My ears twitch, the sound of water drops splattering against the wooden roof breaking the comfortable silence of the room. I don't particularly like the thought of rain at the moment, but I suppose it's not as bad as it could be, as long as it's out there and I'm in here. There's a type of serenity to the dulled sound at least, coupling well with the warm bunch of fur and fluff, the girl silently resting in my arms. Motionless and uninterrupted, with the occasional bout of shuffling and noise, so delightfully peaceful, when she's sleeping at least.
I enjoy watching her, even if it feels weird to admit to myself, it's nice to see her look so at peace, even for a short moment in her life. It brings such warmth to my chest, one that I can't seem willing to let go of, like a determined fire that sits in my chest. Heh, that sounds kind of weird, even experiencing it myself. I don't know if I mean to or not, but I normally think of the heat and cold when it comes to this stuff, maybe I'm more sensitive to it, it feels ironic given how I react to some fire. Maybe it's just fire that's magic based rather than one that's ignited by something more natural, literal or otherwise. God knows that I still love that feeling at least, it's a nice respite from the cold sometimes. It's not very fun being reminded of fire most other times, I swear I can still smell something burning, the stench stuck up my nose, clinging to the inside of it. The abnormal chill that seems to linger under my skin might alternate between being a bothersome feeling to a reluctantly familiar one, but this warmth is always welcomed.
The fact that the cold and anxious squirming in my guts seemed to have disappeared is a small but thankful favour, even if I feel like it's only just for now, helps keep it focused on what's happening so I can enjoy it rather than worrying, rather than having my thoughts filled and split between so many things. Oddly enough, I still can't feel Adrian in my head. He's far from a stealthy bastard, and I certainly can't feel him wriggling around in the back of my skull. Still, I'm not sure whether or not that counts as him being 'awake' or just staying quiet and thinking. I'm not willing to yell at him to force him to pop up, the bastard would probably just start gagging over this again.
The squirming in my arms brings me out my thoughts, the sound of her squeaking yawn filling the air, a soft sound that's barely audible over the thudding of the rain. I pull away from her as I look down, a small smile pushing its way onto my face, gently ruffling her hair. She mumbles and purrs, sluggishly pushing her head into my hand. Her eyelids slowly flicker open, golden eyes foggy and unfocused.
"Morning kid, sleep well?" I ask with a soft smile and a low tone, hand trailing from her hair to behind her ear. She doesn't respond immediately, sniffling and suddenly looking down, as if groggily checking over herself through a hazed mind while she mumbles aloud. I grunt in surprise as she nails the middle of my chest with her forehead, ignoring my hand entirely. That's, well, kind of odd, and worrying. "Are you okay Mabel?"
"M'fine." She finally responds, her already quiet voice muffled, hands clutching at my shirt, clenching and unclenching repeatedly. It doesn't exactly sound like everything's fine, and I can feel my heart twist and turn in my chest as she shakes her head, mashing it into my chest, her body and movement stiff. Definitely far from fine. The smile on my face feels a little bit harder to keep up as I wrap my arms around her, resting my hand atop her head.
"Alright kid." I don't exactly need a gut instinct to know that somethings up, but forcing it out of her wouldn't exactly help her feel better, would it? She lets out a gentle sigh as I run my hand through her hair, fingers splayed out and lightly massaging the back of her ears. She stiffens for a moment, mumbling under her breath before slowly relaxing, the grip on my shirt loosening as her body sinks into the bed.
"..sorry." She mumbles after a while, my ears straining to hear her voice over the crashing of the rain above. I raise an eyebrow, even though she can't see it, stomaching down the nervous beating of my heart as I'm able to. Now's not the time.
"Why are you sorry, kid?" I ask her in turn, voice as low and soft as I can, my hands still massaging the back of her head. She's silent for a moment, ears straining to hear her quiet breathing.
"I dunno, I feel… bad, I think." She finally responds with a sniffle, shaking her head and mashing it into my chest once more. God, I wish my heart would calm down for a moment, I feel like it's gonna beat out of my damned chest. "M'sorry…"
"Kid…" I whisper to her as I pull away, hand trailing from head to cheek, running a thumb against it while I pull her sight upwards. Her golden eyes twinkle in the dark of the room, face marred by confusing, the girl tilting her head and nudging into my hand. At least she doesn't look like she's on the verge of tears at the very least, I imagine she's more confused and conflicted than anything. She's just a kid, odds are she's been a slave since birth, how can I fault her for being in such disbelief now that she's been given some semblance of freedom and affection, especially when she's near humans? "I don't know how you feel, not exactly, but I can assume that this is because I'm looking over you like this, right? I'd give this and so much more should you need it, because I want to help you. I made a promise, and I want to stick to it"
I'm too stubborn to break a promise, willingly anyways, I'm not sure if she's realised that or not. If there's one thing that I might've been right about in the past, it's that my words don't mean much if I don't prove myself with action, especially when it's about Mabel. God, even thinking that makes me gag, gross. A stopped clock is right twice a day I guess.
