"I guess it's finally time we got some rest..." I stretch after we finally finished our food. Canned food isn't exactly my thing, but after walking around a tunnel for hours and fighting Reid I would probably eat a rat.
Shaula, who's mouth is a mess from eating like a animal, smiles. "You guys must have prepared really badly for this, yep. Didn't bring food, didn't bring water, didn't bring clothes... This is why planning is important, yep!" Well, we didn't have time to plan anything, considering we got teleported here...
Felt sighs and then glares at the scorpion. "Yeah, you're totally right Scorpion Big Sis, this is absolutely our fault." Her words are dripping with scarcasm, though I'm not exactly sure she should be directing all that towards Shaula.
We don't exactly know how directly involved with the prophecy she is, and so it would feel kind of bad to direct our anger at the scorpion... But then again, she did threaten to kill us if we broke something, or left.
Shaula scratches her nose, a cocky expression on her face. "Ah, I'm glad to see you recognize your mistakes Shortietwo, yup. That's how you grow and evolve, yep!" She then giggles. "Please keep taking the advice of your big sister to heart, yep." Yep, yup. What a weird little... quirk she has.
Felt smirks. "Ok then Scorpion Big Sis, the next advice I need is guidance back to our rooms!" That would be nice, this place is sort of confusing. It's like a labyrinth of doors in a way, even if Shaula has only taken us to the pretty ones.
I can't help, but wonder what is on the others. This is the tower of the sage, so surely it is full of weird and interesting shit. Still, we cannot exactly choose to wonder around with Shaula here... Probably, I actually have a question now.
Shaula gives her a thumbs up. "Okay, I'll guide all my little ducklings to their nest, yep!" That comment has made me think of Shaula as a mother, which is scary. "Honestly you guys... I mean Shortie couldn't even open her food, I had to do it for her." Ah, that's true...
Anastasia is already pretty weak normally, due to whatever condition she has, but after a day without food or water, while she's constantly walking... Opening a can was sadly beyond her. We would have obviously helped her of course, but Shaula did it first.
The merchant blushes. "Geez, I'm tired ya know?" She then picks up the empty can and analyzes it. "Gotta say though, this thing is pretty interestin'. Just how old was this food anyways?" Of course one of the world's greatest merchants would be interested on this.
Well, I have no idea on how long food can last inside of a can, and I think it also depends on the food... And Shaula also said it was enchanted. So I'm guessing the food we just ate was old as bricks.
Shaula scratches her chin, lost in thought for a moment. "Well, around four hundred years, yup." Even though I expected that, my face still morphs into surprise. It makes sense since this place was built to contain the Witch of Envy, but... holy shit, almost half a millennium.
Anastasia looks back to the can, stars in her eyes. "I need to make more of this." Scary, maybe we shouldn't let a super greedy merchant wander around in the sage's home. Next thing you know she's gonna be selling magic nukes.
Priscilla smirks, it's a mocking one. "I suppose one of your stature would be interested. This is no more than food for commoners, with no passion or heart." Of course you of all people would say that! Well, I do agree it isn't exactly great... But we were starving.
Anastasia's eye twitches. "Why in hell must ya bring everythin' back to luxury? Can't ya enjoy somethin' simple for once." I doubt you liked the canned food either! Don't lie, you just want to make money!
Felt nods. "Yeah cow, just be thankful we actually got to fill our stomachs with something." Priscilla, being thankful? Sorry, but if she said something like 'thanks for the meal' I would rightfully assume that a tunnel shapeshifter replaced her.
Shaula whispers in my ear. "Hey, is she really a cow...? That's crazy, yep." I ignore the scorpion, definitely because I'm stuck in our little world, and not because her insane levels of stupidity are going to cause me brain damage if I pay attention.
Priscilla's smirk doesn't change at all. "Yes, yes, you two would be grateful simply for the opportunity to live. I for one expect better than simple survival." B-based? I think...? Honestly I can understand your point of view, but c'mon, we just got out of a death tunnel.
