Another world meeting. "Boom! Oh yeah baby!!!" Alfred cheered, reading over the message sent by his boss that stated he would be the next host. While meetings were a drag, he loved being host, and this was definitely a meeting he wanted to be in charge of.
It was that time of the year to talk about their new weapons and defense capabilities. Not to leak government secrets or trade tech or anything. It was sort of like what him and Russia does with nukes, notifying each other so no one gets surprised or threatened, to keep the peace as they say. Though no one wants to mention that it is meant to be threatening, to deter others from thinking about trying anything stupid. That keeps the peace all on its own. Hopefully anyway.
Alfred likes to use it to gloat about how awesome and strong his military is. With how advanced it is and continues to get, he always gets to wow everyone with flashy presentations and with multiple at a time. Just this year alone he's got plenty in the works, most likely not able to fit within his allotted time. He'll leave out the early prototypes and concepts for now.
As he wrote through his presentation he thought about what he should talk about. 'Abrams X? No, they're still building their prototype. Same with the B-21. Ninja Missile? It was made public a couple years ago, though I doubt the nations know about it. Yes sir. The new service rifle is still waiting for a company to win the military contract. Rapid Dragon. ...Maybe. Dark Eagle... they don't need to know about that yet.'
Chewing the end of his pencil he struggled to make an intro. With how many he's done it was near impossible to make a unique one anymore. He didn't want to end up like Germany, who just flatly stated the same thing word for word whenever he was host. It put him to sleep like nothing else.
He sat at his desk for about twenty minutes, nearly eating the pencil's eraser as he got frustrated, coming up with nothing. Eventually he had to call it quits and go onto something else. He could come back to it later, and if all else fails he'll come up with something on the spot like usual.
With nothing else to do he read over the briefing with info on the meeting. It starts in one week. 'Way to state the obvious,' he thought. It was to take place in Denver, Colorado, where they are expected to stay inside with personal rooms to accommodate everyone, either alone or with family, as the city is expected to receive a lot of snow, on top of what they already had. It's funny given a lot of the rest of the country is supposed to be unusually warm for the week.
Wait, snow? Suddenly lightbulbs were going off in his head. A week of boring meetings, snowed in with nothing to do, tons of people who want to get away from work...
Snow Day.
He remembered back on his road trip he suggested they do something fun one of these meetings, like have a snowball fight or build a snow fort. Natalya thought it was a horrible idea, but the opportunity was too good to pass up. It certainly beats having to prepare some boring opening speech.
He'll prepare all sorts of activities. First he should make a big battlefield for a snowball fight, with even more trenches and huge forts, though maybe he should leave the forts for the nations to build themselves. Then he'll remove all the coffee and tea from the break room and replace them with a bunch of packets of hot chocolate. Yeah, that's good, and there will be a ton of marshmallows and whipped cream too, with plenty of treats like cookies and whatever those really good chocolate wafer stick things are.
Oh, and he should get a bunch of snowball makers, so everyone can make a ton and make the snowball fight get real crazy. Alfred chuckled to himself pridefully as he feverishly scribbled down his plan, jotting down whatever popped into his head. Nothing was off the table.
Turning on his computer he quickly typed up an email for the nations (because some of them are complete old farts that refuse to join Alfred's group chat) requesting that they dress extra warm. In only a few minutes he got plenty of messages asking why, given they are supposed to be in a warm building the whole time so what's the point? So he reasoned that it was simply better to be on the safe side, which immediately raised eyebrows and brought more questions with it.
He didn't really reply to anyone after that, as he was already putting his plan into action. This was going to be the best meeting ever!
The sixth of January, the first meeting of the new year, and oh what a meeting it would be. Alfred giggled to himself mischievously as he lifted up and tossed the last shovelful of snow behind him, sticking the shovel upright in the snow and resting his arm on its handle.
He looked over his work in pride. Long, winding trenches and shallow barricades stretching for a good fifty feet or so. Snow makers littered the would-be battlefield, ready for the nations to snatch up. The snow removed from the trenches now sat in big piles, which would be useful for the respective teams when they build their forts.
With a sniff Alfred wiped his runny nose, tossing the shovel into one of the snow piles and walking away to grab a big group of sleds and drag them off toward a large hill a little ways behind the snowball arena. It couldn't be a snow day without sleds, and would be good for those who didn't feel like getting pelted in the face with snowballs.
Once completed, Alfred rested on top of the hill, clumsily fishing out his phone from his pants pocket underneath his snow pants. Checking the time he saw that it was close to 7:30, meaning some of the more punctual nations like Germany and China were already probably starting to arrive.
Standing back up he quickly sped through the snow toward a nearby building, kicking off his snow-covered boots by the door and speeding through to the opposite entrance of the building. He barely had enough time to make hot chocolate and warm up before a few of the nations came through the door.
In this small group were Germany and his brother, the latter probably dragged here to be on time, England, China, and Netherlands silently creeping at the back. And they were all wearing their winter coats and hats, though along with other accessories like scarves and snow pants, which they opted to carry or keep in their suitcases rather than walk around in in a warm building.
The moment they noticed Alfred relaxing away in a warm chair, wearing nothing but a t-shirt and sweatpants and looking excitedly at them from behind a mug of something warm, they were already on his ass.
"Alright fess up, just what kind of bloody plan are you up to?" England barked with an accusatory point of his finger. "Why have you got us sweltering in these stuffy clothes while you're lounging around like everything's fine and dandy?"
"And where is your suit?!" China roared. "We're here for meetings not some slumber party. How can you be so unprofessional?"
