Kaiba stepped out onto the terrace, fully dressed in his usual turtleneck and dark slacks with a damp towel hanging around his neck, and both officers flinched when he stepped closer. Offended, he kept his distance and stayed by the door.
"What do you want?" Kaiba made sure to speak English and he winced at how rude he sounded.
The officers looked embarrassed and shared a look before one of them spoke up, "ah…sir. We need to do a house check because of the calls. Our chief requires us to check inside your rooms." And one of them held up a piece of paper that looked like a warrant.
Holy shit, Kaiba's eyelid twitched and wondered which lawyer he needed to call.
"It will be fast," the officers assured him. "We need to walk through and make sure all those calls were not pranks."
"What were the calls about?" Kaiba crossed his arms and leaned on the doorframe, still blocking the entrance.
"We said earlier, sir, about the man we showed you a photo of," the officer holding the pad raised the device and drummed his fingers on it. "Mr. Nils Ranheimr. The calls claim he is being harmed here on this property. We must do our duty and walk through your house to ensure he is not here. Please allow us inside."
What? Kaiba thought sourly and stepped aside to let the officers in. Mistaken address or something. There was no one here aside from himself and Yami.
"Fine, and you'll find me upstairs with my boyfriend," Kaiba scoffed as he walked away and heard the officers shuffling into the living room. He climbed the stairs and entered the master bedroom, making sure to knock on the closed bathroom door to call out, "Yami? Can I come in?"
Yami was just finished spiking his hair when he reached forward and pulled the door open, glancing up to give Kaiba a tentative smile, "...What happened?"
"...The two officers are walking through because of some prank calls," Kaiba explained as he stared at the jar of hair gel in Yami's hands. "Smells good, what brand?"
"Ah… Gatsby…" Yami turned the gel over in his palm to show off the logo. "You don't mind it? I think it smells too much like…a waxy grape."
"No, it smells good," Kaiba leaned forward to snake his arm around Yami's hip and pressed his lips against the shell of Yami's ear, inhaling the fresh scent and instantly relaxing.
Yami kept staring at his own reflection, hearing the officers entering the bedroom, so he turned his face to the side to meet Kaiba's lips and began furiously making out with him, making sure to cap the hair gel behind Kaiba's neck as he met his hands together to screw the lid on, while keeping an ear on the officers talking, using Kaiba's face to conceal his own face.
They backed up further into the bathroom, and Yami felt his ass bump the edge of the tub, so he sat down on the bevel and wrapped his legs around the backs of Kaiba's thighs, sliding his hand up and down Kaiba's thighs, intentionally skipping the area of his erection.
Kaiba was thrown as Yami kept touching him everywhere but his dick, so that spurred him on to give deeper, more enthusiastic kisses, hoping to earn a dick grope through his pants.
The officers peeked into the bathroom and quickly ducked out.
It was obvious by the sounds coming from the bathroom that sex was happening, but they had to look in anyway, as per their instructions to check every room, and both officers hurried back down the stairs, neither of them checking the walk-in closet.
They headed down the basement where they found laundry was running, and everything was neat and clean. No signs of struggle other than the semen-stained sex carnage in the main living room, where both officers gave the couch wide berth when stepping around it, staying quiet.
"Mr. Karlson's son is…lively," the officer said to his co-worker, and the other man grimaced.
Yes, lively.
That was the word.
Horny was more like it.
They stood in the middle of the kitchen galley, noting the two fish on the plate of ice and a clean prep-surface.
Well… looked like a romantic…honeymoon den.
"We're possibly intruding on their time together. They might be hated," the other officer said with a knowing nod. "You know, how people call the police on people they hate? Well, those two men… What do you think?"
"Hating the gays? Yeah, I heard it," his coworker replied, taking off his cap to nervously run a hand through his hair. "We don't get hate crimes that often now, do we?"
"This man hates the gays," The officer held the pad up to show the picture of the bearded subject again. "He was logged into our system for calling another house in the similar way. Claiming they're hurting children in the house, and we arrived to find a single gay man living there. Remember that? It was…"
"Ah! Years ago! The-The…something-game-hate raid!" He nodded vigorously, putting his cap back on. "A video game was involved, yeah?"
