I rap my knuckles against the door, lightly drumming it down the wood. The door looks somewhat warped, as does the porch itself. It looks and feels sturdy enough despite that, wood as thick as my wrist ought to be.
It sounds the part too, knocking on it gives little more than a muted response. Perhaps more force is required so it can actually be heard, unless they're not home to begin with. Lyn would've told me if they were going out before she took off with my kid, right?
'Hey, stop pussyfooting. All you're doing is riling yourself up.'
Right, sorry. I knock again once, then twice, with a bit more force for good measure. It certainly sounds a good bit louder than before.
"Just a moment!" A voice calls from inside, faint and airy, muffled by the wood.
"No rush." I respond, mostly to myself, digging my hands back into my pockets. My lips dips into a frown as I turn away from the door.
The sun's long begun to set, already dipping into the horizon. A gentle breeze dances along the air, I can feel it twisting and curling against my fur.
No rush at all, I wasn't aware that I spent so much time with Lucy. We got to the inn not too long after mid-day, right? Must've spent longer than I realized talking to her about it all, and waiting around for her to rummage through her books.
Confusing and worrying, but at least it turned out better than expected. Another wave of weariness washes over my body, a yawn threatening to push its way out of my throat. I goran instead, raising a hand and running it over my face.
God, I'm tired. Sleep might not bring any true rest, but I do long for it.
The sound of hasty footsteps brings me out of my thoughts, as muffled as it may be, my attention and sight returning to the door once more. There's a muttering from the one behind it before a click rings out, the doors hinges squeaking aloud as it's pulled open
A familiar face pops out from the crack, blazing red hair cascading down her face, full lips curling up into a loving smile.
"There you are hun! I was wondering when you'd come around." She says, pulling the door wide open. She's changed out of her uniform into more casual wear, a white tunic hanging loosely off of her shoulders, brown trousers held up by rope. Her hairs loosened to a messy ponytail, dangling around her neck.
"I'm sorry for taking so long to get here, I lost track of time." I apologize to the woman, rubbing the back of my neck as I do so, an awkward feeling squirming in my chest.
"It's alright hon, I don't mind it in the slightest, and neither does Felicity." She says with a chuckle, and a smile. It's a warm one, and it puts my feelings at ease, at least a little bit. She steps out of the doorway, the door swinging just that little bit more open as she does so. "They're just outside the back at the moment, why don't ya come in hon?"
"I wouldn't want to intrude." I also wouldn't want to have them waste more of their time because of my request, either.
"It's not an intrusion if you're an invited guest, dear." She retorts quickly. With a giggle and a wink, she turns away, stepping deeper into the house.
She's real insistent about it, I'd only feel worse if I turned it down now. I sigh to myself, somaching the feeling and stepping inside the home, closing the door shut behind me.
The door leads into a small room, it looks to be a conjoined space between what's meant to be a kitchen and the living room, judging from the shelves, the table and the chairs. Books and other scraps of paper lay atop the table though. Two more doors line the wall to the left, I assume that's for their bedrooms.
It's a very small, constrained house. Despite how it looks, it feels like a welcoming place. Pieces of poorly drawn art hang on the walls, the scent that hangs in the air is a concoction of things, from cooked food to an earthen one, and that general human smell. It's a homely, welcoming place.
And that's the rub with it. It's not just a house, it's a home, and that word brings an entirely different meaning to it. Stepping into the home further, I only feel more out of place. I'm used to feeling out of place, from reality to dreams, but never in a place that's felt so safe.
"Thank you again Lyn, I mean it, I don't want to be a bo-"
"Oh none of that dear." She cuts me off with a tut, a finger raised to her lips. Though it's not pressed against mine, I act like it is, pressing my mouth shut. "Your little one is a friend of my darling daughter, and from that, you are a friend of mine. Besides, you seem like a trustworthy type."
"I can't imagine how." I reply, raising a brow as I continue to stare. It sounds remarkably naive.
'It is, it's also someone you'd say and do, with your reasoning being far worse.'
The hell do you mean by that?
'Magi brothers, Lucy, Edward? Do I really need to go in detail with those lot?'
Got me there.
"Call it a hunch, hon." She says with a wink, a coy little smile on her face. "And the words of others, with loosened lips, filtered through gut feeling and reasoning of course."
"People talk about me?" I query, body tensing ever so slightly. The thought unnerves me enough, acknowledgement of it being real more so.
"Naturally. It's a small town, people know each other and talk, especially when someone new wanders in."
"Anything notable?" I pry a little, shuffling on my feet. I knew that people would notice me, but I hope that they'd have gotten used to it, or ignored me. She hums, a finger tapping against her chin.
"Nothing really. Some good, some bad, some rumors and most mean nothing." She continues, though the smile on her face dips a little. An attentive woman in a small town's bar probably hears a fair bit about what the townspeople think.
Huh, I never really gave it that much thought. She's probably a smarter woman than she lets on, smarter than myself when it comes to this.
"Do their words influence your opinion?"
"Not as much as you'd think, though small things do catch my eye." She waltzes over to the table and picks up a book, running her thumb over the cover. It looks familiar, though I can't exactly say how. "Bought slaves aren't usually taught to read, after all."
Ah, right. That must've slipped my mind recently.
"So I've heard." I say with a shrug, hands digging deeper into my pockets. I honestly forgot about that for a good bit, whoops. Not like it matters anyways, I wouldn't have listened to it regardless.
"It was quite the surprise to see little Mabel doing so, and helping Felicity with it too." She continues, the gaze on her face turning soft. A proud warmth blossoms throughout my chest, my lips twitching into a smile.
Thata girl.
"She's a very smart girl." Probably smarter than I was when I was her age. Can't say that for certain, but it's hardly a stretch of the imagination.
"Does she have a teacher to match?" She says with a slow, soft chuckle, slipping the book underneath an arm.
"Nah, he's a bit of a dunce. The kid makes up for most of it." I scoff. Honestly, I'm lucky she picked up on it so quickly. I can't imagine I'm a good teacher of anything, though I can at least help guide her through certain stuff while she picks up the rest, especially if it's something I can do.
God help me if she wants to learn how to write things, she'd be better off learning from anyone else. I fucking hate quills, loathe them, I wish these people would hurry up and create pens already.
Fuck, I'll do it myself if I have to.