Emilia looks down, a blush on her face. "I'm just glad there wasn't a lot of meat on it. I don't really like it..." As expected of a elf, I guess. I'm sure you would rather be in a little forest shooting arrows or whatever.
Both Priscilla and Felt look at her at the same time and speak at the same time. "Meat is the best part in any meal." And then they start glaring at each other. If opposites attract, that would explain the hate they feel towards one another.
Shaula gasps. "You're not a fan of meat Sleepytwo!? How is that possible...! Actually I might not like meat that much too, yup." She crosses her arms and starts tapping her food. "I ate some pretty awful pieces of it this past few years." Where did you get it though? Does this place have like... a farm?
Emilia embarassingly smiles. "It's just that... I find it very chewy I guess." She nods to herself. "I also don't like hunting..." She then puts her hands up towards Shaula. "I mean, not like I had to hunt for this, but it does bring back unpleasant memories...!" Ah, now I really am imagining Emilia with a bow and arrow.
Shaula nods. "Nah, I get ya, yep. Hunting was was fun for a while, but it got boring after after a decade or two." Please stop dropping insane numbers like that. "Besides, you're already better than Sleepy, at least you actually eat at all." So Sleepyone didn't like eating? Weird.
I raise an eyebrow. "Hey Shaula, who's Sleepy anyways?" Maybe this time she will give me a conclusive answer.
She shrugs. "She's Sleepy. Duh." Nope! As expected of the woman that probably genuinely thinks Priscilla is a cow now!
My eye twitches. "I see..." And yet again the taught that Shaula is a younger sibling hits me. Though it's more like she a younger sister who also happens to be a toddler. A very stupid toddler.
Anastasia who is still analyzing the can, as if she was going to suddenly learn how to make them, sends a questioning look towards the scorpion. "Hey, where do ya even get your food anyways? This is the first time you ate from here, right?" Ah, so someone is finally asking...
Shaula shrugs. "I normally hunt a few demon beasts around the tower and eat them. There are no animals here." Badass...! I can't believe I just thought that Shaula is actually cool! That has to be a crime or something!
Priscilla glares at her. "Impossible. Don't brag for the sake of bragging girl." Isn't that your whole schtick? "I can accept commoners will eat almost anything to survive, but even a starving peasant would not be able to swallow the flesh of a demon beast." I'm sure you're exaggerating.
I kind of want to try one now... One that is cooked though. I'm sure that piece of meat that Shaula was eating before actually belongs to some demon beast around the tower... I wonder if she would go hunting with me.
Emilia nods towards Priscilla. "Y-yes... When I was young I tried eating one, even though Puck warned me against it. I was rea~lly hungry, but I couldn't stomach it at all." Ah, so maybe Priscilla is right?
Still, Emilia is kind of like that one guy everyone knows, who casually drops awful facts about his childhood, and then never elaborates on them. Seriously, she tried eating a demon beast? She was almost sold into slavery? Everyone hates her? Someone get this girl into Naruto already.
Shaula pouts. "Well, they are pretty bad, I can't deny that, yup. But they're edible... Don't make fun of them! Yep!" This may be strange of me, but now I'm kinda back in the thought of wanting to eat demon beast meat. Even if it's awful... It's a new culinary experience!
Putting food aside... "Hey Shaula, I have been wondering this for a while, but what are the rules on us wandering around? Can we just go anywhere?" It would be good to see if we can separate from her.
Obviously someone will always need to keep a look at the scorpion, to prevent her from going to see the tunnels, but it would be nice if the rest of the party had some time to plan.
Shaula makes a thinking pose. "Well... You guys can move around without my supervision, I suppose. Yep." That's a relief... "Don't go to the second floor though, and... only enter the rooms with decorated door, yup. The simple plain door are unavailable, even for me yup." That immediately makes me want to go in them.
She continues. "To be honest, I'm not allowed to go in them too. That's why Nerdy made all the places I can go with shiny doors, yep. I'm bad with brainy stuff..." I think if you need someone to specifically mark where you can and can't go... then things might be worse than just you being stupid.