Alfred raised his eyebrows curiously at the idea of a slumber party with the nations, then furrowed them tightly as he began scheming. "Don't give him more ideas," Germany warned while putting a hand on China's shoulder. At once they all began taking off their winter clothes, except for the Netherlands, who always has his coat and scarf.
Alfred burst out laughing once seeing that Germany, England, and China were all wearing their full suits. He could've sworn he saw steam rising off of them. "No wonder you guys are so hot. You're all completely dressed up. Why don't you all go change into normal clothes."
"Absolutely not. That's not even on the table unless you tell us what's going on," England argued. Though he stopped pressing when he and all the nations noticed Prussia taking off his clothes to reveal he too was in a t-shirt and pants, though now while striking a smug expression.
"Did he tell you vhat he's up to?" Germany inquired, the frustration already building in his voice. Prussia shook his head and put his hands on his hips. "Nope. But unlike you losers mein awesome brain vas able to figure it out."
Netherlands hummed in agreement behind them, Prussia turning him in surprise. "You caught on too?" Netherlands looked at him blankly, as uninterested as ever. "Give me twenty euros and maybe I'll tell you." Prussia grimaced, a hand clutching his wallet in his pocket like Netherlands simply speaking was going to send his money flying away.
Germany could only groan. "Great, if my brozher can tell vhat America is planning, zhen it can't be anysing good." Prussia was quick to snap back. "On zhe contrary Vest, zhis sounds like it's going to be awesome."
The younger brother flinched at that cursed word. He felt like he was going to cry. Just one meeting, just one. Normal. Meeting. That's all he asks for. In defeat he lowered his head and walked off toward the empty meeting room, accepting his fate.
England and China were still nervous about what was coming, especially now with Prussia in the know. So when more nations began to file in they expressed their concerns with the others, who were similarly on edge.
From his chair Alfred spectated as the nations conversed amongst each other. Plenty of them were worried or angry, while some were excited, likely also figuring out what was to come, and a lot of them didn't seem to care either way.
Eventually Russia had arrived, followed closely by his sisters. Alfred smiled happily into his mug, but made an effort not to let his eyes linger for too long. He would rather not have Russia pick up on him eye fucking their sister.
Soon enough the few stragglers remaining had arrived, so Alfred got up from the chair and prepared to enter the meeting room, when Finland bursted through the door with a murderous expression. "Which one of you fuckers replaced all the coffee with hot chocolate!!!"
All the nations that hadn't entered the meeting room slowly turned their heads to Alfred, who didn't look any less relaxed. "You must have a damn death wish to do something as brain dead as that!" Finland raged as he stomped toward the guilty nation.
"Relaaax, Fin my man," Alfred coaxed while resting an arm on the shorter man's shoulders. "Language, first of all, don't be a hypocrite. We all know Sealand is lurking around here somewhere. But also, enjoy the sweet stuff dude, it'll wake you up just the same. I even got cookies and stuff." He took a second to inspect the man, their face red and eyes ferocious. It didn't even look like Finland anymore. "Plus I think we should ween you off the stuff man."
"I don't want hot chocolate or "sweet stuff", I want coffee! Now!" Finland demanded, stamping his foot. Alfred looked through the open doors to the meeting room, spotting Sweden looking back at him. Sweden eyed Finland on their rampage, then back at Alfred, closing his eyes and giving him a slow shake of his head.
With no other choice Alfred sighed. "I hid them in a cupboard. Upstairs first room to the left." Immediately Finland was gone, probably eating coffee grounds raw by now. "Remind me to never get between a Finn and his coffee," Alfred whispered to himself.
Though with that distraction out of the way, he put back on a happy face and marched into the meeting, taking his place at the podium while everyone found their seats. Reading over his note cards he waited for a few more moments before he began to speak.
"Nations of the world. I, America, greatest country ever, present to you as host— yadda fricken yadda, first meeting of 2021— blah blah blah." He threw his note cards behind his head and slammed his hands on the top of the podium's surface. "I'm guessing you guys are more interested in why I emailed y'all, right?" He got a few nods in the crowd, others leaning forward in their chairs with interest.
"Well, we all know that meetings are a complete drag, especially the first day when we have to get through the introduction and crap, even if it's a cool topic like this one. And since I would be going first I'd totally blow you all away with my weapons and leave the rest of the meetings boring by comparison."
A few angry looks and mumbles rose up from the crowd, but he continued before anyone could start an argument with him. "So, in order to cut down on the crazy amount of time we have for these meetings, I figured we could use this first meeting day foooorrrr..." he trailed off, fumbling with something under the desk, pulling out a large, dripping wet white clump. "A snow day!"
He then tossed the melting ball of snow high up in the air, falling somewhere into the crowd with someone crying out with a loud "ack!"
There was silence for a few seconds, before a wave of applause and cheers came from some of the nations. A good few loved the idea and wanted to have some fun, but most of the group just played along because they wanted any excuse to get out of work. Luckily it was a large and loud enough group to block out any protests from those more serious.
Alfred jumped for joy and pumped his fists. "Oh yeah! This is gonna be so awesome!" Once it had eventually quieted down he gave out instructions. "Ok then, let's get everyone out of those stuffy suits, then put on your winter clothes and meet me out back behind the building. Anyone who doesn't have snow pants or gloves I've got extra in the other room."
After that everyone broke away from each other to get ready, even the micronations came out of their hiding spots to join in. Except Molossia, who got himself a gallon's worth of hot chocolate and hunkered down somewhere warm and cozy. Though maybe he'll join later if he feels left out.
