A/N: Welcome to the final chapter of this story. Of course this isn't the final chapter of the overall series. There is much more in store for Nova and her family. Stay tuned for more going into Part 2 :)

Chapter 12: Epilogue—Nova's Thoughts

"Wow!" I exclaim as Dad takes his fingers off of my temples, and we return to the Waking World, back on the sofa in the TARDIS library. "That was… I don't even know how to describe what I saw! There are so many thoughts in my head, I don't even know where to start!"

That was so beautiful! He had just shown me an entire compilation of his (plus Mom's) memories of my birth and everything leading up to it, and it was one of the most amazing experiences of my life. The most exhilarating thing of all was the fact that I could feel every single emotion—the fear, the excitement, the love, all of it—from both of my parents (depending on whose point of view it was) and all of the struggles they had to go through. It was all so surreal yet utterly mind-blowing at the same time.

"That's quite alright," Dad chuckles next to me as he straightens his bow tie. "We can talk about everything if you like; I'm more than happy to. This was what I was most looking forward to, anyway. How're you feeling, now that you've seen everything; everything leading up to your birth?"

"Honestly… I am completely mind-blown!" I say, shaking my head in disbelief. "Seriously, I have so many thoughts that they feel like they've made my entire brain explode—not literally, but you know what I mean. I have so many questions, I don't even know how to get them all out!"

"Well, we'll start with the first question that comes to mind, and we'll move on from there," he suggests with a shrug. "How does that sound?"

"Okay," I shrug with uncertainty on where to start. "Um… Well, these aren't questions, but I would like to start off with a few comments on some of the minor things."

"Go on," Dad smiles eagerly as he pivots his body to face me fully.

I immediately spout off the first thing that comes to mind. "Okay. First off, I would like to say it was really neat that you compiled all of your memories, plus Mom's, into one giant memory. Seeing all of them felt like watching a movie on a TV screen, except instead of looking through a TV screen, we were standing in the actual memory, like we were living through it in real time like everybody else, even though nobody could see us, but it was still a really cool experience. It was also really cool to see familiar memories, such as that emotional scene with you carrying Baby Me here in the TARDIS library before you gave me up, and that scene at the very end when I returned to the TARDIS with Mom and met you for the very first time. And all those times when you and Mom were watching me grow up, and I had no idea you were even there… It was very surreal to see those memories from a different point of view and not my own."

Dad nods, saying, "Yes. I figured you'd like to see those memories again."

"I'm glad you did," I say before switching topics. "Next, I'd like to say it was especially cool to see Madame Vastra and Strax help you in saving me from the Silence, since you mentioned that they did that when I first met them. Back then, I didn't think much of it, since I had no memory of seeing them before that moment, but now that I've seen that memory from your point of view, now I can appreciate them more. It makes me wish I had understood better, and I would've given them a big hug in thanks."

"Don't worry. There's still time to tell them," he assures me. "Perhaps you can tell them during our next visit."

"Yes, I would like that," I nod before changing topics again. "I can understand how much of a struggle it was for you to keep Mom safe while she was pregnant with me. I could feel her frustration as she carried me in the womb, and she couldn't function as well as she normally would when she wasn't pregnant. I imagine she struggled to do the things she loved but couldn't while she was pregnant. For example, she couldn't help you on your travels, since her condition wouldn't let her; it seemed like I was slowing her down, hence why you were so strict about her staying in the TARDIS and hardly ever going out even to see my grandparents.

"I could tell it was a major struggle for you to keep the secret of Mom being a Flesh avatar from her. That must've been awful, having to pretend like nothing was wrong, even while you were searching for her real self behind her back. And then once you revealed the truth and were forced to disintegrate her… That was the worst." I remember crying while viewing that memory and sensing Dad's pain and anguish of losing his beloved wife and me, thinking we were gone forever (which was not entirely true, of course).

"Yes," he sighs sadly, "it was horrible. Indeed, for a long time I thought I had lost you and your mother forever, but deep down I knew you weren't truly gone, and I had to get back up and find you, no matter what it took."

