Rory Elsher 16, District 2 Male
Pre-Private Session
"You are already blacklisted but just don't try to make things worse they could kill you at the beginning just realise that, then no going on your little kill spree," Everett says
"They won't," I mumble
He has been helpful which does surprise me, maybe a little too helpful and almost controlling but he knows when I'm about to flip it so he leaves, I wanted to burn him alive yesterday but that's just me some days I wake up and I want to burn someone alive, it's really nothing personal to said person. I just feel like it, I guess and that's a perfectly okay excuse.
That's what Lucifer said that it's okay to kill without reason, Harley doesn't so why should I, it's not like I am getting tormented by the people I burn. I just need to sacrifice enough souls so I can please my father, not my actual father but the father who has adopted me, fuck my actual father.
I might be crazy but I'm not a satanic believer. I don't believe the devil is walking this world but the afterworld is an entirely different story even as a child I used to hear voices, but I knew they were real it was like I was special. I can hear My grandmother's voice sometimes like she is guiding me and talking to me, it's peaceful I hope when I die I get buried next to her.
Sadly the sins I have committed won't send me to heaven but I just want to see her one last time, she is really the only person in this world I love, even more than Harley I don't love him, I physically can't but the care I have for him is stronger it scares me what could happen. I know we plan to die, and we have to plan our end game but I'm not ready for the consequences, for the emotions I may feel if it doesn't go our way, if we don't complete our end game.
We don't even know it yet, we haven't spoken about it because we don't know the actual answer to said question, it's probably not the best plan, and it is probably not a good idea, going in blind but when have we or even I have planned I always go in blind, when I set a target I don't plan who it is. I just walk down the street and the first person that the banshee screams for is my target, even then I don't plan when or how I grab them. I just wait for the perfect moment and it becomes mine, how I kill depends on my mood, some days I feel like multiple kills, sometimes it's one, and it changes all the time unless it's Wednesday.
Today is Wednesday.
My burn day.
It's the day I burn someone alive, and that's a sin that needs to be committed but ever since I got my matches Everett hasn't left me alone, apparently, Harley cut someone apart with a butter knife (what a king) and threw them out the window last night. I heard peacekeepers knocking yesterday but they won't kill us, they need our entertainment, the special unit only started becoming a thing ever since District Two had all those victors locked up, there must be something in the water originally it was just a place for all of us to feel safe, to have a home so we don't cause carnage on the streets.
It wasn't until recently that we were forced to train but what I learned is I feel comfortable with my people, people like Harley, Maverick, and Rowan they understand why I kill, and they don't question me Everett isn't like that, he still talks down to me like I'm this little kid.
"How do you know that" he says
"They get rid of us and who do they really have, Stellan won't last not even Satan wants him, Kylian isn't a truly born killer, he is more of a proxy, a puppet master. Declan and Levin the two anti-heroes, maybe if one loses his mind but they both have a reason to hesitate to become full killers. They want us even if they won't get much, bloodshed jokes on them. We may want the blood but we also want to tarnish the souls and spirits of others. We are seen as the mental nutcases, not the villain" I say
"You are smarter than you look, you know that, especially with some of the choices you make" he admits
"I made those choices voluntarily, like the reapings" I say
"What about The day you had to go to the hospital for three-degree burns and you are lucky you were given the medication otherwise you would still have said burns," he says
"That was an irrational decision but I had no fear of losing my life that medicine doesn't get handed around often. I knew they were always looking at me, they want a maniac and District 2 tends to send out the best ones, well besides your games, although you and Aelia didn't disappoint and I wouldn't call Campbell good either, he wasn't, he was driven by love and that's the last thing a smart person should get driven by is love it is a negative and disgusting emotion" I admit
"Do they have you guys practise poetry in the special unit" he mumbles I just smirk at him tilting my head "Just be careful okay?" he says
"You said they have a kill station, I will show them I'm willing to kill, I know I'm blacklisted and I don't really care I like being blacklisted," I say
"So the thought of dying doesn't scare you one bit," he says
"I'm sick of being fearful, sick of feeling powerless" I shrug
"You feel powerless, god kid" he says
"You don't get it, do you?, you don't see him, no one does," I say.
I just see Lucifer in the corner again as he waves at me, mocking me, he wants a massacre today, he isn't getting one, I want to burn all of them I want to burn this entire city to the ground and use acidic fire that exists it turns the body to ash in second, it is very very hard to get and I only got my hands on it once clearly a witch makes it that's what witches use to use.