With his short speech over Alfred walked around checking on people and collecting his own clothes, which he had tossed into the corner near the podium, though with his back turned he didn't notice Germany marching angrily toward him until their hand had come down hard on his shoulder.
Looking behind him he just smiled. "Oh hey man, need something? You look like you're about to burst." Germany basically screamed behind his closed mouth. Slowly uncurling his closed fist he sighed and rubbed the side of his head with two fingers. "Zhis is an important meeting, America. This is sensitive information that takes time to debrief, and your idea... is to vaste a day playing in zhe snow?!"
Alfred laughed in disbelief. "It takes time? Dude we're talking about weapons. If I'm trying I can get through all my stuff in an hour, tops. We don't need a whole week to talk about what takes a day at most."
"Zhen vhy vaste time vhen ve can do it right now? Save everyvone plenty of time later," Germany reasoned. He knew from past experience that the nations would never stay focused long enough to get through all that in a single day. But he figured he'd let Alfred figure out that flaw on his own.
But to Germany's horror Alfred shrugged and gave an irritated look. "Well first meeting days are like Mondays at school. Nobody wants to do anything on those days."
"You've never been to school!" Germany screamed. Alfred picked at the ear closer to the German and started walking with his winter clothes in his other hand. "Not true, England had me homeschooled. Trust me, that dude is like every worst teacher combined." Arriving at the back door he spun around and faced the other man.
"Look, these meetings are starting to get really boring. Like so much that it corrupts my daydreaming and makes those boring too. I know a bunch of others feel the same. We do this every month, talking about the same boring things ad nauseam. Can't we all just take a break, for one single day? Just one."
Germany took Alfred's request into consideration, before leaning in with a skeptical look. "Zhis isn't all just some big ploy because you didn't prepare for zhe meeting, right?"
With a roll of his eyes Alfred smiled. "No, nothing like that. You should know I'm always ready for the January meetings. My stuff is the coolest."
"Prove it," Germany challenged, thoughtfully holding his chin between his thumb and index finger. Alfred frowned a bit, pausing in putting on his coat. "I mean, if you want to leave me with less material and make these meetings even more boring."
Putting on his coat all the way he went quiet, thinking back over his talking points before looking at Germany. "Fine. So you know the hellfire missile I got? The one you launch from helicopters and drones and shit?" Germany nodded along, deciding to just ignore the "shit" Alfred was referring to. "Of course. I assume zhis is anozher variant?"
Alfred nodded and continued. "Yeah. This one's pretty cool. It was made public in 2019, used covertly for years before that, and thought up way back during the Cold War. Real long ride, super confidential covert secret stuff, so you know my government saw some potential in this. Anyway, I call this thing the "Ninja Missile."
Germany's eyebrows nearly rose up into his head, Alfred smirking cockily. "Ah. See, now you're interested. Should've waited for my presentation for the slideshow." From the corner of his eyes he noticed basically everyone had filed into the room, so he turned and opened the door to go outside, still looking at Germany.
"It's actually not a missile, technically. It doesn't have a warhead. That's so the ninjas don't blow up," he said in earnest, Germany whipping his head around with a bewildered "huh?"
He nodded like anything he had just said made sense. "Uh huh. There are six little ninjas that sit inside, then once the missile is launched they all stick their mini swords out the sides and slice up whatever they land on." He made a few whipping motions with his held hands, like he was wielding an invisible sword. Germany grumbled and held his head. He should've known this would be the result.
"I blame you. You enable him," China whispered, leaning over toward Japan, who shrugged in response. "I rike his creativity. He thinks outside the box." China's mouth formed a line. "Oh, you mean like the bat bomb? Is that out of the box enough for you?"
Japan shuddered, though if it was disgust or genuine fear there was no way of telling. "We don't talk about the bat bomb," he grimaced, holding himself. China only nodded and gave a disapproving hum. "I think he needs to stick inside the box a little more often, aru."
"Alright!" Alfred shouted, stopping and spinning on his feet to face the nations. He spread his arms out wide, his snowy creation behind him. "I welcome you all to the beginning of the most awesome snow day ever! Right here we've got an arena for a snowball fight, which I'll elaborate on in a sec, then over there is a big hill for sledding, and everywhere else is free for you to do whatever you want. Build forts, snowmen, snow angels, anything your weird brains can come up with. We've also got hot chocolate and snacks and stuff inside, which I'm sure you've all seen already, in case you guys get too cold."
He paused as he spotted Philippines on his phone, likely on social media like usual, before looking back to the main group. "Oh and that reminds me, let's try and avoid using our phones if we can. We can't have a kickass snow day if our noses are stuck in our phones."
"Are you sure zhat's a good idea? Vhat if our bosses contact us?" Germany questioned, some other nations nodding along with equal concern. Alfred rolled his eyes and smiled. "I'm not saying to like, shut down your phone or anything. Just don't waste away the whole day on it. We don't need anymore doom and gloom from the news or social media on our "chill" day."
He couldn't help but laugh at his little pun, though all he earned from the crowd were grumbles. "Oh come on, there's no need to be so... "cold"."
"That wasn't creative at all," England critiqued harshly. "Now what is it you want to tell us about this snowball fight? Before your comedy act scares all of us back inside." Natalya glared at the Brit from the corner of her eye. She really hated it when England gave Alfred that constant, condescending tone of his. Though she had to agree to a degree. She's heard enough of Alfred's puns to know they're all dreadful.
"Right, so I am thinking we have two modes: two teams and free for all. We can choose whichever we want to do, but for this first round I'm gonna put us in teams because there's something we gotta do first," Alfred began to explain, turning around and pointing at the sides of the battlefield.
