Author's Note: Uh. Hey guys. Is it 2023 already? Hah. I rediscovered this recently and realized that, although I wrote most of the interesting scenes, I never published them because I was too lazy to write all the filler. I was then dared to complete it. So I'm back, almost a decade later, to fill in the blanks and give you a proper ending to this story. There's a lot more to come. If there's anyone still out there. The rest of the story from here on out will be a mixture of what I wrote in 2014 and what I've decided to write now, 9 years later. For now, enjoy some extremely poorly-written filler! Yay! Our favorite!
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Chapter Nine
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The bells chimed early on Sunday morning, and Neil was still reeling from the night he had spent with Angela alone in his bedroom. He could still smell her perfume in his sheets and he swore he could even still feel her presence on his skin, his lips, his body. He lay on his back and stared at the ceiling for a few moments, smiling and exhaling-almost in disbelief-before getting out of bed and preparing for the day. He found it difficult to focus on much else. It hadn't quite been exactly what he was expecting, but Neil would be lying if he said he didn't feel almost like a different person now that he had consummated his relationship with Angela.
It was around early afternoon when Neil was seated at his desk finishing up a Latin assignment. His bedroom door was open as usual-an invitation (or a plea) to his friends to come inside and distract him. He was also awaiting Todd's arrival, whenever that would be. He suddenly received a knock at the door. He turned his head from the homework to the doorway, where he saw Charlie casually leaning against the frame.
"Charlie," Neil greeted with a smile, taking off his glasses.
"So, Neil!" Charlie walked in and shut the door behind him, taking no time to seat himself on Todd's bed. "How was last night?" He had that goddamn smug smirk planted on his face as he anticipated hearing the dirty details of Neil's evening with Angela. Neil had, of course, asked for Charlie's advice as to how to sneak Angela into his bedroom after hours, and he knew Charlie was going to want to know all about it.
He'd rather Charlie than anyone else, he supposed. If Neil had to pick a "best friend", it would be Charles Dalton.
Neil's mouth curled up into a smile. He couldn't help it. He tried not to, but just thinking of the events of the previous night were enough to make him blush. Charlie noticed this and laughed.
"Come on," he playfully prodded, grabbing Neil by the shoulder and shaking him gently with a grin. "Did ya do it?" Neil cracked then and began laughing, bringing a hand to his face embarrassedly.
"Yes, Charlie. We did." This elicited a look of pure joy on Charlie's face.
"Alright, Neil! No longer a virgin!" He lightly punched Neil's shoulder in a display of affection. "Congratulations. How'd it go? Did she like it?"
"Well, it was-it was great, of course! She-yeah, she liked it." Neil paused for a moment. "I think." He let out an awkward laugh.
"You think?" Charlie questioned. "What, you didn't talk about it?"
"No, we talked about it. She-she said it was fine."
"Fine? Just fine?" Charlie furrowed his brow. "Neil..."
"I mean, she said she liked it!" Neil interrupted, suddenly growing defensive. "It was both of our first times, obviously it wasn't going to be perfect."
"Well, no, of course not," Charlie started, "but..." His voice trailed off.
"But what?"
"Well, did she come?"
Neil blinked.
"Did she?" Neil repeated. Charlie nodded in response. He had heard him correctly. "Well, sh-she... I." He was flustered now. Was she supposed to? "I guess not. Or at least... She didn't say anything. She just-she said it was nice, but-but that it hurt," he finally admitted. "I had no idea. She looked like she was having a good time, but I guess she was uncomfortable." Neil had no idea why he was suddenly feeling so confessional, and he braced himself for any amount of teasing or chastising. Neil wasn't exactly sure why he was expecting Charlie to be anything less than supportive. He was anything but cruel, and when he did tease Neil it was merely playful. The two were very close, and there was no reason for Charlie to try and humiliate him. Neil supposed it was better to be honest and ask for advice than to lie to him. Especially since he found himself suddenly feeling so... inadequate. Charlie's response was of course positive, and Neil wasn't sure why he was surprised by this.
"That can happen," he replied. "There are things you can do to make that better, though. Did you... do any foreplay?"
"Well, I-" Neil stopped to think for a moment. "No," he eventually relented.
"Well there's your problem. You have to do some of that next time. Start with the fingers, go down on her, that sort of thing." Go down on her... oh. Neil had used his fingers on Angela before. His mind flashed to a couple of weeks ago, in the backseat of her car, parked in a small wooded area.
Charlie continued, "You've gone down on her before... Right?" There was silence for a minute and Neil felt himself growing embarrassed. "Neil!" Charlie shook his head in lighthearted disbelief. "You're gonna want to read something, just give me a minute." He turned and left Neil's room, keeping the door open behind him. Neil just stood there in the center of his room, staring at the floor. He couldn't believe that he had fucked up their first time so badly without even realizing it. He was almost embarrassed that Charlie seemed to be taking pity on him like this. It wasn't like he was some sort of casanova, but he had at least messed around with a couple of girls in his life, which was more than any of the rest of them had done.