"Yeah, it was talk of the town for months," the officer nodded and turned the pad off, staring at the semen stain on the couch with a sigh. "Okay, let's tell them we're leaving and that we're sorry."
Both officers nodded and slowly walked up the steps, pausing when they saw a spiky-haired man coming down the stairs, with his boner up in his pants.
They turned away frantically and shuffled to the door, talking loudly, "Okay we did our walk-through. No issue here! Sorry to intrude! We are leaving now!"
Yami paused on the lowest step and felt Kaiba bump into him from the back, giving him a playful nudge on the ass cheek with his hardness, followed by a whisper in his ear, "why did you stop? You were getting the lube?"
"One moment! Officers! I have fish for you!" Yami called in English, and he turned to give Kaiba's dick a hard squeeze through his pants, jutting up on his tiptoes to give Kaiba a playful, biting kiss as he whispered, "get the lube and wait for me on the bed. I'm giving the officers the bad fish."
"What bad fish?" Kaiba wondered with a frown. "They're all freshly caught."
"I used expired bait," Yami explained quietly with an eyeroll. "We're not eating that. I caught two fish with better bait, so go up and wait, okay–?"
"Wait wait, does it matter?" Kaiba hissed, his head spinning with arousal when Yami gave him another grope through the pants. "You cleaned the fish–"
"I'm not feeding us fish with bait that stinks," Yami replied darkly, tightening his grip over Kaiba's erection before deciding to unzip his front so he could reach in and give the head a few rubs with his thumb. "Upstairs. Now."
And he let go quickly, seeing Kaiba double over at the sudden loss of pressure and let out a huff, cursing under his breath.
Smirking, Yami ran to the freezer to extract the two large plastic bags of filet fish pieces, and from the corner of his eye, saw Kaiba limping up the stairs. Cute.
Then he walked the frozen fish to the door where he saw the two officers lingering. Making sure they weren't wearing button cams, Yami boldly approached and held them out with both hands, speaking Japanese, "for you. They'll taste good…like the man you're looking for."
The men accepted the frozen bags with a polite nod, and Yami straightened up to wave, speaking English again with a vague accent, "thank you! Goodbye!" He knew the men were uncomfortable with his erection, so he took firm steps forward to herd them outside, watching them hurry down the steps and climb into their vehicle.
Yami hovered by the door, closing it after he saw them drive away, and he let out a satisfied sigh. Deserved.
He hurried back up the stairs to join Kaiba in bed, trying not to feel too giddy or triumphant, but it was hard. He loved winning this much all in one week. And being rewarded with sex for a neat disposal after an impromptu kill was somehow better than receiving a check.
All the money in the world couldn't buy him the feeling of Kaiba's dick inside.
That he knew for sure.
Kaiba woke up slowly, groggy, sore all over, and extremely content.
He no longer had a sense of day and night.
Yami was being sweet and spoiling him with 'service' by bringing him coffee, and even his toothbrush, so all he had to do was stay in bed and stay hard.
If this was heaven, he wanted to die like this.
Yami made it super obvious that all he wanted was 'relaxation' and dick.
The freshly caught fish was sliced in half, and they ate one side for a lunch where Yami grilled it with fresh vegetables that magically replenished in the fridge. The other slices were put into an interesting fish stew for dinner, which they ate with steamed rice that Yami managed to find a small bag of, somewhere in the pantry. Miraculous.
They were out of wine, but Yami convinced him to have sex sober, so he could remember more of it and feel more, so Kaiba agreed.
Sitting up slowly, Kaiba noticed that Yami was gone, and he had to wonder what food was coming, because his stomach grumbled. Sure enough, Yami's footsteps could be heard padding up the stairs, and he carried two glasses filled with cider and a beautiful platter of cheese, fruit, spiced meat, and crackers. Wow.
"Fuck, I could eat," Kaiba let the covers fall of his chest as he sat up further and let Yami set the luxurious tray onto the bed between them and pick up a grape off the stem, chewing it delicately.