"You see those two big snow mounds? After I split up the teams you'll each have one hour to use them to build your snow fort and prepare snowballs with them. You can use more snow if you use up what's in the mound, but let's be honest there's no way we're gonna be that coordinated to make a fort that big."
Scanning over the group to make sure everyone was paying attention, he nodded and grinned at them all. "And that's everything. Anyone that wants to sled or whatever is free to go. Everyone else gather around so I can pick teams."
Afterwords all the nations began walking in all directions, a large group going off to do their own thing while the others gathered around Alfred, watching as he pulled out his phone and opened to a wheel with all their names on it.
Clicking on the wheel they all watched as it spun around rapidly, before slowing down and landing on England. "Alright dude, you're on Team 1."
"Japan, Team 2." Japan nodded and walked off to the side opposite of England.
"Russia, Team 1." Russia giggled and skipped off toward England. "Seems we fight alongside each other once more, comrade."
"Oh joy," England grumbled. He looked across to the other team as Germany joined Japan. This was starting to look oddly familiar. "Now isn't zhis nostalgic," a voice called out from his right, annoyingly French.
Already dreading what was to come he turned his head, seeing France fast approaching. He angrily gnawed at his bottom lip. "Oh... joy."
"Ok I swear this isn't planned, Italy you're also on Team 2," Alfred declared, Italy cheering and running off toward his Axis friends.
"Sweden, Team 1."
"Greece, Team 2."
"Switzerland, Team 1."
"Myself, Team 2."
"Na— Belarus! Team 1." Alfred corrected himself, Natalya twitched and her eyes went wide, frantically looking between Alfred and the rest of the group, who luckily didn't seem to notice. Alfred tried his best not to look at anyone and carried on.
After a few minutes the teams were assembled as follows:
Team 1:
England
Russia
France
Sweden
Switzerland
Belarus
China
Prussia
Romano
Ukraine
Denmark
Canada
Philippines
Austria
Turkey
Taiwan
Poland
New Zealand
Estonia
Latvia
Team 2:
Japan
Germany
Italy
Greece
America
Belgium
Hungary
Spain
Vietnam
Cuba
Seychelles
Netherlands
Finland
Lithuania
Sealand
Norway
Australia
Scotland
Korea
Monaco
Once split apart, and at the sound of Alfred's order, they all began building their forts.
"Teams of twenty. Can't imagine this will end well," Norway said, sitting on top of a trench and watching the other team as they built their fort.
"Even then most people left to go sledding or went inside to eat. Imagine if all 200 or so of us were fighting," Alfred responded as he hauled a block off the snow pile and handed it to Spain, who then handed it further down a long chain of nations, all while Germany gave the orders on which blocks went where.
"Oooh, do you think everyone will join?" Sealand asked, popping out from behind the snow mound with a handful of snow in his arms. Alfred smiled and pressed a snow brick maker back into the mound, creating another large block. "I'm sure they will, once they see how much fun they're missing out on."
"I think they're having enough fun just watchin' de fight," Scotland interjected, pointing back at the nations gathered on a balcony, hot chocolate in hand as they watched the two sides build up their defenses.
"Keep starin' an relaxin' as de rest of us slave away, ye fokkin bawbags," he yelled as he whipped his arm forward, whirling a snowball at the second floor, narrowly missing the nations and exploding against the brick wall. "Useless shites, the lot of ye!"
"Hey, language," Finland warned as he approached, his head tilting toward Sealand. Scotland gave an exasperated flail of his arm and frowned. "We all heard yer potty mouth earlier." Turning his head he gave Sealand a serious look. "Don't go trustin' that friendliness he shows ye. A real piece of work that one is."
Sealand just laughed along, probably finding Scotland's accent more funny than anything else. Finland was less than impressed, putting his hands on his hips. "And what about you? You're certainly more cranky than usual."
"It's those dam— dang nations lounging about all condescendin' like, while we work our ar— butts off."
"They're hot weather nations, can't you see? They're probably interested but don't want to stay out too long," Norway theorized. "It's a wonder how those like Cuba or the Philippines are managing right now."
Hearing his name, Cuba walked over from his place inside a trench and crossed his arms, resting them on the snow next to Norway. "I eat ice cream all the time, so I'm used to the cold at this point. Plus, the hard work keeps me warmed up. I never thought I'd be fortifying a trench again."
"Tell me about it," everyone in the vicinity around him said in unison, except for Alfred and Sealand, for obvious reasons.
"Greece, quit lounging about and help build zhe fort," Germany ordered, stomping over to the man lying on the ground flicking snow. Greece met Germany's stern eyes with his disinterested one, flicking a little more snow. "Who needs forts anyway? Enjoy the snow."
"Vhy join zhe snowball fight if you vill not do anysing?" Germany wondered, Greece shrugging nonchalantly. "Seemed to be the most fun." Germany stared at the lazy man stoically, hoping to intimidate him into getting up. Unfortunately Greece was more than content to keep relaxing, putting his hands behind his head and closing his eyes.
With a sigh Germany reached down and grabbed a handful of snow, tossing it at Greece's head. After the snow exploded against his face, Greece slowly opened one eye and looked back at the German, waiting for whatever it was they had to say.
"Look, Turkey is on zhe ozher team. Help out vith zhe fort and I'll make sure our team leaves him for you to take care of by yourself. Does zhat vork?" Germany purposed.
Greece opened his other eye and looked off, thinking deeply about the proposition. Finally he shrugged again and sat up. "I suppose I could put off my nap for one round."
Germany let out a sigh of relief as Greece got up and walked off toward the fort. He wondered how the other team was getting on, likely facing the same problems as him. Turning his head he observed the other team across the field.
