"That was a lot of fun! Let's fight again, captain Charlotte!"

Charlotte smiled, exhausted but also happy. For those two months she came to visit the Black Bulls on a regular basis, she came to know a lot about her little brother… Especially about his particular passion to fight and to win. He really seemed to love it and so, Charlotte decided she grant him a duel most of the time she came.

The Black Bulls had been a bit surprised that the captain of the Blue Roses visited often over the last two months. But none of them was against it, even though each show it in their own way.

Finral and Gordon were actually very happy to see her, given how much they supported her with her feelings for Yami. Gordon even had added a doll looking like her in his collection. As creepy those dolls looked, the gesture was actually touching.

Nacht Faust wasn't there often, but the two times Charlotte saw the vice-captain of the Black Bulls, he was more or less welcoming her and asking why she started to hang out with an idiot like Yami. Since she was aware that Nacht didn't hate really Yami, she just shrugged.

Charlotte bonded with Henry a lot. She related to him so much given his curse and she followed his progress with support and interest. Grey was also one she liked to spend time with. She came to help that poor girl with her shyness and sometimes invited her to the Blue Rose squad to meet Puli, after she learned about her still hidden crush for Gauche Adlai.

Speaking of Gauche, his worshipping attitude towards his little sister irritated her at first, but she quickly came to learn more about him, realizing that there was more to him and behind his grumpy attitude, he was really caring for his fellow Black Bulls… especially Grey.

The very first question Charmy Pappitson asked her was about her favourite foods and the answer was enough for the little chef to welcome Charlotte with open arms and to spoil her with meals every visit. One day, Charlotte revealed to her that her favourite kind of breakfast was simply a cup of rose tea with a drop of milk and now sugar, a honey croissant and a soft boiled egg with herbal salt. Charmy took it at heart and every time Charlotte came in the morning, the first thing she got entering the Black Bulls Hideout was this specific breakfast.

Asta and Magna somehow didn't forgot her confession from Spade and how they interpreted, so they were always really happy to see that she wanted to become even better friends with their captain. Charlotte thought that maybe one day, she needed to tell them the truth but given how she still was struggling to confess to Yami, that won't be for soon.

Zora and Nero weren't the most excited about the new regular visitor she was, but definitely not against. With them, Charlotte could just sit down and talk. Zora even mentioned once that she was one of the rare people he could have a serious adult talk in this hideout, so Charlotte took it as a compliment. After a while, she realized that Zora was talking a lot about Nebra Silva, not every time but often enough to be worth mentioning. Mostly to complain, but his complaints sounded more like her complaints towards Yami than real ones. Sometimes, Charlotte if wondered there was something going on between those two and if lady Nebra might be in a similar situation like herself…

Speaking of Silvas, Noelle try to act all royalty, but she was very welcoming and kind in her own special way. She complained a lot about the stupidity of most of her squadmates, which was funny to listen too, especially Asta. Honestly, it was very obvious that Noelle was in love with him, but it seems that she wasn't ready to admit it. Given how long it took Charlotte before to accept her feelings and even longer to admit it to her squad, she understood the young princess more than anyone. Even more so that Asta seemed to be just as dense as Yami, although kinder.

At first, Charlotte had somehow feared to interact with Vanessa Enoteca, due to her stupid jealousy. But to her surprise, the witch didn't seemed to mind at all. On the contrary, she was the most welcoming out of the Bulls. Charlotte finally convinced herself that Vanessa wasn't at all a rival for Yamis heart, she just had a flirty attitude. And it seemed she had a secret admirer. At least, according to the other Black Bulls. Vanessa apparently got a very detailed sewing box from that person, covered with expensive printed linen and she loved using it, Charlotte saw her with that box almost every visit, looking extremely delighted every time she looked at it.

Charlotte wondered who that mysterious secret admirer might be…

But honestly, the Black Bull she was the most interested in besides Yami was of course Luck Voltia, her younger brother.

Today was the day. Today, she finally got a strong enough grip on herself to finally tell him about their familiar bond. She was still very nervous about it, though. Almost as much as her feelings for Yami.

Speaking of him, Charlotte honestly would have preferred that he would be here as well for the revelation, but today he went away, apparently for squad matters with the Purple Orcas. This was weird coming from Yami and Charlotte wondered what the real deal was. Maybe she would ask him later.

