Whirlipede - Entoma

Dwebble - Gargantua

Wimpod - Cocytus

Heracross - Kyouhukou

Ribombee - Leinas

As I stared at the bay on Route 1, I realized an error I had made. I did not have a Pokémon who could surf. That would have been more significant if I hadn't decided to make this a pleasant, sightseeing trip, so the views more than made up for it.

There's nothing as nostalgic as the first route of your childhood pokémon game projected into reality.

The second town of the game, Accumula, was surprisingly urban and had some solid food. It was nostalgic of my old life, so it gets a pass. The first town, Nuvema, was notably less nostalgic as it was clearly a unique, small town. In my dream world, this place would consist of four total buildings.

Route 1 was what I loved, though. It was one of those genuinely wonderful experiences, a casual walk through my past, and bantering with Roxie while experiencing it was great.

I brutally emasculated several toddlers in blood sports all the while. There was no money in the fights, I just figured I needed the experience for my hopeful future of crushing those weaker than me beneath my heel.

Roxie seemed to find it funny when I whipped out my pokemon equivalent of a table saw on a child's small dog, so it was group entertainment. I am an entertainer at heart.

It was a quick loop, only taking a day to walk the stretch. Then, it's back to Straiton for my gym badge.

I expect it to go well.

"You ready?" Roxie asked.

"Yeah. I'm ready," I smiled confidently— dare I say, arrogantly?

I pushed open the doors to the restaurant, slowly pacing into the building. Walking up to the waiter at the front desk, I spoke.

"I'm here for a gym battle."

"Excellent. Could I please see your trainer ID?"

A quick scan and I was put in queue for a fight. The fights would be in the center of the restaurant, in a standard medium dirt-and-rock combat field. The onlookers would be protected from the fight by league-sponsored Reuniclus providing psychic barriers.

I literally was participating in blood sports, minus the blood, for the most part. I was sending my Pokemon out in a gym battle as entertainment for some onlooking eaters. My dreams of living out Gladiator would come true. Well, as someone signing someone else up for blood sports. I would get participation points in Pokemon society for being the trainer. Did that make me the slaver in this Gladiator metaphor?

After a short wait, I was led to the arena. It was a surprisingly fancy place, the entire room organized around the central field with big screens with an image of my face and an image of the three chromatic gym leaders side by side.

A smooth voice sounded over the intercom, "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Striaton Gym. Today, the challenging trainer will be Nico Moore. Please welcome him to the field."

A light smattering of polite clapping sounded through the restaurant. A couple people gave small cheers, but overall the welcome was reserved. Not dismayed, I strutted forward. As I did so, the screens around the room swapped to a live feed of the arena.

"And introducing the three Striaton Gym Leaders: Cilan, Chili, and Cress!"

The crowd cheered. To my right, I spotted a betting board. 3 to 1 odds against me. I was a little dismayed.

The three gym leaders walked up, did a spin, and posed. They are insane.

"Welcome, challenger!" the green one greeted from the center, "We welcome you to our gym. In the interest of this gym serving as a challenge to test your skills as a trainer, we ask you what type of Pokemon you plan to bring into this battle first?"

"I'll use a bug type."

"Excellent," He smiled, "You will be fighting my brother, Chili. It will be a 2v2, assuming you have the Pokemon for it?"

Exactly as expected, I nodded. The miscellaneous siblings left, leaving the only obstacle in my way to enter into the trainer's box. I entered my own, and psychic shields sprang up.

The fool released a Pansear. I released Cocytus and smiled.

"Well, that kind of defeats the point of it," Chili mused, "But I suppose it's not against the rules to predict we'll use a type advantage. We don't see many bug-water types here, so it's a bit of an unusual fight for me."

The countdown began. I could feel my vision narrow. I was out for blood.

The countdown ended. "Cocytus, zone with water pulses."

Cocytus instantly began. We had prepared a more cowardly fighting style for him. He'd shoot off weak, fast Water Pulses, hoping to chip down their health.

"Pansear! Avoid them and move in!"

That began phase two of the battle. The pansear hopped around Cocytus' pattern of fire, approaching quickly. Then, the Pansear jumped to the side to avoid the usual attack pattern, only to realize that an attack had not come.

Cocytus had instead charged up a water pulse with as much power as he could muster, releasing it after a short delay. The shot of water smashed into the monkey's chest, shocking it backward.