"Yes, eat less of the spiced meat, seeing as how we're flying today," Yami said with a smile, and Kaiba's heart dropped into his stomach.
Oh. The sex bubble was…over?
They were flying out today…?
"My phone's been dead," Kaiba said nervously as he glanced at his nightstand, shocked to see that Yami had plugged it in for him, and 42 notifications were waiting for him. DAMMITTTTTTTT.
"I charged it for you," Yami reached forward to give Kaiba's forearm a loving squeeze. "I know. Work sucks–" And his phone rang from inside the closet in three, specific trills.
Yami perked up and froze. What…?!
That ringtone was for a satellite number only.
DAMMIT. Did he have work too?!
"Fuck. Shouldn't have said the word 'work'," Yami glowered as he got off the bed and walked into the closet to answer the phone.
He snatched his phone up from his bag and stared at the number for a brief second before he answered it, making sure he wasn't connected to any wifi network.
"What. I'm on vacation," Yami said sourly, wondering who the hell had the audacity to directly call his private number. "You better be dead or dying if you're calling me right now."
He didn't give this number out often, so whoever it was might really need him…
Kaiba let out a huff of laughter when he heard this from the bed as he swiped through his emails, not really reading anything. Yami could go from sweet-loving to hostile-asshole in a millisecond. Respect.
Yami frowned as he waited for a pained gurgle on the other end, but what greeted him was a familiar voice that sounded strained, "...I'm…not dead…yet… Atem. But just thought I'd let you know that I'm in hospital right now."
Hospital? Who is this? Yami let out an irritated sigh and said, "I don't know who this is. Won't tell me your name, fool? And your Japanese isn't too bad. Are you in Japan? Wait. Why should I care?"
Outside on the bed, Kaiba let out another huff of laughter.
Man, how he wished he could answer the phone like that.
"It's me, Paradius. The defense lawyer!" The man on the other side hissed in English. "And yes, I can speak Japanese! It's one of the countries I'm in for business the most! ….But right now, I'm hospitalized in Perth. I thought Valon wanted to turn over a new leaf, but instead he poisoned me at the table and left me there to die. I'm lucky they got to me in time. I'm on a stomach pump, thanks to that motherfucker."
Ahh… Yami paced in a narrow circle in the closet and stared at the gun he left on the dressing table counter, his vision blurring slightly. Shit. So Valon wouldn't leave the boss lawyer alone.
"Again, how is this my problem?" Yami let out a small laugh, and Dartz hissed at him on the other end.
"I need you…to help me…talk some sense into Valon," Dartz said, sounding hollow on the other end while beeping from a nearby hospital bed almost drowned out his voice. "His vendetta against me is irritating. I've been nothing but a good boss to him. He lives in this country as a citizen. How soon can you get here?"
Yami blinked rapidly and held his hand up to gather his thoughts.
Hold on. Dartz wanted him to …kill Valon? Sure.
But he was technically retired right now and trying to babysit Kaiba's life.
He couldn't leave Kaiba's side right this instant. And he didn't want to.
"How safe is that hospital?" Yami asked as he ran his contacts over in his head.
Perth…Australia. Damn, that was far.
His flight time from Japan to Australia would take an entire day. Not to mention, his trip from Norway back to Japan was yet another day.
Dartz needed to hang in there, in case Valon wanted to try again.
"Unsafe!" Dartz snarled into the receiver. "It's a public clinic. I'm surrounded by other beds, anyone can just walk in. Including…Valon. And they're keeping me here for 3 days. I can't leave. I'm on a course of medication to clear my stomach. They might even keep me for a fourth day. I don't fucking know! I can walk out, but there's still poison in my system."
Yami let out a tight sigh and wanted to smash his head on the dresser surface. God… Dammit.
"You understand what you're asking for?" Yami began, itching to name his price, but for some reason, one didn't pop up instantly like they usually did.
Why was Dartz so…annoyingly different?
"Yes! Hurry!" And the lawyer hung up on him.
Ah, that's why, Yami stared dryly at his phone screen. The man wasn't scared of him. And he treated people who weren't scared of him with a special preference.
