Sarasa and Sena gave me their Grief Cubes…"
Kuroe nods. "When I woke up, Yuuki was long gone, but you were twitching on the ground. Then, you went still. Then, all of us heard a voice. Over and over again. 'Save her! Save her!' It was the voice of the girl that gave you the ribbon. And…yeah, I can see why she sounded so frantic. Your Soul Gem can hold a lot of despair, but if it were any blacker…" She shakes her head, and I feel her hug me slowly. "I'd have lost you…"
I return her embrace as much as I can without hurting much. As we hold each other, the pain starts to fade. I rest my head on her shoulder. After a while, I say simply, "I couldn't lose you, Kuroe…"
"I understand. I don't know why you think I'm worth it, but I understand…"
"Why are you worth it?" I ask in a whisper. I shake my head. "You really don't know? It's because you're my sister, and I love you. Do I really need another reason?"
"Homura… Just… Please… Promise you won't leave me…"
"Kuroe, I…" I lean back, and I see how she's gazing at me. I sigh. "Yeah. I promise." And as I say that, I find that I actually mean it.
"Then… I won't leave you either. Like you said…" Kuroe's face softens. "There's so much we have to do together, right? When we all heal, I mean."
"Of course, dear sister. Whatever you want."
Kuroe sighs. "Those two said to tell you something."
"Oh?"
"They said… Thank you for saving them, and that if they were ever in the area, and you needed help, they'll help you. Somehow, they knew… You were telling the truth. You know what it's like to have everyone hate you… Only for that one special person to give you a chance, and it… It feels like your life's really beginning there."
"Yeah… It really does…" I mumble.
"…So when were you going to tell me you can just siphon someone else's despair?"
"I only did it once before then, and I didn't know I could do it that much. I thought only Madoka could…"
"Yeah, well, to be fair, Madoka can't die from it." Her voice grows stern as she continues, "Unlike you."
"Hey! It was an emergency! I'm not gonna make a habit out of it!"
"See to it that you don't, little sister," Kuroe replies. "I'm just…so glad you're better."
"…Can you walk?" I ask.
"Can you?"
I shrug. "Sort of. I mean, when my healing's done, I'll probably be able to walk fine."
Kuroe shakes her head. "You're gonna need to not make a habit of this, Homura."
"I think I only got hurt so bad because when I saw her…" I shudder, not even want to think about what I saw Yuuki do. "Something in me just snapped, and she was so smug about it. All I wanted was to shut her up and… And make her feel the terror we felt. I… I hated feeling like that. I hate it so much…"
"Yuuki doesn't understand. She doesn't care, like you do, dear sister. That's what makes you strong. I know you could have killed her, but in the end, you chose not to."
I shake my head. "Kyouko will probably say that'll cause problems later on."
"Problems we can face together, Homura." She grasps my hand, gazing close to my eyes. "As a family."
"All of us," I hear Hitomi's voice as she enters the room. She puts her hands on our shoulders. "I know you two don't like being Magical Girls, but if you weren't, I don't think I'd be here today."
"I don't know…" I reply. "The way you punched Yuuki was pretty neat."
"Yeah. Breaking my hand because she reminds me of how I used to be. Great."
"I mean…" Kuroe smiles softly. "Before you went all… Angry… You were pretty cool."
"I wasn't that—"
"Come on. You didn't miss a beat, Homura! I lost count of how much you saved me! And the way you talked to Sena and Sarasa? Not every Magical Girl's as perceptive as you! They switched sides because you got through to them!"
I laugh. Sure. "Yeah. And the fact that some evil girl was controlling them like puppets had absolutely nothing to do with them fighting us."
"The way they made it sound…" Hitomi replies softly. "Yeah, she had a hold on their minds, but… All they could really think about was protecting each other. From you, yes. But when we broke them free… Also from Yuuki. Homura, you're kinder than you think you are. You always have been."
"Come on! You can't deny that it's cool! You literally broke them free using their love for each other!" Kuroe says happily.
I sigh. "You two make me sound way more cool than I really was…"
"The point is we won, Homura. We won, and we're all alive."
"By the skin of our teeth…"
"You've shown us both your story. We've seen you survive 'by the skin of your teeth' so much, you're probably immortal by now!"
"Don't…say that…" I don't want to be immortal. And on the other hand… That dream…
"What is it, Homura?" Kuroe asks.
I sigh. I suppose I should tell them. "When I… saved you, Kuroe, I saw some of your memories. Some of her your memories. I suppose that's what bearing the burden of someone else's despair means. I… I saw you talk to Tamaki. And… That that was your last time seeing her…"
Kuroe sighs. "I wish I'd told her how I felt. Maybe… Maybe I could have saved her…"
"Maybe whether she's with Madoka or somewhere else… She's watching you…"
"Yeah… Maybe… I think she'd have liked you, Homura…"
I sigh. "There was more to it. I found myself in Mitakihara. But… Mitakihara after Walpurgis Nacht was beaten. The strangest part?" I shake my head. "I've never seen things end up quite like that?"