"Good," I nod, "because if you hadn't and you'd just let your anger and pain overtake you, that would not have been good at all. I'm glad you stood up against your anger and did what was right; otherwise, I probably wouldn't be here, and neither would Mom." I can't even imagine what that would've looked like, how that would've affected Dad. It would've absolutely destroyed him, and I am so happy he saved us when he did.

"You're right," he says with a seemingly forced smile as he wraps his arm around me and pulls me close. "You are absolutely right, Nova Susan Song."

"Of course, I could still sense a lot of anger in you during the rest of the memories," I admit, "specifically from what the Silence did to me…what they turned me into. A freaking supernova; a literal one! They planned for me to use that energy to destroy you, exactly like a supernova would destroy planets in its path! How effed up was that?!" I still can't believe they did that to me—to an infant! That was so sick and twisted, and the worst part is that it may not be able to be reversed. For all I know, I may have to be like this for the rest of my life.

"Oi!" Dad frowns at me. "Language, young lady!"

"Chill, Dad!" I frown back at him. "I didn't say the actual word! Not this time, anyway." How would he have felt if the Silence had done the same thing to his Regeneration Energy? I'm sure he'd think it to be effed up too.

Steering back on track, Dad admits with a sigh, "Anyway, going back on what you were saying about the supernova, I don't disagree. In all honesty, I'm still trying to figure out how they managed it. The machine they were using exploded before I could examine it."

"Yeah, I saw," I nod, remembering seeing that happen in the memory. "That genuinely creeped me out. But I have to say, what creeped me out the most was when you almost shot that soldier in the face. I thought for sure that you were going to do it. I sensed that you were thinking about it. If you had, I…" I pause, shaking my head. "I-I-I don't know what I would've thought, but I'm so glad you didn't. That was really scary."

I feel my eyes suddenly flood with tears just thinking about what Dad would've looked like if he had shot that soldier. I seriously doubt I would be able to look at him the same way ever again, even if he was doing it for me. This thought immediately reminds me of that time on my very first trip with him to Contraxia when I almost killed the multi-eyed pirate for killing him, but I had decided against it at the last second. I wonder that if I actually had killed that pirate, it wouldn't have felt satisfying, and I remember sensing how unsatisfied Dad felt when he thought about shooting that soldier in the memory, knowing it wouldn't have done anything to bring me back; it wouldn't have saved me. From watching that memory, it seemed like the exact same thoughts were going through Dad's head. Admittedly, I am incredibly thankful that Dad ultimately decided not to shoot and, instead, found another way to save me without bloodshed, even though I'm fairly certain that soldier and many others died in the explosion after Dad and everyone else escaped.

"I'm sorry, Nova," Dad says, hugging me tighter. "Looking back, I never should've shown you that particular memory. Please forgive me for scaring you."

"It's okay," I say, shaking my head. "I get it. You were angry at them for what they did to me and to Mom; you couldn't help it. You wanted to get back at them, and at the time you thought that was the only way; you weren't thinking. Thankfully you changed your mind at the last second and chose not to shoot, and that makes me happy." I sigh, choosing to admit the truth about the pirate. "To be honest, I felt the same way back on Contraxia. After that pirate killed you, I thought about shooting her in the face as well to get back at her for it, but in the end I chose not to, thinking it wasn't going to make things better; it wasn't going to bring you back to life or anything. If anything, it was just going to make things worse, and I knew I'd regret it afterwards, and I was right. Ever since my mother-guardian took my place at the Silence base, I learned that violence is never the answer. Walking away is better…that is, if you don't have the right words to say."

Dad smiles, hugging me again. "Well said, Nova. Well said. That's one of the things I've been trying to teach you for a while, and you're beginning to master it; in fact, at this point I'd say you already have. You really are your father's daughter. I'm so proud of you." He kisses me lightly on my forehead a second later.

"The problem is," I say discouragingly, "I still think I haven't quite mastered my 'other' abilities—you know, the ones that make me 'Deviant.' I still don't quite understand what that means."

