Gray wondered if it was possible to never sleep again. He was pretty sure it wasn't - if it was, Jellal would have come up with a way to do it by now. But maybe he could go…another day or two? A week? The idea of sleeping, of closing his eyes and letting the darkness take him, felt completely overwhelming. He didn't need to. He didn't want to.

He couldn't.

He was in bed with Natsu, who was clearly gone to the world. On his back, one ankle looped over Gray's leg, snoring in a way that would have been horrible if Gray wasn't so used to it. Gray still didn't really know what Natsu had gone through that week that he had been gone. He probably would never actually understand. But he was pretty sure Natsu hadn't been taking care of himself very well - not sleeping or eating much. He was probably exhausted. He definitely needed the sleep.

Gray thought he might need the sleep too, although he wasn't really sure. Did being dead count as sleeping? Maybe, if he laid here long enough, he would eventually get so exhausted that he would have no choice but to close his eyes. Sleep would claim him without the need for him to be so scared first.

Gray kind of wanted to wake Natsu up, just so he wouldn't be alone, but he resisted. Eventually, he realized that lying here was pointless, and he was so restless he was making himself anxious. Maybe sleep would come easier in…an hour or two.

Gray carefully slipped his leg out from under Natsu's, and rolled off the bed. Natsu was a pretty deep sleeper, so he wasn't worried about this, and he wasn't worried about flicking the lights on either. He should be able to move around the room pretty easily without waking Natsu up.

Gray wasn't going to sleep right now, and he wasn't going to feel normal until all his stuff was back in place, so he figured he might as well kill two birds with one stone and try to clean up some of his stuff from the pile. Natsu had really grabbed everything, and Gray honestly thought it was going to take a while to put it all back. No one had really told him yet when he was supposed to go after Magnus again, but he hoped he could clean it all up before…before….

Gray wasn't very good at cleaning, but he thought he had been making pretty good progress when he heard a small sound from the bed. He looked back - Natsu had rolled over, and his arms were twitching like he was flailing in his dream.

That was normal enough, at least for Natsu. The Dragon Slayer was usually a pretty active sleeper, and Gray had sometimes been woken up by an inadvertent slap to the face. He wasn't worried, at least not until Natsu started whimpering.

"Gray?!" Natsu yelped, shooting upright. Gray saw his eyes flicker open, and he stepped back towards the bed, but he was tired and sore and just not fast enough. Natsu looked down at the empty bed beside him, his face crumpling as he dissolved into sobs.

"Natsu, no, wait, I'm here," Gray said, stumbling back towards Natsu and feeling a heavy guilt sink into his stomach. "I'm here, it's me-"

"G-Gray," Natsu whimpered. He collapsed back onto the bed, curling himself into a tight shaking ball.

"Oh my god, Natsu," Gray whispered, trying not to break down himself. He slumped down beside his partner, stroking Natsu's hair all the way down to the nape of his neck. "Natsu, I'm here, alright? Nothing happened to me."

Natsu shook helplessly, turning his face deeper into the bedclothes. Gray could still hear him crying, and he wasn't showing any signs of stopping.

"Natsu, it's me. I'm still here, okay?" This time, Gray lay down next to Natsu, pulling him into his arms. The angle was a little weird, since Gray didn't want to reopen his healing stomach wound, and it still hurt him a little. But he didn't care. He squirmed around until Natsu's head was tucked against his shoulder, and Gray rested his chin in the top of Natsu's hair. "I've got you. It was just a dream. I'm here."

"I thought-" Natsu choked out, then tapered off. "I dreamed you were…gone. An' I woke up, and I couldn't find ya, and I thought-"

"I'm sorry," Gray said miserably. "I…I was just cleaning up, Natsu. I'm still here. I'm gonna stay right here."

He felt Natsu nod against him, but he didn't stop crying. Gray pulled him a little closer, and Natsu's hand wrapped itself around his side. Gray's wound protested with a stab of pain, but Gray swallowed it down without reacting. He wasn't going to let go of Natsu right now, not for anything.