On the other hand, maybe it was also a good thing that she would tell Luck the truth alone.

"So, can we fight again? Can we fight?"

"Um, not yet, Luck. First there is… something I need to tell you."

"Is it about fighting?"

"No it's not," Charlotte replied, mildly irritated but mostly amused. Wasn't that a normal feeling to have with younger siblings? She actually liked that feeling.

But it didn't change that telling the truth was still a difficult task.

Luck just looked at her, smiling and excited. It was what he usually looked like, which was a bit concerning. Charlotte wondered how Grace raised him as a single mother, after lord Fidel Roselei chased her away in arrogant selfishness.

"Luck… when you were a little boy, did your mother ever told you anything about who your father was?"

Okay, this wasn't really direct, but Charlotte didn't want to blurt it out just like that either.

"Hm, don't know. She just said that he was a scumbag and that she hated nobles because of him. She was really happy when I beat up a noble and said that I should continue to fight and win. Don't know who my dad was and well, mom also said that we don't need him."

"Did you ever wondered who he was?"

"Sometimes, maybe? Many other kids had dads, after all. But we were happy with just mom and me, so it wasn't really a problem. He surely was mean to mom, given the rare times she talked about him."

"Oh, he was surely more than mean to your mother."

"Yep. How did you find this out?"

"Luck… It might shock you, I honestly have no idea how we both will deal with this, but you deserve to know. Your father… is also my father."

There was a sudden silence, which made Charlotte really nervous. Until…

"But isn't your dad married to your mom?"

Charlotte couldn't help but chuckle. "He is, but that didn't stop him to… well, let me start from the beginning."

So, Charlotte told Luck everything she knew. Her father's affair with his mother, how he chased her away, Charlottes own guilt for what he did and her compassion, how Yami helped her with this investigation… She didn't leave anything out.

It really felt so good to finally let go of that secret to the person who deserved to know it the most. If only she could find the courage to tell Yami that she loved him since a decade.

Luck just looked at her, even after she ended blurting out everything. He looked thoughtful, at least, in his very unique kind of way. Even though she was nervous about his reaction, she couldn't ignore again the similarities in their traits. Jonathan had been right. Both have the eye colour from their father and the same shade of blonde… Charlotte also observed that her and Luck always rubbed their nose slightly when they had no idea what to say. Or that they preferred to eat any kinds of dessert creams with a soup spoon.

"So… those that mean that you're my big sister?"

Really? With everything she told him, that was the first thing he concluded? It surprised Charlotte but it also made her happy as she saw how excited and happy Luck looked at that perspective.

As if she still needed some confirmation, her little brother jumped in her arms, holding her with both arms and legs, like a little monkey.

"That's so cool! I have another sister! Vanessa, Noelle, Charmy, Grey and Nero are already like my sisters, but now I have another one! One for me alone! And she is so strong and can fight me, that's so cool! Best big sister ever!"

Charlotte blushed at his excitement, but also laughed in relief. She was really happy that Luck reacted that way. For a while, she had feared he would be angry, especially at their father.

She had been wrong to fear that, Luck seemed more happy to call her his big sister than angry at their father.

"How long did you know that we're siblings?"

"Since two months. I'm sorry I didn't told you anything before, I was nervous. What my father and by that, my house did to your mother, I thought you might be angry about it. And the Black Bulls are already like your family, I was afraid the revelation would somehow take you away from them and I refused to do something like this. But you also deserved the truth, so… I wanted to visit and get to know you better before that."

"But you're not taking me away, obviously. I gained a new sister, who is strong and can fight with me! What can be cooler than that?"

Luck hugged her again and Charlotte couldn't help but hug him back. It was so relieving and more than nice to be a sister. She might still had no idea what they should do next with this knowledge, but she refused to miss the happiness to have a little brother.

"Shall I beat up our dad? He not only hurt my mom, but also you in a way."

"What? Um, as much as I wouldn't be against it, I don't think it will be a good idea."

"Okay. Even for your mom? She was hurt by him as well."

"She never had any idea that my father cheated on her, so I don't know if she was hurt. If anything, we shouldn't tell her yet or my father. This won't be happy news for them."