The girl sniffles again, humming aloud as she continues to push her cheek into my hand, the warmth from her fur encompassing my hand.
"A-aren't you sick of me, aren't you bored? Why are you still, you know..." Her questioning trails off towards the end, her eyes darting away for a moment before looking back to me, she sounds so genuinely confused by it all, almost frustrated. God this conversation's really doing in my heart, isn't it? Does she really expect me to discard her so soon after meeting her, she thinks I'm bored? The blood in my veins turns cold as she continues to stare, the brilliant gold in her eyes marred by a misty cover.
Son of a bitch, this is not what I thought this morning would be like.
"Mabel…" I still keep my voice low as I continue to caress her, the warmth that surrounds the both of us competing with the cold that lingers in my limbs. I shift my hand to the back of her head and bring her closer, wrapping my arms around and squeezing lightly. The sound of the poor girls whimper is almost torturous, even if it's only once, turning into repeated sniffling rather quickly. She might be keeping it down, but I can still feel the wetness seeping into my shirt. I don't mind it. "I don't keep you around for my amusement or anything, I keep you here because I want you close, I want you to have the chance to be more than what they wanted for you. Regardless of that might be."
I hold her close for a while, the girl taking in deep breaths of air between sniffles, running my hand through her hair, I want to do something to try to soothe her after all. The sniffling dies down eventually, as does her laborious breathing, the only sound between the two of us being the din of the rain above. If anything, it sounds almost heavier than before, there's not a chance of me going outside today. Even though she sounds a little bit better than before, she sometimes stiffens up, her voice hitching before shuddering. I keep her close all the same, dragging the blanket above the both of is, occasionally humming whatever tune comes to mind, something to help keep her mind off of it all.
"I h-had a dream." My ears twitch as she pipes up, her voice muffled by both shirt and blanket, the hitching feels painfully apparent. I hum in acknowledgement first, trailing a hand up and down her ear before resting it on her head once more.
"It wasn't a very good dream, was it?" She both nods and hums in response, the girl dragging her face across a dryer part of my shirt.
"N-no. I d-don't like those dreams."
"No one would, Mabel." The question of whether or not she wants to talk about it isn't something I want to ask, sounds like a somewhat awful idea. I don't want her to burst out into tears again, the sound of it still feels like a knife to the heart. I don't need to know the specifics of it to know that it hurts her even now. "It's over, it can't affect you here. I won't let it happen here."
"D-do you think so?" She wriggles in my arms and looks up to me, shining eyes and head tilting to the side, ever so slightly. A small smile claws its way onto my face, brushing my hand over her head.
"I know so, I promise kid." I lean down and press my lips against her forehead, ignoring the feeling of fur while I ruffle her hair. I hear the girls embarrassed sounding squeak, snickering internally and pulling away after lingering for a while, looking down to her with what I pray to be a soft expression. The pink that colours her cheek is fucking adorable, as is the smile on her lips, a far cry from the sadness, and it's one that I can't help but love. "I'm too much of a stubborn fuck to break promises, you know that, right?"
To my delight, the girl giggles and nods, planting her head back into my chest. I smile and ruffle her hair once more, embracing the warmth and softness gleefully. I freeze for a moment and blink, pursing my lips together, though I still keep my hold on her. I totally swore in front of her again didn't I? I really should work on that, at least in front of the kid. Anna would have my head.
I hum and shake the thoughts away, lips curling up into a smile as I massage an ear of hers, gently rubbing it between a thumb and a finger. She seems to take to it well enough, thankfully. It's rather peaceful now, the cacophonous sound of rain is… rather pleasing, actually, even if the thought of seeing it in person feels less so.
Hm…
"Hey, kid?" I pipe up as I look down to her, breaking the peaceful silence. She lets out a questioning sounding hum and looks up in turn, tilting her head. "Do you like the rain, by any chance?"
