MESSAGE TO READERS:

Thank you to all the new fans and followers that have been sticking to my story Wonderment. I love writing it and can't wait to update it more! This chapter is dedicated to caroline7ramirez. During my writing hiatus, she never stopped contacting me asking me to please update. Though I reassured her many times I would definitely complete Wonderment, I never updated. But that didn't stop her from re-reading chapters for fun, reviewing, and contacting me. See reviews matter people! She definitely kicked me back into gear to get on top of updating, so without further delay here's the next chapter. Oh! And please do R&R. IT MAKES A DIFFERENCE!

Chapter 22- Cat Got Your Tongue?

Adam

We all waited around the lobby of the inn while Eric went to the concierge to request a carriage to take Belle and me back to our dormitory. I knew the ride would be an opportunity for Belle and me to be alone together, and the thought made me nervous yet excited all at the same time.

Ariel asked, "So what else is new with you both? How is your project coming along?"

Belle and I exchanged a look as we both shrugged. "It's coming," Belle replied.

I added, "It's off to a good start. We've done a lot since the last time we worked on it. It needs a few tweaks here and there, but I think it will be solid by the time it's due."

"Adam is a brilliant writer." Belle's compliment almost made me blush.

"Really? Adam? I had no idea," Ariel said.

"It's really Belle's research skills that give the project our meat," I added, trying to deflect the attention off of me. I was never good with receiving compliments. "Her knack for gathering information and my knack for writing I guess…makes us the perfect team." There was some hesitance in the last couple of words. Perhaps because I was feeling that we could be a perfect team in more ways than just Sonnet Project partners. I wondered if my true feelings were noticeable or not. Belle was always polite, so it was hard to tell.

"That's great! I haven't even started, or even contacted my partner!" Ariel exclaimed.

"Well, you have loads of time to turn it in," I said "Meanwhile, I'm stuck with a partner that wants to get a head start on everything. If she could have, I bet she would have tried to walk the day after she was born!" I added jokingly, gesturing with my thumb towards Belle. Ariel giggled.

"Ha-ha! Very funny," Belle said, rolling her eyes. "By the way, who is your partner, Ariel?" asked Belle

"Cinderella, I think," Ariel replied.

"Cinderella! I just met her today!" Belle exclaimed, and went on to tell Ariel about meeting Cinderella, Tiana, and the others at brunch.

Eric returned and informed us that all the carriages were currently out on the roads, but that the desk clerk had assured him that the next one available would take us back to the dorms. As Belle continued telling Ariel about the sorority girls, Eric motioned me to come outside the inn. He sat down on a bench outside while I stood nearby.

"Thought we could wait out here for the carriage and give the girls some privacy," Eric said.

I nodded and put my hands in my pockets.

"So, are you thinking about telling Belle the truth of your double identity any time soon?" asked Eric.

"Are you going to tell Ariel you know about her father's multiple attempts to assassinate you?" I countered.

"Ah, touché!" he conceded. He stretched out his legs, looking more relaxed. .

I sighed and looked up at the sky. "I want to tell her, but I wouldn't know where to begin," I admitted. "I don't know how she would react. I'm afraid she'd hate me and never talk to me again."

"Why do you say that?" he asked.

"Because it will come off as if I lied to her. The start of our friendship was a little prickly, to say the least. It still is from time to time. Me announcing that I am actually the disguised guest she serves at work personally and confides in, but I never told her? It will make things plummet to the worst. I just know it."

Eric was shaking his head in disbelief. "I can't understand how you are always so pessimistic."

"Well, I can't fathom how you manage to be so damn optimistic all the time, so I guess we're both equally mystified," I replied. Eric winced at the belligerent sarcasm in my tone. He sighed and headed over to me.

"Adam, just think about it. She might even feel grateful. After all, you helped her with the job prospect and even saved her from that group of rowdy men you were talking about the last time. She might look at you in a whole different light," he said encouragingly.