Not to mention that since two months, Charlotte didn't talked much anymore with her mother, just some small talk and never when they were alone. She didn't even tried to avoid her mother, it was more like the other way around.

But lady Orchidea didn't seem upset at her daughter for her outburst. Every time she looked at Charlotte, her eyes were more… sad and guilty.

Charlotte had no idea what this could mean.

"But we can tell the Black Bulls and also the Blue Roses if you want, Luck."

"Yeah! I wanna show off my big sister, especially to Magna! Oh, speaking of Magna… Can I tell you a secret?"

"Sure."

"Don't tell him, but he is the best one to fight with for me and even though he's fun to make fun of, I don't like when his sad or left behind. Me fighting with him is actually a way to cheer him up. But don't tell him, Magna is also very stupid and proud, he doesn't like admit he needs to be cheered up from time to time."

"I won't tell anything. Um… since you shared a secret, I might as well share mine. It is a bit difficult to say, but I dwelt on it for way too long. Just promise me to not blurt it out to anyone yet."

"Promised!"

"I'm… I'm in love with your captain. I loved him for ten years now and I'm still hopelessly in love with Yami."

There it was. For the second time in her life, she blurted her biggest secret out and it still wasn't to the person who was the most concerned. Wasn't she a bit a lost cause for romance?

Luck didn't say anything at first, before he actually exclaimed, "I knew that Magna was wrong!"

"Huh?"

"He believed that what you said to captain Yami in Spade was because you wanted to be friends with him and this was also way you visited more often. But I told you that Magna is an idiot, so I was certain he was wrong. I just had no idea what it could be, though. I was never in love, so I never thought about that. But that's cool too, my big sister and my captain together!"

"Yeah, about that… I never got the courage to tell him…"

"That's okay. Noelle never admitted she's in love with Asta either and she even refused to admit it to herself. But wait… ten years and captain never realized you're in love with him, despite all his Ki reading?"

"Well… yes."

"Captain's dumb. Shall I fight him to make him realize?"

"I don't think that'll be the solution. But if you want to help me, Gordon, Finral and the whole Blue Rose squad are on board to help me with him. Do you want to join?"

"Hell yeah!"

As the two siblings walked back to the Black Bulls hideout, Charlotte couldn't help but feel like part of her burden had finally been taken from her. Not the whole package, but it felt already so much lighter.

Maybe one day she would be able to finally find the courage to finally properly confess to Yami.

Vanessa really hoped that Acier Silva cheated on her husband with a

brother or a cousin of him and got her four children with her lover instead. Because there was no way that this jerk could be the father of Nozel and Noelle. Heck, even Nebra and Solid deserved better!

Thank goodness she listened to her instincts and actually didn't really left after Nozel told her that it was okay. Because it clearly wasn't okay. She was so horribly worried for Nozel, knowing he was alone with this horrible man was so sickening she just couldn't leave. Hiding behind a tree nearby, she heard everything…

Vanessa had no words to described how she felt listening to this talk between Nozel and his father. That man always seemed so confident in such a sickening way. Even when Nozel made out pretty good points and did a really good job to defend himself in her books, his father didn't seemed impress. As if he was talking to a weak, rebellious child and not a full grown adult, a captain of a royal squad, a head of one of the three royal houses.

As she tighten the grip she had on her broom stick while she followed Nozel, Vanessa tried to sort the things out from the talk between father and son.

The detail of an arranged marriage hurt, probably more than it should. She realized her love for Nozel since two months and this was one of the rare times she actually regretted to not acted upon it already. All the royal duties and complication were kinda frightening, so she had been afraid to be a burden for Nozel if she confessed her love to him. Or worse, if he would stop spending time with her. Their meetings, almost dates maybe, meant so much to her, she grow afraid to lose them.

The shadow of an arranged marriage always lingered, but Vanessa had ignore it. After all, Nozel obviously wasn't seriously looking for a spouse. But when that jerk of a father mentioned it, it felt suddenly very more real and horrible. Nozel only considered an arranged marriage because he wanted his siblings to be free from it. His father was the opposite, ready to sacrifice his children into a loveless marriage, just for his goal.

