This sucks.

Jean grit his teeth. His hands started to shake. They were formed into fists, but the tremble remained. He kept his eyes locked on the man standing front-and-center on the stage.

Commander Erwin Smith was a formidable sight; a beacon compared to the flickering of the torchlight. The cadets below fell into shadow the farther away they got from the stage. They tilted their heads and whispered among themselves.

"He said most of us will die if we join. Why would anyone go to the Scouts?"

"But he said they can find an answer behind the Titans … do you think it's a bluff?"

"I don't care if it's true. I've seen people devoured alive … I won't put myself through that again for any prize."

Erwin looked over the crowd, the passionate nature behind his eyes being matched in his voice.

"I want all of you to ask yourself this," he said, raising his volume. "'Am I willing to give my heart for humankind?'"

A ripple ran through the crowd. Most of the cadets had trouble making eye contact with one another.

"For those of you who are willing to put your lives on the line by joining the Scout Regiment," Erwin said, the steady, more familiar, nature to his voice returning. "… remain here." Erwin scanned the crowd a final time before he turned to walk offstage.

"Those of you who will be joining other regiments are dismissed."

There was no delay. Backs were turned as cadets dissolved into the night. Jean spotted Annie from the corner of his eye. Her expression was stoic as ever as she stepped away.

Damn, Jean thought. His boot shifted, but he stopped himself before turning around. He felt like a boulder in a stream - countless faces passing by as he stood his ground. Shoulders brushed past his, causing him to faulter.

Come on, you made up your mind! You're joining the Scouts. You're risking your life because … because …

Why?

There was no reason. He didn't care about seeing beyond the walls; he didn't want the fame of being known as a Titan killer. There was no guarantee he could do any good. No one in particular stood out in his mind who he wanted to fight for. Why couldn't he just join the Military Police and–

"Jean."

Jean turned his head. He went pale.

"Marco," Jean said. His friend was standing beside him, a pleasant smile on his face as if nothing were amiss.

"W-what," Jean said, finding his voice. "What are you doing? Why are you still here?"

"I've made my decision," Marco said. He placed his hand on Jean's shoulder. "I want to do my part to help find answers; I'm joining the Scout Regiment."

Jean took a step back, aghast. "You?! Are you serious? All you ever talked about was joining the Military Police!"

"Yeah," Marco said, looking away. "That's … I know my family will be disappointed. But after everything Commander Erwin said … how could I not? It wouldn't feel right for me to stay within the walls while my friends are fighting so hard to help everyone. If anyone didn't come back … all I could think about was what I could've done to save them."

"You're not some damn martyr!"

Marco took a step back in surprise. He raised his arms in a placating manner when Jean reached out to roughly grab him by the collar of his jacket.

"You keep throwing your life around as if it's nothing!" Jean said, nostrils flaring. "Didn't you hear what Commander Erwin said? There's a good chance most of us who join the Scouts will die … but the ones who don't will come out as elite soldiers. I don't … I don't have any intention to die! I'm going to make it out the other side. You won't, Marco; not because you can't, but because you don't think you deserve to."

His grip on Marco's jacket loosened. Jean ran a hand through his hair as he made a frustrated sound. "You said I know how to assess a situation and adapt – so that's what I'm doing now. I'm looking at the type of guy who has what it takes to make a weakling like me feel strong. Because of you, I feel like I can join the Scouts with no intention of facing an imminent death. And because of me …"

Jean held out his hand. Marco hesitated, but clasped it in return.

"… because of me …" Jean continued. "... you can do what you're good at and inspire those around you to do what's right."

"Jean," Marco said. He shook his head. "I appreciate your insight – I really do! But if you think I can encourage others to fight for humanity's sake, then wouldn't that talent be better suited for the Scouts?"

"Don't misunderstand my words," Jean said. He folded his arms, eyes narrowing. "I never said you inspired others to fight. You inspire them to do the right thing – like rushing off to rescue Engineering Corps members who were trapped when we'd all but resigned ourselves to die. You weren't telling us to go out in a blaze of glory – you were telling us to help others even if we felt helpless ourselves. And as nice as that is Marco, when we're outside the walls, the same rules won't apply. There won't be any innocents who need protecting out there. Being in the Scouts means you're expected to look out for yourself if the situation gets messy. Your sort of selfless thinking will get you killed before you can be of any use to humankind. So, I ask you to let a selfish weakling like me act as your blade outside the walls while you protect those that are here."

Worry etched over Marco's features. "Jean … If you're really doing it … if you're going to join the Scout Regiment, then I–"

"Then you'll join the Military Police in my place and live out my ambitions," Jean said.

A calmness washed over Jean he couldn't explain. It may have had something to do with him finally coming to peace with his decision. Seeing someone who deserved to be in the Military Police more than anyone put into perspective where Jean really belonged.

"You're going to make sure the police stay on the straight and narrow," Jean said. "You'll inspire them to make choices that'll help everyone. You get it now, yeah? We're both going to do what we're best suited for. I'll promise not to let you down if I can ask you to do the same."

Marco looked away in thought. He sighed and turned back to Jean as a weak smile grew on his face.

"I know any squad you'll be assigned to will be in safe hands," Marco said. "You coming out the other side as an elite warrior … I can see you there, Jean, and you leading others along that path. I promise I'll do my best to keep up on my end."

Marco took a step back, raising his head to meet the gaze of the few cadets who remained. "That goes for everyone, too! You all can do what I can't beyond the walls, so I'll do everything I can to keep your loved ones safe while you're away. Allow me to give you the peace of not having to worry if they'll be protected while you're gone. Put all of your focus on fighting for humankind! You have what it takes to come back from every mission … and I'll be here to greet you when you do."