Walking out of the closet, Yami was slightly shocked to see Kaiba dressed in a suit and talking on the phone, sitting on the edge of the bed with his work laptop on his lap, and the 'play' laptop on a pillow. Shit. The real world was calling them both back.
"I'm borrowing this," Yami made sure to speak Japanese to Kaiba as he lifted the laptop off the pillow, and he received a tight irritated nod from the CEO.
Aww…
"Taking a call downstairs," Yami added, unsure if Kaiba could hear him, because Kaiba sounded like he was working and answering calendar questions about shifting meetings from his secretary.
Sitting down on the couch with a sigh, Yami made sure to plug his phone into the computer as he typed a number from memory into the contact box of a free VoIP service, quickly writing the text in English, "THIS IS /-\T3m! Don't block! Hello Mai…"
Yami paused and just decided to just say it.
"I have an easy target for you, and bonus, I'm about to 'help him out', so, do you want him first? As thanks for the earlier thing. He's a lawyer so im sure that's enough $$$$ for you. Reply if you want him. I'll send more details."
And he sent it.
Then he got up to make cups of coffee for himself and Kaiba, knowing Kaiba would become cranky fast if he wasn't on a constant drip of strong coffee…or sex.
The computer pinged, so Yami hurried back to check it, his heart racing with glee at Mai's response.
"DO I? Lawyers are my favorite meals. Thank you sweetie. Ok to send details. Hru? Done w seto kaiba yet honey bun?"
No, never, Yami laughed to himself as he typed his reply.
"Kaiba Seto is still mine, please don't assume otherwise even when I return him to his shiny tower. Enjoy this lawyer. The details are this: …"
He tapped away and quickly found Valon's professional profile and linked it to Mai in the text. Then, he sent another one.
"Careful. Valon poisoned his boss (my client), having tried to kill him once before and failed. I'd like you to keep Valon busy for the next three days and keep him away from any hospitals, mainly the one his boss is staying in. If you succeed, his boss is a high-level lawyer who can pay it forward."
Then he walked up the stairs to serve Kaiba the coffee he'd made.
Kaiba had moved to the desk in the connecting room and glanced up from his laptop, still on the phone, but he managed to thank Yami for the coffee with a nod and said, "wheels up in 2 hours. Sorry I gotta take this…" And he turned back to his phone call with Mokuba.
Yami nodded, when he returned to the other laptop, Mai had written a lengthy reply too.
"Pssh. don't accept drinks from guys who tried to kill you is 101. And Omg.
His boss is the guy I met with one time at a bar who …broke the good news to me about a certain trashbag excuse for a human man.
Ok I see this is related.
I will find and seduce this pathetic lawyer and keep him away from his phone and subordinates for this week. Give me time to book a ticket!
….BOOKED!
I'm flying into Adelaide in 4 hours since this was super last minute—had to get a connecting flight to Perth (where this wallet lives?) because I couldn't find a round trip to Perth on such short notice…and I'll make him reimburse me.
Don't worry about a thing hun.
I got you. (and your client) xo"
Just what I like to hear, Yami nodded and replied, "I'll send you Dartz's exact location when he wakes up from his medication. Thank you Mai. You're so reliable and I appreciate that."
"Yw robot voice! Knowing you're out there kxlling international rapists makes me sleep better at night! kisses!" Came her sassy reply, and Yami felt himself smile.
He never thought he'd ever ask her for anything, but here he was, asking. And it wasn't even a favor for himself. It was to keep Dartz alive.
Now, on his count, Dartz would owe him…four times.
He'd tally it up and come up with a bill, once and for all when he was on the plane to Australia.
Clicking through the settings to wipe the computer, Yami almost forgot that this was Kaiba's personal 'play' laptop, so he stopped himself from using Kaiba's credentials to hard reset. He merely wiped his activity and disabled the webcam feeds.
Right. Now, time to grab them out of the trees and pack up to babysit Kaiba back to Japan.
Dartz opened his eyes slowly and felt his throat and stomach burn.
Curse that idiot Valon.
He could hear the heart monitor beeping beside him and he wiggled his fingers, hating how he still felt dizzy and weak. Weak for calling Atem of all people, as if that would solve anything.