Everett just rubs my shoulder "We can talk more after the sessions, please just be careful," he says
"You care about me, don't you" I smirk
"I care about the district's reputation and if you do murder the president, we will become the new 12" he says.
I just shrug I couldn't care less what he thinks, again, he is lucky I haven't killed him but unlike Harley, I normally kill people I do not, like, he is close to being on the list but not close yet.
"I'm not stupid," I say, I'm sick of having to repeat that yes I got myself locked up and yes I never covered my crimes, so every fire was pretty much pointed at me since apparently I was the only pyromaniac in the district but it still doesn't mean I'm stupid maybe I liked knowing the crimes were tied to me. I wanted the credit I liked walking the street and seeing people shudder because they were worried I would make them the next victim and I always had my eyes open, someone stood out and they became ash in the coffin. I just follow Everett out.
"Do I even show my skills?" I ask. I haven't practised with weaponry at all, I can use a sword that's pretty much the boy from 2 101 if you have a weapon that can't really be used for fighting purposes like a blowtorch but I didn't want a target on my back. I want to seem like I would be an easy kill, yes, we are feared but that doesn't make us unkillable being strong and feared, are two entirely different things.
We don't have much fighting experience, insanity can only fuel us for so long and yes we have a tight bond but there are siblings this year and the boys from one seem tight but I guess we are the only pair willing to die for each other, that makes us easier kills.
"You have skills other than waving a match or blow torch" Everett snickers I just sneer at him.
"You are both blacklisted so it doesn't matter, but if you put on a weak weaponry persona, it may ask questions because at the end of the day a blow torch isn't a fighting weapon and I would not recommend fighting with it, it could burn you too," he says
"I like being burned but you are right" I say. I already know what my role would be and I already know my score, it doesn't mean I can't we'll just unleash the anger, I can't rebel still doesn't mean I can't make them wet their pants in fear of me I will destroy them in the afterworld that's for sure because I know I won't be getting peace I don't deserve it either, I blame my neglected parents however that isn't a excuse apparently according to the peacekeepers and my psychiatrists.
"Just hold onto this just in case alright, the last thing you want are burns in the games. could get infected you never know when they would change things up and make it more about survival than gifting medicine, normally there are stations that hint to the arena, anything that stood out" Everett says stopping me before we make it in the lounge and handing me a vile of medicine, he doesn't tend to like mentoring us together, Harley and I have barely been together her, it makes me paranoid that Maverick might be trying to brainwash him but I know Harley wouldn't do that.
"It has a fire station," I say
"Anything else," Everett says
"It had a church," I say
Everett sighs "Great now you see churches, just don't kill your self alright bloody Christ," Everett says walking off as Harley just chuckles and we take the elevator down as I finger the lighter in my pocket, I also got this from the avox but I hid it in case my matches were stolen I didn't even know lighters were a thing, we didn't have them in the district but this is the capitol.
They have everything.
We walk into the centre and then follow the signs to the training room Harley once again gawking at the girl from 9 when she walks past I should be jealous, that he seems obsessed with this girl but I had a girlfriend until I murdered her, that's what girlfriends are for not that this girl even looks at him, we need them dead anyways. The nines they are evil, they helped kill Koby and they need to suffer.
"Day 8, Day 8," Lucifer says he can see the future but his not giving me the answers fuck head.
"Hey watch your language boy" Lucifer growls, we go into the waiting room everyone sitting down. I sit down next to the younger boy from one who looks like he is about to collapse and I just smirk at him as him and his partner are quick to swap seats
"Don't scare him, I know your secret" Levin whispers in my ear
"Tell everyone I'm not scared," I say, he just shrugs see he doesn't to want drama, he is just protecting his weaker partner and it is sort of sweet. I normally killed weaker targets, not protectors. I admire them for some reason mainly because Rosie was my protector until she died and Lucifer took me over.
"No I am your protector" Lucifer says
"No you are not" I whisper. Levin just glances at me as Harley just stares at the wall in front of him, Levin's district partner gets called in as he almost trips over again, I would put twenty coins on that kid falling off his pedestal and going kaboom I hope that happens that would be funny.