"It means you are very special," he replies.

I roll my eyes at this. "You keep saying that, but how does it make me 'special?' From what I remember you saying about Deviants, they were considered dangerous, hence why they were taken away and kept away from the rest of society, sometimes even executed, depending on how powerful they were. Do you think I'm that powerful—so powerful to the point of me being dangerous? Kovarian seemed to think so, especially with the added energy from the supernova. She claimed that my Deviancy was a 'bonus' and that she was planning for me to use it for many things…things that I don't even want to think about."

I instantly remember the nightmares Dad had of this happening to Adult Me, and these nightmares were what led to him choosing to give me up, hoping that he could prevent the nightmares from happening in real life. Could these nightmares still happen now that I'm back in his life? It seems like we still have yet to see evidence of this, now that I've been back for a while, and I am honestly not remotely ready to see this in action.

"I'm sure it's nothing to worry about," Dad assures me, though at the same time he doesn't sound very sure. "You didn't seem to have a problem with your 'extra' energy growing up."

"No, but sometimes I could feel it," I admit. "That there was something else in me besides my Regeneration Energy. At the time I didn't know what it was, but it made me afraid, and it especially scares me now that I know the truth. Now that I know how powerful it is—I mean, you saw the Regeneration—what's gonna happen to me in the long run? What if there comes a time when I can't control it like I can now? During our past adventures, there were times when I used my energy to defend myself by shooting the energy out of my hands and severely harming those who attacked me, and at the time I didn't know what I was doing or even how I was doing it. You were there for some of them; you saw how I handled them. I can make weapons and things explode with my energy, much like a supernova would when it comes in contact with a spaceship or planet or whatever. Even Hazel said my Regeneration Energy exploded out of me like a supernova. What if I end up harming someone the next time I regenerate?" What if the next person I harm is you? I think but do not say, feeling both of my hearts quiver in fear.

"Calm down, Nova," Dad says as he rubs my arms soothingly. "As I said, you don't have to worry about it, at least right now. We'll figure it out later…together."

"Do you think there's a way of getting rid of the star's energy, or do I have to live with it for the rest of my life?" I can't help feeling nervous. I seriously don't want to be a living supernova for the rest of my life, but I honestly feel like I don't have a choice, since the Silence seemed to make the added energy a permanent part of my physical being, and not even Regeneration can get rid of it; if anything, my Regenerations seem to make me more powerful every time, like I'm becoming an all-powerful, indestructible goddess or something.

"I don't know," Dad shrugs again with a sigh. "Again, we'll figure it out together. Don't worry about it right now. You are perfectly fine and perfectly safe."

"Yeah, for now I might be 'perfectly fine and perfectly safe,'" I sigh dismally, "but I won't be like that forever. That's my point."

"Nova…" Dad sighs again, but I don't want to hear it.

Instead, I groan as I bury my face in my hands, feeling my anger and frustration overwhelm me. Of course, I wouldn't be feeling like this if that witch and her twisted band of psychopaths had just left well enough alone, but they just can't be bothered to leave Dad alone while he remains alive. It infuriates me that the Silence insist on tormenting our family, knowing that at this point that's the only tactic they have left to bring Dad down, since all of their other tactics failed to work because he continues to outsmart them, whether it'd be with a duplicate of himself—like at the lake in Utah—or whatever else. I figure the Silence will continue to threaten and torment us until Dad relents and agrees to die like they want. Of course, Dad would never agree to die, so the only option we have is to keep on the run from them and take down any Silence sickos that do find us. This thought makes me wonder how many members are left after the explosion at the Silence base, including that mysterious cloaked boy who aided us around the base.

"Moving on," I say, shaking my head, "I still have a burning question. Actually I have two burning questions, but my first one is: who was Nolan? That little boy you met who seemed to be guarding me…who was he? He said his mother told him to protect me at all costs, especially from you, but who was his mother? Was it Kovarian? Or did she kidnap him from his true mother, just like she kidnapped Mom, and made him think she was his mother?" I pause, my main focus centering on the cloaked boy. "Could he have been that cloaked boy I met at the Silence base?"