Still, 'Nerdy' has been mentioned again. Considering she can give rules which Shaula must follow, that makes me think she's the sage. I could be wrong of course, but it would make sense Shaula of all people would call Echidna a nerd.
Priscilla suddenly yawns, and then a light blush appears on her face. "Scorpion, enough babbling!" Eh? I guess we are finally gonna go sleep. "Lead me to a place with a bath, these... ruffians are far too dirty to sleep near me." You're dirty too.
My face immediately shifts into disbelief. "You can't expect this place to have some sort of bath..." Does she think this is a vacation house? We are stuck in a legendary house meant to contain the BBEG of this world!
Shaula smiles. "Okay! And no need to worry about clothing either, yep! We have a place full of it, with all sizes! Yep!" What the hell!?
Priscilla sends me a smug look. "See Puppy? No need to fear baths, dogs are cuter when they're clean." I... The world really works on your favour.
"This place is nuts." The baths were even separated for genders! Why the hell did the sage turn this tower into a rich guy's mansion!? Also, my side of the bath had a hole to spy on the girls.
I will take that secret to the grave with me. And I didn't even use it by the way, and not because it would be a massive abuse of their privacy either. It's simply because Priscilla was on the other side, and she would catch on my shenanigans in one second.
And differently from anime cliches, I'm sure she wouldn't just beat me up. She would probably straight up kill me while saying something about her divine body or whatever... Some might say it's still worth it.
Honestly nothing about this place screams JRPG sage, but I guess she would live here... And of course, there's also the fact that our arrival was clearly planned. They knew a guy and his supposed harem would come here...
Priscilla scoff, and then lays down on her bed. "It's acceptable, I suppose." She glares at the sleeping Crusch. "This smell of blood is ruining everything nice I could have felt however." Ah, you can't exactly blame the sleeping Duchess for that, and besides...
Emilia looks down, embarrassed. "I tried my best... sorry." The half-elf requested I leave the room for a second, so I wouldn't see the naked Crusch, and then undressed and cleaned her. She then put new clothes on her, but... there's still the light smell of blood in the room.
Still, like Emilia said, she tried her best. I'm sure removing Crusch's armor was hell on earth for example. Besides, the fact that I left the room with Shaula probably gave them the opportunity to talk together about our eventual escape.
And speaking of Shaula... "Hey, are you going to sleep here?" I know she can't use anything that 'belongs to the challengers', but surely she has some place to sleep? Ah, the girls dragged her into the bath too, by the way.
Shaula smiles. "I'm just gonna watch you guys sleep. Yup!" She nods to herself. "I gotta make sure none of you decide to start trouble, yep." We already started trouble...! Also, I don't know if I'm gonna be able to sleep with you watching over me.
Felt sighs. "Look... Scorpion Big Sis... You can just share a bed with me, I guess." Hey, I tried to do that with you before and immediately got rejected! I demand an apology...! Just kidding of course, in fact I approve of what you're doing.
It's definitely mean and manipulative, but... if we get Shaula to like us, maybe that will give us an advantage in the future. Much like when Anastasia got Reid's interest, sure that didn't do much in the end, but he was still technically taking it easier on us.
Shaula basically jumps in one of the beds, which is now Felt's bed. "Yay! I hate staying awake through entire nights!" Yeah, no one likes that, including the poor old me that hasn't slept in more than one day.
I basically crash into my bed. Honestly Priscilla would probably make fun of me for it, but I would honestly not have minded leaving the bath for tomorrow. I'm just too god damn tired, okay!
At least we got new clothing afterwards, and clothes that are more light for such a hot place, there's one problem though... "Why me...?" Currently I'm the only one having this specific problem.
Priscilla smiles. "Oh, don't worry Puppy. Collars should be tight, so the dog can't remove them easily." I'm not talking about collars though, am I!? I'm talking about my clothes damn it!
While for girls there many, many different sizes of clothing, basically allowing all my companions to find something that fits... For me there was only one, and that size happens to be a bit too small.