"Russia! Stop knocking down the bloody fort! We're trying to build it!" England raged, trying to lead his dysfunctional team. "But if the walls are so fragile then how will they protect us from enemy?" Russia inquired, standing within the ruins of a fort wall.
"It's snow! It isn't meant to be— You know what? Whatever, you're on trench duty now," England ordered, before quickly whipping around. "Belarus, stop putting rocks in the snowballs!"
"How can we win if we don't incapacitate our enemies?" She wondered, truly her brother's sister. England pinched the bridge of his nose, deciding it was best to ignore them.
"Sweden? Sweden?!" He called out, looking around for the tall man, who was ironically nowhere to be seen. "Yes?" A deep voice bellowed from behind England, the man flinching and slowly turning around. "Oh, there you are. How's the fort looking?"
"It will do. If Russia stays away," Sweden spoke shortly. "It will do? Don't sell yourself short man it's looking great!" Denmark loudly proclaimed while marching up to the two, slapping a hand down on Sweden's shoulders. "The big guy was making windows to throw snowballs from, escape tunnels, he even made a whole ass second floor with stairs so we could hit them above. Tell them Sweden!"
Sweden kept his mouth shut, turning his head and looking over toward the fort. 'I do not want to gloat. It makes me embarrassed. But that's alright, they'll see for themselves soon enough,' he thought, a tiny smile gracing his lips.
At the feeling of something tugging his sleeve England turning around, seeing Canada standing behind him. "Oh, my apologies I didn't hear you approach." Canada hummed indifferently, used to that response, and pointed behind him. "I finished my side of the fort."
Following where they were pointing, England found a defensive wall about twice the height and length of the half built and broken one on the other side. "Oh! Well, very good," England complimented as he patted their shoulder. "See if you can't get the others to finish their side."
With a smile Canada turned to run off, before abruptly stopping and turning back around skeptically. "You do know I'm not America, right?" England looked suddenly startled, shaking his head. "Nonono of course I know. . . Canada."
Canada lit up immensely at that, grinning ear to ear as he left, passing France who was quickly hiding their phone with the word "Canada" on it. After he had left earshot France walked over to England. "You seriously need to stop zhat. It breaks 'is 'eart you know."
"Don't remind me," England grumbled while hanging his head. France frowned and slapped the back of the other man's head. "I will keep reminding you ozherwise you'll forget, zhat's zhe problem here. I don't know 'ow you always mistake 'im, but not Amérique and Australia, zhose two are practically zhe same."
"No they aren't. They don't even look alike," England argued, before both the men were distracted by the echo of two obnoxious, very similar laughs. Looking toward the noise they saw Alfred and Australia joking around with each other, laughing loudly and their near identical cowlicks sticking out of their hats and bobbing along with their laugh.
"Yes, not alike at all," France spoke mockingly while walking away, England giving an exhausted sigh as he followed after.
After the hour was done the two teams sat in a tense silence, waiting behind their base and in the trenches for the battle to start, their eyes darting around the frontline at all their enemies. Despite the freezing cold a few of the nations seemed to be visibly sweating, water dripping off their chins into the snow. This battle was going to be more intense than Alfred predicted.
Slowly he climbed out of his trench and stepped into no man's land in the center between both teams. "Ok everyone, the fight will start on go! One..." Everyone collectively tensed up, pinpointing who they wanted to throw at first. "Two..." Snowballs were gathered and raised. "Three..." Arms winded back. Nations smiled or glared at each other, itching to let loose.
"Go!" Alfred yelled as he darted back toward his defenses. In an instant a flurry of snowballs filled the sky and began to rain down on both sides. Alfred just barely dived into a trench before the snowballs began pummeling the ground all around him. He couldn't contain his holler of excitement. "This is awesome!"
He was surprised anyone could hear him, given how loud it immediately got, people shouting all sorts of orders or yelling at those on the other side.
While crouched down he made his way toward the middle, passing by Germany and his angry commanding. "Italy, srow harder dammit!! You aren't hitting anything! I can tell you're going easy on Austria, Hungary, cut it out!" On and on he went like an angry general, all too familiar with this role.
"I can hear that damn potato bastard from here!" Romano said out loud to no one in particular, before narrowly dodging a snowball thrown by said German. "Oi! Why don't you take my fucking head off while you're at it!" Romano raged, slipping into a string of vulgar Italian.
China passed by the angry Italian and looked up at Russia from the trench, the man and his sisters in their own little group. "Russia, we can't hit them if we don't take that wall down!"
"Are you sure? I seem to be just fine," Russia replied as he flung his arm forward, a snowball rocketing into Korea's face and knocking them over. Vietnam grabbed the dazed man by his foot and pulled him down into the trench to avoid getting hit by following strikes.
"Mmm, so they hide like the rats," Russia said as he swatted away a snowball with his hand. "Very well, buy me the moment." He then walked off behind the fort, leaving behind his sisters and China.
Natalya took one moment to glance down at China standing in the trench, before stalking off as well, Ukraine deciding to follow after with an armful of snowballs. Ducking under an incoming snowball Natalya grabbed one from Ukraine's supply and threw it back at her attacker, narrowly missing Seychelles who disappeared behind the top of the fort. "How annoying," she grumbled, hopping over a small barricade in front of her own fort.
There she found a few others hiding behind the defenses such as England and France, as they drew a map into the snow and talked about plans to the others there.
England pointed down at an overhead view of the front of the enemy's base. "We need that front main wall of theirs to come down. I can only assume they made it thicker than the others, because the hits we've made in it so far have barely made a dent."