"I wonder if her teacher knows the legality of it, to teach a slave to read, among other things." She continues, pacing around the table, picking up the test of the books. There's more than a good handful of them, did she read them all? "It's been outlawed for a good while at this point."
"I imagine that he doesn't particularly care about those laws." I say with a shrug. I wouldn't know the laws here to begin with, but I can probably make general assumptions with it. "It doesn't seem very well remembered among certain people though, perhaps it's something best left forgotten."
Not that I'd know who those groups are, just certain people. Eric seemed like a nice person with Kathrin, despite his general perversion, odds are that he taught her a few things, it's more than probable that reading was one of it. Her idolization of the man had to have come from somewhere.
'I doubt that it'll be reciprocated, unrequited love is quite unfortunate though. Is that why you remembered the girl before other things, hm?'
Blow it out your ass, we didn't meet that long ago. I hope they're doing alright though.
"That's not an opinion willingly shared without confidence. The Templars grip only tightens with time, and there are always those who're itching for more power or leverage, even if it requires using another. Even if they were once close." Her full lips dips into a frown, though it only lasts for a moment before disappearing. I can't help but wonder why she seems so talkative about all this, is she trying to warn me? Test me?
"I'm well aware, though I've been fortunate enough to meet people who aren't quite like that, present company included."
"Oh? What gives you that idea, hon?"
"Call it a hunch." I say with a smirk, and a wink. I can use that line too, woman. She's silent for a moment before giggling, stuffing the rest of the books underneath an armpit.
"My, you're quite the figure, aren't you Zeke?" She says, a coy smile on her lips. She makes a motion with her head, towards the back door. "Cleons watching over them out the back."
"I'll have to give my thanks to him then."
"He's not exactly the most talkative man, but he's a darling in his own way." She pauses for a moment, her lips twisting ever so slightly. "I do hope you two at least get along, if nothing else."
That's not quite what I expected her to say, something about her words catches me off guard.
"Is there something wrong?" I ask, raising an eyebrow. She hums, but shakes her head after a while.
"No, he's just… rough around the edges, but it'll be fine, I'm sure of it." She responds, a polite smile on her face. It doesn't look like she's willing to talk anymore about it.
From her hesitance, I have an idea of what she might mean, but little more than that. I give her a nod before moving over to the door, the thing creaking as it swings open.
The back of the house isn't much of a backyard, little more than an open field with a tree planted in the middle of it. Study branches hang off of its thick trunk, adorned by green leaves. I can also see the two small ones chase one another, that purple scarf trailing behind one. The sight alone roces my heart to sing with happiness, I can feel a grin creeping its way onto my face.
She's here! Of course she would be, Lyn said she'd look after her, after all. It was just paranoia, that's all, nothing more and nothing less.
I don't believe she can see me here herself, too enthralled in the moment, bright eyes twinkling in the setting sun and a wild grin across her face. I can hear her laughter, mixed with the sound of the other.
She looks happy, so very, very happy. I adore it, though it brings a heavy feeling to my chest.
A grunt brings me out of my thoughts, my neck snapping to the source of the noise. A man sits alone, slouched over in a chair while next to an empty one, near bald with a barrel chest, shirt and pants made of cloth. He stares at me for a moment before giving the chair a soft boot, closer towards me.
"Thanks," I mutter, taking the invitation in stride and sitting down, rummaging through my skull for the man's name. Surely Lyn must've said his name before. "Cleon, right? I don't believe we've spoken much."
"Mn." He responds with a grunt and a nod, his voice still sounds as if he gargles rocks, leaning back into his chair soon after. I follow suit, though the seats are far from comfortable, crudely put together and made entirely of wood, it'd be rude otherwise.
I sit with the man for a while, silence only broken by squeaky laughter.
'Well, this is awkward.'
Awkward? I hum to myself, fingers drumming against my thighs. I wouldn't say that, it's hardly a roaring conversation, but it doesn't feel that awkward.
'That's because you're too focused on the kid over anything else.'
Can you blame me? I've only seen her look truly happy a scant few times, including this moment. It's something to be cherished.
Sparkling eyes of gold and a delighted grin stain my mind.
My chest tightens. She's happy here, isn't she? She has a friend to socialize with, a roof over her head and a bed to sleep in, she has food to eat until she's bloated.
She's happy here. Who am I to take her away from it? Because I feel that I'm needed elsewhere, because the feeling in my chest dictates that I can't remain here for long?
My lips twist into a frown, as does my heart.
"How long have you had her?" His question brings me out of my thoughts. I blink before turning to face him, going through my mind once again. I had her a bit before leaving Wreathwood, didn't I? Couple in the few days of travel, the days of resting and general inactivity...
"Two or so weeks, give or take a few days." I answer. Perhaps it's not completely accurate, but it's close enough.
"Bought her yourself?"
"Mhm." Is all I answer with. It's not as if he'd share the same sentiment I do in regards to that mess, and there's little point in being needlessly aggressive. I don't feel the compulsion to flinch as strongly as I used to, nor the feeling of anger mixed with shame, but it bubbles up within me all the same. The thought of it still rubs me the wrong way, maybe a while ago all of those emotions would've squirmed its way outside of my gut, but I can stomach its acidic taste now.
I wish it'd change, that this world would change, desperately so. Realistically speaking, I can't force it on such a large scale, I can only help what I have on hand and with what few individuals are in reach.
"How much?"
"Two gold pieces."
"Worth it?" He raises an eyebrow. His tone doesn't shift, but I'd hazard a guess that he's surprised.
"Worth more." He stares for a moment before his eyes shift away from me. I do the same, looking over to the two myself. "Thanks for looking after her for a while."
"Don't mention it." His voice is ever gruff and clipped short. I tap at my legs again.
I wonder if this is what Lyn meant by him being 'rough'.
"You don't like our kind very much, do you?" I ask. I admit that it's an assumption on my part, though I'd like to confirm my own suspicions if nothing else.
There's a difference between keidran and basitins, of course. But to someone who already hates one, what's the meaningful difference between the two?
Neither are human, why bother making the distinction.
"No." He answers, eyes remaining glued onto the kids. I hum to myself, that's not surprising really.
"Ah. Did Lyn convince you then?"
"Nope." His immediate answer piques my interest, my eyes switching from the duo over to him once more.
"Really?" I ask, raising an eyebrow.