Vanessa had no idea what that goal could be, but she knew that Nozel, Noelle, Nebra and Solid would suffer if it becomes a reality.

She also couldn't help but wonder if that man had a particular hatred towards Nozel specifically. That speech how he should have been an only child if it weren't for his magic affinity, calling Nozel a mama's boy and stupid, that deal…

It gave Vanessa some relief that Nozel didn't gave in to his father's threats and even more that he took her defence so fiercely. But when he left, he still looked so terribly defeated. That sight broke her heart, she had no other choice than to follow him.

He looked so lonely, so guilty even though it wasn't his fault… His cold mask gained more and more cracks the more she knew him and now, it was barely being hold together. The mask might fall apart, but Nozel looked so broken as well. Alone and broken… And there was a mention of Nozel being cursed and Vanessa didn't know if it was just metaphorical. Or worse, real.

He needed someone to hold him back together, to not let him alone, to be there for him… And Vanessa wanted to be this person. Loving him made her care for him with the same strength she cared about every Black Bull, to a point she started to believe that Rouge would work on him as well.

Vanessa wanted to be here for Nozel. And she would be.

It wasn't long until Nozel reached the Silva palace, Vanessa pretty close behind him. He hadn't noticed her presence yet, probably torturing himself with thoughts about his horrible father.

Vanessa thought that Nozel would have landed in the plaza shared by all three palaces and then went to his own. It would have been difficult to make her presence acknowledged – she still hadn't thought that part through. But Nozel didn't stop. His mercury eagle flew towards the Silva palace, passing by towers and wings, passing over some small courtyards and a flower garden, until he stopped right over a balcony.

The eagle disappeared as Nozel landed on a balcony, searching something in his pocket before opening a french window. Was this the balcony to his bedroom? Seemed like Noelle wasn't the only one to enter her bedroom by the window, especially when she was feeling down, Nozel did it as well. Was this maybe a Silva thing? Or was it just something Noelle and Nozel shared as siblings?

Nozel closed behind him and Vanessa decided to land as well. It was near sunset, but the sun was still shining brightly on the white walls of the palace, giving a slight golden touch.

Normally, Vanessa would have find it really beautiful, but she wasn't here for that. Nozel was important right now, more important than anything else.

Looking through the window, what she saw first was white and big room. And mostly… an almost empty room. Just a bed, a desk with a chair, two bookshelves, a single armchair at another window… that was it.

She would have expected more furniture in a royal bedroom, but this… this was so bare. It kinda reminded her of her cage, back in the Forest.

Gosh, how lonely had Nozel been and for how long?

Speaking of the eagle, Nozel was sitting on the floor, the back to his bed, kneels pulled to his chest, arms around his leg, his face hidden.

Vanessas heart broke again at this sight. He looked so different from the stern captain of the Silver Eagles, from the man she came to know and love since their talk in Spade.

Now he looked, somehow more fragile and younger.

Like a fourteen year old boy who just lost his mother…

Vanessa fought back her tears and getting all her courage together, knocked against the glass.

The sound made Nozel terribly flinch and as he looked up, his eyes were a mix of shock, relief, sadness, disbelief and guilt. No cold mask. Didn't he wear it when he was alone in his bedroom?

Nozel seemed frozen, just looking at her. For a moment, Vanessa feared she might have overstepped something by coming here, even though she wanted to be here for him, to comfort him.

But then, Nozel quickly got up, walked towards the french window and opening it, even stepping aside to let her in like a gentleman. Vanessa didn't asked twice as she came in, leaving her broom and her shopping bags on Nozels bedroom floor.

It should felt so random or awkward, coming into his room like that, with her bags, through the balcony, as if they were secret lovers in a dark romance novel. But despite the unusual situation, it just felt… right.

"What are you doing here?"

His voice was full of disbelief, but Nozel didn't seem upset or angry. Just trying to understand and sad and exhausted.

"I… wanted to see you. I was worried you're not fine."

Vanessa hated how hesitant she sounded. She was so certain of what she wanted, which was to look after him. But acting upon it with Nozel was somehow a bit more easier said than done. And she didn't have any plan.

"I'm-"

"And don't tell me you're fine, because we both know that you're not."