"The rain? I think so, I haven't heard or seen it very much, but I think I like it!" Her response sounds so cheery, so upbeat and lively, and the beaming grin on her face is lovely. It's almost like she's brushed off before, and so soon too. Those thoughts and fears of hers might come back sooner or later, but I'll be here to help.
"Do you wanna go see it right now? It sounds kind of heavy at the moment, but I'm sure that you could get some front row seats to it" It might've ruined whatever plans I could've come up with today, but I might as well make some use of it. If she wants to, of course.
"Okay!" I blink, stunned for a moment at the immediate response before chuckling, ruffling her hair. That's a pretty strong yes, then. That's just, that's really cute, dammit girl.
"Well, better get up and outta bed then, right? After you had breakfast, though. I'm not letting you skimp out on food, whatever the reason might be." I lightly boop her nose with a finger, snickering as it crinkles upwards, the girl giggling and nodding in response. "Thata girl"
I pull myself away from her and slip out of the bed, wincing and grunting as I stretch my limbs, the sound of bones cracking filling the air. It doesn't exactly sound like the healthiest thing to hear, but it feels good at least. Mabels already hopped out of the bed herself, her tail swishing side to side as she almost skips around the room, her head turning to face me with a wide smile on her face.
I spare a glance to the pile of belongings that's still laid up against the wall, from the stack of books to the messenger back, my sight lingering on the sheathed blade specifically. It doesn't feel as bad to look at the thing, if nothing else, so maybe I did do something right. Hopefully. Might as well grab her scarf, it'd be cold out there, right?
"Zeeeeke." Mabel's small whine brings me out of my thoughts, turning away from the pile, wrapping the purple scarf around her neck before planting my hand atop her head.
"I'm here, you know you could go on without me, right?" It's just Anna's house, and the both of us are more than welcome to roam around, though I still feel bad for wandering into her room, even if it was to check up on her.
"I know." She chirps in response, pressing into my hand as she stands to my side. She just doesn't want to then, I assume. The kid's too cute for her own good, honestly. A small snort of laughter pushes its way out of my nose, ruffling her hair as I waltz over to the door.
I'd like to say that I have a good feeling about this morning, other than the start of it, but I'd rather not jinx myself.
…..
After looking at it in person for more than two seconds, I've decided that I don't like the rain, not in the fucking slightest. Leaning against the frame of the open door, I glare outside with a furrowed brow, the deluge of water pouring down from the sky, turning the dirt into sludgy mud. The dark clouds loom above us, rolling across the sky, the sun blotted out by the thickness of it. How does the weather go from sunny to this? Is this normal around here?
I'm also annoyed that it happened today, I actually wanted to see Edward. I wouldn't force the man through this weather though, and if he did come, I'd beat him dry again for doing it.
"Don't like the rain, kid?"
"Fuck no." Fuck this rain, fuck it straight to whatever version of hell's in this god damn world. I feel Annas glare in the back of my head, my cheeks burning as I mutter a quick sorry, the response there was probably a bit too snappy. I purse my lips together before raising the cup to my lips, taking a small sip from the steaming hot tea, relishing in delight as it travels down my throat. At least I have tea to help soothe the anger, thanks Anna.
"Mabel sure seems to, though." She says with a soft titter, I can hear her shoes clack against the wooden floor as she moves behind me, a small smile on my face as I turn my sight down from the clouds towards her. The girl barely managed to scoff down her food before basically throwing herself out the door, the bright grin on her face persisting even now. Her hands cling to the wooden railings on the porch, claws gently prodding and gigging into it as she leans over it, tail swishing from side to side in a furry blur. The girl jitters with excitement, her nose just barely out of reach from the drenching rain, occasionally stepping from paw to paw. It looks as if she's entranced by the rain, and that itself fills my heart with warmth. It helps that her tail wagging kind of looks like something an over excited dog would do, it's fucking adorable, and the white tip of her tail makes it look as if it's a brush.
Hm, I wonder if she'd like art, painting specifically. That sounds like something kids would like, right? It's something to keep in mind at least, just as an extra activity for the girl to do, is it expensive or anything here? I don't exactly know much about art, and I don't really know anyone who does do art. Actually, that's not entirely true…
A shiver runs up my spine, though I do my best to not show it outwardly, the sip of the tea turning into a gulp, ignoring the burning sensation that clings to my throat. I'm not even gonna entertain the thought of Eric and her meeting, if I can help it anyways. I'm sure the man is good at heart, or at least as good as a man perverse as he can be, but I don't think either of us would be comfortable. I hope the man's well, if nothing else.