'Why are you looking a gift horse in the mouth? Are you trying to make this worse?'
Because I'm curious now. I'd expected him to be fiercely against the thought of a keidran being near his kid, not to permit it.
"Mhm."
"Any particular reason?"
"Felicity wanted to, she's got her mother's determination," He answers with a gruff… chuckle, I think. I guess he finds it amusing. It's also the most words in a sentence I've gotten from him. "You expect more?"
"I'm not sure what I expected." I say, rubbing the back of my head.
"Told her I don't approve, told her the risks," He continues with a shrug, arms crossed over one another. "If she gets hurt, then she'll learn. If not, then it's fine."
"That sounds like a rather hands off way to look after a kid." He stiffens for a moment, eyes narrowing. Ah fuck! "N-no offense! It just sounds odd to me, that's all."
'Successful foot in mouth moment.'
Shut your face. He's silent for a while longer before his glare softens, just a little bit, the man letting out a hissing exhale.
"You're new to this, I won't fault you for it." He continues. His voice sounds oddly soft, or at least as soft as it can sound for him. "All kids are different, with their needs and wants. Felicity doesn't want or need me to coddle her, so I don't. I'll help if I'm needed, nothing more."
"Ah, I see." I suppose I can somewhat understand the thought process, even if it still sounds off to me. "I'm not sure if I could do the same."
"Mn, I figured you'd be the type. Too soft, too nervous." Silence falls onto the two of us. I turn my attention back to the two, the trail of purple remaining still for the moment. I wonder what they're up to.
I want to say something, to get that niggling feeling out of my chest.
Maybe this is a little bit awkward, hm.
'No, you don't say? Watching you stumble your way through this conversation is giving me second hand embarrassment.'
Hey, it can only get better from here then, right?
'It can absolutely get worse! You stop that!'
"I made a promise to keep her safe," I begin, tapping my fingers against the wooden frame. "So I do what I can to keep it that way. She's been through enough already, I don't want her to feel any more pain."
"It's a kid, they're gonna get themselves hurt one way or another." There's a twinge in my chest, I can feel my claws scratching into the dirt below. I don't like the thought, nor how it pushes my heart into panic. A snap comes from the man, as well as the crackling of air. I turn my head to look over to him, a small flame dances at the tips of his fingers.
A shiver runs down my spine, a flush of heat tingling beneath my skin. That also puts me on edge. I try not to look at it, and instead the thin, white stick held in his spare hand. The tip of it ignites, the brown stuffing within burning along with the paper, a familiar smell filling the air as he dispels the flame.
A cigarette? I didn't think they'd have those here. At least it took my mind off of the fire. He brings the butt of it to his lips, taking in a deep drag.
After a while, he exhales, a deep, gray smoke twisting in the wind.
"Unless you plan to hide it away until it dies." He continues, tapping the cigarette against the armrest. Ashes fall to the earth below. "If it's anything like Felicity, I reckon it won't go down well for you."
Nerves wriggle in my chest. I turn back to face the kids.
I don't have much to say to him. Or at least shit I can put into proper words.
'Hah, you're really lost here, aren't you?'
Be quiet for a bit, let me think.
'You know, she is a slave since birth, and she clings to your words like a lifeline. Command her to obey and she will.'
No, absolutely fucking not, and don't you fucking suggest that again. The thought of it boils my blood.
'If you don't want her to be a slave, then she'll have thoughts of her own, feelings of her own, wants of her own. That's what you want, isn't it? For her to be her own person?'
Yes. If I have my way, she won't follow the command of anyone ever again. She'll be herself, and no one else.
'Then with that comes the potential of her being against what you say, and what you feel is best for her.'
…what if I convince her then? I imagine I could do that, right?
I keep my eyes on the kids in the meanwhile, the two of them seem to have stopped for a moment. I wonder what for.
'Most likely, she does put a lot of stock into your words after all. But how many times do you think you could do that while keeping her happy? How many times could you do that at all? If a quarter of a quarter of your stubbornness rubs off of her in any way, it will happen. No ifs, no maybe, will.'
I stew over his words. I can feel my lips twist downwards into a frown, a sour taste festering in my mouth.
In the distance, I can see Felicity suddenly lunge towards Mabel, the tail ends of her scarf flying into the air.
Panic clutches my chest as I lean forward, hesitating for a moment, hands clenching at the armrests. Is she okay? Is she hurt, the fuck happened there?
The sound of laughter is an answer to two of those questions at least, the wraps of purple twisting on top of the other for a moment of advantage.
They- hah, they're fucking wrestling, would you look at that. Can't say I expected that. I let out a deep sigh and relax into the chair, heart thundering in my chest.
Christ, I thought she was hurt for a second there.
'She could've been. Hell, it could've still hurt a little, but you can hear her, can't you?'
She's laughing, she's having fun.
'Exactly. She's enjoying herself, even at the potential risk of a little pain.'
I made a promise to her. I don't want her to feel pain. I might not know everything she's been through, I might never know, but I've seen and heard more than enough.
'And you've made an impossible promise. If you give her the chance to make her own choices, there's always the chance for her to make a choice that'll get her hurt, whether you can see it happening or not, even if you give her warning and disapproval, she may do it anyway.'
…and if I take away the choice she makes to keep her safe from it, she'll feel hurt from me doing it in the first place. And it defeats the point of me trying this hard to give her choice in the first place.
'Exactly! I know you're a bit slow, but at least you got the point eventually. Shit, it's probably the point he was trying to make too, passing advice from one man to another.'
I let out a short bark of laughter.
'And so it clicks, finally.'
"Fuck." I finally say, rubbing a couple of fingers against the growing pain in my temple. That does make a fair bit of sense.
"Mhm." I didn't expect Cleon to add into that, nor to hear his rumbling chuckle. "Fuck indeed."
"Is that honestly why you let her over here?"
"Mhm. I told her I don't like it, she didn't care, told her I didn't trust the thing, she didn't care." I hear him shuffle behind me, I assume to shrug. "Said she wanted to anyway, so I let her, and here we are. Her mother's determination, or stubbornness. This is something she can handle herself, I'd step in if it wasn't."
He doesn't follow up on that afterwards. I can hear him take another drag of the cigarette.
What an odd man.
'Like you have room to talk.'
