24

Edward could feel Bella shaking as she clutched onto the back of his shirt. Hell, so was he, but he'd known what to expect when Felix walked into the house. It were his eyes that always haunted Edward the most. The way they bore into his soul. Being told that Felix looked like the monster who ruined your life was one thing, but seeing the monster who haunted your every nightmare was something else.

"Felix, thank you for coming," Carlisle said, sharing a look with Edward before he walked over and offered the man his hand, who shook it before quickly releasing it. "Just, um, a quick little heads up. Bella doesn't like to be touched, so be aware of that when you're around her."

Felix, Tyler, and Garrett all looked from Carlisle to Edward, tilting their heads to the side to look at Bella, who he felt move so that she was completely hidden by him.

"I'm sure we can accommodate that," Felix agreed while Tyler and Garrett simply nodded. "We should probably get settled before we compare notes."

"Of course," Carlisle said, gesturing toward Emmett. "He will show you to your rooms, and then we will meet you in the office. Let's give it half an hour."

"Yes, of course," Felix replied, tearing his eyes away from Edward and Bella.

He, Tyler, and Garrett followed Emmett down the hallway to their rooms. The moment they were out of sight, Edward felt Bella release the back of his shirt and when he looked behind him, he saw her turn and hightail it upstairs. Edward clenched his hands into tight fists before he said, "I told you this was a fucking mistake," and then followed Bella upstairs to the third floor and opened the door to her bedroom, finding her in the farthest corner of the room with her knees pulled up in front of her, her arms wrapped around them, and tears sliding down her cheeks.

"I never put two and two together," she cried. "The face from my nightmares to the man who created those nightmares. And then I saw him and I knew, I fucking knew, Edward. How could he do that to us? We were fucking babies for crying out loud? How do you look at a baby and think, you know what I should do? Rape them!"

"I don't know, Bella. I've asked that same question more times than I can count," he admitted, closing the door and leaning against it, sliding to the floor. "I don't think I ever want to understand how people like him think."

"Yeah," she whimpered. "I made the right decision, didn't I? Saying yes to . . . to them. That was the right decision, wasn't it?"

"It was."

He tried to sound more confident than he felt, because if he were honest, with her, with himself, he was having the same doubts about bringing Felix and his team in. Tyler and Garrett were good guys, strong and dedicated to their jobs, and so was Felix, but just being near him was a slap in the face to the horrors they endured as children.

"Liar," she quipped.

"Fine, I'm not sure. I don't have all the answers, Bella. When I took on your case, I wasn't expecting to be going down this rabbit hole again. I just . . . I just thought it was some crazy fan, and I'd get to spend some time with you while I stopped them, but it's so much worse I thought," he blubbered, blowing out a deep breath to keep from outright crying. He clenched his hands into tighter fists as he brought them up to the side of his head. "I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologizing to me?" she asked and he heard her moving and when he looked up, she was crawling on the floor toward him. She stopped and shifted so that she was sitting on her legs. Reaching out, she placed her hands on his, pulling his arms down to his side. "Edward."

"I don't want you to hurt anymore," he whispered, turning and threading his fingers in with hers, bringing them to his lips. "And I don't want to be the one hurting you."

"You could never hurt me."

"I did, though. They made me. They fucking made me!"

Bella slipped her hands out from his and sighed. "I'm trying really hard not to think about that."

"I wish I could forget."

"Forget me, you mean?"

"No, no, no," he stammered, shaking his head. "Just . . . I hated the way you would cry when . . . when they made me touch you. I hated it, Bella."

She nodded and reached for his hand, which he laid in hers. His eyes widened as she brought his hand up and laid it on top of her breast. Over her shirt, of course.

"Bella," he breathed, his eyes shifting up to hers.

"I'm not scared of you touching me," she whispered and she moved her hand from over hers, leaving his on her breast. "You're the only person who makes me feel safe, Edward. The only person I can trust right now."

"You really trust me," he murmured, sliding his hand along her breast, feeling her nipple harden beneath her bra.

"I do," she moaned, biting her lip. "I really do."

"I trust you, too." Edward kept his hand on her breast as he shifted so that he was on his knees in front of her, placing his other hand on her hip and pulling her against him. His eyes shifted to her lips and then back to her eyes as he whispered, "Can I kiss you?"

She smiled. "You never have to ask, love."

Edward grinned as she threw his words back at him, before closing the distance between them. His lips brushed against hers once, twice, a third time before he pressed down harder. Bella moaned, her lips parting against his. Edward tentatively pressed his tongue against her bottom lip. He felt her tense for a moment before she melted against him, her tongue pressing against his.

