"What do you mean by that..?"
"Piece it out Hange, I know you know what I meant."
"You can't possibly say... you're from outside the walls..."
"Quite the miss." Everyone was looking at you, hanging at your every word.
"I'm from outside your universe."
There are millions of ways this could've played out, if Marco lived to tip the military.
"Marco, listen to how you sound right now."
"Unless you're like them—"
"If I'm a titan in disguise, do you think I'll save you?"
Good thing though, he dived straight to the most likely route.
"Then what are you?" You could hear the pointing of fingers in his tone. "You acted as if you knew everything— as if... as if Armin will get saved, o-or that E-Eren will be—"
"I didn't know Eren can shift. I didn't know if Armin could save himself, but those two are more than capable." Your tone sounded casual and certain, and that was a good thing.
"Eren didn't graduate on top of the list if he couldn't handle a single titan— he survived Shiganshina massacre. Armin? Armin is smart. You know that."
He was not having it, it's so patent in his eyes.
"Armin can plan ahead remember? Remember when we saved Christa from the bandits in the mountains? He planned, we executed. He's smart and he values his life. He wouldn't die from a single titan."
"But he froze—"
"But he got through it. He's not someone who loses his shit and freeze on the spot because if he did that, he's finished." Yeah, Febe, you're not one to talk...
"You did though, didn't you?"
"I didn't mean to freeze..." He murmured under his breath. Under normal circumstances, you wouldn't use that time when he froze about making decisions between Eren and Thomas and the three honorary Marleyans against him, but you too, were running out of patience.
You sighed to stretch your patience an inch more, patting him in the shoulder for damage control.
"It was scary, I know. But there's one thing only both of us can do." You inhaled deeply, mentally preparing yourself for another round of pain. Really, you don't think you can take anymore...
Your stomach grumbled.
"As I thought, I should tell—"
"No."
"Why not—"
"And then what?" You spat, frustration laced your words. "Let me tell you what's gonna happen to you Marco." You were hissing now, that inch of patience you just sighed just snapped. "Telling the higher ups will get you arrested, then tortured for information and eventually get executed even though you did what you think is right."
"But Phoebe, this is something that will help the humanity's victory over the titans! If they knew about them, they could prevent further unnecessary killings!"
"But you'll get killed Marco— think about it!"
"But we can't let them roam around either! They could put a hole in wall Rose— maybe today, or next week!"
You've had enough. You're hungry, you're exhausted, and sure as fuck you took some blows in your body! And for him to throw his life away after all these shit you've been through? You have the right to be angry.
"Or maybe now as we speak, right? So if you think of it that way, then go and die, Marco! I only did what I think is right— is saving you. If you think your life is a small price to pay, then by all means be my guest!"
You winced at your sudden movement.
He didn't say anything and you decided to continue your litany of convincing the freckled wimp.
"But when you're dead, you can never pin this on me."
He was still trying to process the consequences of what he's so determined to do.
"Because your too dead to do something so alive like tipping the military."
You bent over your side of the bed and slid your gear on his side, the one covered with your clothes.
"If you wanna do something, do this." He raised his face to meet your gaze.
"This is your gear now. If someone asked if you modified it, tell them it's me."
You didn't spend your succeeding days in the ward. Any soldier who could limp their way out with a crutch should go. If they are physically capable of helping, they'd have to take care the next batch of soldiers who will take over their makeshift beds.
So you were tossed in the corner of the expanding camp, doing whatever you can to either stay out of the medics or help.
There were more casualties than the Garrison that they needed to pull out other branches of the military to help.
There was a time where they had to poke a hole on a titan's vomit to find out if there were survivors. The rawness of the smell of flesh and mucus together with the smell of decay plagued the entire camp, it made everyone hurl.
You heard Eren's roars, the blasts of his punches and the fall of debris from where you were that day. Even when it's days' over, the reverb of Trost played clearly when you close your eyes. There was nothing to do but try as much as you could, to ignore everything and sleep it off.
But when you couldn't take it anymore, you plotted how things will play through, after Marco tells Hange the gear is yours.
Sonny and Bean will get killed.
Hange will order a surprise inspection.
Armin will notice that Annie's gear is Marco's and Marco has yours. This will create a suspicion not just with Annie, but with you as well.
And all Marco had to do is to tell Hange it was yours.