In all the long years they'd been sharing a bed, Gray had never seen Natsu react like this to a dream. He had nightmares occasionally, of course - by now they all did. Gray had seen him thrash around, even scream, in his sleep only to wake up, shake his head drowsily, and go right back to sleep. This was different. This dream, about losing Gray, had him utterly beside himself.

"I'm okay," Gray said, almost mechanically. "I'm right here. I've got ya. I'm not leaving you again."

Or at least, if I do, it won't be in the middle of the night, Gray thought. But he resisted any urge he had to say this to Natsu. He hoped and prayed Natsu would just never have to wake up to an empty bed at all.

After a while, Natsu stopped crying. Gray's wound was still burning slightly - clearly not as healed as it looked from the outside. But he still didn't want to let go of Natsu. He waited as Natsu's breathing deepened, as his limbs got heavy and pliant. Eventually, Gray could tell he was asleep, but he still didn't want to let go.

Gray sighed, tugged Natsu slightly closer, kissed the top of his head. Finally, finally, Gray could feel sleep dragging at him. Maybe he'd be able to get some rest. He certainly wasn't leaving the bed anyways.

It took a while, and some deep-breathing, but eventually, Gray calmed down enough to close his eyes. Huddled against Natsu like the survivors of some grand disaster, he let sleep claim him.

Lucy thought it had been…two days since the resurrection? No, three. She thought it was three, although it was hard to be completely sure. She hadn't been getting much sleep, and what sleep she did get wasn't always at night. It seemed that there was almost something that needed to be done. First she was bringing Natsu and Gray food, waiting with them to make sure they actually ate it. Then it was flowers for Jellal's hospital room, food for Erza too. A hospital visit for herself, for another examination of her broken arm - she was supposed to be getting regular healing sessions from Wendy, but Wendy was still weak from the resurrection, and that obviously couldn't happen. Then she was helping Levy and Freed research, then fielding Gray's endless questions about the week he'd been gone, then organizing care packages to be sent to the members of the Guild who were still fighting Lamia Scale….

Part of her knew that she didn't have to be doing all this. But even though she knew she wasn't the strongest fighter, she liked feeling useful. All these things had to happen too. And she was too busy to really be tired.

Still, it was starting to catch up to her. She'd intended to take a long nap today, once she'd visited Natsu and Gray one more time (largely to reassure herself that Gray was still alive). But then, she'd received a message from Makarov summoning her to a strategy meeting at the Guild Hall. He'd asked for Loke too, which frightened Lucy more than it reassured her. Loke was still a member of Fairy Tail, but the rest of the Guild seemed to forget that in all but the most dire circumstances. Lucy knew that beating Magnus obviously counted, but she didn't want the reminder just yet. She wanted to celebrate Gray's return, not immediately send him back out to face the same threat that had killed him.

But they were running out of time, and Lucy wasn't going to make this harder on Natsu, Gray, and Erza. She checked in with Loke, who had healed from the wound he'd gotten during the last battle, and they made their way to the Guild Hall.

She didn't have to ask where to go when she arrived. The meeting would be held in the Guild library, beneath the main hall. That's where all of their strategy meetings had been held. Even before Gray's resurrection, they'd felt the need for secrecy. The library walls were thick, and it was underground, well able to withstand an attack from above.

The room was mostly full when she entered. Makarov was sitting at the head of the long reading table (now converted into something like the war rooms she'd seen in old lacrimas). Mira was sitting to his left, as always. Freed and Levy were at the end of the table, poring over one of the tattered books that Lucy had practically memorized over the past few days. Wendy was there with Carla, and even Porlyusica was slouched angrily in a chair pushed a little ways away from the table. At first, she didn't see Natsu, Gray, or Happy, nearly melting into the shadows at the back. Happy was perched on Natsu's shoulder, wearing the same expression of distress that he'd had since Gray had died. Natsu looked exhausted, and a little confused, and very tense. Gray was tucked into his side. He looked better than he had that first night, but he still didn't look normal. He was pale, even for Gray, and he was carrying himself like he was in pain.

Lucy wanted to go over to them, but she knew that wouldn't be helpful. They clearly weren't paying much attention, and she might need to fill them in later. Instead, she slid into one of the empty seats at the table.