He had plenty of other legitimate sources to ask first–like the police, or a private investigator, but the contact at the very top of his burner phone was the letter A, and Dartz had pressed the name almost as if it was a reflex.
Because he didn't have to explain anything to that criminal, and Atem had been there from the very start when Valon had first attempted to kill him.
Atem would do anything 'if the price was right' according to his file, so…
Dartz sighed.
He knew the police wouldn't be much help. He could press minor charges on Valon who would skate away from it because they were both criminal lawyers.
What the hell kind of good would a PI do for him? Warn him the next time Valon wanted to make an attempt on his life again? He wasn't even at the firm anymore!
He'd saved up a couple million more.
This would be his life insurance.
Not the legitimate kind.
Valon was impossible to talk down.
What had he done to make that man hate him so much?
He closed his eyes and then opened them again, shocked to see a familiar face hovering above him.
A blonde beauty, with delicious red lips, eyes that glittered with a seductive mischief, her eyelashes long and elegant while thick curls of hair cascaded down her shoulders, highlighting an ample cleavage in a white top where he could faintly…see the outline of a lacy bra, hidden by the large leaves of a big bouquet of flowers.
Lord, an angel….
"Found youuuuu…!" Mai sang quietly as she circled the bed once, took a photo and then went to sit further away on a chair beside an empty bed. "Sending…proof…of…life. Done!"
Yami woke up briefly from his nap when his phone buzzed against his thigh.
The plane's engines roared in his ears and Seto was passed out beside him.
He dug his phone out and sleepily checked the image message from an unknown sender.
Mai?
It was a photo of Dartz looking pallid and disheveled in a hospital bed. His long hair was splayed out around his face, and four IV's were on each of his arms and Yami winced.
Oh, brink of death.
At least he was still alive.
Mai was even sending a second helpful text of Dartz's vitals, copied straight from the sheet beside his bed, and she even took a photo of that.
How sweet.
"Good. Still in the air, babysitting my CEO," Yami replied, eyeing Kaiba lovingly as he sent it. "...Will give you a ETA when I land in JP and secure a flight out to AU."
"OK gonna go get my wallet! $$$$" Mai answered lightning quick, then she tucked her phone back into her purse, shuffling the bouquet of flowers in her lap.
She opened her mouth to speak, but then saw her target walk right into the hospital, being led over by a nurse, so she hung her head and pretended to be in mourning, hunching her shoulders up and letting her hair hang down past the sides of her face to hide it.
No one talked to a woman crying alone in a hospital, clutching a bunch of flowers.
Dartz was about to ask if Atem had hired her to check on him when he froze and saw Valon come striding up to the foot of his bed and give him a wide, evil smile.
The beeping of Dartz's heart monitor could be heard speeding up, and the nurse looked alarmed for a moment, rushing over to attend to it and nodding at the guest, "nothing to be worried about. He's happy to see you."
"He should be," Valon drawled, waving the nurse away with a wiggle of his fingers. "Off you go. I want some alone-time."
Dartz clenched his fists at his sides and willed himself to remain calm.
He would not let this man win.
He'd already given Valon half of his practice and his reputation.
What else did this man want?
My life… Dartz kept his gaze fixed on the ceiling, unwilling to give Valon any eye contact.
"I've got something for you," Valon said with a smirk. "But let's clear the room, shall we?"
He turned to face the woman hunched up by the far end of the room, calling out to her, "excuse us! Miss …Hey, could you leave?"
No, fucker, Mai hung her head further and began to openly sob, taking in deep breaths and letting it out shakily while shoving her face in the flowers to make the pollen irritate her nose and eyes.
Valon had come to finish the job, as Atem had suspected.
"Leave her alone. She's clearly in mourning," Dartz said as he hoped that was what Mai was play-acting. His knowledge of this woman was that she was a ruthless con artist who targeted elite men, and that she was smart and formidable. Most importantly, he knew the assassin had her under his wing.
Valon glared at the crying woman and rolled his eyes.