Nozel closed his mouth again, already giving up to argue. Vanessa took a closer look at him. She would have expected him to have cried, to have tears in his eyes or at least wet cheeks. But there was nothing. His eyes were watery, but there weren't any tears. Was he trying to hold them back`

"Nozel, you shouldn't hold back your tears. It's more difficult to hold them back than to let them flow, trust me."

Nozel just shook his head, not looking at her. Gosh, just as stubborn as Noelle, was this a family thing?

"Please, it's not good to hold them back, trust me. It's not a weakness… I won't judge you for crying, if it's that what you fear."

This time, he looked at her, clearly surprised by her words. Was he really afraid she would somehow think less of him if he cried? Who was the idiot who told him that sadness was a weakness?

At least, he didn't hold his tears back anymore, letting them flow on his cheeks. He didn't cry, those were silent tears.

Vanessa took a deep breath. He was surely still wondering what she was doing here and she owed him the truth.

"Nozel, I… When you told me it was alright to leave, I was still so worried about you. So, I didn't really flew away. I was hiding nearby and… I heard everything your father said to you."

Nozel looked away again and Vanessa feared for a moment that she had chosen the wrong words to tell him this.

"You must think I'm pathetic."

"What? No, of course not! On the contrary, I even think you managed well. You did your best to defend yourself and to fight his arguments, you didn't even gave in to his deal. Seriously, it should be forbidden to even try such underhanded deals instead of helping the Magic Knights with their investigations, Asta would be so angry about it. And… I loved how you took my defence. It really means a lot to me. So, why would I even consider you pathetic?"

"You saw him, right? He wasn't impressed by anything I've said. Nothing of it counts for him. In his eyes, I'm probably nothing better than a rebellious teenager who will come to reason eventually."

"But you're not, you're a grown adult and he should realize that."

"You don't know him, Vanessa. My father is a master in manipulation. He is very well-loved within nobility and royalty. His words are like guidelines to follow, the king listen to his councils, nobles consider him a perfect royal, despite the fact that he only married into royalty and that he is a widow today. He wasn't there for my mother's funeral and made everyone believing that it was because of the time he needed to travel back to Clover. He often has diplomatic missions and enjoys to manipulate foreign countries so much he's away sometimes for years. When he came back, there was a party for his welcome and everyone was so joyful, no one would have thought he should be grieving at least a bit for his wife. I tried to make him understand this, but… I've already made a few mistakes since I became Head of House not so long ago and he… My father made it worse by subtly showing how incompetent I was already and he used it to give a better image of himself. It worked, king Augustus and lord Achilles Vermillion never forget to put shade on the Silvas and practically worshipping my father. He plays everyone like fiddle and he doesn't even need to lie for that. No, he uses the truth and he even managed to make it sound in a way that arranges him."

"But you aren't blinded by him like the rest of the nobles. He can't manipulate you because you see through his game. He only sees the truth he wants and can't see who you really are. You are strong," Vanessa protested. Hopefully, Nozel could see and understand this. It was already kinda scary that someone didn't use lies but the truth to play others like a fiddle.

"I might be Head of House and I have the reputation of a perfect royal. And yes, I know I have authority over my squad. But that's all. It doesn't look like it, but my word doesn't count for much within noble circles. I've already made many mistakes in their eyes and… a lot of them are even true, like the whole situation with Noelle. They might have different reasons to believe it, but it is still true. I was only fifteen when I took over the house after my mother died and I was grieving, but I should have been stronger from the start. I don't deserve-"

"Stop it right there," Vanessa said softly but firmly. She already knew were this would lead. Gosh, she already suspected Nozel had serious guilt issues and she wasn't even surprised that they run so deep. Also, he was probably alone for so long, his room was already screaming loneliness. He never got help, that was sure. Maybe he wouldn't have accepted help as well?

"I know you made mistakes, especially with Noelle and I wouldn't lie that I resented you at first. But I didn't know you back then. Today, Noelle has forgiven you and I forgiven you. I came to know you pretty well during those last months, Nozel. The real you. I think that I understand you better today. You have a good heart and probably you have it for a long time already. The fact alone that you only considered an arranged marriage so that your siblings could choose who they want already proves it. Also, you told me that you not only send Noelle to the Black Bulls because we didn't had any dangerous missions back then, but also because we wouldn't care about her bad reputation. Despite how it looked like and despite how you handled it, your intentions were mostly to keep your sister save."