I don't, but still. This could've been a lot worse if he was more… outspoken, or aggressive I guess. I expected that, not this.
"Thank you."
"Mn?"
"For looking after Mabel mostly, but for the advice too." As foreign the idea sounded to me initially, I'm not too proud to discard someone's advice without mulling it over.
"Don't mention it." He finishes with a grunt. Something tells me he means it too.
I can't say I know why he's given me any help, but I'm grateful for it anyways.
I should extend my thanks to you as well Adrian.
'Eh? The hell are you on about?'
You talked me through that too, explaining what I didn't get initially, probably made all this a lot smoother than it could've been. It'd be a mistake to not thank you, too.
'Bah, don't worry about it. Takes a village to raise an idiot, but I'll do what I can.'
I don't think that's how the saying goes.
'You don't remember the saying to begin with.'
Fair point.
"You've been noticed." Cleon says. I hum to myself while I refocus my sight back onto the one in front, the fox rushing ever closer. A bright, warm grin stains her face.
My heart soars at the sight.
"Seems so." I respond, waving my hand to the fox as I push myself off of the chair. "It was nice to chat to you Cleon."
"Mn, likewise."
I kneel and spread my arms out wide as she approaches, lips creeping up into a smile.
She barrels into my chest, the force of it damn near bowling me over. I keep myself as steady as I can while she buries her face into the crook of my neck, arms wrapping following suit soon after. I do much of the same after steadying myself, curling my arms around her back and squeezing lightly.
I feel her heart beating frantically against my chest, hear her slightly strained breathing brushing against my ear. She smells of dirt and sweat. I say nothing and continue to hold her in my arms
She eventually pulls away and looks up to me with sparkles dancing in her eyes, her lips curled up into an adorable smile, one that I return gleefully. She blinks repeatedly after a moment, and the spark within dims, as if coming back to reality.
"Hi." She says plainly, flatly. I'm not sure why, but I can't help but chuckle a little bit.
"Hi to you too." I return the greeting, raising a hand and resting it atop her head. Her cheeks flare up a soft pink, as she huffs, though she pushes her head into my hand all the same. "Have fun kid?"
"Mhm."
"I'm glad." Knowing that further puts my heart at ease. She giggles, her head slipping from my hand to push it into my chest. I wrap my arms around her again, resting my head atop hers.
"Were you good for them?"
"Mhm! I know how to behave." Her voice is muffled, though it still sounds cheery besides. My lips twitch into a sharp frown for a moment, masking it quick enough before she looks up. She looks so happy, her bright grin still splitting her face in two.
She's happy, that's the important part here. Don't ruin it.
"Atta girl." I say. Another hair ruffle, another giggle.
More warmth blossoms in my chest, it lingers on my heart before spreading, a tingling sensation following it.
I lose myself in the moment, just for a second, only coming broken from it when Felicity runs past, kicking up dust behind her as she does so. She runs herself into Cleons leg, the man's hand coming down to ruffle her already frazzled hair.
"See Dad? I told you nothing bad would happen!" She cheers triumphantly, her smug looking smirk stretching from ear to ear.
"So you did, so you did." Cleon replies with a patient tone, hand resting atop her head.
"That means she can come over more, right?" Her tone is a pleading one, hopeful. "You said she's allowed if everything was okay!"
Cleon hums, a finger tapping against his chin.
"Did I?"
"Yes!"
"Hm, I don't remember this…"
"Daaaaaad!" She looks and sounds exasperated, pouting as she glares up to him. It takes a moment, but he laughs, not chuckles, but honest to god laughs, cracked lips twisting up into a small smile.
"I said she's allowed over if Zeke's okay with it, don't forget about that, Felicity."
"Zeke's okay with it!"
"Are you sure?"
"Yup!"
"No, but he'll say yes anyways."
I can't help but laugh a little at the sight, Cleons stony face seems to have cracked just a little bit with her. Looks like he's enjoying teasing her.
'I wonder who that reminds me of.'
Who knows for sure, certainly not me.
'Mhm, whatever you say.'
Felicity suddenly turns around, jabbing a finger towards me.
"Zeke!" My ears twitch as she calls for me. She can pitch her tone pretty high, evidently, ow.
"That's me."
"Can Mabel come over again? Please? Pretty please?" She asks- no, pleads, her bottom lip trembling as she stares into my eyes.
Guess she really wants this to happen again, huh?
"If Mabel wants to and your parents are okay with it, then I'll be fine with it too." I reply with a shrug. She cheers in response, looks like she's taking that as a yes.
Excitable little thing, isn't she? Is this what kids are like?
'I imagine so, if we still had most of our memories, I can't recall any at the moment myself. Well, I imagine normal kids are like this, not yours.'
She's not mine- I don't even know why I'm trying to rebut you, you'll .
'Hah, it's impressive how dense you are.'
I'm aware. Better shake myself out of this conversation. At least Felicity's distracted with her dad again.
"So, do you want to stay over again sometime Mabel?" I ask her, turning my head as I do so.
I catch a glimpse of the look in her eyes, apprehension and unease stain the light in her eyes, a cautious sight trained solely onto Cleon.
My heart and gut twists at the sight. It's not one that should belong to a child.
It's wiped away with a blink, and she returns to reality once again. Golden eyes look back to me with the tilt of her head.
"Huh?"
"Do you want to stay over here again?" I ask again, slowly this time, keeping my voice low. She wrings her hands together, lips dipping into a small frown. She looks hesitant. I give her a soft smile, gently ruffling her hair. "It's only if you want to, Mabel."
"I do." She answers, with a barely audible whisper.
"Then it's settled."
"Just like that?" She sounds puzzled, and cautious, as if expecting more resistance. I wonder if she thinks I'm going to pull the rug from out under her feet.
"Mhm, just like that. We'll set a time for it, okay?" I say with a nod.
"...okay." She says after a moment of silence. She leans into me, her shoulder pressing into my chest. "Thank you."
"Any time, kid." I ruffle her hair again. I linger there for a bit before pulling away, standing upright and looking over to Cleon. "I'll properly set this up next time instead of springing it on you."
"Yay!"
"No problem." A cheer from one and a gruff reply from the other, the latter giving a stiff looking nod.
We filter back into the house, a home that looks a fair deal cleaner than before, scattered books stored away and other knick knacks stored away into its proper positions.