However, as had been the norm over the last twenty-four hours, the sound of someone knocking on her bedroom door pulled them apart. Bella was breathing heavily as she leaned her forehead against his. "Why do they always pick the most unfortunate times to come knocking?"

Edward laughed and kissed her again before he stood up with her pressed against him. "Believe me, I know, sweetheart."

He turned and wrapped his hand around the doorknob, and when he opened it, he bit back his annoyance when he found Charlie standing there with his hands shoved into his pockets. The man with dark salt and pepper hair shifted his eyes from Edward back to Bella, who was standing halfway behind him.

"Can I talk to you, Bee? Alone."

"Yeah, sure." Bella nodded, giving Edward a look. "We'll met you downstairs. Maybe we'll actually get to eat something for a change."

Edward forced out a laugh, but he wasn't sure he should leave her and Charlie alone. There was just something about him that set him off, that made him not trust him. Maybe Bella was right and he was a good, loving father, but he could have saved her years of feeling like there was something wrong with her if he'd just told her the truth about the first five years of her life. But that wasn't his business, so instead, he stepped out of the way and let Charlie Swan enter her bedroom before he looked back at her and headed downstairs, hearing the sound of her bedroom door close. The urge to hover was strong, but he knew Bella wouldn't want him, to, so instead, he hurried into the kitchen and started making him and Bella some breakfast.

He was in the middle of cooking the bacon when the door to the kitchen opened and Rosalie entered, a porcelain coffee cup in her hands.

"Oh, hey," she said, clearing her throat. "I was just going to get some more coffee."

Edward nodded and used a fork to flip the bacon. "I just made a fresh pot. Figured she'd want some after she talks to Charlie."

"Probably." Rosalie walked over and filled her cup before she turned and looked at him. "Is she okay?"

"No," he admitted. "She's not."

"Of course she's not," Rosalie murmured. "I should have called him sooner, made her let him come."

"Why didn't you?" Edward asked. "If he's so important to her, why didn't you call Charlie in sooner, Rosalie?"

She frowned. "My dad had cancer. That's why he decided to move us from New York to Wyoming. They didn't think he was going to survive and he said he didn't want to spend the rest of his life in the city. He wanted wide open spaces and freedom and time to reconnect to me, to my mom. I was ten years old and being uprooted from everything I knew, from my home. My dad was dying, and I was angry, Edward. And then I started school and I saw her. She was terrified of everything, and everyone knew it.

"They made fun of her, called her a freak, a loser, made a point of getting so close that she would start crying. They were a bunch of little assholes and I didn't understand how they could look at her and not see how much they were breaking her every fucking day, Edward. So I vowed to protect her, to make them stop. Mostly behind her back, because I didn't want to force myself on her, but then I was on my way to the library when I saw this little shit named Eric corning her in the hallway.

"Most of them got close, but they never actually touched her, you know, but Eric did. He put his hand on her face and she started screaming, Edward. Just blood-curling screams, and I found myself grabbing him by the hair and throwing him on the ground, kicking him so hard in his balls, I bet he still feels it. Mrs. Cope, our librarian came out into the hallway, saw her crutched against the wall, him crying on the floor, and called Charlie. He, of course, hurried down to the school, demanded Eric's head on a silver platter. He was suspended and Charlie took her home, but he thanked me for helping her, Edward. He fucking thanked me for being a decent human being and helping her.

"When my mom came and picked me up, she asked me what happened because the principal had called her, but she had taken my dad to his chemo appointment, and I found myself sitting in the front seat of her car just crying over this little brown haired girl and my dad and Charlie thanking me for helping her. I just cried, Edward, letting out so much that I was holding in, I guess. When I went to school the next day, I wasn't expecting her to be there, because I know I sure as hell wouldn't have been, but there she was, pretending she hadn't had a full blown panic attack just the day before. Nobody messed with her, though. Maybe they were just too scared, I don't know, but when it was time for lunch, I was sitting at my usual table, alone, when she walked over and sat across from me. She didn't say anything, so I didn't say anything, but every day she sat with me at lunch. Eventually, she and I started talking and Charlie invited me out to their ranch and we became lifelong best friends. My Dad went into remission, and I had a best friend, Edward. I felt like I was getting everything I wanted, you know.

"And then my parents were killed in a car accident, and I was alone again. Did you know that Charlie and Bela were the only people who showed up to their funeral?"

Edward shook his head.