Marco will most likely tell the truth, knowing there will be someone to confirm what he'll say. What Annie and the two did to him, what he heard from the three, and how you managed to save him.
Modifying the gear was the first part of the plan. Saving Marco will give you the attention you needed from Hange to work immediately by their side. Basic assembly of gears is part of the training corps curriculum, but studying how the mechanism works seemed forbidden. You noticed this when you were still a cadet, that time when you had a peer competition as to who can replace blades and gas tanks first. Lectures never went in depth regarding the machine, only on refilling the gas and replacing the blades. Not knowing how to fix the gears was also the reason why the stock house is crowded with 'unfixable' ones. If you were to guess, the blueprint of the standard- issued gears had been kept somewhere in Mitras, where the people who knew the secrets of the walls reside.
When Hange learns about you and what you could do, Erwin will do his best to get you on their side.
Then you will lead them faster to the caves so you could have an access to raw energy, then work on building that the prototype generator you have in your cabin. When it's not possible, you'll lead them to Marley, steal their technology, go home, end of story.
It sounds easy, but the thought of torture devices waiting for you in few days time filled you with dread.
Marco visited frequently. You always meant to ask him if Reiner's group is on the move but the boy had been diligent in avoiding them. He had not seen the three so far because he took your advice to always be with a group of people or be with someone all the time. It's working for him, and somehow that eased your nerves.
Though it has been two days since you last saw the boy.
He should come with Jean today.
"Hey." Jean, for the first time in days, after that sappy shit in the stables, visited you. There were also Thomas, Sasha, Connie, Christa, and Ymir.
Seeing them alive brought smile to your face.
"How you doin'?" Jean said, giving you a boiled egg. Must've cost them a fortune.
"Alive." You responded, taking it.
"Heard you saved Marco from a titan. He was like a brother. Thank you."
"No biggie." You grinned as you receive that get well card from Christa. You knew how expensive coloring materials are. (You're still mad at the three for a gold 'bargain' whenever you remember!) You're grateful for receiving something seemingly insignificant in your world, but costs an arm and a leg in theirs.
"Thank you. You didn't have to. The eggs are enough." You chuckles faded when you noticed everyone was at awe.
"Something on my face?" You scanned around.
"No..." Christa said, trailing her words like she just saw something amazing.
"Phoebe, you..." It was Sasha's turn now. "You look better when you smile!" She exclaimed.
"Yeah, you always have this angry look or you're just staring at a space." Said Connie.
"You really should smile!" Christa agreed.
"Told you she's cute." Urgh, Jean.
"Then stay alive, all of you guys, so I won't have to frown so much." You smiled at the sudden praises, rubbing your nose as if it would stop you from feeling giddy. Then their faces soured...
"Am I missing something here..?" The smile on your face faded when you noticed someone was missing.
Marco.
Jean bowed his head, showing respect that you did something to prolong what Marco had to spare in his last days. In the cost of your wounds and bruises, you gave him a few more days to live.
"Thank you for saving his life once."
His gratitude is humbling, but that's not the point—what happened to Marco? He was supposed to get killed in Trost and you prevented that already, right?
"He was found where the captured titans were killed."
It was as if ice cold water poured at the top of your head and somehow, you forgot the aches your body had to endure. You can't form the words of your rage— you wanted to smash everything so badly to stop the rush of energy in your body. You knew exactly what happened to him.
Someone fed him to the titans, and you knew who they were.
What was the weeks of preparation for? Your plan worked, did it not? You did everything— looked at every angle, then how was it possible that Marco had to die despite your efforts? Did he feel the need to talk to someone in private in order to make sense why Annie and Reiner had to do that? Can't he at least wait for Hange to inspect your gear? Was it not enough that he can talk to you about his worries? Did he really see his life as something so insignificant that even half of yours meant nothing to him?
"Where was he before he...?" Your tone went quiet, trying to contain the anger just simmering above your lid.
"He was seen loitering alone around the makeshift camp for days before... that..." Connie said sourly, and you gritted your molars hearing that he did what you exactly warned him not to do. That idiot...
He was probably looking for someone like Hange or Erwin in the site to tell about the titan shifters, but then the warriors just have to be there too, and they took the chance to feed him to a titan, before killing the titans too.
Marco was intuitive, but not strategic.
The panel of his gruesome death flashed in your memory; the smell of smoke and decay in Trost was palpable you gagged...
