Got a little announcement at the end of this one.
Heart's Desire
And so night returned to Rak'tika as another Lightwarden falls, offering those who worship the dark their first glimpse at the night they so revered and absolving the Viis of at least some of their long duty.
Yet things can never remain simple, especially not with someone like Emet-Selch. Hydaelyn and Zodiark; the first primals in existence. Hard to wrap your head around. If what he says is true.
He's planning something, I can tell. But what...?
A quiet calm hung in the air.
The noises of the local fauna had subsided, turning into nothing but faint whispers carried by the wind as if the beasts too couldn't believe what they were seeing.
Night had returned.
Tearing her sight offered by the stars above, S'eni turned her attention towards the Night's Blessed who had gathered together to pray for the first time ever in the dark of true night.
Tears were streaming down on some of their faces and even Runar, who was holding his sermon, was close to crying once more.
The Blessed were simple and emotional people, but that was also what made them honest. It brought a smile to her face to see their prayers finally answered.
But it didn't last long and was replaced by a frown instead, the words of Emet-Selch echoing in the back of her mind.
"Zodiark and Hydaelyn. Formed of faith and prayer, of conviction and devotion...the eldest and most powerful...of primals."
Was it true? Was Hydaelyn, the Mothercrystal, a primal?
Then...what would that make her? And Minfilia? And others that could hear her voice?
Were they nothing more than tempered thralls like those of other primals? Was that why they were immune to their powers?
But would she be able to feel doubt like she did right now then?
No, there had to be more to what he had revealed, something he purposefully withheld.
Right?
Her worried musings were interrupted when a soft hand came to rest on her upper arm and she turned her head to see Y'shtola watching the Night's Blessed with a calm expression on her face.
"Remember this sight," she said in a low voice. "This here is proof of your importance as the Warrior of Darkness to these people. Without you, they would still be hiding away in these caves to pray that one day the Dark would return."
"Without us, you mean," S'eni replied, earning herself a small smile from her lover.
"You did the most, and you know it." Y'shtola watched on for a moment longer, before looking away with a sigh.
"We can wait until tomorrow to leave, you know?" she offered.
"No." the other Miqo'te shook her head. "The sooner we return to the Crystarium, the better. I fear Eulmore won't let this defeat go unanswered. But before that, can I speak with you in private for a moment?"
S'eni searched her face, then nodded. "Of course."
"Thank you."
Together, they left the Blessed to their prayers and entered Y'shtola's private chambers. As soon as the doors closed, she spoke up once more, "Eni, I—"
But whatever Y'shtola had wished to say came to an abrupt halt, when S'eni embraced her tightly, burying her face in the crook of her neck.
"Don't ever do something so reckless again!" she said. As slammed her eyes shut, the image of Y'shtola's smile as she flung herself down that chasm to throw the antidote back up at her flashed through her mind. "I thought I'd lost you!"
If not for her timely use of Flow, she would be dead now. And even then, it had taken Emet-Selch of all people to fish her out of the Lifestream again.
Y'shtola didn't reply at first, too stunned by her sudden outburst, but her arms soon found their way around S'eni to return the embrace. "Forgive me...It was the only thing I could think of to save them."
She released a shuddering breath when she felt Y'shtola's fingers bury into her hair, cradling her head softly.
Y'shtola was still alive, was still here; with her.
Thank the Twelve.
They remained like this for a while, simply holding each other until, finally, S'eni let go of her again. "Sorry, I just…"
"I know."
Clearing her throat, she took a step back. "A-Anyway, you wanted to talk?"
"Yes." The other woman's expression grew serious. "At first I wanted to keep my suspicions to myself, since I had no proof, but after your victory at Rak'tika Falls I'm afraid they have proven true."
"This is about the Light, isn't it?" she asked
Y'shtola looked at her in surprise. "You know?"
"I heard part of your argument with Urianger. I suppose that explains why you thought I was a Sin Eater."