Nozel looked like he wanted to protest, but Vanessa didn't let him. He needed to listen to this, he needed to hear another image he gave than the ones nobles knew and criticized.

"Don't you dare think that you doesn't deserve any kindness or happiness. I certain that you are a victim too and your pain matters as well. You went through a lot and even worse, you were alone, with no one there to help."

"It wasn't like I accepted any help. My father would have never, the other two royal heads would have never. A head of house was always supposed to be perfect from the start and I wasn't."

"Yeah, I guessed that much. You just lost your mother, Nozel, you were still grieving. They should be ashamed to not let you grieve properly. As for a perfect Head of House… They were already adults when they took over the Kiras and the Vermillions, I bet."

"That's true… Actually, my Vermillion aunt certainly wanted to help me. She was a Silva married into the Vermillions, but she never forgot her roots. Aunt Océane probably did tried to reach out, but lord Achilles must have hold her back every time she tried. The head of house Vermillion hates the Silvas to almost unhealthy degrees and it's one of his hobbies to throw shades on it."

"Geez, that sounds messed up."

"It is."

"Well, that's somehow also proves my point. You were a victim too, Nozel, and given the circumstances, you did everything you could. I think it takes a lot of inner strength to deal with everything you had to face. You were just strong alone for way too long. You are a good man despite your mistakes and you try so much to make amends. You… Actually, no one is harsher on you than yourself."

Nozel didn't answered immediately. Tears were still flowing from his eyes, but less than before. When he finally spoke again, his voice was full of guilt and sadness. "How do you make it? Noelle, you…"

"How we make what?"

"Forgiving me. You made it sound so easy, but… I can't. Every time I look in the mirror, I remember what I did and I hate myself. Unable to forgive the man I see in the reflection. I… I can't do this alone."

"You don't need to forgive yourself alone. I will help you. All I want is for you to be happy."

She took his hand and was relieved when he didn't back away. He was so lonely, so sad behind his cold mask and still so caring and goodhearted. It was such a shame that he hadn't been able to show his kind heart for so long.

Since his mother died. Vanessa wondered if deep down, young teenager Nozel was still there and if he never stopped crying since Acier Silva passed away.

Nozel deserved to be happy. And for that, she needed to admit something.

"Nozel… Do you remember when you saw me upset for the first time?"

"How can I forget. You're always so full of joy and optimism, seeing you like this… I'll admit that it pained me."

"I'm sorry for that. I'm also sorry I haven't told you why I was upset."

"It's alright. Some things are difficult to put in words. And you needed comfort first."

"And you still think that you're a horrible man? Come on, it shows how good of a heart you have by being this understanding. But to tell you the truth… I was upset because I overheard three young nobles, real jerks, gossiping about us. And what they said hurt…"

Vanessa finally told him everything what happened that day. Two months ago… She still hasn't forgotten. Probably because she discovered a detail of Nozels world that wasn't beautiful at all. It was even horrible.

She didn't look Nozel in the eyes while she was telling him all that. But the way he firmly hold her hand was proof enough how shocked and upset he was by what he was hearing.

When Vanessa finally stopped, all he could say was, "Why didn't you told me back then?"

"I'm not sure. You… already had such a burden, I didn't want you to have worries because of what some jerks told about us. You were doing better, being happier, I was afraid to destroy that. Also… I was afraid that if you learned you would stop spending time with me, not because you might be ashamed, but more to protect me from the rumours somehow and I didn't want to risk that. The… the time we are spending together… it means so much to me, more than you imagined. I was afraid to lose it… quite stupid, I know."

"It's not stupid."

His hand was now holding hers very tight. As if he was afraid to let her go or that if she would start crying if he would. The other was now touching her cheeks, cleaning some tears away. Vanessa hadn't realized that she had tears in her eyes and that they started flowing on her cheeks.

She looked up, only to see Nozel staring directly at her, tears still flowing down his chiseled face. Why did he still think of himself as someone horrible when he was looking at her with so much compassion and care, with so much kindness?

No wonder actually Vanessa fell in love with Nozel. How could she not love a kind man?