"Where's Erza?" she asked, looking around as Loke sat next to her.

"Here." Erza's voice was unmistakable, as was the clanking sound of her armor as she came down the stairs. She slid past Lucy, tired and drawn, holding something wrapped in cloth. "I apologize for my lateness."

"Don't," Makarov said firmly. "Thank you all for coming."

Erza answered with a nod, then knelt down beside Natsu and Gray. She held out her bundle to Gray, who blinked at her with confusion.

"Your sword," she said.

"Oh," he said blankly. There was an odd expression on his face, and Lucy got the impression that he really didn't want to reach out and take it. "Do I have to-?"

"You should probably be the one to carry it again from now on," Erza said gently.

"R-right." Gray took the sword, still looking nervous. However, as soon as he did, he seemed to perk up some. The energy it fed him was probably helping.

Lucy looked over at Natsu, and realized his face was tight. Almost angry. He didn't say anything though, just glowered and shifted over so Gray could set the sword on his other side.

"Where's Laxus?" Erza asked, looking around. "I thought he would be here by now."

"We contacted him," Makarov said. "He's on his way. I'm sure he'll arrive before we disperse."

Laxus had been called back from the front lines, where he'd been helping to slow Lamia Scale. To Lucy's understanding, he knew very little about what had happened with Magnus since he'd left with the others, over two weeks ago at this point. He didn't know Gray had died - none of the Guild members fighting Lamia Scale did. He presumably didn't even know exactly what he was being called back for - just that he was needed to do something important.

No one had outright said it, but it was clear that Laxus was being brought back as a replacement for Jellal. At least right now, Jellal was showing absolutely no signs of waking up, and without him, the Strongest Team was down their ace in the hole. Gray was still weak, Natsu was still…distant, and they couldn't make their second assault on Magnus without another very, very strong wizard.

Levy and Freed had been doing pretty much non-stop research, assisted by Lucy when she had the time, and they were pretty sure Magnus had pulled back into the tunnels beneath the Hakobe mountains. It made sense - he'd been hurt when they'd last seen him, and if nothing else the Strongest Team had done quite a bit of damage to his shadowy forces. He could summon more, but it would surely take energy and time, and he would need somewhere safe to do it. And these tunnels were the same place he'd originally emerged from, the same place he'd hidden Oblatio, and it only made sense that he'd go back there now. They didn't know exactly where he'd be, and they also didn't know exactly how strong he was, but knowing they needed to make their assault on the tunnels was at least a place to start.

They didn't want to delay leaving too long, as every day they waited gave Magnus more of a chance to discover that Gray was still alive. But it was clear Gray needed longer to recover physically, if he were to have any chance of surviving the mission at all. He was still weak and pale, struggling to keep down food, hardly sleeping. Lucy wasn't sure what difference a few days would make - he'd died, after all - but they needed to take what they could get. In addition, they could use the extra few days to try to gather as much information as possible.

No one said it, but Lucy knew that another part of the reason they were delaying was hope that Jellal would wake up. No one at the hospital had been able to give them a much clearer prognosis - they wouldn't be able to predict when (or if) Jellal would wake. Like the rest of Fairy Tail, Lucy hoped that by some miracle, he would wake up before they had to leave to fight Magnus. And somehow…be fine. But that all seemed unlikely, and they were planning on the assumption that Jellal would definitely not be joining them.

"We should keep the strike force small," Erza said. Her voice was remarkably steady, and Lucy was caught between admiration at her strength and the fear that Erza was ignoring her own emotional health to keep herself going.

Makarov nodded. "Natsu, Gray, Erza, Lucy, Wendy, and Laxus will go."

"And me and Carla," Happy piped up from his place on Natsu's shoulder. "You guys are always forgetting us, but we're part of the Strongest Team too!"

"Not this time." Makarov, for once, sounded his age. "I can't ask that of you."

"But-"

"It's too dangerous, little buddy," Natsu said. He was speaking for the first time, and to Lucy's surprise, he sounded almost normal. It was only when she listened closely that she heard the undercurrent of tension in his voice.

