Trigger Warnings:
Schizophenia-like symptoms
Sexism

The next few weeks found the weather grinding to a dull halt. The dementors' presence seemed to be seeping into the clouds and thick swirls of mist cloaked the grounds and a bitter chill found its way into the castle. Ginny, Colin and Luna hid themselves away in an abandoned classroom on floor six attempting to learn the Patronus charm from one of the books Bill suggested. They had understood the theory without issue but the practical was another beast all together. Bill had given them some tips but without being there in person to help there was little he could do. They had approached Flitwick but he claimed it was far too difficult for second years and would take a lot of tutoring that he could not provide with the OWL and NEWT student tutoring he already had on his plate. Which, although disappointing, Ginny thought was fair.
"It can't be that hard" Ginny huffed. She waved her wand and practically bellowed the incantation. Nothing happened. Luna looked over at her sympathetically, she hadn't had much luck either. They had all thought that Colin had managed to get the charm to work the previous day, only for it to quickly become apparent that the whist form was actually peeves taking the mick. They hadn't been back to the classroom on floor three since.
"Maybe our memories aren't happy enough" Colin suggested from his place on the floor.
"There have been a lot of nargles around you know. I wouldn't be surprised".
"I don't know what we do about that!" Ginny snapped. Taking one look at Luna's arched brow she muttered an apology and received a gentle nod in return.
"My Mum is always talking about this guy who found a way to help you feel more happy. It's muggle stuff about changing how you think but... it couldn't hurt, right?".
"That's a great idea Colin. In the meantime I'll write to Daddy, maybe the gnomes have something to impart".
Muggles and gnomes, Tom snarled. You're absolutely hopeless. Do you know want to know what it feels like to be kissed by a dementor, Ginny? To feel your soul slip out from your very being, to...
Ginny leant back against the wall and envisioned her sandstorm in full force. It wasn't perfect but the malice was muted by the roaring of the sand.
"Come on, let's try some other spells. I still haven't gotten last week's transfiguration down wandless".
Luna placed her hand gently on Ginny's shoulder "We will get there". The Dementors presence on the outskirts of the grounds and Tom's ever continuing presence in her mind definitely wasn't helping her performance with the Patronus charm. Whenever Ginny thought she had found a good memory, Tom would twist it into something unusable whenever she tried to cast. It was really starting to grind her patience down. One time she tried focusing on the kindness Colin had shown to her and their friendship but Tom had twisted her mind into thinking it was out of pity rather than friendship. It took a lot of reassurance from Colin and Luna and even more occlumency to put the member back to normal. She was so scared of twisting a memory that she couldn't get back that she pushed her happiest memories of Bill to the side when practicing. Luna and Colin were also having little luck but they were both hopeful that their parents would send them some useful information soon.
The trio didn't slack though and continues to train in other ways. Ginny kept up her physical exercises in abandoned classrooms feeling uncomfortable with the Dementors outside. Instead of running, she instead focused on some martial arts based cardio Bill had taught her alongside sit ups and other strength and agility based activities. Luna favoured yoga and flexibility while Colin did a mixture of both. He often joined Ginny's high-intensity workout to start before winding down with some of Luna's calming stretches. They met every morning to do this and in the evenings focused on magical training. They practiced the wand motions and incantation for the Patronus charm for at least fifteen minutes a day before moving onto other things. After fully disclosing the events of the summer to Colin and Luna they helped her practice summoning the wind. Luna spent time learning and practicing odd spells that Ginny couldn't always see the benefit of, such as the colour changing spell. Whereas Colin was pretty nifty with transfiguration and was training himself to cast stronger and stronger transformations. They would also practice dodging together using a smart little spell that Colin likened to Muggle paintballs (without the mess). They were under no delusions about their age and power and knew that if they had the agility to dodge well they may be able to escape a strong adversary. Of course, they also spent time studying the actual course materials and the others, with Ginny's encouragement started trying wandless and non-verbal casting of first year spells. They ended up training or studying during nearly every waking moment but the trio managed to make things fun, turning some of the exercises into games and frequently finding something to burst into giggles over. Life wasn't perfect but there was hope. On Halloween they were left with the delightful surprise of Sirius Black attempting to break into Gryffindor tower and attacking the Fat Lady (Veronica according to Luna) in protest when she refused entry. Apparently, Black was hunting down Harry and had broken out of