Before both of them realized it, their faces came closer to each other. Slowly but surely, their lips met.

Vanessa had no idea how her first kiss with Nozel would be. She dreamt about it in so often and in such different ways, it became impossible to really know how it would be in reality.

Which didn't matter. This first kiss right here was perfect, so much better than her fleeting dreams and fantasies.

His lips were so incredibly soft, maybe also a bit cold. Not freezing, more like a sunny day in winter, when it was close to the evening. It was also wet and a bit salty due to the tears, but Vanessa didn't care.

Nozel kissed her back very softly, one could say even respectfully. Vanessa smiled against his lips. Some might find respect not exciting in love, but those were probably idiots most of the time. Nozel always had been respectful with her and she didn't wanted him any other way.

But soon, Nozel started to get a bit bolder. He began to kiss her with more passion. His tongue brushed her lips, she opened her mouth, their tongues were now touching…

They both suddenly jumped apart, realizing a bit late what exactly they were doing. Both were breathing heavily. Vanessa tried to focus on what just happened. Okay, she knew exactly what just happened. But this wasn't the point.

The point was how natural it felt, as if it was just meant to be. Never had it been like that before, never did Vanessa stopped thinking when she kissed one of her few previous partners. It had never been really pretty, not always bad, but never did it had this effect on her.

Until Nozel.

And despite the shock, she just couldn't regret it.

But did he regret their kiss?

This was one of the most frightening thoughts Vanessa ever had. She stared at him and almost flinched when she saw Nozel staring back at her. He was shocked and heavily breathing. But there wasn't any regret in his eyes. Something else instead, which Vanessa was a bit afraid to define.

The stared at each other, with the same tension from the last two months. Only that it wasn't as comfortable as usual this time. Something seemed to scream within them. Something that might have screamed for as long as this tension existed, they just didn't heard it. And even know, Vanessa couldn't understand what was screamed.

Or was she afraid to understand?

Well, she still needed to say something before it became too unbearable and before she would give in to her fear and actually fear Nozels bedroom.

"Vanessa, I-"

"What did you mean with you being cursed?"

They both were still staring at each other, it was still a bit uncomfortable, but not as much as before. Vanessa took a deep breath before she asked again, "During the talk with your father, you said you were cursed. What did you mean with that?"

Nozel just looked at her, stunned, before he actually sighed, "It is something I haven't told anyone yet. Not even Noelle. Even Dorothy who knew more isn't well aware of it."

He sat up straight, before slowly removing his typical Silva upper shirt. Then he managed to remove the golden choker and took off his undershirt.

What caught Vanessas eyes first was that despite not being buff, he was still not a bean-pole. Well, she already knew it, but it was nice to have it confirmed. He had well-defined muscles, not immediately eye-catching maybe but still wonderfully fine and hot.

Why did she focused on only buff men before when this existed?

But then, Nozel touched his neck and Vanessa forgot about her slight thirst to focus on a subtle scar he had on his neck. Her eyes widened.

"Nozel… what… How did you this happened to you?"

"You might already heard part of the story. When mother was fighting against Vanica, she had been cursed. Weakening her and killing her slowly. But when mother was cursed… I was affected too. If I ever told anyone about Megiculas involvement in my mother's demise, I would die. Furthermore, if anyone would hear about it, they would be affected by the same curse. It would have spread like a disease. The only I could talk about it was my mother, because of her own curse."

Vanessa had no idea what to say.

"It had let a mark on my neck. That's why I added the golden choker to the Silva attire. My father saw it once. Of course I didn't told him, I couldn't even. But he isn't stupid. My father understood very quickly I had been cursed. And in his eyes… that made me a failure."

"What? But this isn't-"

"Fair? I know. But fairness was never something he considered worth it when it wasn't useful for him. He never tried to ask what happened and never considered it important. His own child had been cursed and still, not important because it wasn't useful for his own goal. While he went on cocktails and soirees, refining his already excellent reputation, I was left at home, watching my mother slowly dying. At first I tried to search for a way to save my mother. But there wasn't and it pained me so much my mother had to ask me to stop. So, for one year, I was unable to do anything but watching my mother weakening and dying. I felt like a failure, so useless-"

"You're not a failure," Vanessa whispered, holding his hands. What he told her just now… it explained so much about him, about how the Silvas are today, about many things concerning Noelle.