"Pansear! Dig!"

Giving up on the approach that easily? That was your best option, you just need to get in and deal a bit of damage to make a Wimpod give up.

The pansear, like an oil company, drilled into the ground, pitifully unaware of the harm of doing so.

"Cocytus, dump some water in there."

Water Gun was easily replicated from Water Pulse, making drowning the fire monkey in its self-dug grave easy.

"I surrender," Chili easily admitted.

My head flicked up to stare at Chili. In a flash, the Reuniclus teleported the Pansear out of the pit and into Chili's trainer box. That was it?

"Well done!" Chili called out to me. "You developed mix-ups in your firing pattern and effectively took advantage of an environmental counter! You are performing phenomenally for a first gym battle! Let's see how you deal without a type advantage, though."

It was a test, after all.

"Lillipup, go! Work up!"

That felt dangerous. It always did in the game, but a single attack buff wasn't truly much of a threat. It was something I had to stop from building up, though.

"Punish that with a water pulse."

Cocytus let the Lillipup channel the energy, charging up a powerful water pulse. When the Lillipup had fully committed, he blasted the water into its dumb dog face. As a result, the dog managed to get the buff off.

"Quick attack!" Chili declared.

The dog shot forward into Wimpod, sending him bouncing away. It was a pretty pathetic sight, the bug thrashing through the air, not looking like the bug that solo-ed a gym Pokemon any longer.

Cocytus hit the ground upright and in a panic. He fearfully scurried back to me, whimpering and begging to go back into his ball.

I really hope I can figure out how to raise the coward bug stereotype to be fearless. I imagine he will be quite the horror as a six-foot-tall armored bug demon, and I don't want that to be ruined by an effective half-health limitation.

I recalled Cocytus and thought for a moment. It was either Kyou or Entoma. Kyou was the objectively correct choice from a type-advantage perspective. That being said, Kyou hadn't seen any battle outside our group, so I was hesitant to release him into a Gym Battle. Entoma had Iron Defense and brute force, which fit more into the "no type advantage" thing Chili seemed to be clinging onto for the sake of his dignity.

Always a good entertainer, I opened my pokeball, revealing Entoma. Chili didn't seem all that surprised at my second-stage mon, which took some of the fun out of pulling out over-leveled pokemon.

"Iron Defense," I opened.

Entoma rapidly began to harden her shell, but Chili was not letting that slide.

"Work Up, again!" he commanded his lapdog, who gathered up the energy again. We broke into a power-up stalemate, my increased defense rendered null by his power-up.

"Build up speed! Try to hit Poison Stings!"

Entoma rapidly began to spin around the room, occasionally shooting off a few poison barbs at her prey. I could see her eyes: deadly focus on the task at hand. I wouldn't be surprised if she was experiencing tunnel vision, her focus was so entranced. She was fully prepared to grind a small pet into the ground, to the joy or dismay of onlookers.

I was proud.

Lillipup deftly dodged the Poison Stings, easily able to avoid them at full strength.

"Attack with Rollout!"

She took advantage of her built-up momentum to launch in a genuinely dangerous-looking charge, horns spinning so fast they gave the illusion of rotating blades.

"Meet it head-on with a Take Down," Chili willingly risked his little Pokemon.

Lillipup steeled itself with a surprisingly grim expression for such a small Pokemon before charging into Entoma's charge. It made me feel as if I was putting a comic relief animal character through a traumatizing backstory.

The Take Down met with the Rollout, and suddenly both combatants were knocked away from each other. Entoma was largely unharmed, iron defense providing more than enough protection. The Lillipup could not say the same, wounded from both a head-on attack and the damage of stopping it with a recoil move.

"Poison Sting, Entoma."

This made both fighters stir from their post-attack shock. Entoma quickly shot into action, shooting venomous barbs at the injured pokemon. Lillipup struggled to get out of the way, managing to get away just after the first few pins had already hit.

The dog was poisoned, even if only mildly. We were winning this one.

"Aggressive pressure with Poison Tail; Make sure he doesn't have any chance to recover."

Entoma began to move again, spinning around the Lillipup in a circle pattern, forcing the Pokemon to burn its energy trying to keep its eyes on her. Every once in a while, she'd suddenly break from the pattern and charge with her spines covered in poison, forcing the exhausted animal to scramble out of the way.