"They were my family, Edward, my only family. Charlie petitioned the court for custody of me, and I went to live with them. When Bella broached the idea of leaving Wyoming for California, I wasn't convinced it was the right move, for either of us honestly, but her music was all she had and she needed it to be heard. It's her voice, her way of expressing all the feelings she keeps locked away inside of her, so I applied to school here, got a degree that would help her career, and I've been fighting for her ever since. I know it doesn't seem like it, Edward, but Charlie has, too."

He nodded. "You're right, it doesn't. Why didn't he teach her self-defense?"

"You don't think he tried?" she asked, tilting her head to the side. "She's always been too scared to learn to fight, Edward. Until she met you, at least. Charlie tried to teach her, teach us, before we left Wyoming, but she just shook her head, said she didn't need it. She would carry mace, and she does. She never goes anywhere without mace, but mace isn't going to stop someone like Marcus Volturi, is it?"

"Probably not," he admitted. "But then again, I don't know that anything will stop him, if he's the person after her, after us. He's . . . diabolical, and evil."

Rosalie sipped on her coffee. "He begged her to let him come to her, Edward, every day for months, but she feels guilty for needing him so much, for being so dependent on him. It's not rational, and she'd admit that, but it's how she felt and he refused to be one more person forcing himself on her, so he watched over her from Wyoming, and he and I talked a thousand times a day."

"Suppose I get that."

"Do you love her?"

Edward inhaled a sharp breath before he shifted his eyes to her. "I care about her."

"But do you love her?"

"I . . ." Edward shook his head. "I don't know, Rosalie. She's been a part of my life for a long, long time, and losing her again makes my chest hurt," he admitted, placing a hand over his heart. "But love? I don't know that I even know what loves feels like."

"She needs you, Edward. She needs you like she needs her music. Don't . . . Don't let her go, even if she pushes you away. Fight for her, because even though it scares me, she smiles with you."

Rosalie turned and walked out of the kitchen, letting the door swing shut. Edward had just stabbed the bacon with his fork when the door to the kitchen opened again, and he found Bella standing there. Her eyes were red and puffy, her cheeks stained from her tears. She'd never looked more beautiful than she did in that moment. Maybe Edward did know what love felt like after all. Maybe love felt like being able to breathe for the first time.

"How'd you know I'm a sucker for bacon?"

Edward laughed. "It's bacon. Who doesn't like bacon?"

"Charlie."

"Wait, wait, wait, he doesn't like bacon?"

"Not really," she said, shrugging her shoulders as she walked over and sat at the table, crossing her legs at her knee. "Are they in the office?"

Edward shrugged his shoulders. "I didn't check."

"Why not?"

"Because I'm not exactly looking forward to being around him, either, Bella," he said, pulling the last of the bacon out of the pan and drained the grease before placing it back on the stovetop. "How do you like your eggs?"

"Over-medium."

Edward sprayed the pan before picking up one of the eggs and cracking it with a quick, sharp bang on the counter and letting it slip into the pan. "Did you have a good talk with Charlie?"

"Not really," she admitted, and when he looked at her, she had her fingers wrapped around the silver locket around her neck. "He seems to think I'm getting too attached to you."

"Are you?"

"Yes," she confessed. "He's just worried about me, Edward. About us."

"And we are an 'us', aren't we?"

"I assumed we were, considering we've kissed. I mean, I don't know how you feel, but —"

Before she could finish speaking, the door to the kitchen was pushed open and they both looked over, finding Felix standing there. His eyes shifted from her to him, and he pressed his lips together before looking back at her.

"So, you're America's Sweetheart, huh?"

Bella scrambled to her feet, and hurried over to Edward, grabbing the back of his shirt. "I don't like being called that."

"I wouldn't want to be called that, either." He stepped into the kitchen and let the door swing closed behind him. "I was told I could get some coffee."

Edward gestured toward the coffee pot. "Cups are in the cabinet above it."

Felix nodded before he walked over and pulled one of the black and white cups from the cabinet and filled it to the top before he turned and looked at him and Bella. "Haven't seen you in a while, Edward. What's it been a year?"

"Seventeen months, actually." Edward flipped Bella's eggs. "And three days, not that I'm counting."

Felix grinned. "Yeah, not that you're counting." His eyes flickered to Bella again. "I don't believe we've been properly introduced. My name is Felix Moreno. I know who you are, of course. The whole Goddamn world knows who America's Sweetheart is."

"So I've been told," she whispered, and Edward turned and placed his hand on the back of her head, trying to reassure her that he was there, that he wasn't going to let anyone near her again.

