**Author's note: Hi guys! I really appreciate all your kind words during this difficult time. To be fully transparent, I'm going through a very nasty divorce from an abusive husband, but I am okay and safe now. I'm finally separated from him so I can try to do more things for myself and recover as a person- especially by focusing on finishing this story (because I know it's been going on for a very long time now lol). Thank you again for sticking with me through these difficult times, I know I keep saying this, but I truly am grateful for each and every one of you for your support and presence! Hope you enjoy!
BAM! Yuji was kicked all the way to the opposite side of the field, hitting the trees in a big explosion of debris.
"Sensei! What the hell?!" Nobara shrieked, staring wide-eyed at the impact. "What is wrong with you?!"
"He's fine." Satoru muttered, shoving his sunglasses further up his nose.
"I wonder if he survived that." Maki commented, an eyebrow raised at her old teacher's unusual lack of restraint.
Satoru raised his hand to cup his mouth, projecting his voice. "Yuji, come back! You're fine, right?"
He was met with silence.
"Sensei! He's definitely dead!" Panda exclaimed, rubbing his face in distress with his furry paws."Someone call Qian, we need medical attention!"
The man froze at the mention of her name. "That won't be necessar-"
Suddenly, a hand popped up behind a pile of broken trunks and fallen trees. "I-I'm good!" Yuji's pink hair appeared through the dust as he crawled out, resting his chin on the rubble beneath him as he gasped for air. "Can someone give me a hand?"
"I gotchu!" Panda cried, immediately rushing towards the crash. As Nobara and Maki followed suit, Toge jogged after them before throwing a glance at his teacher. "Salmon."
Satoru sighed, rubbing the back of his neck in frustration. Why was he so irritated? He tapped his foot into the ground, racking his brain in confusion. Was it because Toshinori and Vivian were back?
Vivian was a surprise, but he didn't think anything of her return. On the other hand, when he thought of her brother, a ripple of irritation coursed through him. He tried to remember his school days with the man. He never had an issue with him. He was an upperclassman, but he never actually learned nor saw his abilities first hand. The Hitsunara clan was known to do elemental manipulation as their cursed technique, and while he knew about Vivian's abilities, he had no clue about her brother's. When he tried asking her, she shook her head.
"Sorry, Satoru. He's the special child of our clan and always trained in isolation, so I'm honestly as lost as you."
Back when he was immature, he did try to challenge the guy in a sparring session, but the latter had simply laughed in his face in response.
"Me? Fight against the Gojo Satoru? No thanks. I'll obviously lose."
And after that, no matter how much he tried, and the punches he threw, the man never fought back. Choosing to evade and dodge his blows, or simply run away from him. Suguru himself also had no information on him, although…
"I wouldn't." His best friend warned. "He's a mystery that seems not worth solving."
He was always that kind of guy who didn't care to display his strength, choosing to live his life vicariously as he liked.
Do I hate his personality? Satoru shook his head and palmed his face, knowing the answer. It wasn't that he disliked him as a person, he never really made an impression in his life.
It's just, he's always been loud and boisterous- treating everyone like their buddies or old pals. It doesn't help that-
He faltered in his step. That what? He thought back to the interaction between Toshinori and Qian. Of course the older man immediately was very friendly with her. The familiar green monster reared its head within him as he recalled their embrace. Even more so, when Toshinori recognized her. He was the one who saved her, immediately remembering her. Turns out, after all this time, it was never him.
And why did it bother him that much?
"God, this is ridiculous." He kicked a rock underneath him and continued his stride.
"Sensei…you're scaring me." He turned to see Megumi simply standing a couple feet away, his hands casually resting in his pockets.
Satoru forced a grin. "What? Not checking on your beloved teammate of yours?"
Megumi shrugged. "I know you well enough that you'd never land a fatal hit on your student. It looks as though you're taking something out on us, seems like something is on your mind."
The sorcerer turned away. "Nah, just didn't sleep well last night. Don't worry about it."
His student sighed, running a hand through his spiky hair. "Alright, well. Try to keep it together. You're an adult, after all, aren't you?"
Satoru's eyes widened in shock, gaping at the boy's audacity as the teen rushed off, following his teammates.
—-
Kurofiru nimbly landed on the top of a utility pole, surveying the street beneath him. Save for a few unknowing pedestrians, the neighborhood appeared to be quiet and empty.