"She does, and I'm certainly glad that she likes it." I finally mutter in response, shaking those thoughts from my head, a smile returning to my face. God, I'm really glad that she likes it, even if I hate the thing. It's a damn good distraction from this morning, girl deserves something as a treat.
"You've been doing alright with her." That certainly comes as a surprise, humming aloud as I turn to look back to her. Her side's turned to me, her attention taken up by the dishes. I've tried to convince her to let me help out, even a little but, but the woman's rather staunch in her stance about it. Can't say that I know why, but it's her choice I guess.
"You think so?"
"It's not as if you can do much worse." That at least gets a snort of laughter out of me, even if it feels somewhat sour in my throat.
"I aim to do much better." And nothing's gonna stop me from trying. I see the corners of her mouth twitch upwards as she nods, an approving one at that. I'm still not sure if I'm doing all this amazingly well, but I'd rather try and fail and learn than never attempt it at all. If she approves, then I'm on the right track, right?
Fuck, this still isn't what I expected would happen when I came here. Don't know if I can complain or not though.
"Any plans for today kid?"
"In this weather? Fu- Probably not." I feel sweat bead on my forehead as she glances towards me out of the corner of her eyes, a swift warning glare before looking back to the sink. Shit, better not let her know I've been doing that around the kid. It's not like I'd have plans to do anyways. But, if I'm stuck here for the time being… "Hey, do you still need help with whatever you're doing?"
"Hm?" She flicks the water off of her hands before standing upright, turning towards me with a tilt of her head. "You want to do it today? You know you don't have to, right?"
"Yeah yeah, I know, I already feel a fair bit better today, I just needed some time to process and fix some things." I roll my eyes and wave my free hand dismissively, taking another gulp of tea to go along with it. Don't want it getting cold or anything. "I'll be fine, probably anyways, depends on what we're doing and what you need help with."
"I did offer to tell you about it, but you snubbed it off, kind of like what you're doing now. I'd be free whenever today, to be truthful, though I'd prefer if we did it sooner rather than later. "
"Sounds like a plan then. Honestly, at this point, I'd rather just let it all be a surprise. We're already doing it today anyways."
"You concern me, kid." She lets out a good natured chuckle as she waltzes over to me, laying a hand on my shoulder and squeezing gently, a warm smile on her face. I give her a smile of my own before looking away from her, quickly checking up on the girl. She's still enthralled by the display, a hand of hers slowly stretching out to the rain. I hear a quiet yelp of surprise before she pulls her arm away, waving her hand wildly and flinging water elsewhere on the porch, the fur on her mattered and wet. I snicker internally as I step outside, the girl's golden eyes switching from her hand to me as the wood below creaks, the bright smile on her face returning once more.
"Like the rain, huh kid?" I plant my hand atop her head, ruffling it gently, peeking out to the curtain of water beside us. God, I can feel how cold it is from here, the hair on the back of my neck standing on end. So much water, why does my gut twist and turn so much? I know I'm not afraid of water in general, I'd love to hang out by the sea until I'm sick of the salt up my nose, so why does the fucking rain worry me?
"Mhm!" She answers with a rapid nodding, pushing her head up and into my hand while pressing into my side. I push down the discomfort in my gut down as far as I can, my smile widening as she shows off her toothy grin.
"You really really like it?"
"Yeah! It's, I dunno, it's cold and stuff, but it's nice!" That makes one of us happy to be here, kid, but I can't really be upset when I'm around a delightful smile like hers, can I?
"Then I'll make sure you get to see it like this as often as you can, if you want to."
"Really? A-are you sure?" Her head tilts, golden eyes shining with that childish excitement of hers. Well shit, how can I say no to that face?
"Of course kid." If it's something she wants, I'll very damn well fucking get it for her. The girl's victorious sounding squeak of joy fills my ears, even above the din of the rain beside us, warmth spreading throughout my chest and limbs as she clings to my side, her arms wrapped around my waist and squeezing tightly. I ruffle the top of her head, even as she shifts it around, pressing her cheek into my side to stare at the torrential scene.
I might as well join her in watching it all, right? I sigh to myself as I look away from her, raising the cup to my lips and downing the rest of the tea. So much for drinking it before it went cold, huh? At least it tastes nice, even if it twists and turns in my stomach. I blink and shake my head ever so slightly, my vision blurring as the chill inside revives itself, gut twisting and turning.
Red drips from the sky in a red haze.