"We have to take your gear, that's why we came here, Phoebe. The titans squad leader Hange captured were killed, so they wanted to inspect the Privates too." Said Jean.
"It's with Marco." You responded, shocking them.
"Huh?"
"Why... is it with Marco?" Jean was taken aback with this fresh information. "You let him use it?"
You hummed. "I don't know what happened to his gear, so I let him take mine until I'm better. He used it to get me here, because he wasn't wearing any when I found him. You should find my gear on his stuff. It's quite big— it's hard to miss." You had to deny seeing Reiner's group to protect yourself from their suspicions. Anyway, Armin will connect the dots...
"He didn't have a gear?"
"Why is it big...?"
"Yeah, Marco didn't have a gear. That was weird for me too. Just take it, and steal me some morphine— any pain killer will do, please." But Jean simply nodded, his mind processing this lie and left without saying a word.
You didn't know how many days have you been strapped on this chair; your leg and spine hurt, your ass numb and flattened...
You don't even know how many nails you have left.
I told Jean to give me morphine...
"Darrrmit, Yan..." You drooled over your shirt.
The military police just had to have a go at you. At first, it was a swing to the face, then you passed out. Waking up, they were discussing about cutting your pinkie off until you threatened them of their affairs to their co-workers and a few barkeepers. You knew corruption was like a dime a dozen for them, so it wasn't a threat. They contemplated about gouging your tongue out, but they won't be able to squeeze information out of you. It was a hit and miss, until you finally nailed them in the head:
An unnamed Military Police officer having an affair with his co-workers' wife.
And since you weren't talking, they thought of having your ear or your eye but you threatened them to bite your tongue and say bye-bye.
You're almost crossing the river Styx until Hange showed like a hero.
Oh, there's Miche too.
"We're having custody over Private Phoebe Johnson." Was what Hange announced, and you could only assume it was a warrant of arrest signed by Zackley.
So here you are.
"Whama I geh cushduddy foh?" You managed to mumble, your jaw misaligned and hurting, ruining Miche's jacket with your drool. Your ankle was worse and more swollen than before— your arm wound, now infected that you're running a fever. It was difficult to move by how constrained the MPs tied you, and your muscles ached at the littlest of movements you made.
You caught a glimpse of your fingers, where your nails are gone and there's just nothing but blood and pus.
Miche carried you out while Hange explained what transpired after the military police had custody over you.
"Treason by Non-Disclosure of Sensitive Information Paramount to Public Safety."
"Beecush o' mah geey?"
"Not just your gear, Johnson," They showed you your cellphone long dead and gone; a part of the world you lived before coming to theirs. "No one has seen these things before."
You almost couldn't contain yourself because this had been what you've been expecting. You managed to steal Hange's attention! There was this knowing smirk in your lips, a glint in your eyes... you've been patient, and now, you harvest what you planted.
The military police turned out to be clueless of the things Hange and the Survey corps found in your barracks. If they do, they could have had you guillotined or hanged there and then. But Erwin chose to keep it to themselves.
Good choice.
Miche settled you on Erwin's receiving area, while the others, meaning Erwin and Hange tried to make you comfortable. You caught a glance of Captain Levi in the corner, as he watched the whole thing unfold. Hange then went ahead and examined your wounds; from the ankle to the nails, to the misaligned jaw...
"Do you want me to fix your jaw for you? It's quick but painful." Hange offered sincerely. "I'll give you a warm towel after."
"It only hurts because you don't know how to do it properly." Levi retorted in the corner.
"Don't listen to him, Moblit taught me how to do it."
"I'll do it." Miche bent down to meet you eye to eye. You instinctively put your hands against him to let him know you didn't want his help. He's not dubbed as Humanity's second strongest for nothing, and you knew those bear-like hands can do more damage than fix your jaw.
"Hanshee..." You tried to communicate while drooling over your chin, "Le Hanshee..."
"See? She wants me to do it." Hange bragged.
"I'll call Petra." Levi said loudly that it gathered the attention of the room. "You don't have a problem with that now, do you?" He addressed that question to you. You shook your head, letting him call the lady who soon massaged your jaw and snapped them right back so quickly you only felt the pain after it was done.
She was kind enough to untwist your ankle with a smile on her face.
"Is there anything else sir?" Petra asked politely. Her daintiness and brightness is so refreshing after the battle at Trost. Levi dismissed her after and your attention returned to veterans doting you right now... Miche especially, who took a whiff of you, as if he can't smell how onion-y you are, within a five-meter radius. You slightly leaned away from the big guy. All the sniffing made you self-conscious because your last bath was before the battle at Trost.