"There you all are, did everything go well?" Lyn asks us, eyes dancing between Cleon and I, a coy smile on her face.
"Cleon and I had a nice chat." I admit with a shrug. It was a bit awkward, but awkward conversations can still be good ones. Cleon grunts as a response. Lyn seems to take that as a positive answer though, judging from the widening smile on her face.
"Awh, would you look at that, I told you that you'd like him." She looks and sounds so smug as she talks. Felicity had a similar expression not too long ago though, guess it runs in the family.
"Mn." Cleon grunts again, a hand scratching his chin idly.
"She did!" Felicity adds on with a giggle, clasping her hands behind her back. Cleon remains mostly stone faced despite the needling from the two of them.
"Well, thank you for letting little Mabel over today." Lyn moves on from the ribbing, turning her attention onto me instead.
"Thank you all for being wonderful for her, especially on such short notice." I reply with a nod. A soft tugging from beside me catches my attention, I look down to the fox. "What's up Mabel?"
She bites her lip, wringing her hands together once more.
"T-thank you all." She barely manages to get that out before squeaking, her cheeks turning a bright red and pressing into my side.
Ah, my fucking heart. She's lovely.
"Awh! Ever a polite lady, aren't you?" Lyn coos, giving her the warmest damn smile I've ever seen. Not like she can see it though, her face continues to bury itself into my side. "You're very welcome dear, do come over again sometime."
"Yeah! I wanna play with you more!" Felicity chimes in. She seems to catch Mabel's attention though, judging by the sudden shifting of her head.
"R-really?"
"Mhm! You're super fun, I like having fun friends over." Felicity looks so proud of herself, a smug smirk on her face and her head held high. "A lotta kids here are boring, or mean, or something else that makes me not like 'em, but you're nice!"
Felicity's unabashed praise seems to get to the girl, though she dislodges herself from me, she can barely look her in the eye. She looks at something on her instead, her shirt, her forehead, something else other than her eyes, her cheeks turning ever more red until it's left as a deep crimson.
Shit, when was the last time someone complimented her other than me? She looks so flustered, she has no idea how to respond to it all! She doesn't look uncomfortable, no, she looks enthralled by the moment, the cutest fucking smile staining her face.
"T-thank you!" She barely manages to eke that out through her trembling lips. I'm enjoying this far too much, it's so sweet!
"Any time Mabel!" If she notices her new friends' nervousness she doesn't show it. "Come back soon, okay!"
"O-okay, I will!" She gives her a nod, a determined look in her eyes. God bless her, honestly.
'You lot are getting way too excited over two kids being friends. Cleon not included of course, he's acting like the only normal adult here.'
Are you kidding me? This is wonderful!
'Weirdo.'
"Ah, I do adore seeing you making friends dear." Lyn coos from behind the smaller one, a hand softly rubbing her head. She pouts and huffs, but doesn't move away.
"Moooom, I can make friends!"
"I know dear." She coos again, pulling away from her soon after. "Stay safe you two."
"I'll be sure to."
We give the family our goodbyes as we leave the house, as flustered as Mabel is, she can still wave and mumble.
The door shuts behind us with a resounding thud, wooden boards below creaking as we step off of the porch.
It's quiet as we stand outside the house, Mabel's clutch on my shirt tightens.
"So, do you like your new friend?" I ask the fox, teasingly of course. She squeaks something indecipherable out before shoving her face into my leg. I chuckle and kneel beside her, pulling her into a hug. She leans into it herself, face pressing into the crook of my neck.
"Thank you." I hear her whisper, though my ears strain to hear the mumbling. Sounds like a yes to me, I'll take it.
"Any time kid, want to get back to Anna's?"
"Yes please."
"Let's get going then." I give her a ruffle before standing upright, motioning away from the house with the flick of my head.
Wordlessly, she slips her hand into my own, squeezing lightly. I return the gesture, another bloom of warmth stirring within my chest.
We don't talk much as we wander down the road. It's rather quiet today, something I'm not entirely against. It's peaceful.
Paranoia still writhes in my gut. I feel eyes burning in the back of my head.
'Paranoia or reality, who's to say?'
I imagine we'll find out soon enough, until then, I'll just keep it to myself. It's a leisurely walk, we slowly make our way past the inn. Even that sounds rather quiet today. Must've been what Lyn meant when she said it's a slow day.
"Oy, young Zeke!" A voice comes out from beside me. Guess I spoke a bit too soon. I look over to the source, a familiar wrinkled face greets me, leaning against the front walls of the inn, a beaming smile on his face and a hand waving wildly."Taking self and young one out for walk? Is good day for it!"
"Hey Gerome, just heading back to Anna's actually. Mabel spent the day over at Lyns." I reply, petting said girls head in the meanwhile. She pushes against me in response, purring lightly. Sweet girl.
"Ah, Miss Lyn, she's lovely lady, no?" He lets out a small chuckle before turning his head and shoving it past the door. "Oy, young Ed! Friend is outside, come say hello!"
Edwards here? Huh, I guess I shouldn't be too surprised. He's been spending a fair bit of his time with Lucy after all. There's a small shuffle from inside, the door opening soon after.
"Hey Edward." I give him a small wave with my free hand, which he returns in kind. He has a rather relaxed look on his face, a corner of his lips twisted upwards
"Hey Zeke, surprised to see you around today."
"I'm surprised to see you hanging with people, I thought you'd be spending your time by yourself." I grin, giving the man a wink. "Or maybe you're here for someone else, hm?"
Edward rolls his eyes as Gerome laughs, sending him a side eye'd glare.
"Lucy is also lovely little lady, Gerome doesn't blame him for it!"
"Don't you get started again old man. I've already heard it plenty." He says with a scowl, though it looks like a smile threatens to break through regardless. I let out a soft chuckle, likely overshadowed by Geromes boisterous laughter. Edward looks away from him to me, his face softening. "How are you feeling though Zeke? Are you okay?"
"Hm?" I hum, tilting my head. Nothing's really happened recently, so why would he- Ah, right. The little 'incident' that happened a bit ago. I give him a nod. "Yeah, I'm feeling a lot better, just had to sit on it all for a bit."
"That's good." He says with a relieved sigh, a soft smile on his face. Warmth flickers in my chest from the sight.
"How about you? Are you doing alright, been up to much?"