"What… happened?"
"I… I remember being in pain. Madoka ran over to me, and she comforted me. I think I beat Walpurgis Nacht by myself, somehow. Madoka was crying, telling me the usual stuff about how I protected her, and how I was her best friend." I find myself sniffling. I wipe the tears away. "I wanted to tell her how much I love her. I tried. But all I could manage… Was telling her that she was the reason I could be strong. And… And it's true. I've found I'm only strong when I'm protecting what I…" I look at the two. I will not let this be like the dream. "What I love. That's the only reason I'd ever want to fight. Not to kill, but to protect. That's all I ever really wanted. But in that dream, I… I…" My voice comes out a whisper. "…Died…"
"…How'd it feel, Homura?" Kuroe asks slowly.
I shake my head. "I seemed at peace with the idea, but the truth is I really don't know how I felt. If you're asking if I'm gonna die anytime soon? Well, I'll try my best not to. But I'm reckless. I'm impulsive. I tend to dive head first into things like this with no idea what I'm gonna do even if things work out."
"Well…" Hitomi replies. "We can help you with that. You don't have to bear the weight of the world on your shoulders."
"Yeah. We're your family, Homura. Let us help you."
"My… family…" I mumble. "You feel that way too? I… I like it. I have a family."
"And don't ever forget it!" Both of them said at the same time.
"Well, come on, you two! Dinner in the living room's probably better than dinner in here!" Hitomi says happily, and indeed, I smell something cooking. The three of us walk out of there.
"So…did anything else happen while you were sleeping?"
The feeling of warmth returns. The memory of it, at least. "I think I heard… Madoka…"
"What did she say?"
"…Basically that… That she'd see me really soon… But she made it sound like I'm not gonna die anytime soon…"
"Well, I have met her…" Kuroe whispers.
"Wait, you met Madoka?! How?! Where?!" Hitomi asks.
"Can't really tell you much. Some strange girl gave me a box and told me to give it to Homura. That's about all I know. Well, besides what Homura's told me and the voice going all, 'Save her! Save her!'"
"Madoka's not that strange," I mumble, old instincts to defend her flaring up.
"Yeah, she kind of is, Homura. You never knew her when she was younger."
"She told me a lot, Hitomi. She's quirky, not strange."
"Yup. You really are in love with her…"
"Didn't I make that clear?"
Kuroe sighs. "Girls, the point is clearly, Homura's gonna see her soon. Wait…" Kuroe runs out of sight. When she gets back, she holds out that box. "She said she wants you to be wearing your glasses and this."
"…The ribbon…?"
"I'm not Madoka, but clearly, this thing's really important to both of you! Humor me, sis."
With a reluctant sigh, I take the ribbon off of Kuroe's hands. Despite it being a while, my hands remember how to tie it into my hair. Like my glasses, it feels right somehow. But unlike the older, more nostalgic feeling, the ribbon gives off a more hopeful one, which I suppose is fitting. I blush, embarrassed. "J look weird, don't I?"
I look at my family. Hitomi's gawking. Kuroe, on the other hand, smiles. "She was right. It does suit you, Homura."
"Yeah!" Hitomi says. "It's really pretty!"
"Um… Thank you?" I reply. Even coming from one of them, I'm still really shy when someone says that and means it.
"I bet you'd look even prettier with that and the braids like you used to wear!"
I shake my head. "I'm not used to people thinking I'm pretty, especially like that."
"But how do you feel about it, sis? You said you didn't feel any stronger changing your hair or losing your glasses," Kuroe says.
"How do I feel about it, sis?" I ask softly. "…I miss wearing my braids," I find myself admitting. "When I wear my hair like this, I feel like I have to act like someone I'm not." I sigh. "Some things have changed, but when I really think about it…" I grab a few strands of my hair, playing with it a little. "I'm still that shy, awkward girl that just wanted someone to show me kindness. Is… Is that okay?"
Both of them nod immediately. "Homura, we know you're comfortable around us," Hitomi says.
Kuroe adds, "And we've both gotten to know you pretty well. We love you, Homura."
For some reason, Hitomi blushes and hides her face from me. Weird. "Thank you… Truly…"
Suddenly, we all hear knocking. "Who'd be visiting me now?"
Hitomi shrugs. "Probably Tomoe. I'll get it."
I see her go to the front door and open it. She freezes, and when I catch a glimpse of bright pink, I freeze too.
"Um… Homura?"
"Yeah?"
"You know how you said in your dream, Madoka would see you really soon?"
"Yeah…"
"Um… She's here to see you…"
"I… see that…"
Slowly, I walk towards the front door. And yeah, there she is. Eyes glowing bright gold, the white flowing dress, and her hair seeming so much longer. Goddess or human, Madoka is beautiful.
Knowing her, she's wearing this so I know it's her, and she didn't make some other Madoka for this world.
"Um…hi, Homura…" she says. Somehow, her voice and her warmth are more intoxicating in person. And yet, all I can do is stare, my mouth agape, and my mind very confused.
"Can… Can I come in?"