"Hit it with a quick attack!" Chili called, "Aim where it's going to be."

The dog concentrated, following Entoma's circling. I waited, preparing for its attack. As the dog's paws lit up, I called out to my starter.

"90 degrees right! Poison Tail!"

Lillipup launched at Entoma, who abruptly drifted, contorting her body to face the oncoming canine. Her spines lit up with energy and, fueled by the whiplash of the quick turn, caught Lillipup mid-quick attack, driving it into the ground and trampling it as she mowed it over. She almost seemed to spin on the spot above the dog, grinding down with violent spite.

The battle was over. I won. After all, I deserved it.

So, this is what success feels like?

I just beat 3:1 odds against me. I cost a bunch of people who betted against me at least a little bit of money. I just publicly and officially kicked this guy's ass. I technically had a clean sweep since Cocytus had only taken the coward's way out, not been truly beaten. His soul and ballsack were demonstrably mine.

But of course I won. This was the test for bug catchers who spammed Harden with their metapod to fail. I loved a free win, but that fight was honestly pretty close. It was clear that I had not been grinding my levels enough; my unceasing crusade against any native wildlife unfortunate enough to lay in the trail of carnage I carved as I traveled Unova was not enough to powerlevel me past the first gym.

A free victory is something I'll gladly take, but this did not feel like a free victory.

I need to challenge trainers more often. But that would impede my ability to travel, and I've been more comfortable sleeping in the woods than usual.

Huh, thinking of it like that, it sounds like some sort of worrying lack of self-preservation I've suddenly developed. There's something special about sleeping under the stars or even just hiding under a tent if it's rainy or something.

That sounds unusually like a wild justification, considering my previous distinct preference.

As I took the badge from Chili and held it up to the crowd in a mocking display, I received a few boos and a decent cheering from who must be the lucky people who betted on me. But now, I started to think about Lenora.

I didn't want to have a close fight with her. She already disliked me from the whole Relic Castle debacle, and I don't doubt she'd be willing to step up her game just enough to make sure to beat me once and have me come back for seconds.

I needed a training arc or a blessing from god. What could the training arc be? The only thing that makes sense is the next best kind of arc:

The tournament arc.

My hunch was right. There were a plethora of local low-level tournaments for me to crusade through. The first badge brackets were the ones with the best-listed rewards that I could participate in, and each badge level grew exponentially more worthwhile to participate in. As long as you win, of course.

More specifically, there was a team doubles tournament in Accumula, so Roxie and I were traveling there, camping out the days we needed to wait. Speaking of, I got a more fancy bedroll. It was such a worthwhile investment, making sleeping outdoors even better.

"Kyou, Gar," I sat in front of my team, giving them a speech. "We need to get you two into shape. As a Heracross, you are extremely powerful against normal types. And as a Dwebble, you are resistant to their attacks. You'll be fighting in a tournament in preparation for the gym.

"For training, I've decided to make things a bit more interesting. Exercises are good, but battle practice is more valuable at this point. Most of the time, I'm going to have you split into pairs and battle each other. I'll see about getting Roxie's pokemon in on those fights to fill any gaps. I want you to focus on learning what works and what doesn't against each of your partners and develop your own strategies. I'll give pointers where applicable, but if there's a specific fighting style you prefer, I'd prefer to make you monstrous in it compared to just being effective in my more versatile strategies."

Roxie had also gotten the first badge, but it wasn't particularly interesting. Turns out her highly trained Whirlipede was just too much for any of the first-gym level Pokemon to handle.

"For training," I grinned sinisterly, watching as my Pokemon's eyes slightly dilated, "I want to keep you on your toes and used to fighting things stronger than you should face. As such, I'll have you split into trios, and take turns ganging up in 2v1s. Normally, I'd keep it fair," my grin widened, their pupils shrunk more, "but as Kyou and Gar are going to be participating in a tournament soon, it's only fair to give them double shifts in their 2v1s to help toughen them a bit. Up until their last day, of course, I'll show some mercy and let you rest up before the tournament."

Leinas was the only one to look at the pair with pity. Entoma seemed surprisingly disappointed at not being targeted in a 2v1 more often, but she's always been the most training-oriented. The pair of targeted individuals actually seemed surprisingly cool with the idea. Way to ruin my fun.