Azkaban to do just that. The poor kid really did have the worst luck. Ginny had nothing kind to say about the School's security. She vented to Colin and Luna about how Hogwarts was supposed to be the safest place in Britain and yet there hasn't been a year since Harry started where something hadn't gone wrong there. Now Harry was getting even more unwanted attention and Ron, not to be upstaged, started moaning loudly about how unwell Scanners was and how it was Hermione's cat's fault. Luna's insight to this was simply to say "It's interesting that cats and dogs are natural enemies. I wonder what would happen if they were to work together to catch a rat". As interesting as that was, dogs weren't one of the pets allowed at Hogwarts so it wasn't particularly relevant to the point, but that was Luna for you. On the 8th November they bundled up to head out and watch the first quidditch match of the season, Gryffindor versus Hufflepuff. Ginny was anxious leaving the (relative) safety of the castle but the warmth of so many bodies in the spectator stands calmed her. Luna joined her and Colin in the stands and was bundled up in three different Gryffindor scarves that Ginny didn't bother to ask about. The pure happiness and energy radiating off the crowd dulled the presence of the Dementors and Ginny found herself cheering and clapping along enjoying the match. That was until the Dementors came. Colin tried calling forth his Patronus while Luna and Ginny were frozen but produced nothing more than vapour. The warmth of the teachers patroni snapped them out of despair. And then Harry fell.
Ginny took the remainder of the weekend to recover from the attack. She found herself shivering uncontrollably without warning and Tom was just so loud. She felt sick at the thought of the dementors, there had been so many swarming over the pitch. Luna had also been quite shook up but seemed ok after a day's rest but Colin looked after them both all the same. She didn't think she had drank so much hot chocolate in her life. At least the elves made different varieties. Her favourite was rocky road. Bill was also concerned about the security when she wrote to him he suggested speaking to the defence professor about the Patronus charm. Even if he was an unbelievable prick he may be able to help. Ginny grit her teeth, it looked like she had no choice but to ask her least favourite professor to teach her the charm. The following week found the trio knocking on Lupin's door. He invited them with a curt greeting but wasn't the friendly face that other Gryffindors had described. No matter how much Ginny pleaded he insisted that he would not teach them, that it was challenging for NEWT level students and far beyond the skill required to defeat a boggart - Ginny had grit her teeth at that slight - and there was no way she should consider it until OWL year. The meeting did not end amicably and Luna ended the conversation with Lupin as Colin escorted (well dragged) Ginny out of the room.
"You're not who people think you are Professor and that's not a good thing" there was an edge to her usually serene voice.
If Ginny were looking she would have seen him flinch but Luna didn't miss it.
On the bright side, Luna's Dad and Colin's Mum and sent over the information. The advice from the gnomes made absolutely no sense to Ginny or Colin but seemed to be completely clear to Luna who laughed and exclaimed "Of course! How could I not see that?". The books from Colin's Mum were actually very interesting. There were a lot of metaphors that Ginny couldn't wrap her head around but the basic ideas made sense. The main point Ginny took away from the readings was to focus on the happiness or gratitude you feel in doing all things, even if it's the sweetness of a hot chocolate in the evening or the warmth of the shower after a busy day. They practiced voicing their appreciation of things together and the darkness seemed a little further away. Harry, Ron and Hermione should really learn to be more discreet, Ginny thought. Harry had been greatly upset learning that Sirius Black, the infamous murderer, was his God Father and the reason for his parents death and had been alternating between despair and cussing him out in equal measure in their common room. Hermione was shushing him really loudly which only really brought more attention to the corner in which they were huddled and Ron was egging him on loudly. Ginny sighed and packed away her astronomy homework, there was no way she could focus on the lunar cycle with racket they were making. Her family had decided it were safer for all of the children of they stayed at Hogwarts for the Christmas break. Ginny was ecstatic. Although she was sad that Colin and Luna had to leave she would finally have a Christmas where she was free to be herself (last year's Christmas hardly counted with the whole horcrux fiasco). None of the trio really had much money so after some persuasion of Luna's part with the kitchen elves, they decided to each bake the others their Christmas gifts. The elves were happy to help when they explained the purpose and even gave some handy tips. Ginny made sharp spiced gingerbread dipped in chocolate. Luna made fluffy light profiteroles decorated in different colours and Colin made some brownies according to his Nan's special recipe. They enjoyed the treats together huddled next to the warmth of the kitchen fireplace before they parted.