"Indeed. When you defeated the Lightwarden, the light pouring forth from it wasn't negated by Hydaelyn's blessing, but rather absorbed into your being," Y'shtola explained. She looked S'eni up and down. "Though there aren't signs of immediate corruption, one thing is for certain: with every Lightwarden you slay more and more light will get absorbed and the danger to you grows greater."
"Honestly, I don't feel any different," S'eni said, looking at herself, while wiggling her ears and flicking her tail. Still working as intended.
"That may be so, but we can't be certain what happens in the future. Eni..." her lover stepped forward and placed both hands on her shoulders. "If you feel anything strange, anything at all, you must tell me."
Silvery white eyes came to rest upon hers and she couldn't do anything but stare at the open worry reflected within them.
"I will," she promised.
Exhaling, Y'shtola nodded, raising a hand to cup her cheek for a moment before stepping back again.
"You should go join the others. I will be along shortly, once I have gathered what I need and attended this unsightly collection of books." The other Miqo'te sighed and turned around, firmly placing her hands on her hips. "I'd always complained that her cave was such a mess whenever I stumbled over books or scrolls just strewn about and now look at this. Gods, I really am turning into her..."
Feeling the tense air dissipate, S'eni chuckled. "See you soon, Master Matoya."
Another, much more weary sigh followed as she stepped outside.
She let her eyes come to rest on the gathered Blessed once more and her previous smile returned.
After a moment of simply watching, she began to head towards Slitherbough's entrance, where the others were waiting.
"How are things?" she asked as soon as she reached them.
"We took one last look around the perimeter," Thancred replied. "All things considered, Slitherbough remains relatively unscathed."
"Thanks to the antidote, all those who were poisoned will make a full recovery," Minfilia added.
"That's good to hear." They could finally live their lives in peace then.
"Sorry to keep you all waiting," Y'shtola called out as she joined them as well.
"Well that was fast," S'eni said, looking at her in amusement. Y'shtola shrugged.
"I also had experience in cleaning up a certain someone's mess. Shall we be off, then?"
"Art thou certain this is best?" Urianger asked.
"I won't deny that a part of me wishes I could stay. I lived with the Blessed for two years, learned their culture, and even took on Master Matoya's name as my own. I only hope I did honor to it," Y'shtola said, a sad little smile dancing across her lips, but it quickly vanished as she looked towards S'eni and instead was replaced by one of determination. "But now is not the time for doubt or hesitation. Come, let's return to the Crystarium."
Mirroring her lover's expression, she nodded and their group began to leave.
When they arrived at the Crystarium, she could immediately feel that something was different. It was something subtle, which she couldn't really define, though if the tense behaviour of the guards outside was any indication, it must have to do with the Exarch's absence. In a way, he was the Crystarium, even if he himself would claim otherwise. He guided these people with his wisdom, so naturally his leaving, even if only for a short period of time, would leave those relying on him with a sense of unease.
Despite it, though, the city was still functioning as it ever did, with people going about their daily business and S'eni raised her hand to greet some of the more familiar faces as they headed towards the Exedra.
"I'm hardly surprised Alphinaud and Alisaie have yet to arrive," Y'shtola said, crossing her arms in front of her chest while looking around the area. "But I expected the Crystal Exarch to already wait for us like he always does."
"Still don't trust him, do you?" S'eni asked.
"While he has assisted us greatly and shares the same goal as us, he still surrounds himself with too much secrecy. For example, his motives still elude me."
"I understand. He is a mysterious fellow, but to sate your curiosity: shortly before we left for Rak'tika, he received an invitation from Vauthry. So he might still be on his way back from Kholusia."
"The leader of Eulmore?" Y'shtola frowned. "If he was there while their troops attacked Rak'tika..."
"Everyone! It's good to see you!" the other Miqo'te's musings were interrupted by Alphinaud's voice and they turned around to see their friend walking towards them, the Exarch by his side. Her eyes narrowed slightly when she noticed the latter leaning on his staff.