"Now, don't take this as a punishment. Nothing of the sort. In fact, outside spars, I'm going to be working extra close with you. I've got some good ideas, but we'll need to get Entoma in on this…"

Roxie and I stood together in the trainer's box on an Accumula battlefield. The spiels about the history of the tournament and all of that were uninteresting. All that mattered was the fights we were prepared for.

The tournament was pretty small, with only fifteen teams signed up. We weren't the lucky team who didn't have to face anyone in the first round, but we were lucky enough to fight and subsequently obliterate some twins with an unfortunate grass type team. Our Whirlipedes were simply more than they could handle.

We still had one round where we were restricted to one Pokemon, then it opened up into double-doubles.

This round was against some rich kid stereotype and a younger girl who looked like she had sleeping problems. Hopefully that lack of sleep was from stress about this tournament, as I'd love it if my opponent were too jittery to fight properly.

The announcer counted us down, and we all tossed out our Pokemon. The rich kid sent out a Purrloin, Ms. No-Sleep sent out a Darumaka, Roxie sent her Grimer, and I sent out Leinas.

"I'll take the Purrloin, you take the Darumaka?" I asked Roxie.

"You got it, dude!" She smiled, "Grimer! Mud-slap the Darumaka!"

Her Grimer burbled and blasted some mud at the fire-type, signifying the true start of the fight.

"Leinas, get high and start bombarding with Fairy Wind."

Leinas was a surprisingly powerful Pokemon. I should have figured it out from her already being in her final evolution, but she was genuinely the most dangerous Pokemon I had, excepting type disadvantages. She rarely won against Entoma, but fairy-types just can't handle Poison all that well.

She definitely wasn't the hardest hitting, either, but her utility didn't come from being able to DPS or Tank.

My little bee buzzed up at a rapid speed, flying high above the Purrloin. She circled above, letting out blasts of fairy-type wind at unpredictable timings. The rich kid seemed at a loss of what to do, not sure how to counter my long-distance attacks with his pathetic cat. He just called out moves, hoping for the best.

Eventually, he landed on "Assist!"

His Purrloin managed to actually surprise me, shooting out a quick shot of… Flame Burst, maybe… that managed to catch Leinas in the middle of an attack. Her Fairy Wind still hit true, but she was now somewhat injured.

"Leinas, recover with Pollen Puffs!"

It turns out that having unlimited access to a healing move was a little busted. It wasn't truly unlimited, she'd have to restock her pollen reserves eventually, but it was definitely a nice option to have.

Seeing that the rich kid was getting nowhere, my bug just cheerfully chomped on some pollen. The rich kid finally had the epiphany that this was a double battle.

"Purrloin! Help out Darumaka! Fury Swipes!"

I refocused on the other half of the battle, spotting a slightly scorched Grimer enveloping its opponent in what must be the most disgusting grab imaginable. The Darumaka itself looked notably ill, but whether that was from the smell, feeling, or toxicity of the Grimer was up for debate.

Purrloin rushed in with a plethora of swipes, giving Darumaka the opportunity to break free. The two scrambled away from the Grimer, trying to get some distance.

"Nico," Roxie turned to me, casually asking, "You able to get me a distraction?"

"Leinas!" I called out in lieu of an answer, "Hit and run with Draining Kiss and Pollen Puff!"

Leinas was well and healed to full again, prepared to fight again. She darted forward, beginning an onslaught of attacks. She was close enough to bait out attacks but had plenty of space to back out whenever the pair tried to deal with her.

I directed her to back off more than a couple times, a 2v1 fight not unfamiliar to her due to our own training exercises, but she was being risky.

"Now!" Roxie called out. Grimer belched. It wasn't a normal belch: it was a noxious cloud of fumes that swept over the field towards the pair of enemy pokemon. The moment the cloud swept over the Pokemon, the pair began to hack and wheeze, forced to their knees in immediate toxin response.

Leinas wasn't entirely unscathed, having caught a whiff of the edges of the cloud. In primal type-disadvantage fueled fear, she had immediately fled as far up and away as she could.

Roxie kicked my foot to grab my attention, smugly smiled, and boisterously boasted, "Crazy what you can do if you let a poison gas attack build up, right? How do you think that compares to your bug types?"

"I don't know, but I'm sure you know how we'll compare in the future," I smirked at her.

"Is that a challenge?" Roxie glared.

The pair had recalled their Pokemon at that point, and the referee decreed them unable to battle as they lay twitching in the fumes.