For all I know, it could make sense, especially if Nolan had been with that sick hag since that time Dad saved Baby Me. Perhaps Nolan grew up to be that mysterious cloaked boy at the base, even though he seemed eager to help me and the Paternoster Gang, despite his determination as a kid to kill Dad and anyone associated with him; admittedly, that 'she's gonna train me to kill you one day' line still gives me chills. I wonder what changed the boy's mind if he was, indeed, Nolan all grown up. I wonder if he somehow survived the explosion as easily as Kovarian had and is still out there, continuing his training—that is, if there is anything else to train him, even after twenty years. I even remember that so-called 'spark' we felt between each other when our eyes met for the first time and how strange that sensation felt. Would I ever be able to feel that again?

"Yes, you mentioned there being a cloaked boy who helped you around," Dad nods. "Jenny said he stepped in and saved you after you were harassed by one of the soldiers. Vastra mentioned something similar—that a 'mysterious young man draped in shadow' helped her and Strax to the Main Control Room. Who was he?"

"I don't know," I shrug with a regretful sigh. "He never told me his name when I tried asking. He only introduced himself as 'a friend;' that was it. That could mean literally anything. It definitely was weird that he was helping us go against his own 'people'…unless he wasn't really one of them. I guess we'll never find out if he died along with everybody else. Then again, if Kovarian is still out there, he may be too; maybe he was a Flesh avatar too, just like Kovarian. Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if that was the case." Admittedly, a small (like, five-percent) part of me hopes the cloaked boy—Nolan—survived so I can meet him again and find out who he really is, but I decide to keep that thought to myself.

Dad must've heard my thought anyway (annoyingly, like he always does), because he says in agreement, "I wouldn't doubt that either. Perhaps one day we will meet that mysterious boy again, whoever he was. Only time will tell." He then says, changing the subject, "What was your other burning question?"

At first, I didn't want to talk about it, but at the same time I felt like he had a right to know how he made me feel all my life, so I admit with a sigh, "Why did you make me feel alone?"

"'Alone?'" he frowns at me in seeming confusion. "Why would you say that? Of course you weren't alone; you had your guardians and best friend to support and love you."

"That's not what I mean," I say, shaking my head before explaining. "I mean, yes, they loved me, but they never truly understood what I really was and how it made me feel because of it. They raised me as a human, but that was only because that was all they knew how to raise me as; they never knew how to raise a Time Lord, much less a Deviant one. Despite being raised as a human, deep down I knew I was something else, and every time I tried talking about it with them, they would refuse to say anything and would instead change the subject; in other words, they didn't support me in the way that I wanted them to, because not only were they trying to keep the secret that I was never human to begin with, but they also didn't understand much—or even anything—about Time Lords. The only person I could talk about these things with was Hazel, but even she didn't understand what I was truly going through, even after I told her my secret. Deep down, I felt like there was no one I could trust to share these things with—no one else that I knew was like me—and it made me feel alone. That being said, my question to you is: why did you and Mom make me feel this way for so many years—for my whole life? Even while you were protecting me from the Silence and everybody else, why didn't you ever show yourself properly to me and show me I wasn't truly alone? Why did you refuse to reveal yourselves until that day in the alley? Why wait until I was basically about to die to finally reveal yourself?" Okay, so I was exaggerating a bit when I said I was 'about to die,' but I definitely felt that way at the time, and it angered me that my bio-parents only came to my rescue then—at a time when I was in the most danger. What kind of a family does that?

Dad is silent for a minute before he sighs and admits while wrapping his arms around me again and pulling me against his chest, "I'm so sorry, Nova. I didn't mean to make you feel alone. It's just… I was afraid. Afraid of what would happen if I got too close to you. I told you before that as Time Lords, we tend to unintentionally attract danger to ourselves, and I was afraid of that happening to you. That was why I wanted to protect you from myself as well. As you know from having seen my memories of the Time War, I've made a lot of bad choices in my long life, and I still do occasionally without really meaning to. I was afraid of making another bad choice and having you pay the price for it. I've had that happen to too many companions in the past, and I regret it immensely. I would never have forgiven myself if I let that happen to my own daughter. As I said in the memory, I never truly wanted to give you up, but that was the only way to keep you safe, at least until you were old enough to understand."