I didn't know whether Eric was right or not. I wish I could see the future and see how Belle would react if I were to tell her, but that's not possible! I sighed. I didn't know if I could do it. How was I supposed to tell her who I really was and how I truly felt?

"When I first heard there was a guest to see me, you know who I thought it was?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

"Who?"

"My father."

Eric shuddered melodramatically. "Wow! That would've been a disaster!"

"Definitely!"

"A catastrophe!"

"Noted."

"A fucking fiasco!"

"OK seriously? Enough with the pathetic attempt at alliteration and melodrama," I said, rolling my eyes.

"Has he not written nor sent Cogsworth to check on you?" Eric asked. My father always made Cogsworth spy on me. I liked Cogsworth, but his annoyance only increased when he did the bidding of my father's work, like checking up on me unannounced.

I shook my head. "Nope. I can only presume Lumiere keeps Cogsworth updated."

The last time I had seen my father or even talked to him was during the summer break, and even then we hardly spoke. Typical. Eric knew the strain in our relationship, and it was nice for once not having to explain every detail of my life when I needed to vent, get a point across, or just have a conversation when it came to my family.

"Anyway, looks like your carriage is approaching," Eric pointed out as we heard the sound of horses' hoof beats in the distance.

"Well, mate, it was good to see you. It's been awhile since we last saw each other," I said, shaking his hand.

"I know, Adam," he said as he shook mine, reaching over with his free hand to pat my back. "I'll come by and visit as often as I can while I'm here in France," he promised.

I chuckled, "Don't worry about it. Ariel and you deserve this alone time together. Take advantage of it."

Eric smiled, but then his expression changed to one of concern. "Think about what I said, Adam. I know I don't know Belle that well, but from the few hours I've gotten to know her, she seems really sweet and very sincere. I think she would understand if you admit to you being her tavern customer."

"We'll see," I hedged.

"Okay. But I think the sooner you tell her, the better the outcome will be," Eric said. He went inside to get Belle and Ariel.

As the carriage slowed to a halt, I opened the door. Eric's words were still echoing in my mind. As I peered into the carriage I knew there would be two possible scenes that could happen here once Belle and I were seated inside: either I would profess my feelings and secret identity to Belle, or I would lose my nerve, say nothing, and go to the dormitory leaving things the way they were.

The girls came out, and Ariel hugged Belle, saying "I'm so excited for you! I hope you get into the sorority!"

"Me too - that is, if I do decide to go on Thursday. Oh, Ariel, can't you come?" pleaded Belle.

"I'm sorry," Ariel replied sympathetically, looking at Eric. "I wish I could, but Eric's only here till next weekend, and I want to spend every minute I can with him. I hope you understand."

"Of course I do," Belle said. She was smiling, but her eyes showed great disappointment. "It's just that I don't really know anyone there." I noticed that she was rubbing her fingers together, something I had noticed she often did unconsciously when she felt nervous or anxious.

"You'll be fine. Besides, from what you said, Cinderella sounds really nice, and so does Tiana. Hearing about Cinderella from you reassures me that she's going to be a great Sonnet Project partner," Ariel said encouragingly.

Belle managed a smile as Ariel hugged her again. If there was anything I could always expect from Ariel, it was her amazing talent at always making someone feel better. I shook hands with Eric and we said our goodbyes. I helped Belle into the carriage, then got in and took the seat across from her. We waved goodbye to Eric and Ariel from the carriage. "Don't stay up too late now, you two!" I called jokingly. I chuckled as I looked over at Belle, who had her fingers on her lips trying to suppress a laugh. I had thought she might be offended by the remark, but it was nice to know she had an easygoing side and a sense of humor. It made me realize even more why I liked her so much. Every day was a new discovery, and every day with her brought excitement.

"Isn't this ironic, Belle?" I asked.

"What is?"

"We're waving goodbye to the two sole heirs of Cyprus," I replied.