"Zhat is most likely my brozher's doing," Prussia butt in, ducking down as a snowball exploded against the top of the barrier. "I sink I overheard zhem saying to also pour vater on and in between zhe bricks. Natural concrete!"
"That's... bloody genius!" England stated in shock. "Damn right! German ingenuity at its finest baby!" Prussia said with a smile, weirdly complimenting their opponents.
"Oh shut it you sun bleached Nazi," Natalya spat as she looked over the small wall, tossing a snowball over and successfully hitting Lithuania on top of his head. She smiled proudly at that. "Big brother already has a plan for the wall. We just have to keep those idiots distracted while he prepares it."
"Zhat's good news. Is 'e going to sneak in and punch it down or somesing?" France wondered, Prussia gawking in anger. "Are ve just going to ignore vhat zhe hell she just said to me?!"
They did.
"I don't know what he's doing, but I know that wall is going down," she responded with conviction. Taking another snowball from her sister and whipping it across the field.
"Good. Latvia, go let the frontline know," England ordered. Latvia nodded and exited the barricade, his short stature allowing him to remain at nearly full height and run in the trench.
"Hello? Who is in charge of trench division?" Latvia asked as he walked by the others in the trench. "Huh? Oh, that would be Turkey, with him being the oldest and whatnot," Philippines answered, using his phone camera to peek over the trench. "He's on the other end of the trench."
Latvia thanked him and ran off, just before Philippines got a snowball to the phone, letting out a panicked cry as he wiped it off and checked for any damage.
Once the message was received by Turkey, all the nations in the trench suddenly ducked down, disappearing from sight and shocking the other team.
"Uh, Germany, zhey're doing somesing weird," Belgium cautioned, catching their commander's attention. Germany scanned the battlefield nervously, then looked up at the top of the fort. "Seychelles, Japan, vhat's it looking like up zhere?"
"I can't tell. I sink zhey're 'iding. I can see England's 'ead poking out above if you want me to 'it 'im," Seychelles offered. Japan nodded in agreement. "They're up to something. Be cautious."
Germany hummed and faced his other teammates. They nodded back at him, prepared for whatever it was they had planned. It didn't take long for the other team to pop up from the trench, grouped up on the left and right sides as they let out an endless assault of snowballs.
Germany's team had no choice but to stay behind their defenses, waiting until the onslaught was over.
"Germany? We've got a problem!!!" Australia screamed. Germany peaked out from behind the fort in worry, his eyes widening in terror as he spotted Russia standing in the middle behind the trenches, cocking back a massive snowball above his head with a sinister smile on his face.
"America!?" Germany called out in concern. "On it!" Alfred yelled while hopping out of the trench, sprinting to the front of the fort and getting on guard just as Russia hurled the giant snowball with all his might.
As it flew through the air Alfred braced to catch it, or at least block the giant ball in its tracks. To his dismay it collided with him with so much force both he and the ball were sent flying back and crashing through the wall, part of it fully collapsing and sending everyone on and behind the wall plummeting to the ground and getting buried in a large snow mound.
"Owwww," Alfred groaned as he sat up out of the snow and rubbed his head. "I mean, at least I saved half the wall." Slowly everyone that had fallen down began gathering themselves. "Ah! There's snow in my shirt!!!" A muffled voice came out from the snow pile. Noticing a small leg protruding up out of the snow, Alfred grabbed onto it and lifted it up, freeing Sealand as they frantically shook the snow from their shirt.
Now with the wall down England's team began targeting the opening, peppering Alfred and his teammates with shots and forcing them to flee. "AHH!!! More snow got in my shirt!!!" Sealand screamed from somewhere behind the broken wall.
"Scheiße!" Germany exclaimed gruffly. He wasn't about to let his team be defeated so easily. "Scotland, Cuba, Nezherlands, Australia! Start providing artillery cover, do not give zhem zhe chance to do zhat again or you'll be zhe ones buried headfirst in zhe snow!"
"On it mate! No need to be so snappy," Australia responded as he and his trench group rolled snowballs the size of basketballs and started throwing them high in the air, raining back down on the enemy, and most importantly the enemies hiding behind the walls.
"Ha! Mine landed on Britain, the dumb cunt!" Australia cheered, only to be tapped on the shoulder by Netherlands. "That would be mine. Yours fell a little to the right." He pointed Australia to where the snowball fell, Australia reeling in horror as he noticed Russia with snow all over his head, an eerily happy smile carved into his face.
"Well that's just great isn't it?" Australia sighed while retrieving another snowball. Netherlands grabbed one as well and promptly threw it before returning his attention to Australia. "I could keep him off your back, as long as you're willing to pay. As you know, m— "money makes the world go round, yeah we all know," Australia responded with a roll of his eyes. "I think I'd prefer to face the Russian than be in more debt to you, thanks." Netherlands just shrugged and focused back on his work.
Meanwhile Germany marched past the destroyed section of the fort, dodging snowballs along the way as he passed into the part of the wall still left, Alfred and the nations of the fort division hiding behind it. Reaching down he grabbed Alfred by the arm and harshly yanked him upright. "You. Go out back and do zhe same sing Russia did, now."
Despite how aggressive Germany was, Alfred could be help but give a smug grin. "Vhat? Vhy are you looking at me like zhat?" Germany asked, suddenly feeling very self-conscious. Alfred shrugged. "I don't know. Just funny that the one that didn't want a part of this originally is now so competitive."
Germany narrowed his eyes and glared at the American, even as he was a little embarrassed. "If I'm going to be dragged into zhis madness zhen I refuse to lose, understand? Now go do your job!"