I grit my teeth together with a grim determination, burrowing my hand into the girls hair and carefully tending to it as best I can, banishing the picture from my way my blood boils at least fights with the chill in my guts, forcing it down and beating it there. I'm not gonna let that fuck with me, not when I'm trying to spend time with the kid, it can go straight to hell. The feeling of the kid shuddering against me brings me out of my thoughts, I can feel the tips of her claws poke into my flesh. I look down to the kid, her small frame shaking and fruitlessly pressing further into my side for warmth, her bushy tail wrapped around my leg. Shit, I don't exactly have my cloak on hand, and her little scarf isn't exactly gonna beat the cold back.
"You're looking pretty cold, wanna go back inside?" It's not really a question that needs asking, but I might as well ask anyways, right? The answer comes pretty quickly in the form of her mashing her face into my side, nodding rapidly before looking up to me. Bloody golden eyes, it's going to kill me some day. I kneel beside her and scoop her up in my arms, snickering a little as she squeaks in surprise, her face pressing into the crook of my neck, her arms wrapped around the back of it. "Wanna do a little reading, kid?"
"Mhm." She mumbles into my neck with a little nod. I waltz into the house with a grin on my face, closing the door shut with my paw. Anna sits at the table, pinching the bridge of her nose as she shakes her head, though there's still a smile on her face.
"I assume that I'll be seeing you in a little bit?"
"Naturally. You don't mind, right?"
"It gives me time to prepare I suppose. Get to it." She motions with her head towards the door, smile still lingering on her lips. I give a small nod and walk past her, dropping the teacup onto the table before moving on towards the room. It takes a little bit of fiddling and bending of the knees to get the door open, too stubborn to put the kid down, but it works in the end, closing the door shut with my paw, just like before. I waltz over to the bed and gently place her atop the bed, the girl shuffling around into a seating position. She doesn't shudder nearly as much as before, must already be feeling a fair bit warmer.
"Do you want me to pick out a book, or do you want me to choose?" I ask her, my hand already softly pressing into her ear. She hums for a moment, lips already in a soft smile, half lidded eyes looking up to me.
"Can you?"
"Of course kid." She giggles as I ruffle her hair, pulling away from her and walking over to our belongings and kneeling. I rummage through the stack of books, flipping through the lot of them. Shit, I'm not exactly sure which one I should choose, something colourful I guess? I eventually yank one out from the pile, dangling the cover towards the girl. "Have you read this one?"
"Nope!" That's perfect, then. I move back towards her, a bright beam on her face, legs dangling off of the front of the bed. She nudges into my side as I crack open the first page with a hand, spare arm already wrapped around her.
"I'm here if you need help."
"I got this!" Ah, such a confident reply! I can't help but ruffle her hair some more, the girl taking the book from my hands into her own. "In the le-light of the moon, a let...little? A little egg lay on a leaf."
Warmth and pride fills my chest and heart, holding her close as she flips the page, eyes squinting as she reads over the word. Every step forward is one that fills me with pride.
That's my girl.
…..
"So, what's going on?" The door closes behind me with a familiar sounding click, my neck twisting to look around the woman's room. It's a lot less cluttered than before, books and papers properly shoved into the bookshelf, bed neatly made and tucked in. Her desk's still somewhat cluttered, bits and pieces of crystal line the wood in an almost uniform fashion. I still don't know why she has so much of it, but I assume that I'm gonna find out real soon.
"Take a seat first kid." She responds, motioning towards her bed with a hand. I take my place on the bed, gently seating myself, trying not to disturb the sheets. She takes a seat opposite to me beside the desk, grabbing at a random bit of rock. She holds it up in front of her, rolling and twisting the rock in her grasp. I don't really know much about what counts towards the quality of a mana crystal, but it doesn't look too different from my own, although it's on the smaller side, dull light flickering in its insides. The look on her face is… I'm not sure what to think of it, it looks as if she's apprehensive about all this. Is this little experiment that dangerous? "I assume you know what this is, right?"
"It's a mana crystal, I know how they work." Kind of anyways, I can still recall what I've learned from Lucy, though the bits that I can immediately remember. "What do you need me for, though? It's not like I know much about it."
"It's a bit of a long explanation, especially if I'm going to talk about the specifics of it all, I just need you to keep an eye on me while I do my business with it. There's a reason I haven't exactly tried to do this myself, safety reasons mostly. I don't expect things to go poorly, but it's better to be safe than sorry." I nod as she finishes up, humming to myself for a moment. That sounds easy enough, even if there's a small bit of worry for the potential for something going to shit.