Round Two was done. That was all it took to get us into the top 8. I'm feeling good about my prospects.

Round 3 was different. It was the first time each member could use a different Pokemon. It was also on the next day. All sorts of big changes. The format of the tournament was structured with the expectation that you have two Pokemon minimum and that you had a day of rest per all trainers' Pokemon's worth of energy per tournament match.

Now that I was out of the less dangerous rounds, it was all Kyou and Gargantua's game. That day of rest I promised from the extra 2v1 matches and training was yesterday, and now it was their time to shine.

Once again, we were on a standard battlefield. No gimmick, just us against the two prey across the dirt.

The countdown ended. We released our Pokemon.

Roxie's Grimer made a reprise. I opened with Kyou, a Heracross feeling like a strong option against most common types found in Unova. Today's meal consisted of a blue-haired man with both blue sunglasses and a goatee dressed in just swimsuit trunks and a regular woman.

With a flourish, the blond man prepared a spectacular wind up before throwing his pokeball in a dramatic underhand toss. His bedazzled dive ball arced brilliantly, exploding in a watery effect before smoothly gliding back into the man's hand.

From the illusion of a fountain sprang a Vaporeon. It leaped into the arena, proudly flaunting itself to the small crowd at the match. To its credit, it did get a few rounds of applause.

The regular woman released her Mimikyu. Yeah, I don't want to mess with that.

"I'll do the strategy this time," Roxie cut in. "Follow my lead, focus on the Vaporeon." Her voice raised, "Grimer! Charge the Vaporeon and Poison Jab!"

"Flank and wait for a chance to punish, Kyou!"

Our Pokemon charged forward, aggressively pushing at the enemy. Kyou was noticeably quicker, but due to his roundabout approach, the pair arrived at nearly the same time.

"Vaporeon!" The blond man declared, posture shifting to a stern stance with his arms crossed, "Meet them head-on! Show them the power of Aqua Tail."

"Use Night Shade, Mimikyu," the normal woman said.

The Vaporeon charged the sludge-beast head-on, hopping into a frontflip. Midway through the spin, their tail began to spout water, blasting itself forward with a surprising amount of forward momentum.

Grimer braced for the hit, absorbing the damage with surprising grace and a lot of jiggling. The gelatinous tank gripped a limb of filth onto the amphibious abomination and slammed Vaporeon into the ground. The time-honored tradition of beating a fish against a rock served Grimer well, allowing him to charge his limb up with a toxic, purple glow, ignore the chip damage of the weak Night Shade plowing into him, and punch into the side of the grounded Pokemon.

Vaporeon got slugged with enough force to send it into the air. Kyou finally moved into action, shooting forward into the air on suddenly revealed wings. His arm wound up above his head before coming down in the flash of a Brick Break.

The freefalling fish-dog love child gargled when the strike hit true; Its body twisted into a "V" around the chopping arm. Almost like a slingshot, the rest of the body shot down, propelling it into the ground. With a wet squelch, Vaporeon exploded like a water balloon, its body deconstructing back into water.

A brief moment of silence fell upon the stadium, a few seconds of shock. The moment fell apart as the puddle congealed back into the familiar form of a Vaporeon, though one distinctly too incoherent to battle, and the crowd breathed a sigh of relief.

The swimmer hadn't quite broken out of the shock yet, gaping at the swift penitence we delivered. The referee coughed, waited a moment, and then spoke, "Your Pokemon is unable to battle. Please recall them and send out your next combatant."

That broke the man from his frozen state. "What?" He grasped for mental straws, finding himself short of the needed braincells to comprehend his inadequacy. He recalled his Pokemon, leveling what must have been a severe glare had he not been wearing sunglasses. "Did you see that? How could you do that to my Pokemon!" He turned to his partner, "That was horrible!"

"Yes, I did see that," said the normal woman.

"I'll show you for daring to hurt my darling Pokemon! Go, Croconaw!"

He released his crocodile. It was three feet tall and built like a brick shithouse. It's a little instinctually terrifying. Like it was built to turn your leg into shredded meat.

"Grimer, get to the Mimikyu next!" Roxie initiated again. She had probably spotted the weak Night Shade, taking its inefficacy as a sign of Mimikyu's low strength, and hoped to take it out quickly.

"No you don't! Croconaw, charge and bite!"