"Yeah, I understand now," I groan. "I just wish I'd known the truth of who you guys were sooner. If I at least knew who you were, I wouldn't have felt so alone, but I never sensed you around, which was weird since we're telepathically linked. Surely we were telepathically linked then too. I mean, we obviously were before you gave me up." My last statement makes me remember Dad's memories of Baby Me crying out of fear whenever I would sense Dad being afraid when thinking about his nightmares coming to life one day—which still might happen in the near future, needless to say.

"We were," he confirms. "I blocked my end of the link. Again, I didn't want you knowing of my existence and connection with you, thinking I'd put you in danger because of it. Again, I'm sorry. Your mother and I truly loved you; we really did."

"I know," I say, smiling up at him. "I saw all those memories of you guys watching me. I still can't believe how many memories you have of me, but they're memories I don't even remember you being there. I hardly ever remember seeing you at all, and even if I did, I guess I allowed myself to forget. It makes me feel kinda bad, to be honest."

"It's alright," he smiles back as he rubs my arms. "The feeling is mutual. It made me feel sad as well, but deep down I knew that one day we would meet again. We would finally be together again as a family, and nothing was ever going to keep us apart."

"Yes, and I am so happy to be back," I say honestly. "I never ever want to leave." Only an idiot would want to give up a life like this—a life with all of Time and Space as one's backyard.

"I wouldn't dream of it," Dad says as he cuddles me close, and I hug him tightly back. "You are seared onto my hearts always, Nova Susan Song…now and forever." I smile at these words—words I've heard a million times since the beginning, and words that I never ever want to stop hearing.

After a few minutes, I say excitedly as I pull away, "Now, how about we go to one of those places you promised you'd take me? I was thinking that marketplace on that planet you told me about in the memory—'Vincent' or whatever."

"Vintosis," he corrects and agrees. "And yes, I was just thinking that myself. I was thinking a little break from training wouldn't hurt."

"Same," I nod. "I could really use a break. Hopefully we don't get caught up in anything too crazy there." It'd be nice to have a proper vacation for once, where we're not hunted by people that want to kill us for the most ridiculous reasons. Why can't we be normal tourists for once?

"Well, if you're ready to go," Dad smiles as he prepares to get up from the sofa, "then I say we should go."

"Yes, let's go!" I say as I get up with him. I suddenly pause, thinking of that silly word he used in his memory before diving into danger, and add with an enthusiastic giggle, "Geronimo!" Dad laughs as we both run off to get ready for our next adventure.

A/N: I know it must've been a bit confusing to put the prequel after Part 1, but after reading the epilogue, now you should understand why I put it after Part 1 (hint: it's to do with this chapter). I've also mentioned in the past that the prequel could be read as Part 0.5 (of course taking place before Part 1) or Part 1.5 after reading the epilogue since the story included memories from before Part 1 being shared after Part 1. Hopefully this all makes sense now :)

Also, for anyone confused about Kovarian's scenes in the "good man goes to war 2.0" chapter, these were not included in the memories (since obviously the Doctor nor River were present for those scenes). I just included those scenes for the sake of the story.

Thank you for all who have subscribed to the series and have also been following since the beginning :)

As always, friendly reminder that kudos, comments, and favs are appreciated and will keep me motivated to post more often. I see that many of you are reading my works but not subscribing, favoriting, or commenting on them. I always encourage feedback from my readers and enjoy reading about my readers' favorite moments. I'm sure everyone has at least one favorite moment. Please, please, please share them! I would love to talk about them.

Also, friendly reminder that I tend to have a major habit of rewriting things, so be sure to check back every once in a while (maybe even reread the previous chapter or chapters) to keep up to date on any changes I may make or add.

See all of you next time in "Part 2: Discovering" :)