"Is there anything specific that I should look out for?"
"Just anything that starts to seem off, I know you don't know much about magic, but I want you to follow your gut when it comes to this." I purse my lips together, but nod anyways. That's not really much information to go off of, but I'll try at least. Anna looks oddly sad about it all, closing her eyes shut as she sighs, a long and soft one at that, clapping her hands together around the crystal. "As much as I'd love to do this alone, this is going to take a lot of concentration to try to pull off. Are you ready?"
"Whenever you are." Why is she asking me if I'm ready? She's the one that's actually doing something. Why is it that something about this situation feels so so wrong? Is it just how serious she's taking this? I bring myself back into reality as wisps of blue creep up the woman's sides and covering her hands, slowly bringing them apart, the crystal encased in a magical vice. It stands upright, straight as an arrow and unmoving, even as blue wisps shift around the thing. I'm not really sure what I'm meant to be looking for, nor what she's meant to be doing, but I'm all too glad to help if she thinks I can. I'm less glad about snubbing off the chance to be told about what this is about, maybe that wasn't exactly the wisest decision, but I've already made my bed.
Seconds pass, then minutes, each moment feeling longer than the last. It seems as if whatever she's doing is a slow process, her hold on the crystal firm and stiff, her face twitching every so often. I shift a little on her bed in an attempt to feel more comfortable, though I don't take my eyes off of the spectacle. It looks… rather pretty, actually, but it's best not to get distracted by the light show. The woman lets out a heated sounding sigh, her brow furrowing as the magical thrum that surrounds her flares up, the crystal shuddering and shaking in her grasp. Why does she have a mana crystal anyways? I don't recall humans normally using the things, only keidran, seeing as that's the only way they can actually use magic, so why does she have so many on hand? Is she trying to force it open or something, to see its insides?
That doesn't sound right, mana crystals aren't the most fragile things, but I'm willing to bet that it could be cracked open with enough force. So why does she keep on trying to push into the thing? Fuck, I feel something niggling at the back of my skull, an answer that's just out of reach, I swear I can almost fucking feel the thing in my hands. I can see the sweat bead on her forehead, hands shaking as she takes in a deep breath. Despite the exhaustion that I can see on her face, nothing seems out of place.
Mana crystals have to be formed somewhere by something, right? Is it made from the magic that runs in the earth, do dragons have something to do with it? Dragons do exist here, right? I'm fairly sure anyways, it's a fantasy world, so why not?
I blink, and everything clicks, just for a moment. Is she trying to force magic into the crystal to recharge the thing with magic? I know that they can eventually be worn out and crack, would it be dangerous to use at that point? Humans have to draw magic from their surroundings, Templars being an exception to the rule because of the towers, they can draw from there whenever they damn well please, but would this even work with only one person? An uneasy feeling rises up in my chest as I continue to look over her, something about this seems off. She did say to follow my gut instinct, but is that warranted when I know I'm a bit paranoid around magic that isn't my own?
The crystal shudders and shakes, the light inside flickering for a moment with a bright shine. I blink as it sparkles, jaw loosening as I stare, disbelief and excitement rising in my chest. Holy shit, did she actually do it? That's, that's amazing! I think so anyways, has this been done before, is that why she has an idea on what to do? God, the Templars would have an aneurysm if they found out that this was possible. I'd pay to see the Grand Templar's reaction to it, bloody bastard.
A dull cracking noise fills the air, instantly snuffing the excitement. I don't need to examine the crystal for very long to notice the beginnings of a crack forming at the top of it, shaking almost violently as it trails further downwards. Ah, fuck.
"Anna, I think it's time to stop." I call out to her, my voice rising as I raise a hand to shield myself from the blue light. She doesn't hear me, the light growing ever stronger. "Fuck, Anna!"
Calling out to her does nothing, of course it doesn't, why would it go right? Calling again does fuck all. Fuck, I should've called this off when my gut told me so, god dammit! I squint through the gaps of my fingers, it's hard to see the crystal through the blue sheen of light, but I can still see the shadow inside it all.
I can feel the creep of fear fogging up my mind, the thoughts inside racing, fuck, what the fuck am I meant to do here!? I-I have to stop this, I know I do. She said that this requires a lot of concentration, right? I just need to break the connection somehow.
I imagine that there's a better way than trying to yank the stone away from her, but it's the best I have at the moment. I squeeze my eyes shut and push myself off of the bed, squeezing my eyes shut and forcing myself to move forward. Despite how close she's meant to be, it feels like it takes far too long to push myself through, waves of pulsating magic washing over me.