"Intercept, Kyou. Keep distance, poke it with horn attacks."

Kyou took advantage of his wings once again to quickly position himself between Grimer and Croconaw. The croc tried to lumber past him, but was pushed back as Kyou took to all fours and began repeatedly charging with a horn attack, rapidly releasing and beating his wings to launch himself backward and then going back in for another horn attack.

"Too scared to get close?" The blond mocked. "That's alright! We don't need to be close to beat you! Croconaw, Water Gun!"

The spray of water caught Kyou as he retreated after an attack, forcing him backwards. It was his first blow of the match, and a negligible one.

Meanwhile, Grimer had managed to land a Sludge on Mimikyu, damaging its clothy flesh. The Mimikyu wasn't particularly strong, but it was surprisingly quick. It was both dodging and countering attacks with Shadow Sneak and occasionally throwing in a Faint Attack. It was a close fight on both fronts, neither party looking to break from their combat and risk being attacked from behind.

"Approach with Aerial Ace, follow with Brick Break!" I instructed Kyou as he recovered. He shot into the air again and in a flash reappeared, ramming into Croconaw. The crocodile was knocked back, and Kyou quickly moved in with a raised arm to capitalize on the moment.

"Croconaw, catch it with Bite!"

With surprising agility, the reptile twisted itself to intercept the strike. Kyou's arm slammed down into Croconaw's jaw, sending a shock of force through the Pokemon, but the crocodile's jaw snapped down on the bug's arm regardless.

Kyou shrieked. It was nowhere near human, but it was certainly a sound of pain. I'd imagine a Croconaw's bite would do that. The dark-type energy of the bite attack was negligible, but the strength of a crocodile's jaw was disturbing. There was a reason crocodiles were older than the dinosaurs.

"Kyou! Night Slash to get him off!"

The Heracross cried in rage and drew back his free arm, filling it with as much vile energy as he could muster. With a vicious stab, he swung into the living bear trap's stomach.

The crocodile gagged before seizing up even harder. Kyou made a noise somewhere between a growl and a scream as the teeth clamped with renewed force, sharp teeth digging through his exoskeleton.

"Again!" I ordered.

Kyou dutifully prepared another Night Slash, doing his best to shrug off the pain. The crocodile didn't seem like it would let up any time soon, so he took his time and wound the attack up with an unreasonable amount of foreswing. Like a hammer of god, his next Night Slash rammed into Croconaw's stomach, the full-force blow sending it flying away from Kyou. It heaved as it was launched, unable to stand the trauma.

"Mimikyu is unable to battle!" the referee announced.

I glanced back at Roxie's fight and found that to be true. Grimer looked worse for wear, oddly melty and decomposed compared to its usual form. Despite that, it had managed to slam itself onto Mimikyu, crushing and suffocating the Pokemon.

The regular woman recalled her Mimikyu and sent out a Ditto. "Transform into Heracross," she said.

The living gummy candy animorphed into the beetle Pokemon, keeping its disturbingly simple smiley face regardless of its form. I don't enjoy seeing a play-doh smile on an otherwise normal, three-dimensional Pokemon. Go back to stop-motion claymation hell, you monster.

"Roxie, switch opponents!" I spoke up, "Kyou, Aerial Ace on your imposter!"

My Heracross didn't hesitate, flashing into attack as quickly as he heard the command. The ditto braced for impact, its full health allowing it to soak the hit.

Roxie had ordered her Grimer to Sludge at Croconaw, her opponent also participating in ranged combat by firing Water Guns.

"Aerial Ace," said the normal woman.

The false Heracross copied the attack. Kyou tried to block, but his maimed arm and already tired body didn't allow him the fortitude to survive the hyper-effective flying attack. I quickly recalled him, sending out my Dwebble counter-play.

"Iron Defense," I smiled.

Gargantua immediately hid in his shell and began channeling defensive energy. He was a menace with increased defense, shrugging off unreasonable amounts of physical damage. It was one of the few ways he could deal with Kyou in their spars, by becoming defensive enough to simply survive.

It was easier said than done, though. Heracross were absurdly powerful, I learned. Heracross were naturally able to lift absurd amounts of weight for their mass. A veteran Heracross was an incredible force to be reckoned with: fully trained and developed they could gain absurd power.

"Brick Break!" said the normal woman.