Somehow, Nozel had been in a cage. He still was a bit, with how he put his siblings before himself. Because he cared so much about all three of them.

He and she… They were very different personality wise. But in some ways, they were also similar.

Nozel sighed at her sentence, probably feeling too tired to protest. He just continued, "When Megicula was defeated for good, my curse was lifted. But… it didn't made disappear anything I did. I can never forget them."

"Of course none of it ever disappeared. It happened no matter what. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't be free. Nozel, do you really think I would think badly of you after everything you just told me? Think again! Why would I beaten up an already terribly broken man?"

Vanessa hugged him tightly, her chin resting against his shoulder. She wanted to hug all of his pain away, all of his guilt, even though she knew his past would never disappear. But she would do anything to soothe his worries, to help him to forgive himself and finally move on.

Nozel slowly hugged her back. Gosh, wasn't he used to compassion as well?

"Listen well to me, Nozel. You're a victim too. You did everything you could. You deserve now that happy things happen to you."

And I love you.

Vanessa wasn't sure if she could confess already. Nozel was so down already, something like this might scare him away like a bird. Even birds in cage could fly away.

For a while, they just hold each other. She still didn't hear him cry, but given how he was trembling, the tears just didn't stop falling down his cheeks. The same applied to her. Her heart was bleeding for him.

Before she could even think about it, Vanessa slightly turned her head and pressed her lips against his neck. Right were the scar was, right were his curse mark used to be.

She felt Nozel flinched at the gesture and to be honest, she was still a bit surprised about how bold this was, with him and in this situation. But Vanessa didn't care. She just wanted him to comfort him and even though she had no idea still on how to do it so it could help, at least she was trying everything she could.

Didn't Finral said something like this once? When he explained why he wanted to comfort Langris on something?

Don't focus on what you can't do to comfort someone. Focus on what you can give in the moment.

Well, that was probably exactly what she was doing.

After a while, Vanessa felt Nozel finally relaxing a bit, holding her closer and even diving his face in the crook of her neck.

Now she was flinching slightly at the gesture, but didn't let go of her hold. She didn't wanted to think anymore, she refused to question anything right now. Just focusing on Nozel, on his warmth and his presence, on how his heart was beathing and her own. Just at the same rhythm somehow…

Slowly, their lips find their way to each other again. This kiss was even better than the first and felt just as natural.

Ending this kiss just lead to another one. And another one. And another one.

Vanessa ended up losing all notions of time as the kisses got more heated and passionate, really deep. She felt Nozel grabbing her hips firmly, holding her closer to him, and her own arms going around his neck, deepening the current kiss.

Vaguely, she felt falling backwards on the mattress but she couldn't care less. Nozel only felt important to her right now.

Their lips weren't only searching each other now, also trailing on their jaws and cheeks, on their necks and shoulders. But right when Nozel started trailing kisses on her collarbone, he stopped abruptly. Vanessa groaned at the loss of his lips and looked up to him, almost pouting.

The look in Nozels eyes was a mix of fear and determination, of deep tenderness and a thirst he seemed to hold back the best he could.

"Vanessa, if we continue now… I fear I won't be able to stop. I… don't want to if you don't, I respect you too much for-"

Vanessa made him stop by cupping his face and she whispered firmly, "Respect me all you want, but don't you dare stop."

Nozel just looked at her, surprised and relieved, before he went for her lips again, pulling her into a deep kiss and even rolling over so that she was now on top of him.

They forgot the world around them, their different status, losing all notion of time and space, only knowing each other as they slowly get rid of their clothes.

Logically speaking, this embrace maybe happened too fast, too soon, too unorthodox to start a relationship. But Vanessa didn't care right now, as it just felt so right when Nozel gently lied her back on the bed and when they became one soon after.

There was an urgency but neither Vanessa nor Nozel wanted to give in and rush it all. They took it very slow, focusing on each other, caresses just as slow as breezes, the kisses slow and deep, not only taking the pleasure, but also giving it to the other, making sure none of them were neglecting themselves.

Tonight, their souls came together, perfectly matching with each other…