It feels disgusting, I hate it, loathe it, fucking magic. Even though I can't see where it is, I can certainly feel the thing. I reach out and grasp for the thing, meeting nothing but air, swiping my hand from side to side, in any attempt to feel for the stone. Eventually I feel a sharpened tip brush past my fingers, the rest of my hand following suit and grabbing at it. I can feel the tips dig into my skin, the magic that washes over it feels as if it's scorching the palm of my hand.
But I refuse to let go. I tighten my grip on it, gritting my teeth through the pain, tugging and pulling and yanking at the rock, anything to get it away from her, anything to stop the fucking connection. My hand shakes as I dig my paws into the floor, the shaking feeling travelling up my arm.
There's a loud pop, and the wave of magic finally stops. My eyelids fling open as I gasp for air, I didn't even realise I was holding my breath. Anna's holding her head in her hands, groaning aloud, a palm almost violently massaging her temple. I look down to my shaky hand, the mana crystal reduced back to its dim light, thankfully there's no blood or any sign that my arm's worse for wear, despite the way it felt to grab at it. The throbbing pain that feels like it echoes inside my bones kind of hurts, but it's fading at least. Holy shit, what a fucking mess. My heart feels like it's gonna beat out of it's chest, and I'm fucking exhausted.
"Are you alright, Anna?" I finally ask with a wheeze, looking up to face the woman. She continues to groan, her eyelids flickering open, her eyes unfocused for just a moment.
"N-ugh, nothing sleep won't fix, I've been through this once or twice." Her voice seems worryingly soft, a wince crossing her face as she rubs at her temple once more. Despite her pained look, she sounds rather blase about this, her lips tightly pursed together.
"You weren't kidding when you said it took a lot of concentration, huh?" I try to make light of the situation with a half hearted smirk, trudging my way back over to her, hand already outstretched to hand over the dulled stone. I certainly don't want it in my hands anymore, and the wave of exhaustion that washes over me helps with that thought.
"Yeah, I haven't pushed that hard for anything experimental in years, and I don't think that it's a good idea to do that again, not without help." She sounds as tired as she looks, the crows feet that line her eyes seem more pronounced as she dejectedly sighs. Thankfully she takes the rock off of my hands, haphazardly tossing it onto the desk. "Are you alright kid? I'm used to being worn out after things like this, but if I got you hurt…"
Ah, well I'd feel like shit if she was worried about me for too long. She's done more than enough for me,
"Listen, I'm fine Anna, see? Not a scratch on me." I respond after a moment, a cocky grin on my face as I show myself off. It's not entirely wrong, there isn't a physical scratch on me, and my heart rates already dying down. There only thing that's left is me being real fucking tired. "Are you gonna be okay?"
"I'll be alright kid, don't worry about me, I'm not gonna keel over and die from a headache at old age." She still sounds really tired, her eyelids drooping ever so slightly. She's hiding it well though, I don't think I look much better either. "I assume you wanna know what that was all about?"
"You were trying to stuff magic into the crystal, weren't you? So it could be used again, I assume you got the idea from the towers that the Templars have?" I answer swiftly, clenching and unclenching my hand, the remnants of the throbbing pain still lingering.
"...yes, actually, I'm a little surprised you figured that out so quickly. I thought you didn't know much about magic." I can't help but feel a little insulted by that, and her surprised expression and tone doesn't help the matter.
"I don't, but I remember a little bit more about the towers than I should. I have some memories of them when I was a templar. I can occasionally sound smart, give me some credit." I say with an indignant sounding huff. I know I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed, but still. Wouldn't be the first time I sprung that information on someone. "What's the reason for it, though? As interesting as it is, that only really benefits the keidran, doesn't it?"
"Yes, yes it does." Her voice is clear and clipped, her stare almost icy cold, her eyes shifting away from me.
"Why, then? If they find out..."
"Atonement" The air feels so cold, so stiff and unwelcome, her face a hardy stare. She finally lets out a soft sigh, rubbing a finger against her temple. She looks so old, so tired, it hurts my heart to see. "I told you already kid, I've done things that I'm not proud of, for people I can't help but loathe the thought of now. I was young and headstrong once upon a time, doing things for human pride. That was years ago, I can't fix what I've done, but I can try better now."
"That's why you're so forward about me helping Mabel, right?" She gives a grim nod, the air feels a bit more solemn than cold now at least.