Had Ditto been more used to the body of Heracross, it might have been able to make it in time but instead of flying, it chose to sprint. The Brick Break came out after Gar successfully empowered himself, and it was noticeably slower compared to Kyou's lightning-fast chops.

That all to mean that Gar's shell took the hit with minimal issue, barely chipping his rock. Popping from inside his shell, he scurried under his opponent's legs. It was one of his usual strategies when facing Kyou, to tank a hit with his shell, scurry under and behind, and then blast him. It was a risky option on a prepared opponent, but it was a strong option here.

"Rock Slide!"

It was more than effective on the unprepared Ditto, Gar's energy forcing rocks to rise from the ground and crash into Heracross' back. It was a really good matchup in my favor. Gar and Kyou often attempted to metaphorically castrate each other when given the opportunity during training, and so my scrappy Dwebble was fully prepared to take on a less skillful variant of his preferred punching bag.

"Chase!" I told my Dwebble. He maliciously cackled and scrambled after the displaced beetle. "And Slash!" His weird-ass pointed limb gleamed with a violent energy, swiftly swiping at Ditto before the dazed foe regained cognizance.

"Brick Break, again. Keep attacking," said the normal woman.

Her Ditto took the blow but managed to right itself quickly enough to smack Gargantua back with a quick brick break. Gargantua flew like a punted infant, forcing the Ditto to chase after him to keep attacking.

As our enemy advanced, I waited for the opportune moment. It was risky to let her get so close, but I don't think she can handle a defensive play. This was an outlet I was willing to test a fork in. I sat as danger crept closer and closer. I did nothing up until the moment the transformed Heracross reached Gargantua.

"Now! Protect!"

Gargantua enveloped himself in his protective shield, shrugging off the Brick Breaks as if they were water drops on an umbrella.

"Rock Blast!" I ordered once I saw the Ditto's attacks slowing down, the exhaustion of the battle getting under its skin. Gargantua waited till a moment between attacks before dropping the Protect, then blasted a rapid-fire assault of rocks directly into its chest.

Forced back by the pummeling, the Heracross ceased attacking. It moaned, piteously. Gar wasn't really in the state to move too much, either. Maintaining the Protect that long was extremely taxing, even for a defensive tank like him. That didn't mean he wasn't in a state to win this, though.

"Rock Slide! Crush it!"

The bug's wicked smile lit up again, grinning as fiercely as I was. With a great effort, he forced his front limbs into the ground, the tips even alighting with rock-type energy, and then he heaved a sheet of stone larger than I was from the ground and dropped his metaphorical boot heel on the bug.

"Oh, no! Ditto!?" asked the normal woman.

"Croconaw! No!" despaired the blond swimmer, aggressively stroking his facial hair for comfort. His interjection led me to discover his killer croc was getting drowned in the sewage version of 'The Blob' now that they had moved into melee, his defeat now inevitable.

Grimer was one of those Pokemon that don't seem very powerful inherently, but once you translate it over into reality, it's really broken. Grimer wasn't a water type, but he had the physics of one. His whole slimy makeup was a very similar state of matter to water. Shoot some water at it? It'll just reconstitute it. Fire? Sure, you'll singe it, but for battling's sake, being slightly more burnt sludge doesn't reduce your lethality much.

Electricity was more directly effective, though it couldn't really paralyze effectively due to the whole lack of nerves thing that came with being living shit water. Grass-type attacks were still a joke, the Poison-type resistance coming into play and overwhelming any benefits grass attacks would possibly have.

Gar had to pick up the stone slab he used to squash his opponent to allow her to recall her very flat Ditto, the rock functioning as a press to warp the goop. After one last mocking laugh from Gar, the Ditto found peace in a Pokeball.

This freed him up to fight the last Pokemon in the arena, the already struggling Croconaw.

"Smack it in the head with a Rock Blast!" I told my Dwebble, "Don't bother to move; just knock it out from there."

My jeering pocket monster joined in on the pummeling, taking care to only shoot the rocks at the exposed crocodile. Once Grimer realized the plan, he shifted the croc in his grip to look directly at Gargantua. He took great pleasure in pelting Croconaw's face.

With a mournful cry, the man gave up and recalled his Pokemon. He fixed us with a smoldering glare and declared that we ill-mannered ruffians would face a comeuppance at some point or something to that effect.

I raised my hand up to the side, and Roxie's palm met it in a crisp high-five.