I'm a tall and muscular sixteen year old, who feels like he's wearing clothes for a scrawny fourteen year old. It's definitely not comfortable, even if it's much better than my dirty clothing. It's also... badly made? The clothes for the girls all look professionally made, as if someone had bought it from an actual store.
My clothes are bad though, they feel made by an amateur. Like when a person gets something homemade from their family members, except there's none of that symbolism here. Thankfully the exception was underwear, I got the good store bought experience with that one... even if it's still too tight.
I sigh. "I guess I can't complain though, thanks for finding these Shaula." After leaving the tunnels, I expected another struggle. Insteas I found a room to sleep, food, baths, and clothing. If this is that Priscilla luck at work then... Fuck it, I'm begging her for a job once we leave.
Shaula blushes. "Oh, don't worry, yep! Your big sis will take care of any troubles as long you all stay here, yup!" You're definitely more than an ally than Reid ever was at least. Honestly with you here and all this rooms full of comfort...
It feels like a JRPG base, with Shaula being the tutorial NPC. Now all we need is for her to introduce a bunch of rooms containing convoluted methods for us to get strong... Maybe a room with fast travel too.
Suddenly Priscilla starts taking her clothing off. It comes so suddenly and without comment that I'm left paralyzed at the sight, a red blush appearing on my face. Still, I can't comment on it, because it's not like Priscilla is treating it like a big deal...!
Shaula mutters. "The non-legendary sword...!" I beg of you to shut up!
Felt points at Priscilla, her face is just as red as mine. "What are you doing cow!? Don't go undressing in front of us!" Please don't stop, I promise I'm not a guy who touches people without consent, so it will be simple a treasured memory.
Priscilla rolls her eyes. "I like sleeping with only underwear, and this place is also very hot." She then winks at me. "Worship this sight Puppy, for it is one many men have died over." They have!? I don't doubt it!
Not only am I seeing Priscilla's almost naked body, but I'm also seeing... the legendary womb tattoo! So I send her a thumbs up. "I will!" I could try faking not being attracted, but she would definitely call me out.
Emilia is covering her face. "B-but Puck said you shouldn't get naked in front of other men... or women... Or anyone that isn't him or one of the maids...!" Please don't act like you're a kid!
Priscilla sighs. "Girl... It's considered uncouth to undress one's body unless they are doing it in front of their lover or caretaker. I however simply don't care." She actually gave a fairly reasonable answer!? "Ah, but I'm simply going as far as staying with my underwear, it's up to you to decide how intimate you feel." Puck I'm sorry.
Emilia's blush immediately disappears. "Oh...! Okay then." And she too starts taking off her clothes. "Well, I guess Iori is my destined lover! So~ it's fine!" Womb tattoo! I'm seeing a elf girl with a womn tattoo!
The half-elf smiles. "I'm also used to sleeping with only my underwear, so hopefully Puck won't get mad..." She touches her hair. "How am I going to handle you tomorrow...?" Ah, so Puck usually does your hair?
Priscilla pauses for a moment. "Half-beauty, I shall help with your hair tomorrow, but you too shall carefully, and I mean very carefully handle mine. Very, very carefully!" Emilia nods, a smile on her face. I however just think about how they don't even know if this place has the tools for that.
Anastasia groans. "Can we just go to sleep already...! Enough bondin' for today!" Ah, fair enough. I would like to keep seeing heaven for a bit longer, but I am very tired...
I close my eyes, and slowly drift to sleep.
...
...
The body was strong, the soul was so very tired. It might as well have been death. It might as well have been death. It might as well have been death. What am I even doing here? It might as well have been death. It might as well have been death. I forgot.
...
...
I wake up to screams. "W-where am I!?" They're very familiar, seeing as they come from Crusch, who has decided to wake up during the dead of night to give me a fucking heart attack.
Priscilla throws a pillow at her. "Shut it woman, I'm trying to sleep!" Sometimes I wish I could understand how your mind works.
AN: And so Crusch jobs to a pillow.
Just wait until she jobs to the dick.