She was puzzled. "Why is that ironic?"

"Ever heard of a kingdom having two heirs?"

Finally getting the contradiction, she chuckled. "I truly wish them the best. Their love is too true for them to deserve anything but."

When we arrived at the dorm, I got out, tipped the driver, then returned to Belle's side to open the door and assist her in getting out. She gracefully gathered her dress and stepped out carefully. Just as I was admiring her agility and elegant grace, her last step gave way and in a flash I realized she was losing her balance.

"Ah!" she wailed as she came crashing down on top of me.

"I've got you!" I assured her, catching her in my arms. She fell against my chest, but it didn't budge me at all from where I stood. I peered down, seeing the crown of her hair resting under my chin.

"I'm sorry," she said bashfully, quickly pulling herself from my chest as she collected herself. The last time I had held her that close was at the tavern, seated near the lake, under the moonlight. I realized how much I had missed the feeling of her body so close to my own.

"It's fine." I smiled reassuringly.

Actually I hoped that I hadn't hurt her when I caught her fall. I signaled the driver that we had descended from the carriage. He cracked the whip, and before we knew it, the sound of galloping fainted into the distance. I realized that I still had an arm around Belle's waist, but she didn't seem to mind.

"Seems like you've been tripping a lot today," I teased.

"Seems like it," Belle agreed. There was a long pause, a little uneasy, but exciting at the same time. We just stood there, looking at each other, not saying a word. In that moment, I felt everything was perfect. I was feeling so comfortable, like I could tell her anything or do anything. I had never before felt like this when I was my real self around her; Up until now, I had only felt so open and unguarded in my disguise.

The night had been filled with signs proving that perhaps we were indeed feeling more for each other than just friendship. Perhaps Eric was right. Perhaps this was the chance I needed to take! Perhaps this was what I needed to remind me that I was capable of caring for another, truly, deeply, to the core. Just like my mother did with me, with our family. After all, I might be my father's son, but was I not my mother's son as well?

"Well," Belle started, as she offered a smile.

"Well… I had a nice night with you, Belle," I said as I turned and faced her. My arm was still around her waist. We were talking to each other with closer proximity than usual on this night. Another sign!

"I did too, Adam," she replied. Good, she's not pulling away. She must feel the same!

"It's not just tonight, Belle, it's every night - I mean, every time I spend with you," I amended quickly. "I guess what I mean is…when I'm with you, I always have a nice time."

She looked at me curiously, but then smiled again. "Well, like I said I had a nice night," she reiterated politely as she started to extricate herself from my arm.

"Belle, wait." I cupped her chin to look up at me. She froze, looking like a porcelain doll, gazing up at me in confusion, yet intrigued. It took every fiber of my strength to not lower my lips and plant one on hers. At first I thought she might be expecting it. Normally when I would have my way with women, kissing them was never a challenge. It was easy to tell that they wanted it, because their demeanor would be more than forthcoming. But with Belle, I hesitated. Her body language showed some guardedness.

I brushed my thumb across her cheek. Her skin was as soft and delicate as the clovers that cascaded the fields of the Parthenon in spring - too delicate in fact. It infuriated me to think that just days ago a group of men at the tavern had attacked Belle so roughly. My blood boiled at the thought.

Belle's puzzled and concerned stare quickly prompted me back to the present and I immediately let go of her, getting the hint that she was a little unsettled. She looked even more confused, and the mood had become undoubtedly awkward. I probably looked dumbfounded, foolish in fact, but I managed to collect myself. I coughed a bit as I began to straighten my vest.

"Thank you for accompanying me home," she said, breaking the silence.

"Ahem! Yes well, it was just the gentlemanly thing to do of course," I replied. We began to head towards the dorm.

I was deeply sulking inside. I knew if I didn't tell Belle the truth now, about how I truly felt, I would never find this moment again. Perhaps thiswas just a chance that I had to take. All the signs from her were pointing that I should not convey my true thoughts, but I couldn't help but hear Eric's argument in my head. Maybe if she knew it was me, her tavern hero, all this time she would be okay.