"Alphinaud, it's been too long," Y'shtola greeted him, then gave the Exarch a polite, if curt, nod.
"I assume that you're here means you've brought word of the Warden in Rak'tika?" the young Elzen asked.
"Found and slain," S'eni told him, placing a hand on the back of her hip. "This one was a little trickier to find though."
He chuckled. "As expected."
"With Eulmore sending out their troops into all corners of Norvrandt to protect them, I'm glad to see that their efforts were wasted on the Greatwoods," the Exarch said.
"Believe me, it wasn't for lack of trying," she muttered, taking a quick glance at her lover. "And I feel they'll be trying all the more to stop us from getting to the next two."
"Speaking of Eulmore, how did the meeting with Vauthry go?" Thancred asked.
"Yes, about that. It proved—urgh!" He stumbled forward, hand going to his head, and the only thing keeping him on his feet being his staff.
"Exarch!" Alphinaud was immediately at his side, steadying him. "You mustn't push yourself. Your time away from the tower clearly has taken its toll on you."
"Yes, it seems so…" the Exarch nodded.
"You all must be tired from your journey as well," Alphinaud said. "Why don't we all take a much needed rest and resume this at a later time?"
"I was about to suggest the same." Y'shtola gave S'eni a pointed look. "After our clash with the Lightwarden, you deserve to recuperate."
"It's settled then! We will reconvene in the morning." After a quick goodbye, their young friend began to help the Crystal Exarch back into the tower.
"Guess I'm not getting a choice in the matter?" she asked the other Miqo'te while the others too began to leave.
"No, I'm afraid not," Y'shtola replied with an amused smile. "Hmm. I suppose I shall see if my room is still around."
S'eni watched her lover leave for a moment, before shrugging and releasing a sigh.
With no other option, she made her way to the Pendants and into her room. As soon as she had closed the doors behind her, she looked at herself once again, a frown forming on her face as she walked into the middle of the room.
Ardbert's familiar presence appeared next to her. "So there's Light sealed inside you, huh?" he asked, tilting his head to the side. "You certainly wouldn't know just from the outside. You look the same as ever to me."
"Hopefully it'll stay that way," she replied, looking away from her hands and towards him. "I can hardly stop now that I've started, can I?"
"True. Packing up and going home isn't really an option anymore. If you don't face the music here, it'll only come and find you there." Crossing his arms, he locked eyes with her. "Have faith in your friends. Look out for them, and hope they'll look out for you. What else can you do?"
"Yeah, you're right." she sat down on the small set of stairs.
A moment of silence passed before Ardbert spoke up once more. "Think he was telling the truth? Emet I mean. All that nonsense about Hydaelyn being no different from any other primal…"
"I honestly don't know," S'eni admitted, her gaze dropping to the ground.
"Aah—let's pay him no mind. Lies are the Ascians' stock-in-trade." he moved over to sit down next to her, looking out of the open window. "Villains, heroes, they would make you believe it's all a matter of perspective. Me? I'm no saint or saviour, just another sinner. And I know damn well I'm in no position to judge...But when I saw the people of Slitherbough look up at the sky and celebrate the return of the dark, it felt good. It was moments like that that I cherished. The calm after the storm."
He looked at her, and smiled. "I always took comfort in that."
She mirrored his expression.
"Say, that woman, uh, Master Matoya? Y'shtola? I've noticed that you two seem rather close," Ardbert then said.
"Well, we're together. That's probably the reason."
"Really?" S'eni nodded and he blinked once. "Huh..."
"Is that so surprising?" she asked.
"Oh, no no. It just wasn't exactly the first thing that came to mind when thinking about you."
She supposed that made sense. She certainly wasn't wondering what his exploits in the matters of love were when he appeared in her room.
But... Her smile grew. "What about you then? One girl in every port?"
For a second, he looked downright shocked at the notion, eliciting a laugh from her. "What!? No! I—"
"Relax. I'm just pulling your leg. But really, anyone special you had back then?"