"He sounds like an eager housewife," Conny mumbled. Despite this, a smile crept up his face and his eyes wandered to meet the gaze of the person at his side. He and Sasha shared a nod, turning ahead to face the stage.

A hearty clap on the back brought Marco's attention back to Jean.

"I'm leaving things up to you now, Marco," Jean said with a lift to his chin. "Get out of here, and watch me become someone you can really admire."

"I can't say I haven't already seen it," Marco said. His warm gaze shifted when Armin stepped around Jean.

"Good luck, Marco."

Marco accepted Armin's outstretched hand with gusto.

"And to you," Marco said. "You'll have to tell me about everything you see out there."

Armin nodded, eyes alight. "Thinking about what's out there is sort of frightening … but I still can't help but feel excited. I'll make sure to come back so I can share it all with you."

Mikasa approached and gave Marco a pat on the shoulder. A friendly nod was exchanged between the two before Marco turned away. Jean watched his friend take a few steps, stopping dead in his tracks when his path was cut off.

"Good luck."

Reiner stood in front of Marco, extending his hand. There was a split second of hesitation before Marco accepted it. A line formed between Jean's brows as something suddenly seemed off about Marco's posture.

"You … both of you," Marco said, turning his head to acknowledge Bertholdt as he stepped beside Reiner. "You'll do fine out there – stay safe."

"Same to you," Reiner said. He and Bertholdt kept Marco in their sights as their former squad mate made his retreat. Their eyes remained locked on his back, the pair still as stone.

"What the hell is going on there?" Jean said, voice low. "They get in a fight?"

"I'm not sure," Armin said, his expression mirroring Jean's concern. "Marco hasn't mentioned it, but he's not the type to talk about that sort of thing."

"Yeah, I know," Jean said. The sound of Erwin's voice grabbed at his attention. He sized up Reiner and Bertholdt a final time before looking back to the stage.

Erwin had returned to stand front-and-center before the remaining cadets. He looked out over the crowd that was now only a fraction of what it once was.

"All of you here …" Erwin said. "... if someone ordered you to die, would you do it?"

Jean lifted his chin, straightening his back. "Hell no! I'm not here to die!"

Erwin smiled. The expression looked almost unnatural.

"I see," he said. "I like that look on your faces. Then effective immediately, I welcome all of you here as the newest members to the Scout Regiment!"

"You're limping," Annie said.

"Is it obvious?" Marco asked. Upon Annie's insistence, they were taking their morning run along the path looping around the lake. It was obvious now why she'd requested the easy footpath clear of any obstructions.

"It's really not bad," Marco said. "My, uh … my sister kicked me."

Annie didn't speak, only raising an eyebrow.

"I was the last one to walk out during the ceremony," Marco said. "She thought I was thinking about joining the Scouts; I told her I almost did. That's when she kicked me."

"Your sister has anger issues," Annie said, her attention turning forward.

"I think she was worried about me," Marco said with a chuckle.

"Being worried doesn't give her an excuse to attack you," Annie said.

They passed the bench marking their third loop around the lake. The pace was slower than usual, but Marco was happy to find his stamina had been improving since he'd started meeting with Annie nearly every morning to go on a run. In theory their height difference should've meant he could easily outpace her; in practice, Annie could still lap him a hundred times over.

"You need to be able to stand up for yourself," Annie said. "Our orientation is in a few days – the others are going to walk all over you if you act like you do now."

Marco deflated. "You think so? I don't mind if others ask me for help, though. If they trust me to–"

"That's not what I'm saying," Annie said. She was generally unexpressive, so getting small glimpses of her showing emotion was almost like a treat even if it was for something negative. In this case her lips puckered in irritation.

"If you want to make a difference," Annie said. "You have to earn respect. People need to know you're not someone to be messed around with."

Marco was quickly feeling like he was getting in over his head. "You mean … I should fight them?"

"I know you're not stupid," Annie said. "Please stop acting like it."

"Ah! Sorry."

"Don't–" Annie sighed. "How about this – tell me someone you respect."

"Oh!" Marco said. He looked forward, frowning in contemplation. "I respect Jean a lot."

"Do you respect Jean because you're afraid of him?"

"No," Marco said. "I don't think Jean would ever try to hurt me or any of our friends. I respect him because he's able to make split-second decisions that are usually the right ones. He can bring people together and have them move toward a central goal. Even though he's confident, he's not conceited enough to shut out other's opinions."

Annie nodded. "You respect him, and it has nothing to do with being physically intimidating. You can be that way too if you set your limits."

"I suppose," Marco said. "How do I … do that?"

"Be like you are now," Annie said. "But when someone asks you to do something you don't want to, say no."

"That's it?"

"Yes."

They jogged in silence for a few minutes. Marco eventually put on a determined expression.

"I thought it over," he said. "And I'm not going to do that."

He smiled at the glare shot his way.

"I don't want to be the type of person who says no when someone needs my help," Marco said. "Maybe that'll lose me respect and have people taking advantage of me, but I'd be fine if it means my actions make a positive impact on even one person."

"You're hopeless," Annie said.

"Thank you, Annie," Marco said. "I know you're only trying to look out for me. I hope we'll be able to work together once we're assigned into new squads."

. . .

'I hope we'll be able to work together once we're assigned into new squads.'

Marco waved to Annie over his shoulder. The cheerful wave was returned with less gusto as Annie watched Marco jog down the winding path exiting the park. His figure was swallowed up by the trim hedges, Annie remaining in place as she regarded the spot where he'd been.

'Keep him in your sights, Annie. He could ruin everything if we made a mistake.'

Guilt squirmed in Annie's gut. She turned away.

"I agree," she said.