But what if she didn't actually like this tavern hero? What if it was just a hunch Eric was feeling and nothing more? Then again, she was wearing the necklace I had given to her as the cloaked customer, and I knew Belle well enough to know she wasn't the kind who just wore anything without reason. I let out a big sigh, which caught Belle's attention. As she turned to me and me to her, we said each other's names at the same time.

"Belle!"

"Adam!"

She giggled. I smiled.

"I just wanted to ask if you would be up to working on the project tomorrow," she said. "Perhaps finishing it up and tying up any loose ends? I know we're way ahead of schedule but I'd rather get it done sooner than later."

"Yes, yes. Of course. Sounds like a great idea. I can come down to your room?" I offered.

"Great, if that's okay with you."

"Yes, sounds good. I'll bring us some coffee."

"Perfect," she agreed.

"Perfect."

As Belle began to open the door, she still looked confused. "Do you have anything else to say?"

Yes, you do, Adam, say something to her, you coward! I was internally berating myself.

"Yes!" I finally managed to say out loud.

Belle turned towards me, giving me her full attention. How was I supposed to say that I was feeling something towards her? I never had a way with words. It was all action with women. No words. Just action. Never in my life did I find the need to ever exchange such heartfelt words until Belle came into my life. I looked at her pleadingly, and I could tell she was becoming concerned. She closed the door completely now behind her, stepping fully back into the hallway.

"Adam what's wrong? What is it you have to tell me?"

"I…I'm sorry."

Belle gave me a puzzled look.

"I never told you that I already knew Ariel," I blurted out. "I remember that when Ariel and I talked in front of you at the Welcome Dance we sounded like we had just met. But as you now know, Ariel and I knew each other from before." I couldn't believe I had chickened out again!

What was wrong with me?

I tried telling myself that it was a valid apology, and it had to be said. After all, Ariel and I did know each other and we were only pretending to be meeting for the first time in front of Belle and the other students at the dance because her relationship with Eric had to be kept a secret. So I had to come forward to Belle about that, so she knew I didn't want to keep the charade of that day going. I mean, it had to be said- but so did something else. I didn't understand why I was feeling so stuck in the moment. I knew what direction I wanted to go, yet I was apprehensive about taking it there.

Belle placed her hand on my shoulder. "Adam, one thing I really like about you is that you're always honest with me. Not many people really know that side about you, do they?"

"I guess," I replied.

Belle smiled. "It's almost as if you put on a disguise for the rest of the world to see."

You have no idea!

"Then again maybe I'm lucky to be one of the few that gets to see this side of you." The way she said it was almost as if she had just realized it.

I smiled at that. It made me feel proud to know that Belle thought of me as honest. I hadn't felt proud about myself in a while.

"Well, I guess you bring out the best in me Belle."

Belle looked bashful and tucked a stray piece of hair behind her ear.

"I figured it out all by myself, you know? After hearing the cautionary love story from our friends tonight, it all occurred to me in an instant. You and Ariel had put on a front at the Welcome Dance for her and Eric's sake. That way, no one would know you were a part of their little secret. You did it to protect them."

I sheepishly rubbed the back of my neck with a little smirk. Damn! I was really impressing my dream girl today.

"You're a loyal friend, too, Adam."

"So when exactly did you figure this all out?" I asked flirtatiously. My hand pressed against the door frame over her head. Her eyes were dancing, and a spark ignited in her demeanor. She took a step closer while holding my gaze, locked.

Impressive.

"Hmm? Maybe…it was during one of those times I tripped?" she said coyly.

I laughed. "Hmm? Too many thoughts in that head of yours, Belle. Don't let them get in the way of your footing."