Ardbert grumbled a little and crossed his arms again. "No," he admitted. "At least nothing serious. I guess I was just too focused on the adventure to give it much thought. What companionship I needed, I got from my friends."
"Oh, so no secret romance with one of your friends?"
"Lamitt and Renda-Rae?" his eyebrows rose and he shook his head. "No. We were friends, nothing more."
"Hmm, I see. Though I wonder if they thought so too."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
S'eni shook her head, fighting a grin from forming. "Nevermind."
He sighed. "Sometimes, I really don't get you."
Her lips parted to retort but a knock on the doors made her look over to them instead. "Yes?"
"It's me," the unmistakable voice of Y'shtola called from the other side.
Turning back to her ghostly companion, she found nothing but air where he had sat just a second ago. A little huff escaped her before she called back, "Come in!"
The doors opened and Y'shtola stepped inside, pale eyes immediately finding her. "Are the chairs not to your liking?" she asked, the corners of her lips quirking upward.
"I thought I might change things up a little," S'eni replied while rising back to her feet. "So, is your room still there?"
"It is. Though I have to say, yours is quite larger than mine."
"Really? And here I thought they would all look the same."
"I'm afraid mine lacks this sizable kitchen. And this scenic view." Y'shtola walked over to the window, looking out into the distance for a moment before turning back towards S'eni. They stared at one another in silence until the other woman began to rub her arm awkwardly.
"What's wrong?" S'eni asked, looking at herself again. "Did something change?"
"No, your aether is still the same as earlier. It's...actually, it's rather silly I have to admit."
"Well, what is it?"
"I...just can't relax," Y'shtola admitted. "I have spent so many days out in the wilderness of the Greatwoods that being in a large city again feels strange to me. I know it will pass, but in the meantime, I was hoping we could talk a little."
"You know, Shtola, if you want to stay over just say so," she said, stepping up towards her and giving her a smile. She took Y'shtola's hand and gently ran her thumb across it. "I'm not going to say no."
"I told you it was silly, didn't I?" her lover chuckled and the awkwardness dissipated again, turning instead into a comfortable silence as they both began to look out of the window.
After a moment, S'eni spoke up once more, "You think they'll be fine? The Blessed, I mean."
"They will be now. Thanks to you." Y'shtola smiled.
"Even without Master Matoya's guidance?"
"They don't need my guidance anymore."
"Hmm, I don't know. I'm pretty sure Runar will greatly miss it," she said in a light tone. "Seeing as he's obviously head over heels for you."
Y'shtola released a sigh, but it was filled with fondness. "He wears his heart on his sleeve. A boy in the body of a man if you will."
"I guess..."
Moving her gaze back towards S'eni, the other Miqo'te cocked an eyebrow, shortly followed by the corners of her lips curling up into a small smirk. "Don't tell me you're jealous."
"Jealous? Me? No no." Ah, who was she kidding?
She exhaled deeply, letting go of Y'shtola's hand, and walked over to her bed.
"Fine, I'm a bit jealous," she conceded and sat down on top of it, averting her gaze. "It's been three years for you after all. That's a long time."
"It is a long time. Especially these last two years. Runar has been a steadfast companion in that time. Him and the Night's Blessed, they have become family to me." The mattress shifted as Y'shtola joined her and two fingers were placed under her chin to turn her head. Her lover smiled. "I should feel flattered, actually, but I think it's only fair that you get to feel the way I did in the past."
A look of confusion formed on her face. "You did? When?"
Y'shtola gave her a look before replying, "Remember when a certain Knight Commander invited you over?"
"Aymeric?" she blinked. "But that was just dinner, nothing more."
"Yes, and I'm sure he had absolutely nothing else in mind." the dryness in Y'shtola's voice could rival the deserts of Thanalan.
And just like that, she felt a veil falling off her eyes, and she wanted nothing more to kick herself. A few minutes ago she was still teasing Ardbert, when she herself had proven to be even more blind. She wanted to laugh at the stupidity of it all.