"I'm alright myself, though I haven't done anything notable lately. Just thought I'd spend some time at the inn for a bit to relax, I ran into Gerome here along with Vector." He answers with a shrug. "Turns out that they're taking it easy today too, so we've been relaxing together."
"Really? Thought you two would be working today too, is it a slow day for you too?"
"Ah, today is very busy day around town center, just not busy day for us."
"Eh?" I tilt my head. The hell does he mean? Gerome hums to himself, scratching at his chin.
"Lots of buyers near town center is lookings for stock Gerome does not sell, you understand, da?" He extrapolates, eyes shifting from me to the kid.
Disgust churns around in my stomach.
"Ah, right." I keep my voice level, though I feel my lips dip into a frown. Explains why everything else is so slow today. Everyone looking to buy something would be there. I make a show of looking around the otherwise peaceful town. "Well, it'd be a shame to waste this nice day, I might end up taking the long way to Anna's."
"Mhm, is good idea to cherish good days, who knows when next will come?" He pushes himself off of the wall, clasping a hand on Edwards shoulder. "Will be waitings inside for you young Edward, take time with friend."
With that, he slips past the guardsman and inside, the door swinging behind. We're silent for a short bit, Edwards hand coming up to rub the back of his head.
"Well, I'm not the best at conversations, so I'll leave you to it. It's good to know that you're doing better though." He gives me a nod before turning around himself.
"Hey, wait a second!" I call out to him. He pauses mid stride, looking over to me.
"Hm?"
"I want a rematch!" I demand, pointing a digit towards the man. "Last time was bullshit and you know it, so I want to go again."
"You're a bit of a sore loser, aren't you?" He gives me a smug looking grin, a competitive glint in his eye. It softens soona after though. "Are you sure though? I don't want you to push yourself."
"Bah, I got a handle on myself now, I got it this time." I reply with a dismissive wave, though that warmth does flare up in my chest again. It feels nice, knowing that he's at least a little concerned. "Do you want to do it after tomorrow? I don't want you fighting with a hangover after all."
"Heh, I know my limits. We'll do it tomorrow, if you're fine with that."
"I'm more than fine with it. Do you know any good places for a duel, or do you just want to meet up at the barracks for it?"
"I do know a good little place for it, actually. Used to go there for some personal time and training when I was younger, we'll meet up here and I'll show you."
"Alright, it's settled then."
"Mhm. I'll see you tomorrow." He finishes the conversation with a wave, heading on inside after Gerome. I can't help but smile a little, the thought of another friendly duel with a friend gets my blood pumping, the flicker of energy tingling at the tips of my fingers.
The thought of a fight doesn't unease me anymore, I think that's a good sign.
'Probably. I imagine such a deficiency would be detrimental in our future.'
I don't want to actively seek out a fight with a life on the line.
'You might not have a choice in the matter.'
Bah, party pooper. I shake my head to clear my thoughts, kneeling down besides Mable once again.
"Hey kid, wanna get on my back for the walk to Anna's?"
"Yes please." I chuckle a little at her enthusiasm, dropping onto my knees and lowering myself for her. I feel her press against my back, her arms linking around my neck. "I'm ready."
"Alright, up we go." I slowly stand upright, reaching behind and looping my arms underneath her knees. It feels a little bit odd holding her this way, but she eventually settles into what feels like a stable position, her breath tickling the back of my neck before nuzzling into it. "Comfortable?"
"Yes."
"Then off we go." She giggles, a delightful chiming voice to my ears.
Let the walk home be a peaceful one.
….
The chirping of birds fills the air, the dirt soft and malleable beneath my feet. Mabel's soft breathing still tickles the back of my neck, I can feel her ears flicker against the back of my head every so often.
It's been a very quiet walk, little words being shared between us. Taking the long way around has had its consequences though, the suns dipped a fair bit further under the horizon, darkness since starting its encroachment along with it.
I'm surprised you're being so quiet tonight Adrian, anything on your mind?
'No, not particularly, just going through our head for a bit, seeing if I can dig something up. Just thinking, really.'
Ah, alright, I getcha. I'm here to help if you need anything. Surprisingly enough, he begins to hum to himself almost immediately afterwards, the sound reverberating in my skull.
There is something I want to ask you.
Shoot your shot, anything at all.
'You said before that you had 'experience' with how I feel, like… what did you say again? A puppet on strings? That analogy seems apt enough, just a puppet made of meat, how could you possibly have experience with that?'
Ah, right, that little scene with Lucy, I'm surprised that went as well as it did. That aside, do you remember those dreams I have? The ones where I have to dig a bit deeper into my head?
'Yeah? You told me a little bit about that.'
Hm, I have to do it every so often to beat back the Dark before it bubbles over. When I was there, once, I had to uh, fight myself.
'What?'
It was me, kind of. Just made of the Dark, it could contort and morph its body into whatever it wanted. It liked to use its whole arm as a fleshy sword, swung it around like it was made of paper but it tore up stone like it was dirt.
'How does this relate to the puppet shit?'
I'm getting there, this takes a bit of set up- wait, why don't you know part of this? It's in my memories, isn't it? Shouldn't you know it by digging through my head?
'I tried to do it more than once. There're some things I can't seem to remember myself, just as there's some things you can't seem to remember. I know what shotput is, you don't, you know the darkness in our head, I don't.'
Ah, that explains a few things, I think I forgot about that. Anyways, I first met it after, you know, the time where I had to fight those keidran.
'On the road? I can remember bits of that, it's hard to recall after being shoved back into your head.'
Mn. I was really confident fighting it initially. I quickly uh, lost control of the scenario though. Something about it was… well, inhuman.
'We're not human anymore.'
You know what I mean! Something about it just, put me on edge a lot quicker than I expected, I felt so powerless in front of it. I just couldn't fight the thing properly.
…I thought it was going to eat me alive. I remember its gnashing teeth, its awful grin. I can still imagine its teeth on my skin, though it never reached that point. I blanked out, then… something happened, I forgot, I remember waking up in an abyss, then waking up soon after that fighting the monster. But it wasn't me, it wasn't me controlling my arm, it was something else.
I remember being real pissed about that. I know that my body being taken away from me saved me from it, but I was furious, I wasn't thinking straight because of it all. I started to pull away from whatever was keeping me together, as much as it hurt, I refused to let something else take control away from me. Eventually, I yanked myself out of my own body, and it hurt like a bitch.