Neil loved this woman! He couldn't believe he had been neglecting her needs so much. Or that she hadn't drawn his attention to this fact.
A few moments later, Charlie returned to Neil's bedroom and kicked the door shut behind him. He dug his hand into his shirt pocket and pulled out what seemed to be a folded-up sheet of laminated paper.
"Okay, this is what you need," he explained, letting the paper unfurl as it dangled from his fingertips. Upon further inspection, Neil could see that it was a page ripped out of a magazine. "This article taught me everything I need to know." He handed it over to Neil, who stared down at it for a moment in disbelief. "After reading that and putting it into action, Angela will be thanking you when you're done with her." He smirked. "I won't ask about the rest of the night if you don't want me to. Just trust me on this one, though." Charlie began to back away from Neil towards the doorway. He pointed at him. "She'll love it, Neil. They all do." Neil just shook his head incredulously.
"Charlie," he started while still shaking his head-though he wasn't sure what he was going to say as Charlie swung open the door.
"No need to thank me yet, Neil!" And with that, he was back into the hallway and out of sight.
Neil knew Charlie wasn't just fucking with him, and he knew he wasn't trying to embarrass him. He was aware that Charlie was trying to help, and believed that whatever article he had ripped out of whichever dirty magazine actually had taught him quite a bit. But still, he couldn't help but feel humiliated. How could he have messed up the first time that badly? Angela acted like she had enjoyed it, but how could that be when she was supposedly in so much pain, and hadn't even come? How enjoyable could it have been when he didn't even attempt to make things pleasurable for her? Neil frowned, sat down on his bed, and began taking Charlie's advice.
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Neil decided to ring up Angela that evening. The conversation he had with Charlie earlier had put all sorts of ideas in his head, and he was growing anxious by the minute. He was worried that he had done Angela wrong, and wanted to make things right if she'd let him. He was worried that she was already over him. He dialed her number and waited.
"Hello?"
"Hi, Angela."
"Neil, what's going on? I wasn't expecting you to call tonight!" She was surprised, but happy, and he could hear her smiling through the other end.
"I just wanted to talk to you for a bit, and make sure..." He trailed off. "Make sure that things are okay?" She was confused.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean... Last night," he tried. "Are you okay?" Angela couldn't help but let out a tiny giggle. She found his concern delightfully endearing.
"I'm fine, Neil, don't worry about me." It was true-she was fine. Though she had remained sore for some time afterwards.
"Are you really, though? I mean really. Did you enjoy it? Physically, I mean. Were you satisfied physically? Please answer honestly, I can handle it."
Angela paused and attempted to choose her words carefully. She knew that Neil was extremely insecure and she didn't want to make things worse for him. She did want to be honest, though.
"I enjoyed it Neil," she started, "because it was with you. And I-I mean, we talked about it last night: I love you. Anything with you is going to be special, and enjoyable, and I'm going to love it because it's with you."
She paused again, trying to piece together exactly what she wanted to say. "But..." Neil prepared himself. Here it came. The rejection. The proof that he couldn't do anything right. The proof that he was no good, that he had let his love down. "If you really want to know the truth-and please don't let this overshadow what I already said-it was more uncomfortable than physically pleasurable for me, personally."
He knew it was coming, but he still felt completely dejected.
"Angela, I'm so sorry," he started, "I-"
"Neil, please don't apologize! I just told you I loved it, and please believe me when I say I wouldn't change a thing about the first time. You just asked me if I enjoyed myself physically, and I answered honestly. That's it. It was our first time with anyone, Neil. Period. I wasn't necessarily expecting to have some sort of life-changing orgasmic event. I just wanted to show you that I love you, and I do, Neil. I love you. And I loved being able to do that for you. If it really bothered me that much, I would have told you at the time."
"Will you let me make it up to you? Soon? Since we've gotten the first time out of the way, I mean? I want to make you feel as good as you made me feel." She grinned.
"I suppose that could be arranged."
"Next weekend? Friday night?"
"It's a date."
"Great." He suddenly had an idea. The club. A meeting. Neil and his friends had only recently founded the newest chapter of the Dead Poets Society and he felt a sudden twinge of guilt that he had not yet told Angela about it. It was too soon, he thought. He didn't want to risk anything. Not yet. Not just yet.
"I'll call you later this week, then," Neil said instead.
"Break a leg at the audition tomorrow, by the way," Angela suddenly added. His heart leapt. She remembered the date.
"Thank you. I-I love you." Neil still wasn't used to saying it, but now that they had both admitted it, it was all he wanted to tell her.
"I love you too."