So she did. "Oh gods, I'm dumb aren't I?"
"Well, those are not the words I would choose, but this time I feel I'm inclined to agree," Y'shtola giggled into her fist.
"Ouch." S'eni grinned. "But I guess I deserved that."
"Indeed." After giving her a small wink, the other woman removed her fingers and guided them towards one of her ears instead. "I have noticed in Rak'tika, but it's strange to see your ears so bare."
"Yeah, lost one while fighting the Lightwarden at Holminster. I tossed the other into my pack since it felt weird to just wear one." Which was a shame, because she really liked that pair.
"I see…" Y'shtola pulled her hand back, tapping her knuckles against her cheek for a moment before turning away from her. When she turned back, she had a small box in her hand. "I had actually wanted to wait until a more appropriate time, but I suppose now is as good as any."
After saying that, she held the box out towards S'eni.
Looking from the box, to Y'shtola, and back again, she took it. It was a simple box made of wood, no decoration or anything. But when she opened it, her eyes grew wide at the beautiful pair of earrings inside.
Arranged in a flower pattern were eight deep red gems, lavishly set in bright gold. Three crystal-shaped silver pieces were attached to the bottom.
"During my journey, I came across a gemstone native to the First. I kept it with me mainly so that I might have something to trade with should the need arise, but by the time I had settled with the Blessed at Slitherbough I had another idea. So I asked one of them to fashion a pair of earrings from them," her lover explained. "Whenever I felt myself doubting, I would look at them and think of you."
"Shtola…"
"Put them on." Y'shtola urged her with a smile.
Gingerly, as if to not break them, S'eni took them out of the box and attached them to her ears. Much to her surprise, they were far lighter than their appearance would indicate. "Well, how do I look?" she asked after she was done.
Instead of replying, the other Miqo'te reached out to cup her cheek again. "Not a day has passed in which I didn't think of you. How worried you must be, how much you must be pushing yourself." her thumb brushed against the corner of her lips. "But also how much I missed your smile, or how damned stubborn you could be at times."
S'eni placed her hand on top of Y'shtola's hand. "Pot calling the kettle black, much?"
They shared a little laugh.
"If there is one thing I learned in these three years, it's that absence truly does make the heart grow fonder."
Slowly, they inched closer until their foreheads came to rest on one another.
"Eni…" she exhaled, the soft warmth of her breath tickling her face. "I love you."
"I love you too…"
Their lips finally met.
Eyes fluttering closed, S'eni released a happy sigh as they kissed; soft and warm, filled with the feelings they had just shared, and hidden within, the promise of so much more. The fingers that had rested on her cheek moved to tangle themselves deep into her hair, nails softly caressing her scalp and drawing out a small purr from deep within her.
Soon enough, their lips grew bolder, seeking more of the other. Gods, she had missed this so much!
She wound an arm around her lover's waist, pulling her closer and receiving a pleasant gasp from her that sent a shiver down a spine right into the tip of her tail.
Lowering them onto the mattress, she separated herself from Y'shtola to smile down at her, her eyes coming to rest upon a pair of silvery moons glowing up at her in the light and looking absolutely…
"...beautiful," was all she said, before drifting back down onto waiting lips and letting herself drown in her love.
Finally, they shared those big three words. And Y'shtola was the one to say them first too, who would have thought?
I've always intended for Shadowbringers to be the start of the "third phase" of their relationship to truly begin. Hope it was a satisfactory moment.
Now to the announcement, I'm afraid it's slightly bad news. Not bad bad, just that I will be slowing updates down to one chapter per week so that I actually don't accidentaly run out of chapters before I can write them. When I started posting this fic I had it all written out until the moment S'eni and Y'shtola got together and I thought that would give me enough breathing room for the rest, but as always life sometimes gets in the way, so I decided to rather post less than post none at all. I hope you understand.
So with that, see you next week. :)