"Miche does that, don't worry about it too much." Hange reassured you, tending to your bloodied nose. You wanted to speak but your jaw still feels a little tight.
"Speaking makes it better." Levi suddenly blurted out, as if reading your mind. You promptly bowed at him, then you replied to Hange's reassurance that Miche is never a creepy guy.
"He seems like a sniffer." You murmured under your breath.
"How did you know?" Hange ecstatically asked. Seeing Hange this close with their breath smelling like an old year cheese, their greasy hair part; those sharp, feline eyes and aquiline nose never dissuade you of how pretty they are. The soon commander is cheerful and carefree. Inquisitive wonder hid behind those spectacles that no one would suspect Hange is capable of a rage so great they could top Levi's and Erwin's temper.
"Hmm?" They urged you, while you appreciate their features up close.
"He looks like a sniffer." You said flatly.
"But humor us, we found things hidden under your bed's floorboards," It was Erwin's turn to ask the questions. Hange carelessly let gravity do the trick in emptying your trusty hiker's bag.
And you wished you could react faster than how mortified you were.
"Don't—!" You exclaimed, your jaw clicking when you did. You at least managed to save your laptop from the fall. Damn it Hange, laptops are hella expensive!
Th-The portable driller... your screwdriver set, soldering iron, and lead cord... your cheap electrical testers...
Your towels...
Modern clothings...
Your brassiere...
Your panties... that Miche had to pick up and fucking observe!
You slapped your forehead, you can't deal with this right now. Your muscles were angry at you at the sudden movement, vertigo swirled your vision that Hange had to hold you steady.
"You guys aren't virgins, you know where that goes." You held a tight, tenacious smile underneath your wrist—
"Miche, put those down please. You can't wear them, they're not for sale." And he dropped so promptly the moment you clicked your tongue.
"What? We can't take them out?" Hange panicked. You looked at your trusty tools and personal effects scattered all over the floor with defeat painted in your face.
"They're fragile... and expensive..." You could feel your soul leave your body, but there's nothing more to do, the damage has been done.
"You should've taken them out, one at a time..."
"S-Sorry..." Hange apologized. And they say a break up is the most painful thing that could happen to a person...
"When is my trial anyway..." You sniffed, still looking at your tools. They were expensive and it's not like you can find a replacement in this place! You could sell a lung and a kidney, but you still can't find them here!
"No real trial actually. A mock trial in exchange to that modified gear you made. How did you do that anyway?"
"What do you mean mock—" You diverted your attention to Hange, "You're saying I'm acquitted already?"
"Yeah, for formalities' sake but you have Erwin to thank for. He leveraged your gear to study in exchange for your acquittal."
You looked at Erwin, and stared at him for a long minute. He observed the tools on the floor with such curiosity of which part goes to which part. He played with the driller for a bit, weighing it by his hands, pressing the trigger that didn't do anything. You can't help but smile when he figured out that the jaw holds the drill bits and you almost lost it when he looked at you, and asked what it was for.
Erwin Smith acts like a kid, it's so cute!
You would've gone to the heavy details— from the history to the evolution, parts, to the trusted brands, but you held your tongue when you realize there were other people around.
"But did you think about it? Joining the Survey corps?" He suddenly asked, catching you off guard.
"I did." You responded, all business like. It was a no-brainer choice; they have no idea how much you've waited for this.
"In one condition." He met you eye to eye.
"What is it?" His voice is still the same. Deep. Gentle. Velvety.
"My safety," You said firmly. "You have to keep me alive."
"Oi, no-nail woman," Captain Levi interjected, forcing you to tear away your gaze from Erwin's. "Erwin just helped you out of your mess, so don't be shameless to think your shit's expensive."
"Maybe not in my world, but certainly I am in yours." You sounded so cocky.
"What do you mean by that..?" Hange was confused.
"Piece it out Hange, I know you know what I meant."
Soon, Hange's gaze came wide, their mouth a little agape. Their cheeks flushed as her eyes widened when she realized.
"You can't possibly say... you're from outside the walls..." Hange concluded, taking a step back at how incredulous you sounded.
"Quite the miss." Everyone looked at you, hanging at your every word. Hange almost got it.
"I'm from outside your universe."