Ginny had saved some of the treats to eat by the Gryffindor fire on Christmas Eve. The remaining people who had stayed (mainly her family) had retired long before her. She had pretended to go to bed to avoid the lecture from Percy about taking care of one's health and then snuck down. The warmth of the fire and the treats from her friends soon made her feel sleepy. She retired to a cosy bed in solitude for the first time in ages and drifted off into a peaceful sleep.
She awoke to a few gifts at the end of her bed. She had the usual jumper from mum, pink again. Yes she was female, she got it. How could she possible forget? Aside from that she had a relatively superficial letter and a small tin of fudge from her parents. Not that she expected much else, there had been quite a distance between them since last year. After that she still had a few gifts to open. Some chocolate frogs from Harry (it was sweet of him to send her anything really), some sugar quills from Hermione and some rock cakes from Hagrid. Contrary to popular belief his rock cakes we actually quite delicious and more than edible when dunked in a large mug of hot chocolate. Surprisingly there was a gift from Snape. There was no note but who else would give her an annotated copy of her first year potions assignments, not with answers but with highlighted areas of what could be improved? Ginny flicked through it with awe, she could never of anticipated how much she was enjoying potions. Finally, she unwrapped a small gift from Bill and Charlie. The wrapping had little Swedish Short snouts flying across the paper. Inside was a dragon fang necklace with some runes to ward off ill thoughts and bring clarity. She could almost feel Tom quietening just a little when she slipped it around her neck. It was perfect.
The rest of the day was equal parts bliss and frustration. Percy kept an annoyingly close watch on her throughout the day and she was forced to sit out with him while the others enjoyed a furious snowball fight in the grounds. Apparently she was too delicate and he didn't want to risk her catching a cold. Though, from the side-lines she had the perfect opportunity to practice her elemental magic. The wind was the perfect cover to practice wind control and couldn't help but laugh delightedly when she directed a stray snowball straight into Percy's face. Her laughter went unnoticed as Percy marched over to the twins and started yelling only to get covered from head to toe in snow in response. Finally, after the feast she escaped claiming a headache and cold and was allowed up to the solitude of her dorm. Enthused by her earlier breakthrough she opened her window and practiced bringing snowflakes into the room. They swirled and danced before dissolving in the heat.

Wow – what a month it's been. I have barely had time to think yet alone do anything else. I'm leaving a very stressful job shortly so should have much more time to post!
Hope you're all staying safe and well.
Thank you Brick88 for your great comments! I've always seen Lupin to be quite wrapped up in his own world. He never seemed to make enough of an effort to contact Harry after Sirius dies. A lot of the fics I have read tend to keep him as a sympathetic character who has matured greatly since his school years so I liked the idea of doing something a little different and having a man who still has that streak of selfishness and disregard for others that they had in their school years. I think this fits nicely into Snape's dynamic. As a spy I think Snape would know better than anyone some of the things Ginny went through when she was possessed by the horcrux and is trying to help her, in his own way. I think the dislike of Lupin also works in her favour leading her to be the only Gryffindor who has won his support. In my version, I envision that prolonged possession by a horcrux leads to the horcrux poisoning a part of your own mind and turning it against you. There are now cells in Ginny's brain which are effectively a carbon copy of Tom's soul. Though they have no magical powers, they hold his memories, thoughts and malice. This acts a bit like schizophrenia as she now has another voice in her head which she cannot control.
~ Fiona