I never liked death by explosions though they destroy the body too much making them all charred, I like what burns especially when the bodies become ash the best thing about setting large files is everything gets so badly burned the families can't even find the remains I find the poetic injustice in that quiet satisfying it puts a large smile on my face that's for sure.
You can cut the tension with a knife there has been a lot of well-unspoken conflict, a quarter of the tributes here are born killers and the happy spirited ones are too scared to be noticed. I look around the room and I imagine killing everyone besides Harley, some I could see burning alive, some I could see slitting the inside of their throat, Stellan I want to feed directly to the devil and that's a painful and slow death as I barely even realised levin gets called as he seems relieved to get away from us, his like his not one of my normal targets, even if I tend to father females they tend to be young females no one here besides little ol Mabel fits that target so looks like I'm a free agent when it comes to heartless murder.
I just finger the light in my pocket wanting to feel the flames burn but only a few mores hours then the whole world will light up.
Declan Callen 18, District 2 Male
Score Reveals
I enjoyed that more than I should have and that's the scary thing. I always have felt powerless in my life even being an outlaw, you still never felt in control, it was like the entire world was against me, and it's why I am a hostile person. I am I got sick of it, I got sick of trying to make things right so I stopped caring.
It makes things easier that way, but that moment when I was attacking that trainer it felt right, it felt good. Xander is right I'm on the brink of insanity and if it wasn't for my sister who knows where I will end up, she is keeping me afloat for now anyway but I never have been good with my anger and I tend to take it out on others, to deflect attention from my self, it's cruel and unfair but it's the only way I can react and lately Aurelia has been the victim of that anger.
"Are you going to tell me what happened, I know happened but I want to hear it from your mouth?" Xander says.
Neither Aurelia nor I have said anything about what happened but I do know what happened with her, I waited for her sessions to finish, trying this supportive older brother thing. Didn't really work since she didn't want to talk about the fact she pretty much let herself almost get murdered and she didn't even kill him just pushed him off and ran like a coward.
And I don't respect cowards, I don't want to risk my life for cowards.
"Nothing happened, I just don't feel like talking to you right now" I say
Brayen rolls his eyes whispering something to Aurelia, the obvious favouritism annoys me too but she does need more support, she isn't a coward I didn't really mean that but it doesn't make her strong either, she just takes what is handed to her like she is too scared to fight back, but this isn't her life in nine not fighting back will end up getting her killed and if she dies there goes my anchor.
I need her more than she realises maybe more than she needs me and that's what upsets me the most because I'm the older brother I'm meant to be the protector.
"Classy, real classy you don't have to be ashamed I know you have a killer raging inside just as long as you don't get addicted" Xander says
"I'm fine at least I'm actually willing to fight for myself and not freeze up like a coward," I say Aurelia just glances at me and I can see some sort of blank look in her eye like she almost expected me to put the attention back on her.
"Again real, real classy, I wouldn't blame her if she killed you, you fucking deserve it" Xander growls
"You deserved it too but you're still sitting here, even though pretty much the whole of panem wishes you would slice your wrists for good," I say Brayen jumps from his spot grabbing Xander before he can attack me whispering something to him.
"I may be broken but I'm not afraid to admit it fuck let's just wait for scores," Xander says I just nod, I want to tell Aurelia I didn't mean what I said but I have said so many hurtful things there really is no point like I can't help it that the second I start to feel vulnerable, I panic and my self-protective nature comes back and I need to defend myself.
I am scared of vulnerability and I'm not afraid to admit that, it would have been easier if I was alone if I didn't have the sister. I always wanted back her back with me, because being with her I just want to protect her and let her take the victory but at the same time I'm scared, I'm afraid.
I don't want to die.
You see what people experience on their deathbeds. I have lost boys close to me normally by illness or starvation and I am scared of that, I know the Hunger Games will mean getting murdered but even then I'm afraid of what my fate will be I'm not a good guy. I never was even as a kid I always saw the dark clouds instead of the sunny sky yet I was able to mask my emotions.
"I didn't mean what I said I'm sorry" I say to Aurelia
"Maybe we won't tell each other everything," she says bluntly. I can't blame her for not wanting to tell me about her life I have been prying maybe a little too much and she is quick to shut me down I do want to know. I do care I just have a really bad way of showing it but I'm not ready to become vulnerable yet I don't know if I ever will be.
"I'm sorry," I say
"You know sorry means nothing you do know that, look I know for some weird reason you blame her for your tragic childhood but it isn't her fault, and it isn't your fault either not everyone needs to be blamed" Xander says for once his right well he is always right.