"You have a second chance kid, that's something some people would kill for. You'll have to deal with whatever you've done in the past, but you can try to make it better now rather than years in the future." She sighs and closes her eyes, as if in deep thought. My lips dip into a frown, the tips of my finger twitching. I feel as if I should hug her, do something, but I don't want to disturb her.
"Anna…" She shakes her head slightly, eyelids flinging open, lips curled upwards into a warm smile.
"Don't worry about me too much kid, just, try to make the right choices that you believe in. There's nothing wrong with taking other people's advice and all, but there's a very fine line there."
"Saying not to worry about you doesn't exactly make me not worry about you, you know that right?"
"Obviously, how do you think I feel whenever you say that? Part of me wishes that I could at least pretend to be young and dumb again." The air feels a little bit warmer, the two of us chuckling just that little bit. It's a small thing, but it's enough to nudge away the depressing feeling that dampens the atmosphere. "Thanks though, I don't think that I'd have gotten help for that, it's been on my mind for a bit."
"Can't you ask people from town for help? I imagine that Gerome would be willing to help." To my surprise, the lady laughs at me, a short bark of laughter, but still. It's not that much of a ridiculous suggestion, right?
"Gerome would, but he doesn't exactly come this way very often, never met a man who loves his job as much as him. You know how I'm seen by the people there, right?"
"...maybe? I don't really know for sure, are you not liked or something?" I ask with a tilt of the head, raising an eyebrow. I can't imagine why not, she's a nice woman, I don't see the problem.
"I'm seen as the crazy ex Templar hag that lives on the edge of down in the woods, I don't exactly get visitors. You'd probably get looks for living here and all, but that'd come with not exactly being human." She explains with a giggle, a teasing little smirk on her face. I let out an awkward feeling chuckle, rubbing the back of my neck. Is she really seen like that? She doesn't look like a hag, nor does she act like one, a bit weird, but I've seen weirder. "Thanks for your help though kid, I do appreciate it, even if it was a failure this time around. There might be some chances in the future, but it'll be slow going"
If she does have to do this alone, then it would be pretty slow, wouldn't it? It technically worked for a moment, the crystal was recharged, it just almost exploded. Is there a way around that, or is that inevitable if someone tries to do it alone?
...hm.
"Actually, I could try to talk to Lucy about helping you with it. I dunno how the towers work, but I imagine that they have more than one person pumping magic around." I pipe up, tapping a finger against my cheek. She does like her 'experiments', and they did get along well enough last time.
"I suppose you have a point. She's a rather pleasant young lady, I wouldn't turn down company, do you think that she'd accept?"
"If I'm the one asking, then I can't imagine her denying." A shiver runs up my spine, pursing my lips together as I stare into the floorboard. She still unnerves me, though not nearly as much.
"Then I simply have to meet her then, don't you think?" She giggles again, I'm not sure if that's because she's genuinely excited or because she likes to see my squirm. "Thanks for your help though Zeke, I mean it. I think you have someone to get back to though, hm?"
A fair point, as she always is. I smile and nod, giving the woman a lazy wave before turning my back to her, leaving her to her devices. The door clicks shut behind me, squeezing my eyes shut and letting out a silent, but long sigh.
That was a complete fucking mess, but it turned out alright, I think. It could've been worse, a lot worse. I feel a frown crawl its way onto my face as I hum, twisting and turning to move back towards my room.
Where the fuck was Adrian? Normally the bastard would be screaming at me, but he's been really quiet today. It's almost worrying, is he still asleep, can he shut out the world that much to think? I shake the thoughts from my head and enter the room, I'll find out the truth sooner or later.
The rooms dead quiet, with the exception of the rain and Mabel's gentle breathing, the spot she takes up on the bed rising and falling steadily. That exhaustive wave washes over me once more, stifling a yawn that threatens to force itself out of my chest as I waltz over to the bed. The tired feeling smile is one that I willingly allow on my face, sleeping in under the sheets, a cocoon of warmth surrounding me. She mumbles and shuffles in her sleep before falling silent once more.
I wrap my arms around her, holding her close, my mind slowing to a crawl.
I won't let the past take away the present, or future. I'll fight tooth and nail for them all, for her.
Authors note: I'm not entirely sure if I'm happy or not with this chapter, but I guess it's good enough at the moment. I'll be sure to re-read this given the chance, I'm just kind of tired at the moment, but I'll say whether or not there's been changes in an update. Have a good day.