He knelt down to scrutinize the house that stood before him. He narrowed his eyes in an attempt to peer through the window on the first floor; the curtains were opened but it was dark inside. The sun had all but set, and not a single light was turned on.
He waited several minutes, shifting his body so he sat on the top of the metal beam. Minutes turned to hours as his gaze remained fixated at the window. His limbs ached and burned, but he remained rigid, refusing to relax as he stared onward. If she showed up here, he had to be ready. He'd make it swift.
And then he'd finally be free from his past.
Finally, the light turned on, causing him to flinch out of his reverie. He immediately pushed himself off the pole, landing in the bushes in a quiet thud. He crept forward, peering through the glass for a closer look. His eyes widened as he recognized the man entering the room, haphazardly throwing his coat over the couch.
"GET THE HELL AWAY FROM HER!"
He sneered as he recollected his obnoxious voice. Her overprotective brother.
"Zeng, please, would you calm down?" Followed behind him closely was a slender woman who he also recognized. Her mother. "Gojo-san already told us she was in a safe place, just let this go and leave her be."
"Ma, you know what that cocky bastard is capable of." Zeng was clutching his hair in frustration as he paced across the room. "He's always hid his real agenda from the administration, who knows what he could be doing to her."
"Listen to your mother, Zeng." A towering man entered the room and Kurofiru gritted his teeth.
"Where is that brat?! What did he do to you?" The man shouted, straightening his back to search his surroundings.
Their protectiveness, their love for the girl, was burned into his consciousness- even after all these years of trying to forget. White, hot anger began to burn inside him as the repressed memory began to unfold inside his mind.
"Oh no… Ha-kun, did you fall again?"
She gently cleaned the cut on his cheek with a cotton tip as he grimaced in pain. "Yeah… I'm fine."
"No, you're not!" Her tiny hands rummaged through the first aid kit that was resting on her lap. "You need to wear a, like, a pillow or something, to cushion you when you fall. You're so clumsy!"
He was silent once more and Qian softened her gaze as she placed her hand over his own. "Ha-kun… if there's something bothering you, you know you can tell me, right?"
He really wanted to tell her the truth. All the yelling, the wounds, the pain in his home. "Qi… what if I told you I didn't fall?"
The girl tilted her head at him quizzically. "What do you mean?"
"I mean… what if… someone hurt me?" He whispered.
Qian's eyes widened in shock. "Ha-kun… are you serious?"
He looked away, about to nod before she grasped his hands in both her own. "Hayato-kun, if someone is hurting you… you need to tell your mommy and daddy right away!"
He froze, his head turning towards her slowly as he stared at her with wide eyes. "What… what did you say?"
"Did you tell your mommy and daddy?" Qian cried, her eyes welling up in tears. "If someone is hurting you… you need to tell them so they can protect you!"
"W-Why would they do that?" He found himself asking, his mind going numb.
"B-Because they love you! My mommy and daddy would do whatever they could to protect me, I'm sure it's the same with you!"
A flicker of anger came over him as he suddenly ripped his hand out of her grip, covering her mouth as he glared at her.
"What do you know?!" He roared, pinning her to the ground. "You know NOTHING. NOTHING ABOUT THEM."
"GET THE HELL AWAY FROM HER!" His head whipped towards the right as he heard a loud voice, seeing a teenage boy rushing towards him. Following closely behind were two adults. He immediately scrambled off of her, running out of the park as he ducked behind the wall.
"D-Daddy! M-Mommy! Nii-san!" She was immediately enveloped in a huge hug as her family embraced her.
"Where is that brat?! What did he do to you?" The man shouted, straightening his back to search his surroundings.
"Daddy, he didn't do anything! It's my fault!" Qian cried, shaking her head wildly.
He glowered at the sight: the woman held her close to her bosom as the older boy patted her head in comfort. The man stood protectively in front of them as he reached into his pocket, taking out his cell phone to dial a number.
Bile rose in the back of his throat. Why… why them? Why not me?
He thought back to what waited for him at home… with his "family". The rage in his mind burned as he stalked back home.
What did I do to deserve this? That's why she's so nice… so fucking kind. I'm sick of it. I'm so sick of it all.
I want this pain to end.
"Both of you know what he's capable of!" Kurofiru was shaken out of his stupor upon hearing the older Tomioka bicker. "What if he hurts her?"