Happy frowned. "Natsu, what are you gonna do without me? You'll probably forget to pack anything good, and you can't read maps, and what if there's something moving? You're just gonna puke Magnus to death, huh?"

"Happy." Gray sounded a little stronger now that he had the sword in his hand, and more confident as well. "Please. Stay behind. I don't want you to…. Natsu needs you safe. We all need you safe."

Happy's face crumpled. "But how am I supposed to make sure you guys are alright?" he whispered, holding onto Natsu's scarf like a lifeline.

"Tomcat," Carla said, without her usual sharpness. "If that's what they require, so be it. We'll stay behind."

Makarov nodded, turning back to the table.

"That makes sense," Wendy said, clearly trying very hard not to look at Carla. "Um, what should we do about Jellal?"

"What do you mean do?" Erza's voice was sharp, and Lucy saw her whole body stiffen.

"Should we write him a note or something?" Mira asked. "What if he wakes up while your team is gone? Wouldn't he want to know right away that he brought Gray back?"

Wendy cleared her throat. "That wasn't…quite what I meant."

"What…?"

"The last time I pulled him out of a coma was when we were fighting Oracion Seis," Wendy said carefully. "He was…confused. He was hurting people. Smiting people without even…knowing who they were. He was dangerous, he was out of control. He could have hurt himself, he could have-"

"He didn't have any memories then," Erza said.

"Do you really think there's no chance of that happening again? If he wakes up all alone in the hospital?"

Erza paled, and Lucy saw her swallow hard.

"I can't stay with him," Erza whispered.

"I'll stay," Lucy said. She almost wasn't aware of saying it, until the words were out of her mouth. "I know it's not the same as you staying. But he knows me. He's known me for years. If he starts panicking, I'll…well, I don't know that I can calm him down. But I can handle myself."

"Lucy-" Erza started.

Lucy found herself blinking back sudden and unexpected tears. "My arm is still hurt. And Wendy, don't you dare offer to heal it. Your magic is needed for more important things." Lucy paused. "I know I'm not that much of a fighter. But I can do this. I want to do this. Jellal…Jellal brought us Gray back. So I want to take care of him. I don't want him to wake up and be scared."

All around the table, Lucy saw faces softening. Even though Jellal had been part of Fairy Tail for years, there were still people who were wary of him, both because of his past and because of…well, his personality. But when he came back - and Lucy was sure that he would - Lucy didn't think that that would be a problem anymore. Jellal had returned Gray to them. He had earned himself respect, but also the sort of tenderness and love that was reserved for the most integral members of Fairy Tail.

"Thank you, Lucy," Erza said. The genuine relief on her face made Lucy ache. Lucy didn't even want to imagine being in Erza's position, and not for the first time, she thanked her lucky stars that she had a nearly indestructible boyfriend.

"I can act as a messenger," Loke said. "I can open my own gate anywhere now. If Erza and the others need to pass a message to Lucy, or if something…or if Jellal wakes up, I can let everyone know."

Lucy was pretty sure she was the only one that heard the slight tension in Loke's voice. Yes, Loke could open his own gate, and appear anywhere on Earthland, but it cost an insane amount of magical power. When Lucy called him, or when he crossed over with her assistance, they could share the burden, and some of it was alleviated by the contract they'd made. But if he came to Earthland alone, especially in a different location than her own, it would wear him out very, very fast. It wouldn't be deadly, not for the Leader of the Zodiac, but it would be painful.

Lucy didn't think anybody else at the table knew exactly what Loke was offering to do. Ordinarily, she would have asked him to reconsider, to put himself first for once in his life.

But they didn't have a choice. The strike team needed powerful wizards, and they also needed an untraceable way to keep in contact with the command center at the Guild Hall. Loke's assistance in both directions would be invaluable.

"Thank you," Erza said again, her voice shaking ever so slightly.

Lucy didn't say anything. If she admitted to the others how hard this would be on Loke, they would all push back. He knew that, which is why he hadn't told them himself. It felt wrong to just sit there in silence, but they were all making sacrifices. It wouldn't be fair to stop Loke from doing the same.