"Sheesh! Alright. Don't get your schnitzel in a twist dude." Alfred responded while removing himself from Germany's hold. "Wait, I'll go too!" Another voice calling out, both nations turning to see Spain approach, stepping over Japan and Seychelles as they and Monaco worked on rebuilding the wall.
"I think I've got a plan," Spain continued, piquing Alfred's interest. "I like plans, let's go!" Alfred shouted while practically dragging Spain away. Germany rubbed his forehead and marched off again. Hopefully this plan wouldn't end up dooming them, given it was Spain and not Alfred coming up with it.
"Uhh, R-R-Russia, how is this helping us to the victory?" Latvia asked, terror in his voice as the larger man pulled him along away from the safety of the trench, as well as Estonia in their other hand, who hung their head low with an exhausted expression.
"Well little Latvia, in the battle sometimes sacrifice has to be made in order to be the victorious, you understand da?" Russia spoke all two happily, Latvia looking up at them in fear. "N-Not us, right..? R-R-Right??"
"You do great, none of the worries," Russia responded cryptically, letting go of the two Baltics then immediately taking Estonia by the shoulders, pushing him to stand and walk in front of him. It didn't take long before the man was getting hit repeatedly, not a flake landing on Russia himself.
"Estonia!" Latvia cried out while trying to reach out to his friend, only to be picked up and held in the air. "I said no worries, it is only the snow, and I do not believe their team's snowballs contain the rocks. . . Hopefully. Now protect my face," Russia ordered, giving no room for argument.
All Latvia could do was whine as him and his friend were assaulted by snowballs while they were led ever closer toward the other team. Luckily for the two of them they didn't have to walk too far before Russia called for Estonia to stop, off to the side between both sides.
With a few strong kicks he created a deep enough hole for him to hide in, though shooed the other two from trying to hide in it as well. "Now go retrieve my sestras and be bringing them here." Latvia and Estonia exchanged nervous glances and looked back at the war zone they had just suffered through, Latvia beginning to cry.
With the two reluctantly leaving, Russia scouted out the enemy's base, noticing a suspicious looking Alfred behind the base knelt down and building something. He couldn't see what it was but it was reasonable to conclude that they were doing the same thing he did previously.
Not that he cared, his team should expect retaliation for what they did, plus there were nineteen of them, they could handle it themselves. Ducking as a few snowballs flew over he started making his own in preparation for when his sisters arrive. When they get an opening he'll lead them into and tear down that silly little fort.
Where the hell is that vodka bastard!" Romano shouted, covering his head and curling into a tight ball as everything around him was devastated. "Um, yeah shouldn't he be making more of those big snowball thingys?" Taiwan wondered, popping her head above the trench to search before having to dive back down as more artillery rained down.
"I think I see him!" She exclaimed, pointing some nearby nations toward where the man sat relatively peacefully as opposed to them. "The hell is he doing there?!" England shouted, trying and failing to not get hit from his barricade. "We need him here defending for when America comes back."
From behind him New Zealand crawled around until they were side by side. "If he's already over there then have him take out their artillery. I'm sure we can defend ourselves."
England frowned but nodded and looked around at his team for a messenger, spotting Latvia and Estonia beginning to escort the two sisters across the battlefield. "Hey, you four, when you're across tell Russia to go after Scotland and them!"
Though by the time they had reached Russia it was too late, as Alfred began marching out with a massive snowball of his own that dwarfed himself, a massive toothy grin plastered on his face. "Let's see you guys try and stop this!" He shouted, goading the other team.
England's team scrambled to defend themselves and their base, but no one wanted to be the one to put themselves in the path of a giant snowball going god knows how fast.
"Poland, why don't you go help out?" Turkey asked while smiling a little too happily. As Poland tried to explain how he understandably didn't want to do that, Turkey simply lifted him up by his coat collar and tossed him out of the trench into the line of fire.
At the same time all the nations outside of the trench ran toward Switzerland for protection, who for the entire fight so far has been relaxing and eating snacks while snowballs mysteriously continue to miss him.
Alfred pulled his arms back, holding it for a moment to pinpoint where he wanted to aim. At the same time Russia had finally noticed, quickly rolling a new snowball and hurling it at the American as the giant snowball was launched, clocking Alfred in the jaw and sending them collapsing onto their side.
Unfortunately it was the tiniest bit too slow, the large ball now hurdling toward the fort's wall.
Poland got on his feet and stared at Turkey, not registering them crouching down behind the trench. "Are you like, brain dead or something? I'm not gonna stand here and get kil—"
Faster than the eye can see Poland had completely vanished, now about twenty feet back where there was a sudden and incredibly loud crashing sound. Everyone turned toward the noise in worry, seeing their front wall in the midst of crumbling.
From somewhere in the pile of snow a pained whimper could be heard from Poland. "I think my everything is broken."
Both teams waited with held breath as the plume of snow slowly began to dissipate, wondering how much damage had been done, though as the air finally cleared up. . . "A second wall!?" Germany shouted. To his and his team's horror there was a second wall right behind the first, and almost entirely intact.
"HAHAHA! Told Sweden not to sell himself short," Denmark laughed while slapping England on the back, the shorter nation hissing in pain.
England's team let out a collective sigh of relief, knowing they had bought themselves a few more minutes while Alfred has to leave to create another big ball.
With their wall still standing and the discovery of the second wall momentarily distracting the other team, as well as Russia off to the side, both sides were now on fairly equal terms. Though they couldn't go blow for blow for long as after some minutes someone on England's team let out a yell.