"He won't." Chase stood before his son, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Son, you need to learn to let things be. You can't control everything."
But the man shoved off his father's grasp, choosing to leave the room. The sound of the door being slammed shut echoed throughout the walls.
Yi-lang sighed, placing a hand on her forehead as her husband rubbed her arms affectionately. "He'll come around." He murmured, kissing the top of her brow.
"I know, dear. I just… I can't help but worry about our little girl." She bemoaned, turning and burrowing her face into his chest.
Bile rose in the back of his throat as he tore his eyes away, taking a couple steps back as he clutched his head painfully. More and more of his unwanted memories flowed out of his suppressed consciousness, reverberating through his mind in full force.
**Trigger warning- mentions of violence and self-harm**
"Hayato?! Where the fuck have you been?!" His father roared from his spot on the couch, bottles and cans of alcohol scattered across the table and floor. In front of him, the lights from the TV flickered on the walls of their living room. At the far wall was a lit fireplace, the flames casting ominous shadows across the floor. "I told you to get me more chips from the convenience store an hour ago!"
He barely registered his stomach was starving and he made his way to the kitchen, where he opened the scarcely stocked fridge. Tucked in the back drawer, hidden behind rotting vegetables, was a small loaf of bread.
'I made it for you this weekend! I hope you like it, it's my first time baking something!' Her shy voice echoed in his mind as he pulled it out, numbly placing it on the counter. He pulled the drawer open, withdrawing a knife to cut himself a piece.
"Hayato! Are you deaf, did you hear me?!" His father stomped into the kitchen and upon seeing him holding the bread on the counter, he narrowed his eyes. "Where did you get that?!"
He gripped the pastry tightly in his hand, the knife in the other. "Nowhere, it's mine."
"No it ain't- anything in this house belongs to me!" He stumbled forward, immediately swinging the back of his hand against the boy's cheek, flinging him to the other side of the room.
His face throbbing, his eyes dizzy from the impact, he saw his father shoving the entire loaf into his grimy mouth. As he snorted and munched away at the treat, the burning rage in the back of his mind began flooding his senses, his vision becoming eerily clear as something glittered to his right. He saw the knife he was holding before just a mere foot away.
'I want them to disappear… I want this pain to end.'
He grabbed the knife.
As his father's bloodied, lifeless body laid in front of him. He could hear footsteps coming down the stairs.
"Dear? What's all the noise? I just finished showering-" His mother came around the corner and upon witnessing the horror before her, she screamed and rushed forward, kneeling on top of the man's body.
"DEAR?! Dear, please wake up!" She cried, cradling his head in her arms. She twisted her neck to look at the boy before her, her eyes wild with hysteria.
"You… YOU!" She shrieked, pointing a bloody finger at the boy. "YOU MONSTER. YOU- YOU DEMON CHILD. HOW COULD YOU?! I SHOULD'VE NEVER GIVEN BIRTH TO YOU."
As she sobbed over the man's broken body, he numbly stared down at the knife in front of him. He thought back to how a few hours earlier, a different woman held Qian so close to her, hugging her tightly as if to shelter her.
I want them to disappear… I want this pain to end.
His body moved on its own.
Blood seeped into the hardwood floor, soaking his socks as he stood there, just staring at the two bodies before him.
He heard the crackling of wood and turned to the living room to see the fire still lit. He vaguely remembered watching a cop show once, where they chased the bad guys through a restaurant, that exploded due to the gas stoves and lit flames.
He stared back down at his hands. His bloodied hands. His mother was right- he should have never been born. Then maybe, he would never have felt suffering.
He turned on all the knobs of the stove, ignoring the fact that they didn't ignite. He held the knife to his face, scrutinizing his own reflection in the red-stained blade.
He pressed the edge into his skin.
I want them to disappear… I want this pain to end.
…I want to disappear.
**End of trigger**
"Who the fuck are you?" He whirled around to see Zeng standing before him. He inwardly cursed, realizing his exit didn't mean he went to a different room. He had left the house.
Kurofiru immediately raised his hands and a flurry of leaves shot forward, but Zeng quickly leapt to the side, avoiding the onslaught. His eyes flickered to silver, causing the younger man's vision to blur. He swayed to the side, his eyes suddenly feeling immensely heavy.
Shit. His last thought drifted into oblivion as darkness enveloped his senses.