'...I see. Quite the strange story, and quite the answer too. Explains how you know the feeling, but who was controlling the body then?'
A little friend in my head, I've taken to calling them buddy. They help guide me through the nightmares, keep my heart at ease.
"Hey, Zeke?" Mabels call catches me by surprise, I didn't expect her to pipe up at the moment.
Sorry Adrian, we'll have to talk later.
'It's fine, you've answered plenty. I probably should've asked more in depth a while ago.'
It's fine, I probably should keep more people in the loop, you included.
'A fault we both share.'
"Yeah? What's up kid?" I answer the girl, feeling Adrians presence receding from my mind. She's silent for a bit, though I can feel her shifting against my back.
"Are you my dad?" She asks. My heart skips a beat, and I nearly trip over my own feet.
"W-what makes you ask that?" I try to delay the conversation just a little bit, doing my best to keep my voice level, and to stop my heart from thundering in my chest. Jesus Christ kid, just couldn't have asked at a more awkward time could you?
Well, Felicity said that Cleon and Lyn were her parents, her dad and her mom, and everyone has a mom and a dad at least. She said that they look after her, and you're looking after me, so…" She trails off, though I can feel her press her face against the back of my neck. "I thought that'd make you my dad."
I- hah, fucks sake, this is not the conversation I thought I'd be having. I shouldn't be angry at Felicity, and I'm not, just- fuck, I dunno the word, annoyed maybe? Slightly horrified at the conversation topic? One of them.
"Sorry kid, but I'm not your dad." I answer truthfully, but fuck, why does it hurt my chest so much? I'm not lying to her, I'm being as honest as I can possibly be.
"Oh, okay. Is she wrong then?"
"Well yes, but not intentionally, I'm sure."
"What's a dad then?" She continues to quiz me. I can feel her shuffle about, putting her chin on my shoulder.
"Well…" I trail off, scrambling through my brain for something. Fuck me, you couldn't have left at a less convenient time, could you Adrian? Bastard man. "When you're born, you're born to two different people, your mom and your dad. Your dad is the male one, your mom the female one. They're meant to love you and help you as you grow up."
I think that's a good enough description, right? Fuck, maybe I shouldn't have worded it like that, if she asks about how being born works I'm going to lose my mind.
"Do I have a dad then?"
"Mhm, you do." She's silent for a bit, letting out a soft hum. I hope that this is the end of the conversation, but I know it isn't.
"Where is he then?" She asks again, in a soft whisper. I bite my lip. Fuck, isn't that the million dollar question? I can feel her heart beating against my back, feel the tips of her claws pressing against my neck. "Why did he leave me? Does he remember me? What is he doing? Does he care, does he lo-love me?"
Her voice quickly turns frantic, her breaths turning to short and needy gasps of air.
Right, I'm not letting that train of thought continue. I take a quick knee and slip her off of my back, placing her down in front of me. Unshed tears brim along the bottom of her eyes.
"Kid, I need you to listen to me for a second." I begin, looking down to her. She looks up to me, the early moonlight shining off of gold.
"O-okay." She says with a nod, sniffling soon after. My heart feels as if it's breaking at the sight. I cup both sides of her head with my hands, rubbing a thumb over her cheeks.
My heart feels heavy. I refuse to lie to her, but I refuse to let her stew in her thoughts like this.
"I don't know where your dad is, and I don't know what he's doing." I begin, my voice low and heart throbbing with pain. "I might not know who he is ever, but I refuse to think that he doesn't love you, that he wouldn't take care of you if he was given the chance."
"Then why isn't he here?"
"Because sometimes people aren't given a choice in what they want to do, sometimes they're forced to do something they hate, parents included." My voice sounds bitter, even to me. Keep your anger in check, dammit. I sigh to myself, continuing to brush the teary eyed foxes face. "Your parents could love you truly and utterly with all their hearts, but sometimes the people in life are cruel and don't care for love."
Fuck, I'm not suited for this conversation. She seems to have calmed down a little at least, her sniffling at least comes slower.
"D-do you really think that?"
"With all of my heart, Mabel. You're a lovely kid, anyone with a single bone of kindness in their body would adore you."
"What if you're wrong? W-what if they wanted me gone?" She asks, her eyes looking downcast, her voice sounding so empty.
My heart shatters.
I gently pull the poor girl into a hug, rubbing a hand up and down her back. She at least returns it, I can feel her wet face pressing into my shirt.
"Then I'm wrong, and the people who made you see very very dumb." That answer, somehow, manages to get a small giggle out of her, though it's obscured by sniffling. Can't say I know why, but I'll take it. "I hope that they do love you though, because you deserve someone looking after you. I'm a very poor choice, but desperate situations call for any shmuck to help."
There's another giggle from her, her arms around my body tightening slightly. Hey, if it makes her laugh and feel better, I'll take it for life. Her breathing eventually slows and softens, her anxious beating heart becoming steady and strong, her body relaxing into me.
"Feeling a bit better?" I ask, softly patting her back.
"Mhm." Her response is muffled again, but her nodding is a perfect answer within itself. She eventually pulls away. Her eyes are reddened and her smile looks fragile, but I can still see that flicker of determination in her eye. "Thank you."
"Any time kid, I'll do all I can for you." I ruffle her head, enjoying her adorable giggle for as long as I can. "...besides, I truly believe that someone else loves you. Maybe not a parent, but someone else."
"Really? Why?" She tilts her head, gold glowing in the dark.
Because I've seen her, someone that looks so much like you, a determined and sad fox with eyes made of gold.
"A very strong hunch, and maybe a birdie told me too." I answer instead, messing up her hair with a hand. I'll keep my heartache to myself.
"Okay!" She says with a titter, her fragile smile looking just that little bit stronger. It's a wondrous sight, a moment that I'll cherish so long as I live.
I wish I could stay here longer, just in the moment of her happiness. But I know all things come to an end.
It doesn't help that I know the voyeur that's looking over us is ruining the fucking moment.
I quickly stand upright, turning to face the forest.
"Wha-'
"Stay behind me, Mabel, get ready to run to Anna's."
"Okay." I keep the girl close with a hand resting on her head, shoving the other into my pocket.
I wrap my fist around the daggers hilt, squeezing tight.