"I'm sure you've been told a lot about me, Bella Swan." Felix's eyes shifted from her to Edward and back. "He's never liked me. Not that I blame him. I do like look like the bastard who ruined all of our lives. I'm forced to look at this face every fucking day of my life, though."

"Why are you here, Felix?" Edward asked, using the spatula to move Bella's eggs from the skillet and onto her plate. He added half the bacon he'd made them before moving the plate on the other side of them and shifting her so that he was standing between them. "Eat, sweetheart."

She picked up a piece of bacon, but her eyes were locked on Felix.

"You got your coffee, Felix. Go back to the office."

He didn't move, though. "Not until we clear the air, Edward."

He had just picked up an egg and crushed it between his fingers, causing egg yolk to cover his fingers. "We're eating."

"So I can see. I didn't want any, though. Thanks for asking."

Edward scoffed as he used a paper towel to clean the broken egg off his fingers and picked up another egg, breaking it and letting it drop back into the skillet. "Why'd you agree to come help?"

"Because of her," he admitted, gesturing toward Bella.

"Me?" she stammered.

He nodded.

"Why me?"

"Because if my sperm donor is indeed alive, and not rotting in the deepest pits of hell where he belongs, he won't rest until he has you back in his grasp, and I won't walk away and let that son-of-a-bitch hurt you again. Once was bad enough."

"You remember me?"

Felix frowned. "Not like Edward does, but yes. I was a few years older than you, but I remember being in that dorm, watching as he picked you every time. I saw the way you cried when they'd bring you back. We all cried, but it was different with you. He was different with you."

"He did the same thing to you as he did to us?"

Felix shook his head. "No, Marcus never touched me, Bella. I was his kid, but his brothers on the other hand . . ." He gestured toward his face. "They didn't give two shits whose kid I was."

"They cut you?"

He nodded. "And worse. They were going to kill me, that's why my mother snuck me out, escaped with me. They were going to kill me to keep him in line. See, he wanted to branch off his little sector. Didn't like the way his brothers were coddling us, felt they were too easy on us. Can you imagine? They raped us, beat us, cut us, but they were too gentled for my sperm donors taste." He shook his head. "My mother wasn't going to let them kill me. Beat me, rape me, torture me, sure, but she drew the line at killing me. So she snuck into the dorms one night in the middle of January and wrapped me in a blanket and we walked away."

"Just like that? She just walked away and you started fresh?"

"No," Felix scoffed, turning and placing his coffee cup on the counter behind him before folding his arms in front of him. "We made it three towns over before she left me standing in the middle of the cold with only a blanket. I was freezing and scared and crying when I was found by an older couple, who took me to the local hospital. I found myself surrounded by people, demanding answers to questions I didn't even understand. My whole life had been spent inside the Gathering of Twilight. My mom was only thirteen when he knocked her up. I just. . . I just sat there with several blankets wrapped around me, staring at police officers and doctors and nurses, all demanding that I tell them what I didn't know. And then they got the call about a girl jumping from a bridge."

Edward scooped his eggs out of the pan before adding the rest of the bacon and scooting closer to Bella, who was so tense, so rigid a gentle breeze would topple her over.

"Your mom killed herself?" she asked.

Felix nodded. "Guess the shame of letting men rape and torture her son was just too much for her live with, and she took the coward's way out. The couple who found me stayed by my side until CPS came in. They sent me to a boys' home, where I lived for seventy-eight days until I went to live with the people who found me. They adopted me about a year later, and I grew up to be the well-adjusted man I am today."

"Yeah, you're the poster child for well-adjustment," Edward scoffed, picking up a piece of his bacon and shoving it into his mouth.

"Well, at least I don't still wet the bed," he quipped.

"I was sixteen and found myself face to face with the person who looked eerily like the man who tortured and raped me for the first five years of my life. It scared the shit out of me, Felix."

"Scared me, too," he admitted turning and picking up his coffee cup. "I'm not like them, Edward. I've spent the last twenty years trying to keep kids like us out of the hands of people like them."

"Yeah, I know."

"Finish eating. We have work to do." Felix walked over to the kitchen door before he stopped and looked from Edward to Bella and back. "If he is the one after her, I will do everything I can to stop him."

As soon as he was out of the room, Edward dropped his fork and took several steps backward, hitting the front of the fridge and bending over so that he was bracing himself on his knees.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry," Bella said, and when he looked up at her, she stretched her hand out to him. "You and me, Edward, we're in this together. No matter what, you and me."

He wrapped his fingers around hers and pulled her against him, his other arm coming up and resting on the back of her head. "You and me."

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