"Okay uppity up, let's get you outside, okay darling?" Valon walked up to her and sat beside her with a tired sigh. He couldn't kill Dartz with her sitting right here being a witness.
He tensed in shock when she slowly snaked her arm through his and nodded, still hanging her head over the bouquet and tugging him to his feet. So he rose up and followed, giving Dartz a nod as he walked by, pointing at him, "be right back mate."
And the woman led him out of the clinic, out into the sunshine, raising her head up to give him a thankful nod. Her eyes were bloodshot and slightly puffy from crying, but Valon instantly felt as if a cupid's arrow had struck him through the heart when she made eye contact with him.
She looked like…an angel.
Her hair was curled effortlessly, tumbling down her shoulders to nicely frame her chest…bursting at the seams with a wrinkle of lacy bra underneath the tight shirt, the rest…hidden by the bouquet of flowers she was gripping in her nicely manicured hands. Hands that didn't have a ring, but she wore a girly friendship bracelet and a plain little watch.
A sweetheart.
"What's wrong, baby?" Valon spoke before he could stop himself, and he wanted to kick himself for calling her a pet name on instinct, but she took it well and even smiled a little before slipping back into a tearful grimace.
"My s-sister…got taken…off the…" Mai didn't finish her sentence and lowered her chin into the flowers. "I'm so lost without her. I don't know what to do. We were best friends."
Now a scumbag like this man would instantly offer to be 'her friend'.
"Aw, let's make you feel better, huh? How about a…cuppa? I know a nice place, not too far from here," he offered, already regretting asking, because he knew she was going to instantly say 'no'. She probably had a boyfriend even if she had no ring. But the way she hung onto his arm was giving him hope.
"It's…f-fine, you have your…friend you were visiting," Mai said with the best shaky voice she could manage as she pressed the bouquet tighter to her chest, turning away to walk. "See you later, Prince Charming."
She was taking a risk, and usually they paid off. Walking away from the target right after crying on his arm and calling him prince charming usually did the trick. Better strut her stuff so he would stare at her ass a bit more.
Thunderstruck, Valon stood in the middle of the sidewalk and watched the beautiful woman walk away. He was letting a stunning beauty walk away! She needed help because she almost tripped into the metal edge of the trash can and had to evade it by side-stepping, looking like she was crying into the flowers again, and his heart wrenched for her.
Dartz could wait.
That man was crippled in a hospital bed being stomach pumped.
Come on! Come on, you piece of…! Mai was cursing Valon as she watched the man in the reflection of the cafe windows she was passing. He was open-mouthed gaping at her butt.
Now would he come running?!
Yes, because he barreled forward like a fool with his arm raised, calling out, "w-wait! …I'll…help you find a seat at the cafe!"
Got himmmm, Mai sang as she chinned the bouquet and turned to give the man an eye-fluttering smile, patting away a pollen induced tear from her lower lids, hoping her mascara smudged. She'd worn a non-waterproof one to cry it off for drama, just in case.
Anything for Atem.
That ghost-assassin was her real knight in shining armor, no one could top him.
She looped her arm through his again and let him yammer about a stupid cafe, keeping the numbers about this guy in her head tight.
This lawyer was worth 2.5 million.
If she could drain him dry, she could replace him with a handbag that didn't talk and was way prettier.
Then Atem could put all the bullets he wanted into him, and she'd feel zero guilt, knowing this guy wouldn't come drunk-lusting after her on some random holiday.
Perfect!
Inside the clinic, Dartz raised his head and eyed the door nervously.
No one was coming back.
An hour had passed, coming up to two.
Incredible. She has him, Dartz leaned his head back onto the pillow and dared to close his eyes.
Atem had saved him from afar, somehow.
That assassin was treating him with preference, for some reason. No price had been named yet, and Dartz secretly dreaded the moment Atem would ask for a return favor.
What could he possibly do for that man that didn't involve murder?
He was a lawyer, not God.
Guess I'll find out, Dartz thought tiredly as he raised his pale hand and stared at the pulse monitor strapped to his index finger and at the tubes coming out of his arms.
Author's note:
Woooooo mai comes to the rescuuuue (nods to canon at valon's crush for mai)