Turning around once more they caught sight of the second wall falling down, those inside the fort escaping the crumbling building. "What zhe 'ell 'appened?" France wondered out loud, speeding toward the wall.
"It's Spain aru! He's running behind the wall!!" China shouted in alarm, pointing to the man trying to bolt away from their destruction. England stared upon the scene in bemused wonder, gears quickly starting to turn in his head. 'Spain?! How the— no way. . . Was he in the snowball America threw?!?'
"Somebody get that bastard!" England ordered once out of his thoughts, multiple members of the team, especially an angry Sweden, focusing on Spain as they sprinted across no man's land.
"Sestra you are just having to take a snowball and throw it," Russia repeated, having tried to encourage Ukraine numerous times to do anything other than carry snowballs for others.
Ukraine tilted her head and observed the soft white sphere as she rolled it in her gloved hands. "I don't know. I haven't done the snowball fight in so very long. What if I do it wrong and am hurting someone?" Russia sighed inwardly but gave a polite smile. "It is only the snow, they will be fine."
Hearing the echo of England's voice the siblings turned to see what was wrong, noticing Spain running across the field and dodging snowballs.
With a feral shriek Natalya grabbed the snowball from Ukraine's hand and vaulted the foxhole, throwing with all her might at Spain. The snowball blasted the man in the back of his head, his body going entirely limp within an instant and sliding forward into the snow.
Ukraine covered her mouth with a gasp as Spain went down, while Russia beat down a grin that had crept onto his face. "Unless it is our sestra throwing snowball, I suppose."
Just as fast as Spain went down, another snowball flew the opposite way and hit Natalya in the shoulder, the girl glaring at the direction it came from. Alfred stared back at her with a wide smirk, waving in a discreet yet teasing manner before slinking away behind a snow wall.
Lost in the frenzy of the fight Natalya immediately began running after him, shocking Russia who had been preoccupied with Ukraine. "Sestra wait not yet! Ugh, dammit!"
Running up to the wall she turned the corner with her arm raised, ready to throw, only for no one to be there. Looking all around she was just able to spot him move behind another wall further away, running after him again only to come to the same result.
He lead her deeper into the fort, ducking behind half destroyed walls and crumbled snow piles while running backwards to keep an eye on her, the smile never leaving his face.
Chasing him even farther she came into a small clearing, losing him behind the numerous defenses that circled the area.
"Come out and fight me seriously you coward!" She yelled, her eyes darting around as she tried to find him again. Alfred only chuckled at her seriousness, leaving her aggravated as she turned where she believed he was.
Throwing a snowball with immense force it hit a defensive wall and put a large hole in it, Alfred nowhere to be seen. "This won't be like our first fight Natalya..." he whispered, a warm breath on the back of her neck.
Diving into a roll she spun and threw another snowball, but again there was no one. With a grumble she grabbed a handful of snow for another snowball. "Trying to use my own trick against me huh? Have some originality you prick!"
Standing straight up she waited for him to speak, which didn't take long. "Jeez, someone's a little intense," he taunted, again from behind. This time she quickly swiped with her hand as she turned, only meeting air. "Weren't you saying this would be a bad idea? This is pretty fun."
Spinning around again she tried the same swipe, but rather than hitting behind her she did a 360, a startled Alfred now directly in front of her. "I've got you!" She yelled, her hand with the snowball swinging down in a speedy blur.
Unfortunately for her at the very last second he caught her wrist and pushed her arm back up, while pulling the rest of her in and giving her a fast but passionate kiss. In shock she dropped the snowball in her hand and remained completely still until he moved away, where he slipped into hiding once more, grinning even larger.
Blinking a few times she snapped her head from side to side to make sure no one had seen, then silently continued her pursuit.
With Natalya going ahead Russia had no choice but to move in as well, starting by casually pushing a whole wall over and shoving whoever he passed into the snow. With Alfred strangely missing it was basically a cakewalk invading the base.
Eventually he had made it to his true destination, knocking his arm through another defense before hopping into a tench, his heavy boots slamming into the ground behind Australia.
Slowly Australia turned his head, dread filling him as he glanced over at Netherlands. "Well hit him mate, he's just standin' there ya cunt!"
Netherlands scanned the two of them for a moment before shrugging and looking away, pulling out and lighting a cigarette. "Should've paid me." Even as Russia grabbed the man by the waist and flipped him over he continued staring at the other man. "I won't forget this betrayal mate. Your own teammate?! I see how it is."
He crossed his arms and turned away from Netherlands with a frown, meanwhile Russia threw him down and buried him waist up in the snow.
After what took far too much effort Alfred was able to slip away from Natalya, taking a moment to take a knee behind a barricade and catch his breath. His breathing was heavy and labored, a rattle resonating in his chest at every exhale. It felt tight and he was already getting a cramp in his side.
With a few coughs he smiled and clutched at his left lung. Was he really this tired already? He knows Natalya is a pain to outrun but it had only been a few minutes. He's America for god's sake!
"You alright? I knew you should've worn more layers. You're getting a cold already," Canada said from beside Alfred, with all the concern of a sibling that's had to deal with their sick family member far too many times. "Nah... nah I'm good. Just need t— to catch my breath... for a sec."
"If you're sure," Canada replied, not very convinced. Alfred sat for a minute or two and tried to get himself to breathe deeply, until something finally clicked in his brain. "Wait, Mattie..?"
For about ten or so seconds the two brothers sat, a tense silence growing. Then in a flash Alfred scooped up some snow to throw, only for the sneaky brother to pelt him in the face with a snowball of his own and run away into the battlefield.