She giggled again. She had both her hands clasped behind her back. I leaned in lower, and all at once I couldn't resist any longer. We both were feeling it. I could see it her eyes. We wanted to kiss each other. All those days of pining after her, whether I was disguised or not and whether she knew it was me or not, came down to this moment.

Before I could do it, though, Belle made the first move. But my excitement was cut short when she merely gave me a peck on the cheek.

"Thanks for a lovely night, Adam. I really needed it. I'm so happy to have a friend like you at the Parthenon." She nodded sweetly as if to say good-bye and disappeared behind the door.

I rubbed my cheek with my hand. She kissed me. Any other day I would have been elated, and though I was to a teeny extent, I was more disappointed. I stood there at the door, dumbfounded. How could I have read the signals wrong? I was sure she was feeling something! I could tell! It was in the tone of her voice, the way her body language responded to my own, and the fire I saw in her eyes that matched the heat of mine. I had never been wrong with women. Then again, Belle had put all my sure theories to test. Perhaps for the first time, I was indeed wrong.

Friend. That's the word she used. Eric was wrong. Coming clean would be to no avail.

Walking to my room was a struggle. Every step made my heart feel heavier and heavier. I kept swearing to myself, frustrated that I didn't take the chance to tell her how I felt! My heart and my brain were at odds at one another. I knew that Belle looked as if she felt the scene of us outside the dorm perhaps a bit awkward, but I felt there was something there between us.

Maybe she just hadn't realized it yet. How could I blame her? She didn't know how much time she was actually spending time with me in my disguise and all. I on the other hand was fully aware, and I had never had the opportunity nor took the time in getting to know another girl as in depth as I had with Belle.

Eric's words were pulsating in my head. Maybe if I had divulged to her that the tavern cloaked customer she served every night was indeed me, then perhaps she would have looked at me in a different light. As I angrily thought this over and over, I began to get more and more frustrated at missing a golden opportunity. I brashly undid my suit, throwing the clothes into the armoire and slamming the door if so hard that the handle nearly knocked off.

I hated when my temper got like this, and I knew when I was in a middle of a mindless fury there was no stopping it - except there was an antidote. Only one though. I went to the cupboard in my small kitchen, and on the highest shelf pulled out a bottle of whiskey, its contents already half gone. It wasn't Scotch, but it would do the trick. It had been there since my freshman year. Considering I had been residing here for almost three years, I was surprised there was any left.

I got a glass, slammed it on the table, and filled it up. I threw the contents of the glass back in one gulp. Every now and then I shot some one-liners at the mirror pretending I was talking to Belle, professing all that was in my heart. Of course at the end of every monologue I chastised myself at every attempt and retreated to the whiskey bottle. I filled the glass yet again and threw back the contents, and finally for a third time. When I was done, I slammed the glass on the table.

Pressing my palms flat on the surface of the table, I looked out to the night. Why did I get into this downward spiral so quickly? Was that really a question? I knew why. The flashback of my father telling me my mom had killed herself all of a sudden came to mind. The man drove her to her death.

The images of my father came to my mind as if I could see him in front of me. The whiskey was working. My body felt like it was standing next to a wood-fire furnace. I was beginning to remember my father's wrath when he would go on lecturing me, telling me that I was a disappointment and how sad he was that he had no other son to bear his name but me. I remember the many times he used his fists to teach me a lesson. Teach me a lesson. Pssh! That's what he called it.

I could feel my body losing control and letting go and the hallucinations beginning to appear, trumping all my logic. All of a sudden I could see my father appear in front of me. Yup, the whiskey, along with the earlier inebriants from the dinner that night, was doing its magic! All of a sudden I heard him scream profanities defaming my self-worth and pride.

"Thank God your mother died rather than to see you like this, in this ungodly wretched state."

"Fuck you!" I growled, coming to my senses to the present. I hurled my glass against the wall, remembering how my father never failed to remind me that my mother was better off dead than to witness me at my worst.

Thank you to Trudi Rose for Beta Reading this chapter!