"Why do you blame me for what happened" she asks softly
"Because once you were gone something inside me died," I say she opens her mouth to say something but instead the host comes on.
I see the look of disgust on both mentors' faces, I'm not going to question what the fuck that is, fuck I don't even like this whole score novelty in the first place, would that really help get us sponsors. I doubt I would get much I haven't really shown any loveable qualities and my original predicted placing put more of a target on my back and is more of a curse than a blessing.
"As long as neither of you got an 11 which would shock me, well wouldn't really shock me for you, you two should be all good," Xander says directing the last bit at me.
I wouldn't be shocked if Aurelia gets higher than me, they don't just score of what you show, they score you based of everything I may put her down to make myself feel better but at the end of the day, she is stronger than me, she is a better person I should die for her, it would be the right thing, I would if I wasn't so scared.
If I wasn't so selfish.
As an outlaw we were brothers yet at the end of the day it was every man for himself, if we were in a situation where if we stayed we would have gotten hurt, we left, it wasn't worth the risk it's all about power in numbers not like the outsiders they wouldn't leave a wounded solider behind the only reason we killed their leader was because he snuck out alone.
"What about a 12," I say
"Impossible unless you're a robot, which may not be impossible for you either" Xander says I don't say anything just fiddling with my hands, my sister seems a lot calmer them me she is very placid and even if she flinches at little sounds you wouldn't know that her cage is getting rattled.
"District One"
'Cedric Lenlen: Weaponry 7. Strength 7. Survival 5. Intelligence 6 Willingness to kill 6. Mental stability 10. Overall score 7'
Makes me feel better knowing that kid is a career district fuck he is hopeless
"Don't underestimate him, he is still from one they raise killers" Xander says
"That kid couldn't kill a fly," I say
"Arrogance gets you killed," Xander says
"Didn't get you killed," I say
Xander just growls but Brayen just puts a hand on his arm as he just stands up moving away from being next to me and sitting next to my sister. I really do need to stop being this I don't know rude asshole but I just hate feeling like this, I hate being wrong everything they are saying is right but it's like I can't help it.
"Clearly you haven't taken the medication I got you," he says. I just shrug, I threw them in the bin. I was already going through withdrawal before I was reaped, when I tried to purchase it from the black market they said they didn't have any supplies, it's like the district knew I was getting reaped and cut off my supply.
"I can't, I go through tiredness, headaches, mood swings, a few days after not having it because I haven't had it did a while I feel fine" I say
"And why didn't you tell me this" he says
"Because it's obvious you don't care you might as well just mentor my sister too, she needs all the false hope she can get," I say. I just bite my lip again and even if Brayen looks this close to ripping my head off he doesn't, could be the fact my sister is hardly gripping his hand to stop him from attacking, heck even he acts like a better older brother than I do and they aren't even related.
"If I didn't care, you would be dead" He mumbles
'Levin Huxley: Weaponry 10. Strength 10. Survival 11. Intelligence 10. Willingness to kill 10. Mental stability 7. Overall score 10'
"Be a little concerned with that mental stability, he can crack under pressure, especially if his allie dies early," Xander says
We both just nod even if there is a lot of tension in the room right now all because of me and I hate myself for it but when I open my mouth wanting to apologise, it's like I can't I'm too prideful, I don't like admitting I am wrong.
"District 2"
'Rory Elsher: Weaponry 7. Strength 10. Survival 7. Intelligence 8. Willingness to kill 12. Mental stability 0. Overall score 11'
'Harley Tandley: Weaponry 10. Strength 10. Survival 5. Intelligence 9. Willingness to kill 12. Mental stability 0. Overall score 11'
"I thought they would have been equal strength wise but clearly not" Aurelia says
"They are both messed up in the head but Harley is more in tune with reality which makes him smarter and stronger, just please stay away from both of them, they were close Kobe that's why you two are on their hit list, plus Everett that mother fucker hates us," Xander says
Thanks to Xander
"Can they be beaten?" I ask
"Everyone can be beaten, their whole lives involved around two things killing and each other, you clip one and the other will spiral" Xander shrugs, even now Brayen stays quiet it's clear he doesn't want to put any cards for me to see on the table but I guess I should appreciate the fact Xander is actually speaking to me.