"You really need to find a better hobby, you mother fucker." I call out to the woods, furrowing my brow and glaring up into the branches. The trees are quiet for longer than I'm comfortable with. My heart falters for a moment before I grit my teeth, forcing it to steel itself. No, I know he's here dammit!
Silence.
Then a slow clap.
"Bah, you're really no fun to play with nowadays!" A cocky voice replies from above. The air around the trees seems to vibrate for a moment, a shimmer that slowly fades from view. The bastard, still clad in that black cloak, continues to clap away, his legs swinging from the branches. "I thought I'd win that little game too, but noooo, you're just too damn perceptive now, for shame!"
"What do you want?" I want to cut to the chase and get this bastard away from us, away from her. "Don't you have anything better to do than stalk me?"
"Whatever could you mean, dear Knight? I'm working at this moment, reconnaissance with a target of interest is quite important after all."
"Cut the shit!" I bark, a snarl crawling its way out of my throat. "What. Do. You. Want?"
"Tsk tsk, you're extra testy tonight, aren't you? And on such a lovely night with such an adorable fox." He cackles, then hums, a gloved hand reaching into his hooded face. "Hm, she's such a familiar looking fox too, I can't help but wonder why."
He knows. He knows exactly who she looks like, and of course he'd know because he fucking owned her. There's another cackling, his hands clasping together once more
"But! I'm not here for anything related to a fox, I've my hands plenty busy with one, let alone another. No no, I'm here for something else, something I've left behind." He leans forward, resting his head atop his hands. "Something I believe you still have. I do hope you have it on hand, otherwise I may have to take something els-"
I don't let the bastard finish his sentence, arm outstretched and pelting the damned knife towards him. It buries itself in the tree trunk besides him, right up to the hilt.
"Fuck you, I hope you gut yourself with it." I hiss, venom filling both voice and veins. He tuts, reaching over and resting a hand on the hilt of it.
"Quite the short fuse, hm? Can't even let me mess around a little." He mutters, I can see his muscles tensing beneath the coat as he tears the knife away. Bits of wood and bark splutter out from it, and he rests his spare hand on his chest. "You just have no respect for a man's performance, don't you? For his effort in creating a scene?"
"Performance? Is that what you call this? Wasting time and energy with this shit? Your effort means nothing." I sneer. That seems to get under the bastard's skin, I can see his fists tightening, his legs stiffly hanging from the branch instead of swinging freely.
"Nothing? Nothing!? You call this nothing? To sneak through a town without alerting a single person without magic to preserve it for important moments? To keep myself hidden from what few magically inclined people live in this damned backwater village? To use portals to zip between areas on top of all that?" He rants and rants, the knife digging into the branch he's sitting on.
He's just as proud as I remember, and it's certainly getting on his nerves. Fuck him.
"Worse than worthless, you're putting in this much effort, and that's you calling it effort, into what amounts to just watching me. Are you truly that dull that you see this as a good use of time?" I jab a finger towards the hooded bastard. "If this ties into your performance, then it'll be a failure, just like how I imagine you are."
"You damnable, unlovable ignoramus, you pathetic slave to a-" He suddenly stops mid rant, taking a hissing intake of air. He holds it for a second, then two before letting it go. "Hah, haaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. I've heard worse from worse folk, yet you still manage to slip underneath my skin. How interesting."
He leans forward, I can imagine the smirk on his face, even through the darkness.
"I have an offer to give you, little fox-"
"No." Mabel answers before I can speak, much to my surprise.
"No?"
"No. I don't care what your offer is. I don't trust you." I look down to her as she speaks. She presses her side into me, but she looks forward with that lovely determined look of hers.
Pride swells in my chest at the sight. Atta girl.
"You got what you wanted." I say looking over to the Stranger once more. "Now, beat it."
He throws his hands in the air, a frustrated sounding growl coming from him.
"Fine, fine! I'll leave you then. Next time we meet, it'll be when I deign to let fate proceed. Goodbye." He clicks his fingers, a spot of black opening behind him. He falls backwards and into it, disappearing from view. The portal disappears soon after.
I let out a deep, shuddering breath, one I wasn't aware I was holding, relief flooding my veins. Fuck, maybe that wasnt a smart idea in the long run, but I needed him away from Mabel.
Shit, Mabel.
"Are you okay kid?" I quickly ask, looking down to face her. She looks up to me with a determined look of her own, nodding.
"I'm okay, did you know that man?"
"Mn." I grunt, softly tapping atop her head as I begin to walk. She matches my pace. "I don't remember him very well, but we've met a few times recently."
"Why do you know him? He seems like a bad human." I know she's just asking because she's curious, but I flinch regardless. Fuck, another unwanted conversation, I was hoping to avoid this too.
"Well…"I begin again, rattling through my brain again for an answer. That I've had to do that again so soon is frustrating. "When I was younger, a long time ago, I wasn't a very good person."
"Huh? Really?"
"Mhm. I was a very bad person, who did very bad things with other, very bad people. He was different back then, more sane, but he still did a lot of bad things." It hurts to admit it to her, but I won't lie to her, never will. It probably doesn't help that I can't look her in the eye, I don't think my heart could handle it.
"You're not very bad now, though, are you?"
"No, not anymore. I lost my memories, basically all of them, I can only remember a few things from back then. Even then, I'm a lot different from back then." I look down to my hands, slowly clenching and unclenching them. I've done a lot of bad things with these hands, and I know that I'll only remember worse things. "I want to be different, I want to be good, I want to look after people. I-I don't like being angry at people, not even him."
We're quiet for a while, a long, long while. Both my heart and gut enjoy spending the silence flipping and twisting in on themselves, the traitorous bastards.
I sigh, fuck, I really dicked this up, haven't I? I open my mouth to apologize to the poor girl, though her tugging seems to come first again. I hesitate, but look down to her eventually, meeting her gaze.
Determination dances behind her eyes.
"I think you're a good person, I believe in you!" She says with a bright grin. She says it so honestly, with so much pure resolve, I can almost believe it myself.
I return her smile with one of my own, though it feels stiff and forced, even as my eyes sting. I rest a hand on her head, masking the shaking with petting her instead. My heart sings as she purrs aloud, pressing up and into my hand willingly.
"Thank you, kid." I finally reply, eking it out before I can choke on my words.
If she can believe in me, then I have to believe in myself.
I must. For myself, and for the others.