District 3 gets a 5 and a 4
"Stellan Moore: Weaponry 11. Strength 11. Survival 5. Intelligence 7. Willingness to kill 12. Mental stability 12. Overall score 10'
He doesn't concern me as much as he could I can see right through him, it's all a facade he wants to be the villain, he wants the attention, have I been like that?
"Be wary of him, although he reminds me of Sawyer, and he didn't last too long" Brayen says
"Kylian Wilson: Weaponry 11. Strength 8. Survival 11. Intelligence 12. Willingness to kill 12. Mental stability 12. Overall score 10'
I just look over to Aurelia who looks as stunned as me "His file painted a picture of some genius but it was very well worded, he just seemed like a harmless boy from four" she mumbles
"Never a judge a book by their cover" Xander says glancing at me. I ruffle my eyebrows, he really has no faith in me, doesn't he, it is obvious they are starting to rethink the idea of us going together. I heard both Brayen and Xander talk to her about it last night, that leaving me will be better for her but she can't, she has faith in me, she sees the good in me and I need to repay her for that
The boys from 5 get a 5 and a 4, and the boys from 6, 5 and a 6, being a outer I know not to underestimate anyone even if I would pretty much call them road kill, the younger boy from 7 gets a 6
"Dash Stewart. Weaponry 7. Strength 9. Survival 7. Intelligence 5. Willingness to kill 6. Mental stability 10. Overall score 7'
He is part of the only trio this year, but I wouldn't call them threats they do have a child with them after all.
I do start to get a little nervous when our scores come up
"Aurelia Callen. Weaponry 5. Strength 4. Survival 12. Intelligence 12. Willingness to kill 3. Mental stability 8. Overall score 7'
She looks a little deflated but Brayen just pats her back "That is still a good score, brains can beat brawn it has happened before" Brayen says
"I wouldn't worry much about the 8 for mental stability, it just means you are a bit dispirited but doesn't make you insane," Xander says Aurelia just nods she is good at masking her emotions even I don't really know what is going through her head.
"Declan Callen. Weaponry 8. Strength 11. Survival 10. Intelligence 5. Willingness to kill 10. Mental stability 5. Overall score 10'
No one really reacts at the start even I'm just blanked face "Good job" Xander mumbles after a minute of silence but I know he doesn't sound convinced, it's concern.
I already came across as a threat but my score paints a bigger one, I don't know how I got a ten maybe it is just that paint a target on my back but the willingness to kill, the mental stability that concerns me.
I knew I wasn't mentally all there, I have a disorder but mix that with the fact I don't care about killing, I could become the next Xander.
"I may say some mean things and I may treat you the way you don't deserve but that shows how much I need you" I say to Aurelia, she just slightly smiles at me as Xander just leans over her patting my shoulder briefly.
The little girl from 10 gets a two I would paint her as a certain bloodbath but she has allied herself smartly
Even if our scores aren't equal, we are the brains and the brawns. I was never the smartest person I would call myself illiterate but she is a genius maybe not as smart as four but that isn't an insult at all.
"Winston Connors. Weaponry 8. Strength 7. Survival 11. Intelligence 4. Willingness to kill 7. Mental stability 10. Overall score 8'
"And there is our dark horse, they tend to win more often than not," Xander says and he is right.
"And now for our roles and revised predicted placings this year three roles will include two tributes each"
Revised Predicted placings
1st: Kylian Wilson
2nd: Harley Tandley
3rd: Levin Huxley
4th: Declan Callen
5th: Stellan Moore
6th: Rory Elsher
7th: Aurelia Callen
8th: Winston Connors
"Is that a good or a bad thing I dropped and a good or bad thing she is in the top 8?" I say
"Good for you, bad for her" Xander says biting his lip
"They don't mean anything, okay, it's just a whole novelty thing" Brayen says
The Hero: Aurelia Callen (97% of votes)
The villain: Kylian Wilson (90% of votes) Stellan Moore (96% of votes)
The insane: Harley Tandley (100% of votes) Rory Elsher (100% of votes)
The Anti Hero: Levin Huxley (99% of votes) Declan Callen (100% of votes)
The Dark Horse: Winston Connors (100% of votes)
The Underdog: Cedric Lenlen (100% of votes)
"How do they get all this stuff about us fuck it's like they know more about me than I do" I say
"It's freaky but you can hide anything from the Capitol" Xander says
And that's the thing that worries me.